solitude vs loneliness

[Anonymous No.14673638]

Grew up as an only child, never had a friend untill 18, playing vidya, no father, unstable mother, don’t like big groups bla bla you know the archetype. I always struggled with loneliness, and the paralyzing effect it has on me (especially in summer, loneliness in winter feels much less paralyzing somehow). I never really hated the world, never hated women, just disappointed I never found a place in society.
Vipassana, Buddhism, especially Stephen Batchelor’s explanations of the pali canon helped me deal or accept loneliness better. So did Safranski’s biography on Nietzsche. Jane Eyre, To the lighthouse and many other works of fiction and non-fiction. And yes even 4channel, /lit/ and /out/ are the only boards I really got to know over the years and actually helped me a great deal, they feel less like the sperging self pitying feedback loops found on other boards. Anyhow, The last years I started to discover some fertile ground in this loneliness, started making ‘art’, having some success, making enough coins, had a kid etc. I realized i want/need to be alone, a lot, I guess most people drain me even those I love. But still I did not master being alone, sometimes I still get stuck in a longing to belong, or start suppressing loneliness by fucking around in cyberspace, not doing any creative work.
Any anons mastered the art of solitude? Any tips (lit or whatever) that helped you?

[Anonymous No.14673720]

unironically pic related

[Anonymous No.14673777]

>>14673638
You are eternally doomed to be this way, there is no escape - god has made you this way. So just embrace it and think about all the things that being lonely provides you with (mainly more time and thus more energy)

[Anonymous No.14673792]

>>14673638
>Any tips that helped you?
Have a routine, find something productive to put your time into, be content, do not despair.
t. NEET for ~5 years

[Anonymous No.14673794]

>>14673777
Following your own logic, if God deems OP "worthy" he'll send some of this >>14673720 in OP's direction. Drugs can change a person, for better or worse.

[Anonymous No.14673807]

>>14673794

Yes but considering how much of a wreck OP is (I only say this because I'm similar) the only way he could be changed is 'up' so to speak.

[Anonymous No.14673808]

>>14673638
>sometimes I still get stuck in a longing to belong
I don't think anyone can really completely shake this feeling, and there is nothing wrong with that.

[Anonymous No.14673839]

I really liked Stephen batchelor's books, especially "Buddhism without beliefs"

"Solitude" by Anthony Storr is a great book
"[solitude]... challenges the widely-held view that success in personal relationships is the only key to happiness. It argues that we pay far too little attention to some of the other great satisfactions of life - work and creativity. In a series of biographical sketches it demonstrates how many of the creative geniuses of our civilization have been solitary, by temperament or circumstance, and how the capacity to be alone is, even for those who are not creative, a sign of maturity."

"A Book Of Silence" by Sarah Maitland is really worth a read. It follows the journey of the author who aims to live like a hermit.

"The Strange Last Voyage of Donald Crowhurst" by Nicholas Tomhurst is a great book about someone going mad in solitude.

[Anonymous No.14673869]

>>14673839
>le spirituality without actually commiting to an actual belief

This is peak faggotry, at least make a call and stop being such a pussy

[Anonymous No.14674064]

>>14673839
thanks anon will read

[Anonymous No.14674285]

>>14673638
based maldoror poster

[Anonymous No.14675427]

if you already managed to 'make art' then you already got the answer. just focus that on yourself not on others. thats the only source from which you can let your mind shape your vision to fit a given condition or situation.

reading is of course of great help, but at some point one has to let all tat be assimilated and then make something for ones own use. making art for others is a waste before you do it just for yourself.

read and reread lautreamont. there is a lot in that book.

[Anonymous No.14675662]

As for myself, I have always been surrounded by friends yet in my current state after undertaking a rigorous collection of readings, I much keep to myself, ignoring the calls of my friends, in self-imposed isolation. I have had a frenetic and hedonistic adolescence. I am completely disinterested in going to clubs or parties given it is something that in the past I have overdone greatly which is great because it reassures me that I am not missing out on anything as rewarding as reading and acquiring knowledge which brings you closer to your goals.
Though I do maintain a serried "comradery" with my political contacts with which in the future I am going to articulate my vocation for political struggle in the formation of an embryonic political movement.

[Anonymous No.14675674]

>>14673638

>>14675662
Cultivate your spirit. Fix yourself on a goal that transcends your mere self. Aggregate individuals who share your same mission. Live communally with your brethren. Stop fapping.

[Anonymous No.14675704]

>>14673777
Blessed trips of Christ

I think "doomed" is maybe too pejorative to describe this state of being, however. Yes, God has placed you in your present circumstances but he has also given you the free will to embrace or overcome your loneliness.

During my teens I was extremely lonely and didn't have anyone who understood my problems. Not saying I was the only one like this but looking back, I see that God, in creating my loneliness, drew me away from other things that would have lead me astray. Where it not for my loneliness, I'd never have discovered my love for literature and, hence, ended up here talking to you now anon. That's ineluctable providence, from which no one can escape nor should they try to.

[Anonymous No.14675708]

>>14675704
*were