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/lit/ - Literature


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File: 66 KB, 340x632, galaxy_science_fiction_1952_1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12037422 No.12037422 [Reply] [Original]

Write what's on your mind.

>> No.12037432

women live in my head RENT FREE. i have never experienced such a love hate relationship, i absolutely despise them but at the same time, can one of you step on my face already? jesus christ, i'm going schizo if i don't lose my virginity by 30 (already 25)

>> No.12037495

>>12037422
Sometimes I wish I was an alien. I wonder what they're up to on their other planets.

>> No.12037621

>>12037495
We almost had alien life here. There was like six versions of the homo and we, the homo sapiens, are the only ones left. I wonder what shit would be like if there was six different evolutions like us.

>> No.12037626

How do people become more self-aware with their writing? I feel like authors here can recognise poor pacing and dialogue, but have no idea about how to improve it.

>> No.12037640

finna shid my pants homie

>> No.12037641
File: 508 KB, 565x989, 1532360153028.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12037641

>>12037432
jesus christ are you me

let this nightmare end already

>> No.12037647

>>12037641
yuck

>> No.12037688

>>12037641
friend, we will NEVER smell her feet scents. we will NEVER bury our face on that sole. if this isn't hell, designed the demiurge himself, then i don't know what can be worse. let's rejoice and cry, brother

>> No.12037753
File: 29 KB, 384x384, 1536466852966.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12037753

>>12037621
>There was like six versions of the homo

Yeah, and I bet they were all in your bed.

>> No.12037778

I'm bogged down in these two books that i just can't finish. I read and read for hours yet I can't make it past the first half of either.

>> No.12037792

This Bengali girl with AMAZING milkers I'm texting must become mine

>> No.12037794

>>12037422
nothing

>> No.12037795

>>12037753
Holy shit. You fucking got him.

>> No.12037824

>>12037422
bored, but aware that always distracting myself to not feel bored is pointless and just makes me a slave to my lack of free will, so i sit in boredom and also realise that is a result of my lack of will. wonder if being aware like this is a better life than being immersed in distraction, then realising i dont have a choice and now returning to the initial thought and numbness

>> No.12037827
File: 42 KB, 645x773, 1541260494.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12037827

Doing all the things we used to do together

>> No.12037963
File: 509 KB, 700x827, LF1IjMt.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12037963

I want to get into painting, I think. Impressionism. Any anons here paint?

>> No.12037970

>>12037621
>I wonder what shit would be like if there was six different evolutions like us.
im not going to say it but i am thinking it

>> No.12037999
File: 13 KB, 400x400, 1536128272871.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12037999

My foot fetishism is so strong that it is on par with my desire for normal intercourse, and my God, 18 years of my life have gone by and I don't think I haven't done as much as TOUCHING the foot of another female, I'm not even complaining about not having licked soles or sucked toes... I think I haven't touched the feet of any girl, and I yearn for it every so often and wonder how it feels like, I think that when the day comes and I lick a foot I'll instantly cum, without further input.

>> No.12038010

>>12037999
This is the weirdest fetish desu

>> No.12038012

>>12037970
We'd be way more distinct than different races are though. And the specieists would be a lot worse than you racists.

>> No.12038014

stau bissinda fru jilman

>> No.12038029

I think I lost some part of me when he died. It was years ago, but I can’t stop thinking about it. The last message I sent him, the last time we hung out. And then some stupid fucking cunt hits the breaks in the middle of an intersection and he’s dead. Hit by a semi. I was sixteen years old carrying my best friends casket. The worst fucking part is that they all moved on. Everyone eles just went off to collage, went around the world and I couldn’t do that. I don’t know why I can’t let go of the pain. I just self destruct. I’ve been to multiple psych wards and rehabs but nothing helps. I’m just some faggot who can’t get over something other people barely remember. I’m fucked up right now so I doubt any off that made sense. Fuck it

>> No.12038036
File: 10 KB, 380x272, 1518030045915.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038036

>>12038010
Why? It's one of the tamest. Feet are sexy as fuck desu, but, woe is me, I can only fantasize about the feet of my colleagues rubbing against my face in romanticized scenarios, still not achieving it in reality. Sometimes I'm scared that the real thing is not as good as my expectations or that it gets old after a while, but even then it'd still be better than masturbating to my imagination, in the corner of my badly-lit room.

>> No.12038040

>>12038036
dump your whole cat folder, now

>> No.12038062
File: 93 KB, 1280x720, 1519992309735.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038062

>>12038040
I too like the shaggy fur of these buddies, but alas, I don't have a cat folder, they were adopted from the Internet moments ago.

>> No.12038087

>>12038029
one of my friends died when we were nine, it was back in 2001, I forgot the date but saw it engraved on his gravestone a few months ago, I wasn't there for a long time, a period happens where I completely forget about him and then it hits me like a brick, he had some inborn health problems, wasn't supposed to make it past that age, there is a group picture where we are in the middle side by side, it's my favorite picture right now, I remember on the day I heard he died I couldn't make much sense out of it, I thought that was the case because I was too young, but years go by and things haven't changed much in that regard

>> No.12038096
File: 144 KB, 862x1024, 1541361239141.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038096

>>12038036
What city do you live in, anon? You can pretty easily get some college girl to let you play with her feet for $50. My first time was with some random girl for $25. After that I had a lot more motivation because I had experienced the real thing, but I also took it off a pedestal.

Just don't be afraid to shop around, and don't overpay. As another option, you can get a real prostitute for a somewhat high price, maybe $200, if you use a good escort review community and you live in a well-supplied city or you're lucky enough to be in a country with legal and well-maintained red light districts. That way, you get her for a full hour or more, and can experiment. But don't overpay and don't jump the gun and get some crackwhore. Also, don't do anything unprotected. If she will do it unprotected with you, she's done it with lots of men before you.

