/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.13384206]

When was the last time you actually felt alive?

>16 years old
>Hopped on a bus to Dublin, threw my phone and bank cards into a river but kept some cash
>Didn't really know what I was doing, just felt like I should do this
>Wandered around town for a few hours, then sat all night in a bus shelter in the freezing cold waiting for the first bus home
>Fell asleep on the bus for 2 hours and got woken up by the driver
>That 20 minute walk home was bliss, I was in heaven, I felt invincible and completely at peace with everything
Everything before and since has just been a blur of drowsy meaninglessness, drifting through life.

[Anonymous No.13384286]

>>13384206
What does feeling alive feel like?

[Anonymous No.13384324]

>>13384286
If you'd ever felt it you'd know, if you haven't no one can tell you.

[Anonymous No.13384328]

>>13384206
when i choked your whore mother while fucking her gypsy asshole

[Anonymous No.13384336]

>>13384328
Some people don't care about their mothers so insults like this do nothing to them, get better material

[Anonymous No.13385002]

>>13384206
>today
>ride bicycle fast
>everything's better now

[Anonymous No.13385016]

I don’t need some bullshit forced narrative or mental justification for being alive, and so every day I enjoy being alive

[Anonymous No.13385038]

>>13384336
>i hate mummy
wow, you're an edgy one

[Anonymous No.13385054]

>>13384206
That was comfy. Thanks Eireanon

[Anonymous No.13385179]

>>13385038
>Hate is the same as apathy

[Anonymous No.13386225]

>>13385002
:)

[Anonymous No.13386337]

>>13384206
Why would you go up to that kip of a city? Only good thing about Dublin is the road out of it, problem is, you have to use that to get into it aswell.

[Anonymous No.13386487]

I crashed my car into a ditch during a blizzard in New Mexico.

[Anonymous No.13386512]

When something slips out of my hands and my reflexes catch it. In that moment, I am hyper focused, there are no other thoughts or feelings I involuntarily become nothing more than a man trying to catch his glasses as they fall off his face.

[Anonymous No.13386513]

>>13384206
I haven't.

[Anonymous No.13386571]

>>13384206
Basically the same but instead it was sitting in Connolly Station for 5 hours after having woken up at 3am in a Chinese restaurants bathroom with my phone being stolen. Watching the sunrise through the cables, metal supports, and white and red signal lights while the icy cold pierced deep into my skin made me feel truly alive.

[Anonymous No.13386589]

the summer i lived in my car

[Anonymous No.13386603]

>>13384206
when i was a teenager i felt alive all the time. i had some very close friends, the hottest girls were fighting over me, i would intentionally do things that broke the boundaries of what was acceptable, for instance i'd be sitting in class and hear it start raining and i'd literally just get up and leave and go outside to walk in the rain. i'd get a detention but i didn't care. every day i was with friends or girls running around town living it up, and not like "whoa bro let's get lit" but like legitimately enjoying each other's company, things like smoking the devil's lettuce all night and going to ihop at five in the morning baked and exhausted and then going back to one of our houses and sleeping in a massive heap of friends. all the details of the moment, any moment, whether it was all of us huddled in a mini van at a traffic stop and the red green and yellow glowed brightly in the evening gloam, or we were giggling throughout a walmart, hit deeply and were beautiful.
but that was a long time ago. trying to get back to a life like that.

[Anonymous No.13386613]

>>13386603
I was that chink that you guys laughed at.

[Anonymous No.13386617]

>>13384206
When I get too baked and all the physical things seem logically connected, deterministic. It's kind of scary but nice at the same time.

[Anonymous No.13386622]

i havent been excited about anything non drug related for a long time, in fact i cant even remember when was the last time

[Anonymous No.13386646]

>>13386613
nah, we were funloving. we weren't the "cool kids" in the stereotypical sense, that was the jocks. we were the "cool kids" that broke the rules, took nothing seriously and offered smokes to the kids that were picked on. we clashed with the asshole chads on some Grease type shit pretty often lol.

[Anonymous No.13386656]

>>13384206
Mate, that sounds like bipolar disorder

[Anonymous No.13386667]

>>13384206
The day I regained the use of my bowels after waking up from my seven day coma. tl;dr i thought i was farting, turned out to be a shit, world renowned cardiologist wiping my ass and thighs with his residents who were like yale rhodes scholars, and i remember saying in the midst of it all, "you know, i really shit the bed on this one, didn't i, doctor" and the room erupted with laughter. and then everything felt all right.

[Anonymous No.13386683]

>>13386667
thats some sitcom shit

[Anonymous No.13386700]

>>13386683
if i told you i was typing this from a 1200 acre commune, would you believe me?

[Anonymous No.13386736]

>>13386603
how do i get this as an adult :(

[Anonymous No.13386755]

>>13386736
go to bar. drink alcohol. talk to other people. when they are done talking they will make it known and not think about you ever again. there isn't even the threat of failure. everyone else is drinking alcohol as well. please go outside

[Anonymous No.13386759]

>>13386736
dunno (i wrote it), like i said i'm trying to get back to that. videos like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wISgLn-dBNM prove to me that it's not just a teenage thing. just have to make friends again somehow, and the right friends.

