/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.16649727]

>eating at Panda Express with my roommate on our college campus
>all of a sudden there's this really loud noise behind us
>we turn around
>some weird creepy loner had just slammed shut as hard as he possibly could his edition of the Winds of Winter
>now that he has everyone's attention he loudly announces to everyone staring at him
>"Ah yes! I have just finished this wonderful mighty tome!"
>this creep catches my eye
>oh god no
>it's was like when the crazy schizo homeless guy on the subway catches your eye and then approaches you
>this incel won't stop staring at me
>I tell this fucking loser "Congratulations. Hope you enjoyed the book."
>"Ah yes! It truly was a mighty and adventurous tome! A true feat of readership to have finished such a ponderous and weighty tome!"
>I turn back around and promptly ignore this lonely fucking doucher
>my roommate says "Wait do you know that guy?"
>I tell him I've never seen him before in my life
>we finish our meal
>as we're leaving we see the Game of Thrones retard longboarding down the street, off into the sunset
Turns out this kid was a "high-functioning" autist. Had a film class with him a few years later. He was annoying as shit and wouldn't shut the fuck up. He had the most midwit tastes and would act super fucking smug about all his shitty takes. The dude never thought he could be wrong, and always talked in this faux academic voice. He also had disgusting greasy long hair and would wear fingerless gloves. God I hated this little shit.

[Anonymous No.16649745]

Autists generally were never even raised by parents and that is whu they behave that way, they are not actually on the spectrum at all.

Get mad at the parents, that poor kid has never had a friend or parental guidance in his life and has survived solely off the world inside his own head.

[Anonymous No.16649748]

based kid
fuck you OP

[Anonymous No.16649749]

>>16649727
>Winds of Winter
Why are fantasy titles so fucking trash

[Anonymous No.16649757]

>>16649727
>/lit/ user complaining about the personification of /lit/

[Anonymous No.16649759]

>>16649748
Nothing about it was bases you peabrained contrarian. It was cringe as hell. Do you really think it is based to sit in a crowded cafeteria, slam your book shut as hard as you can for forced dramatic effect, and then shout out "I JUST FINISHED THIS MIGHT TOME"?
You're a fucking loser and deserve your friendless permavirgin status if you think these actions are "based".

[Anonymous No.16649760]

>>16649757
Speak for yourself.

[Anonymous No.16649767]

>>16649727
>eating at Panda Express with my roommate on our college campus
>all of a sudden there's this really loud brap behind us
>we turn around
>massive river of diarrheal shit (previously Panda Express) squirting out our backsides
>we highfive and kiss passionately

[Anonymous No.16649770]

>>16649760
t. low-functioning autist

[Anonymous No.16649771]

>>16649767
t. triggered chink that American chinese food is better than real chink shit

[Anonymous No.16649776]

>>16649770
>because I am a midwit who pretends to read on this board, and only occassionally read, but when I do it's always lowbrow genre trash or something off the free section on my kindle, then everyone else on /lit/ must be like me too

[Anonymous No.16649777]

>>16649745
>survived solely off the world inside his own head
Imagine having such a barren internal world that you need to search this desperately for external things to fill it with.

[Anonymous No.16649779]

>>16649771
>triggered chink that American chinese food
are burgers technically ESL?

[Anonymous No.16649802]

>>16649749
Name of the Wind is a good name, tbqh

[Anonymous No.16649812]

>>16649759
sounds fucking hilarious and based as hell.

[Anonymous No.16649818]

>>16649812
Go do this in public then retard. You won't. Because surely if it is so based it would get you pussy? I mean how could such a based act not result in pussy?

[Anonymous No.16649826]

>>16649818
I used to do this when I was in school and I was waist deep in pussy.

[Anonymous No.16649828]

>>16649818
lol

[Anonymous No.16649829]

>>16649818
>based = getting you pussy
you're so cringy and you don't even know it normie

[Anonymous No.16649832]

>>16649826
No you didn't. You never seen a vagina in your life.

[Anonymous No.16649835]

>>16649829
>he thinks normie is an insult on /lit/
This isn't /r9k/ incel. You're cringe.