>> No.12038099

if im real, than how can you people be real???

>> No.12038111

>>12038036
>Feet are sexy as fuck desu
I just don't see it. Especially people who go on about the smell. And it's not like I don't get that part, myself having a thing for armpits.
Feet are just odd, fat, misshapen hands to me.

>> No.12038130

Being too self aware is never a good thing.

>> No.12038133

>>12038096
are you the mishimafag that keeps posting mishimathreads?

>> No.12038140

>>12037422
I'm terrified of 2019. Graduating college, friends moving on, still living at home unable to find a job because I never networked or made any friends whatsoever here...whatever that DFW quote from good old neon is, a universe in each of us and you can only see it through a keyhole, that's me trying to express this. And knowing other people are this way is also terrifying because you can't force the lock. Want to sublimate myself. Tired. Nothing to look forward to. Or maybe everything. Hard to know. I just hope my friends and parents will be okay.

>> No.12038142

>>12038133
No, but I approve of Mishima in general.

>> No.12038146

>>12038096
I'd rather have it happen "naturally" in a relationship (part of the romanticized scenarios I donate spermaroo to). I would consider paying for it if I was as far-gone as the thirty-year old virgins that post on this site, but although I'm a bit shy and prone to be embarrassed, I wouldn't really call myself an introvert. I'm not short of friends. I could visualize myself getting a girlfriend within 2019, I'm overall, dare I say it, optimistic.

>> No.12038148

My black "friend" is mad at me because I called him a fart nigga

Apparently whites are never allowed to say nigger, even with "friends," even ironically

Well I stand by what I said. If that makes me racist then so be it. The man is a fart nigga

>> No.12038151
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12038151

>>12038111
>Feet are just odd, fat, misshapen hands to me.

Sometimes I wish we had feet like monkeys. And tails.

>> No.12038153

Currently trying to think of something interesting or novel to post ITT

>> No.12038162

These threads are the only reason i come to /lit/

>> No.12038163

I wish I had a D&D group of people who take tabletop roleplaying pretty seriously and like to get really deep into lore and stories, and aren't redditors, normies, or women

>> No.12038171

im sad

>> No.12038175

>>12038163
Me too desu. But with the even further restriction that the campaign is more "relaxed" in the sense that it's not leading up to some apocalyptic battle of demigods

>> No.12038177

>>12038087
I’m sorry for your loss man, especially at that age. I still keep his prayer card from the funeral in my wallet. When shit like this happens there really is no way to make sense of it. I don’t think I’ll ever come to terms with it.

>> No.12038181

>>12038175
100% agreed. I want the setting to be lived-in and believable, so you can get lost in it and it keeps its sense of majesty. I don't want to show up and be the center of that little world within a month.

>> No.12038188
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12038188

>>12038111
>I just don't see it.
I get it, but you could apply this to literally every other fetish that you don't have, I don't see why specifically feet would be the weirdest.
>Feet are just odd, fat, misshapen hands to me.
Feet are peak female beauty for me. The pinnacle of human architecture. If I were to give an argument for intelligent design, it'd be the fact that feet exist.

>> No.12038191

>>12038177
I'll always miss my friend but I couldn't look myself in the mirror if I backed down

It's not about the word itself, it's about right or wrong

Michael, if you're reading this... you're a fart nigga. And you always will be

>> No.12038198

>>12038163
>>12038175
Is D&D fun? I never had anyone to play it with. I miss board games.

>> No.12038210
File: 4 KB, 223x226, 1531777298553.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038210

>>12038151
If one day all the feet in the planet changed to... this, all the light in my world would go out. I'd promptly hang myself in the garage with a toilet paper belt.

>> No.12038212

Tore my achilles really badly a while ago and it didn't heal properly, bunch of scar tissue etc
Anyway now I have a slight but permanent limp.
I've had it for a few months now but as I was walking home today in the cold, and I was just hobbling pathetically up this hill I finally realized that this is it now, I'm going to be limping my whole life. And it hurts, the cold air makes it ache. I've fucked it bros, take good care of your achilles tendons.

>> No.12038213

>>12038171

But why?

>>12038177

>I don't think I'll ever come to terms with it.
Why not? I've never experienced what either of you have, but it seems like it would be...certainly not easy, but possible, to reconcile what happened when you were young with your current life, knowing what you know now vs back then about life. I assume the weight of the experience weighing on you for years and years has a definite impact, and maybe the majority of the explanation lies there, but I'm still curious why you think you'll never come to terms with what happened.

>> No.12038219

>>12038130
Why?

>> No.12038222

I've been thinking a fair amount recently about how I'm too verbose.

In particular, when I'm trying to write colloquially - which is something which doesn't come naturally to me - I end up phrasing everything in a long, drawn out manner. I've always had this problem: even in irc chats years ago everyone would be chatting and I'd post something but I'd have so many built-in caveats for fear of being misunderstood, or it would be so circumlocutory than it would either end the conversation or everyone would ignore me.

I think I'm less periphrastic than I used to be but I still struggle with this issue a lot. Anyone else face this or any advice?

>> No.12038239
File: 365 KB, 500x275, 1541260512.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038239

>there's a fire in your eyes
>I see it all sometimes
>in the darkness of the night
>I see it many times
>yes, I'm sure it shines in you
>there's a brightness in your eyes
>I see it all tonight
>In the darkness of my light
>shining on the chosen few

>> No.12038240

>>12038222
The contrary happens to me. My native tongue is spanish, and I constantly hammer myself over how word-starved is my writing style in english. Far too many times I struggle with finding words for my thoughts. Although, I'm really satisfied with my style in spanish.

>> No.12038241
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12038241

>>12038210
c'mon anon, you wouldn't accept a handfootjob?

>> No.12038246

>>12038241
MAKE IT STOP ANON

>> No.12038247
File: 234 KB, 416x434, ugly.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038247

>>12038241
How about a foothandjob?

