Write what's on your mind

[Anonymous No.14846948]

[Anonymous No.14846951]

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! NO!

[Anonymous No.14846963]

>>14846948
Great pic. It's as if I'd like to do something, help someone, something, anything, ..but I don't know what.

[Anonymous No.14846966]

>>14846948
I don’t subscribe to the idea that black people are purely victims of circumstance or subhumans, but induced social degeneracy was tested on them first.

Where was abortion first promoted? Where was the family first broken up? What part of society first got the productivity poison that is government gibs? Where is policing and prosecution aggressively targeted to create an underclass of citizens without rights? And what is the target audience of media promoting violence and encouraging disrespect towards society? The black community. Because it was always segregated from the rest and seen as expendable.

This is not to say any black individual is not culpable for crimes or lack of social contribution. It is to say that black people were chosen as an easy target to test social breakdown needed to break and replace the system, and white people are next to degenerate (and it’s in progress)

[Anonymous No.14846968]

I'm going to shill for a Youtube channel I like (but have no affiliation with):
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCA_f3kSgF7Dejj6lOgbAVnQ

He does really chill and well-produced history videos, but also not condescending or assuming the viewer is a half-ass. Better than most college lectures imho.

Also this guy, who does incredibly high quality theatre of the mind/radioplay content with old weird fiction and horror stories, but only gets like 500 views a video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SyT6Xga0Eo

[Anonymous No.14846969]

>>14846948
Men have vestigial nipples to symbolize the feminine in each man.

[Anonymous No.14846974]

>>14846966
Everyone knows this

[Anonymous No.14846985]

>>14846948
I know what to do, but I don’t do it.

[Anonymous No.14846986]

queries are so ridiculous. they're as bad as job applications. everyone is a snowflake. and why do they put all this shit about their dogs and husband and how much they love baking? i don't care. give me the relevant information i need to query you and let's be professional. i have product, you sell product as a middle-man. let's be real.

i'm just going down the alphabet and sending to everyone who seems like they might bite. the unwarranted sense of self importance on these agents...

[Anonymous No.14846992]

Any other permavirgins find that as they get older the mere idea of sex becomes harder and harder to believe in? For me it’s become a completely fantastical notion, like on the same level as being able to fly or shoot lightning from your hands. If you told me sex was just a giant a meme and my that people actually reproduced by budding I might believe you.

[Anonymous No.14847008]

>>14846992
When I was in high school I was always surprised when I heard about students having sex or doing drugs. I’m just never in those types of situations, because I don’t seek them out

[Anonymous No.14847009]

>>14846948
i want to be able to make art

[Anonymous No.14847015]

>>14846966

The African American community needs Catholicism, they need to abandon thug culture and degenerate anti family values that have been instilled in their culture. The church is a refuge for humanity, and through Jesus Christ there can be healing of peoples

[Anonymous No.14847083]

>>14847008
>having sex or doing drugs
Same here but I'm 25

[Anonymous No.14847152]

What other websites and forums do you guys visit?

I need to stop coming here so often but I can't find anywhere better to discuss most topics of interest.

For example, no matter what you want to say about /lit/ there's no doubt it's a FAR better alternative to r/books or goodreads.

[thiskillsthedarkelf No.14847287]

>>14847152
I feel like if you give up 4chan you might as well go all out and get off the internet, become productive.

[Anonymous No.14847343]

>>14847287
Were you doing a quest thread on /tg/ or something?

[TweekGeek !WegkZP4tiw No.14847348]

>>14846948
I'm lonely. That's the long and the short of it.

[thiskillsthedarkelf No.14847403]

>>14847343
When you live in a simulation every thread is a quest thread.

[Anonymous No.14847964]

My life is incredibly simple these days.
>wake up 6:30
>laying in bed and breakfast till I have to be at work at 8
>work till 5:30-6, head home
>distract myself till gym at 7
>food prep after gym till 9:30 or so
>distract myself till bed at 10:30

I can’t tell if I like it or not. I don’t really do anything, but I’m not sure I want to. But it seems sad to think this is all it will be for the next 40 years. Need to find something to do in the mean time.

[Anonymous No.14848049]

it's the season

[Anonymous No.14848061]

>>14847964
I'm sure you'll find some adventures along the way, anon. Life is never quite that predictable

[Anonymous No.14848196]

I swear there is something special about the air of the night. Every time I go outside of my bedroom very late at night I feel like I'm in contact with something higher than myself, even if I'm just taking the trash out.

[Anonymous No.14848238]

>>14848061
I used to be worried about my life. Then my parents died and I just never heard from my extended family ever again. After about 10 years of being completely isolated I met a homeless alcoholic women and had a relationship with her, but we never had sex because she had been raped and was weird about it. Later she died of throat cancer. Back when I was 22 I could've never predicted that.

[Anonymous No.14848377]

>>14846948
I am quite contempt at having alzheimers disease unlike my younger self. It used to be that every disease I would be informed of would make me uneasy and unable to operate normally, but when I heard of alzheimers, and when my memories start escaping me, I would always have wished for any disease that wasn't this. But my wanting to inspire loved ones would soon change my feelings towards this disease. If whatever this disease brings is inevitable I would rather accept it with a smile, even if it means shitting in diapers and losing almost every function of my brain.

[Anonymous No.14848553]

>>14846948
These marble statues they made over 2000 years ago were absolute peak human art. Just look at her eyebrows and mouth.

It's just awe inspiring.

[Anonymous No.14848613]

Is being tranny basically living out autogynephilia fetish?

[Anonymous No.14848629]

>>14846948
An unfocused mind is no better then an empty one.

[Anonymous No.14848653]

I feel like I've been sad for so long that I've come to enjoy it. Will there ever be a happy ending?

[Anonymous No.14848666]

>>14848653
You seem to enjoy sadness so yeah.

[Anonymous No.14848670]

>>14848653
Sounds like a happy ending would make you sad

[Anonymous No.14848712]

>>14848377
*Content

[Anonymous No.14848729]

>>14846963
Help yourself.

[Anonymous No.14848789]

the world is going to an end soon

or is it just me

[Anonymous No.14848811]

>>14848789
mass media and especially internet are perfect for amplifying mass hysteria to a degree unseen since middle ages

[Anonymous No.14849015]

>>14848729
Talmudic advice, anon. If I don't, who will? Rabbi Akiva, I think..

[Anonymous No.14849019]

>>14848789
The world isn't going to end but it's probably going to be a bit less fun for a time.

[Anonymous No.14849077]

I was born into chaos. I wish I was never there. Eventually I crawled far away when I was strong enough, but my mind was already ruined. There was no help before. There is now, but it's not enough. I can't put it out. I'm burning from the inside out. I don't want to be arrested again. Obliterated mess. Screaming and hitting does nothing.

[Anonymous No.14849106]

Fun things are fun.

[Anonymous No.14849120]

At the core of humanity is the desire to destroy.

[Anonymous No.14849144]

slowly starting to get over my ex

[Anonymous No.14849151]

>>14849106
You're fun

[Anonymous No.14849158]

>>14849106
what my phone sees when i notice a good post while browsing 4chins on a break

[Anonymous No.14849159]

>>14846948
I need to COOOOOOOOOOOM

[Anonymous No.14849420]

>>14848377
That third photo makes me think of that wojak image with him sucking the dick on his face.

[Anonymous No.14849805]

I hate red lights. I think that compassion is horrifyingly vain if it does not lead to concrete acts of kindness. I feel mortified because my existence is so internal and subjective that what little flashes make it outside inspire nothing more than middling pity in others. I know that I am going to binge 8000 calories worth of sugar and fat tonight but the thought doesn't cause me to feel any guilt or disgust even on an intellectual level. My feelings have flatlined but I have no problems laughing or being a pleasant person around my friends. I don't know. Everything is a mess. The discontinuity separating the different stages of my life and the disassociation are too stark to make sense of anything.

[Anonymous No.14849813]

>>14849805
>I know that I am going to binge 8000 calories worth of sugar and fat tonight
That's why god invented tall hard to reach cupboards. Sweet stuff is always in arms reach and it serves other people more than us.

[Anonymous No.14849870]

I cannot accept love.

