Write what's on your mind

[Anonymous No.15775908]

[Anonymous No.15775918]

Not much desu

[Anonymous No.15775928]

>>15775908
This scene reminds me of Don Juan on the devil's eye. What movie is it?

[Anonymous No.15776019]

I wonder how many /pol/yps actually bother to read through Decline of the West. It's like every fucking day we have those threads and Evola threads, but rarely is there any deeper discussion. They feel alienated and think oh this intellectual wrote a big book explaining why we're in decline but shit, this will give me the confirmation I seek. Then you push them on it, try to unravel what their ''traditionalism'' actually consists of, and it's always, without fail, about wanting to go back to the security and sense of community they imagined they'd have in the 50s or so. Muh modernity is windowdressing insofar as it's larping about how the french revolution was a disaster, or the enlightenment a mistake. I'm not a leftie but I understand why you'd think people on the right tend more towards anti-intellectualism.
>>15775928
Manhattan Melodrama (1934), and pic related is Possessed (1931). I find these pics very soothing.

[Anonymous No.15776054]

>>15775908
Do "normal" people enjoy/not mind sex scenes in movies? I'm asexual (inb4 "incel") and I've always failed to understand or appreciate sex scenes in movies, and around 80% of movies have sexual content in some way apparently. Nowadays if there's so much as a budding romantic relationship in a movie I turn it off. Surely even the sex-havers of society find sex-scenes to be gratuitous and a false portrayal of life, given that going to the toilet is not something regularly filmed. Probably a question better suited for /tv/ but they're pedos.

[Anonymous No.15776064]

>>15776019
pseud post

[Anonymous No.15776080]

>>15776054
Most people watch anything that uses edginess of any kind as a device, and are 100% convinced that they have viewed content.

[Anonymous No.15776083]

>>15776064
Prove me wrong. You're all retards.

[Anonymous No.15776090]

HBO MAX has all the Harry Potter movies on right now, plus old gems like the seventh seal and the Maltese falcon and battleship Potemkin, plus the lord of the rings, AND the original scooby doo series. I’m pumped.

[Anonymous No.15776093]

>>15776019
Women used to look so bored back in the day. I prefer the semen demon archetype.

[Anonymous No.15776107]

>>15775908
>Even if we all agreed with all the saints and prophets, all would not be fine. For we would still be mortal, partial, suffering poor creatures, not very intelligent and never the authors of our best hope.

The last author I have read who would at least cheer me up a little is E.B. White, the rest have been all doomers.

[Anonymous No.15776121]

>>15776083
>You're all retards.
He's got a point.

[Anonymous No.15776130]

cmere

[Anonymous No.15776144]

which board do you think is more coom. lit or fit?
im thinking fit. i only get these asinine coomer ads on fit. but i get none on lit.
surely the CTR is higher on fit, thus warranting the ads.
or lit is full of poor NEETs while you have to have some money on fit (gym membership).

[Anonymous No.15776151]

This fog won't leave me. I haven't been able to think clearly for weeks and I'm worried that I'll be stuck like this forever. I feel so weak.

[Anonymous No.15776154]

>>15776144
Dunno, anon. People on /fit/ use those hormones and shit like that, don't they? I never really bothered checking it out properly.

[Anonymous No.15776165]

>>15776154
i reckon with near certainty that most people on fit arent /fraud/ users.

[Anonymous No.15776205]

>>15776144
/fit/ definitely. There are constantly coomposters on /fit/ not that they are rare on /lit/. It got to the point where I had to stop using it because I'm trying to go NoPorn rn and it doesn't help when they post images of attractive young women. At least most of the coomposting here is that young cute female booktubers with their clothes on and blogs, which at least triggers the less animalistic side of my brain and makes me just wish for a trad Catholic philosophy gf rather than a cumdump, which is really what I want from a woman tbqh.

[Anonymous No.15776224]

>>15776205
>trad Catholic philosophy gf
You're a LARPer for not seeing the discrepancy here.

[Anonymous No.15776245]

>>15776224
Not him but you can want an educated wife who still takes care of your home/children.

[Anonymous No.15776246]

>>15776144
everyone who started lifting did it to attract more girls, later the reason ends up being a combination of self-help guru bullshit (because it didn't work like they thought it would) or they simply don't want to admit it

if I'm wrong, then I have no idea how the mind of a teen looks like,

[Anonymous No.15776264]

>>15776246
this is 100% correct. most people, myself included, started lifting for girls. anyone who tells you otherwise is either LARPing or the genuine rare outlier.

[Anonymous No.15776270]

Had a dream that I got nuked. It’s a fairly bad situation, once I saw the explosion I knew what it was immediately but I dived for cover and held my breath anyway, just waiting for the shockwave. It didn’t help and all my organs were cooked. It was like something out of Clark Ashton Smith, a portal to the fire hell is suddenly opened and it blasts the life out of everything. Is it possible to survive a nuclear explosion?

[Anonymous No.15776291]

>>15776246
>>15776264
It helps on other aspects of living, anons.

"mens sana in corpore sano", probably some Greek said some bs like that too.

[Anonymous No.15776301]

>>15776224
I know a Catholic philosophy professor and his wife (both of whom went to CUA for philosophy) in my school has like 8 kids and they are pretty orthodox. Being educated in your faith and philosophy, being pious and having a lot of kids aren't mutually exclusive. In fact, Musonius Rufus said that that was the ideal state of marriage.

I honestly would just like her to be interested in philosophy (mainly Classical philosophy) because I believe you should raise your kids to have virtue as soon as they are able to understand basic ethics and a lot of parents kind of coddle their kids too long and don't teach them enough about ethics, even if they do give them good catechesis in matters of faith. I don't think it makes them bad people or anything, I just think it's the root of a lot of societies' problems and while I can't fix it overnight, it's a good idea to raise a family right in order to possibly change the world in the future or at least make sure they can raise their families correctly.

[Anonymous No.15776303]

Being stuck at home with my family for the past months has made me realize how completely alone I’d be without them. I really need to get some closer friends, and preferably a wife / long-term partner

[Anonymous No.15776318]

>>15776291
it does. the benefits of lifting weights extends beyond the aesthetics, although looking like a sick cunt is a pretty legit reason in of itself.
but like the other anon said, its still true that most people started lifting because of girls.

[Anonymous No.15776352]

>>15776318
The regular anon? Probably KEK saw some Zyzz fanfic or some bs like that and got meme'd into it. I remember a friend being a huge fan of him.

>>15776301
This is something that I was honestly thinking about. We don't teach children how to be parents. It all goes into child's play and when they grow up and start working and having children themselves. They don't even know some psychology basics.

[Anonymous No.15776373]

They hate me because I'm a straight white male. It gets tiresome after a while.

[Anonymous No.15776398]

I wish I was a heavy metal star, it looks like it's fun.

[Anonymous No.15776412]

>>15776352
should i have referred to Mishima? or the cultural legacy of Greek statues? it all boils down to the same essential core: all things being equal, beautiful > ugly
zyzz was a dumbass. no doubt about that. but he holds a special place in the annals of 4channel. and godamnit, i will make references to him.