>> No.12038253

I hate women so much it's getting distracting. I don't really like my friends as much as I like the good times. I hang out with one of my friends because he's my only way to access women irl. I fantasize about how a potential relationship with one would fall apart.

>> No.12038256

>>12038253
Why do you hate women?

>> No.12038273

>>12038256
I usually get rejected by them. I'll try so hard to be appealing to them and it barely works out. I can think of like maybe 6 times it has. Plus I hate being talked down to or lectured by them. This makes me want to assault them.

>> No.12038276

>>12038273
then try a little softer

>> No.12038279
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12038279

>>12038276
Do you mean rape?

>> No.12038281

>>12038276
I'm thinking about going celibate or just beating women I encounter.

>> No.12038283

>>12038273
Try not to project your experiences onto all women. Also
>This makes me want to assault them
I know how irritating it is to deal with fools, but they're having control over you, I'd try to gain power of my reactions, desu.

>> No.12038290

>>12038240
I think your writing in English reads really easily, especially in this format. The unfortunate thing about my writing is that I can think of the right words to adequately articulate my thoughts, but only just such that the only way I can think of expressing them extemporaneously usually ends up being convoluted or really clunky.

I almost wish I had slightly less nuanced thoughts to articulate so that I write concisely enough to actually engage in casual conversations with other people.

>> No.12038309
File: 332 KB, 357x610, school.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038309

>>12037422

>> No.12038310

>>12038213
My wording was definitely not the best. You’re right it’s not easy coming back from a experience like that, but it is possible. I’ve been steadily working on fixing my life and now I can say I’m pretty happy where I’m at. Sometimes it hits me and I need to get it out.

>> No.12038317

>>12038309
school sucks

>> No.12038327

>>12038317
hell yeah dude

>> No.12038332

>>12038309
I wish I was back at school. Life was so much fucking easier back then, and I know it's easy to forget all the fucking social bullshit you had to go through, but it was literally like seven hours and a day and all the academic stuff was at such a baby-tier level you could literally just coast through it. Wish I read Gass when I was that young as well, but I never really started reading properly until I was older, which is dumb because I used to have so much more free time than I do now, because then I would have got so much of a head-start relative to where I'm at now. Fuck.

>>12038317
True, but not as much as adulthood, right?

>> No.12038335

I'm in my last year of university and I'm getting a bachelor in computer science. While I find system development a lot of fun and my grades are consistently good, I still have strong doubts as to what the fuck's gonna happen once I'm done.
Finishing university without getting a job sounds like a genuine nightmare and I really don't think I'll handle it. Doubts about myself and my degree keep swirling around in my head and imagining anything other than the worst case scenario seems almost impossible. I've read that most job interviews test your skills under pressure but if they tell me to do shit like inverting a binary tree on whiteboard then may whatever deity have mercy on my soul.
I live in Europe and there are so, so many job listings for system development and I genuinely do have confidence in my learning abilities and grades but fuck me, every day feels like a guillotine looming over my head and I've got another six months before I achieve ultimate failure.

>> No.12038340

>>12038335
>inverting a binary tree on whiteboard then may whatever deity have mercy on my soul.
I know this is a meme but you should be able to do this no matter how much pressure you're under

>> No.12038384

>>12038335
>test your skills under pressure

they ll just do some hr group dynamic and hire the hottest/most extrovert person in the room or the person who knows someone inside the company

>> No.12038387
File: 12 KB, 216x233, HssUWSE.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038387

I don't understand how some of you can justify things like meaning and morality without God. How could a universe that is not created (see: DELIBERATE) contain any meaning? It's not like you can simply project meaning onto the universe, because then you know it's simply fabricated. When people proclaim themselves 'nihilists' I can only interpret it as them gesticulating towards the abyss: it's more like an expression of pain rather than a real philosophical position. The only solution to this conundrum seems to be a Kierkegaardian leap of faith, yet many people on this board bemoan 'Christcucks' or any form of religious ideal at the mere mention of 'God'.

>> No.12038389

>>12038130
It can sure make you an autodestructive person if all you see is things wrong with you
>>12038212
Atleast get a cool cane dude.
>>12038290
Try reading stuff with a lot of lingo in it, lots of people saying fuck and shit and just not giving a damn, or just conversations between people like that, then try it out yourself without beating yourself up, that'd be a start i think

>> No.12038431

>>12038387
Well, meaning and morality don't actually exist, but they're human abstractions. Fabricated, yes.

Even if the christian God had created the universe, why should I care about what meaning he intended it to have? It would have the same validity as my fabricated meaning has.

>> No.12038441

>>12038290
I do agree that my writing is good for communicating simple ideas as I'm doing right now, but when I try to engage in any advanced and meaningful discussion, it's a royal pain on the ass.

>> No.12038464

>>12038389
I think that could be really useful advice, actually. The last book I read with that kind of writing style was Catcher in the Rye, and that was a considerable length of time ago now, so I'll try and find something fairly contemporary with a decent amount of dialogue in it, and hopefully that'll help.

>> No.12038500

>>12037422
maybe this month will be the month that I finally kill myself

>> No.12038515

>>12038213
>But why?

I have BP
Anxious about the future
Worried about a friend who is ignoring me (in this respect I am self-aware enough to know I am overreacting but still can't bring myself to stop feeling things so strongly)

>> No.12038531

>>12038500
How old are you?

>> No.12038543

i want to fucking believe but given the scope of the universe and the likelihood of life elsewhere, alongside the general idiocy of the human race and its wide variety of religious and spiritual beliefs, the ridiculously twisted chain of faulty translations and misconceptions throughout the centuries, along with living inside the bible belt itself (the most compelling argument for atheism) its next to impossible for any honest skeptic.

