[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/lit/ - Literature

View post   
File: 50 KB, 500x625, 1306504860892.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825049 No.1825049 [Reply] [Original]

ITT: We describe books poorly.

(picture unrelated)

>> No.1825050

A man suffers from sunstroke and does something he sort of regrets.

>> No.1825061

>>1825050

The Stranger

>> No.1825065

>>1825061
Ayup.

Let's see... a woman buys some flowers.

>> No.1825067

Tough one: a man dreams up the perfect woman and is startled to actually find her in a bookshop. Then he gets pneumonia.

>> No.1825073

>>1825065
Mrs. Dalloway.

An English teacher gets in trouble overseas.

>> No.1825075

>>1825073
Right.

Don't know yours I'm afraid.

A man discovers he actually likes Japan.

>> No.1825078

Pedophile goes on holiday, gets sick and dies.

>> No.1825106

>>1825078
No one else playing? A Death in Venice.

>> No.1825110

this dude's little brother is something of a medium. he senses a great danger and tries to convince his compatriots to flee with him to a new land. a handful oblige, and they set off.

>> No.1825113

I would be playing if I got any of these :(
>>1825110
I ALMOST got this one.

>> No.1825116

>>1825110
Watership Down?

>> No.1825119
File: 83 KB, 507x698, 1214.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825119

Some guy runs a steamboat up the river to find other guy that dies afterward.

>> No.1825120
File: 9 KB, 250x200, dinv.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825120

>>1825106
*clappity clap

>> No.1825121

A guy gets all butthurt about some bitch.

>> No.1825122
File: 286 KB, 975x984, heart of darkness.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825122

>>1825119

>> No.1825125

>>1825119
heart of darkness

>> No.1825128
File: 34 KB, 518x392, wuthering-heights.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825128

>>1825121

>> No.1825131

Two men look really similar, but have very different personalities. They travel around a bit.

>> No.1825132

A bunch of midgets and an old man go into the woods.

>> No.1825135
File: 63 KB, 428x276, thehobbit.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825135

>>1825132
lol

>> No.1825138

Chick thinks guy hates her, but he doesn't.

>> No.1825140

>>1825135
Surely Lord of the Rings is more likely?

>> No.1825144

>>1825132
lord of the rings

>>1825131
fight club?

>> No.1825145

>>1825138
That could be a lot of things. Fight Club would even fit.

>> No.1825146

>>1825128
You just won the highest honor Vdubby can bestow on an anon. I thought with it being so broad it'd take more guesses.

Good show old sport.

>> No.1825149

>>1825144
>fight club?

Ahah. No, not at all.

>> No.1825150

>>1825138
pride and prejudice

>> No.1825151

>>1825140
A young man receives a family heirloom he doesn't care for, but rather than re-gift he destroys it.

>> No.1825152

>>1825067
Jill?

>> No.1825155

>>1825138
No.
>>1825144
No.
>>1825135
Yes.

>> No.1825156

>>1825146
When someone mentions "Bitch" in the context of lit, I don't think of anyone else.

>U mad, Heathcliff?

>> No.1825159

>>1825150
Bingo.

>> No.1825160

>>1825152
Jesus Christ. Well done. I honestly didn't think anyone would get that.

>>1825151
This one IS LotR, then?

Here's another: a man has an absolutely hellish life in which everyone he cares about eventually dies, and he is horrifically persecuted purely because he gets on well with his dog.

>> No.1825161

>>1825155
See, told you it was the hobbit. The LOTR would be bunch of midgets and freaks decide to hike to a volcano one weekend - weird shit happens along the way.

>> No.1825162

A hipster debates getting off his ass and doing something.

>> No.1825163

>>1825162
Catcher in the Rye?

>> No.1825170

A family moves cause they are poor, some people die on the way.

>> No.1825171

>>1825170
Of Mice and Men?

>> No.1825177

>>1825163
try harder

you hipster

>> No.1825178

Old queen convinces sexy young man to do whatever he wants; people die - hilarity ensues.

>> No.1825179

>>1825162
hamlet

>> No.1825181

>>1825171
close, but no cigar.

>> No.1825184

>>1825170
Grapes of Wrath

>> No.1825186

a telegraph operator sticks his dick in a bunch of whores

>> No.1825196

>>1825184
spot on.

A bit harder: Weird shit goes down in Russia involving a troupe of dubious and comic characters.

>> No.1825198

Nubile and blonde aspiring dancer gets groomed by brilliant creep (stalker, borderline psychopath) at her workplace whilst is simultaneously courted by a rich playboy - whoever will she choose?

>> No.1825202

>>1825198
Was going for Bridget Jones' Diary till I re-read the first word.

>> No.1825203

>>1825186
Memories of my Melancholy Whores?