[Anonymous No.15776444]

>>15776352
I think it has to do with the leisure modern life affords us. 14 year olds in ancient and some modern agrarian (or generally farming/fishing) societies are perfectly capable of doing the work an adult does. Meanwhile, a 14 year old in Europe or the US only has to worry about going to school and getting good grades, which is not as immediately stressful as gathering the food you need to survive and making sure you also have some left over to make some money to feed your family. I'm not gonna say that we aren't blessed in that sense, but I think we forget how blessed we are and take advantage of it and tend not to do a whole lot with it in general, which is why it seems that people don't really mentally age until their early to mid 20's into adults, when they are forced to find a career and do things that will provide for them in the future.

[Anonymous No.15776461]

>>15776412
But they weren't about girls though. And they didn't showed their progress. Mishima has it only on books. Zyzz showed himself on 4chan and made to whatever he thought he wanted at the time. As in you see how he started and where he got.

[Anonymous No.15776501]

>>15776444
I don't know, anon. I think our father's would probably messed up in a similar fashion. But when I see what they did and take into account the fact that they read a lot and knew what they were doing in some sense. I sometimes wonder how other people like me who grew up with parents who were completely clueless are doing now.

[Anonymous No.15776514]

My wife admitted she doesn’t love me, but that I was “good enough” and she needed someone to settle down with. She said I’m the bronze medal but she still appreciates what I do for her & our kids even if there’s zero romantic feelings.

I don’t really know how to feel. She wasn’t rude or angry or anything. But she said she’s basically with me because her parents like me and I’m financially stable. Should I suck it up and pretend this never happened? Just why

[Anonymous No.15776521]

>>15776461
perhaps i should have clarified my original post. i honestly think we're in 99% agreement but there is just a miscommunication issue.
most people started lifting for girls. Mishima wasnt most people though, i will give you that. but then, he was a gay manlet that committed sepuku; he very obviously is an outlier.
but a lot of people end up continuing their weight lifting journey for other reasons/benefits as well. this may include discarding "lifting for girls" entirely as a reason, and it may include a whole host of reasons which still include "glutes for the sloots." looking like a sick cunt isnt only tethered to "curls for the girls" although it often is. looking like a sick cunt is a benefit in of itself, girls or not.

[Anonymous No.15776550]

>>15776514
women are hypergamous. thats just the truth. it is their biological imperative to always seek more and better. couple that with third wave feminism and you get this highly capitalistic-esque slogan
>never settle for less
nature can be a beautiful rainbow and a hellish plague-ridden jungle. it is what it is. such is life.
you got two choices. improve yourself to the point where she no longer thinks youre a bronze medal. or accept it and move on.
what are your goals? if child rearing is of the utmost importance, it is critical to keep in mind the various negatives that are correlated with growing up in a single-parent household.
it is your life. you must do what you want to do.
>a man can do what he wills. he cannot will what he wills.

[Anonymous No.15776554]

>>15776514
How did this come up?

[Anonymous No.15776623]

read norwegian wood yesterday, texting a girl with enormous titties today. thinking about how i really want to go live in the woods. went hiking a week ago and i forgot how much i love nature. what fucking good did convenience do anyone. i want to be a bear not a human breathing in 3 million peoples farts and exhaust fumes

[Anonymous No.15776633]

>>15776550
men cheat more than women. people are hypergamous, you think chad is committed to one woman? don't be deliberately obtuse

[Anonymous No.15776697]

>>15776514
She seems fucked, perhaps you should leave her. Idk what the divorce laws look like where you are, but I can't see myself marrying someone who doesn't love me. Did you ask if she ever loved you at one point or another?

[Anonymous No.15776698]

>>15776633
Chad isnt hypergamous, although Chad is willing to spread his seed far and wide. you clearly do not have the necessary contextual understanding to carry on this conversation if youre misdefining hypergamy.
hypergamy isnt the same as non-monogamous relationships. Chad is willing to sleep with almost anyone. women, on the other hand, arent leaving men for other men of lesser socio-economic status.
furthermore, Chads, by their very definition, occupy top rung of the ladder. they are, at best, 20% of the male population.
this isnt to say that only Chads are willing to sleep around. all men are willing to sleep around. but only Chads are capable of sleeping around.
all women are hypergamous, and all women are capable of engaging in hypergamy, because Chad is willing to sleep with almost anyone, and because some women are willing to share Chad than have a one-on-one relationship with a non-Chad. and even if it isnt Chad, it just has to be "someone who is better than my current mate." is it any wonder that women initiate 75% of all divorces?
also women and men cheat at fairly the same rate.

[Anonymous No.15776709]

>>15776633
I think it's about the same. Seen surveys that claim both with very slim margins. Seems worse when women do it though, since men are more focused on just the physical act of sex cumming into another woman carries less weight with it than the opposite.

[Anonymous No.15776727]

I've unironically started fapping to loli. These are the dangers of being a coomer.

[Anonymous No.15776728]

>>15776698
>" is it any wonder that women initiate 75% of all divorces?
It used to be mostly men who initiated divorce, until they loosened the laws. When you had to show one party was at fault for breaking the marriage contract, it was men who left women. Nowadays when you don't need a reason it's women who leave men.

[Anonymous No.15776738]

>>15776698
men cheat more than women though.
>women arent leaving men for others of lower socioeconomic status
this is idiotic and blatantly wrong. it's pretty funny to see men bitch about the very shit they do to women. if you were a woman with the same mindset that you have right now you would conclude men are garbage.
>>15776709
women cheat because they're focused on the act of fucking a man who can actually make them cum

[Anonymous No.15776781]

>>15776738
none of us is going to be arsed to dig up the data. im sure you can find some cherry picked data that shows men cheat more than women. and im sure i can find some cherry picked data that shows women and men cheat at fairly the same rate.
the difference is that a cheating man isnt as looked down upon as a cheating woman. and thus there is less incentive for a man to lie about it on a survey. if anything, the numbers reported by women are lower than the reality.
it takes immense skill for a man to be capable of cheating. what exactly that "skill" is is another topic for another day. but no man ever got laid by taking off his pants. a woman can easily get laid just by removing her garments. and that is why men cheating isnt as frowned upon as women cheating. as immoral as it is, like the dude running some elaborate scheme, it took some skill to do it. it takes no skill to take off your panties.
the same applies to hypergamy. women, by and large, marry across and up. men, by and large, marry across and down. you will see male doctors with female waitresses. you will rarely see female CEOs with male bus drivers.

[Anonymous No.15776782]

>>15776514
that's the norm anon...

[Anonymous No.15776810]

>>15776781
>men are such cumbrains that they marry down for the pussy
>men are so hypergamous they run elaborate schemes to get pussy
smdh

[Anonymous No.15776835]

>>15776810
You really need to at least understand the necessary terminology before you continue on a conversation. Its like what Wittgenstein said. If lions could speak English, we still wouldn't be able to communicate with them.
The whole point of my referencing the ponzi scheme is that as despicable as the act is, you have to admit it takes skills to run a successful ponzi scheme. There's a reason we both celebrate and loathe people like Jordan Belfort, aka wolf of wall street.