>> No.12038548

I'm depressed and completely lost in life. I fucked up by going to an a shitty university and I dont think I learned much and Im not even sure I want to follow through in that field. I wanted to study science instead but I pussied out and kind of just gave up on university half way turough so my GPA is shit. I hate where I live but I'm not sure where to move.
My life is plagued by indescision and I feel trapped despite the fact that I had a privileged upbringing. I feel like I'm getting dumber, I dont know if that's because of the depression or just being idle. I've been a NEET for 2.5 years now ever since graduating and I feel trapped. I think about this every day to the point that it just hurts to think about it now.

I'm thinking about trying to go somewhere nice to learn how to sail and fo that for a while. But on the other hand I feel like it's just going to he more wasted time that wont help me in the end.
Maybe I should go back to university but I'm not even completely sure about what I want to study and I'm not sure my family will agree to pay for that now.
No fucking idea what to do with my life.

>> No.12038571

I love you :)

>> No.12038713

>>12037792
Post pics

>> No.12038741

>>12038148
Based

>> No.12038747

>>12038548
Anon, you should check out either/or, that's a good book about regret and indecision, not that i've read it, but as far as i know the gist of it goes that no matter what you fucking do, you'll end up regretting it, so might aswell pick one path now that you have the power and do some shit because anything you do is going to have it's bad side. the last part is totally my own bullshit by the way don't attribute that to kierkegaard

>> No.12038774

I have been thinking a lot about fate lately and coincidence and that sort of thing. I understand large numbers and that but looking back some things seem too coincidental to have not been guided, right? I don't mean by like a god or something. I don't know. It is what it is.

>> No.12038786

>>12038747
Thanks, I'll check it out.
Just hope it wont make things worse.

>> No.12038795
File: 164 KB, 971x1457, 09b_tea_cravatIMG_3606.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12038795

>>12038543
>miracle of why anything exists at all
>miracle of why life exists at all
>miracle of why life specifically exists that specifically seeks after miracles and tries to understand and appreciate the world in a transcendently moral way
>not being in a mystic awe of the weltratsel as your default state

>> No.12038843

I unironically believe in some sort of interconnection between humans that is entirely unconscious and goes beyond the parsing of body language and scents and what have you. It's not a hold fast conviction or anything, and I'm aware that I'm talking out of a spiritual asshole, but I can't help but think so from time to time.

>> No.12038904

>>12038843
I'm 100% convinced of this too.
Either that or I have psychic powers

>> No.12038907

>>12037422
I'm homesick for a place that doesn't exist anymore.

>> No.12038910

Not as hyped to write as I was last week. I think I need another artistic pursuit I can bounce back and forth with writing on so I stay energized.

>>12038907
Aren't we all anon, aren't we all.

>> No.12038914

im not sure what my game should be about

>> No.12038932

>just hit 10k words for nanowrimo
>don't think I'll be done with my novel around 50k words
or
inhales
SKREEEEEE

>> No.12038938

>>12038914
the danger of gods interacting with mortals
or Come, Sweet Nerevar. Wait What Are You Doing With That Hammer?

>> No.12038943

The Buddhists are probably correct that attachment is the root of all suffering, but I don't like the implications of it.

>> No.12039001

I would trade several inches of my height and dick length, my health, my sanity and all of my material possessions for even a few more IQ points. I HATE being a brainlet.

>> No.12039017

>>12039001
Ignorance is bliss, my son. I would happily do the opposite.

>> No.12039036

>tfw too scared to look at her reply

>> No.12039040

>>12039036
Don't remain a fucking pussy anon, do it

>> No.12039079

I want to die.

>> No.12039080

>>12039036
>>12039040
Well?

>> No.12039163

>>12039040
>>12039080
>Yes she'd like to [go on a date] but she's really busy and doesn't know when she'll be able to
I'm going to choose to believe this, at least for a little while

>> No.12039192

>>12039163
Here's the most important advice I was ever given when it comes to asking out / dating girls, which can possibly save you dozens of humiliations, hundreds of disappointments, and countless hours of your time that you would have spent fretting and obsessing

When asking out girls, evaluate the situation from a neutral stance, instead of seeing it from your helplessly limited first-person perspective, of trying to exercise perfect control over someone else's fickle emotions while having no idea what they're really thinking so that you can make sure that they like you. Stop obsessing over the infinity of minutiae that you could hypothetically be adjusting to woo this person more effectively. Take a step back, look at the situation neutrally, and do what would be "reasonably the best thing to do in the average situation like this one."

It's not personal. If you fail, or it fizzles, or she ghosts you, it means nothing. There are so many fucking variables going on here, the odds are so against you, you have to successfully land so many perfect die rolls in a row, that it simply makes no sense to evaluate individual attempts as if they were attempts. Do your best, use a reasonable amount of strategy and effort, put your best foot forward, but don't obsess. Just take your best shot, and don't be a tryhard, don't humiliate yourself or try to squeeze 1% more chance of success out of the situation by increasing your mental anguish by 5000% or sacrificing your dignity.

Even if you do everything right it's likely that any woman you initially hit it off with will still ghost you, or have second thoughts, or stop ovulating and suddenly lose interest in you, or (unbeknownst to you) stop using you for an ego boost because she's going through a dry spell or bad breakup but never had any intention of letting you get anywhere real. You can't control or even see any of these variables, and they're ALL in play when it comes to women.

So just take your shot and move on. Use the confidence and the experience you gained from this encounter to go talk to ten other girls, and take ten more shots. 4 of those will fizzle too, 5 will lead to decent dates but nothing serious, and 1 will somehow be a trick shot you never even tried to pull off but somehow managed despite yourself.

