/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.16409756]

>first day of philosophy at university
>already outed myself as a pseud
Is this theme present in literature?

[Anonymous No.16409761]

>>16409756
Probably was obvious to begin with

[Anonymous No.16409786]

>>16409756
>already outed myself as a pseud
What happened?

[Anonymous No.16409794]

>>16409756
Tell story OP of how you tried to use 4chan knowledge in real life, and how it backfired massively.

[Anonymous No.16409795]

>>16409756
>anon, it's pronounced "pseud"

[Anonymous No.16409823]

>>16409756
kek well now you got nothing to lose OP
just rant long and hard about your favorite themes and philosophers in every class and ask /lit/ for help with your essays

[Anonymous No.16409832]

>>16409756
please post advice on how to avoid this or any other form of spergdom, thanks.

[Anonymous No.16409860]

>>16409756
what did you do? also, i made similar thread about few minutes ago and it got deleted by jannies, is the literature question just a way to make them fuck off?

[Anonymous No.16410479]

how did it went down?

[Anonymous No.16411793]

>>16409832
Sit quietly in this pose for the entire semester

[Anonymous No.16411842]

>>16411793
Also nake sure to smugly chuckle after someone speaks, guaranteed cool guy status

[Anonymous No.16412332]

>>16411842
Knowingly smirking at the professor every time a student asks for clarification

[Anonymous No.16412343]

>>16412332
And before speaking, come up with a smooth one liner, deliver it ice cold, and sit back smugly

[Anonymous No.16412355]

>>16409756
I did the same thing back when I took my first philosophy class. I remember talking about how I had already read a lot of chinese philosophers like Laozi. I didn't really understand the texts, but I thought I'd look cool if people knew I had read them. Good times

[Anonymous No.16412395]

>>16409795
Yeah, puh-sood. That’s what I said

[Anonymous No.16412453]

>>16412355
During my first philosophy class, the professor asked us for way of naming the individual. Answers were exactly what she expected : the ego, the subject, etc. And when no one could think of anything else I raised my hand slowly. I have a pretty loud and deep voice and I used it in all its majesty to smugly say: "The Unique?". I formulated the question not as someone unsure, but as someone who wanted to test his teacher and to make sure that she too, was a connoisseur of philosophy.
Five years later, I think that poor woman still cringe herself to sleep.

[Anonymous No.16412518]

>>16409832
There's this cursed in between region where you've already read some philosophy but not enough to be an expert.
You cant fully take the philosophy as its being presented at face value and ask genuine questions that spring to mind, but you cant really give complex insightful critiques either.
The one thing you really want to avoid in cases like that is being pretentious. I guess the big trick is do not assume you know better than others about whats being discussed. You dont, thats why youre in college.
If you ask questions try to stick to the matter discussed and dont namedrop random philosophers in an attempt to show off. Think first if you could google the question and find an easy answer or if you need the more nuanced expert opinion from your prof. It doesnt matter if afterwards it turns out to have a very simple answer or its something other people already know, youre there to learn for yourself.

[Anonymous No.16412629]

>>16412343
for inspiration:
but hey, that's just Guenon after all ;)
too bad he ended up a vegetable, NOT an ubramanschj ;)
let's just focus on raising the average IQ shall we? then marxism might dissappear by itself later on ;)
but i mean, it's not like i would have expected anything better - from a kantian ;)

this is how i got laid back in uni.

[Anonymous No.16412635]

>>16409756
This is the problem with this board.
People come here thinking any of the opinions here matter, or are actually respectable to any degree in an actual academic setting. They think the average "argumentation" here would even hold at all in a classroom, much less in a proper discussion with knowledgeable people.
They think the tried and true methods here are a reflection of how literature and philosophy are seen in the real world, while in reality they are just a bunch of pseuds circlejerking each other in an anti-social echo chamber.

OP, I demand to know exactly how you humiliated yourself in detail.

[Anonymous No.16412672]

>>16412635
You literally haven't stepped into a university in your life, the average classroom "discussion" is between the only semi-intelligent student in the class and a semi-educated schizophrenic phil grad boomer, witnessed by the dumb and unthinking eyes of the average university student.

[Anonymous No.16412690]

>>16412635
I've had better discussions here on occasion than with professors.

