/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.14697038]

Seeing attractive people or hearing about men and women getting laid fills me with anger and jealousy.

I was born with a slight physical fuck-up which caused me to stick out as a child and teenager. It's fine now, I'm probably averagely attractive, and don't stick out as much anymore. I have a gf and friends.

Still I detest attractive men. I'm so jealous of how easier everything is for them. Intellectually I know it doesn't make a huge difference, though ut is very much real. Seeing ladyfriends talking to attractive guys frustrates me.

I think it has a lot to do with built up resentment and feelings of inadequatesy from my teens. What can I do to fix my broken head and not hate people who are attractive and/or having sex? It is hurting my life.

[Anonymous No.14697066]

I'm a very attractive man and I've always been alone my entire life. Every time I meet new people they always are resentful and jealous of me just because I look better than them.

[Anonymous No.14697074]

>>14697038
moot's boipucci can cure your heart

[Anonymous No.14697122]

>>14697038
just relax bro, we will all die

[Anonymous No.14697129]

>>14697038

I'm an 8/10 looks dude who has some kind of schizotypy or autism or something.

People always offhandedly comment about how I should just "go get a gf" or how I'd look like a swimsuit model if I got fit

[Anonymous No.14697164]

>>14697129
okay?

[Anonymous No.14697167]

>>14697066
Attractive people are generally more liked though. This is well documented. If people don't like you there are other reasons.
>>14697129
Okay?

[Anonymous No.14697190]

I don't want to proselytize so I'll just describe my own experience and hope that it can offer some insight. I've had a similar situation with regards to my height (I'm 5'2" or 1.57m). I have always been the runt in any group and as height is very much a deciding factor in romantic relationships I've never had much luck with it (despite that I was still able to get married, so in the end it really didn't matter all that much). However I've had the same envy of people taller (and therefore more attractive) than me. I was also intensely jealous of people that I perceived as better than me at work or study.

At some point I started to recognize that these emotions were having negative affects on my life. Many things suffered. My mood, my relationships with others, my work performance, even my sleep. After some introspection I realized that it wasn't the emotion itself that was harmful, envy and jealousy are just feelings after all, ephemeral and innocuous. It was not that different from the feelings that might arise from watching a horror movie or reading a thriller novel. The difference was that I knew the horror movie was not real, and so the emotions I felt had no lingering influence. They didn't cause anything downstream.

This realization still didn't help though. Because although I understood that it was the reaction to the emotions which was causing harm, I seemed to have no control over it. It seemed a completely automatic process--I observe someone taller, smarter, more attractive, more successful than me; I feel jealousy or envy; I have a stressful response.

After some more introspection and research (especially on the subject of neuroplasticity, which relates to making changes in the brain) I realized three things:

1. You cannot change the first two parts of the chain through force of will. People more attractive and successful exist and my reaction to them was too tightly conditioned to just be willed away.
2. You can change the response, and you do so by just shifting your focus to something else for a while when the emotion arises. I count my breath or recite memorized poetry in my head (Ulysses by Tennyson is my go to).
3. If you keep changing your response (and because the emotion itself isn't harmful) it becomes like watching a horror movie or reading a book, your brain no longer asserts the emotion as "real" and the feeling has no more causative power.

Anyway, I applied the above and pretty much got to #3 within a couple of weeks. It requires constant awareness of your mental state, because often the sequence from observation to response can happen within a few seconds and in order for the response to change permanently you need to refocus every single time the emotion arises. Even when it happens several times in succession. Even when it interrupts the process of refocusing (in which case you just refocus again). It's pretty simple (though not necessarily easy), but it worked for me.

[Anonymous No.14697200]

men love to take of women
women love to be taken care of
men make women happy, but
women do not make men happy

>men say it is bad for women to not be virgin
=>men compete for non-virgins
>men say it is bad for women to be divorced
=>men compete for divorced women
>men say it is bad for women to be single moms
=>men compete for single moms
>men say it is bad for women to have lots of casual sex
=>men compete for sluts
>men say it is bad for women to have abortions
=>men compete for women who had abortions


men crave women more than being happy

[Anonymous No.14697242]

>>14697038
Hey anon, I'm an 8/10 that grew up as a 4/10 - it's really not that great. Generally, the most universal, is people treat me like my life's way easier despite it, in no meaningful way, being that easy. The truly beautiful people, women who were models, do have some unnatural advantages (I've had friends get offered scholarships etc). For men, it's really fucking meh. If I don't use online dating, I'd be basically an incel, though girls will hit on me at bars on the rare occasion. The sad part is, however, if you do get with a girl, they assume that you're just a player or w.e. and so they don't actually open up emotionally and it leads to a very stymied sense of seduction.