[Anonymous No.15776880]

>>15776835
>we celebrate and loathe
>we
speak for yourself. you think a man conning a woman into sex is admirable and skillful, but a woman marrying into money and power isn't skillful? men rape and kill more than women, is that admirable? cheating is just degenerate anon, and men cheat more than women.

>Trend data going back to the 1990s suggests that men have always been more likely than women to cheat. Even so, older men were no more likely to cheat than their younger peers in the past. In the 1990s, the infidelity rate peaked among men ages 50 to 59 (31%) and women ages 40 to 49 (18%). It was lower for both men and women at the older end of the age spectrum. Between 2000 and 2009, the highest rate of infidelity shifted to men ages 60 to 69 (29%) and women ages 50 to 59 (17%). Meanwhile, the gender gap at ages 80+ increased from 5% to 12% in two decades

[Anonymous No.15776912]

>>15776880
I never said cheating is admirable. In fact I explicitly used the words immoral, despicable, and loathe to characterize such acts.
If you're going to hold a disingenuous conversation with me, at least try to make it humorous. It would much more enjoyable that way.

[Anonymous No.15776948]

>>15776912
>celebrate and loathe
don't be obtuse.

people are hypergamous, women have the opportunity more.
people are shit. men cheat more, women marry up. blaming third wave feminism and women as the bogeyman reeks of teenager/mid 20's man that spends most of their time absorbing youtube and pol propaganda vomit instead of living.

[Anonymous No.15776954]

I don't know bros, cheating on my girl and fathering a child that I don't have to raise is kinda hot...

[Anonymous No.15776960]

I feel like nothing happens in my life and that I have no will. When I was still in therapy I'd struggle to come up with things to talk about after I had exhausted all of the details of family history. Just nothing happens in my life. Any friends I used to have in school have fallen away. Everyone I interact with now is from work. But I never see them socially and they are only friendly to me because I am their boss. There are no women in my life and never have been.

[Anonymous No.15776967]

>>15776948
You keep projecting, son.

[Anonymous No.15776979]

>>15776019
Trad posters are fucking idiots who have no grasp of history

[Anonymous No.15776985]

There are amateur fireworks being lit as I lean back in my chair and let my thoughts mellow out. It hasn’t been a great day but I won’t go into why, although earlier I thought to myself that I’d like to get into making ambient music. I’ve been liking the genre a lot lately, especially the thinner sounding synths that remind me of snow or grass. I am debating whether to make another tuna melt or not for dinner, I could easily just read myself to sleep but I might benefit from another meal. I want to write another story soon, or at least come up with an idea for one so I can work on it casually. I wonder what sorts of writers are in this thread.

[Anonymous No.15776989]

>>15776054
Have you had sex? If not you probably should
Unironically

[Anonymous No.15776999]

I want to create something but I have no ideas. Making a movie would be fun but I have no strength to do it, I am overwhelmed by the difficulty. In life I have learned that anything that's difficult is not worth the effort: everything that is good comes naturally. When I make an effort I usually end up being punished for it.

[Anonymous No.15777006]

>>15776967
texting a 5'11 girl with enormous titties rn, going to go ride my motorcycle and skate later tonight. after that i'm going to finish reading They Will Inherit The Earth. i'd call that living.

[Anonymous No.15777017]

>>15776019

Eh, I live in a traditional patriarchy culture so when I say I want traditional, all I’m saying is I support my current culture.

[Anonymous No.15777032]

Most don't realise how difficult it is to interact with the world when you're a below average man. People take no interest in you, they will answer you in polite but curt sentences, trying to engage a stranger in conversation is like talking to a stone wall. No wonder ugly men become introverts with social phobia: interactions become hell because you can literally FEEL that most people don't want anything to do with you.

A handful of times I've interacted with women who genuinly seemed to enjoy my company: on each seperate occasion the act of conversation becomes so easy and light and fun. When people show enthuasiasm for your presence you feel confident and good, but when they don't it has the reverse effect. For many men, and most women, almost every single interaction is coloured by this enthusiasm. No wonder they don't understand social phobia.

[Anonymous No.15777044]

>>15776954
Would Asuka be into that? I think she might be.

[Anonymous No.15777075]

>>15776151
What’s the thing you know you should be doing?

[Anonymous No.15777123]

>>15777032
feeling sorry for yourself will only damage you further

[Anonymous No.15777163]

>>15777032
You are absolutely at a disadvantage but I think most people will learn to look past your “subaverage” nature if you get to know them anon. There are plenty of horrifically disfigured people who still have friends.

But, like the typical incel and incel-adjacent person you’re probably pretty normal but have distorted your self image through internet memes. Being a bit ugly is really not a big deal.
>inb4 nooooo I’m definitely the 0.00001% that’s three standard deviations away from average I’m definitely not acting out an irl version of that sponge bob episode where he has rancid breath and assumes he’s ugly

[Anonymous No.15777193]

My face and voice don't seem to match, and I think it surprises a lot of people/turns them off. I guess that's what my dating app experience suggests at least. Really sucks but what can ya do.

[Anonymous No.15777348]

On this most hallowed day of patriotism I'm thinking about an ominous 4th of July celebration I attended some years ago.

It was somewhere in New Hampshire in a parking lot where the congregants had assembled to view a fireworks show. Except a thunderstorm was stewing in the declining light of the horizon and you got the impression that the whole spectacle needed to be rushed to avoid its ravages.

Little did I know I was about to bear witness to a cataclysm. Before long thunder, lightening, fireworks twilight and a crimson moon joined in an apocalyptic symphony over that end times sky. The heavens appeared to be in an agony of transformation and anarchy and some latent and inerasable superstitious element that resides in us all told me that this was nothing short of an omen.

If you've seen fireworks before you don't need me to describe them to you. They're bright, they bang loudly, and they sparkle. Something entirely different happens when you combine a storm with fireworks. It's a reenactment of God's wrathful destruction of Sodom and Gomorra in fire and brimstone. It is a flashback to the early scenes of creation in which volcanoes and tidal waves clash incongruously. It is some unstoppable prophecy of making and unmaking.

Striking was the inflamed, angry moon, a ripe bloodshot warhead of annihilation that seemed watch furiously and judgmentally over the world.

Anyways the show ended and just about right as the fireworks stopped exploding and as if on cue a torrential downpour fell. You might conclude that it was merely, "cool." But I knew I had just bore witness to a terrible miracle of blood, fire and death.

[Anonymous No.15777861]

Are there any modern literary figures who heavily use and apply the theories of Debord or Baudrillard to modern events? They were both prophetic and I wish they were alive to see what was going on today.

[Anonymous No.15777916]

>>15775908
what's on your mind

[Anonymous No.15778345]

>>15775908
Life expects so much of us.

My best friend is in an abusive relationship, my brother might be on drugs harder than even coke now, all in the wake of an economic depression and escalating political violence. I don't know what the future holds and that scares me.

[Anonymous No.15778470]

Landlords are the most disgusting fucking scum on the face of the earth. I've had the misfortune of dating a few women whose fathers were landlords and developers. They were all absolute scum shit who didn't see their tenants as people. They also systematically avoided paying taxes through all sorts of scams. Every cent they lavished on their cunt daughters was a cent they stole from a fellow taxpayer who actually works for his money.