[Anonymous No.16412734]

>>16412453

A demonologist transcended mongolist professor and Geist activist was teaching a class on Hegel, known necromancer.

"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship the end of history and accept that Absolute Idealism is the most highly-evolved sophism to make us feel good about ourselves the continent has ever known, even greater than self-serving petit-bourgeois protestant theology!"

At this moment an uncaring if he was brave because being judged by illusionary social standards was of no importance to him, egoist, unique girl's school teacher who had smoked more than 15000 cigars in Hippel's winebar and understood the spookiness of all ideology and fully supported whatever he felt like stood up and held up "Der Einzige und sein Eigentum".

"I wrote this, innit?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite synthetically and smugly replied "It's not yours at all, fucking egoist, its the stern, reluctant working of reason towards the full realization of itself in perfect freedom."

"Wrong. It's been a few years or something (time is nothing to me) since I, the Unique One, created it. if it was not mine, and idealism, as you say, is not a spook... then Ghost Busters wouldn't have had a happy ending."

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his balls and copy of Plato's dialogues. He stormed out of the room crying those ironic thesis and antithesis tears, both coming together on his cheeks into synthesis. There is no doubt that at this point our professor, Hegel (who liked to teach about himself), wished he had pulled himself up by his bootstraps and become more than a spook ridden sad cunt interested in arbitrary justifications. He wished so much that he had some kind of Own to hold on to, and he had but just didn't realise it because he was an involuntary egoist.

The students applauded and all started milk shops that day and accepted their Self-Enjoyment as the end of philosophy. An eagle named "Union of Egoists" flew into the room and perched atop the copy of "Stirner's Critics" and shed a beer on the hardcover. "Ich hab' Mein Sach' auf Nichts gestell" was said several times, and Renzo Novatore himself showed up and demonstrated how hand grenades are nothing but a means of killing police officers.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of superstition and his "books" were disregarded for all eternity.

[Anonymous No.16412758]

>>16409756
You outed yourself as a pseud when you declared your philosophy major

[Anonymous No.16412790]

>>16412734
demonically BASED

[Anonymous No.16412796]

>>16409756
That's the first step you had to go through, anon, many here never will

[Anonymous No.16412903]

>>16409786
He namedropped René Guénon to seem intelligent.

[Anonymous No.16414287]

>>16412629
I both visibly and audibly cringed
thanks anon

[Anonymous No.16414299]

>Why yes, I did commit suicide, how can you tell?

[Anonymous No.16414301]

>>16412453
Female professor? Did you ask for a refund?

[Anonymous No.16414868]

>>16411793
people who don't participate in lectures are cowards, it's obvious to us chads who actually speak up.

[Anonymous No.16414886]

>>16414301
Not him, but I go to a supposedly good phil university and exactly half of my professors during my phil major were women. Only one was just barely at the level of men. It’s a joke

[Anonymous No.16414891]

>>16412672
this is pretty true. sometimes there is 2 students though.

[Anonymous No.16415007]

>>16411842
I did this once, completely unconsciously, after a professor, standing at the front of a huge lecture hall, said something I apprently found laughable (can't recall what she said.) She stopped cold and starred me down, fuming, about to unleash. I hadn't been engaged in the class---having been only half-listening in the first place--so I hadn't even put on my glasses. Not being sure she even noticed my laugh of derision, only half-sure myself that I'd done it, I starred intently back trying to make out without the benefit of my glasses whether she was even starring at me. It must've been unnerving to her because she flinched, snapped out of it with a shake of the head and went back to whatever she was saying. Ultimately got a B+, which I consider a spite grade.

Not quite as bad as the time I had my headphones in, waiting for the metro, when a black dude put his hand out asking for change. I thought he was just saying 'what's up' in his black way and lowfived him. He immediately left the platform he was so confused.

[Anonymous No.16415033]

>>16412672
Sums up my uni experience. I might as well have skipped class and stayed in the uni library.

[Anonymous No.16416348]

>>16412672
Kek, this is true and I'm one of the dumb students

[Anonymous No.16416426]

>>16412518
God damn im cringing as this is literally me in an "Ethics and Technology" class, where I try to play the cool guy who already knows about philosophy.
Fuck.