[Anonymous No.16649850]

>sitting in Panda Express
>it's been 4 hours since I got here
>can't leave because reading Winds of Winter
>powering through the last 20 pages of dense text
>cafeteria staff start giving me glances
>finally finish the fantasy novel
>it got boring but pretend to myself I enjoyed it
>or else why did I waste a month of my life?
>decide to make the moment memorable
>slam the book shut and stand up
>chest and head held high
>good, everyone's attention acquired
>proudly pronounce my feat in a strong manly voice
>expect everyone to congratulate me
>like my mom used to do
>when I told her I finished a whole book
>no response from the other patrons
>seems like they didn't understand what I said
>I look around and lock eyes with a fellow intellectual
>I can measure intellect from a distance at first sight
>it comes with being an intellectual
>I come over with strong strides and straight back
>repeat my glorious feat to this fellow literal brother
>he understands and praises me
>then he's the first to break eye contact
>he lowers his head and looks down at his food
>it's how the inferior show submission to their superiors
>Good
>I am euphoric
>I proceed to leave the safety of the cafeteria
>and go forth to impose my will onto the world
>now that I have grown stronger from my literal feat

[Anonymous No.16649852]

>>16649727
Hey OP, that's a really cool blog post made there!

[Anonymous No.16649861]

>>16649850
>it's been 4 hours since I got here
>my feet hurt
FTFY

[Anonymous No.16649866]

>>16649852
t. loves Londonfrog posts

[Anonymous No.16649872]

>>16649727
>Turns out this kid was a "high-functioning" autist
And here you are, writing your diary online, so other people can mock you
Now which of you two is the saddest?

[Anonymous No.16649874]

>>16649872
Most arguably the loser who thinks he is special for reading a book

[Anonymous No.16649900]

>>16649727
Wait, Winds of Winter is out?

[Anonymous No.16649928]

>>16649727
Heh, catch you later

[Anonymous No.16649931]

>>16649818
You need to take your meds.

[Anonymous No.16649936]

>>16649866
Londonfrog is better than this whiny, seething faggot of an OP

[Anonymous No.16649949]

>>16649727
He seems cool and punk rock meanwhile you and your gay roomate who you probably jerk off are the consumerist normies of your epic tale

[Anonymous No.16649978]

>>16649727
I took an anime film study class in undergrad and the number of people in it who fit this exact description is astounding. Whenever something funny happened there was a group of dudes who would go out of their way to laugh as hard as possible.

[Anonymous No.16649982]

>>16649874
>Being too stuck-up to get self-irony
Nah, bud

[Anonymous No.16649996]

>>16649978
>who would go out of their way to laugh as hard as possible
As opposed to those going out of your way to belittle people with obvious handicaps to feel better about themselves?
The embarrassing laughers are still the better

[Anonymous No.16650038]

Why is 4chan usually biased against the storyteller in situations like these?

[Anonymous No.16650066]

>>16649727
So the whole point of this is to see if we know Winds of Winter hasn't been released yet? Weird.

[Anonymous No.16650079]

Extremely based kid, cringe af OP

[Anonymous No.16650083]

>>16649978
>anime film study class
You wot m8

[Anonymous No.16650091]

>>16649759
Do you even know what based means? You delusional retard.

[Anonymous No.16650105]

This is the sort of high-quality posting that I come to /lit/ for, well done everyone

[Anonymous No.16650114]

>>16650038
Because 4chan users are a combination the kid in the cafeteria and the storyteller himself. OP is telling a 'cringe' tale of a foolish/bizarre person, and it comes off as a failed normie attempting to belittle and demean the few pathetic individuals that fall below him on the socio-sexual hierarchy.
4chan is composed of Gamma Males.

[Anonymous No.16650126]

OP is literally this meme.

[Anonymous No.16650130]

>>16649777
Cope

[Anonymous No.16650149]

>eating at Panda Express by myself, having asked several qts to leave when they tried to sit beside me
>reading the final chapter of George R.R. Martin's The Winds of Winter, don't want to be distracted by the admittedly beautiful girls
>finish the final paragraph
>the beauty is so overwhelming I have to read it again
>gently close the volume and lay it down on the plastic table
>notice that two normies are pointing at me and giggling as they stuff themselves full of greasy Chinese food
>wondering what I have done to draw their attention, I realize that these poor benighted souls have probably never finished a book since middle school nor read in public
>"Yes, I did just finish this," I say kindly. "It was wonderful and I highly recommend it."
>one of the normies catches my eye
>unsure of what to do, I take a few steps closer to him, hoping to find out why my reading habits are a source of such fascination
>"Congratulations! Hope you enjoyed the book!" he says snidely
>this response confuses me, since I clearly said before that the book was wonderful, but to be polite I tell him explicitly that I enjoyed it. He probably doesn't have the vocabulary to understand what I was saying before
>just to mess with him a bit, I use the phrase "ponderous tome," just barely hiding my smirk
>he turns around, apparently unable to think of anything more to say
>I hear them snickering as I exit the restaurant, but soon their moronic laughter is drowned out by the approaching pitter patter of feminine feet
>"anon, what did you think of the ending?" the lovely girl asks breathlessly, her rather large chest barely contained by her tight blue sweater. We're in a lit class together and I'd been waiting to ask her out until I finished the book, wanting to concentrate on Martin's words and not her charms
>"I particularly enjoyed the details of King Stannis's excise taxes on Essosi wine" I began, knowing she'd be in my bed before nightfall

