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/lit/ - Literature

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1635043 No.1635043 [Reply] [Original]

I have a question of sexual semantics for you

I am British and when it comes to sex I have an issue when referring to the woman's primary sexual organ. To say 'pussy' is to me American, out-of-place and a little crass; but to say 'vagina' is a little cold and does not seem sexual to me. What other words could I use?

>> No.1635050

cunt, beaver - Bret Easton Ellis

>> No.1635053
File: 39 KB, 239x360, Brandon-Flowers-brandon-flowers-9946104-333-500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635053

>>1635050

beaver is really American so wouldn't work and cunt is such a hateful word. I know women who slap men over saying it; there is no worse profanity in English (beyond racial slurs possibly)

>> No.1635057

>>1635053

hahahahahahaa you FAG ahahhahahaha

>> No.1635058

By scientific. Say vagina.

There is no classy way to refer to genitalia outside of the scientific way.

>> No.1635061

>>1635043
love canal

>> No.1635062

>>1635053
>brandon flowers
please, delete this thread and JUST LEAVE.

>> No.1635063

>'vagina' is a little cold

maybe the ones you've encountered >:)

>> No.1635064

tuppence

>> No.1635065

I thought you brits called it a minge.

>> No.1635066

>>1635063
delete every post before this and archive

>> No.1635067

box

>> No.1635068

vagingo
vajayjay

>> No.1635070

hole
twat
front bottom

>> No.1635071

>>1635070
>front bottom
good choice

>> No.1635072

if chaucer can use the word cunt then it's good enough for you

>> No.1635073

Call it The Pleasure Dome.

It's a literary reference, so you'll seem smart.

>> No.1635075

the tulips on the mound

>> No.1635080

biological pleasure sock

>> No.1635085

Being British, I have a similar problem, so I've taken to calling my girlfriend's vagina "The Kraken".

So, when I want sex, I just have to shout "Release the Kraken!"

Yeah, I don't get sex as much as I'd like.

>> No.1635086
File: 7 KB, 251x168, 1286207972565s.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635086

pudenda or front butt

pic related : twat, box, or hairpie

>> No.1635089
File: 69 KB, 800x600, blonde chick with nice pussy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635089

>>1635043
overcome your issues,
pussy is good

>> No.1635097

>/adv/ plz help i'm a lil prude catholic boy

Reported - Saged - Told - F***'in told

>> No.1635099

Curiously pleasuresome tunnel of love and passion.

>> No.1635104

the japanese simply refer to it as "there" so maybe you could go with that

>> No.1635124

slime glove.

pink taco

poonanny

cunt

twiddledeedeedoowopshabam

ima bump this wonderfilled thread.

>> No.1635128

Flower.

>> No.1635141
File: 185 KB, 473x350, sinatra group.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635141

"Sammy with the eye out"

Frank Sinatra is alleged to have made this comparison. Good enough for me.

>> No.1635145

well, the classiest euphemism you could use would be "bearded clam."

>> No.1635162

I have a question of sexual semantics for you

I am British and when it comes to sex I have an issue when referring to the woman's milk-producing organs. To say 'tits' is to me American, out-of-place and a little crass; but to say 'breasts' is a little cold and does not seem sexual to me. What other words could I use?

Some have suggested "badonkadonks", but that's also a bit too American...

>> No.1635176

Joseph Heller in 'Catch 22' referred to it as a "divine fulcrum".
'round here it's called a fanny which is why we all laugh at the fat american tourists and their 'fanny packs'.
Question /lit/ why do fat tourists wear sports clothing and training shoes; they clearly never use them for running.

>> No.1635188

>>1635162
breasts =baps
bread products as metaphors are always appropriate.

French Stick
Bagel
jam filled doughnut

>> No.1635194

cunt. don't emphasise the 't' otherwise its a swear word

>> No.1635198
File: 60 KB, 550x400, xxxilove4chan.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635198

Mother and I always called them "meat curtains."

>> No.1635226
File: 92 KB, 590x468, cunt.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635226

>>1635053
You are no Englishman.

>> No.1635256

Axe wound is the best. You know it to be true.

>> No.1635268

say Nooky! it sounds kind of english

>> No.1635275

Why do you need to refer to it with words?

Grab her by her cunt/vagina/pussy/beaver/axe wound/clam/tunnel or whatever you want to call it and force your way in.

>"hey, is it ok if I put my penor in your vajayjay?"

that's not how sex works faggot

>> No.1635278

snatch, twat, box, cunt, vag,

>> No.1635280

>>1635275

I'm with this guy.