>> No.1825205

>>1825186
AW THAT ONE'S TRON FOR SURE

>> No.1825206
File: 375 KB, 520x602, master and the margarita.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825206

>>1825196
?

>> No.1825209

>>1825179
zing!

>> No.1825210

>>1825202
Lol.

Nope.

>> No.1825212

>>1825186
lol what is this one?

>> No.1825213

>>1825206
Yep.

Another one: Guy from Eastern Europe buys real-estate in England.

>> No.1825214

>>1825213
:3

>> No.1825216
File: 117 KB, 560x708, dracula.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825216

>>1825213
Nigga please...

>> No.1825222

>>1825198
No one?

>> No.1825225

>>1825216
Yeah, it was quite obvious.

I think this one will be impossible: A story about two wealthy families, a love triangle and a magical stone.

>> No.1825229

>>1825205
nope

>>1825212
hint: there is also an old man who can't catch his parrot

if you don't have it by now you haven't read it

it's also not generally included in the /lit/core canon, though he is a /lit/core author

>> No.1825230

A country girl makes it big as a fancy citified actress and screws up a couple guys lives.

>> No.1825232

>>1825198
>>1825222
>>1825196
i'm stumped

>> No.1825233

>>1825178
No guesses?

>> No.1825235

>>1825232
I'll give you a hint:
The blonde is swedish, the playboy is french, and the brilliant creep's only friend is a iranian policeman

o_O

>> No.1825238

>>1825178
>>1825233
macbeth?

>> No.1825239

A girl tries to kill herself after attempting to read Finnegans Wake.

>> No.1825241

>>1825178
Ring of Giyges?

>> No.1825242

>>1825186
>>1825186
>>1825186
>>1825186

Love In The Time of Cholera

>> No.1825244

>>1825238
Old "queen" aka 'old fruit/faggot'.

>> No.1825246

>>1825242
Swish!

>> No.1825250

>>1825235
i don't got it

>> No.1825274

le bumpette

>> No.1825284

>>1825274

>le

Get out.

>> No.1825295

>>1825250
Another hint:
The creep's in desperate need of some plastic surgery, and can write a tune or two.

>> No.1825301

A plumb intellectual confronts a world totally lacking in taste and decency and riddled with injustice.

i suck at these

>> No.1825321

A small girl dresses up as a ham.

>> No.1825323

Some mormons bite the dust when holidaying in London; their killer dies of heart complications soon after.

>> No.1825329

A guy goes to a place to write something then something bad happens.

>> No.1825340

>>1825116

yeah, nice get

>> No.1825343

>>1825131

tale of two cities

>> No.1825345

>>1825110
should have said greener pastures instead of new land

>> No.1825346

>>1825329
Bag of Bones by Stephen King?

>> No.1825347

>>1825321
To Kill a Mockingbird?

>> No.1825350

>>1825301

confederacy of dunces

>> No.1825354

Little kid is so smart all the other kids get jealous, then he kicks them in the fucckin balls!

>> No.1825355

>>1825329

secret window by stephen king?

>> No.1825357

>>1825329
the shining by stephen king?

>> No.1825361

>>1825329
anything by stephen king?

>> No.1825364
File: 68 KB, 746x800, Ender's Game.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825364

>>1825354
Nigga pureaaaase...

>> No.1825367
File: 53 KB, 533x288, FunnyBecauseItsTrue.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825367

>>1825361

>> No.1825375

Orphaned boy goes on a quest to defeat the Big Bad - he's accompanied by his elderly mentor.

>> No.1825383

This dude needs to kill some robots but he might be a robot. Also, solipsism.

>> No.1825388
File: 11 KB, 320x250, do androids dream of.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825388

>>1825383

>> No.1825397

>>1825347
Yep, well done.

>> No.1825433

>>1825343
Well done!

>>1825375
Gosh, this one isn't incredibly broad at all!

>> No.1825443

>>1825433
Yer don't actually bother with it, I was just fucking around.

>> No.1825446

A young boy reads to an old man, but the old man has another task he wants to boy to perform.

>> No.1825452

>>1825375
The first Robin Hobb - I can't remember what it's called.

Shut, this one's hard. It could be so many different books.

>> No.1825456

>>1825452
See
>>1825443

I did actually do the Robin Hobb books, here:
>>1825160

>> No.1825457

>>1825452
That's why I put it there; don't bother with it.

>> No.1825459

>>1825456
Get's on well with his dog, eh?

Just how 'well' are we talking here? (something one likely come across on /b?)

>> No.1825460

>>1825295
>>1825235
>>1825198
Nobody?

>> No.1825462

>>1825459
No. Argh. Look. In that very post that I linked, I said that it's the Robin Hobb series of books. Realm of the Elderlings or something. You know.