It's just not worth humiliating yourself or being a tryhard. If you look at dates like "oh god oh god oh god I hope this works out please let me get laid" it's like trying to roll six sixes in a row with a die and going "oh god oh god please let it be six again SIX yes oh my god now I only need three more!!!!" You'll drive yourself insane. You have to abstract yourself from it, realize you're going to be at that table rolling those dice for a while, routinize the process, and do it in a way that maintains your dignity and doesn't have you constantly betraying who you are.

Paradoxically when you stop giving a fuck your confidence also perceptibly increases.

>> No.12039195

>>12039163
dont

shes lett betabuxxed

>> No.12039213
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12039213

People keep saying Trump is fascism, but it makes me think they're just poorly read if they think that. They want open borders a countries and cultures that are actively fascist or totalitarian, and label it as liberty. I'm not being /pol/ here, but it makes me want to ask "What do you want, exactly?" but I have no desire for anyone to dox me, call my workplace, and inform them that I'm a neo-nazi because I'm fond of western civilization. I dunno.

>> No.12039296

I'm trying to rediscover what special set of factors brings out the most impassioned periods of writing and creativity.

There was a period in my early twenties when I wrote like a god damn genius. It was, and other writers have attested to this phenomenon, as if the stories would write themselves. What I was doing felt important, as if I were tracing out a seam of importance, teasing out a necklace of images from the tangled jewelry boudoir of a dream somehow realer than I. Fiction in particular felt like it mattered and every story I wrote or even just entertained writing was like a mission assignment delivered to me by the highest authority in the land.

Nowadays I can't make myself take it that seriously. The cynicism of a dying medium has corrupted me; the poet sees his terrifying alter ego in the mirror in the form of the accountant. I can get riled up working on a long form essay or a manifesto about philosophical arcana and moonshot political treaties, but my ability to write stories that move people has dwindled to a halt. Now fiction seems to me like what it is, a tragic, suffering medium, assailed on all sides by entertainment giants dog piling on it like a bunch of schoolyard bullies on the back of the class nerd.

With all that said and accounted for I don't want to hang up my hat in the story writing trade before I really even hit my prime. But different needs call for different kinds of tools, Stories are one kind of tool. A tool for unlocking greater stages and gradations of consciousness and accentuated degrees of the highest feeling. If it's not doing that in one shape or another I'm not interested.

>> No.12039332

>>12039213
By that same token, what do you want exactly?

I can tell you right now that if you are an American, the US looks like a total dumpster-fire from the outside.

>> No.12039343
File: 331 KB, 753x707, 1540959975573.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12039343

>>12037621
I think about this all the time, honestly a shame imo

>tfw no dwarfbro neanderthals and hobbitbro floriensis

>> No.12039351

>>12039213
What really frosts me is how some people can be so eager to changes things they don't understand. Who are the biggest supporters of mass immigration? I tend to find they are comfortable, upper middle class liberals, people far removed and sheltered from the gritty realities of this country and ignorant of the inexorable law of unintended consequences. These pro-immigration types won't have to compete with these immigrants on the labor market like the poor who already live here. More immigrants undermine the poor of this country. The liberals shit on the poor. No wonder they turn to Trump, if only in the knowledge that Trump can hurt liberals who are their economic terrorizors even more so than conservatives if only in that they do it unwittingly.

I know Americans who have lived in the country since birth who struggle to get approved for healthcare, and then immigrants come and get special treatment by these liberal governments. The Democrats hold the struggling underclass of this country in contempt and want to toss in even more ballast on an already strained and depleted social welfare system.

>> No.12039371

>>12039351
>I know Americans who have lived in the country since birth who struggle to get approved for healthcare, and then immigrants come and get special treatment by these liberal governments. The Democrats hold the struggling underclass of this country in contempt and want to toss in even more ballast on an already strained and depleted social welfare system.

So basically, you are saying our government doesn`t know how to run the country as it is, we don`t need even more people coming in to complicate things even more.

The country is broken, close the gate and do some maintenance before letting more people on the ride.

>> No.12039392

>>12039192
excellent advice i came to similar conclusions the hard way

>> No.12039408

>>12039343
Yeah, it really sucks that all the cool humanoid species died out. Instead of having ripped dwarfs and hole dwelling hobbits, we have... ugh... Homo sapiens

>> No.12039429
File: 21 KB, 350x500, FB_IMG_1477327550576.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12039429

My pseudo ex-girlfriend just revealed to me that she was never sexually attracted to me. I've known this for years but it still hurts so god damn bad to hear her say it. Being undesirable is a torment that will never cease. No amount of lifting will ever cure my shit hair or ugly face

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAaAAaAaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>> No.12039455

>>12039429
I don't know your situation but she could easily be lying to make you feel shitty if she knows abt your insecurities
Why'd she even say that about you
What a cunt

>> No.12039474

>>12038130
I agree. Some mental processes are subconscious because that is the healthiest place for them.
Go back to sleep, sheeple.

>> No.12039522

>>12037422
The older I get the more I learn, the more I learn, the more I learn the more I realize how little I know. If I keep going at this rate by the time I die I will be utterly untethered from reality, with no solid mores to define my beliefs, or even my fundamental personality.

>> No.12039544

May be a bit pleb but I have been in quite the Nirvana and grunge mood. I think it's the dreary weather. Makes me kind of miss the days when I was a giant pleb and dressed "grungey" as a kid. I don't think I ever really stopped but not all of my pants are ripped so there is that.

>> No.12039600
File: 140 KB, 800x600, saguaro cactus in Saguaro National Park.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12039600

Am i a faggot?

Cacti are the most stoic of plants. It is not the appearance of roughness that matters but the vibrant life within them. True, they are rugged, but they do not attempt the invincibility of palm trees heavily rooted into the ground against the winds, nor do they the pack the heavy poison of hemlock to claim vengeance on creatures smart enough to exploit them. Live as you were made to be, make use of what is given, and when you have shortcomings, do not deny who you are.

