Confess

[Anonymous No.13585795]

Get it off your chest, anon.

[Anonymous No.13585863]

I use big words that I don’t really know in order to get taken seriously. I keep on postponing attending mass. This past year I’ve been incapable of going without unnecessarily delicious food. I want to live an ascetic lifestyle but my brain is convinced I need the internet more than I actually do. Will try blocking a few more apps today. I ate my uncle’s jarred rice pudding. Always need to eat to fill the emptiness. Just when I think I’ve discovered my meaning I slightly swerve to different behaviours. I love reading but I can only do about 4 hours a day. Rest of day is spent listening to music and talking to myself. Sometimes I talk to other people but it feels like talking to parrots, all I really get out of it is small talk and other forms of conversation with little to no substance. I want to move out one day and become an independent researcher, even if I end up earning just enough money to survive.

[Anonymous No.13585868]

the recent mass shootings make me scared to go outside

[Anonymous No.13585878]

>>13585795
I just had a slice of pizza, some spicy Cheetos and chocolate with grape juice and now I'm smoking a cigarette ready to read until fall asleep (I didn't ate since yesterday) feelsgood.png

[Anonymous No.13585930]

Life seems to be moving way faster recently. Sometimes I start to think about events that happened 3-4 years ago but my brain believes that they happened 1-2 years ago. It’s either me who’s going mad or time is moving too fast for me to comprehend it

[Anonymous No.13586078]

>>13585795
I stole a copy of the new testament from my local library

[Anonymous No.13586183]

I'm way too hard on myself and try to be perfect all the time.

[Anonymous No.13586238]

all i want is to listen to some qt talk about some shit i dont really care about but still listen to her with all of my attention so i can just hear her voice

[Anonymous No.13586280]

>>13585795
I had a chance to be with a beautiful Armenian girl in Barcelona a few years ago. But I didn't, and my life went to shit right after. But I still think about her everyday. I know I'm idealizing her and I'm pathetic but its the only thing that keeps me sane and feeling alive.

[Anonymous No.13586287]

>>13585795
I blame my ADHD for everything, because i'm scared of my flaws

[Anonymous No.13586346]

Hearing confessions while not being a clergy member is an excommunicable offense, anon.

[Anonymous No.13586426]

>>13586280
I had a chance to date the girl I've liked for two years now, but another girl that I liked half as much asked me out and I said yes - the former was so disappointed at me we basically became friendly acquintances. She got a random boyfriend, me and the girl who asked me out could never get a proper relationship rolling.
I feel bad because of both of them.

[Anonymous No.13586434]

I read translations and fap to both Hentai and live-action

[Anonymous No.13586485]

I avoid intimacy and push away people who try to get close to me because of life long feelings of inadequacy, worthlessness, fear of being intimate with others, guilt, and probable autism. I will probably be dead by my own hand before the age of 35

[Anonymous No.13586499]

I don't know if I love my girlfriend anymore. She seems to really love me, but I just don't know anymore. But I still love her enough that I don't want to hurt her by leaving her and now I feel trapped. This is the third time that I'm in this position, always after two years of the relationships. I will end up hurting someone again and I hate myself for it. Maybe I should just stay with her to make her happy, I don't even care anymore, I'm miserable either way, so why not at least keep another person happy along the way?
At least I still got my books.

[Anonymous No.13586506]

I'm hanging out with a guy who I think is an asshole just so I can get closer to a girl he is friends with, and once I become friends with her, I'm basically going to ghost his ass.
I weighed the morality of this and come to terms that I don't give a fuck.

[Anonymous No.13586534]

>>13585795

I'm in love. This time for real, I feel it, I've never felt like this before. This is not just another random infatuation. I think she likes me too, she comes over a lot to hang out, cook, drink and play guitar. These meetings are basically dates. The only problem is she's already in a six year relationship and I'm in a two year relationship. I feel horrible but I can't stop myself. Nothing happened yet but goddamn I don't know if I can keep this up without doing something horrible that will make me hate myself forever. I'm basically turning into my father, repeating the same terrible actions, hurting my mother and some other guy in the process. Just like his father before him. I know what I have to do, but I feel unable to break this cycle, I feel like I have cursed blood, unable to change the course of the oncoming events that are unfolding, like a spectator, watching and experiencing this horrible play of deceit and hurt through somebody else's eyes, I feel empty and disassociated from my body at times.

[Anonymous No.13586599]

>>13586078
D-did you tear the bible in half and leave the older testament there?

[Anonymous No.13586620]

>>13586280
should've boned her bro
>>13586346
so be it, amen
>>13586434
translations are ok.
>confess
saged

[Anonymous No.13586652]

>>13586599
Nah I don't like destroying stuff, I'd rather sell them instead

[Anonymous No.13588214]

>>13586620
Rep
Ört
Ed

[Anonymous No.13588270]

>>13585795
I am afraid to put more of me into relationships because I am afraid it will only make it worse for me. Been like that since i broke up after a 6year old relationship. Since then I have 1) got angry on a great girl for trying to help me 2) never really gave a new girlfriend the love I could give and now this girl has somehow helped me in her own way and keeps calling me even though I keep avoiding. I have a decision to make now, she is out on a internship program for a month and has requested me to come there the one day she will be free but I am just too afraid to go. She might just give up eventually if I keep being like this. There is nothing to be afraid of but I can’t commit at all. I feel broken.