[Anonymous No.13386827]

>>13386700
can i come live there anon

[Anonymous No.13386871]

>>13384206
Went for a run at 6 am today, huge amounts of birds flying around, great weather, some friendly old people passing me on bikes, life felt great.
You can only escape that meaninglessness if you actually get off your ass and do things you wouldn´t normally do. Be it sports, travel, events, anything. You could even just go to church again and talk to the pastor about it, better than being dreary all the time.

[Anonymous No.13386914]

>>13386871
God I wish I could wake up at 6 am and go for a run. It gets too warm here during the day so I just rot in my room.

[Anonymous No.13386921]

>>13386914
I would probably just fucking die if tried that at noon too. But its okay here if you go at dawn, fairly cold night today.

[Anonymous No.13386977]

>>13386603
my life at that time was just valueless social and physical competition/isolation with braindead animals, im glad to be rid of it. now 19. im convinced everyone in this day is somewhat sociopathic. what age are you from that you could have this?

also i feel you on the rain bit, not for breaking boundaries, i just despise comfort (as the rule rather than exception) and lack of experiences.

[Anonymous No.13387288]

When I went backpacking overseas. I genuinely forgot who I was, or who society expected me to be. I was simply a traveling consciousness.

[Anonymous No.13387300]

>>13387288
How do people afford to go travelling all over the world?

[Anonymous No.13387307]

>>13384206
Nice blog
"/lit/ is for the discussion of literature, specifically books (fiction & non-fiction), short stories, poetry, creative writing, etc."

[Anonymous No.13387318]

>>13387300
wealthy parents or hard work, saving money

[Anonymous No.13387323]

>>13384206
This is the gayest shit I've ever read. At least Chris Mccandless went to Alaska. All you did is walk around a town for a little while. Fucking sheltered little baby man

[Anonymous No.13387333]

Passport got stolen in Amsterdam so I spent a couple weeks traveling around Holland alone waiting for shit to get sorted in the Hague so I could go home. Met some interesting people, felt very vulnerable, stayed with a guy who owned rottweilers. Pretty kino

[Anonymous No.13387382]

>>13387323
based and redpilled. OP needs a kick up the hole if he thinks thats gang shit.

[Anonymous No.13387387]

>>13384206
When I was camping in the winter and looking for forests to settle in. I ended up trying to look for one spot at 10 pm when it was raining like hell. It felt awful then but now it seemed amazing

[Anonymous No.13387388]

>>13387300
If you're a western European it can be very cheap to travel around western europe as long as you're ok with shitty hostels. Southern Asia very cheap as well after you get there

[Anonymous No.13387393]

>>13386603
Based Richard Linklater poster

[Anonymous No.13387398]

>>13384206
Read 'An Encounter' from Joyce's Dubliners if you haven't already, OP

[Anonymous No.13387417]

>>13384286
Stop watching anime and maybe you'll find out.

[Anonymous No.13387421]

>>13387288
can someone help a retard that has no idea how to backpack? i have about £3k saved. Anything would be appreciated :)

[Anonymous No.13387448]

>>13387421
Do something like the Pacific Crest Trail in the United States. You'll learn as you go. 3k is plenty

[Anonymous No.13387455]

>>13387417
Why is /lit/ always trashing anime? It's fun

[Anonymous No.13387456]

>>13387300
Lived super cheaply and saved like crazy.

[Anonymous No.13387464]

>>13387421
You have more than enough to go anywhere except Japan. Plan your route beforehand or else prepare for shit hostels. Learn a bit of cursory language in whatever area you're going as a little goes a long way. Figure out the train system wherever you're going. Tbh it's pretty easy

[Anonymous No.13387488]

>>13387388
>shitty hostels
Perhaps I'm just a mawkish faggot but if I went backpacking I would want to sleep in a tent, not skip around from hostel to hostel.

[Anonymous No.13387500]

Y’all bitches need to lift weights

[Anonymous No.13387506]

>>13387448
>Pacific Crest Trail
>having a preset travel route that has already been scoured and explored by millions of people, laden with normie tourists and outposts
>not setting your own route and letting the terra become incognita.
Now I know what people mean when they say tourist locations and natural reserves are just another part of the system, not a genuine escape from it

[Anonymous No.13387530]

>>13387417
Funny you should say that, I haven't watched any anime for the past six months, excluding a few amvs and one clip compilation.

>>13387455
/lit/ trashes anything that's not literature.

[Anonymous No.13387567]

>>13384206
Today, ran 6.4km in under 30 minutes for the first time since I've started exercising again. Crossing the line realising I'd done it in 28 minutes was dope, not going to lie.