[Anonymous No.14849889]

>>14846966
>>14847015
the real blackpill

[Anonymous No.14849919]

I have mushrooms in my balls

[Anonymous No.14849921]

Anime has really fucked up my perception of what it means to be strong. Like yeah sure I could go to the gym and do squats, but is it going to allow me to jump fifteen feet in the air? No? Lame.

[Anonymous No.14849939]

>>14849921
To add it’s also made me more interested in endurance activities because it actually is possible to run for a hundred miles for example.

[Anonymous No.14850003]

>>14846948
I wonder what we will believe politically in the future. The thing that strikes me is that communism was supposed to win. Communism was the child of prophecy; to have a world free of the slavery which has characterized all human existence. Seems like all of post-modernism is a great outcry against our culture for not delivering on the great promise which somehow kept those Victorian workers toiling in obedience.

What was life without work supposed to look like anyway? It's fascinating how no concept of heaven has ever achieved universality or risen above the accusation of being boring. We clearly have no capacity for seeing the promised land from this vantage point.

So much of society toils without hope for this life or the next. The only duct-tape holding us all together is a monthly wage and a 24 hour news cycle. God knows what will happen when both disappear.

[Anonymous No.14850499]

not regretting but lamenting my having learned Latin. once the classics are read, there's little left worth studying, and less which is enjoyable.

cur ego perdideram tot tempora? namque Latini
perlecti libri me docuere nihil.

[Anonymous No.14850541]

>>14850499
I am an autist classicist too but to ignore medieval, renassiance, neo-classical lit is just dumb.

[Anonymous No.14850639]

>>14846992
If you don't have it right away it can corrupt you. I didn't lose mine until college but I obsessed over it once I got it...made me into a loser.

[Anonymous No.14850640]

>>14847964
what do you do for work?

[Anonymous No.14851196]

>>14849144
how?
goin on 5 years here
no respite

[Anonymous No.14851551]

>>14846948
I wake up to her calls, the familiar glow of my phone the only light in my dusky apartment. Every day I believe I’m losing her, subtle queues in her speech, in her mannerisms telling the story of our breakup in full. A painting on the wall of our relationship that should never have been begun

Yet she calls me, and I see genuine adoration in that face I’ve grown to love. I think her emotionally crippled like me, down to the subtle queues of boredom and dispassionate replies. Yet she cries when I speak of the possibility of our separation.

There is no subtlety in her, no room for deceit. She’s not even old enough to drive, let alone live with me. Yet the days pass, and I can sense legitimate happiness in her voice when we speak, an entire lifetime over the pale glow of video chat.

We’re creatures of this modern age, brought together in a passion of electrons scattered to the distant horizon. We’ve only been _together_ the once yet it still feels like an eternity wrought into the stone of our lives.

I don’t know how much longer this fractaline relationship will last, but I hope to whatever deity brought us together that it persists into the gray years of old age.

[Anonymous No.14851662]

I'm getting increasingly sick of computers and how they seem to be getting worse and worse every year wherever you look. Everything that used to work no longer does, and that which does work doesn't make up for what is now broken. Sometimes I wonder if there's some Ted K. cultists working for Microsoft, Apple, and various Linux projects and they're intentionally breaking it all.

[Anonymous No.14851683]

>>14846992
Speaking to my heart right there. I can't even imagine myself having it at all.

[Anonymous No.14851723]

Unsure whether I could strive for ultimate mental gain by completely avoiding women and sexual relationships with them, or engage and try to harness man's most fundamental impulse to drive myself further.

[Anonymous No.14851730]

[Anonymous No.14851792]

>>14848613
yes. the irony is that chopping off ur balls kills ur libido, so they lose all sex drive to do anything with living their fetishes. nature has a sense of humor like that

[Anonymous No.14851849]

To what point is comfort justified?
The two biggest music festivals around here employ slave labour.
Most of the things I own profit amoral companies and are made by people living in hellish conditions.
Most of my country is already miserable and still they keep being drained.
Avarice guides the lives of millions, with disregard and excuses paving the way for it.
I see luxury cars, good food, sumptuous residences, and the beautiful people full of joy and expectation that own them, free of the dread that seems so ubiquitous, and can't help but desire to be among them.
It is a cursed desire, wishing for comfort born from the misery of others- one I don't wish to indulge in. Still, it lives inside of me.

[Anonymous No.14851894]

>>14851723
You'll fail at that, just like you've failed at everything else.

[Anonymous No.14851910]

>>14846966
what is criminology

[Anonymous No.14851916]

>>14851910
I don't know.

[Anonymous No.14851965]

Sun and steel was wanky nonsense.

[Anonymous No.14851976]

It has been probably thought before and written about so i wish to ask you if you could recommend me more authors and writings like what i'm about to describe.
Here goes nothing! We are going to assume the universe exists outside of our perceptions. Humans made up words, concepts, tools to try and learn more about the world, but this is an imperfect try as it is a derived method of finding out the truth, it's not something that exists independent of man's will.
Thus, we will never get to know the true ESSENCE of the universe.
This is my main belief. For example, the desk my laptop is sitting on might not be, in it's essence called a desk or serve as a desk, this is just how we understand it. The true meaning, the essence, the very core of everything surrounding us is hidden and cannot be fully grasped.
Are there any philosophers that talk about something like this? About this essence i made up?

[Anonymous No.14851979]

>>14846948

why? so u can write a book and make money from our writings?

[Anonymous No.14852010]

My goal is to have 100k USD by the end of the year, dunno if I’ll make it but I’m going to try!

[Anonymous No.14852390]

I carry a deep sadness due to the decisions I've made in my life, and the decisions that I continue to stick by.
When I think about them briefly, I want to cry.
When I try to cry, I think about them longer, and am unable to.

I think it would be a cathartic to shed tears, but an unknown stoicism inside me prevents it.

[Anonymous No.14852489]

I found the next book I want to write. 6 months of not writing anything, and I am back.

[Anonymous No.14852538]

To all my old(er)fags: Do you ever get nostalgic about stuff that happened in your late teens/early twenties? I feel las though, since this period of my life is characterized mostly by bleakness and monotony, I will look back at it unfavorably. My innocence is essentially lost, and I see no way to regain it.

[Anonymous No.14852547]

>>14852390
Let it all out anon. You'll feel much better afterwards.

[Anonymous No.14852595]

>>14852538
I mostly feel sad that I was so serious and repressed, but I had a very traumatic life and essentially had to work everything out and make lots of mistakes on my own. Not everyone's youth is magical, but maybe the loss of innocence and splashing into the cold water of adult life is gratifying in other ways. There are "seasons" to life, as Cicero put it, and as sad as it is... you can't go back, you can't change those bleak and monotonous times. But if you accept where you are in life and what comes with it, you can still find joy and maybe you can help other people the way you wish someone had been there to help you.

[Anonymous No.14852617]

>>14852010
Whatcha gonna do with it, Anon?

[Anonymous No.14852637]

I'm having a hard time settling on my beliefs. I see allure in radical beliefs, but I don't want them to dominate my life and make me bitter.

[Anonymous No.14852681]

I feel aimless because I don't have a job, but when I get a job I'll hate it.
>>14852538
You grow nostalgic for what you have. You will look back on this time and find something.
>>14852489
congrats anon
>>14852637
Why do you need to do this?
>>14851196
I came to feel that the passage of time does not matter if nothing happens. 5 years might as well be 5 weeks if it is just stasis. People told me that time heals all wounds, but it doesn't. You have to find someone else; difficult, but true.
>>14851730
Thank you.

[Anonymous No.14852695]

>>14852681
Because I think it'll help me live by them better. Though, maybe I should confess it's partially a desire to settle on them so I can consistently argue them.

[Anonymous No.14852757]

Books I need to read:
The Koran
Meditations on the Tarot
Three Books on Occult Philosophy
Das Kapital
Conquest of Bread
The Quark and the Jaguar

Books I will probably not read:

The Koran
Meditations on the Tarot
Three Books on Occult Philosophy
Das Kapital
Conquest of Bread
The Quark and the Jaguar

[Anonymous No.14852766]

>>14852757
Remember to mind your time economy. A book may be worth reading, but there's no shame in putting it on the backburner if you have more relevant books to read or more important things to do.

On the other hand, do challenge yourself.

