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/lit/ - Literature

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File: 44 KB, 344x510, beaton_008-774970.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1215384 No.1215384 [Reply] [Original]

You are now thinking about Kate Beaton having anal sex for the first time.

>> No.1215396

I am n ow think about Kate beatin my meat

>> No.1215407

She's not really that into it, only doing it because it's something new and you might like it. She does it for you. She's nervous and worries that her asshole smells even though she was careful to wash it closely (it does have a little bit of an odor--you don't tell her). She's awkward about positioning her asshole up in the air, shifting around and trying to hold her legs up (it makes her belly squish together; she worries you think she's fat). You pour some lube on your cock and around her hole. She starts to make a joke to cut the awkwardness. You poke a lubed up finger into her before she can say the punchline. She makes a nice like this: "Hoonrrffggh. Huhgnr." You laugh; she blushes. She starts the joke over again (she doesn't know what to do). Again you enter her before she can complete it, this time with your penis. It's like fucking a lubed-up hole in the drywall with a plastic bag filled with vaseline on the other side. You fuck Kate Beaton's ass.

>> No.1215420

man, no i'm not

>> No.1215424

Judith Shakespeare would have gotten so many creepy twitter messages

>> No.1215427

>>1215407
Holy shit wtf am i reading

>> No.1215431

what the fuck are you guys doing in here?

>> No.1215437
File: 86 KB, 500x333, Beaton.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1215437

>>1215407
I love you.

Can you do her trying to explain to me that she has needs too and that there are things she enjoys while I blatantly ignore her and fall asleep afterwards?

>> No.1215441
File: 16 KB, 376x265, kafelnikov_2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1215441

>Not particularly attractive.
>Her comics aren't even all that funny.
>She probably at least has a good personality.

>> No.1215443

I would hate to be an internet celebrity.

>> No.1215445

>>1215443
This, however, I would love to be Tao Lin

>> No.1215450

Internet celebrities it would be cool to be: Lowtax. Maddox.

>> No.1215455

>>1215450
You are now thinking about Kate Beaton having anal sex for the first time with Maddox.

>> No.1215460

>>1215455

So basically it starts the same, with her being awkward, and trying to make jokes. Then he grabs her hair, pushes her face down, and obliterates her pitiful virgin asshole, with crazed, erratic thrusting, and a cock that could be used as a leathal weapon.

During the act he will grow a magnificient, manly beard, seemingly at will.

>> No.1215465

>>1215460
And then he wakes up

>> No.1215468
File: 44 KB, 437x452, sharks.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1215468

I've had a crush on Kate Beaton for a year.

[spoilers]our love can never be[/spoilers]

>> No.1215481

Maddox should never have added videos. His voice is dullard.

>> No.1215533
File: 137 KB, 767x1023, kbeat.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1215533

BIRTHAN HIPS

>> No.1215537

Nah, I really don't feel like getting shit on my dick.

Beaton is /lit/'s Waifu, it seems

>> No.1215540

>>1215445
Get the fuck out, Tao. This thread is about Kate.

>> No.1215545

>>1215445
TAO LIN

>> No.1215580

>>1215545
Go away, we don't want you here.

>> No.1215636
File: 14 KB, 372x300, 2007_05_tao_lin.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1215636

>>1215445
I love you, Tao Lin.

>> No.1215688
File: 535 KB, 800x586, kate-beaton.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1215688

>> No.1215699

Does this mean I can derail any thread I don't like ssimply by mentioning Tao Lin. Epic.

>> No.1216196

i will marry kate beaton, mark my words

>> No.1216224

>>1215688
Lol worthy, I positively hate Atwood

>> No.1216235

I'd never heard of her so I had to do some research before I thought about it.

>> No.1217977

bump

>> No.1218056
File: 67 KB, 584x438, kate-beaton-pony.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1218056

do you fuck kate beaton's ass
Y/N

>> No.1218060

>>1218056

>take pony

>> No.1218196

>>1218060
>Pony GET
>Kate Beaton is slightly upset but forgives you as the pony is, after all, quite cute.

What now?
What now?

>> No.1218197

>>1218196

>ride pony

>> No.1218201

>>1218197
>You attempt to ride the PONY but accidentally crush it.
>Kate Beaton is upset.

What now?

>> No.1218203

>>1218201

>ride beaton

>> No.1218204

>>1218203
>in her ass

>> No.1218215

>>1218204
>>1218203
>You attempt to ride the BEATON. Do you use protection?
Y/N

>> No.1218217

>>1218215

N

>> No.1218235

>>1218217
the BEATON slaps you and runs away

FISSON MAILED

>> No.1218236

>>1218217
>You attempt to ride the BEATON without protection.
>You climb upon the BEATON's ass and urge her to walk.
>You ride the BEATON.

