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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/lit/ - Literature

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13926366 No.13926366 [Reply] [Original]

>the library shaman won't stop chanting

>> No.13926368

>>13926366
>the library pervert won't stop masturbating

>> No.13926393
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13926393

>>13926366
proof or didnt happen

>> No.13926433

>>13926366
Be thankful, his efforts are keeping the Kantgoblin at bay.

>> No.13926442
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13926442

>the librarian priestess keeps stealing my sperm for her rituals

>> No.13927964

The librarians have been on break for the last hour and a half and I needed to leave 20 minutes ago!

>> No.13928065
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13928065

>someone upstairs opened the necronomicon without first performing the proper rituals
>entire library smells of sulfur, unending wails can be heard from the upper floor
>so gloomy inside that i can't even read without candles
>have to until sunday when the necrosages will come to cleanse the building

>> No.13928917

>>13926366
Small price to pay, if it wasn't for him it would be
>The spirits of the hungry ancestors won't stop seeking offerings for a repose from their astral wandering

>> No.13929103
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13929103

>turns out the Read Along Illuminates group was a sting operation
>suddenly yelling upstairs, sounds of a struggle
>someone voice overpowers the commotion, speaking an unfamiliar language
>pretty sure I just felt an earthquake
>gunshots
>combat librarians rush into building from all entrances
>archivist tells me to relocate to a secured sector of the facility
What the fuck is going on

>> No.13929141

>the library hobo is sleeping in the middle of the bathroom floor
happened this morning

>> No.13929152

>>13926366
>mfw when the library lubeman switches to Crisco

>> No.13929177
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13929177

>The Philosophy Department cancelled our monthly execution

>> No.13929260
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13929260

>it's frapuccino hour at the library starbucks, and they asked me to stop turning book pages so they could hear the blenders

>> No.13929276

>>13926366
>library dog wont stop peeing on my bag
why is this even allowed

>> No.13929298
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13929298

>>13926366
>the school library got rid of all the philosophy books because they stopped teaching philosophy 3 years ago.

>> No.13930512

>>13929260
just go sit elsewhere

>> No.13930683

>the library hot dog stand is out of relish

>> No.13930830
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13930830

>Hegel wizard won’t stop drawing triangles and selling salvia
>library falcon won’t stop stealing books for its nest
>Kantgoblin keeps stealing my epistemological basis for a metaphysics of spirit
>library hot dog stand out of mustard again
>manlets in the pit won’t stop reading Pynchon

>> No.13930847
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13930847

>the local library has only 70 books about our great chairman

>> No.13931410

>library mice organizing a bloody takeover of the cafeteria
>library computer becomes sentient and is trying to use subliminal messaging on the elderly