[Anonymous No.14852925]

>>14852538
There are times when I wish things had gone differently, but then I am reminded it was precisely necessary how it all happened. Worrying about the past and what might've been, or the future and what could be, spoils the present. I don't believe in the idea of your "best years" being some fixed span of time in life like say your twenties. Your best years are your best years, whenever they come to you. This view takes away some of the anxiety when you're miserable and 21 and your life is going nowhere.

[Anonymous No.14852948]

Few things terrify me more than vanity, being blinded by your own ego. It's such an easy trap to fall into, and most never realize that they have. Scary.

[Anonymous No.14853654]

My gf who said she needed time to process something told me that we needed to break up because she realized that she is a lesbian while dating me. Fml.

[Anonymous No.14853700]

There's a plane floating listlessly outside my window. There are no clouds in the sky. It's a sunny day, with an incendiary heat that melts the bottom of my sandals into a rubber gumminess. The melted rubber permeates my feet into my girlfriend's nose. She giggles as I lift her shit Nd blow raspberries into her bellybutton.

[Anonymous No.14853718]

>>14853654
Well you could always get a sex-change and become the girl of her dreams.

[Anonymous No.14853722]

bernie eat tide pod

[Anonymous No.14854016]

>>14853654
Seems like a lie. Become more masculine and fuck her in the ass.

[Anonymous No.14854140]

>>14853654
>sucks & fucks hundreds of guys
>teehee im a lesbian

[Anonymous No.14854159]

>>14854140
She's only been with one guy other than me and that was abusive because her hyper religious family made her get married as soon as she turned 18.

[Anonymous No.14854187]

[Anonymous No.14854204]

My kindle has bad battery life now so I want to buy a new one but no ereader has USBC yet + the kindle still works fine otherwise so there's really no reason to upgrade

[Anonymous No.14854260]

>>14854159
at least she escaped her family and abusive relationship. maybe she is a legit lesbian or bisexual that's much more comfortable with women (maybe as a result of past abuse), don't blame yourself. are you still in touch with her? lesbians make pretty good friends.

[Anonymous No.14854272]

A system of beliefs is a part of the body. Materialist say: "What is important is the stomach". But why should I consider one part of the body more important than another part of the body. Health rests on the principle of giving each part of your body what it is due. I put food in my stomach and ideas in my mind, so that each part may be healthy.

Bad food makes me sick, and so do bad ideas. If an idea is logical, as far as its arguments go, but makes me sick, it is a bad idea, does not contribute to my health, and I will not keep it for long, but discard it quickly. If an idea is illogical, but benefits my health, it is an healthy idea, and I will keep it as long as it benefits my health. If you want to stay healthy, you cannot allow yourself to judge an idea by it being logical or illogical, keeping the logical and discarding the illogical. You have to judge an idea by its "nutritional value"; if the idea benefits your health, you should keep it, if the idea makes you sick, you should discard it.

What ideas to keep and what ideas to discard is determined by your bodily reaction to them. One should remember, however, that medicine may taste bitter and may give us stomach aches before it makes us healthier.

[Anonymous No.14854281]

>>14854260
>>14846948
Homosexuals aren't really a thing. They're just confused individuals who's parents failed to teach them how to be decent people. Any idiot will shove his p*nis into anything he grows fond of, and any woman will spread'em for anything that makes them feel better about being worthless. Sex is nothing more than an act to reproduce and pass on lineage, therefore fulfilling the whole point of having sexual organs. We're really no better than monkeys but just think we're God's because we were able to "figure out" we're worth more because we can say so.

[Anonymous No.14854337]

eeiee ieee brom brom fruu fruue tititititititititi ttooo froo froo frooof rooofrooo
t. listening to Autechre

[Anonymous No.14854390]

>>14854281
>We're really no better than monkeys but just think we're God's because we were able to "figure out" we're worth more because we can say so.
In other words, we are better than monkeys.

[Anonymous No.14854453]

>>14848377
I hope you will be okay, Alzheimanon.

[Anonymous No.14854481]

>>14854281
"we're really no better than monkeys" fuck off Joe Rogan. We're objectively smarter and more compassionate than any other living thing by far and most of us are civilised

[Anonymous No.14854488]

>>14849921
anime is the mind-killer.

[Anonymous No.14854679]

>>14852538
Yes but I also regret the way I was/decisions I made in my late teens and early twenties. For example, I didn’t really read much and I just kind of floated through life and didn’t care about too much. As dumb as it sounds finding this board would’ve been beneficial then.

[Anonymous No.14854792]

>>14854337
mega based

[Anonymous No.14855105]

just finished reading pic rel for the first time. as i was closing the final page i was crying so much, my mother asked me what's going on.
thanks, /lit/, truly great book

[Anonymous No.14855306]

I studied economics in college. I didn’t really think about it back then but I’ve come to be extremely regretful and utterly ashamed of this choice. It’s not even that I think it’s a pseudo-science like you see on /lit/ as much as it just disgusts me to think what kind of person studies such a thing? The horror of the economic view of life and has completely gripped me and won’t let go. But I want nothing to do with it in my life, a complete rejection. I’m obsessed with erasing this blemish from my biographical portrait, but I know I can’t. I’ll never be the writer or philosopher I want to be be I squandered this opportunity on something I now believe is simply not worth serious consideration at best and a reflection of ugly personhood at worst. What good can I contribute now? It’s over for me.

[Anonymous No.14855369]

>>14854281
There is literally nothing wrong with being gay, but homosexuals are often tied in with mental disease for a number of reasons. "The only purpose of sex is to reproduce" is a massive cope, and baby's first morality crisis.

Speaking in the most logical way, the superior sexual system is masculine men who are attracted to and sexually dominant feminine men and women.

[Anonymous No.14855407]

Lately my mind has been like a spiked trap, barbed with regrets, embarrassments, intrusive thoughts, unpleasant ruminations. Is this the legacy of my choices? Or is this a symptom? Minds should not grow spikes, so that when you reach into them you risk ripping to shreds whatever you used to probe it.

[Anonymous No.14855522]

>>14846948
The only God I need is the Ace of Spades.

[Anonymous No.14855828]

>>14852595
Thanks for the response, anywhere I can read about the “seasons” of life? It reminds me of pic related

[Anonymous No.14856952]

>>14855828
>irony and satire
>winter

fucking retarded

[Anonymous No.14857232]

>>14846948
I'm stuck in a major depressive episode that is the hardest one thus far to escape and my despair keeps making my memories difficult to access. It's to the point where I feel absolutely retarded and like my mental capacity will no longer be the same as it was before I fell into the pit I'm in currently. The only reason I'm even saying this here on /lit/ is because it's anonymous and no one will ever know I'm the one saying it.

[Anonymous No.14857241]

Any pandemic is doubly so, an affliction of disease and of fear. The way fear spreads coincides with the propagation of the pathogen. Such that society's reaction to the viral outbreak is just as bad or worse than the virus itself. Quarantines , market meltdowns, mob rushes to buy hand sanitizer and face masks. How quickly this invisible threat dissolves the bonds of trust, scattering society into frightened individuals desperate to survive at any cost.
During the black plague Italian scribe Giovanni Boccacio wrote about how the plague destroyed basic principles of humanity. "One citizen avoided another, hardly any neighbour troubled about others, relatives never or hardly ever visited each other. Moreover, such terror was struck into the hearts of men and women by this calamity, that brother abandoned brother, and the uncle his nephew, and the sister her brother, and very often the wife her husband. What is even worse and nearly incredible is that fathers and mothers refused to see and tend their children, as if they had not been theirs."

Fear is the real plague.

[Anonymous No.14857285]

> mfw getting more and more nonverbal
truth cant be shared because you can only share it with words. access the higher hivemind of countless personalities trapped within you to get what i meant here. language is a blessing but also a fundamental restriction. i think i might be developing schizophrennia for real this time

[Anonymous No.14857310]

Im happy but also wary. Moving away to begin my proper start into my academic career, but also concerned about possible outcomes that would set me back more than I already am.

[Anonymous No.14857345]

I really hate my job, but i can't be bothered to put in the effort to find an actual career.

[Anonymous No.14857352]

>>14857232
I know you said you're anonymous but do you need a friend? It really sucks to hear you're suffering so deeply.