>> No.1825467

>>1825462
I've never read them, though bestiality might be why this creep I know goes on about them so much.

>> No.1825471

>>1825467
There's no bestiality. Essentially he can talk with animals. And share consciousness, to an extent.

I wouldn't bother with them; they have a great plot with some really interesting ideas, but they are so long and incredibly harrowing.

If you had to read any, just read the liveship traders trilogy.

>> No.1825477

>>1825471
This is good advice, but I thought the Tawny Man trilogy was just about worth the 200000-page intro. Probably. Maybe give it a try if you don't mind exposition.

>> No.1825480

>>1825477
Oh yeah, I read them all, and the Tawny Man had amazing moments. But Jesus Christ it's so depressing.

I thought the Liveships trilogy was the best for innovative ideas, likeable characters, and so on. Although no Fitz :(

>> No.1825484

>>1825471
>>1825477
>>1825480
Hmmm. I'll keep that in mind - I think I've actually got a copy of something of Hobb's somewhere around here...

What's the writing quality? Eddings level? Higher?

>> No.1825489

>>1825484
Dunno who Eddings is. I would say it was unnoticeable. You won't go wow, but you won't go ugh either.

>> No.1825493

>>1825489
Then probably higher than Eddings...
(he writes the kind of fantasy you read when you were younger, and, having since read the likes of Martin and Erikson, you can't ever return to them because they appear too childish.)

>> No.1825495

>>1825480

>No Fitz

Agreed, all of my why. Although he was a little bitch for loads of the Farseer trilogy, he was still a great character.

Also, [spoilers]Nighteyes.

>> No.1825496

Might be getting out of my depth here, cos I stopped enjoying fantasy when I was about sixteen. I tried Martin, I tried Feist, I tried Tolkein, I tried Jordan... no enjoyment any more. Shame, I loved me some fantasy when I was younger.

>>1825495
Tell me you didn't want to hug young Fitz and tell him everything would be okay. No-one. Ever. Did. This.

>> No.1825548

>>1825496
Ah well, nothing you can do really. Times change along with tastes. Read what you wanna read.

Also, I have to admit, yes. A part of me was hoping that by some miracle, Chivalry would save Fitz one of the numerous times he managed to get his life endangered. Poor old Fitz :(

Now, tell me you didn't want Fitz to falcon punch Starling in her bitch mouth - no-one can say she didn't deserve it.

>> No.1825560

a kid goes to school and kills a kid while winning a war

>> No.1825566

kid can't decide whether or not to kill his uncle, everybody dies

>> No.1825581

>>1825566
Hamlet.

>> No.1825624

>>1825119
Heart of darkness

>> No.1825637

A guy goes swimming in the sea. Then he meets a woman in a hotel. She dies. He goes into a field.

>> No.1825641

>>1825560
Ender's Game

>> No.1825646
File: 10 KB, 200x313, order-things-archaeology-human-sciences-michel-foucault-paperback-cover-art.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825646

The world is signs and then there's language, or something.

>> No.1825654

Two guys wait for someone they don't know exists in a place they aren't sure is right.

Oh wait, poorly?

>> No.1825655

A jackass brags about all the things he's killed, then dies.

>> No.1825664 [DELETED] 

A politician who once murdered some babies gets dick over by his wife and best friend

>> No.1825674

A politician who once murdered some babies gets dicked over by his wife and best friend

>> No.1825676

>>1825654
Waiting for Godot

>> No.1825680

A bromance gets totally ruined by some bitch because she can't take no for an answer. Also, bulls.

>> No.1825684

An old man suffering from dementia forces a kid to indulge in furry fetishes.

>> No.1825688

>>1825684
4chan: The Novel

>> No.1825696

>>1825688

No.

>> No.1825699

>>1825680
The Sun Also Rises

>> No.1825703

a guy chases another guy and catches that guy and then meets two people and cures one of schizophrenia and saves a town and then goes through weird places and then reaches his goal and then chases another guy and catches that guy and then meets two people and cures one of schizophrenia and saves a town and then goes through weird places and then reaches his goal and then chases (you get the idea.)

>> No.1825704

>>1825699

No.

>> No.1825711

A war profiteer and his buddies get lost.

>> No.1825714

A guy is conquering shit and people are working out the meaning of life.

>> No.1825719

>>1825704
Heh, But it fits.

>> No.1825728

A grizzled private detective postpones retirement for one last case.

>> No.1825730

White, male 8 year olds are misbehaving and not getting along and bullying each other until a white male sailor is like, "hey, quit it, let me take you back to your parents"

>> No.1825732

>>1825728
Dark Knight Returns?

>> No.1825733

>>1825728
that Jeff Bridges movie that just came out last year....Tron: Legacy?

>> No.1825734

>>1825711
catch 22

>>1825730
lord of the flies

>> No.1825737

>>1825728
no country for old men

>> No.1825741

>>1825734

No to the first one.