>> No.12039603

I hate novels and I like nonfiction. Novels are interesting and are objectively good but I can't for my life write about them. There is something about romantic 19th century novels that piss me off everytime I have to write a paper on them.

>> No.12039611

>>12038309
Pay attention in class you little shit.

>> No.12039626

>>12039371
Yeah, basically. The country would benefit immensely from a domestic turn. Large investments in infrastructure, an overhaul of the social security services, a general updating and modernization of the government's procedures and practices. Of course Trump in his own, poorly articulated way is pursuing this in the domain of foreign policy through his America First nationalism, but he's missing the actual fucking point that you need to invest in the renovation of the country itself domestically.

More immigrants, especially uneducated barely literate immigrants who will have difficulty assimilating will only exacerbate the problems. If you want to fix immigration stop them from coming by offering support to the countries that are producing them.

It would be cheaper for the US to bankroll stabilizing these troubled Central American countries that can't keep their oceans of poor people contained. Economic development in the global system of today benefits everyone, fix-me-up developing economies are some of the growth markets with the most potential.

China gets this and so has been bankrolling parts of Africa for years. They know that when the Africans use Alibaba instead of Amazon and Baidu instead of Google, or sell exclusive mining contracts to China, they will have more power and influence.

>> No.12039636

>>12038387
Some of us just don't need daddy to tell us what to do anymore.

>> No.12039663
File: 105 KB, 1024x768, 70b55b665c2bce9d8a739fa41a2d638150b953e1_hq.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12039663

>>12039371
>>12039626

As an outsider looking in, the whole illegal immigration thing in the United States seems insane. How could the most powerful country in the world allow this to happen? Someone told me that there could be up to 30 million or so illegal aliens in the country; that's more than my country's population, I cannot even imagine that.

Hope you guys can fix it all soon.

>> No.12039679

>>12039626

Just nuke America desu. Instead of giving the tired, hungry, and the poor as immigrants maybe the immigrants could be nuclear missiles so we'd never have to see another selfish American rant about how because some don't have healthcare and others do it means it's bad for the ones that get it. Wake the fuck up out of your HFCS coma, you mongoloid. Everyone should have healthcare in your country. Why can't it be so? I'll tell you why. You're all a bunch of giant cucks. You're pussies. Americans project that other countries are pussies and cucks when all they need to do to find them is look in the proverbial mirror. No healthcare, rich control everything, your food gives you diabetes, no unions, cops kill whomever they please with no repercussion, your politicians are absolute dunces, and a million more things. What do you complain about? An immigrant from a country your country fucked for American interests gets the help all of you should get and you would rather have it taken away.

Goddamn, I hate yanks. Seriously a nation of wankers.

>> No.12039733

>>12037963
I do sometimes. Acrylic is nice to work with, doesn't have a strong scent and needs a medium to make it thicc like oil. Oil has a strong scent but easy with textures.

>> No.12039734

>>12039626
>It would be cheaper for the US to bankroll stabilizing these troubled Central American countries that can't keep their oceans of poor people contained.
but we do and they still can't defend their borders. We've bankrolled I think every central american country over several decades, and they still can't get their shit together for whatever reason. I hear a lot of people say that it's US corporations that outcompete local businesses/farmers and therefore the countries remain remain broke. I don't know how true that is.

>> No.12039783

There's a very high chance I'll be losing my v-card in less than two weeks to a beautiful, virgin, teenage hapa. I’m 26, it’s about fucking time. Though I’m looking forward to it, I’m not overly excited like I thought I would be. She lives five states away, so I realize there’s very little chance a successful, long-term relationship could develop between the two of us. I’ve seen her a few times before, and we’ve cuddled, done other sexual things with each other and its been a lot of fun. I realize though, once I finally get what I want, it’s really all downhill from there. I’m not sure I’ll even finish school, I’ve been enrolled for several years now but continue to neglect my studies. I have no friends. No job, intend on finding a shit job soon. Basically, the only positive thing in my life at the moment is this girl I’ve been messing around with that lives five states away. In two weeks when I come back after seeing her again (hopefully a non-virgin) I’m going to be depressed as fuck. But hey, at least I won’t be a virgin, I guess…

>> No.12039801

I think I should join the military but it's so late in life. I've accomplished nothing, squandered everything. Maybe it was always too late.

>> No.12039818

i dont think i know how to love.

>> No.12039826

>english majors must be proficient in at least one foreign language
huh? Why do universities do this?

>> No.12039845

>>12038387
Some believe that god created everything for the individual to find their own meaning. I think they are called theists?

>> No.12039853

>>12039818
come to my house anon, i'll show ya how to love.

>> No.12039855

>>12039826
to filter out the riff raff, like you.

>> No.12039947

>>12037432
People like you disgust me. I honestly can't wait for the elites to cull you all.

>> No.12039982

>>12037422

"what's on your mind."

>> No.12039987

>>12037432
Get a hooker, for fuck's sake!

>> No.12039988

>>12037495
>Sometimes I wish I was an alien.

I used to think like that. Then I visited France.

>> No.12039994

>>12039988
What does that even mean? The niggers make you feel alienated from humanity, or their savagery alienates them from humanity?

>> No.12039997
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12039997

>>12039994

If I where to visit a foreign country I would be a....

>> No.12039999

>>12039997
tourist?

>> No.12040001

>>12039999

Ooooooooooor...

>> No.12040004

>>12040001
a nigger

>> No.12040047
File: 109 KB, 1080x1051, Dqdv4Y8XgAEcq8k.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12040047

>>12037422
>
<
>
<
>
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>
<
>BIG CUNTZ
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>
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>
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>
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>

>> No.12040107

Ow! My stomach really hurts.

>> No.12040226

>>12039826
Is this true?

>> No.12040239
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12040239

I am forced into a situation in which I must confront and reveal my failure when I would prefer to bury it and move on

>> No.12040242
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12040242

>>12039600
Based cacti.
Take this picture of my 7 year old Lophophora williamsii.