[Anonymous No.16416447]

>ever speaking in class
In my class at least, people who were top5 or top10 in the class almost never said anything during lectures. I was top 2 :^)

[Anonymous No.16416455]

>First day of class
>keep calling Plato play dough
>pronounce neitzche neat zay

[Anonymous No.16416461]

>>16416447
Second place is the first loser anon

[Anonymous No.16416479]

>>16416461
Who cares, academia can suck my dick

[Anonymous No.16416509]

>>16409756

People who talk a lot in big lecture halls are autistic

[Anonymous No.16416568]

>>16416461
>he doesn't elaborately adjust his work in order to be graded the second; his desire for a quiet life more important than an arbitrary competition

[Anonymous No.16416694]

>>16414301
She was unironically good though. She was a crazy feminist in love with modern art but she liked a lot Pascal, Heidegger, Leo Strauss, etc. And talked about them with no prejudice. Very weird and interesting person.

[Anonymous No.16416988]

I'm in my 3rd year of a philosophy major in Australia, and every single class has been full of absolute fucking retards. I'm in disbelief everytime I attend a lecture.
It seems like no one actually understands anything, people put their hands up and ask the most basic shit that they should have understood weeks ago, or automatically. When they try to "contribute" to the "discussion", they say the most obvious, inane shit that could possibly have been said.
I'm doing two degrees, one in arts majoring in philosophy, and one in science majoring in genetics. I would take the science students any day of the fucking week. Besides the autists, the vast majority of them are just normal, above-average-intelligence people. All of the philosophy students are fucking obnoxiously annoying aspies who are fucking morons who have absolutely nothing intelligent to say, and can barely grasp the simplest concepts. Every semester the teacher has to hold back and go really slowly because the fucking retards can't handle going at the pace of someone with a fucking brain.
Fuck you retarded autistic philosophy faggots for ruining every class.

[Anonymous No.16417001]

>>16416988
Consider that the science students only look better by comparison because their material is concrete enough to limit the room for utterly humiliating idiocy.

[Anonymous No.16417011]

>>16417001
Yeah, true. If you put them in the philosophy classes they'd probably be no better.
But just in general, they aren't sniveling faggot pseuds like the philosophy students. Actually, all of the arts students. I've taken classics classes and did a mandatory general "arts" thing in 1st year and they've all been like that.

[Anonymous No.16417046]

>>16417011
Yeah, I honestly don't know what the fuck is wrong with universities. It's probably the commercialisation. The university used to be a place where geniuses go to find more geniuses to study from. Today you have low IQ professors teaching a horde of low IQ, future white collar labourers vapid, inane shit.

[Anonymous No.16417062]

>>16417046
Based, but I will say that the philosophy professors that I've had besides one redditor cunt have been smart as fuck and good guys. I feel sorry for them having to slog through day after day of these dumb faggots

[Anonymous No.16417075]

>>16417062
My experience has been different. Asked a professor who was an "expert on Kant and Hegel" to help me understand dialectics when I was first starting to read about them and he unironically had flatter takes than me. Most professors I've met were huge NPCs with zero understanding of their field of study or general common sense. Their only advantages seemed to be credentials and a wealth of data that they'd memorised but could not understand.

[Anonymous No.16417082]

>>16417046
You can blame the Vietnam War. College students were exempted from the draft, so there was this entire generation of shiftless middle-class kids who ended up pursuing long, meandering, utterly bullshit graduate degrees. This in turn flooded the job market with "educated" applicants, which in turn allowed employers to become choosier, which in turn forced subsequent generations to pursue these bullshit degrees, and so on.

[Anonymous No.16417107]

>>16417075
That sounds like shit. The teachers have been the only saving grace of my entire arts degree

[Anonymous No.16417116]

>>16417046
Correct
Universities and colleges worldwide have been declining in quality for the past two decades.
Mainly due to lowering their standards so they can 'embrace diversity'.
But philosophy is genius-tier compared with 'sociology' or 'gender studies' or 'political science' or 'race studies', or etc

[Anonymous No.16417117]

>>16417082
What a shitshow.
>>16417107
No salvation for me, I'm afraid. Dumb students, dumb teachers and even dumber reading. It's hell.

[Anonymous No.16417118]

>>16417116
>just the past two decades
anon, I...

