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/lit/ - Literature

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1630149 No.1630149 [Reply] [Original]

Since /lit/ has descended into stupid trolling, I thought I'd post my new story, and repost some of my old ones. For those of you annoyed by tripfags, I'm only going to use it when I'm posting stories, which I will do on a regular basis.

I can't seem to use pastebin on the first post, so I shall try in the first response.

>> No.1630154
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1630154

get on with it

>> No.1630161

Alright, so it seems that 4chan just doesn't like pastebin.

http:// |||||tinyurl(DOT)com/||||||4juctlp

This links to a pastebin with pastebin links to the stories.

It's a pretty broad selection, from dark reality to madcap fantasy. Each one's like four or five pages. I hope you enjoy.

I'd love to hear some feedback on these stories as well. Hopefully this will go a ways for making a new /lit/.

>> No.1630168

>Everyone in her village liked her, no mean feat in a town so small; but the person who liked her best of all was her grandmother.

Everyone in her village liked her - no mean feat in a town so small - but the person who liked her best of all was her grandmother.

>> No.1630173

>Even when I was young, I was distressed by the state of the environment. I would stay up late worrying about the rainforest.

stopped reading there

>> No.1630176

>>1630173
That's true, it is a lie. I would have screaming fits about the greenhouse gasses, lie down on the ground and refuse to get into the car. But that's even less believable.

>> No.1630186
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1630186

>>1630176

Fiction is presupposed to be a "lie", so that distinction you make is useless, and lets me know things about you that i'm not interested in knowing.

Your writing is mediocre, the topic is uninteresting, and your character, off-putting.

>> No.1630190

>>1630186
That one's a nonfiction piece, but thank you for your input. I hope to see some of your writing soon!

>> No.1630196

>>1630161
I remember reading henraising a while back, and I thought it was great. Have you ever heard of the drabblecast? seems like something they'd love over there.

>> No.1630208
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1630208

>>1630186
While I'll agree that "waste" was a bit dull with a severe tonal shift about halfway through, it seems like with some work on the phrasing and tonality it could be much better.

For example, talk about the other reasons that you enjoyed your childhood. The stories following the rivers seem much more interesting than the dishpit, although that could be a story in itself if done well.

I liked the Wolf, it took some unexpected turns. I might read it over again and get some specific criticisms.

>> No.1630235

Alright, I was thinking of submitting "the Wolf" to a story competition. Is it good enough?

>> No.1630236

>>1630208
Taken under advisement. I was actually retooling "waste" right now, since the story I'm trying to tell can be written with rivers alone.

>> No.1630241

>>1630235
^Fix the various punctuation issues so I can read it without stressing?

>> No.1630245

OP my advice is spend some time with grammar. Read Eat, Shoots, and Leaves, watch Grammar Rock through, pick up E.B White's Elements of Style and the TTS course on building great sentences.

>> No.1630246

>>1630241
seems reasonable. I know I always get "it's" wrong, but what else is there?

I'm mostly worried that people will become offended.