[Anonymous No.14857409]

i'm so glad animals are real. imagine if friendly beasts that bond with us were another myth, humans stuck on a planet populated by fish and insects that arent that cute or nice to the touch, incapable of loving you.

every time an animal shows its affection to me im in such a bliss i barely believe it's real

[Anonymous No.14857459]

>>14857345
i really hate my job but looking for jobs is so miserable and time consuming. i always stay in shitty jobs longer than i should for that reason. this whole weekend i haven't even applied to anywhere. i'm hoping the shithole i interviewed with last week will hire me so i can be done with it. I'm in a crappy annoying temp job for the meantime.

[Anonymous No.14857467]

>>14857459
I've been stuck in the shithole i am currently for 5 years. I just can't be bothered looking for another job because i know it's just going to be the same shit.

[Anonymous No.14857488]

>>14857345
become a stablehand. it might be exhausting, but never draining or soulcrushing to work with animals. all worth it when their ears point at you and they hum-neigh upon seeing you. you won't regret a day of such job

[Anonymous No.14857515]

>>14857409
Based.

I could have fucked this girl yesterday, but since I thought having sex is such a powerful experience, and one of us might develop feelings afterwards or over think it, I just talked with her into late hours of the night.

She really seemed to want sex, she is a virgin, but told me she has this whore complex, a lot of problems I could make worse by fucking, so I just talked about metaphysical shit. We are both such awkward and lonely people.

[Anonymous No.14857548]

>>14857515
divinely based. a lot of newfags would foam at the mouth at this, but that is what peak human relationship is like.

[Anonymous No.14857610]

>>14846948
If any of you is religious please pray for me. I'm going through a hard time that will have momentous impact on my future.

[Anonymous No.14857711]

>>14857352
It would be nice

[Anonymous No.14857724]

>>14857711
Of course, if you have a way to make contact just let me know and we can talk there. :)

[Anonymous No.14857763]

I need to talk with my cousin who fucked off to Sweden. As far as I know he had the same restlessness that consumes me, and seems to have overcome it quite some time ago.
It won't be easy to go there and see him in person, but maybe a small adventure will be good for me.
I can always go to Finland after it and finally explore the land of spurdo

[Anonymous No.14857765]

>>14846948
Cookies

[Anonymous No.14857771]

>>14855369
"being gay" isn't real, retard
keep trying to mine your reductionist philosophies for a nugget of meaningful existential foundation though

[Anonymous No.14857807]

>>14846948
Sex is a normal bodily function.
In that sense it's a perfectly normal thing, you could even say it's a good thing because it's a social activity and humans are social animals.
Though, where I find my own problem with sex is instead of looking to partake in it with someone, i'm looking for validation through the person I'm interested in having sex with.
If I'm making choices in an attempt to be validated through another person then I am making a mistake.

[Anonymous No.14857825]

i am trying to coalesce. I think that means sleep. good night.

[Anonymous No.14857843]

>>14857724
If you have discord or telegram I'll be glad to talk there

[Anonymous No.14857852]

>>14857807
The real question is: how does one transcends the need of being validated through external means?

[Anonymous No.14857861]

>>14854481
Very. Good. Me brain big, me brain so big can think smart. Me think smart so me know all. Me know all so me can know why me be me and why you be you and why it all be as it do.

[Anonymous No.14857865]

>>14851730
"last night i bond-burgered your sister"?

[Anonymous No.14857869]

>>14857843
Yeah, absolutely. Oka#8354.

[Anonymous No.14857870]

How do i shut my mind off? I live way too much and my head and have to be thinking constantly, but it's not even good thinking, just worthless useless shit. It's a complete waste of mental energy going nowhere.

[Anonymous No.14857874]

>find something i really i want to read
>only available in french
It's Suréna by Pierre Corneille btw. what do, shove the whole thing in google translate? fuck. it's 2020 and there are scores of unemployed literature majors who are bilingual. can't some of you useless fucks translate shit? i'm tired, every time i turn around there's literature that isn't translated. i can't learn every language on earth. RRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Anonymous No.14857889]

>>14857232
I've felt the same in the past, and guarantee your mind can recover from it.
Don't forget physical factors might be aggravating it, like a lack of proper rest and exercise, unhealthy diet and, possibly, vitamin D deficiency.
Hope you get better, anon.

[Anonymous No.14857933]

>>14857852
Well, if I'm content in my own words and actions then I guess that would be a good start. Once I find myself planning sentences or actions for another person then I realize I'm going astray.
I don't know, i haven't thought about that side of it too much, i just happened to realized I was seeking acceptance from other people earlier today.

[Anonymous No.14858000]

>warm weather
>roasties immediately dress like whores

WHITE SHARIA NOW

[Anonymous No.14858035]

>>14858000
avert your gaze, brother. use this god-given day as an opportunity to strengthen your willpower. amen.

[Anonymous No.14858106]

>>14856952
Explain

[Anonymous No.14858134]

“Sapiosexual” women only exist insofar as the intelligence they leech from their latest victim can increase their social status. You will be hard-pressed to find a woman who values knowledge in and of itself, unless she is genuinely autistic.

[Anonymous No.14858210]

>>14847964
I'd recommend art

[Anonymous No.14858250]

Kinda hate what I'm doing but I don't know what enjoying what you do means.

[Anonymous No.14858262]

>>14851730
69 eggs dee

[Anonymous No.14858274]

>>14846948
I constantly am rebooting myself, in hopes of change.

[Anonymous No.14858490]

number of poems i wrote each year since i started writing poetry

2014: 3
2015: 2
2016: 10
2017: 100
2018: 86
2019: 42
2020 so far: 16

[Anonymous No.14858491]

>>14851976
You just described Kant.

[Anonymous No.14859068]

only my cat knows the real me

[Anonymous No.14859115]

>>14858490
Well done, anon

[Anonymous No.14859208]

All my writings about dragons have been for nothing

[Anonymous No.14859232]

My brother got dumped by his wife, the mother of his one year old child, the girl he loved for 10 years and still does.
She got depressed when she returned to work after her pregnancy and "fell in love" with the only guy working there.
How can 10 years of love disapear at the sight of the first slight difficulty? She's a weak person.

I'm sad for my brother and I hope this never happens to me .

[Anonymous No.14859459]

Fuck ME I'm never gonna get a cute gf

[Anonymous No.14859486]

>>14859459
"gf"

[Anonymous No.14859500]

>>14846948
https://discord.gg/P4zyRjB

[Anonymous No.14859504]

What is it that actually makes a “real” relationship with someone different than say, the zoomer’s relationship with a twitch streamer or an orbiter’s relationship with an ethot? I was thinking about this in the context of humanoid robots. In both cases above the contradiction is that the relationship is one-sided, but a sufficiently advanced robot could give the appearance of having a mutual connection. At that point what’s the difference, really? Why does the idea of loving your sex robot or whatever seem hollow and pathetic? Is it a spook?

[Anonymous No.14859541]

>>14859208
Why? Did you give up on finishing? Have you lost faith in being published?

[Anonymous No.14859545]

>>14857610
You're in my thoughts and prayers, anon. Your faith in God will be rewarded, perhaps not right away or when you wish but it will pay off in the end. Godspeed.

[Anonymous No.14859556]

>>14859486
Yes that is a girl do you have a problem?

[Anonymous No.14859597]

>>14859541
I've just been writing blog posts, twitter tweets, random PDF documents that I link to on random forums including here, google docs that I do the same with, and occasionally leather bound journals that I give out to people at random.

[Anonymous No.14859652]

>>14846948
My view is that the vast majority of opinions and arguments are informed by overly simplified and misrepresented data. These problems that humanity faces can only be solved by thinktanks with experts in many fields, they're too multifarious for any small group, or single person. People's proclivity for success is determined by genetics and the obstacles in their way are environmental, they're really the same as everything's a deterministic illusion of free will(kind of an arbitrary distinction when morality is brought up), but we like to think of environment as being the more important and as a dynamic factor for success.

I'm currently in a math/physics major and studying philosophy with every spare class. I'd like to work in an arctic research base someday, staring out upon a drifting white plain in a permanent day is an aesthetic I'd very much like to experience. I write for pleasure, and if I ever publish fiction it'll be once I'm dead(unsure if I'd even want that).

