Post and discuss the contribution of historical copy pastas to board culture

[Anonymous No.13181949]

Look who it is again, ID Heaven. I'm fed up with your shit faggot. The other day when you called me a newfag, yeah, haven't forgotten about that yet. Fuck you I've been on here for months and probably get on here more than you anyways. Don't you know that you make yourself look like a newfag when you call others newfag? Just because you learned how to hack your name and change it to "Heaven" does not give you the right to disrespect anyone at any time.

[R Æ V S S Q A N D V S !KNDYYIIins No.13181995]

Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes.

The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, report, or filter them.

About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They invent. They imagine. They heal. They explore. They create. They inspire. They push the 4Chan culture forward.

Maybe they have to be crazy.

How else can you stare at an empty text-box and type up a work of art? Or sit in silence and fabricate a new meme that nobody has seen before? Or elevate an inane discussion to sublime heights?

We provide a mirror for this kind of people. They gives us light.

While some see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the WWW, are the ones who do.

B e D i f f e r e n t .


– t. Anon

[R Æ V S S Q A N D V S !KNDYYIIins No.13182010]

A sophist, nominalist, atheist, materialist monist, nihilist, panmobilist professor was teaching a class on Heraclitus, known weeper.

“Before the class begins, you must momentarily accept that a new class is beginning every moment, and that once the class is over you will never be able to recall the same class (or infinite number of classes made up of an infinitude of moments, as it were) again.”

At this moment a brave Platonic, Aristotelian, Thomist who full understood that the problem of universals was the central problem of all metaphysics and philosophy and who knew that all modern philosophy was the misguided following of Ockham’s nominalism, stood up and said:

“Everything flows, panta rhei; is that right, professor?”

The amorphous professor smirked quite formlessly and ambiguously replied, “Yes, it’s been approximately 2500 years since Heraclitus established the doctrine that everything flows.”

“Wrong. If everything flows, as you say, then the statement "everything flows” also flows, making it as permanent or established as the proverbial river that was no doubt was made up of babby Heraclitus’ tears, probably because he knew that he would never be a true philosopher.“

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his copy of "Wild Ones ft. Sia” by Flo Rida . He stormed out of the room crying those nominalist tears. The same tears that are not the same tears when they leave the eye as when they hit the floor. There is no doubt that at this point our professor, Jacques Derrida, had contemplated the Forms instead of peddling ancient sophisms among a degenerate Academia. He wished so much that he had a self to kill, but he himself had argued that the self is nothing but a transitory event in the great flow of things!

The students applauded and all read the Republic and accepted that everything derives its existence from one universal Form, Αγαθών. The Apology was read several times, and Socrates himself showed up and acted as midwife for all the noble truths that the students’ souls were pregnant with.

Nothing became of the professor because according to his own logic he ceases to be by the end of this post.

Χαλάζι Πλάτωνα.

[Anonymous No.13182025]

>>13182010

lmao

[Anonymous No.13182030]

Follow your nose, philosophize with your nose! Wikipedia, The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, The Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy, The Beginners Guide comic series, The Giants of Philosophy narrated by Charlton Heston--things like that. They'll all give you the standard caricature, e.g., "Hegel is about the acorn becoming an oak", stuff like that... Then, smarmy, uptight, grad-students with no love in their hearts will kick you in crotch (and do it speaking perfect French) when you try to weigh in on the basis of that knowledge so you'll read each of three critiques from cover to cover carefully underlining everything that is important, you'll keep reading, reading it all, always the original book, always from cover to cover, and then when smarmy grad student comes to kick you down you'll just feel bad for them... They'll say something like, "Yeah, I wrote an essay about how I want to make out with Walter Benjamin." And you'll say something like, "Huh? You know my brother just got down slugging through the Arcades Project, have you ever read that one?" And they'll say, "Yeah, I think so..." Then, you'll think to yourself, 'geese, it took my brother several weeks to slug through that several hundred page collection of fragments and aphorisms, it's something I don't think he'll ever forget, and here this person is telling they're not even sure if they read it! Damn, I guess I won't even bother trying to dialog about On Language As Such and On the Language of Man, even though the profound insights contained in that essay illuminate the truths contained in the story of the fall in ways I haven't even begun to unpack, because this one I'm talking to now is no good.' Then, later, you'll be in New York City and you'll politely try to make conversation with someone standing there, and you'll ask them: "What do you do?" and they'll say "I work for an art collector" and you'll say "cool, what sorts of art are you into?" and they'll say "well, right now, I'm into garbage" and you'll think to yourself 'how many of these robots are there?'

[Anonymous No.13182033]

>>13182010
these pastas and the "x ain't free" spurdos kill my sides every damn time

[Anonymous No.13182939]

I saw Patrick Rothfuss at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

[Anonymous No.13182947]

>>13182010
This actually makes sense though

[Anonymous No.13183813]

>>13182939
>
lol