>> No.1635281

>no 'slit'

got to be kidding me

>> No.1635282
File: 194 KB, 471x480, brandon5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635282

I have come to the conclusion that there is no real word that sounds good. Vagina is the best option and fanny is good in casual conversation.

>> No.1635285

>>1635282
The word is tuppence you idiot

>> No.1635289

Just call it a sheath.
Box works too.

>> No.1635296

bird

>> No.1635298

'poon' enjoyed a brief spell of popularity here in the UK last year

>> No.1635299

gesture with your eyebrows

>> No.1635301

pudenda is latin. it kind of flows.
puuuudenDa

captcha: kriply microflora

>> No.1635303

Gash is a pretty disgusting one

>> No.1635305

downstairs mixup

>> No.1635315

Don't you brits say "twat" at least once every thirty seconds?

>> No.1635316

>ctrl+f
>muffin
>not found

>> No.1635325

>>1635305
Mighty Boosh reference - nice

>> No.1635327

Go medieval and use scabbard

>> No.1635328

PUNANI MOTHERFUCKER, PUNANI

>> No.1635330

>>1635305

Maybe I'll deal with it like I dealt with Curly Jefferson!

>> No.1635336
File: 338 KB, 600x1000, 1270587767886.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635336

I give you the lyrics to Bloodhound Gang's "Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo":

Vulcanize the whoopee stick
In the ham wallet

Cattle prod the oyster ditch
With the lap rocket

Batter dip the cranny ax
In the gut locker

Retrofit the pudding hatch
Ooh la la
With the boink swatter

If i get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then
In lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though
I brazillian wax poetic so hypothetically
I don't wanna beat around the bush

Foxtrot Unifrom Charlie Kilo
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

Marinate the nether rod
In the squish mitten

Power drill the yippee bog
With the dude piston

Pressure wash the quiver bone
In the bitch wrinkle

Cannonball the fiddle cove
Ooh la la
With the pork steeple

If i get you in the loop when I make a point to be straight with you then
In lieu of the innuendo in the end know my intent though
I brazillian wax poetic so hypothetically
I don't wanna beat around the bush

Foxtrot Unifrom Charlie Kilo
Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where
Put the you know what in the you know where pronto

>> No.1635340

Embrace awkwardness and always use over the top analogies, pick a theme and improvise.

>young squaw, I will erect my feathered totem in your warm and dark tipi

>> No.1635383

you guys vagina only refers to the inside passage though right? the lips and clit etc outside are not the vagina, so saying 'I wanna eat your vagina' doesn't really make sense there.

And yeah, I find it is a slightly difficult issue.
I guess i use pussy, or 'parts'.

>> No.1635656

>>1635383
then use vulva you faggot

>> No.1635672

>>1635053
Explain to the women who slap you that you are merely trying to reclaim the word so that they may never again feel ashamed of such a beautiful thing.

>> No.1635675

Have you tried slot or gash?

>> No.1635684

The Gates of Ishtar

>> No.1635690

Cunt and tits or you're just being goofy.

If you're going to dirtytalk someone, it might as well be, well, dirty.

>> No.1635722

Hoo-hilly
Hairy Mary
Part
Minge
Ladycave
Slough

>> No.1635731

>>1635128
Not this, too feeble and feminine. Manliness must be conserved or you won't get any action at all.

>> No.1635737

EXCELSIOR

>> No.1635773

Cooter.

>> No.1635776

Ladygarden
'may i plough a straight furrow in your Ladygarden with my tool'

There, I fixed it.

>> No.1635779

vaj

not too dirty but it still keeps part of the actual word intact!!

>> No.1635781

Bottleopener

>> No.1635822

>>1635731
there is nothign manly about a vagina, wtf

>> No.1635826

>>1635773
*slaps forehead* It was so obvious!

>> No.1635832

I have always called it the hoohaw.

>> No.1635857

>>1635822
There is a masculine approach to a vagina and there is a feminine one.

Calling it a fucking flower makes you sound like a pussy.

By your logic any phrase mentioning the female genitalia makes you sound feminine. How silly.

>> No.1635862

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLCpS3_X08c

>> No.1635866

the saxons of olden times called the vagina the woman's "Butt beard" which makes sense in an era almost no razors

>> No.1635867

ITT: virgins

>> No.1635874
File: 60 KB, 640x480, gareth_stare_640.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635874

>>1635867

>> No.1635881

D.H. Lawrence has called it a tail before, although depending on the phrasing that might be too confusing considering tail means ass today, I think.

Still sounds nice though.

>> No.1635883

I think slit sounds good coming from a British accent. It is dirty but I don't think it is as offensive as cunt.