I used to be depressed, but I've adopted the view that life is intrinsically death anyways, as it would be lopsided and meaningless binary otherwise. I'm not afraid of death, but dying is a phobia of mine. If I obtain a terminal illness I'd not like to die in a sterile hospital room, I think I'd take the "final overdose" and worst-case scenario see heaven once.

The day to day is fine, I drink coffee and learn new ideas. Getting out of bed and being earnestly curious, can't ask for much more.

[Anonymous No.14859655]

>>14846948
https://discord.gg/P4zyRjB

[Anonymous No.14859706]

>>14846948
I need a hug
and a kiss
and some grab assing
hair pulling
tongue swathing
deep panting
limb locking
heavy breathing
night time medicine

[Anonymous No.14859734]

>>14859504
I would say the key difference between the cases you described is a symmetry of feeling between the participants. It's clear that in the case of a zoomer's alienated digital crush that there isn't parity. There is no common ground. What's in one isn't in the other. In the case of the robot appearance is not the same as reality. One could think of someone who marries for money. Their life with their spouse consists then of maintaining an appearance, to act against the truth. Fighting the truth is a never ending burden and the attempt to cover it up is bound to slip and reveal it. There is ultimately a hollowness to such an arrangement. It will not go where an authentic connection could go.
A real relationship in contrast is built around mutuality. Both lovers are rushing into each other, opening up to each other, there is revelation rather than concealment, truth rather than appearance. At least to the extent that the relationship is healthy.

[Anonymous No.14859749]

>>14846948
i come here looking for truth and leave disappointed every time.

[Anonymous No.14859756]

>>14859545
Thanks. Truly appreciate it.

[Anonymous No.14859773]

>>14859459
My problem is I will - I am on the path to becoming a normie - but it will be Too Late. [Houellebecq quote] and also that I will probably only get older women and that my penis does not work like it used to.

[Anonymous No.14859797]

Words are spells, spelled to excel, at best, when in doubt, throw them out!
I have no patience for the impatient, complaining as you wait, learn to listen and you may find that you were next in line. Now you must begin again, but how many times did you do this friend? Take heed to these signs, I love you and be careful what you put to your minds eye. The lines take your time and may throw you out if you have not the strength or know how to keep your way, say say say

[Anonymous No.14859840]

>live near Seattle
>starting to develop a cough
It's been real lads.

[Anonymous No.14859843]

>>14859840
Unless you're 60+ it's unlikely you'll die of pneumonia or anything. The danger with coronavirus is getting a respiratory infection during the flu-like symptoms.

[Anonymous No.14859848]

>>14859843
I'm more worried about a re-infection, that's when the organ damage kicks in. Also worried about my parents and grandparents.

[Anonymous No.14859854]

>>14859848
The grandparents are a concern, but I wouldn't worry about yourself too much. Get on antibacs if you start having the symptoms of an infection.

[Anonymous No.14859868]

>>14859848
iirc there's only one shady report on reinfestion. now go to the office of the party you hate or one of those faggy overpriced bookstores and cough on everything. you are the hound of apocalypse.

[Anonymous No.14859872]

>>14859848
Typhoid anon, use this power responsibly.

[Anonymous No.14859994]

>>14859115
thanks. most of them are very very bad.

[Anonymous No.14860016]

So many troubles arise from living in a big stupid country like America, Russia, or China. It's better to live in a small, smart country like the Netherlands, South Korea or Switzerland. To simplify greatly he troubles stem from scalability. Big stupid countries are generally spread thin, their organizational systems cost more to manage, top-heavy bureaucracies balloon. Generally as you multiply the need for roles in a state because the state must share some general ratio of proportionality with the landmass and population size of the country, you multiply the odds for corruption and incompetence. Any given individual matters less and half the time are replaceable by someone else. Critical infrastructures become overburdened and are harder to maintain over larger distances. Everything is either too crowded or too empty. Wastefulness and inefficiency are inevitable for the simple fact that there is too much shit to deal with.
Small smart countries instead operate like a compact, efficient microchip. There are less pieces to deal with, and so intelligence can be invested more proportionately and with greater concentration. There are usually fewer people, so everybody counts a bit more and there is likely to be a strong sense of identity tied to the homelike closeness of the national turf. Maintaining the fundamentals of the state such as infrastructure and administration is much easier as tighter control can be exerted over a narrower base of operations.

Most of the megafauna throughout paleological time have gone extinct. Dinosaurs, humorously large birds, bigger versions of elephants, bears, lions , hippos, orangutans . They're all gone. One would think that this pattern of all the bigger things dying off might encapsulate a universal principle: big is bad.

[Anonymous No.14860035]

I'm just tired. I don't know how much longer I can keep pushing the boulder up the hill.

[Anonymous No.14860087]

>>14859749
Doesn't every external search for truth end that way?

[Anonymous No.14860196]

>>14860035
> that gif
i feel like an absolute faggot for missing le old tumblr full of funny porn artists. used to talk to a lot of them over trivial matters, it was comfy

[Anonymous No.14860197]

>>14857889
different anon but this
went through the same shit.
gl

[Anonymous No.14860435]

Any recs on book that could help to reignite inner masculine force?
I've been thinking about Conan.

[Anonymous No.14860590]

I want to know if I'm a narcissist, but only if the answer is one that I'd like.
I hate the fear of the possibility, and the ass I truly must make myself of - beyond what I already know.
Maybe it truly is avoidant personality disorder, but I might just be choosing that because it's more comfortable.
Maybe I hate myself too much to be a narcissist. I do tend to take others way too seriously, even if I'm constantly wrong about them and their meanings.
I know I'm being lied to and gaslit all the time but what is the truth? Can I even know it to any relevant extent? What if I'm a dunning-kruger retard? I've been horribly wrong before and certain of my correctness, same as most other fools. Maybe I've grown a bit and I see their error now, but I still want to blame them despite having been the same... I'm a horrible person.

[Anonymous No.14860597]

>>14860435
Count of Monte Cristo

[Anonymous No.14860829]

Call me an edgelord but I'll say it anyway: your problems and mental illnesses are contagious. Seek help from your neighbour.

[Anonymous No.14860897]

they're now frens

[Anonymous No.14860937]

>>14860597
Isnt it only revenge story?

[Anonymous No.14861003]

>>14860087
You pick up the little snippets of whats true and use it to construct understanding of the truth.
Reminds me of the fictitious concept of metatext from D&D.
https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Metatext

[Anonymous No.14861141]

non-being is certainly preferable to being

[Anonymous No.14861723]

>>14861141
There is no non-being. All there is is being.

[Anonymous No.14861770]

>>14857285
Nobody tell him (he’s based!)

[Anonymous No.14861815]

>>14857610
This might seem silly at this point, but my head is going to burst and my legs are shaking. So far, I haven't shed a single tear, yet I feel as if I have been crying for a whole week. I have no one to share my grief with. This isn't some cute depressive episode, I'm in a genuinely dangerous situation, and even if I survive I would go on leading a poor, miserable existence, every minute of which a nightmare of longing and anxiety. Someone please show me where I can find some consolation, the sadness and regret are tearing me apart.

[Anonymous No.14861911]

>>14861723
Then what is death?

[Anonymous No.14862008]

>>14861770
as for now there's infinite pros and not a single con, maybe aside from inability to express in words what i mean exactly (but that's true for most, except with normans it's common experiences and not something probably felt only by me and similar schizos).


> constructing pieces of art in a media thats fundamentaly impossible
> perfect in every way, entirely up to my liking
> neverending supply of new concepts and ideas
> infinite post-books stored right in my head

[Anonymous No.14862014]

>>14861815
have you tried drugs
unironically, if it's THAT bad for you a quick temporary fix might be very relieving. try something light first though, and never touch opiates and meth.

[Anonymous No.14862029]

>>14861815
i prayed for you last night, anon, and i'm praying for you again right now. if you need an outlet to share your grief, i can create a throwaway email or something like this. i'm a student now but i've worked in counseling and case management before—i'm not at all prescriptive but i do, at least, know how to listen. this is *not* to cajole you into doing this but just know that is an option. as far as comfort goes in horrible, awful situations i always turn to long walks in nature and just close my eyes and listen to my surroundings. that can be liberating and consoling at once—the last time i was going through something horrible i spent nearly all my time outside.