Bilking your own people out of their wealth should be considered treasonous for a generation or two, just to clear out all the built-up parasites in the attic of this society. They're become far too good at what they do and turned corruption into a hobby and a profession, not an occasional embellishment of some genuine business. The ratio of profit gained by corruption to profit gained by genuine business is probably at a theoretical sociological minimum.

I don't care what your abstract model of capitalism or supply and demand is, sometimes a society needs to purge its parasites, so they don't pass on their expert knowledge of parasitism techniques to their children.

[Anonymous No.15778490]

>>15778470
What should be done? Should people simply be given homes?

Ive thought we should rethink how we go about home ownership, like single wides should be the default home (can be bought for less than 50k) then nicer homes will become available as you move up on your career/earnings. Not this shit where everyone thinks they deserve a two story home for 300k.

Then again I've rented my whole adult life so wtf do I know.

[Anonymous No.15778515]

I just put 3k into Gap because Kanye signed. I hope it goes up.

My girlfriend is spending fourth of July at her family's house, they don't know about me, but only because if they did we would have to get married; she wants to get married and I want to wait a bit. We have only been dating 10.5 months. My biggest fear is becoming >>15776514 , but my girlfriend tells me she loves me. Sometimes I just feel like she says whatever she is feeling in the moment rather than any deeper processing of life and experience. It's just *sparkly butterfly feelings* -> "I love you."

I feel lonely, inadequate, and I am the happiest I have been in a while. A long while, I attribute it to working out and being proud of my body, even then my body isn't that great, but I've recaptured some essence of youth that was fading. I'm going to lose it again, but it's just nice to slow the fade.

I'm the happiest I've been in a long while, my future is promising, and I still want to die all the same.

[Anonymous No.15778523]

My youth is fading. I wonder how I'll feel when it's gone. The relative lack of attention and etiquette I receive already is pretty depressing and only makes what's left seem so vacuous - probably because it is.

[Anonymous No.15778551]

>>15776514
whatever you do, don't do it on the spur of the moment. the courts are designed to fuck you, give her all your money, and enslave you for life to pay her legal fees. do it cold and calculated over ten years if you have to, do it for your kids, but don't do anything stupid

family/divorce lawyers literally coach women on how to psychologically terrorize their husbands using proven methods like knowing that men are more easily provoked to anger and much more likely to say "cmon can't we just talk about this" and try to bypass the lawyers, so they provoke/manipulate them into seeming irrational, violent, frustrated, or dangerous.

one of the most common tactics i saw in my time was that they kidnap your kids (illegally abscond with them to their sister's place one state over, let's say), and then don't say anything, all very deliberately, because nine times out of ten the man in this situation will protest against the unfairness of it by trying to show up and "get his kids back" (talk some sense into the woman). what he doesn't realize is that the woman has been coached to reply as little as possible so that he digs himself into as deep a hole as possible. her initial kidnapping of the kids is easily forgotten or covered up as something else, meanwhile he ranted in the street and there are now 20 witnesses that he was "acting threatening." i've seen them do this and then call the cops and say they're "worried he will do something when he gets here," so the cops preemptively arrest the guy, which of course surprises him and pisses him off so he overreacts etc.

ALL OF THIS is planned and routine, the lawyer has run through it with hundreds of women before, in a long-term strategy to bleed you dry of money and crush you under the sheer unfairness of the system until you "settle" (sit and allow yourself to be humiliated by a mediator who is clearly on the wife's side, btw you're paying both the mediator's fees and the wife's lawyer fees as part of your "settlement," enjoy).

if you hate your wife you are in a very precarious situation, do everything in consultation with a lawyer, be fucking ice cold about it or she will use her massive handicap to do it to you first. once you've made the decision to evict her from your life, know that it's going to be a very long haul, talk to a lawyer, and then swear to yourself that you will never yell, scream, shout, throw things, touch her, etc.

talk to a lawyer first no matter what because "possession is 9/10ths of the law" is a real thing. i've seen numerous women withdraw all the family's money from a bank account (all earned by the man, since the woman was a stay at home mom) and just fuck off with it, and then use that money to pay her lawyer fees for years with no penalties, because the status of the money is what is in dispute IN the legal battles so she can just hold onto it (hence possession is 9/10ths)

marriage is a SCAM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-dzkjmNFeY

[Anonymous No.15778564]

>>15778551
btw as proof, lowtax's ex wife did this exact script to him a few weeks back. pic related. i didn't even know about stealing his money too, so it proves my point further that it's the standard script for every divorce lawyer.

he was crying on stream about it. why? because just to file the papers to begin an inquiry into what his wife did will take several months, and then that back and forth will take several more, so all she had to do was KIDNAP his children illegally and he can't see his kids for 6+ months. they know this, they know that almost no man will tolerate it and every man will try to go "wtf! i'm driving out there right now to sort this shit out!" and then cops will be waiting for them.

[Anonymous No.15778791]

Of course her opinions about politics and society come from fucking social network and mass media. Of course she decided to fuck half of the city after breaking up with her first boyfriend. Of course she’s an atheist (but believes in astrology, energies and reincarnation!); and finally, of course you are an idiot for thinking this one would deviate at least a little bit from the fucking script.
And you know what? I might as well settle with this one, because all the fucking girls I get to know are the same.
Jesus Christ, I don’t need some virginal and brilliant woman, just someone who doesn’t make me feel hopelessness the more and more I learn about her.
I hate myself. Men and women my age love this fucking lifestyle, while it just makes me want crawl into a hole and die.

Please, if any anon could say something to me, I would really appreciate it. I just feel like shit and don’t really know what to do.

[Anonymous No.15778826]

>>15778791
There is a woman out there you would respect. You just need to look elsewhere. Not dating apps. I'm sure there are chaste women out there who don't believe in getting their opinions from mass or social media. However, this only goes as far as them being a woman, then, yes they are subject to the usual pleasantries men experience with women.

[Anonymous No.15778827]

I'm just so tired of being used. But I don't have the power to be nuanced about it, all I have are blunt solutions that will probably make everything far less predictable. My life's alright I suppose. I read, I research, I talk to people. I don't really need to worry about a job since there's no chance I'm gonna find one anytime soon. I might just stick in school. Maybe go somewhere decent like Switzerland. But FUCK I feel like I'm on a ride I can't get off.

[Anonymous No.15778837]

>>15778791
I’m in the EXACT situation as you but I know what to do. When talking to my recently acquired blm supporting gf I’ve been regurgitating the Moldbug I’ve been reading. If you’re suspicious of Moldbug I’ll give you a quick rundown on one of his basic objectives: the demystification of modern political ideology. In this way he’s somewhat like Derrida, he shows why every ideology in modern democratic government is stupid and fruitless. And his critique is so forensic that normies like my gf accept what I’m saying as fact, which it is.

[Anonymous No.15778840]

>>15776514
>She said I’m the bronze medal
I would simply chimp out on the spot
keep your honour even if you have to get fucked over by a divorce court

[Anonymous No.15778844]

>>15776954

[Anonymous No.15778850]

>>15778791
She’s not worth your time, fuck her.