[Anonymous No.16417140]

>>16417118
Yeah it was starting to get fucky ever for boomers. When I meet a 90 year old man with a college degree, I know I'm talking to somebody who received an actual education.

[Anonymous No.16417146]

>>16417140
You're correct, but even then education just implies a specific skill set for a specific job, rather than education in the original meaning of the word.

[Anonymous No.16417190]

>>16417118
>>16417140
you could be right anons
I was only speaking from my personal experience. Universities in the 1990s were Plato's Academy compared to now.
But I'm prepared to believe that standards were even higher in say the 1950s (Lyceum level maybe?)

[Anonymous No.16417199]

>>16417190
I'm sure the universities were much better in the 90s. The university as an industry is a relatively new phenomenon, but the massification and low quality of education has been a more long-standing issue.

[Anonymous No.16417314]

>tfw born just in time to attend the most prestigious univerisities in the world without even trying cause academia went to shit

[Anonymous No.16417345]

>>16416988
What uni? I'm also a 3rd year philosophy major in Australia. I wonder if we're in the same classes

[Anonymous No.16417377]

>>16417345
UofA

[Anonymous No.16417405]

You guys don't seriously frequent university for philosophy right? Lol.

[Anonymous No.16417495]

>>16417377
I'm at usyd, experience is not quite as bad as yours. Always a few dickheads in class who want to have a dialogue about how much extra reading they did though

[Anonymous No.16417673]

>>16409756
All my professors in college thought I'd end up being a philosopher even the none philosopher professors. Course I was mainly arguing with those Utilitarian bastards and discussing the virtues of Pierce's Blood Purge theory

[Anonymous No.16417791]

>>16417082
You know that the vietnam war only affect CuckSA, right? Same as the 9/11, is just a CuckSA thing, you already knew this, right?

[Anonymous No.16417811]

>>16417791
Yes, I was talking about the USA. Good job noticing that, anon. Here's a cookie, and another observation: social phenomena which originate in one country often spread to other countries by way of cultural diffusion.

[Anonymous No.16417815]

>>16415007
The second story is based, he asked for monetary capital and you gave him confidence, which is much more valuable.

[Anonymous No.16417848]

>>16417811
>social phenomena which originate in one country often spread to other countries by way of cultural diffusion.
Especially when the other countries are culturally colonized by that country

[Anonymous No.16418060]

Hey guys, OP back again. The professor just asked me an ethical question and I had a panic attack. A bunch of retarded nonsense came out my mouth and I'm sure my peers now regard me as either a midwit or a schizo. I was hoping to fix my life this year but it looks like this will be more of the same.

[Anonymous No.16418865]

>tfw kind of interested in pursuing a Philosophy + Art double major
>struggling to get through platos republic
Should I give up?

[Nemo !!GgBWHLRiayD No.16419302]

>first day of sophism at the globarium
>already outed myself as a pseud
There is nothing to be ashamed about.

[Anonymous No.16419381]

>>16412629
kek, based

[Anonymous No.16419421]

>>16418060
you sound like a retard that needs to read Aristotle

[Anonymous No.16419455]

>>16418865
I could impart some of my magic powers upon you, if you'd like.

But I'll say what I told this kid. Look outside the book. Watch videos, try to read articles and essays about the Republic. If you understand the big picture of the entire work (and the philosopher themselves), it becomes easier to put each little piece into a context that makes sense. That's what helped me at least.

[Anonymous No.16419467]

>>16417116
The drive for diversity is a effect of various groups trying to leverage whatever social capital they have in an shrinking, precarious, and ever more credentialed job market.

Standards have lowered so that universities can (1) make more money (2) In America at least, suck up government backed student loan debt, and (3) function as degree mills for the make work office jobs of an 'information/services economy.'

[Anonymous No.16419468]

>>16412635
You’re lucky I don’t break your jaw

[Anonymous No.16419477]

>>16418060
Explain, retard

[Anonymous No.16419568]

>>16409756
No one cares of you don't care. What's weird is walking around for the entire semester feeling ashamed because you said something dumb. You're a student. Your job is to learn and make mistakes. No one expects you to be the smartest guy in the room.