[Anonymous No.14862113]

> ruble entirely dependent on oil
> mfw its value is decreasing again
i dont want to live in poverty... bros if prices rise again i think i'll have to resort to stealing food from stores

[Anonymous No.14862143]

>>14862014
This is bad advice. I'd recc psychedelics, but not much beyond that.

[Anonymous No.14862155]

>>14846948
tfw your ex finds a hotter date

[Anonymous No.14862190]

any of you faggots wanna fight?

[Anonymous No.14862200]

>>14857852
just do what makes you happy and dgaf

If it involves other people and they aren't interested, find others that are or try again later. Don't get too hung up on rejection, they aren't rejecting 'you', they're just rejecting doing something with you at that given time.

[Anonymous No.14862448]

>>14846948
I've been having stomach problems for a while now.
This weird gas piles up in my gut and it hurts.
The more often it happens, the more I'm afraid I'll die.
I'm so poor that I can barely afford a doctor ad health insurance and even then I'm like 80% they wouldn't really care to help me.
But I think everything will be fine if I live healthier.

[Anonymous No.14862544]

I want to write philosophy but I worry that I’m not a very good writer and I’m too late to the game, having not picked up seriously until I was already in my twenties.

[Anonymous No.14862867]

>>14862544
Are you in school, or do you have history with a university? In theory, you could still publish at 60. These things are more genetic than environmental, so it doesn't really matter if you started a little late, it didn't hinder your brain in any real way.

[Anonymous No.14862884]

Can i save her?

[Anonymous No.14862918]

>>14857409
blessed post

[Anonymous No.14863111]

How do you get over that feeling that everything you create feels incredible cringe?

[Anonymous No.14863151]

>>14863111
By practicing and cutting out the stuff that doesn't work.

[Anonymous No.14863156]

4 out of 10 rejections and I'm already starting to panic. Guess that's what I get for building my identity on being a writer. And while imaginations crashing against reality isn't too enjoyable, I'm more concerned about disappointing the few friends who actually believed. Maybe it's time to mentally prepare to whore myself out for the self-pub market and sucking up to "influencers". Then again, I want to collect at least 100 rejections before giving up for good.

[Anonymous No.14863158]

>>14857409
they are just recognizing their inferiority and trying to curry favor with a master that might otherwise kill them

[Anonymous No.14863162]

>>14846968
I'm going to have a listen, anon.
Thanks

[Anonymous No.14863164]

>>14863156
10 is fucking nothing, chin up

[Anonymous No.14863185]

>>14861911
Movement.

[Anonymous No.14863189]

>>14863185
From being to what?

[Anonymous No.14863216]

>>14863189
To being. Non-being is only a process of imagination that tricks you into an illusion. You could imagine something that doesn't exist, so your mind would be tricked into classifying all existence to being and non-being. But in reality, out of the bounds your mind, this non-being means nothing. In the world there is only things that exists. Nowhere aside your mind could you find things that don't exist. Non-existence means nothing, there is only existence.

[Anonymous No.14863232]

>>14863216
Is there only wakefulness? What were you before birth?

[Anonymous No.14863252]

>How the smell of the hot iron pot mixes with the steam and intoxicates you even before you pour the tea

Properly prepared East Asian tea (not the Br*tish kind) is an unrivaled aesthetic experience

[Anonymous No.14863266]

>>14846992
I am kinda the opposite, guy. I feel like sex is nothing more than sticking my dick in a girl, I feel the same when I think of sticking my dick in a fleshlight, and I see ass and tits nothing more than some round things, I think it's from the PTSD, or maybe just from depersonalization.

[Anonymous No.14863274]

>>14863252
English breakfast tea with toast is a based aesthetic as well.

[Anonymous No.14863324]

>>14863232
What was I, as a being inside space and time? A being carried by my mother and my father separately. What was I outside space and time? Everything and nothing at the same time.

[Anonymous No.14863391]

>>14862867
I have graduated from undergraduate and I work at a school. I studied something I kind of hated in college and choked off the creative and intellectual side. I didn’t really recover it until I was 24. I’m 26 now. I’ll be 27 soon. I’m actually quite ashamed at the choices I made from 17-24 and I often feel like I don’t have whatever that genetic thing is or it would’ve manifested itself back then.

[Anonymous No.14863395]

Which writers/philosophers would be trannies had they lived in the 21stC?

[Anonymous No.14863401]

>>14863395
Hegel and Deleuze

[Anonymous No.14863504]

>>14846948
In many areas of my life, I have exceeded my peers. I was the one to go to an exotic country to work as an intern, then to reside in another, affluent country upon graduating; thus I have started out with a comparatively generous salary. I have achieved great command of English and am assimilating other languages. I currently spend my free time viciously studying Chinese.

I have been brought up by a loving and lovable family whose single imperfection could be said to have been pampering me. I would receive accolades at every other taken step, and while some may have been deserved, especially with regard to my reference peer group, I am by far not an unparalleled success, by any measure, rather a decently growing person and naturally also enjoy many faults of character.

The above would eventually make surface two characteristics in my demeanor. One, because many of my daily practices or outcomes thereof were locally uncommon (e.g., travelling young for white-collar work, earning more, self-studying Chinese) and mostly indicative of outperforming, it has been difficult for me to relate my life to other people without appearing as boasting. When meeting a new peer, in the overwhelming majority of cases I literally cannot recount how I passed the time in the recent months because I will be listing the study of a challenging and prospectful language, the area in which I live and the convenient holidays I have taken. I was once blissfully unaware of how it must have sounded, but was at one point rebuked by my other half, even, for selecting and smithing a prideful image to impress. But the image I related was not doctored at all, only an honest admission.

It all feels like a penalty for having tried to better myself.

Two, I have developed an unsatisfaction and a deafened ear for compliments. I do not know how to take them well. Just today, during a small social gathering it was anonymously outed that one of us was learning Chinese in their leisure. Now, with all the oohs and aahs and the question "who is it then?" ricocheting inside the rabble, how can I step up and admit it without being seen as having been angling for a compliment? And what of the compliments that invariably come after? Learning a language is impressive in that it is virtuous and disciplining, but it is nothing momentous. Please, people, just mind something else.

I would like to inspire and be good, but every time a compliment is slung my way, I feel vain. Fame I would like, but to raise spirits around me and not to instead cast a shadow on others. How does a deliberately modest person accept a compliment?

[Anonymous No.14863511]

>>14863391
I was a drug addict from 19-23 and I'm only just now starting a math/physics degree, so I would'nt feel too badly about wasted opportunity. Just practice, it's the only way you'll ever know. Read and write.

[Anonymous No.14863517]

>>14848238
What are you doing this weekend?

[Anonymous No.14863530]

Vice builds upon vice.

[Anonymous No.14863583]

>>14849805
> I think that compassion is horrifyingly vain if it does not lead to concrete acts of kindness.

I feel the same. I am often troubled by displays of passive activism, e.g., disseminating messages of prayer, mindfulness and charity. While I am aware that sharing the link to a charity drive may get more people to chip in a dollar, I can't help but think that ideal charity should be conducted anonymously. If you share a link to the charity drive, it is arguably virtue signalling.

I have once donated a nice sum to a charity drive upon the request of a friend, but I would not disclose to him if I gave any. They took it to mean that I didn't and judged me for it supremely harshly, raise-voice-then-slam-hang-up-button harshly.

As much as I am unhappy for having attended the Christian church mass, many virtues listed in the Bible are superb and "when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing" is prime.

[Anonymous No.14863591]

How to know what you want?
Introspection leads to nothing as i cant learn from non-existent. Is the only way just do random things and hope that you eventually stumble upon something?

[Anonymous No.14863607]

>>14852010
How would you like to earn it?

[Anonymous No.14863615]

>>14852390
Please write here.

[Anonymous No.14863626]

>>14854272
Have you considered extending the healthiness of ideas to a system larger than yourself? What of your own environment?

Would you accept an idea that is unhealthy for you, but healthy for your environment?

How far can you stretch it?

[Anonymous No.14863633]

>>14846948
Have I not burdened with unrelenting monstrosity, thirsting for power.
The wind calls to me
It begs for mercy

[Anonymous No.14863646]

>>14857515
There were only two of you there and yet I was moved as well.

[Anonymous No.14863655]

>>14857763
What difficulty is there in your going to Sweden?