[Anonymous No.13588277]

They’re supposed to be book related you fucking fags, jesus.

[Anonymous No.13588282]

>>13588277
What were the 2 magical words...oh yeah “suck it”

[Anonymous No.13588370]

I've never been to, uuh, I don't even know what it's called, church on Sunday.

[Anonymous No.13588374]

>>13585795
Mommy still wiped me at 15

[Anonymous No.13588419]

Man why are all anons here so broken? Women truly are a curse on the soul

[Anonymous No.13588502]

i read and enjoy warhammer 40k novels.. i would literally buy the entire horus heresy saga if i could

[Anonymous No.13588604]

>>13588502

I think of them as the book equivalent of fun and trashy action films, like Commando or Missing in Action.

As for my /lit/ confession, I've slogged through many classics just because they are classics, not because I liked them. Moby Dick, Don Quixote and As I Lay Dying were real chores. It doesn't help that English isn't my first language and I read them in English.

[Anonymous No.13588632]

>>13588419
This a confession thread. You're reading a biased sample

[Anonymous No.13588754]

>>13585795
I cheated on my ex over six times and never necessarily felt any emotion or guilt over it, mostly felt the need to hide the fact from her so I didn’t upset her.

She’s gone now, after I got into a drunken argument over her never wanting to have kids. She was only 20, but as a 23 year old I guess I expected too much. It was really nice with her, though. Almost made it a year dating, and was quite honestly the most satisfying year of my life. Now life’s gone back to a depressing grey.

Without a girlfriend life’s pretty empty again. I’ve never been good at friends, always had this tendency to lose interest in a person a short while after meeting them. Feel like there must be a word for someone like me; lonely but not alone, friendless but no trouble making friends, good looking, 10/10 athleticism, 130 iq (weschler test), upper class parents but a college dropout.

Life’s on easy mode for me, most of the time, but there’s never been any satisfaction. Grew up as the middle child between an older brother who’s in every way just s talented as me, and a younger sister who steals everyone’s heart. If anyone has book suggestions for getting over being overlooked and underpicked your whole life, maybe this could help.

Pic related is me

[Anonymous No.13588833]

>>13588604
>Moby Dick was a chore
I guess you're not from New England
I slogged through Ulysses for my Dublin vacation. It had 3 good chapters.
Quote from the Maine hermit, who was the most successful burglarer in history and lived without heat inna woods for decades.
>he wished he had more Edna St. Vincent Millay around (a fellow Mainer), and his comments about Joyce’s Ulysses “What’s the point of it? I suspect it was a bit of a joke by Joyce…. Pseudo-intellectuals love to drop the name Ulysses as their favorite book. I refused to be intellectually bullied into finishing it.”

[Anonymous No.13588992]

I love reading, even though foreign sentence in the book translated from another foreign language makes it harder to digest. Recently an incident in the workplace made me depressed, and suddenly I don't feel like reading anything anymore.

[Anonymous No.13589172]

I read The Fault in Our Stars and thought it was decent. I wasn't even underage and the end made me tear up a little.

[Anonymous No.13589690]

I thought I could help a (female) coworker who was in a bad family situation and succumbed to more carnal desires with her. At this time I was also discerning diocesan seminary and shortly into it several realizations about myself made me back away from that. I attempted to maintain the relationship as being the nature it started out, but we kept getting more physical. I didn't want to be in a relationship but I was too much of a weakling to tell her this and I enjoyed the physical aspect of the relationship. She got pregnant (I think, it was pretty early and all I had to go off of was a premonition and her pheromones and attitude changing). I felt overwhelmed and became distant. She got depressed and attempted suicide. She ended up being ok, but if she was pregnant she no longer was after that. After that a friend of mine became serious with her and she lost interest in me after that. About a year later she called me up asking me for money to help with a violation ticket or something and I told her I didn't have any to give her even if I wanted to because I was spending my summer volunteering with Jesuits once again discerning the priesthood. I tried to talk to her about the hurt that we both experienced but I got the sense that she either didn't care or didn't remember it. After this whole fiasco I ended up getting deeper into my faith and it helped me cope with the emotional damage that I experienced and the realization that I can have a profoundly influence in somebody's life. I've learned from this, among other things, that I need to be careful of the situations I expose myself to and the relationships that I have with people. This was about 3 years ago now, but it was only recently that I've been able to speak to women in a friendly way without being afraid of the harm that I am capable of inflicting. Now, I try to be more conscious of my own weaknesses and capabilities so that if I feel like somebody needs help then I can try directing them to more competent help than myself.