[Anonymous No.13387574]

>>13386736
You can't, just be happy if you got to experience even a little of that. I sure am happy that I had a bit of that in my youth

[Anonymous No.13387764]

>>13384206
Last year, thunderstorm erupted just as I was crossing through a mile-long pedestrian bridge across a lake with nothing on me

[Anonymous No.13387963]

>>13387488
You would regret it after 3 days. Aside from your body steadily becoming very cramped and uncomfortable after successive nights sleeping on the ground, if it rains for more than one day consecutively you'll probably get sick from the damp which is bad for exploring. Could probably be done if you prepared really well, but for the average person it's a bad idea, I tried it just backpacking across my local province

[Anonymous No.13387972]

Last night when I drew for 6+ hours, everything else sucks

[Anonymous No.13387975]

>>13387530
>/lit/ trashes anything that's not literature.
most people freak out about anime threads here, but in off topic threads like this useless blogging one people are mysteriously silent for 50, 100, 300 posts. /lit/ trashes what they think makes them look cool

[Anonymous No.13388031]

>>13387448
It'll cost him almost £1k just to fucking fly there. And how long will 2k last?

[Anonymous No.13388138]

>>13388031
if you plan a couple of months ahead, London to LA return is about £300
pic related, flying out 1 October

[Anonymous No.13389011]

>>13385002
based and bicyclepilled

[Anonymous No.13389123]

A tiny green bug the size of a Capital letter on this site flew in through the window of the library and hovered over my arm and stared at me for a good 20 seconds only slightly moving in a consistent distance to my head still above my arm though at my exact eye level; he flew out that same window again.
I felt like a giant to which a tiny green glow had risen curious to what I am.
I felt alive today.

[Anonymous No.13389216]

>>13384206
few weeks ago
>illegal techno party in Paris suburbs
>party is next to a roma gipsy camp
>gipsy children skeaking and dancing and doing stupid things with us until 4.am.
>music is good, some guy give me poppers, i didn't took harder drugs
>one DJ is my sex friend and after a weird vaudeville I took her from the arms of a white rasta and came back for 2 days of sex and chill

Since then it's complicated

[Anonymous No.13389667]

>>13386759
do you have any more videos like this

[Anonymous No.13389689]

>>13389123
>this constitutes feeling alive to someone

What a pathetic existence, truly

[Anonymous No.13389697]

>>13384206
standing over a sheer 800ft cliff last month.

[Anonymous No.13389780]

>week ago
>ride bike aimlessly through peaceful suburbs and slalom down steep hills in gorgeous weather

[Anonymous No.13389810]

>>13384206
>When was the last time you actually felt alive?
2 weeks ago i took LSD with some friends of mine in their apartment. I was crazy, i felt so relieved afterwards, its hard to put in words. I laughed out loudly, i cried heavily and i felt like i was a part of a bigger consciousness. It even cured my fear of death, i realised, though everything is fragile, death isn´t scary, there is nothing to fear.

[Anonymous No.13389817]

>>13384286
1pBp, as usual.

[Anonymous No.13390018]

>>13387288
>>13387421
>>13387300
Where is the most /lit/ place to travel to?

[Anonymous No.13390251]

i just fixed my car and quit my job, next week im moving all of my belongings back to my hometown after living with my friend in a different city for 3 years, and very shortly im starting a solo road trip in which i visit most of my friends around the country and hopefully find somewhere better to live

im 21 (22 in 7 days) and i have $16k saved up

idk how this will go

[Anonymous No.13390274]

>>13387333
based

[Anonymous No.13390289]

Planning on cycling 350km to my summerhouse with my mate. Decided to do it like 2 days ago. Hopefully I'll feel alive then.

[Anonymous No.13390922]

>>13390018
I'd personally vouch for Prague

[Anonymous No.13390963]

>>13384206
was part of a sweat lodge ceremony once and started crying for no reason. went to a 10 day meditation retreat. won a wrestling match in high school. got a MOAB in MW3. i'm boring.

[Anonymous No.13391158]

>>13389689
i felt pretty alive just reading your post desu

[Anonymous No.13391161]

>>13389689
cringe

[Anonymous No.13391170]

>>13386667

Please elaborate. I want to write a short story on this

[Anonymous No.13391175]

My girlfriend at the time and I drove out of the city once just for shits and giggles. We ran into a small town with a harvest art festival going on. It was wonderful. Music and vendors and food. All the little shops around the town. We ate at a fancy little place on the river. It felt like a hallmark movie.

I’m so cripplingly lonely these days. I’m paranoid at the world and project my insecurities on raging against the machine. I wish I could just be okay with myself and okay with the way the world is but it’ll never happen.

[Anonymous No.13391184]

Probably last Thursday when I was slapping and hitting a girl over her ass while I bent her over a sink as she called me daddy and came on my cock. It unirpnically felt very fulfilling to be there at that moment and I wish I could have it back, but part of me knows I can’t put on a show forever. I’ll always be a sentimental actor

[Anonymous No.13391249]

>>13391184
Indio?

