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/lit/ - Literature

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16693212 No.16693212 [Reply] [Original]

>Abused as a child
>Developed a submissive and timid personality with low self-esteem and self-loathing qualities
>Long term depression, social anxiety, complex trauma disorder
>Don't really care about life, feel it's something to be coped with rather than enjoyed, everyday is a chore

Any books that you can recommend me? I know therapy before you say but it's not really an option at the moment but I will try at some point. I just need something I can relate to.

Someone recommended me Dostoevsky, so i'm going to get C&P, Notes from the Underground, and Brothers Karamazov.

>> No.16693218

The Transcendentalists. Don’t wallow in self pity. It’s not good for you

>> No.16693228

Hang yourself, don't be a burden to whoever is taking care of you right now, but not before reading The Feast of the Goat.

>> No.16693243

Legit I would suggest reading Healing the Fragmented Selves of Trauma Survivors: Overcoming Internal Self-Alienation.

>> No.16693250

>>16693218
Will check them out, thanks. I do try.

>>16693228
Nobody is taking care of me, I live alone. Will look at the book.

>> No.16693275

The Gay Science. Take the Dionysian pessimism pill

>> No.16693285

>>16693243
Thank you.

>>16693275
Yes, I forgot, someone said Nietzsche, I have the Basic Writings and Portable Nietzsche coming, one of them contains that.

>> No.16693637

Bump before I go to sleep, thanks in advance if anyone recs a book.

>> No.16694206

>>16693637
I'm somehow like you anon, I was abused too and developed a shy personality. I'd say that started with the Greeks and reading Montaigne my life has improved. Good luck anon, I really wish you well.

>> No.16694217
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16694217

>>16693212
Philosophy was the original Self-Help and Epicurus did it to perfection.
Good luck healing, anon.
https://youtu.be/hBWDIzHldPg

>> No.16694218

>>16694206
seconding montaigne! he is like a friend

>> No.16694224

>>16694217
Definitely don't read this guy's recommendations! He's recommending you crazy people! Read Stoics, read Greeks, do not read Nietzsche and Stirner!

>> No.16694231

>>16694224
Op appears to be ahead of me on reading Nietzsche. Stoics may be of some help on how to go about a numb life of cope, but how do they douse out anxiety again? Endurance?
Naw. Go away, anon.

>> No.16694279

>>16694231
>how do they douse out anxiety again? Endurance?
Yes. Stoicism gives you a certain inner peace. With this inner peace, you are able to put yourself in difficult situations. You will lose your temper, but you will learn to deal with that, too. With time, your anxiety will decrease. Though some problems cannot be solved, stoicism will teach you to accept them as parts of your life. It's very simple and common knowledge – dad wisdom.

>> No.16694562

>>16694470
I should add "inspiration to improve yourself and treat yourself better and show you that life can be beautiful and fulfilling and not just a chore or something to be numbed with hedonism that will only cause more problems in the long term"

>> No.16694341

>>16694231
>anxiety
Literally meaningless. Do you mean the emotion? Because Stoics (as Nussbaum explains quite well in "Therapy of Desire") rejected the modern conception of emotion. That's why they were so good. All the nonsense platitudes which perpetuate the mentally ill's problems are completely dismantled by the stoics. Reading more is always good!

>> No.16694371

>>16694279
>a certain inner peace.
Ataraxia is rather peaceful too.
I used to push my anxiety down, but it would always come back. Now things that should really bother me just don’t.

>>16694341
Worry to full blown panic attacks. The Vulcan method of life seemed interesting to me when I was younger and watched a lot of Star Trek, but it probably isn’t healthy to hold it all inside, denying it’s there.

>> No.16694394

>>16694371
>Worry to full blown panic attacks
You know what that is? Assertions. A group of assertions which are brought about because you don't know the reasons why they're wrong. "Anxiety" is not a neurological condition. No studies have ever shown a clear reason for it. It's just a group of beliefs, similar to sadness.
>Vulcan, holding it inside
I guess this is the part of the thread where Butterfly reveals her lack of erudition? Stoics don't say, "Don't feel emotion," they instead say, "recognize emotion as a group of assertions. Figure out how to refute those assertions/accept what part of those assertions are true." The statement, "You have done a great amount of evil," from a non-Stoic perspective, is something that can lead to a panic attack. From a Stoic perspective, however, you can assert in response, "So I have. So, I shall do a great amount of good in the future." Indeed, your conception of "living with" your anxiety might be more similar to stoicism than you think.