[Anonymous No.14863656]

>>14846948
It's over

[Anonymous No.14863664]

>>14860590
Woah I also hate myself and tend to take others too seriously. Are those signs of narcissism?

[Anonymous No.14863679]

>>14859994
Different anon. Do you mind if we were the ones to judge? If you share them, we will find meaning in them that differs from the one you put down.

[Anonymous No.14863796]

>>14863111
stop judging yourself so hardly. accept your mediocrity and focus on improving.

[Anonymous No.14863813]

>>14863511
I also had problems with drugs in the past so I respect that a lot, but I guess I just feel like I’ve boxed myself into an intellectual area that I don’t want to be in. I pursued studies that not only are not actually interesting to me but I think are actually harmful. I hate it. And unlike the drugs I took, it’s part of my Intellectual biography forever. I’m probably rambling sorry. Good luck to you with school.

[Anonymous No.14863831]

>>14863591
Yes, gather as much experience as you can across as many fields as you can. As you said without having tried it it's impossible for you to know what it's really like and how you'll respond.

[Anonymous No.14863840]

>>14863796
>>14863151
My fear of failure and the subsequent denial and avoidance of action that could lead to failure has been hampering certain parts of my life for quite some years.
I've been doing some baby steps towards some betterment but its such a long way.

[Anonymous No.14863848]

>>14863813
Thanks anon, what school did you do?

[Anonymous No.14863861]

Time is running out and I can't wait for it to do so.

[Anonymous No.14863899]

>>14863840
failure is unacceptable to you because you are already perfect in your mind and anything short of of perfection is seen as a failure and a humiliation when it is in fact wholly normal and constructive.

accept yourself as you are and not as you should be, project that onto your actions and things will get easier.

[Anonymous No.14863911]

>>14861815
Are you bipolar?

[Anonymous No.14863920]

>>14863831
But the thing is that i've tried quite a number of things. Now i wouldnt mind if failure would lead to some sort of insight but the last 5 year failed project ( bachelor degree ) led to nowhere.

[Anonymous No.14863934]

>>14861815
Look you are in a dangerous situation. Okay.

Here's some advice. Go to the gym, and build your muscles. That way you can kick the ass of the guy who is harassing you, making you feel this way. You'll feel better after you kick their ass.

Or if someone is threatening your life, you can do a drive by on their house. 9mm glock will work, but I prefer the Ruger. Sometimes just shooting their parked car will work, and send a message to stop fucking with you. Make it look like there were more than one of you, really just look bigger and meaner than you really are with this act of courage.

Otherwise If your dangerous situation is health related, then all I can tell you is make your peace with God. Ask Jesus for Forgiveness, and walk the righteous path.

Just don't be a pussy and let people walk all over you.

[Anonymous No.14863936]

/lit is 99% people who like the idea of being a book person so all they read and discuss are things they lack the context to appreciate because they're just copying college reading lists and whatever genre fiction Barnes and Noble put next to the manga section.

[Anonymous No.14863951]

>>14863920
Try more, I wish there were a better way lad but there isn't. Try things before you make a big commitment like degrees.

[Anonymous No.14863952]

>>14863615
The decisions I've made aren't worth grieving over for anyone but me. It's not like I let other people down. The only person I've let down is myself.

I can't imagine it's interesting for anyone to read about my self pity. Unless they want it to feel better about themselves, in which case I'd rather not share anyway.

[Anonymous No.14863960]

>>14863936
How would someone go about not doing this?

[Anonymous No.14863973]

>>14863960
Well what do you want to read?

I've got some book titles that most likely, no one in this thread has read. You need first hand accounts from people who walked the walk.

Almost none of /lits suggestions, Barns & Nobles, or college reading lists include first hand accounts because they far too real, and tell the truth, even when they are lying.

[Anonymous No.14863991]

>>14863973
What "first hand accounts" do you mean?

[Anonymous No.14864007]

>>14863991
Life story's. B.C. era to 1500's, 1600's, 1700's, 1800's life in general. Meeting women, getting shot at, shooting back, making money, contemplating if God is real or not, having a revelation and weird things happening that make you believe in God again.

Yeah, that kind of stuff.

[Anonymous No.14864024]

>>14864007
Why read these first hand accounts? Oh gee golly, well of course because over the span of 1 thousand years there are accounts where the man writing is dealing with a situation almost just like yours... then you learn to deal with that situation, because someone went through a similar ordeal 300 years ago.

[Anonymous No.14864041]

>>14864007
>doesn't know how to pluralize
>christfag
>interested in niggertier biographies with no literary value
>subvocalizes

Please kys and leave this board forever

[Anonymous No.14864042]

>>14849015
Not to down the Rabbi, but that's pretty generic (tho no doubt profound) advice.

[Anonymous No.14864044]

>>14864024
But what if I just want to read fiction and philosophy?

[Anonymous No.14864047]

>>14864041
First hand accounts are the only thing with literary value.

Nothing else matters.

[Anonymous No.14864056]

>>14864044
Then you'll get nowhere, because Philosophy is absolutely nothing more than opinion. Most Philosophy is trash just like fiction.

However there is a forgiveness point if it's tied to an author with the life experience worth respecting.

[Anonymous No.14864058]

>>14864047
I guess Shakespeare's a hack

[Anonymous No.14864061]

>>14864056
Biographies are literally just opinion, they're purely subjective.

[Anonymous No.14864065]

>>14864058
Yes, Shakespeare is trash. There is better literature that's older that trumps Shakespeare's easily forgettable works.

Xenophon's Anabasis for example trumps Shakespeare entirely simply for being real.

[Anonymous No.14864068]

>>14864061
Nope, you are an idiot if you think that.

Biographies are just a re-telling of whatever happened. It's not an opinion, but a factual event.

[Anonymous No.14864080]

>>14864065
Man, you have a moronic view on literature. I guess the majority of the western canon including all of mythology have no literary value.

[Anonymous No.14864081]

>>14863960
Have a real, or at least concrete, goal to achieve and reasons for wanting them. Why copy a college reading list if you're not trying to get a scholarly understanding of literature? Lots of 'classics'are mind numbing to most people as are the discussions around them, so if you just want to be interesting then explore more modern writers and maybe steal a few names off the lists for prestigious awards.

If you just want to be able to talk to normies about books you could probably get even more mileage out of just reading from yearly top reading lists and forming some interesting opinions so as to maximize your ability to engage with regular readers

If you really are determined to be an arm chair scholar for your own gratification, act like a real scholar. Pull video lessons from physical, not on-line, colleges and watch them as you read the text and then pirate some scholarly essays on the topic to see what actual students and people trying to level up their degree have to say on the topic. The study of literature is more than just reading the text, there's numerous academic dialogues at the same time that quibble over details and experiment with arguing for new perspectives on old classics.

But either way: Reason->Goal->Work->Repeat. Any edgy teenager can pull memes from Plato's Republic.

[Anonymous No.14864086]

>>14864068
>Biographies are just a re-telling of whatever happened. It's not an opinion, but a factual event.
People misremember and lie anon, are you really this naive?

[Anonymous No.14864092]

>>14864080
Wrong. Xenophon wrote the fiction book Cryopaedia. He had the credentials of actual being in battles involving King Cyrus's relatives.

First hand experience. This gets you closer to truth instead of wasting your time on fiction writers who merely WISH they were there.

[Anonymous No.14864098]

>>14864086
That's why you've got to have the brains to cut through the sheep shit, and get to the gold. Most of you lack this ability to determine truth.

[Anonymous No.14864109]

>>14863848
I went to one of those more “prestigious” but large state unis in the US and I majored in economics.

[Anonymous No.14864118]

>>14846948
I entered one of my writing for a contest at my local university. I hope I at least get an honorable mention.

[Anonymous No.14864122]

>>14864109
Ah, my friend took economics for security and says he regrets it as well. My other friend went into business and barely finished his degree he hated it so much. At least economics is one of the more useful social sciences.

[Anonymous No.14864137]

>>14863960
I think it’s as simple as reading things that you actually have a deep and serious intellectual interest for and not because you want to project an image or pass time with pleasure although there’s a place for it.

[Anonymous No.14864150]

>>14863952
I feel this too. I think if I told most people what I felt regret over they’d think “who cares?” but to me it’s terribly important and deeply personal. I too and most ashamed at how I let myself down. I don’t have a remedy for you. I just wanted to let you know that I think I get it, at least to the degree that it’s possible for anyone else but you to get it.