What now?

>> No.1218250

>>1218236

>take beaton to the racetrack

>> No.1218279

>>1218250
>You ride the BEATON to the biggest racetrack. A race is just about to start but there is an open position for an extra horse.

What now?

>> No.1218281

>>1218279

>enter beaton in the race

>> No.1218292

>>1218281
>You enter the BEATON in the race.
>Unfortunately, the BEATON is not a horse and comes last place.
>The BEATON is however extremely charming and attracts the attention of numerous high-profile audience members.
>The BEATON has won second prize in a beauty contest! Collect $10.

What now?

>> No.1218297

>>1218279

stop this shit. /lit/ is the only board I visit regularly without quest bullshit and I'd like to keep it that way.

Take your Beaton Quest to /co/. They'll love it.

>> No.1218300

>>1218292
>fuck beaton in the ass so hard she screams like a child

>> No.1218310

>>1218297
this is the best thread on /lit/ right now, you low-paid whore. Get the fuck back in Ulysses

>> No.1218325

>>1218297

>rub penis on the lips of anonymous

>> No.1218838

>>1216224
FOOL!

>> No.1218852

Thanks for the various pics, fellow anons. It's comforting to know that she's so normal looking/dressing/acting. I had had suspicions that the personality behind her comments was more of a personae.

I generally like Beaton's stuff. No real belly laughs of course, but it's archly twee and usually produces a knowing smirk. Perfect "New Yorker" cartoon fodder if you know what I mean.

>> No.1218856
File: 5 KB, 261x193, TyBrax12.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1218856

>chubby legs
no i'm not...

but oh she likes books! so do i! hardly any women like books so i will masturbate to this one like a fucking pig!

>> No.1218861

>>1215533

is that her boyfriend? seriously? I have a great chance!

>> No.1218869

>>1218856
hey tybrax your fat whast up?

>> No.1218889
File: 187 KB, 800x564, brontessm.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1218889

>> No.1218894
File: 4 KB, 240x159, TyBrax18.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1218894

>>1218869
nope someone on here saw me irl & says im not.

u mad?

>> No.1218900

>>1218869

*applause*

>> No.1218902

>>1218894
i asked you how it's going and you completely focus on the trivial fat calling part?? mayhaps it's you what is mad??

>> No.1218911 [DELETED] 
File: 3 KB, 99x135, TyBrax21.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1218911

>>1218902
maybe it you cooled down before posting you might be able to spell "what's" (up) correctly & I would have known what you were asking.

Please take 10 deep breaths before replying.

>> No.1218913
File: 24 KB, 550x300, TyBrax10.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1218913

>>1218902
maybe if you cooled down before posting you might be able to spell "what's" (up) correctly & I would have known what you were asking me.

Please take 10 deep breaths before replying.

>> No.1218915

>>1218913
nice doublepost. sorry for the missspelling im a bit sick today so what's up?

>> No.1218928

>>1218913

Brax you ridiculous bitch. You lolcow. You criticize him for a typo and then write "Maybe it you calm down"... and edit the post, correcting your own mistake. I actually do hope someone rapes you one day.

>> No.1218931

>>1218928
it's ok, she's insecure as hell so don't be too hard on her. just call her fat when you see her post and she will cool down on the shitposts a bit. good luck!

>> No.1218932

>>1218915
nothing much. i left lab early cos i was too scared to ask for help. then i skipped classes cos i dont want to walk in like a freak anymore.

spend the morning walking around some places on my train journey. Had a lunch in a quiet park with squirrels & birdies.

what about you?

>>1218928
>edit the post
>4chan
>edit
Your repressed rage is making you hallucinate bro, everybody calm the fuck down.

>> No.1218934

>>1218931

I've just... I've just hated her so much...for so long. I gotta go smoke.

>> No.1218940

>>1218932
sounds good. i've been staying at home mostly and eating fruit and soup for 3 days because i have a nasty cold and don't want to become sick. you shouldn't skip classes because of social insecurity because that will only make it worse (the insecurity part) hope this helps

>> No.1220115

(bump)

>> No.1220171
File: 8 KB, 299x276, Idisaprove.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1220171

The hell is going on in this thread.

>> No.1220180

>>1220171
srsly U guise.

Katie is the only girl who will talk to us(Tybrax is fugly so she doesnt count) quit scaring her away.

>> No.1220218

She's too chubby for my tastes and she dresses like she's 60.

Now that's a boner killer.