>> No.1635891

>>1635867
No way, we never fornicate because we still know how to love. Nothing beats a night out with your lady and little tome of Rumi on the beach.

>> No.1635892

>>1635315

Twat does mean pussy but I'd only ever use it as an insult. To describe a woman's pussy as a twat would sound pretty ridiculous, although if I were meaning to be insulting then that might be appropriate.

Pussy or cunt ftw

>> No.1635895

Gash

I think that's worse than anything else. Conjures up the image of fucking an open wound.

>> No.1635902
File: 42 KB, 448x599, 448px-george_bernard_shaw_1934-12-06.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635902

I only spent four months in Britain and even I know that the equivalent of "pussy" is "fanny."

This has been a report from a wise American tourist.

>> No.1635914
File: 33 KB, 510x383, Jay.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635914

'Clunge'. Its kind of disgusting but i like it.

'Flaps' works too
>>1635162
Baps or Jubblies.

>> No.1635931

The rocket pocket.

>> No.1635940

Flange

>> No.1635966
File: 47 KB, 225x300, rosshappy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1635966

>>1635299

This.

>> No.1636006

>>1635336
>bitch wrinkle

I think we have winrar.

Also, I worked briefly with a salesman who explained that the key to sales is to tell the value of your product to "every split-tail and swinging-dick you can find." That job sucked, but that phrase is the fucking best.

>> No.1636598

>>1635058

"Vagina" is inaccurate, unless you mean specifically the internal passage leading to the womb. The clinical term for the whole female genitalia would be "vulva". You could always go Latinate and say "cunnus".

>>1635301

"pudenda" = "things to be ashamed of". Might want to avoid, depending on context.

>> No.1636599

cunt

>> No.1636606

There's a scene in the first or last episode of one of the series of The L Word in which the principal characters sit around and mention words for female genitalia.

>> No.1636614

Dive into her moist folds

>> No.1636626

well, I think you should get over yourself and use "pussy"
if you do it with confidence and naturally, girls will be comfortable with it
otherwise, the easiest way is just say "inside you" if you're talking to a girl -- pretty nice dirty talk during sex ("oh, god it feels so good inside you" etc), "inside her" works for pretty much any sexual reference with her pussy, people will know what you're talking about

>> No.1636633

muff, as in muffin

common use: muff diving

>> No.1636659 [DELETED] 

British slang (not very offensive, except to prudes): fanny (this causes Americans endles problems in the UK, Australia, and South Africa), chuff.

>> No.1636661

>>1636659
fanny actually means "rear-end" in US

>> No.1636664

British slang (not very offensive, except to prudes): fanny (this causes Americans endless problems in the UK, Australia, and South Africa), chuff.

>> No.1636666

>>1635881
It was tail for hundreds of years before that, at least since Shakespeare.

>> No.1636667

>>1636661

I know that: that's why I said that "fanny ... causes Americans endless problems in the UK, Australia, and South Africa" - Americans will use "fanny" in their familiar sense (backside, buttocks), not realizing that it means the vulva in most other major forms of modern English. This causes misunderstandings and embarrassments all round.

>> No.1636668

Just call it a vag

>> No.1636674

I like pistil. Botany term for flower vag. Sounds hot.

>> No.1636677

>>1635226
Why isn't he moving his lips?

>> No.1636679

Ello, Guvnah! What yeon about, then?

Da missus likes it when I call it my "cookie"

>> No.1636682

In a intimate setting I generally use the word nethers.

Might get akward if I ever date a dutch person.

>> No.1636690

orifice

>> No.1636704

The granny flat.

blow hole

socket

space port

the narrow path

>> No.1636788
File: 73 KB, 339x409, Pigdis.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1636788

Let's inject (nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more) a little erudition: in ancient Greek, especially Aristophanes, a young and / or hairless vulva was a "piglet" (khoiros, delphakion), any could be a "pig" (delphax); and in Latin pig ("porcus") was apparently that of a young girl especially ripe for marriage.

>> No.1636808

Sex.

>> No.1636816
File: 138 KB, 355x500, chubby_bro.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1636816

I was about to know that feel bro, but then I realised you were a gigantic faggot.

Don't refer to it directly, just say 'you'.

>> No.1636831

In and around that area:

Beef curtains
Baff
Biffy
Badger
Cooch
Crooky
Conch (primary metaphor in William Golding's "The Lord of the Flies")
Duck
Growler
Huffer
Jar
Jeremy Hunt
Lesley
Paddy
Rodney
Ruff
Tickle
Zip

>> No.1636850

IN my experience sluts don't like it if you call it a "minge". Or when you call them sluts.

Just a hint.