[Anonymous No.13391262]

>>13384206
The last time I saw her smile. A genuine cute smile as she leaned her head away in shyness.

[Anonymous No.13391446]

Windows all the way down, going 105mph at 3:00A.M., yelling at the top of my lungs, not out of enjoyment but rage which evolved into passion. I've always been a reserved and quiet person, so finally allowing myself to just be furious was something else. Pretty interesting how giving yourself the freedom to do what you truly desire makes you feel alive.

[Anonymous No.13391507]

>>13384206
walking around in a quiet area during the winter like your pic related is the comfiest thing on earth. i love it.

i highly recommend cold showers to start your day. cold showers and yoga have changed my life and have given me clarity like never before. you just gotta find what makes you feel "alive" and live accordingly. it's different for everyone.

[Anonymous No.13391515]

>>13384206
>>13386603
70s-early 2000s was peak childhood in America and Europe. Just late enough to have cool shit like CDs, old TVs + VHS, access to weed, etc (as well, obviously as cars, not needing to work, fairly comfortable homes, etc), but before 9/11 (if before 2001) and all of the population displacement, disgusting degeneracy, white death, social media, internet, smartphones, etc and other dehumanizing bullshit that came after. Some top-tier art for this feel is Arcade Fire, Sufjan Stevens, picrelated, Bridge to Terabithia, Where the Wild Things Are (the movie).

I was just lucky enough to see the end of this period. My parents (French dad, American mom) told me about how it was before me, too. In France teens would have beers on their lunchbreaks, read literature and smoke cigs in the countryside, under bridges, and have these little groups of guys and girls that would all hang out together all the time, just walking from one house to another. American mom described much of the same. And it was so fucking easy for them to do that without being stressed for the future. They both just went off to college, studied interesting things without having propaganda forced on them, and at home we have pretty much all important French and English lit. Both got great jobs right after (undergrad) graduation too. I've shown me some pics and honestly it makes my heart ache, what beautiful things we have lost.

I'm a 1997 kid, so my childhood was early 2000s and adolescence 2010s. I do remember a time before smart phones. Biking around with friends. Spending hours together just fucking around, saying whatever we wanted, no bullshit. Then everything changed, sometime in the early 2010s and things just got gradually more and more depressing and pessimistic. Plus my whole area was essentially ethnically replaced, no cap. I had a longterm girlfriend whom I truly loved and with whom I lost my virginity -- afraid that I may be the last of a dying breed, seeing how fucked up and pretty much incapable of love youth younger than me are.

There were many many depressing moments throughout this whole thing. I remember once my mom set me up on this weekly playdate type deal with some Indian kid. This was a guy who was considered a loser at school and pretty much was a loser. His parents were annoying and unbearable and he was a single child in a 'diverse' neighborhood were nobody knew their neighbors or cared about them. So i think he spent all his childhood alone. I was probably the first kid who had ever been to his house to play with him. Keep in mind we were like 11 or 12. I remember him saying to me, clearly influenced by western media, that we would just be regular friends and would walk into each other's houses and hang out over the summer and bike around and explore cool things in the town together. After a few weeks I for some reason just stopped going there, though we continued at the same school.

[Anonymous No.13391539]

>>13391515
Can't forget seeing him sit by himself apart from even all of the other nerds (most were also indian and even they didn't like him) after I had already managed to finally find my own friends.

Of course I'm pro-European and just want our own fucking place for us to live and for our kids to grow together and be friends, but I can't help but feel how fucked up America is for everyone. I just can't wrap my head around how anybody could possibly want this, or look at the youth and the atmosphere of this country and think 'this, now this is how i'd like life to be'. i prefer to believe that it's all a big dumb boomer mistake and there's no secret hand pushing us towards an utterly dehumanized, WALL-E future.

Arcade Fire is the absolute GOAT for the transition period (late 2000s, early 2010s). Especially their old, unreleased stuff. Look up Cars & Telephones, Cold Wings, and Woodlands National Anthem. I also like some of Coldplay's early songs. We Never Change, A Rush of Blood to the Head, etc.

I want to get out of this country, but I don't know where to go. I'd like children, but I don't know how I would raise them so they wouldn't end up like anybody else. I don't want to be alone anymore. I'd like to have my own friends, and to be in love with my wife, and to have children that themselves have friends and grow up happy and in peace. I'd like to live somewhere where it snows, like my ancestors did. I don't know. I hope that everything works out okay

[Anonymous No.13391618]

>>13391515
>>13391539

I was born in 1993, in Sweden before it became the hellscape it is today. My childhood was amazing. We'd go out on our bikes and just ride till we got somewhere. Then we'd hang out there, or build a track for our bmx's and ride it. We'd explore old bomb shelters in order to try to find treasure. It was like an early Speilberg movie.

