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/lit/ - Literature

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14681694 No.14681694 [Reply] [Original]

What is a book that nearly made you commit suicide?

>> No.14681698

>>14681694
Liber Null and Psychonaut.

>> No.14681704

>>14681694
It should be your favourite book, which you will never match or exceed

>> No.14681719

The Elementary Particles

>> No.14681730

The Sorrows of Young Werther. That "I treat my heart like a sick child and gratify its every fancy" line sticks with me. I have become too sentimental because of it and need to find more discipline. The quote about the horses also stuck with me.
>I wanted one person to dare reproach me so I could drive a dagger through his body; if I could see blood I would feel better. Oh, I have grabbed a knife a hundred times to ease this oppressed heart! They tell of a noble race of horses that, when they are terribly driven and overheated, instinctively bite open a vein to help themselves breathe. I often feel that way, I would like to open one of my veins, to bring me eternal freedom.
Reading The Iliad immediately after didn't help.

>> No.14681779

>>14681694
What’s a good book to recommend to trannies to get them to 41%? Preferably one that is not overtly anti tranny.

>> No.14681798

>>14681694
My diary desu

>> No.14681804

>>14681779
Why do you hate trans folks?

>> No.14681819

>>14681804
They turned my brother into a tranny

>> No.14681907

>>14681694
No, but American Psycho made me feel homicidal and insanely misanthropic for a while.

>> No.14681925

>>14681819
*sister

>> No.14681936

>>14681907
I read it many years ago and to this day I can still remember a lot of that book visually. Especially when he slaughters that kid in the zoo

>> No.14681961

>>14681779
Based. They don't read though. They're brain dead and estrogen just makes them dumber. Just get them a mirror.

>> No.14681966
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14681966

>> No.14681974

>>14681966
> Excerpt

'What is the taste of bread? That of the first piece I eat when I am hungry or the one I eat after, when I am full? What is the smell of roast? The good, dear aroma that overpowers all other smells and wafts about me as I search in vain for food, or that of the piece left over on my table? And the eye, what does the eye see? I truly believe that everyone can experience the dubious sight of one’s eye and be uncertain as to the faces of those closest to him. Look at the face of a friend you trust and you find a noble visage. You locate the nobility either in the nose or the forehead or “a certain something of the eyes”; look at him when he has betrayed you and you see a vile mouth, a sinister glance, “an expression that’s just not right.” (And if one looks at a woman before and after one has had one’s way with her, the contradiction strikes even more stridently). What is the experience of reality? If I am hungry, reality is nothing more to me than an ensemble of more or less edible things. If I am thirsty, reality is more or less liquid, and more or less potable. If I am sleepy, it is a great bed more or less hard. If I am not hungry, not thirsty, not sleepy, and do not need any other determinate thing, the world is a large ensemble of grays that are I don’t know what but that certainly are not made to cheer me up.'

>> No.14682041

>>14681730
i remember reading werther in my 3rd year of college after getting rejected by a beautiful woman and i was on the verge of suicide/panic attacks every other day. shit was so not cash.

>> No.14682043

>>14682041
lol what a pussy

>> No.14682049

>>14682043
cringe and not-helpful-pilled

>> No.14682119

None. I'm a sane individual

>> No.14682132

>>14681936
The part I remember most vividly is the bit where he eats the brown substance from the prostitutes intestines.

>> No.14682145

>>14681694
Propaganda by Ellul

>> No.14682334

>>14682145
The Technological Society was some pretty strong suifuel as well

>> No.14682360

>>14681798
Based author-reader-character-pilled

>> No.14682364

>>14682334
This one got me

>> No.14682375

>>14681694
Johnny Got His Gun, but mostly because I was already feeling suicidal when I started it

>>14681719
This too

>> No.14682535

>>14682375
How come books about horrible things happening to innocent people make people want to kill themselves?

>> No.14682579
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14682579

>>14681694
"Abaddon el Exterminador" by Ernesto Sabato
a journey through some of the author's most personal and depressing thoughts, capped off by the (minutiously narrated) torture and murder of one of the main characters

>>14681719
at least this one shows a light at the end of the tunnel, something new and pure could be born from all the horror.
The future depicted in "The Possibility of an Island" dashes such a hope. It also does what Houllebecq's most depressing books do: put you in the mind of the most hopeless, cynical and callow characters, with no real foil to provide respite.

>> No.14682606

>>14682119
This. I'm not even sane and I can't imagine a book pushing me over the edge.

