/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.12832205]

I'm probably late to the meme or whatever but honestly, fuck this book and fuck Tao Lin. "Boo hoo I'm a degenerate hipster and I got degenerate hipster problems". Give me a fucking break. I can't believe I read the whole thing.

[Anonymous No.12832212]

>>12832205
he mentioned my favorite band of all-time in this book so he gets a pass from me

[Anonymous No.12832264]

>>12832205
He's a literary thief

[Anonymous No.12832268]

>>12832212
Who

[Anonymous No.12832274]

>>12832212
what band?

[Anonymous No.12832326]

To truly appreciate how Tao Lin changed Megan Boyle's vagina, one must appreciate the incredible endurance and stamina Lin brings to the bedroom. Where average males deliver a hundred to two hundred thrusts per copulation, Tao Lin exceeds 10,000 in around a half hour period. Megan Boyle's beef never had a chance. Her dainty veal slices were transformed by the hot crucible of Lin's locomotive hips pummeling and drubbing and smashing her beef until it grew as swollen and gnarled as a wrestler's ear. Lin must have marveled over time as he watched her beef blossom with each subsequent sexcapade until Megan was bashful about shorts and skirts and came to prefer yoga pants, which allowed her to tape and tuck her vajayjay jerky. Like an Earth boring machine grinding bedrock, Lin bored into Boyle to free her from herself, to give her the aesthetic charms of a wounded war veteran. Megan would grow to love her beef, to be proud of it. She liked that Tao had made the beef, that it was his muscular jackhammering that turned her bushy peach into a frizzy-headed split pomegranate

[Anonymous No.12832327]

What business is it of ours if he pinksocked Megan Boyle's snapper or if many of Tao's ex's report acquired IBS but refuse to blame Tao for fear of violating innumerable binding NDAs, ancillary legal agreements and findings? Tao's consumption of audience pussy is legendary, blighting statewide literary communities with ghosted one-night muses of Tao so beside themselves with yearning for his well-groomed hair and flouridated stare they cancel meetups and book clubs and close entire book shops or special library collections because they cannot bear to go on without Tao, without that characterstic calliope whistling from their billowing beef flaps or that gelatinous goo churned inside them by Tao's tumescence.

[Anonymous No.12832338]

>Tao Lin is a ramen and Adderall-fueled sexual engine incongruously jammed into the form of a Homo Sapien male. His multiply pierced penis has etched itself into the psyches of entire cohorts of MFA students and literary dirt legs, shearing away formerly steamy memories of homecoming kings, bathroom mounted heart-throbs and hot uncles the same as that whore du jour's vaginal epithelial layers are flayed by Tao's penile bulbs and rivets. A cybernetic appendage festooned with subdermal diodes that serve as coital mood indicators, Tao's swollen bell-end seems not just enlarged but exaggerated, as if religiously pumped by medical vacuums for many years, even before beholding the many gold and silver rings that encircle and jingle upon his glistening glans. Protected in a special leather holster, Tao's brandished bulges have long disrupted Brooklyn literary meetups, tilting the distributions of bespectacled snizz in a Tao-aligned angle. Their befuddled milquetoast boyfriends suddenly see only eachother and the dense throng of chattering women exuding, advertising fertility and health through every peal of laughter and gesticulation of calf or glute. The room high with the hopes of some lucky women's impending "pussy butchery," as many called it, Tao's polyamoric benders have been known to last for months and consume entire networks of previously equilibrated pairings. Attendant to this consumption was a scale of risk that drove several medical VIP groups to discharge the lucrative Tao from their clinics or else invite the ire of insurers and public health busy bodies. Tao's sexual consumption surpassed even the high end for New York City women, the 19 to 26-year olds, measured by the NYU Eli Heimerbaumheimer Sexual Institute as acquiring ten to twelve new sexual partners per week, depending on season and factors such as economic status. Tao clocked in thirty sexual partners during the five-day working week, prying and plowing through cooch and clam, punching through matted, unkempt pussy bushes the same as he slid into bald flapless slits, and as his numbers climbed, he inevitably collected some of the most far flung and mettlesome sexual microbiota, requiring the founding of a special trust to employ several dedicated pathologists to monitor and administer various bactericidal and fungicidal ointments and injections to keep Tao healthy in spite of the dankly diseased state of all the bunny and boipucci he was smashing.

[Anonymous No.12832380]

>>12832327
>>12832326

Did you read megan's book? I flipped through it the other day and I actually liked what I saw, it was all pretty vapid and dumb but in a very entertaining way. She seems like the kind of person I would like to chat up at a hipster party.

[Anonymous No.12832385]

>>12832380
I got a signed copy but haven't read it yet. I'm interested in her project fossilizing parlance and phrases that were unique to that time and place.

[Anonymous No.12832415]

That this book provoked such strong reactions says something good — as an example of what Jameson calls “the deadening of affect” and the effects of commodification on the human psyche, it’s valuable. More to the point, I think it’s actually a funny book