[Anonymous No.16419582]

>>16415007
>I thought he was just saying 'what's up' in his black way and lowfived him.
That's hilarious. Thanks for brightening my day, anon.

[Anonymous No.16419607]

>first day at university studying philosophy
>have only ever talked about philosophy with /lit/
>assume everybody else is like /lit/
>make a joke about guenon
>nobody laughs
>see someone reading hegel
>call him a pseud as a joke
>'huh what's a sood?'
>tell people nietzsche was an incel and that that wittgenstein solved philosophy
>get funny looks
>nobody understands
>this semen slurping major is not for me

[Anonymous No.16419637]

>>16411842
i don't do it on purpose, they say genuinely funny stuff

[Anonymous No.16419775]

>>16419607
You have been in this place too long anon.

[Anonymous No.16419882]

>>16419607
did you use the term "retroactively refuted:" yet?

[Anonymous No.16419911]

>>16419882
my post was a joke but honestly I've actually used that term and it leaves people completely baffled, because they first have to parse what the hell it means to 'retroactively refute' someone, and by the time they realise it's a meaningless phrase, they become too embarrassed to actually make a point in fear that they seem slow

it's the perfect argument. try it. just say, 'uuuh were you not aware that habermas retroactively refuted what you're saying?'

[Anonymous No.16419938]

>>16419911
I always thought it meant that the argument you've been made has already been addressed and refuted by someone else in the past

[Anonymous No.16419944]

>>16419938
if you really think about it, all refutations are retroactive...

[Anonymous No.16419995]

Everybody is a pseud when they enter into college. Really, what the fuck do you know when you’re 18?

[Anonymous No.16420251]

>>16419995
I'm a first year and I'm 25

[Anonymous No.16420561]

>>16412672
for me it was
>prof: does anybody know this?
>me: Knows it, doesn't bother to speak
>nobody else answers
>prof: wow I can't believe nobody knows this

[Anonymous No.16420567]

>>16420561
Maybe half the time I understood a little of it, but panic disorder is some crazy shit.

[Anonymous No.16420613]

>>16417011
It's a myth, at least at my uni, that the students taking a BA are pretentious art fags. By and large those taking first year courses or philosophy degrees are just getting degrees to work in an office, doing requisite humanities courses for other degrees like business or CS, or planning to go to law school.

[Anonymous No.16420692]

>>16412332
>Anon, you seem like you have something to say. Would you care to comment?

[Anonymous No.16420749]

>>16420692
*pushes up glasses*

heh, nothing of consequence.

[Anonymous No.16421846]

>>16419995
where in the OP did I say I was 18?

[Anonymous No.16423152]

>>16420251
Maybe a good decision.

[Anonymous No.16423261]

>>16419455
>don't actually read the text moron
this is the absolute state of a pseud

[Anonymous No.16423268]

>>16419607
I fucking once told my whole literary theory class that ethics and morality are a colonizer narrative how cringe am I?

[Anonymous No.16423629]

>>16411793
this

[Anonymous No.16423637]

>>16420561
i've had this

[Anonymous No.16424030]

>>16420561
Talking is for pseuds

[Anonymous No.16424071]

>>16418060
this isnt high school, saying i cant think of a good answer is acceptable

[Anonymous No.16424238]

>>16418060
go into more detail and at least it will be funny

[Anonymous No.16424462]

>>16415007
Kek based. You're gonna be alright anon

[Anonymous No.16424468]

>>16420561
Better off than answering, potentially getting it wrong, then getting insulted or humiliating yourself

[Anonymous No.16424490]

>>16419455
wait what is so hard to understand in the first 10 pages of the Gorgias? The first 5 or so aren't even about philosophy and the other 5 Socrates just fucks around telling the Sophist bros that if being a baker is about baking and painters are painting then what the fuck does a Rhetorician do?

[Anonymous No.16424497]

>>16419607
based

[Anonymous No.16424547]

>>16409756
Everyone taking philosophy, teaching philosophy, with a passing interest in philosophy, who has a friend who is into philosophy, who has considered reading any philosophy, is a pseud.

Fuck you.

[Anonymous No.16425028]

>>16424071
i didn't want him to think i was a brainless midwit

[Anonymous No.16425188]

>>16425028
So you instead made him think you're just a brainlet? Good job lmao