>> No.14682740

Stephen Florida. Bit of mishima, dfw, and dostoyevsky. Death idealism, existential boredom, antisocial schizoid character

>Suicide tourism, organized, thought-out trips to Cambodia, the Netherlands, Switzerland, places where euthanasia is legal. If I looked closely at my fingers, at the paper cuts, and squeezed, I could make them talk like little mouths. This felt good. Sitting at a shaky basement library table, looking this up, getting cuts from studying. But Mary Beth was right. I was never more than a casual suicide-thinker, gazing up at the rafters of the cafeteria and failing to imagine one of them holding my full weight, as though the body dangling up there was an actor, or a dummy in a wig stuffed with straw.

>> No.14682745

>>14681694
The Tartar Steppe. It instilled in me a sense of urgency to live life fully and at the same time made me feel so powerless and hopeless against the flow of time. Maybe dying young in a blaze of glory is the best death you can have. I still think about this book everyday.

>> No.14683842

Not technically a proper book, but my younger sister made me read a fan fiction she wrote about me and MC Ride from Death Grips. She was given a creative writing task for her English class, and out of all the things she could have written about she wrote about me. I'm shocked her teacher gave her an A despite how stupid the plot line was.

>> No.14683884

>>14681925
>>14681819
*sister (formerly brother)

>> No.14683894

>>14681694
I tried to elevate my suicidal tendencies by reading Tolstoy but that didnt help. If anything Confession made me even more miserable.

>> No.14683909

the Bitcoin Standard

>> No.14684982
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14684982

>> No.14685013

>>14681974
>a full page of babble just to explain gibsonian affordances in a gay way

yeh nah

>> No.14685127

>>14683884
sneedster

>> No.14685161

>>14682145
I've read the bernays version of propaganda and manufacturing consent by chomsky. does ellul cover any new ground?

>>14682334

Does the technological society cover any new ground?

This shit fascinates me. The status quo always seemed to be the outcome of people who understood change and control. It could have been anything and for some knowable reason it became this.

>> No.14685207

>>14681966
>perception is relative wah wah

>> No.14685221

Reading 'No Longer Human' right now and it’s hard to endure for me, I can relate so deeply I feel the narrator’s pain very much. I just avoided people more than him, so my own experiences haven’t been quite as dreadful.

>> No.14685682

>>14681698
I read those and I don't get why every pop "occultist" falls so much for those memes?

>> No.14685737

>>14681719
This one here. Was nearly two months sober and as soon as I closed the book after finishing it, I knew I was gonna fall off the wagon. Made it 48 hrs after that.

>> No.14685752

>>14681779
This. Preferably one that is appealing to Landian accel trannies/sissies.

>> No.14685852
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14685852

>> No.14685866

Survivor by Chuck Palahniuk when I was a 16 tear old faggot lol

>> No.14685894

our lady of the flowers

>> No.14685969

>>14682041
Its a book for 16 year olds

>> No.14686068
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14686068

Wow. This thread. You are all hate filled psychopathic wizards. Not the cringy kind. Legit fuckos with reasonable evil. I fear it.

>> No.14686072

>>14683909
what about it made you go to that sort of place?

>> No.14686109

>>14681694
Stoner. However, I’ve decided after a lot of thought that I actually am going to do it. It’s just a matter of when now

>> No.14686149

>>14686109
How do you debunk the alternatives to death? such as living to feel, hedonism, stoicism, etc.

>> No.14686538

>>14681694
The book of disquiet made me so sad I don't even feel worthy of killing myself

>> No.14686671

>>14681694
Quantum Mechanics, Leslie E. Ballentine

>> No.14686678

There was once a period of time where all I read was Ligotti (specifically Teatro Grottesco, as each story had a total "restrictiveness" and total restraint of humanity that I could relate to) Schopenhauer, Land (Thirst for Annihilation), and some poems from Mainlander. Due to a fit of insomnia that lasted a few days each week, I would hallucinate being tethered to the sky by a strange, foreboding force; the hallucinations also included shadow people, and all of my thoughts practically screaming to hang myself immediately. My mind would be utterly aflame, and even total strangers exchanged worried looks at me due to how disheveled and feverish I looked. Even though this happened two years ago, most of my temptations since then still sit at the back of my mind.

>> No.14686898

>>14685852
This.
Great book.

>> No.14687647

>>14686068
What manga?

>> No.14687922

>>14681694
The Waste Land by TS Eliot. Spent way too much time thinking about it/analyzing

>> No.14687982

>>14685161
Ellul’s definitely worth reading in my opinion.

>> No.14687987

>>14681719
only right answer

>> No.14688283

>>14681798
There it is

>> No.14688317

>>14681694
Ironically enough the Pali Canon, I had built up this careful identity of being a 'scientific' meditator who wasn't fooled by religous dogmas and who followed a logical system based on empiricism and phenomenology and then when I actually read the source texts Buddha is claiming all sorts of miracles and supernatural abilities and talking about Gods and heavens and even psychically showing his retracted penis to people. It made me feel like my whole identity was a fraud.