[Anonymous No.15778853]

>>15778827
>Maybe go somewhere decent like Switzerland.
I loved Switzerland when I went there
>But FUCK I feel like I'm on a ride I can't get off.
Listen to your gut. Don’t blindly follow it, but try to understand where it’s coming from and let that inform how you proceed.

[Anonymous No.15778868]

I want to be a stay at home mum but I'm 18 and I'm not with someone. I'm not sure what to do with myself, I'm good at maths so my teachers and family think I should go to uni to do it. I don't really see the point in going to university if I don't even want a career. I think I'm going to settle for something like a primary school teacher, think I'd end up suicidal doing physics or maths. Maybe try to find a partner that wants children in the next upcoming year but I doubt it'll happen. That's what's on my mind

[Anonymous No.15778883]

>>15778868
I would plow those fields in the name of God

[Anonymous No.15778887]

>>15778868
begone roastie and only come back when you are a mathematician. i will see you at various math conventions. regards.

[Anonymous No.15778963]

>>15778868
You are a unicorn

[Anonymous No.15779081]

How come Taleb never mentions Ludwig von Mises? Taleb always praises FA Hayek, who was Mises' student, and praises Hayek's influences, like Popper et al., but he never mentions Mises at all. Mises and Taleb seem to share a lot of the same ideas too.

[Anonymous No.15779137]

>twitch.tv/woke

Portland PD fuckin' people up live!

[Misfits (1961) No.15779167]

[Anonymous No.15779214]

I really want a cute gf but this town is a dump and so far I had zero progress whatsoever, sometimes you can find decent girls outside but I'm too much of a wimp to approach and also very little practice for it. Shit is hard

[Anonymous No.15779561]

Another friend from my group is getting married and im still a kissless virgin. Its sad and funny to think about it.

[Anonymous No.15779767]

I hate people complaining about love, relationships and sex, such effeminate faggots

[Anonymous No.15779808]

>>15775908
I have no personality of my own. Whenever I read a book, I suddenly turn around and start LARPing as a result. A quick skim of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and I'm suddenly overtaken by the frenzied confidence of a madman. But it always fades in the end. The books I read don't mix together into an individual personality, I empty out like a cup - ready to be refilled with the next thing I read and pose as.

[Anonymous No.15779877]

>>15779808
anon, being inspired by a book isn't something to be ashamed about. personality is a spook don't worry about it

[Anonymous No.15779921]

niggers

[Anonymous No.15780024]

>>15779808
There's a funny tweet about this, something along the lines of ''my personality is basically just emulating my favorite character from whatever series I'm watching rn''
>>15779877
Not everything is a spook.

[Anonymous No.15780155]

>>15780024
everyone's personality drastically changes based on their environment, social group, media they consume, how much they've eaten today. it's not worth it to get upset about not having a personality. sounds like the anon is just depressed, every person has a personality. i knew a girl with schizoaffective disorder and her detatched, muted energy vampire personality was still a personality.

[Anonymous No.15780210]

[Anonymous No.15780324]

I've had a huge fetish for cheerleaders ever since I was a kid. A few nights ago, I had a dream I was back at college. In the dream, I went to the field where the cheerleaders were practicing, removed my clothes, and began furiously pleasuring myself. I'm extremely sexually repressed, and I think it's an expression of my unconscious desires to go berserk in front of a group of hot cheerleaders.

[Anonymous No.15780388]

3D women cannot love you.

[Anonymous No.15780415]

>>15776054
Your first mistake is comparing sex to taking a shit, though I understand why you would.

[Anonymous No.15780421]

>>15780388
Neither can 2D women so what are we to do then?

[Anonymous No.15780423]

>>15775908
You have entered puberty, only when you have striped a female character of her clothes and then masturbated over her dead body.

[Anonymous No.15780444]

>>15775908
I want to get into politics and culture but I don't know where to start.

[Anonymous No.15780478]

>>15775908
I don’t know whether to read postmodern theory, or just learn certain topics and move on

[Anonymous No.15780517]

>>15780421
they can anon, but first you need to learn to love yourself.

[Anonymous No.15780565]

>>15776093

[Anonymous No.15780623]

>>15780565
These films hold up so well after 80+ years. I'd nut in Myna Loy a thousand times over, and she's not even my #1.

[Anonymous No.15780977]

>>15780155
So your mutable character is still character?

[Anonymous No.15781166]

I'm desperately looking for a fresh and captivatingly written book but I can't make a thread because anons would tell me to fuck off to r, so if some kind litanon sees this I'd love to hear your recommandations

[Anonymous No.15781313]

>>15776083
>>15776019
This post said absolutely nothing at all.
>Then you push them on it, try to unravel what their ''traditionalism'' actually consists of, and it's always, without fail, about wanting to go back to the security and sense of community they imagined they'd have in the 50s or so
Why is that bad?
Drug use, communist fantasies, divorce rates, single mothers, feminism, abandonment of the basic morality maintained by Christianity for two thousand years, deterioration of community spirit, all of these things were less present in the 50s. Even what is considered as art has gone very severely downhill since then.
I don't think I've seen anyone mention the Enlightenment was a mistake.

[Anonymous No.15781327]

my oneitis prefers the movie ending of I am legend to the book one... wtf do I do bros

[Anonymous No.15781339]

>>15775908
I wish that i where a dog, a worm or any other creature than a man, something that has no concept of a "self". All other creatures get to live in blissful stupidity , unaware of their mortality. Only we are cursed to build our minds,knowledge and bodies only so that, when we reach our peak , we fall into decay and death.
I think of death and fill with terror, i don't want to know!

[Anonymous No.15781361]

>>15778470
Agreed

[Anonymous No.15781365]

>>15780623
They are great. Just goes to show that fashion and witty alcoholism go as well together as peanutbutter and chocolate.

Myrna was gorgeous. I also have a big thing for Ginger Rogers, but honestly I love Myrna's characters more and am more likely to idly fantasize about being William Powell.

[Anonymous No.15781380]

>>15781313
We can truly never go back, too much has changed. And anyway, you could buy all sorts of crazy uppers and downers over the counter, abstract expressionism, the beats, hard bop, and rock n roll were the burgeoning artistic movements, there was the Korean war and paranoia about nukes. It wasn't all tranquil suburban life and submissive Christian wives

[Anonymous No.15781470]

>>15780388
>>15780517
Die you simulacrum, I'll burn you at the stake

[Anonymous No.15781485]

Please help me I don't think this is helping me, I need to actually read not to do this shit

[Anonymous No.15781495]

>>15781470
>he thinks it's a simulacrum and not a demonic entity
But do go on and tell me how you plan to burn a simulacrum alive

[Anonymous No.15781515]

Take the day to day life pill, be content in your normal routine and worry not of the images the flash on your Twitter feed.

[Anonymous No.15781542]

>>15781327
kill her

[Anonymous No.15781565]

>>15781485
Sorry anon, I wish I could

[Anonymous No.15781575]

>>15781380
>We can truly never go back, too much has changed.
Then our civilisation will decline ever further, and rapidly.
Nations like Japan and China still follow a basic traditional family life orientated society with clear gender differences within modern technological societies. Interestingly they do this without ever being Christian.

