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/lit/ - Literature

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12995591 No.12995591[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

I'm 22 and I'm just embarking on my first serious relationship(I used to date girls before but I was too depressed to commit to anything serious) with a person a year older than me and much more experienced. Please give me book recommendations on the topic of relationships, and what can I do to act mature and responsible, and make it last.

>> No.12995600

I should add that we are both very nervous and insecure and we are starting to have problems because of that. We are also an extremely good fit for each other, she is into everything that I'm into, except for literature, but she seems really enthusiastic about it.

>> No.12995864

Nigga just stop thinking so much, jeez.

>> No.12996066

>>12995591
if you want do be mature and responsible, then stop acting like a manchild, asking for someone to spoonfeed you about how relationships work. you are in a idiosyncratic relationship and no charlatan will help you with the problems and peculiarities of it. do it on your own.

>> No.12996079

>>12996066
Don't be so cruel to young people

>> No.12996087

>>12996079
I'm not cruel, I just meant that depending on some big Other, who tells you how to run things is the epitome of immaturity and irresponsibility

>> No.12996103

>>12995591
>much more experienced.
Nice way to say a slag

>> No.12996125

>>12995591
It's all fine, you're still so young. Inexpierence hardly matters at your age. Articulate to yourself and your partner what you want from this relationship but other than that just have fun and enjoy yourselves. It gets vastly more serious in 5 years or so when the biological imperatives become the main topic of any heterosexual relationship, you need to be conscious about the fact that this now is lighthearted fun part, act like it.

>> No.12996129

>>12995591
12 Rules for Life

>> No.12996180

>>12996125
not him but i'm 22 too and i really appreciate you saying this anon. i get stressed out all the time about everything so it was heartening to hear someone speak forgivingly to us. thank you, my friend

>> No.12996500
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12996500

>>12995591
Don’t date a woman older than you, even by a year, now Fuck off OP WRONG BOARD WRONG SITE

>> No.12996559

>>12996500
>woman
He said person. That could mean man. It's rude to assume.

>> No.12996569

>>12995591
oh boy
nothing can be done

>> No.12996571

>>12996559
Faggots are gross.

>> No.12996604

>>12996571
Hetro people are absolutely disgusting but you don't see homos trying to besmirch you.

>> No.12996610

>>12996500
i agree with this if only for the game theory implications

>> No.12996638

>>12995591
Why would you create problems out of fear of having problems? Just realise you're inexperienced and take your time to learn step by step. Don't listen to others who say don't date older women, it's like saying don't hang out with older people. The outcome doesn't matter as you'll gain experience no matter, which I promise you will help you in the future.

>> No.12996714

>>12995591
go to /adv/

>> No.12996717

She'll probably cheat on you, don't worry, all women are whores my friend!

>> No.12996749

>>12996610
Actual game theory/mechanism design student here.
What implications?

>> No.12996821

>>12996079
>22
>young
This is your problem. You’re an adult

>> No.12997677

>>12996559
Faggots aren’t people

>> No.12997838

what does experience refer to here

>> No.12997908
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12997908

Basically in our current societal state you are both symbols. Symbols with the value of capital and *large* in your organs of consumption. When you are alone you are yourself, the value of you. When you are outside it you are the symbol. The person is too. A symbol of experience, she portrayed to you, yet it is only a symbol. Symbol are you? The body without organs, the castration by the mother, the father within everything. Evola and Marx. The state of grappling with this abstraction of reality.
Basically what im trying to say, is watch neon genesis evangelion

>> No.12997914

>>12995591
no longer human. it'll teach you how to succumb to addiction and drive your partners to kill themselves

>> No.12998098
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12998098

>>12996610
>>12996749

>> No.12998305

>>12996066
Fact is when it comes to social skills and propensity for romance, you have to develop it through experience. Books don't do shit. This is something that gets better with firsthand experience.

>> No.12998337

>>12997838
The experience of trying to understand that fat tongue commies babbling

>> No.12998346

just live and experience it for yourself.
no book will give you real experience for these sort of things. you got to live your life, make mistakes and learn from them.

>> No.12998405

>>12995591

This is all you need to watch:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p978u4r-q4c

>> No.12998638

>>12995591
never date a woman older than you ESPECIALLY if by "more experienced" you also mean "more mature." That's a recipe for failure. Men less mature than them are playthings to women. She will grow bored of you and grow to resent you.

>> No.13000412
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13000412

>>12995591
Be honest about who you are and what your life up until this point has been like. Lying is a waste of everyone's time, and trying to "impress" women will immediately out you as thirsty. Sincerity is your friend.

I unironically recommend some DFW. Flip through a few of his essays. But for the love of god, don't namedrop him on a date. It'll backfire.

>> No.13000488

The time for dialectics is over, now you must feel your way around.

>> No.13001226

>>12996500
>>12996610
>>12998638
I'm 19 and if I don't impregnate a woman at least 10 years older than me in the next 3, I will kill myself.

>> No.13001694

>>12997838
Shes been round the cock carousel and now wants to settle down with a 'nice guy' like OP

>> No.13001709

>>12995591
wow she's a whole YEAR older than you???? damn bro that's ancient!!!!!

>> No.13001799

>>12996604
That's only because mammals are disgusting. If only dinosaurs weren't wiped out...

>> No.13001827

>>12998638
That's just a general rule. However, if you are more like a cat to them, they can't grow bored.

>> No.13001846

Just be honest and respectful and hope that she will be too. These will probably prove to be surprisingly difficult things. The rest comes with experience.