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/lit/ - Literature

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1824979 No.1824979 [Reply] [Original]

ITT: We remove, add or change a letter in any book title and post the plot of the story with that change.

Easy mode: Title can be in any language.
Alternative mode: Title in the original language.

I start:
Pigen som legede med ilden -> Pigen som legede med silden
The Girl who played with fire -> The girl who played with the herring

A young girl in post-modern Sweden goes about molesting a herring and gets imprisoned for making no sense.

Picture unrelated

>> No.1824981

no

>> No.1824983

Hmm... maybe?

All quiet on the western font

A man attempts to make a more western style of Kanji, his story of hardship in a world dominated by Arial and Helvetica. Also starring Cambria and Calibri.

>> No.1824984

for whom the bell trolls

Ernest Hemingway's take on the internet.

>> No.1824985

Alas shrugged

A man has a hard life and alas he shrugs.

>> No.1824986

>>1824983
The tale of the decline of organised religion in the west

>> No.1824987

The Cunt of Monte Cristo: a man is wrongfully imprisoned, and, after discovering a ridiculously large amount of money on a small isle in the Mediterranean, becomes an utter bastard and wreaks hellish revenge on his accusers.

Wait...

>> No.1824989

less, then zero

is a book about how much money I have at the end of each month

>> No.1824992

nineteen eighty foul
A roundup of all things foul related in 1980

>> No.1824995

The Old Man and the Bea

A weathered old man preserves his integrity throughout a long and arduous courtship of a Golden Girl.

>> No.1824996

>A Fame of thrones
Two celebrities battle to become kings of LA
>Clash of Pings
The two celebrities attempt to out rank the other in Counter-Strike using the fastest internet connection.
>A storm of words
The two celebrities move on to 4chan and tries to flame each other.
>A feast for crowds
The battle of the two celebrities is starting to gather media attention and almost ends up becoming a meme.
>A lance with dragons.
The two celebrities attempt to out-prank each other by ordering each other over 9000 dragon dildos. Then they realise that they have no career left and begins molesting small kids.

>> No.1824998

Night Club

as an escape from his shitty life, the protagonist creates an imaginary friend with whom they go to night clubs to pick up women together

the twist in the end?

WHO WAS THREESOME?

>> No.1825000

The Mountainhead

Told from the perspective of George Washington's head on Mount Rushmore.

>> No.1825003

Pride and Prejuice

A man and his pride... and his story of masturbating.

>> No.1825005

Fiddlesex

A nomadic Southern musician's adventures in sodomy

>> No.1825006

Infinite Cest

The story of the longest belt in the world

>> No.1825007

Latch Twenty Two

A man has twenty one latches, recounts them one day and finds one he didn't know existed.

>> No.1825010

Anne of Green Cables

A girl named Anne who insists that all her cables are green.

>> No.1825012

Lord of the Lies

A noble man discovers that everyone is lying when they talk about him. He uses this to his advantage.

>> No.1825013

>>1824989
>>1825003

Laughed.

>> No.1825014

Rave New World

Written in 2017

In a dystopia in which raving is the one only past time of the masses, a young man sets out to re introduce ballroom dancing to the world - but is ultimately crushed and killed by a metric ton of speed at a dance party. An allegory for the overwhelming anti intellectualism that ran rampant in the media, the majority of Earth's populace and popular culture in general at the time of the book's writing.

>> No.1825015

Topic of Cancer
An introductory book for the layman into the fascinating world of oncology!

>> No.1825016

Life of Pie

Mmm... delicious.

>> No.1825017

Brave Jew World

A slow-paced novel about survivors in a concentration camp

>> No.1825018

White Poise
A dramatization of a middle-class girl's transition into womanhood during Victorian England

>> No.1825019

Ender's Came

A six-year-old boy has his monitor removed, and, despite his status as a third child in a world where two is the legal maximum, his massive military potential leads him to be inducted into Battle School, where he expects to be trained for interstellar combat.

Instead, the School is in fact run by a raging pedophile, who introduces all the boys to the joys of sex, and they all have massive anti-gravity orgies.

You're now imagining Ender being sucked off by a grotesquely fat Anderson while Graff pounds him from behind.

