/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.18119530]

How do I live the /lit/ lifestyle?

[Anonymous No.18119532]

if you mean a literary lifestyle rather than /lit/, well for starters you stop going on /lit/...

[Anonymous No.18119537]

>>18119530
Play videogames for 12 hours then guilt yourself into reading 2 pages a philosophy everyday.

[Anonymous No.18119544]

>>18119530
/lit/ lifestyle:
Don't read books, just post on /lit/.

[Anonymous No.18119556]

bro just read a book

[Anonymous No.18119567]

>>18119537
This is right

[Anonymous No.18119576]

Someone fed the biographies of 100 great writers into a neural net and this is what it recommended:

>Age 0-7
Be born into an aristocratic (but decaying - see later) family who recognize your precocious genius and hire the best classical tutor.

>Age 8
Have your world turned upside-down when your father's gambling debts suddenly leave your family bankrupt. See your beloved pony led away to the knackers, your saintly mother forced to take in laundry, etc. This experience will give you a life-long suppressed rage and hatred of USURY.

>Age 9-15
Work a succession of menial jobs to support your crippled younger sister while reading the entire Western Canon by candle-light and honing your craft.

>Age 16-17
Round about here you need to develop a taste for alcohol and/or opiates and father two or three illegitimate children

>Age 18-19
Run away and fight in the Spanish Civil War, on the Commie side (if you want to be favourably reviewed by the New York Times) or the Fascist side (if you want to be admired on /pol/). If the Spanish Civil War is not going on when you're 18, reasonable substitutions are permissible, but you'll need to see comrades die and take a non-lethal bullet yourself to stock up on life experience.

>Age 20-23
Here's where you should embark on a passionate affair with a wealthy titled Eastern-European lady who finances your writing and globe-trotting, self-destructive lifestyle. If you're a poet you need to die towards the end of this period, and be sure to time it just right - leave enough to guarantee immortality but little enough to tantalize the world with what-might-have-been.

>Age 24-30
If you're writing novels it's OK to see out your twentices, although it's recommended that after your first novel ("a shocking, blasphemous masterpiece") wows the literary world, you disappear completely and live as a recluse for five years, visited only by crazed, nymphomaniac female fans.

>Age 31
Suicide is and always will be the /lit/ death of choice, but that still gives you a lot of leeway. The important thing is not to seem derivative. A spectacular on-camera seppuku to protest your country's abandonment of the Gold Standard, for example, is probably out. A senseless bar fight in one of the shadier areas of Bangkok, as always, has much to recommend it.

[Anonymous No.18119624]

>>18119576
Incredible

[Anonymous No.18119631]

Book next to toilet

[I hate women No.18119646]

>>18119537
acccurate

[Anonymous No.18119657]

Read and post on /lit/. Being a NEET is optional and recommend, but not required