In leaving behind our church orientated society we have thrown the baby out with the bath water, and equated anything vaguely traditional with the stupidity of magical superstitions, including morality as a concept or the idea that society requires anyone within in it to take adult responsibility for themselves.
Reality itself has become a notion of backward primitive delusion, as if thinking there is some coherent structure to life is similar to believing in witchcraft.

[Anonymous No.15781582]

>>15781575
> Japan and China still follow a basic traditional family life orientated societ
Oh no... you actually think this.... the absolute state of westerners. Come to China before trying to say that.

[Anonymous No.15781585]

>>15781485
Sorry anon, I wish I could

[Anonymous No.15781616]

>>15781575
>Nations like Japan and China still follow a basic traditional family life orientated society with clear gender differences within modern technological societies. Interestingly they do this without ever being Christian.
Bruh.....

Japan is one of the most degenerate places on Earth, Tokyo ranks right up there with Tel aviv in degeneracy. No single nation, culture or civilisation is escaping the burden of technology. Read Spengler

[Anonymous No.15781712]

>>15780210
lmao

[Anonymous No.15781837]

>>15781582
People are far more concerned with marriage and family traditions. What are you saying?

[Anonymous No.15781877]

>>15781616
Crime is near nonexistant in Japan, and their culture of perfectionism is clearly outperforming western sensibilities in various ways. Many women in Japan have never heard of feminism, and have no issue with completely normal female behaviour like the tragic fantasists of the west.

[Anonymous No.15781940]

>>15775908
Cliches that never fail to hit you?
>A line is repeated throughout the story, it's final usage recontextualises all the previous uses and makes me emotional.
Is there a word for that? Planting and payoff I guess. I just love seeing things come full circle.

[Anonymous No.15781966]

>>15781837
Have you never seen how coldly Chinese treat each other? No community at all, no altruism, they just see everyone as their co-workers in the giant business that is their nation.

[Anonymous No.15782009]

>>15775918
Basically this, I never think about anything new. Just eternal self-loathing and speculation about the future of mankind but in changing contexts

[Anonymous No.15782010]

this is not a healthy way to live

[Anonymous No.15782032]

>>15776093
>Women used to look so bored back in the day
Wouldn't you?

Sure, they do crazy retarded shit today, but at least they have a semblance of self-determination.

[Anonymous No.15782062]

>>15781966
Yes, it's a country that is very used to widespread death, that has endured a recent near apocalypse. But part of what has allowed them to survive 10s of millions of deaths and the collapse of industry is a basic notion of traditional familial responsibility in their culture. They carry on as a nation and their quality of life has improved a lot.

[Anonymous No.15782072]

>>15782032
>semblance of self-determination.
It's an illusion.

[Anonymous No.15782077]

>>15782072
That's why I said Semblance, you crackhead. They believe they have near-complete control of themselves and therefore are at least less bored.

[Anonymous No.15782092]

>>15775908
no gf now, no gf tomorrow, no gf ever

[Anonymous No.15782211]

>>15782077
How dare speak ill of my crack habit

[Anonymous No.15782220]

>>15782211
>*How dare YOU
Maybe I should smoke less crack

[Anonymous No.15782239]

>>15781877
People not getting married and havibg children is an even bigger problem over there wtf are you talking about.

[Anonymous No.15782258]

I don’t want to feel rage, I hate the thoughts I get when I do.

[Anonymous No.15782279]

>>15778853
My gut is telling me to choose fire

[Anonymous No.15782293]

>>15781313
My post was directed at traditionalist larpers. Spengler or Ebola wouldn't tell you that we peaked in the 50s.
>Even what is considered as art has gone very severely downhill since then.
It really hasn't.

[Anonymous No.15782356]

>>15782239
Yes the birthrate is very low, slightly less than even western countries. But they also have a high rate of virginity in men and women, where the west believes in total indulgence and promiscuity. The rate of single motherhood is half that of a nation like the UK. The society has a much greater appreciation for motherhood and family roles.
The events unfolding in Japan aren't damaging their society in the way he have damaged ours.

[Anonymous No.15782769]

Coombrain is just a word that internet moral guardians use. I won't stop cooming.

[Anonymous No.15782843]

>>15781877
People are not getting married, are becoming literal pure materialist hermits, homosexuality and degenerate sexual deviance is rampant, not to mention the culture surrounding technological escapism like VR. Its a fucking modernistic hellhole

[Anonymous No.15782864]

>>15782356
Sub-replacement fertility is one of the most important factors in the collapse of civilisations, e.g. Hellenistic greece after the death of Alexander marked by rapid urbanisation and immigration collapsed the birth rate and subsequently caused the complete collapse of the culture and civilisation of ancient greece after Alexandria was annexed by the Roman empire

[Anonymous No.15782865]

>>15782356
They're virgins because they're forever alone and spend all their time at work or home alone, not because of any strong moral values, you retard.

[Anonymous No.15782875]

>>15782865
This. They're virgins because they live in a modernist consumerist hellhole, nothing else

[Anonymous No.15782911]

>>15781575
But most people do believe in morality and responsibility

[Anonymous No.15782932]

>>15781313
>Drug use, communist fantasies, divorce rates, single mothers, feminism, abandonment of the basic morality maintained by Christianity for two thousand years, deterioration of community spirit, all of these things were less present in the 50s. Even what is considered as art has gone very severely downhill since then.
Sometimes I wonder if people really care for those things such as religion. Mostly I think that people just paid lipservice to them, regardless of where in time.

[Anonymous No.15783015]

>>15781313
you need to improve your historical education

[Anonymous No.15783033]

>>15775908
Holy fuck Shakespeare is awesome. I'm *just* literate enough to be able to read steadily without struggling or looking up words constantly and it's like a water log ride down river rapids that is constantly at risk of falling (i.e. stopping) but so much fun once you have a handle on the grammar/vocabulary. HOLY FUCK I LOVE BEING SMART!

[Anonymous No.15783228]

>https://nypost.com/2020/07/03/new-black-lives-matter-wave-will-lead-to-more-black-homicides-than-first/

NYC had the most June shootings since 1996. That's gangsta! Are the good times here again?

[Anonymous No.15783282]

I don't believe in light. We see things because they just exist in and of themselves, not because light bounces off of them or whatever the materialist jew will have you believe.

[Anonymous No.15783363]

I haven't had an erection outside the confines of my bedroom for a while, years maybe. Even when I masturbate, it's not because I have an erection. First I look at porn, then go from there. It all seems so perfunctory. It's just something to do, like taking out the garbage. When my therapist asked me how often, I lied and said every other day. Really it's every day. If I'm bored, sometimes twice. I made a point not to do it yesterday and today. I went to the beach earlier and saw a woman and nearly got an erection. The problem is in the real world there's just nothing I can do about it. Just a momentary rush of blood. That's why I keep it in the bedroom.

[Anonymous No.15783380]

>>15783282
Based, all light and the sun is is a manifestation of our will as the metaphor for truth and enlightenment

[Anonymous No.15783390]

>>15783282
And yet camera obscura???