[Anonymous No.13391701]

>>13391539
another experience i had, i was working as a tutor at my college, working with local high school kids. i was put with one white girl, a HS freshman, who had had a lot of bullshit in her life. father died when she was younger, mother was unemployed and had to live with the father's family; she was also a single child who had moved from one place to another all her life and never had any friends. she also had to grow up in late 2010s america, so that alone was a bullshit hand. her grandmother had reached out to the program because she was failing literally all of her classes and was at risk of being expelled. i was concerned before i started working with her because of everything that they had said to me - she had issues, uncooperative, even possibly a learning disability... just all of that stuff. i went in expecting the worst.

worked with her for about a year, helped her go back up to all As, she started scoring in the top of her class on her exams, even scored in the 97th or so percentile on the PSAT. clearly an intelligent and goodhearted young woman, totally fucked over by the present degeneration and decay. i had to leave and haven't heard anything since. hope that her and her family are doing okay

[Anonymous No.13391707]

>>13384206
>be me in 2005
>8 years old
>last year before I became a weird kid
>social media cancer and smartphones didn't exist
>people actually went outside
I want to go back bros, my Gameboy SP and ps2 don't even work anymore

[Anonymous No.13391729]

>>13391515
Childhood living in the Philippines was aight. Anything post-2013 was terrible though because of educational reform.

[Anonymous No.13392993]

>>13390251
>Having friends

[Anonymous No.13393207]

>last winter
>brutal Arctic blast hits the city
>40 below
>some small part of me wants to go outside
>put on long johns, pajama pants, jeans
>thermal, t-shirt, sweatshirt, peacoat
>two pairs of socks
>gloves, mittens, scarf, beanie, cap with earflaps
>take off glasses so they don't fog up and freeze over

>walk outside
>immediately blinded by the sun as it reflects off the sheet of new-fallen snow
>cloudless sky, the sun little more than decoration
>take deep lungfuls of the impossibly cold air as I walk down the block
>not a car on the road
>not a person on the streets other than me
>not even a single gust of wind
>I've never heard the city this quiet

I've never experienced anything like it. Simultaneously surreal, sublime, and entirely humbling

[Anonymous No.13393294]

>live close to an old railway
>trains pass by rarely, maybe once or twice a year. Old industrial trains, the ones that don't go so fast
>at one point there's a small hill over which the rail tracks go over, and there's a passage underneath them so that when you stand there the tracks and nothing else are right above you.
>always dreamed of standing there one day as a train passes by directly above me
>eventually move out and forget about my old place
>over the years some foreign investors decide on building hotels near that spot, the town decides to move the tracks elsewhere.
>passing by one day through my old neighborhood with a few mates.
>construction of said hotels has been going on for a few months now
>suddenly see a train in the distance
>immediately drop the conversation and start sprinting towards the spot which was maybe around 600 metres away
>the train is faster than me and I am getting tired but somehow I managed to arrive just in time so that the last 2 wagons of the train drive directly over me
that was the last train that ever went there. It felt really nice to know that I barely made it

[Anonymous No.13393306]

>>13390018
Wherever you actually want to be

[Anonymous No.13393314]

There's been times when I've enjoyed myself in the last couple years but every recent memory I can clearly remember some part of my mind being littered with self doubt and anxiousness. Anyway I must've been 15, with my childhood best friend who I hadn't seen in years. I'm staying with him at his families holiday home on the other side of the country. One day we get up early, grab our fishing rods and just spend the day exploring along the river and lagoons looking for different spots to fish. My anxiety was not there, I was just happy and felt like a kid again. Found a spot by this huge gully, dangerously high waves crashing against the rocks. Set up a little tent and just sat there, speaking about life with one of the few people that remembered me when I was just me. We caught a little shark that day. I don't even miss the friend much but I do miss that total innocence of just being a kid in the moment.

[Anonymous No.13393336]

>>13384286
Please don't tell me you spent your childhood playing computer games.

[Anonymous No.13393342]

>>13384206
When I bought heroin and then snorted it

[Anonymous No.13393403]

>>13391515
>I'm a 1997 kid, so my childhood was early 2000s and adolescence 2010s. I do remember a time before smart phones. Biking around with friends. Spending hours together just fucking around, saying whatever we wanted, no bullshit. Then everything changed, sometime in the early 2010s and things just got gradually more and more depressing and pessimistic. Plus my whole area was essentially ethnically replaced, no cap. I had a longterm girlfriend whom I truly loved and with whom I lost my virginity -- afraid that I may be the last of a dying breed, seeing how fucked up and pretty much incapable of love youth younger than me are.
I was born the same exact year and had a very similar childhood minus the loving girlfriend bit. I lost my virginity to a fat girl (simply thick in the pics she sent) through the Whisper app right after I finished highschool.
But yes we rode our bikes around, caught lizards, LARPed as superheros, I remember picking a streetfight with the wrong kid and getting my ass kicked and crying in front of my friends, a true learning experience.
I think however poor kids can still have a good childhood while middle and upperclass are fucked and will likely become suicidal drug addicts. I'm very grateful to have grown up as trailer trash.