>> No.1825742

>>1825655
something by jack london?

>> No.1825743

>>1825733
but seriously; True Grit

>> No.1825745

>>1825742

Think older.

>> No.1825746

bunch of retards, bitch with big tits.

>> No.1825748

>>1825703
do I dignifiy this with an answer?
no, I'll let someone else

>> No.1825750

>>1825655
Catcher in the Rye with alternate ending

>> No.1825753

>>1825750
wait, that doesn't work at all
I feel the need to apologize for a dumb post
I misread it as "jackass brags and then dies"
totally missed the part about "things he's killed"

and, in that case, I'm assuming it's a biography of Ernest Hemmingway

>> No.1825754

>>1825753

Think older. Waaay older.

>> No.1825758

>>1825732
>>1825733
>>1825737
>>1825743
You're ALL right!

>> No.1825763

kid runs away and hunts and his dogs are killed by a mountain lion

>> No.1825764

>>1825763
now cry some manly tears while I leave you

>> No.1825868

>>1825763
how the green ferns grow

>> No.1825913

Man does something terrible because he thought he's a genius, turns out he ain't. Also, he's broke as hell.

>> No.1825914

>>1825913
Crime and Punishment

>> No.1825944

An estranged father and son travel around the USA.

...this sentence contains a spoiler.

>> No.1825953

>>1825944

Oh, I know this one...


...Brolita!

>> No.1825963

>>1825953
>>1825944
goddamnit you could've put tags around it

>> No.1825968

Some guy starts fucking a hot young woman, but then both of them wind up in a love triangle as they fall for an older man.

>> No.1825985

>>1825703
Damn, you best me to The Dark Tower. I was gonna go for a man goes on a journey and is accompanied by another man, a boy, a dog, and every token minority.

>> No.1825994

>>1825953
This made me laugh a lot.

>> No.1825995

this one guy is chased by an army and is nearly killed, and then twist ending comes

>> No.1825996

death is a pussy beta and has a nice ride

>> No.1825998

>>1825684
Whatever this is, I want to read it.

>> No.1826003

>>1825996
Soul Music?

>> No.1826010

A troublemaker comes to town off a boat and people start singing about him.

>> No.1826016

Clint Eastwood chases a nigger.

>> No.1826044

A guy journeys upriver to find a bunch of niggers and a dying man.

>> No.1826047

>>1826044
see >>1825119
>>1825122
>>1825125

>> No.1826060

>>1826047
Just saw it... that's what I get for only reading 95% of the thread ROFLOL!!!1

Another:
A man has the worst Thursday ever.

>> No.1826167

A really bad kid goes to jail, is forced to be good all the time, then is allowed to be bad again.

>> No.1826183

A guy is dead, then he's not. Nobody likes the dead guy.

>> No.1826193

>>1826060
Friday by Ice Cube

>> No.1826199

Everybody goes blind at once so it's RAEP TIME

>> No.1826204
File: 96 KB, 447x500, 1284512878385.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1826204

>>1826183

The Bible

>> No.1826209

>>1826167
Clockwork Orange

>> No.1826212

This big hairy guy chases a little boy down and shows the little boy the best time of his life.

>> No.1826214

Rich kid gets a job in his uncles factory, dates a white girl, then murders a black girl he knocked up. Busted.

>> No.1826225

>>1825998
>>1825688

But yeah, I want to read this shit too.

>> No.1826230

A feigns that he belongs to the upper class, hosts parties ends up getting murdered because of a fucking bitch.

>> No.1826231

>>1826230
>a feigns
Meant to say a man feigns... Fucking iPad.

>> No.1826237

>>1826231
>iPad

West Eggscum detected.

>> No.1826271
File: 90 KB, 386x381, pagan.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1826271

A budding composer reveals the faults of an ecclesiastical architecture.

>> No.1826283

an old man takes a boat ride

>> No.1826666

>>1826230
The Great Gatsby

>> No.1826684

This guy travels to some places like Africa and he's all mopey and stuff. He makes friends with this guy who kind of agrees with him and meets him different places but his friend's a first-class asshole.

>> No.1826695

>>1826016
the black man fled across the desert and the gunslinger followed?

can't remember the actual title

>> No.1826699

some bitch little kid complains to everyone taking care of him how terrible life is and how everyone sucks but him, gets lost in the city and almost dies until a teach rescues him

>> No.1826702

>>1826699
a la recherche du temps perdu

>> No.1826891

>>1825646
lol name of the rose

>> No.1826910

>>1826695
dark tower series.

>> No.1826914

>>1826702
it works but it wasn't the one i was thinking of

>> No.1826972
File: 26 KB, 366x480, Ulysses.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1826972

>>1826060