>> No.1825021

The Frying of Lot 49
One day it got so hot that you could cook an egg on the pavement

>> No.1825023

The Dave in C code.

A software engineer unearths a disturbing, worldwide conspiracy hidden in the syntax of a popular programming language.

>> No.1825024

Had to add a space:

Ham Left

Shakespear wants dinner, unfortunately it just walked out on him.

>> No.1825025

>>1825019
Okay that sucked. I'll fix it for you.

Ender's Gate

An elderly Andrew Wiggins stares at a gate behind the safety of his window, ensuring that the neighborhood kids will not touch his garden.

>> No.1825026
File: 71 KB, 533x594, lolwut.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825026

>>1825024
>Shakespear wants dinner
>Shakespear wants
>Shakespear
>pear

>> No.1825027

>>1825023
I'm afraid I can't let you miss an opportunity to make a joke like this Dave.

>> No.1825029

>>1825026
Wants dinner; shakes pear.

microfiction thread

>> No.1825030

1284

Wynston Smythe, a lowly clerical worker, becomes suspicious of the King and his methods of governance. After he is found with a subversive parchment manuscript, he is promptly burned at the stake.

>> No.1825032

>>1825018

Hahaha

>> No.1825033

2001: A Pace Odyssey: using amazing future!technology, a man walks slowly and steadily to the moon, only to find evidence of a greater civilization there.

>> No.1825034

The Catcher in the Roe

A young man fantasizes about saving children from reaching adulthood by keeping them in his vat of fish eggs.

>> No.1825037

>>1825034
This was fantastic.

>> No.1825038

>>1825014

Shit, this actually sounds good. Maybe just a short story.

>> No.1825039

Finnegans Wank

No plot change

>> No.1825041

>>1825034
+1 for symbolism too

>> No.1825043

>>1825039

Lol, but you cheated.

>> No.1825048

Moby Duck

Captain Ahab seeks the "White Duck" that left him disfigured, depsite it being a Swan. Sub plot of the ugly duckling.

>> No.1825053

Gravity's Rainbot

Cyborg Pynchon makes in rain on dem hoes

>> No.1825054

In Old Blood

Truman Capote's riveting true-crime tale of Jack Kevorkian and his poison-dispensing Thanatrons.

>> No.1825057

Ro Benson Crusoe

A man is left stranded on a Greek Island and takes up smoking.

>> No.1825058

The Kingdom of Bod is Within You

Tolstoy's workout-and-nutrition manifesto. 45 min, VHS.

>> No.1825059

Mo Country for Old Men

A group of wizened old black men in a bar demanding more Johnny Cash are instead unexpectedly killed by a man with a silenced shotgun.

>> No.1825063

>>1825015
>>>1825000
>>1824992
>1824989

Niiiiiiice.

>>1825037
>>1825041

Thanks

>> No.1825066
File: 17 KB, 250x296, 1264721542907.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825066

>>1825059

>shotgun

>> No.1825068

Waiting for the Barbarian

John Milius's memoir of difficulties with a prima donna Arnold on the set of Conan.

>> No.1825069

Brideshed Revisited

A preacher kidnaps women, "marries" them, and keeps them locked up in a shed for years.

>> No.1825070

Mein Dampf

Autobiography detailing the perceived problems of damp and vapour.

>> No.1825072

>>1825066
I've only seen the film. Dislike McCarthy's pretentious lack of proper punctuation, but that's not a matter for this thread. I'm enjoying it, so let's not derail, eh?

>> No.1825074

Northern Fights

A piece of investigative journalism tackling the growing problem of football hooliganism in the north of England.

>> No.1825077

Ulsses

Day in the life of Dedalus [sic], a dyslexic who feels useless.

>> No.1825080

>>1825066
I don't get how this is related to Elliott Smith

>> No.1825081

>>1825072

It's just quotes and apostrophes in contractions, man. WANT...TO...DERAIL

>> No.1825083

>>1824992
How has this title never been used on Monsterpiece Theater?

>> No.1825084

>>1825074
Yes.

Dill.
A young man wins a scholarship at Oxford, and to amuse himself and win the affection of his dickish room-mate, he makes up a perfect herb which accompanies fish dishes wonderfully. He is startled to later find it being grown in his room-mate's friend's garden.

