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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/lit/ - Literature

File: 299 KB, 1080x1166, 1555624028076.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:40:51 2019 No.12957461 [Reply] [Original]

Write a passage of this mans odyssey

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:43:03 2019 No.12957471 >>12957461 for sale: plane seat, covered in shit

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:43:50 2019 No.12957473 File: 15 KB, 171x278, 1415998053816.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12957461

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:44:09 2019 No.12957475 >>12957461 Americanus, son of Burgerus, flew too close to the sun in the great metal ship. A timeless hero. His good deeds shall never be forgotten.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:46:31 2019 No.12957481 >>12957461 God is just

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:46:33 2019 No.12957482 "the Taiwanese had won the battle but they didnt win the war"

Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:47:46 2019 No.12957490

>Unable to fit inside the economy class bathroom, he was escorted to the business class one where he soon pressed the emergency assistance button, calling the flight attendant inside to pull his underwear down. The cabin crew for the flight was entirely female and the women were initially very reluctant, but the man insisted and pleaded, threatening to relieve himself on the floor, until he finally got his way.
>The flight attendant tried to use a blanket to cover the man’s exposed genitals, but that was slapped away. She put on a pair of surgical gloves and then pulled down his underwear. The man also insisted that the bathroom door be kept open, claiming that he wouldn’t be able to breathe otherwise. That request at least was denied.
>However, soon the man made his most unreasonable demand yet, calling on the flight attendant to come inside again and wipe his ass for him. Once again, the cabin crew initially refused, but the man threatened to stay in the bathroom for the entire flight, an act that would seriously inconvenience other passengers.
>Feeling as if she had no choice, the flight attendant put on three layers of surgical gloves and started wiping. As she did so, the man allegedly began moaning in pleasure and saying “deeper, deeper!” He then claimed that she hadn’t done a good enough job and made her wipe three more times before he was satisfied.

I didn't write this, this is actually what happened.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 00:57:08 2019 No.12957536 File: 18 KB, 320x400, 13249655_1717233348554742_2144396903_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12957490 Hello? Am I talking with the BASED & REDPILLED police? I'd like to report an incident

Anonymous Fri Apr 19 01:03:59 2019 No.12957564

>>12957461
>>12957490

Ling was a dignified woman. Having been born in the outskirts of mainland China, her family was without privlidge. She had been raised to work the farm with her older brother.
The first chance she had, she left for the city, persuing an education and work within the modern world. Now in her early twenties, she was a beautiful girl of dainty stature. Many a man within the city had persued her. But she sought more than to be just someones trophy wife.
For today she begins her new job. A well respected one, and much sought after amongst her peers, one that would open the world up with limitless travel to all the most exotic lands.
She brushed back a tear from her eye as she recalled the toil and slop of the farm. No more. She adjusted the satin kerchief around her neck, checked the pristine fold of her uniform. She must look dignified.
For today she began life anew. Today she had finally become a flight attendant.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 01:05:38 2019 No.12957570 >>12957490 This reads like a short story from an edgy author.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 01:06:36 2019 No.12957575 >>12957490 Now, imagine the fat guy is Ignatius Reilly.

>>	The Nomad !N8Yn.I/WbM Fri Apr 19 01:50:39 2019 No.12957685 >>12957490 What the fuck Where’s MeToo when you need it

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 01:53:59 2019 No.12957697 >>12957490 Sounds like Chuck Palahniuk is working on a sequel to Guts.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 02:48:52 2019 No.12957888 >>12957575 Ignatius would be absolutely repulsed by the idea of contact with a woman of any kind, let alone the erotic kind.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 03:01:35 2019 No.12957921 File: 28 KB, 634x440, 8792270-6615261-image-m-17_1548074397631.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12957490 someone shoop in power eyes

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 04:57:41 2019 No.12958195 >>12957490 >ywn be this chad

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 05:04:15 2019 No.12958208 >>12958195 >chad Uh, you don't understand the concept of chad, young friend.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 05:22:10 2019 No.12958251 >>12958208 it's not chad but it's certainly alpha

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 05:27:05 2019 No.12958264 >>12957490 We should seriously be allowed to kill anyone over 250 pounds

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 05:36:36 2019 No.12958284 >>12957490 Shit I just searched it it's fucking real >Afterward, the flight attendant wrote in an Instagram post that she locked herself inside the bathroom, crying and vomiting, unable to wash away the stench of the man’s shit.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 05:40:44 2019 No.12958304 File: 60 KB, 768x394, wipe-butt.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12958284 Utterly fucking based. The absolute mad lad. What a legend.