>> No.12040255

>>12040239
Believe me, burying it and moving on is way worse. It will always be on your mind and will gnaw on you forever.

>> No.12040283

>>12039783
Best of luck.

If this is real, then maybe there's still hope for me.

>> No.12040313

>>12040242

Sweet cactus.

>> No.12040321

>>12037422
how did he get that helmet on? his forehead is bigger than the neck-hole.

>> No.12040369
File: 1.54 MB, 480x264, 1514942804063.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12040369

>>12039600
So poisoning and killing anyone who takes advantage of you is denying who you are?

>> No.12040372

>>12040313
Thanks Anon.
It contains high amounts of mescaline but I don't plan on killing it because it's been with me for so long and grows very slowly.

>> No.12040487

Question for our christfriends: in Christian theology is our Earth, ie, the world God created, considered to be a perfect creation, or is flawed somehow? Is God even capable of creating something that is flawed? I imagine he must be, being all powerful, but that doesn't sound very divine.

>> No.12040503

>>12037422
The key to great literature is guided ambiguity. You’re welcome

>> No.12040515

>>12040321
>helmet...

...*cringe*... yikes

>> No.12040528

>>12039626
>It would be cheaper for the US to bankroll stabilizing these troubled Central American countries that can't keep their oceans of poor people contained. Economic development in the global system of today benefits everyone, fix-me-up developing economies are some of the growth markets with the most potential.
The US literally destabilized these countries in the first place

>> No.12040536

>>12039679
This desu, please destroy this place so we can build something better

>> No.12040576

>>12039663
Most of those people have come in on work visas which are then, due the fuckery of the american immigration system, refused for renewal even the holder has gainful employment, a family, pays taxes, have been here a decade, etc. What the fuck are they supposed to do? For example, right now there's a guy holed up in a church because they're trying to deport him for overstaying his visa (which they randomly chose not to renew even though he has a job and two children), he needs dialysis, which his country of origin can't adequately provide, and will die if he is deported. None of this would be an issue if american didn't make it fucking impossible to get permanent residence, let alone citizenship.

>> No.12040607

I hate Election Day. I hate American democracy and the fact that we are forced to pick from a pool of one-percenters who work solely for the interests of themselves, the party, and the media. I hate that the media paints those who vote third-party or not at all as being complicit in "fascism." But the real fascism lurks within the entire system. We're expected not to question mainstream media and accept them as our "friends." But the second we stop asking questions is the second we open our gates to fascism.

>> No.12040619

>>12040607
That may be true but surely you can enjoy the spectacle if nothing else

>> No.12040621

>>12040607
It's not just american democracy phampai. It's the same everywhere.

>> No.12040626

>>12040621
That's not surprising.
>>12040619
It's hard to enjoy the spectacle when you're constantly bombarded by it.

>> No.12040643

>>12040607
In regards to third-party voting, it's been mathematically demonstrated that the american electoral system reaches equilibrium with two major parties, it is quiet literally impossible for a third to gain ground unless one of the major two *completely* collapses. The only (electoral) way forward, my friend, is to primary your third party guys into the main party and take it over. It sounds reprehensible to most people but that's really the only option.

>> No.12040655

>>12037422
>get the day off
>plan to read, write, and play vidya all morning, after a quick run to the doctors office
>Doctor is two hours late, still hasn’t called me, entire morning ruined
>it’s raining
I hate society. I hate life. This is all a fucking scam. I want to live in the woods

>> No.12040661

>>12040643
>It sounds reprehensible
Why? Anyone who thinks that is probably unintelligent.

>> No.12040673

>>12040661
Participating in the two-party system legitimizes it

>> No.12040677

>>12040673
Participating in life legitimizes death.

>> No.12040694
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12040694

>>12037422
The only thing that brought Rodrigo solace was Guiles Corey's music* and a cute girls doing book review vlogs. This semester really took it's toll on him.
*Author's Note: Hey, kids! I don't want to brag, but I'm pretty rad for a normal dude.

>> No.12040716

Holy fucking shit your writing sucks. I don't really care for anybody else's writing in the class either but goodness gracious yours is E.T. Atari levels of bad. Generic beyond generic, I don't know how you do it.

>> No.12040802

>>12039679
Blow it out your ass. You have no idea what you're talking about. "yanks", "wankers" I can tell you're some kind of brit. Your country has been on the decline even before the US. For over a century, since WWI. We're just getting the kinks out and if you're not from here, shut the fuck up.

>> No.12040825

>>12040643
That seems dumb, and something that could be modified. Elections could be based on more than the plurality of the vote. If European countries can do it there's no reason the U.S can't. For one thing it hasn't always been Republicans and Democrats. The Whig party was a thing some time ago (with their neat owl mascot, someone should bring it back), and there have been other times when an unexpected contender came out of the blue.

>> No.12040827

>Tell someone im bot voting and dont really care
>Get told off because its because im white priveleged etc

Like do these people think absolutely every colored person votes or something?

>> No.12040862

>>12040825
It is dumb and the system could be modified, but as stands it's two parties. The Whigs were supplanted by the (Lincoln-style) Republican party after they completely fell apart over the question of slavery, there's never been in a time in this countries history where we had a stable multi-party system.

>> No.12040866
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12040866

>>12040004

>> No.12040869

>>12040827
I'm guessing they were trying to articulate that as a white man you are minimally affected by the goings of the federal government. I know that for myself literally nothing has changed in my day to day since Trump got elected. It almost happened when the GOP were fucking around with grad school in their tax bill but that got removed.

>> No.12040874

I really miss literature classes, it was very nice being able to read a book then sit and discuss it with a group of people, even if most of them were brainlets. I wish there were book clubs that read literary fiction, that would be a good substitute.