>> No.16694470
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16694470

you have the awareness of your submissive and timid personality with low self-esteem and self-loathing qualities and the problems it causes, so you should simply make it your long term goal to become stronger and more confident and go from there. you can start working towards that goal by doing things like working out, and making sure you take better care of yourself, practice good hygene, form more positive habits and work on elimating bad ones (remember its ok to start small and work your way up with this, forming good habits is like working out a muscle, consistency is key and you wont benifit from biting off more than you can chew, and if you fail, try to learn from your experience, find forgiveness, and get back in the saddle instead of obsessing over it and beating yourself up)

ive only read brothers k out of those books and i dont think it will help at all with this predicament, but its really good so you should get it anyway. to be perfectly blunt, no amount of meme self help reading is going to help you here, only setting and working towards tangible goals that address your problems will do that, you cant read yourself into self confidence. at best you might benefit from ideological philosophy like national socialism that preaches things like the importance of self respect which might give you profound inspiration to improve yourself and treat yourself better

also, remember, we are all gonna make it

>> No.16695002

>>16693212
I'd recommend a bunch of self improvement books aimed at tackling those individual problems and a elaborate plan of action aimed at behavioral change.

>> No.16695283

>>16693212
The Bible

>> No.16695323

Nietzsche is good to break out of weakness and timidity. Don't take his philosophical ideas too seriously though and don't stop with him, move on to the Greeks. Read Goethe if you need a father figure.

>> No.16695336

>>16693212
the courage to be disliked, so you can stop being such a victim about your past circumstances stances and trauma

>> No.16695417

>>16693212
The Prophet by Gibran

>> No.16695460

>>16693212
I highly recommend the stoics. Especially Epictetus. Some of my own advice is to just take everything with good humour. Even when attacked by others or facing bad situations I like to make some comedy or of it. Either a verbalised quip or just a thought. It helps me cope with the worst people in my life and enjoy moments better with the best. It's good to remember the absurdity of life and pessimism has helped me come to peace with most things so look into Camus and maybe Ligotti. Also 12 rules of life is actually useful. Give it a go.

>> No.16695471

>>16693212
What kind of abuse? Did you turn into a faggot? In that case just kys, otherwise read fantasy, ya, coming of age stuff for that escapism.

>> No.16696225

>>16693212
Toxic parents by Susan Forward

>> No.16696248

>>16695460
>>16694394
>>16694279
>>16694231
Don't listen to these.
Stoicism is for insensitive people who are okay with being insensitive.
Not only that but stoicism doesn't work for people who have been neglected as children, because that results in emotional instability and a yearning fo validation. Stoicism would tell you your needs are invalid/wrong/distractions, thus tricking you into continuing the circle of abusive neglect you received from your parents/caretakers.

Stoicism is abusive, reject it completely and read Alice Miller instead. Also >>16696225 this is a genius read.

>> No.16696259

OP here, didn't expect the thread to still be up, thanks for the all the books.

I know books won't give me self confidence, I just wanted something I could relate to or help me in some way. I don't have anyone in my life right now so it's hard but i'm getting there. I have started working out using calisthenics Youtubers as a guide, and i'm slowly improving my diet.

My book list:
>Healing the Fragmented Selves of Trauma Survivors
>Nietzsche, Basic writings and Colleced Portable
>Dostoevsky C&P, Notes, Karamazov
>Montaignes Collected Essays
>Aristotle Nicomachean Ethics
>Essential Epicurus
>Epictetus Discourses and Selected Writings
>Aurelius Meditations
>Seneca Letters and On the Shortness of Life
>The Courage to be Disliked
>Gibran The Prophet
>Camus The Myth of Sisyphus

Thanks for all your help.

>> No.16696275

Try the Existentialist pill.
Sartre says somewhere that it doesn't matter what happened to us previously, and what really matters is what we are going to do with it now. While I've read some Sartre, I haven't seen this one myself and thus come out as a pseud. I was told this by an acquaintance of mine. I guess its from Being and Nothingness. Yeah, Dostoevsky is a good read. Besides Nietzsche and other authors /lit/anons recommend, I'd also say Cioran might a good read, for I find his seemingly depressive writings surprisingly enliving.

>> No.16696281

>>16696225
>>16696248
I will add Alice Miller and the Toxic Parents books, they sound. I will keep in mind what you say about stoicism, I will read the Toxic Parents and Miller first and then see.

Forgot to add here >>16696259 i'm also getting The Essential Goethe.

>> No.16696288

>>16696275
>Try the Existentialist pill.
Dont, its gay.