[Anonymous No.13394134]

Anyone saying everything has been ruined for today's kids probably doesn't spend much time around the zoomer generation IRL. Don't get me wrong, things are undoubtedly worse than before, but childhood is always able to transcend the society it's placed in. The kids I volunteer with are between 11 and 17 and plenty of them hate social media and don't spend much time on their phones. I have no doubt there will be a semi-spiritual movement away from technology addiction once these kids get older and they see the effects on their peers of a lifetime of social media parasitism. Since from these kids' perspective, smartphones and social media have always been around, they don't share the same relationship we do where we feel obligated to "keep up" with technology since it's perceived as the logical "progress."

Just don't mourn for the disappearance of an authenticity that's still alive and well for plenty of kids. If anything, the threat they're facing will give a fresh importance to life outside the clutches of digital spectacle. The kids are alright. A lot of them are better than us.

[Anonymous No.13394438]

>>13391515

This is the dumbest shit I have read all year, congratulations.

Assuming your parents had you age 25, they were born in '72 and were kids during the the Cold War. They were literally alive when Vietnam was going on. People thought they would die in a nuclear holocaust, for real. The Cuban Missile Crisis was still recent news for fuck's sake. Never mind the Middle East being in near perpetual warfare.

They were in their late teens and early twenties with Operation Just Cause, Desert Shield/Desert Storm, the Balkans wars and genocides, Mogadishu, and the tail end of the cold war.

You were born three years before the USS Cole and four years before 9/11.

How can you be this dumb?

>population displacement, disgusting degeneracy, white death,

Oh, wait, you're a /pol/tard. Of course you're this dumb.
>

[Anonymous No.13394497]

I can tell you about the last time I felt at peace:

>14 years old
>doing a small cruise with my family
>on the way back we stay 4 days at the sea
>spend them in my cabin, alternating between reading while hearing music and sleeping
>didn't even knew what time of the day it was
>didn't even care to know
It helps how I always liked staying away from my family, the sea, boats and the impersonal ambiance of hotels/cruises/etc..

[Anonymous No.13394520]

>>13391184
...BETH?

[Anonymous No.13394544]

>>13384206
Only time I feel alive is when I get away from it all. When I walk to my dorm from classes and decide to go on a 3 hour walk on the side of the road instead. When I'm by myself and yet in public

[Anonymous No.13394560]

>>13386759
This video peels me and leaves rawness behind. It hurts, like witnessing a beautiful sunset that will soon be over.

[Anonymous No.13394595]

>>13391515
Kill yourself normie

[Anonymous No.13394612]

>>13394595
>Kill yourself
normies don't do that. only blackpilled channers like you and me do that

[Anonymous No.13394652]

>>13386755
fuck off

[Anonymous No.13394661]

>>13389689
now imagine how a child must feel
they're brimming with life

[Anonymous No.13394678]

>>13387500
Nigga is 50kgs advising people to go lift

[Anonymous No.13394702]

>>13391175
I feel you....

[Anonymous No.13394884]

>>13394438
>People thought they would die in a nuclear holocaust, for real.

lol

>The Cuban Missile Crisis was still recent news for fuck's sake

Who cares? Lmao nobody thought we were actually going to be nuked from fucking Cuba. Nice job repeating all of historical buzz words you just learned in your AP history class. Just go somewhere else. Preferably reddit. i think you'd feel right at home there.

>>13394595
this is /lit/, not r9k or braincels. most of us are depressed normies

[Anonymous No.13395088]

>>13391539
I hope you accomplish great things.

[Anonymous No.13395232]

Really drunk. Made myself walk until my legs gave way. Suffering and euphoria are thw only way to feel alive desu

[Anonymous No.13395437]

>Yesterday
>Drive on the Freeway
>Synthwave
>Windows down
>Taco Bell
>Tell the guy at the drive thru he's "based and redpilled" for working late
>Fake ID
>2:59 AM four loko purchase
>Cloudrap videos on YouTube
>Twitter shitposting
>Wilful embrace of cringe like in that Lars von Trier movie
>Walk at daybreak to the gas station
>Airpods and vape
>2 big cans of Monster Energy
>Slap yourself sober
>Go to work

[Anonymous No.13395830]

>>13393207
It's crazy how quiet snow makes everything, Frost was spot on with "the only other sounds the sweep // of easy wind and downy flake"

[Anonymous No.13396614]

>>13394884

lol k

[Anonymous No.13396732]

>>13391618
What makes contemporary Sweden a hellscape?

[Anonymous No.13396890]

I used to drive down to the beach at night with a friend I had, Jen. I'd open my car doors and play an indie singer-songwriter she showed me that we loved and we'd lay on the grass in the park and look at the ocean and the moon and the stars and talk and drink beer and smoke cigarettes and weed and we'd stay out there for hours.

I was too fucking retarded at the time to realize how much she liked me. Or maybe I was just scared. But she's gone now and I burned the bridge like the fucking idiot I am, and now I haven't seen her in three years.