[Anonymous No.13589696]

>>13585868
Me too anon, and I live in the UK

[Anonymous No.13589822]

>>13586183
me too buddy

[Anonymous No.13589855]

>>13589172
Me too. The way the characters talked was extremely cringe but overall it’s a decent book. Totally fine for teenagers.

[Anonymous No.13590126]

>>13585795
I read the unholy mess that are Frank Herbert's son's Dune books before i read actual dune and liked them.
Granted that was ages ago and id probably hate them now but god damn.

[Anonymous No.13590513]

why’d god make evryone i know attractive and me look like shit. my mum was a stacy in her youth and my dad was a chad. He was 6’3” green eyes, light skin, charismatic fucking everything. I got short height from my mother, dark skin, shitty brown eyes and the only trait i got from my father was his bit nose which he can pull off due to his other traits but just adds to my shit fuck look. I just am so fucking pissed off, i put so much effort in, I pray, I study, I work out, I read and still all the fucking degenrates I know are 10/10s and curse God every day. WHY THE FUCK DID THIS HAPPEN WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS
I dont even want to look good to get a gf ive given up on that a long time ago I just dont want to be a dissapointment to my father, I cant stand next to him anymore without feeling disheartened. I dont deserve this.

sorry for the rant anons, and the bad grammar

[Anonymous No.13590539]

>>13590513
Take the blackpill and leave society

[Anonymous No.13590558]

>>13590539
what do you mean leave society? I never go out because I just don’t identify with the culture. I read at home, go to the gym without talking to anyone, don’t look at girls as to not torture myself, eat, sleep.

What else do I do?

only reason i dont go live in the woods is I have to take care of my sick grandmother because nobody else will

[Anonymous No.13590591]

>>13588754
>good looking

Nice try bro, you look a little gross

[Anonymous No.13590643]

>>13585795
Why do people treat me so poorly? Do I really deserve so much hatred and abuse? People should be kinder to each other.

[Anonymous No.13591588]

>>13585863
>I use big words that I don’t really know in order to get taken seriously
I got into this habit in high school. It was a very small high school so I was the smartest student there and I was able to get away with using words I didn't totally understand because I knew nobody would call me on it. I still do it now as a slightly more humble adult sometimes.

[Anonymous No.13591735]

Man you guys are fucked.

[Anonymous No.13591864]

I have a weird desire to both be the most private person on the planet but also share things that I enjoy with others on social media and that. You know what I mean? Like projects, my thoughts, what I do, etc. Not too much, obviously, but just some things I find interesting.

[Anonymous No.13592565]

I keep breaking chasity and I don't know what to say to God anymore. I don't know if it's pride holding me back, but it's led me to feel horrible.

[Anonymous No.13592950]

>>13585795
jerked off in my mom's panties and jerked off to sissy porn. Whew!!!

[Anonymous No.13592974]

I feel a bit scared that I won't find a job anytime soon. It seems that for some reason I don't match the requirements that those companies have and some failed interviews that I had make me feel a bit bad about myself. I know it's probably temporary and things will change for the better and that nothing is permanent but still this sinking feeling clings on a bit.

[Anonymous No.13592978]

>>13589696
I don't blame you, imagine if some crazy guy got a gun in the UK, he could easily wipe out an entire town himself armed with a pistol. Wasn't there some guy who did just that a couple of years ago and they had to sent the military in to get him

[Anonympus No.13592980]

I have wasted si Manu women Now I would give anything for a day with one of them, most of them we're good but I married the most beautiful bitch on Earth And she was such a bitch that left me completelly ruined

[Anonympus No.13592995]

Same as above Thats me

[lalo No.13592998]

I mean Thats me

[Anonymous No.13593001]

I'm a complete piece of shit to women. I draw them in with this persona of being traditional, self-respecting, a paragon of morality, etc. and on some surface level I believe that to be accurate. But the reality is that I fuck around on girls relentlessly. No I never cheat or take it to turning into physical contact, but I absolutely play the field and keep my options very open. I hold my girlfriends up to these very high standards of fidelity and responsibility to not put themselves in situations that would disrespect me, and for the most part they do. Meanwhile I've got 3-6 other girls on reserve at all times that I'm talking to that I know are into me and me into them.

It doesn't go beyond light flirting but it essentially means that I can't commit to any girl completely. I'm so intense with holding girls to these ridiculously high standards because I know I myself don't meet them at all. I'm the exact piece of shit I try to avoid with girls. I am everything I hate and everything I fear. I can hide behind the excuse of being cheated on making me unable to commit myself fully and never give myself over completely to any one girl but at the end of the day I'm just a complete manipulative hypocritical loser.

[Anonymous No.13593029]

>>13585868
You need to purge yourself of media influence because shlomo has fried your brain. Stop reading the news altogether for a solid month.
It is completely insane to be concerned to the point of non-functionality by such a rare and bizarre possibility (unless you live in spic or niggerland, and even then it would be more typical crime rather than schizo 'mass shooting').
You'd consider someone strange for not going outside out of fear of poisonous frogs and you have more chance dying of contact with a poisonous frog.