Generally, the most fucked is my friends at work are disproportionately gay guys and women or people that could be attracted to me, not sure if that's because of the face, or because of the people I work with, but it adds a layer of Kafka-esqueness that sucks. Also, benign complaining is generally shrugged off by others as not a big deal, whereas most people will normally all agree.

In short, it's more common to be treated as "You're beautiful so x, y, and z," rather than the effects that people think it has.

[Anonymous No.14697247]

>>14697038
>What can I do to fix my broken head and not hate people who are attractive and/or having sex?

Stop feeling jealous and resentful? Think of other things. It's not that hard.

[Anonymous No.14697263]

Sex is just a spook

[Anonymous No.14697290]

>>14697038
This ain't about books, faggot.

[Anonymous No.14697294]

>>14697038
Apparently you kept the mental defect.
Not literature sage

[Anonymous No.14697299]

>>14697247
>Don't want to feel X? Just stop feeling X!

Brainlet

[Anonymous No.14697303]

>>14697038
I am decently attractive but physically unable to have sex so I spend my time talking to women and leading them on to ghost them without explanation
It's a painful life that I just don't think I'll be able to accept ever, I think it'd be better if I wasn't attractive

[Anonymous No.14697306]

>>14697167
I'm nearly adored by some individuals but for the most part, I encounter resentment from average looking men. Casual conversations are quickly dismissed no matter how similar the interest the moment anyone thinks of life as a competition. You can tell what is going through their minds, "this guy has it easy, fuck him", even though that is not true. It's almost like the midwit situation really. Persons between 3/10 to 8/10 in the looks department usually reject any sincere social interaction initiated on my part. Cockblocking and other exclusionary behavior is also prevalent by midface.

[Anonymous No.14697308]

>>14697190
You are a good man, thank you for bothering to make a good post.

[Anonymous No.14697319]

>>14697303
whats the matter, did your break your dick trying to suck it?
fag

[Anonymous No.14697324]

>>14697319
I was born without one

[Anonymous No.14697325]

>>14697038
Sick of this off-topic whiny beta shit tbqh senpai

[Anonymous No.14697331]

>>14697066
This desu. Also while their attention is entertaining at first, fags trying to get a piece of your ass gets very tiresome. Attention from women is overrated too, I've so much as received love letters from strangers but it does nothing to quell the loneliness because looks aint everything, ultimately finding someone you really resonate with remains just as hard.

[Anonymous No.14697333]

>>14697325
I don't want to talk about this with anyone else

>>14697319
cringe

>>14697324
I'm sending positive spiritual beams your way.

[Anonymous No.14697357]

>>14697331
>ultimately finding someone you really resonate with remains just as hard
lol, this sounds unlikely
less people would give you a chance if you were an uggo.

[Anonymous No.14697398]

>>14697324
Can you still coom, or rather orgasm, that is?

It seems like it would be convenient to be cockless 2bh, not having to deal with all girls' bullshit

[Anonymous No.14697517]

>>14697398
I said it figuratively, I do have a penis and I can coom yes
It's just very very small, shrimp size small, I can't even hold it in my hand
Also I have some weird condition where my dick head is very sensitive to the point where I can't even touch it, imagine poking your eye, that's how it feels to touch it but 10 times worse
Also I barely get erections, probably because I've always shied away from thinking sexually because absolute repression and repulsion of being exposed idk
I'm going to a doctor next week just so he can tell me well tough shit pal

[Anonymous No.14697541]

>>14697517
Damn, I want to hear the continuation of this. It's much more entertaining than OP's faggy story, anyway.
I hope you make a thread

[Anonymous No.14697616]

>>14697541
I will bro