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/lit/ - Literature


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18514044 No.18514044 [Reply] [Original]

>library wizard turned all the books into Enochian language

>> No.18514071
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18514071

>>18514044
Nice. I only need to learn a single language to be able to read all books.

>> No.18514080

>>18514044
>Library goblins are page swapping again.

>> No.18514087

>In library
>Trying to read
>Speed readers keep revving their engines
>Can't focus.

>> No.18514131

>>18514044
>try to read library tome without library card
>become cursed
it’s not worth it bros just get the card

>> No.18514197
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18514197

>>18514044
>library wizard isn’t wearing panties

>> No.18514248

>ask the cat to help me find call of the arcade
>leads me into the labyrinth again
>steals my lunch money again
>get analy raped by the cosmic squid again

i need to stop asking him for help
but hes so cute

>> No.18514632

>>18514044
>tfw the qt librarian saw me fail bookmark inspection day again

>> No.18514687

>browsing lectures on tape
>library kangaroo steals the next in the series
>hops away

>> No.18514868

>library waitress only speaks latin

>> No.18514897

>go to library to pick up book
>they have the book
>check it out and leave with book

It's that fucking easy guys holy shit

>> No.18514919

>>18514197
Is that George Bush?

>> No.18514950

>>18514919
Roger the dodger rogerson.

>> No.18514961

>>18514071
But you miss out of the beautiful original script.

>> No.18514973

>walk inside library
>the local transients have started a cock fighting ring in the YA section
>bookie keeps following me around the library asking "what's the hubub, bub?" with a buck toothed grin

>> No.18515002

>move to a new district
>the only new one has a modern logo: a sign that it was either updated with a new brand in order to stay modern, or an a new one
>it was the latter
>has entire wall of Harry Potter
>one shelf is ordered by numbers
>the other is by first letters
>another is by the order release
>on the others, it's a repetition, but with the in-between ordering being different (a repeat, a sub-ordering (1,1,1 or 1,2,3)
>go home without looking at the other parts of the library, not being able to remove the image from my head and its signs still on retina
>go asleep every night thinking of different systems of organising thousands of Harry Potter books in shelves in a single library (when I can't sleep, I up to dozens of thousands; have gone up to 30 000)

>> No.18515009

>>18515002
>the only new one
*the only library
What a glaring flaw.

>> No.18515027
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18515027

>>18514044
>Beaten to death by library detectives for reckless theorising.
>Spirit sent to serve purgatory in Westerns section
>Condemned to watching helplessly as the tales of the old west are buried under eons of sand

>> No.18515052

>thought the book trickster rearranged all the chapters, confused grammatical tenses, inserted a bunch of fart noises and merged languages again
>actually just reading finnegans wake
close call, bros

>> No.18515141

>>18514961
Is there anything more pleb than reading books in the original language?

>jealous monoglots can only read books in the original language
>patrician polyglots like myself can read the works of Goethe in French, the masterpieces of Proust in the superior Russian, Chinese and Japanese works in the opposite language, etc., opening up new vistas of interpretation and understanding

I tried reading a book in the original language once, just to see what it's like being a pleb, and it was a suffocating and nauseous experience. I pity those for whom there is no other option.

>> No.18515151

>>18515027
Hahaha

>> No.18515165

>library installs a more accurate penis inspection scanner
>friend suddenly doesn't want to go to the library anymore

>> No.18515419

>>18514897
>he doesn’t know
anon...if they let you go that easy they’re setting you up for a sting. you’re fucked

>> No.18515523

>always leave my callslips in the library wishing well at the end of my visit
>never get visited by the book faerie
It's not fair bros!! My friends get new books from the book faerie all the time! Why am I so cursed?

>> No.18515621

off topic but best book to start with on enochians?

>> No.18517138

>>18515141
The best way to read a book is to read it in the exact opposite language.

Harry Potter? Reading it in Mandarin. Tao Te Ching? I'll take the south western USA translation thank you very much.

A book is only good if it's good even when translated to the exact opposite of the author's attention.

>> No.18517157
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18517157

>enter the library
>enter the elevator
>go up, furiosuly masturbating
>arrive at the top floor
>cum in the empty bucket as a token of my good will
>not enough semen goes in
>'the hounds has been released' echoes from the speaker
>mfw

>> No.18518675

>>18517138
I only ever read books that have a "NOT" edited at the end of every sentence. If the opposite of what the author wrote does not make sense, it is safe to say I can disregard his body of work.

>> No.18518683

>>18514044
Jokes on them the library ravens speak the language of the birds and Icelandic

>> No.18520537

>>18514044
>bookworms in my book
>birds won't leave me alone

>> No.18520587

>>18514044
based

>> No.18522160
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18522160

>The homo hobos declared war against the Sanskrit Shamans in the manga section
this isn't going to end well.....

>> No.18522197
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18522197

>>18514044
>library paedophile starts reading Lolita out loud again

>> No.18522570

>cleaners erased gay hookup schedule in the toilet and the cubicle had all bottoms and no tops or switches

>> No.18522592

>>18514897
Nice larp faggot