And yet color changing with light intensity and filters?
And yet rainbow???????????????????

[Anonymous No.15783424]

>>15776144
use ublock origin

[Anonymous No.15783450]

>>15782932
As an Israeli who sees hasidics all the time, it's half half. Most of the hasidics are shitty people just like you or me, and they have a justification for their shittines so it's even worse at times. On the other hand, they have a clear avenue for spiritual fulfillment if they wish to search down that path while most atheists are spiritually childish and mute.

[Anonymous No.15783467]

girlfriend says she's pregnant. almost sure she's not. I hate her, need to break up soon

[Anonymous No.15783617]

>>15783467
Buy a test???????

[Anonymous No.15783809]

>>15783617
need to wait until the period skips a good couple of days

[Anonymous No.15784185]

>>15783363
Lying to your therapist about something as innocuous as masturbation kinda defeats the point of even going to therapy in the first place

[Anonymous No.15784261]

>>15782258
This, I get rape thoughts/"urges" when I get angry.

[Anonymous No.15785336]

BUMPE

[Anonymous No.15785431]

>>15784261
Do you angrily masturbate? Or do you just angrily sit and think about masturbating

[Anonymous No.15785446]

I find myself thinking about joining the service more and more out of trade school. Just to see what they see. To finally have my own story to tell, to live a life that's interesting. To have events and people to remember, break up the non-stop day to day.
Or is this retarded?

[Anonymous No.15785460]

>>15783363
I understand lying to a therapist about something like that, it might be worth saying every day but at least be honest about as much as you are able to. As long as they clearly understand you’re not a threat to people or whatever then you can tell them things like frequent masturbation, that’s not an unusual phenomenon and your therapist could help with that. If you see a person in public and get a boner though, and if you don’t feel good about that, then tell your therapist about this as well.

[Anonymous No.15785466]

>>15785431
I angrily mastrubate to canons/thots while listening to angry music.

[Anonymous No.15785697]

I do not think I am the only one who has the choice between commiting suicide or living far, far away from society. Concerning loved ones, persons who have considered these choices would have to live up to the expectations set before them by said loved ones until their prime concerns are not, or at least loosely fixed on the person's who have made said considerations.

[Anonymous No.15785865]

All I see is horribleness… all around me. Things are not going well. I do not feel good. I’m finishing school but I am poor. I’m starting a business but it is taking a year. I am trying to get a job but it is taking months. I try to leave the country and they wouldn’t let me. I try to get a girlfriend and she doesn’t want to see me again. I write a book but no one wants to publish it.

[Anonymous No.15785922]

>>15783282
Yeah I’m sorry anon but this is prime monkey IQ posting

[Anonymous No.15786028]

I've noticed a destructive cycle in my life. First, I try to give some structure to my life, and cultivate some virtues and suppress my vices. Then, just as I'm at the highest point, patting myself on the back for being such an exalted individual, the animal-within creeps from behind, takes over, and commits all sorts of meanness and vulgarities that I'd sworn to avoid. Debased and humiliated by myself, I again take over with more force and strength, trying to imprison the animal this time for good. The animal then, at first seemingly defeated, comes back even stronger than before and levels my semblance of order and control to the ground, reminding me that I could never win over it. The humiliating aspect of it notwithstanding, it takes a great deal of energy to get my life back on course. I don't know how to stop this, and I don't know how long I can go on like this until I finally give up.

[Anonymous No.15786037]

>>15778791
I thought the same but I was wrong. Best girls I meet are through good jobs and outdoor hobbies

[Anonymous No.15786047]

>>15778868
Will you marry me?

[Anonymous No.15786298]

Think I might try to eat like a Templar Knight for the next few weeks. Sparingly eating meat, fasting (but still eating vegetables, fish, eggs, dairy, etc). My diet has been really messed up due to medication and prior to that COVID so it will be fun to lose the weight I've gained and be somewhat historically experimental.

So, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday will be my fast days where I eat what I'm allowed but with the aforementioned restrictions. Free to eat whatever the other days though I will be replacing some foods with others. I don't eat pork due to liking pigs and I don't eat cabbage due to just disliking its taste. I may try to make a potage using some cabbage, however. Using other things to cover the taste.

Also bread. I have not made bread for quite some time. Should be fun.

[Anonymous No.15787180]

>>15781877
Majority of crime are not reported to police in japan.

[Anonymous No.15787255]

>>15776054
>Do "normal" people enjoy/not mind sex scenes in movies?
they love it more than real sex, because you can enjoy it without getting up from your couch.

[Anonymous No.15787270]

>>15778523
your level of skills, abilities, and status, should have increased while your youth has decreased. Ideally, both lines on a graph cross each other at age 27.

[Anonymous No.15787780]

Not trying to be an edgelord, but god I really hate people. I really don't want to. Because of my philosophical and religious beliefs I want to be kind and compassionate to everybody but I can't help it. I'd even somehow succeeded in being more kind and accepting in the last few months, but for some reason my misanthropy has returned again. What can I do to overcome it?

[Anonymous No.15787792]

>>15787780
you sound like a huge faggot. just say youre a narcissist and go

[Anonymous No.15787821]

>>15787792
I really tried not to sound that way, but really how can you say things like this without coming across that way? I agree I'm probably narcissistic to some extent. Some close family members are. I can see it in them and I don't want to be like that. But again, as much as I try I can't help it.

[Anonymous No.15787851]

>>15785446
Yes. Army is boring. If you want a story travel to a war zone on your own.

[Anonymous No.15787852]

>>15787821
life isn't hard. be kind be humble be thankful. unless youre like 30 years old i wouldnt worry

[Anonymous No.15787856]

>>15787255
I don't. They're annoying and carry no weight. Just a few minutes of awkward watching that 99% doesn't change the story or the characters at all. I usually skip them.

Seen moment, but evangelion is the only show I watched and didn't skip the cringy sexual moments, because they played them straight.

[Anonymous No.15787861]

>>15787852
See, I already know that. I appreciate that you're trying to help, but I'm already convinced of that. My dislike to people is more on instinctual level and I'm trying hard to suppress it.

[Anonymous No.15787956]

Recommend me some books, please. Ideally I'd like some 21st century fiction focused on character development, but anything works. You can even recommend me young adult or someone's horror blog if you think it's good.
>inb4 mishima, dostoevsky, tolstoy, mccarthy, borges, et al.
I've pretty much read all of the "big" authors that would be in the recommended section, and some I just have no interest in. I want something I couldn't find just by googling myself.

[Anonymous No.15788181]

I've decided to stop wasting my life for at least the rest of the year. Who will join me?

[Anonymous No.15788227]

>>15788181
>I've decided to stop wasting my life for at least the rest of the year
What are you going to do?

[Anonymous No.15788322]

I've had this image on my laptop for years, need to get rid of it.

[Anonymous No.15788331]

>>15787780
some folks are trying you. you can be literally God roaming the earth and people want to see you on the cross.