[Anonymous No.13396985]

never

[Anonymous No.13397004]

>>13384286

It's not something one can put in prose, nor convey to the dead except when imposing an instant sense of selection for quality during the course of a routine errand: An alarming magic, faintly ridiculous, simultaneously impossible and familiar, suffused with strange levity and surprising turns, a thinking animal passing through a labyrinth of lumbering machinery like an eel of sun inside a green halo. You remember missing that feeling he relentlessly projects to make all things speak as if they had personality. And then you forget when the chorus of the dead repeats that it's too peculiar to be important, or is any case not necessary. "Blessed", as they say, which is too fortunate for intentions to have any say in the matter. Or to accomplish something so easily it seems like something that happens to you, not something you do, rather as an infant assimilates the makings of lore directly from natural patterns, and sooner than usual resembles a polymath egg, or person. An unattainable much too much.

[Anonymous No.13397026]

It's become cliche at this point but I truly felt at peace with the world and my own existence the first time I took acid about a year ago. I no longer felt as though I had any expectations to live up to or any reason to concern myself with this finite existence. Instead, I become infatuated with this idea of a deterministic universe, whereby I exist purely to reinforce my own continued intellectual expansion. There is no collective or unifying experience in which each person is contained; rather, existence is mine alone. I'm alone in this universe, alone in this conscience of mine, and although perhaps this seems bleak to some, I found it rather comforting. No longer do I worry about impressing others or grounding my existence. Existence may be finite or infinite but I shall experience it on my own.

[Anonymous No.13397060]

>>13397004
>It's not something one can put in prose
>Proceeds to explain it in shitty prose

Never change, /lit/.

[Anonymous No.13397139]

>>13397060
>too dead to tell the difference between the modes, and between mode and form.

I trust Shelley, not /lit/.

[Anonymous No.13397141]

>>13397060
>shitty prose
You're being too kind. It's unreadable prose

[Anonymous No.13397171]

>>13397004
>An alarming magic, faintly ridiculous, simultaneously impossible and familiar, suffused with strange levity and surprising turns, a thinking animal passing through a labyrinth of lumbering machinery like an eel of sun inside a green halo

[Anonymous No.13397179]

>>13394438
Are you nonwhite or just low T?

[Anonymous No.13397360]

>>13397139
Nigger, I'd rather fail to make that distinction than write outdated, overwrought nonsense like you.

[Anonymous No.13398351]

bum

[Anonymous No.13398356]

>>13384206
https://discord.gg/sJpcEqV

[Anonymous No.13398439]

>>13384206
Sailing westward in a Cadillac with my now ex girlfriend, the possibilities seemed endless. We made it as far as the national forest east of denver before heading back east. The open road felt like endless opportunity we went to Roswell, Denver, Houston, New Orleans, made memories and lived laughed, loved and fought. I truly felt the spirit of life then but now everything seems hopeless. I miss her so much. Jett please come back

[Anonymous No.13398459]

>>13398439
West of denver* starting from Alabama

[Anonymous No.13398462]

>>13384206
Probably the last time I spent the night awake in anguish and inexhaustible rumination, only to get out at dawn, walk in the daylight and feel united with creation for half an hour.
It's very fun how the brain plays tricks on us. Refuses to sleep for eight hours straight, feeds you despair scenario all the way through, then gives you one moment of incredible, unexpected relief at the end. I mean I just wanted to sleep but okay I'll have the short-lived epiphany.

[Anonymous No.13398498]

>>13386571
I now see that burgerpunk can never die

[Anonymous No.13398501]

>>13386603
Books with this feel?

[Anonymous No.13398526]

>>13389810
That's great to hear. How much did you take, anon? Was it your first time?

[Anonymous No.13398699]

>>13398501
On the Road

[Anonymous No.13398784]

>>13386603
Sounds a lot lamer than the fun I had playing League and mmorpgs

[Anonymous No.13398939]

>>13397179

>>13391515

Are you retarded?

This poster is the most obvious narcissist I have seen in a long time.

> 70s-early 2000s was peak childhood in America and Europe.

>I'm a 1997 kid, so my childhood was early 2000s and adolescence 2010s

He literally does not know what he is talking about. He did not exist in the time period he glorifies.

>In France teens would have beers on their lunchbreaks, read literature and smoke cigs in the countryside, under bridges, and have these little groups of guys and girls that would all hang out together all the time, just walking from one house to another. American mom described much of the same.

Secondhand stories, editorialized by time. Note how close to this is in something you'd see on TV or on Netflix or in middlebrow print describing the "better past". It's an internalised version of an ideal past OP never experienced but which forms his self image.

OP loves the aesthetic but mentions nothing concrete, nothing real. He helpfully supplies a soundtrack and videography for mood setting:

> Some top-tier art for this feel is Arcade Fire, Sufjan Stevens, picrelated, Bridge to Terabithia, Where the Wild Things Are (the movie).