>> No.1825087

>>1825074
Surface Retail

A story set in the world of the retail industry. Protagonist is a 20-something male with Elephantiasis, who finds it hard to progress within his job due to his deformity.

>> No.1825090

>>1825081
Thread for it >>1824518

>> No.1825092

>>1825087
Stranger in a Strange Band

David Gilmour's memoirs.

>> No.1825094

>>1825069

Hahaha.

The Autobiography of Malcolm A

Upon turning 50, an Ohio accountant dictates his memoirs to his also-utterly-ordinary friend.

>> No.1825098

Hairy Potter

A shitty book series for children about a very hairy man who made a living making cups, until he is told by an equally hairy man that he is a wizard.

>> No.1825103

Hearth of Darkness

Joseph Conrad's historical fiction describing labour practices in the late 19th century. Inspired by William Blake's "The Chimney Sweeper".

>> No.1825107

Grounding for the Metaphyics of Morays

Kant argues that while certain eels are the most terrifying conceivable creatures, we can not infer from that definition alone that they exist.

>> No.1825111
File: 105 KB, 347x346, thumbs_up_rip.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825111

>>1825103
>>1825092

>> No.1825191

Of Mice And Men is anagrammed into

Deaf Mnemonic

The story of a hearing impaired person with a terrible memory...umm...that becomes president of a country of blind people, yeah. Hilarity ensues!

>> No.1825199

>>1825191
Oh, ok just *one* letter, then

Of Lice and Men

The story of an evolutionary leap in a parasite that results in mental retardation of most of humanity.

>> No.1825218

>>1825199
Of Mice and Ven
A collection of short stories about a day in the life of illiterate van-dwelling mice.

>> No.1825247

Wuthering Weights

A bunch of fat bastards get caught up in some drama out on the moors.

>> No.1825251

Suns and Lovers

A guy falls in love with a couple of women at the time that the sun has gotten big enough to burn Earth to a crisp. Sadness ensues.

>> No.1825259

>>1825251
>A guy falls in love with a couple of women
>implying possibility
this guy does not know about true love~

>> No.1825260
File: 298 KB, 308x501, Capture sdoiufh.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825260

Totes From Underground

Some sad bastard obsesses over getting really cool bags that no one else has.

>> No.1825263

>>1825259
You don't know about my boy DH.
'sides. I'm in love with like 5 or 6 women at this moment.

>> No.1825271

>>1825263
yea and this is why you'll never succeed.

>> No.1825276

Faith in Cakes: Travels in Hyperreality

Same thing but with more cakes.

>> No.1825277

>>1825271
>you'll never succeed
in which capacity?

>> No.1825286

>>1825271
Actually he'll never succeed because he's a cueball

>> No.1825303

>>1825286
aaawwww maaaannnnnnnn

Hatership Down

A spaceship full of haters crash lands on a lonely, backwater planet and starts hatin' on the populace.

>> No.1825314

>>1825286
that too

>> No.1825318

Manimal Farm

Dr Jonathan Chase, a shape-shifting man who possessed the ability to turn himself into any animal he chose, starts up a minor communal society with a bunch of other manimals. Filled with symbolism and stuff

>> No.1825324

>>1825218
illiterate van dwelling *stoner* mice maybe

>>1825303
Like this a lot!

>> No.1825341

The Betamorphosis

A man becomes minor character on Jersey Shore. The rest of the book is pretty similar to the original; it involves the sub-human protagonist eating shit and dying

>> No.1825358

>the pun also rises

members from a board called /lit/ try to one-up eachother with senseless quips while real problems exist elsewhere.

>> No.1825372

>>1825358
The Whining

A horror in which a young underage b& goes on /lit/ and whines about people making harmless not to mention hilarious puns while 'real' problems exist elsewhere, like his mum telling him to clean his room. FUCK YOU, MUM, I WON'T DO WHAT YOU TELL ME!!!

>> No.1825377

>>1825314
You never answered my question you fat slut.

>> No.1825378
File: 101 KB, 595x483, u-mad-cuz-im-stylin-on-u.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825378

>>1825372
can't take a joke, anon?

>> No.1825382

>>1825378
I don't think you understood the nature of this post. You penis.

>> No.1825387
File: 10 KB, 200x160, u made.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825387

>>1825382
i don't think you understand the nature of mine. you nipple.