[Anonymous No.15788350]

I've seen every DanielSL video at least 30 times.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHsGO8a8WOE&

[Anonymous No.15788358]

>>15787780
People suck and deserve every ounce of hate you feel for them. Fuck them all for real, nobody will repay your kindness. If you really want to be compassionate then you have to accept that people will often be the absolute worst and become fine with that. If you are going to be kind to everyone then do it for the few good souls remaining in the world.

[Anonymous No.15788365]

>>15787956
Ursula, left hand of darkness
Ursula, the dispossessed

[Anonymous No.15788482]

I finally found a goal in my life that justifies and simplifys no-fap. I want to cum hands free. I don't know if it's still possible in my age and body form but it's engaging enough to make it a long term goal.

[Anonymous No.15788501]

>>15788482
in 2 years you'll coom just by high-fiving your buddy

[Anonymous No.15788569]

I'm just trying to stay single for the rest of my life since I've done it for it's entirety so far. I'm 24 and I wasted my youth shitposting with an ever-changing small group of buddies. The last close female friend I had was in 8th grade and despite the pain it has caused mt over the years, I've come to terms with the fact that I'll never see her again. I just want freedom from this animalistic urge to breed.


I've tried taking my Catholic faith more seriously, but that hit a rock so now I'm just trying to read because I'm starting to realize I might make a self-fulfilling prophecy true if I go down that route. It also makes me pissed at God for making me so autistic and expecting me to be happy with rubbing my face in the dirt. I don't want that. I'm clearly not meant to be a priest or religious since I know I don't feel especially called to it, but at the same time I hate the idea of erotic love and I don't want it in my life. I can love all men as brothers and sisters of Christ and I can love my friends and family, but I can't love a woman, despite being attracted to them. It's just too much to ask from me. I guess that's why I'm so addicted to pornography and masturbation: you get the high of sexual release without the feeling of love attached to it, but even then it feels empty after the deed is done and that just makes me regret my degenerate behavior. The next best thing is taking Stoicism more seriously and just giving up the pretense of giving a shit about the Church because deep down I do care and cherish my relationship with God and my love of the Church, but I'm not willing to fall into anything approaching a trap, which is what romantic love is to me. To all the Catholic (and I guess Orthobros) anons out there, are there any good recommendations on any books to read or things to do to get rid of this feeling? I'm so conflicted right now it hurts. I'd rather follow a simulacrum of the "Truth" if that means I won't have to deal with that one part of me I hate the most.

[Anonymous No.15788622]

>>15788569
at 24 you still have your youth on your side. you got some growing up to do. reading is not meant to be a substitution for love. it's supposed to be accompanying activity. fiction books might be manuals, aphrodisiacs, or contemplations of love.

[Anonymous No.15788648]

>>15788622
>reading is not meant to be a substitution for love
Not that anon but some people never experience love throughout their whole life. Atleast when reading, you can somewhat see how it looks.

[Anonymous No.15788701]

>>15788622
How do I come to terms with the fact that I'm a human? I think that's what I'm fundamentally trying to ask in that stream of consciousness rant. I have this idea of what it means to be the most virtuous person in my head, but it clearly doesn't correspond with reality in the least. What are some ways I can grow as a human being? If I let myself lobotomizing out the most intimate part of myself, I'll still be human but there will be more stunting rather than growth.

[Anonymous No.15788733]

>>15788701
being human is not something that is beneath you. nor above you. taking the christian message serious is a good start. we are all sinners, no matter if we choose a cleric life or not. do something for your neighbours. feed the hungry. teach the unschooled. dress the naked. you'll make friends and more along the way.

[Anonymous No.15788740]

>>15788701
There is no escaping your humanity either way, may as well embrace it (or resign yourself to it). To me, it is quite bizarre that you are still hurt over a friendship that ended 10 years ago. Move on with your life.

[Anonymous No.15788793]

>>15788740
>>15788733

It's not the friendship ending that hurt me. They come and go and I've been used to it for a while. She was a nice girl and I hope she's doing well in life rn. It's the fact that ever since I've never been as close to a woman as I was to her. That was about the time I developed a porn addiction and just now have I really been able to break somewhat free from it. It was during this time that I really associated love and lust with each other and I starting hating both, even though I was more than willing to give in to my lustful desires, yet whenever I had a crush on a girl, I would make sure to run away from her, not just because I felt inadequate, but also because I really felt like I only saw her as an object. Thus I've basically have been only been hanging out with male friends because I'm not attracted to them romantically so these feelings of guilt and self-hatred never pop up. It's really just within this quarantine period that I have realized how foolish I've been. I've messed up my brain so much, I'm not even sure if I can love properly at this point. I just want to do some sort of penance for not just me, but the women I've wronged by reducing them to just tools for my selfish self-gratification.

[Anonymous No.15788802]

>>15788793
Damn dude, go to therapy

[Anonymous No.15788899]

>>15788793
Everyone uses each other for personal satisfaction. The point of relationships is to find someone that you enjoy being used by and vice versa. If theres no give and take you're just acquaintances. I had a girl friend like yours for 2-3 years in my early 20's. Now 26 and haven't spoken to her in several years. I just take solace in the fact that our friendship was a better connection than most people will experience in their lives.
It's important to remember that relationships are dependent on time and place more than anything. Prolonging a relationship past the point it feels natural is sure to cause internal strife because you have to force yourself to act in a way you don't actually think feels right.
Time is an illusion anyway, as long as it happened you can think back, reflect, and embrace what once was and will always be.

[Anonymous No.15788952]

>>15788501
I hope I can get the job done before 2 years. But it takes what it takes I guess.

[Anonymous No.15789162]

>>15788899
I once had a friend and we were close as fuck. Used to play games every day, hang out, basically he was like a brother. Then he slowly got weird over time. He got mad that I had a girlfriend but showed no interest in girls himself and then became a massive weeb, and over time, he basically quit school and everything else and became a severe smoker and alcoholic, and more recently a Nazi. I don't talk to him but my friend does and apparently he's completely batshit. All he does is talk about Nazi shit now and lolis.
Sometimes, it's good to appreciate the friendships you had and move on.

[Anonymous No.15789270]

>>15789162
Did you try to talk with him or just ditched him in the gutter?

[Anonymous No.15789537]

>>15789270
We talked for a while. He kept getting combative out of anything. Just saying you didn't like a song he liked would result in a 1hr rant of him trying to "objectively" prove to you how your taste was wrong. It got to the point where I no longer wanted to talk about anything because he did not care about discussing anything, he would just look for reasons to argue. Even if we were watching a show and talking about girls, saying I liked one that he didn't would become a massive issue that he yelled about. We were basically some of the most popular kids in our school, and he went from being normal and having a ton of friends to turning into a turboautist that no one will talk to because he turns everything into a debate.

[Anonymous No.15789556]

>>15789537
Oh, I forgot to add, he was also very insistent on pushing drugs and drinking on other people. I don't do either, and one day when he wanted to kick me out because I refused to do drugs with him I just never spoke to him again. Fuck that. Not to mention he would always look for reasons to belittle any other friend I had, and especially my family and girlfriend(s). I'm surprised I lasted as long as I did.

[Anonymous No.15789605]

>>15789537
>>15789556
Damn, he was(is) really angry person.