[Anonymous No.16650161]

>>16650038
Because A. writing online about a story so you feel good about yourself is suspect and
B. What's the harm of sharing in the book reader's joy? So he's not acting according to social norms and is imposing on your personal space a bit, boo hoo. Those kind of events are fate throwing you an interesting bone here and there.

[Anonymous No.16650165]

>>16650149
>"I particularly enjoyed the details of King Stannis's excise taxes on Essosi wine"
Based.

[Anonymous No.16650189]

I can only imagine how much of a little faggot you are.

[Anonymous No.16650191]

>>16649818
Women arent based

[Anonymous No.16650195]

>>16650149
Based

[Anonymous No.16650196]

>>16649818
I wish I was that Based. I draw the line at causing scenes, hard for me.

[Anonymous No.16650200]

since were in a blogpost anyhow, anyone else feeling that 4chan is much more comfy with the new shitpost ads?

[Anonymous No.16650215]

>>16650083
Is it so surprising?
https://www.filmandmedia.ucsb.edu/course/japanese-anime/

[Anonymous No.16650234]

>>16650114
>>16650161
I'm not talking about this particular situation, I noticed a general pattern here. When someone shares his hardships involving another person there's always posters flipping it around, defending the people of the story while attacking anon, be it their ex, their teacher etc

[Anonymous No.16650241]

>>16650234
because it's funny

[Anonymous No.16650292]

>>16650234
I answered your damn question and then you answered it yourself

[Anonymous No.16650343]

>>16650234
Because the 'hardships' are almost always either completely fictional, heavily edited to be more sympathetic, or else the poster is genuinely in the wrong

[Anonymous No.16650363]

>>16650241
>>16650292
So we all agree that the kid in OP's story is cringe, but we're just pretending he is based for "le epic maymay"?

[Anonymous No.16650382]

>>16650363
why can't he be both?

[Anonymous No.16650397]

>>16650234
People who make threads on 4chan about their experiences are without exception unreliable narrators. It's good mental hygiene to consider the recounted events from an alternate perspective

[Anonymous No.16650513]

>>16650397
This. Half of these guys are some regular Humberts.. he he

[Anonymous No.16650658]

>>16650149
OP BTFO

[Anonymous No.16650682]

>>16650513
>regular Humberts
kek

[Anonymous No.16650829]

>>16650149
can I base my life off this based?

[Anonymous No.16650911]

>>16650658
OP has yet to have been BTFO.

[Anonymous No.16650925]

>>16650149
Not even close to how it happened nor what the dude sounded like. Skip to 0:46 in this video. https://youtu.be/HXqiM6kosEY
That's how the dude was talking.

[Anonymous No.16650982]

>>16650925
cope

[Anonymous No.16651000]

>>16650513
BIG BOOBA

[Anonymous No.16651003]

>>16650363
cringe = doing something that is 'wrong' by social norms.
based = having no regard to social norms.
So yes, the kid is based, and if you were spineless enough to let the base cringe reaction dictate your responses, he would also be cringe.

[Anonymous No.16651022]

>>16650363
Autist leave!

[Anonymous No.16651024]

>>16650982
Yes, it's a cope on your part. Glad we agree

[Anonymous No.16651030]

>>16651024
stay coping

[Anonymous No.16651035]

ITT: Mongoloids falling for the smelliest bait ever.
You know Winds of Winter hasn't been published yet, right

[Anonymous No.16651495]

>>16651035
>
>>16650066

[Anonymous No.16651541]

>>16649727
>be me
>reading a thread on the infamous imageboard of 4chan
>get to the end of a wall of green text
>"Ah yes!" I ejaculate. "I have finished this wonderful green tome of text!"
>reading the comments, decide to leave one of my own
Ah yes, OP! It truly was a mighty and adventurous tale you told! A true feat of readership to have finished such a ponderous and weighty post!
>longboard out of my bedroom and into my kitchen for a delectable snack of Hot Pockets and, of course, the manliest of manly drinks, the very brew of the gods: Mountain Dew