Anonymous Fri Apr 19 05:48:29 2019 No.12958329
File: 106 KB, 999x512, butt.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>12957490
>>12957570
Probably worth mentioning that this seems to be directly taken from the testimony of a woman trying to get compensation money and then written up by some sensationalist online hack. I can only assume our friend had read one of several earlier stories about spineless Taiwanese airline staff (e.g. the guy who wanted his urine bottle cleaned for him) and decided to mess with them. The exact sequence of events is hard to confirm though, given the sources in question.

Anonymous Fri Apr 19 05:49:04 2019 No.12958332

>Feeling as if she had no choice, one flight attendant put on three layers of surgical gloves and started wiping. As she did so, the man allegedly started moaning in pleasure and encouraging her, “deeper, deeper!”

I can fap to this.

It was later revealed that the man was actually a frequent Eva Air flyer, traveling with the airline 20 times in the past, with a history of questionable behavior. The airline confirmed that he had also requested flight attendants to wipe his butt during a flight from Taipei to Bangkok in May 2018, but that crew members had refused that request. On other flights, he asked flight attendants to “help clean his urine bottle,” a request which was acceded to “out of the spirit of service” and spilled soda and yogurt on himself during a meal which crew members helped to clean up.Eva Air denied rumors that he had once taken a dump at his seat

Absolutely savage.
ITS A MADHOUSE, A MADHOUSE.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 06:14:15 2019 No.12958392 >>12958332 Just imagine what he asked the Bangkok prostitutes to do on arrival

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 06:42:51 2019 No.12958470 >>12957461 Damn, I was looking forwards to Winds of Winter ;__;

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 07:01:44 2019 No.12958532 >>12957461 Do Americans really do this?

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 07:07:12 2019 No.12958551 D E E P E R E E P E R

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 07:16:03 2019 No.12958573 >>12958332 >Eva Air denied rumors that he had once taken a dump at his seat He 100% took a shit on his seat.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 07:18:40 2019 No.12958586 File: 1.27 MB, 1057x903, Black Canary throwing up.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12957461 Fucking Americans.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 07:22:35 2019 No.12958599 File: 2.29 MB, 1920x1080, CIA .png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12957461 >your a big guy

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 08:58:19 2019 No.12958900 >>12958392 scariest short story ever written

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 09:06:45 2019 No.12958936 High possibility they poisoned him

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 09:12:32 2019 No.12958964 File: 138 KB, 640x360, 1547975539_1a84.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12957490 WAGIE COME WIPE MY ASS

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 09:21:51 2019 No.12959005 File: 416 KB, 680x680, 1500160586450.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12957471 fpbp

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 09:51:51 2019 No.12959134 >>12958936 >Eva Air denied rumors of hiring a hitman

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 10:43:53 2019 No.12959381 The plane groaned and growled beneath them, like a constipated fat man straining to shit

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 11:16:41 2019 No.12959544 >>12958964 >the finger lifted in the air HAHAHAHAHAHA

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 11:19:10 2019 No.12959553 >>12957461 Lol, what a disgusting moron.

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 14:55:57 2019 No.12961062 >>12957490 lmfao

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 15:00:04 2019 No.12961096 >>12959544 USA NUMBAH FUGGIN ONE WHADDAFACK YOU KNOW ABAHDIT?

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 16:39:23 2019 No.12961962 File: 34 KB, 457x600, portrait-de-l-artiste-sous-les-traits-d-un-moqueur-1793.jpg_Large_480x.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>12958964 ABSOLUTE KING

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 16:50:36 2019 No.12962030 >>12957490 >mfw it's actually fucking real Based

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 16:56:49 2019 No.12962080 >>12957490 >Americans

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 16:58:25 2019 No.12962093 >>12959544 truly the modern Socrates

>>	Anonymous Fri Apr 19 17:08:27 2019 No.12962155 >>12962093 More like the modern Diogenes.

>>	Anonymous Sat Apr 20 01:38:43 2019 No.12967609 >>12957490 4chan user most likely

>>	Anonymous Sat Apr 20 08:03:37 2019 No.12969286 >>12958264 sometimes I unironically agree with this statement

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