[Anonymous No.14864159]

>>14851551
have you touched her cunny?

[Anonymous No.14864172]

>>14864122
It’s useful only in the sense that it looks employable for corporations. Otherwise, it’s of no use at all and I think it’s actually quite detestable.

[Anonymous No.14864187]

>>14851551
That’s pretty good writing. It reminded me of my last gf. We broke up over a year ago now.

[Anonymous No.14864190]

>>14849919
Where do you store the urine?

[Anonymous No.14864193]

>>14864172
What would you have taken instead?

[Anonymous No.14864204]

>>14851551
>We’ve only been _together_ the once
yikes

[Anonymous No.14864206]

>>14864150
Meditate on temporality. I follow a series of thoughts to lead myself out of slumps.

What is regret? The desire to change something in the past.
Can the past be changed? Even if it could, will you really be satisfied with the change?
The desire to change things can be boiled down to simply wanting something.
There is nothing unhealthy about wanting things. Goals are good to strive towards.
Retain your desire, but shift the time frame.
You didn't do something back then - do it now or later.
You did something you wish you didn't - learn from the mistake, never do it again.

[Anonymous No.14864634]

What do you guys think about my poem?

Everything I touch turns into gold,
shining, bright, cold.
And everyone comes by, says in a choir,
"Can you give me what I desire?"

And wherever I go,
people call me "gold maker",
look at me, surrounded by shining light.
Follow me, want part of what I can do,
but not me, never me myself,
only my gold.

And so I stand, surrounded by a pile of gold,
You smile at me.
I give you some.
What else is there that you would want?
My words themselves turn into gold;
you take them too, thank me, and go.
And I myself am still alone.

I hope that someday someone comes,
who shines so bright,
that my light compared is dusk,
won't be blinded, sees my plight, and takes the goose instead of might.
But I myself would never do,
Just now, I have been someone, too.
Instead of taking, I gave them gold; maybe it's me who is too cold?

Sitting on a tree, singing a song of worthless gold,
the words I say turn into gold,
And everyone comes, gathers round, to pick up just what I have found.
And cheer and clap for what they got,
So happy all,
perhaps it's fair in a sense,
someone has to make the gold,
I like to give; I like to sing; I like to make.
I like alone.

[Anonymous No.14864833]

more pics like this please

[Anonymous No.14864989]

I’d really like to be cute. Preferably a cute girl if that was magically possible, but since it’s not a cute boy would be fine. But it’s hard when you have acne scars and dark facial hair that’s still visible even after a close shave. I’ve been contemplating trying makeup but then I’d have to explain it to my parents who I live with.

I’m not even trans

[Anonymous No.14865033]

Listen, I will hive your fucking suits back I fucking promise. Whatever you want. I just want you to leave me alone. I want nothing to do with you, your cat lady wife, your fatass geek brother, your dweeby ugly niece, your tranny brother in law or any of the rest of your carnival family.

I WILL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO GET YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE!!

[Anonymous No.14865049]

If you want them back, I will give them back! I will even get them pressed and dry cleaned!

[Anonymous No.14865233]

Writing proofs is fine

[Anonymous No.14865358]

>>14864989
Laser?

[Anonymous No.14865363]

>>14846948
I'll never git gud. I'm too much of a defeatist. I'll neve be as good as I dream myself to be.

[Anonymous No.14865382]

>>14865033
*unzips dick*

suck on this

[Anonymous No.14865397]

>>14846948
FUCK THIS PAPER I HATE YOU YOUYYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOUYOU

LOCKE IS A FUCKING DUMBASS YOU REALLY GONNA GROUND PRIVATE PROPERTY IN LABOR

DO THE OCEAN WAVES OWN THE SAND BECAUSE THEY LABORED ON THE ROCKS?

DO THE WORMS OWN THE DIRT BECAUSE THEY LABORED ON THE LEAVES?

LOCKE YOU PIECE OF SHIT

[Anonymous No.14865398]

some word counts taken from my diary desu

2,443 uses of “fuck”
1,239 uses of “shit”
443 uses of “sex”
1,037 uses of “love”
370 uses of “kill”
677 uses of “sleep”
2,271 uses of “read”
963 uses of “write”
788 uses of “mom”
587 uses of “dad”
5 uses of “nigger”
13 uses of “nigga”
2,586 uses of “time”
465 uses of “god”

[Anonymous No.14865408]

I almost shot myself yesterday. I put the gun to my head and pulled the trigger until I heard the hammer click into half-cock. All I was really thinking about is how much heavier the trigger pull felt than it usually does. Then I heard the click. My mind sort of blanked after that. I hit the decocker, holstered, and put it back in its place. All on autopilot. Then I just got up and went to work like nothing happened.

[Anonymous No.14865451]

What be the subtle semantic distinction between "yikes" and "cringe"? Peradventure they express the same sentiment? Yet there is a microscopical difference, nearly imperceptible...

[Anonymous No.14865462]

>>14865451


yikes is more judgmental and detached, whereas cringe is more empathetic, as you inadvertently feel bad for the person involved

btw you have autism

[Anonymous No.14865476]

Three centuries between us and yet Wilhelm shares the same thoughts, the same deeds, and the same life, as mine. Is human life anything but variations on the same theme?

[Anonymous No.14865481]

I just had an intense dream yesterday, in which I fucked my cousin and we both loved it. I guess Freud was right about the desires of the unconscious.

[Anonymous No.14865507]

miss my dead friend desu

[Anonymous No.14865519]

>>14865462
yikes is dismissive/superior
cringe is diagnostic/sadistic

[Anonymous No.14865523]

>>14865507
based dead friend

[Anonymous No.14865531]

>>14865519
that’s actually a better interpretation

[Anonymous No.14865548]

Today is my birthday. I am 24 years old. It’s hard to celebrate when every year takes me further away from her.

[Anonymous No.14865550]

>>14865481
Last night I had a dream of how future monitors will look. The browser window had a 3D mode which you could interact with using your fingers. To close the window I squished with my fingers the red bulbous box in the top-right of the 3D window. The night before that I dreamt a lion tamer came to my farm house and let his lion loose forcing me to climb onto the roof. I kept yelling for him to leave, but he ignored me. Not sure what these are supposed to mean.

[Anonymous No.14865553]

>>14865550
You should read his book on dreams. Maybe there's something there about monitors and lions harassing people in the countryside.

[Anonymous No.14865652]

Read. Meditate. Make something of yourself. There is still time

[Anonymous No.14865688]

Fuck shit stupid fucking bitch fuck fuck god fucking damn it

[Anonymous No.14865730]

>>14865652
>There is still time
No, there isnt. 27 is past the prime and if you didnt do anything by this point, you wont get big.

[Anonymous No.14865744]

>>14864634
I like it

[Anonymous No.14865749]

>>14865408
Damn. I hope you figure out whatever compelled you to do that.

[Anonymous No.14865751]

>>14865730
I’ll be 27 soon and I feel like this often

[Anonymous No.14866015]

What is the consensus view of academic philosophy? I’m considering making the switch for graduate school coming from an unrelated field but I have a somewhat negative view philosophy departments overall. Further, it’s an aspiration of my mine but I fail to name one notable philosopher who came from my background and made a switch as late as I’ll be making it.

[Anonymous No.14866074]

Fuck. No one told me about detailed writing on janny application. I just wrote one or two sentences.

[Anonymous No.14866108]

>>14865519
based fellow autistic linguist

[Anonymous No.14866125]

My girlfriend has cancer and lives in another country.
I've only been dating her for 4 months and her health is deteriorating.
Is it worth staying in a long distance relationship, where I occasionally visit to see her in pain and slowly dying?

[Anonymous No.14866127]

>>14865730
better late than never. bros, it's never too late to start, stop being a pussy and wasting even more time wallowing in self-pity.

[Anonymous No.14866130]

>>14866125
she'll die soon, so better let her die in love. this or she makes a miraculous recovery and stays with you forever

[Anonymous No.14866148]

>>14866133

>>14866133

>>14866133

[Anonymous No.14866877]

>>14848729
Straight forward. That's a good advice for everyone. Nice, anon.