>> No.1825393

>>1825377
really. hopeless.

>> No.1825395

Laughter House Five

The story of a man who is abducted by aliens after his stand up comedy routine bombs with the audience.

>> No.1825396

>>1825387
But the post I was referring to wasn't a joke. You anatomy part

>> No.1825412
File: 39 KB, 441x408, 1288186285170.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1825412

>>1825393
nuh uh

>> No.1825414

>>1825412
committing any sort of hope to an avatar of cruelty like me is just self torment. i'd rather not crush your little heart

>> No.1825423

>>1825414
but if you're an avatar of cruelty, isn't that exactly what you'd want?

I know wut u want, gurl.
I'll likely be flying over you soon on my way home, assuming you live on the west coast with all the other dykes. U want I should parachute down and drop off some dick in ur drawers?

>> No.1825429
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1825429

>>1825423
actually i'll be in chengdu to see a friend pretty soon. not going to tell you where though teehee

>> No.1825435

>>1825429
>implying I live in Chengdu
>implying I don't know the place well enough to know where all the 外国人 are anyway.

I'll be waiting for you at Pete's Tex Mex.

>> No.1825436

>>1825435
so silly

>> No.1825447

>>1825436
>>1825436
Silly will be when I drown you in a margarita and then proceed to drink from that same margarita.

>Vdubby held her face down in the drink and her struggles became less frantic, taking on a sluggish manner. The little rolls of flesh which accumulated just above her elbows stopped quivering and she lay still. He pushed her body down on the floor and wiped his hands on a nearby serape. Taking a sip from the drink, he looked down and noticed the snot which had seeped from her right nostril at some point near her death. "fucking gross" he muttered, and stepping over her body yelled "Fuyar! Maidan!"

>> No.1825449

>>1825447
Is this the start of your next submission to TAR?

>> No.1825451

>>1825449
It is now.

>> No.1825499

>>1825447
not imaginative enough to impress me.

>> No.1825500

On the Toad
Gratuitous bestiality erotica featuring amphibians.

Vlysses
One letter better than Ulysses.

The Bovine Comedy
Big cows journey into hell. Hilarity ensues.

>> No.1825561

>>1825499
Well if it helps, in the unabridged version you're a slytherin and I'm a hufflepuff.

>> No.1825565

>>1825561
Another My immortal in the making!

>> No.1825572

>>1825191

Uncle Tom's Cabin = Cocaine Stumblin'

The episodic tale of a drug-addicted slave wandering around Southern wildernesses in search of a fix.

>> No.1825596

Why are all the trips here insufferable faggots

>> No.1825613

>>1825596
'cause you're so jelly.

>>1825565
I have big hopes for this one, yes.

>> No.1825627

If on a winter's night a Graveler...

You are about to set out on an adventure after receiving your starting Pokemon. You will encounter fraud, conspiracy etc etc.

>> No.1825634

the aspy who came in from the cold

Curious incident of the dog in the night time meets cold war thriller.

>> No.1825639

>>1825561
hm, but i'm a ravenclaw

>> No.1825644

>>1825639
No, Malfoy.

>> No.1825693

>>1825639
I knew you'd say that.
I effing knew it.
I effing knew you'd say that.

>> No.1825710

>>1825627
This post has totally been done before

>> No.1825739

>>1825644
that's more d&e
>>1825693
good

>> No.1825909

>>1825739
What about the rest of the cast?

>> No.1825938

>>1825909
idk, i don't follow harry potter all that closely
BUT this reminds me where is arcueid and my luna fanfic

>> No.1825946

>>1825938
>arcueid
What kind of pokemon is that?

>> No.1825949

>>1825938
are all tripfags on /lit/ into writing Harry potter fanfics? Then there is no hope for them.

>> No.1825967

Shite Teeth

British immigrants realise the truth behind the native's bad teeth stereotype.

>> No.1826030

The Jungle Mook

A soldier is separated from his unit in the Vietnam war and survives only with the help of some talking animals.

>> No.1826056

Vårnatt -> Vår natt
Spring night -> Our night

(T. Vesaas)

>> No.1826062

Et dukkehjem -> Et drukkehjem
A doll's house -> Eat drunkhome

(Ibsen)