>Arcade Fire is the absolute GOAT for the transition period (late 2000s, early 2010s). Especially their old, unreleased stuff. Look up Cars & Telephones, Cold Wings, and Woodlands National Anthem. I also like some of Coldplay's early songs. We Never Change, A Rush of Blood to the Head, etc.

OP is inviting us to see this time as a movie in which he is one of the stars. Why is life not like this any more?

> all of the population displacement, disgusting degeneracy, white death, social media, internet, smartphones, etc and other dehumanizing bullshit that came after.

>Plus my whole area was essentially ethnically replaced, no cap.

= the Other did it, technology did it, /pol/ was right!

The tragic yet hilarious part is here:

I remember him saying to me, clearly influenced by western media, that we would just be regular friends and would walk into each other's houses and hang out over the summer and bike around and explore cool things in the town together.

OP is excluding the Indian kid (=the other) from his aesthetic vision. Naturally the people you blame for the world changing are brainwashed by media, but OP, well, OP is the main character in this movie so he legitimately gets to inherit

>Biking around with friends. Spending hours together just fucking around

It's memorable to OP because it's a threat to OP's self image and starring role in his episodes of Stranger Things. How dare someone else try to join the movie when the actors have already been cast?

and again an ego injury at something "missing":

> They both just went off to college, studied interesting things without having propaganda forced on them

Don't challenge me, don't challenge my identity, give give give.

This is a trainwreck.

[Anonymous No.13399072]

>>13398501
The Savage Detectives and >>13398699

[Anonymous No.13399086]

>ITT; people talking about their childhood with the complete ignorance of children

[Anonymous No.13399189]

>>13384206
a girl said 'i love you' to me the other day

[Anonymous No.13399323]

>>13398439
why she leave

[Anonymous No.13399568]

>>13384206
I mean I usually feel pretty good, at least I'm not depressed and don't have any existential concerns anymore, but I do get stressed by some practical hurdles in my life here and there. The most alive I feel is when I get really into math and I find a new theorem or understand some deep connection. I also had a great experience liek a year ago. I made a thread about it on here actually. I had been really depressed for awhile and had a lot of really shitty stuff going on in my life, so I dripped everything and spent about two months traveling across the US by myself on various planes, trains, and buses. It was a great experience and I ended up moving 3000 miles away. The only downside was that it cost a lot of money, and I'm by no means rich, but at that pint in my life it seemed that suicide or some crazy shit might be the only possible long term outcome with what I was experiencing.

[Anonymous No.13399589]

>>13387975
Incorrect, this board is not one person.

For the most part, most people on this board tend to thrash threads that try to pass ideologies with no common sense and people that try to push other mediums as literature such as manga.

No, manga isn't literature.

[Anonymous No.13399625]

>>13397026
Take the Platonist/pagan pill anon. You might find it goes down quite well. I think your voews are essentially correct, although much more can be said in the matter.

[Anonymous No.13399698]

>>13398784
Tell us about your time in mmorpgs

[Anonymous No.13399789]

I get that feeling often while playing music, if it's in a band, playing live or even just a really nice jam session. I've had jam sessions with total strangers and entered that flow state of mind where it feels like time stands still. Afterwards it's really easy to get to know them because you've already established a deeper connection with eachother, often with almost none words exchanged beforehand.

[Anonymous No.13399980]

>>13391515
18 y/o here, just graduated high school and I feel this really hard. I was super young when this era you're talking about ended but I remember it, biking to the drugstore to get sodas and candy and then eating it in the park, etc. Good times.

I definitely have a lot of the same concerns that you do about the next generation which is my generation I guess. High school was a shitshow, I felt super alienated because I didn't join any sports teams or related "normie" activities (NHS, DECA, etc). The issue is, at least at my high school, that people are so tuned into their own cliques and bubbles that they don't recognize anyone else's existence (I think a lot of this can be attributed to social media and the crazy identity narratives e.g. "I play soccer so I AM soccer" but that's beside the point). This makes it impossible to make new friends after like 8th grade who are different from you which only continues that cycle further. I would try to talk to someone new or someone who I wouldn't usually talk to and if I wasn't already in their little secret club then I had no chance.

Another issue is that these kids didn't ever want to do anything. Most of them just sit in the crib smoking weed and getting drunk, not really even having sex or partying but just escaping somehow. I do live in a pretty boring, upper-middle class suburb which might affect this though.

I'm just really grateful that I have a small and close circle of friends who really helped me get through all the bullshit of highschool. Going to uni next year so hopefully things will be better.

[Anonymous No.13400069]

>>13398939
>longtime
>reddit spacing
hehehehehehhehehehehhehehe

[Anonymous No.13400093]

>>13398526
>Was it your first time?
yes, it was my first time. i took a normal trip. i guess it was around 250 µg or something.

[Anonymous No.13400129]

>>13391175

What happened to her ?

[Anonymous No.13400354]

>>13384206
feel alive rn dude