>> No.12040876

>>12040827
Colored people barely know how to take care of themselves, they get congratulated by folks when finally figure out how to vote

>> No.12040877
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12040877

>>12037422
i am lonely and a failing uni so i will probably do nothing.

>> No.12040881

Right now I'm thinking about failure. Not my failures personally but the general sensation of failure as a concept.

Of course there's the basic verification aspect of failure, the pass/not pass some set of conditions. But there is also the feeling of failure, a bitter cud of acid and rejection and resentment. And in a fiercely competitive society we produce this shitty sensation in others and have it produced in ourselves on a regular basis as part of the normal functioning of society. No wonder everyone's going crazy.

Failure is related to rejection. In some sense failure is rejection, in that the ideal or desirable result of an action is made inaccessible by a rejection of circumstances in conformance with one's intentions.

Most of all failure hurts. Nature punishes the failures of her children with brutality, sending the fledgling newborn chick off to an early grave, or snatching the second-too-slow antelope by the hungry jaws of death.

The unforgiving, it's all on you aspect of the modern economy is surely tied to the high and sometimes increasing levels of stress, drug abuse, alcoholism depression and even suicide in developed countries. South Korea, Japan, the US, the UK, all have similar symptoms. If you don't get into the right university your life is over by the time your 18. If you don't have a stable career by your mid twenties, nobody will hire you because you're behind the pack. (In the US) oh and if you can't find a stable career, have fun paying off those loans and not having healthcare and stuff. All of it is enough to drive people insane. And it does.

Nothing good will come of a society that generates more failures than it does winners, more broken shells than self-actualized individuals.

>> No.12040906

>>12037422
SEVERAL HUNDRED YEARS AGO, THE SLOVENIC COMPUTER BECAME A REAL DEVIL GOD AND IT ORGANIZED THE FIRST TOTALITARIAN SUPERSTITION COMMUNISM RELIGION, PRAWO SLAVNA and hundreds of years later by C. God top secret INTENSIFIED REPITITION of FABRICATED HISTORICAL CRISIS SYNDROME created the schismatic Mafia Communist Catholicism, Catholicism means totalitarianism, Dict. FOR CONTROL AND MANIPULATION OF THE HUMAN RACE INTO THE OVER ALL PLAN, to explore and control the entire Universe.

>> No.12040936

>>12040802
lmao. You could have universal health care in an instant if you spent 1% less on the military. You're a joke.

>> No.12040952

>>12040869
But work with plenty of colored people and their lives are exactly the same before and after trump and were two fucking years into this idiot.

>> No.12040961
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12040961

I was going to go walk around the run down part of town and do some photography, but it's raining so I guess I'll stay in instead.

>> No.12040966

>>12040961
Nazi Jewmany occupied Poland in 1939. Hitler JEW gang made Nazi JEW HANS FRANK total governor of Poland with his JEW gangs, provinces rulers, high Gestapo, military S.S. etc. Many of these Nazi Jews lived in the luxurious city site JEW GHETTO of the capital city, Warsaw. ALL DURING WWII, AS ALWAYS, like ALL European cities, Warsaw had a luxurious JEW GHETTO section, similar to JEW CENTRAL $$$$ PARK SECTION in New York City, JerUSAlem. By 1943, Jewmany was doomed. Kosher USSR offered secret treacherous TOTAL peace treaty to Nazi Jewmany, giving Jewmany ALL 1941 borders, including the lands of USSR SLAVE ALLY, Poland.

>> No.12040968

>>12040961
The rain makes it better.

>> No.12040969

>>12040952
Which is why I think that "privilege" isn't much use beyond pointing out very coarse hierarchies in society.

>> No.12040971

>>12040877
>>12040881
BY 1943, VIRTUALLY ALL of the SIX MILLION POLISH PEOPLE WERE EXTERMINATED in experiments to build the C. God SECRET Stairway to the Stars, by the Computer God MASTER RACE FRANKENSTEIN RADIO HEAD WORSE DEADLY ELECTRICAL JEW DISEASE in the entire history of the
Universe, CONSPIRACY.

>> No.12040974
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12040974

>>12040969

The USSR Army neared its’ 1941 borders. COMPUTER GOD evacuated hundreds of thousands of the TO BE BURNED ALIVE JEW DISEASES, who operated the Nazi HUMAN MEAT FACTORY EXTERMINATION CAMPS and also ordered the camps ripped down for secrecy. AT THE SAME TIME, in 1943, the LUXURIOUS CITY SIZE WARSAW JEW GHETTO WAS ADDING NEW SECTIONS.
In the world-wide Communist Gangster Computer God fabricated farce history and thousands of COMPUTER GOD Frankenstein Radio Head JEW parroting puppet Hollywood movies, Jews were persecuted, all propaganda conspiracy of C. God OVERALL PLAN.

>> No.12040975

>>12040968
I don't have a lens hood so I don't think I'll be able to shoot anything that's not a blurry mess from water on the lens.

>> No.12040977

I woke up from a 3 hour day dream, reminiscing about my childhood and my life and i now reached the conclusion that i have always dislike existing. It's a common theme, there was no trauma, no bad parenting (much the contrary, my parents were great), no external abuse or anything, yet i couldn't ever really enjoy life. I was only "happy" alone, and i mean this in the most atomizing way, that is, i could only be decently "happy" interacting with myself. This means no television, no literature, no videogames, no other people, nothing, nothing satisfied me, i remember. as a kid My favorite past time was walking around the neighborhood daydreaming about whatever. Nowadays not even the daydreams provide me pleasure, which means i just exist, waiting for death. no lifting nor gf nor anything will bring me a connection with the external world, i will always be unsatisfied, bored, disconnected, aloof, in eternal ADHD.I think i was born with a malfunction in the dopamine system, which makes this whole existence thing really stupid, to think about: just a little misbehaving on a neurological eletrical pathway is responsible for 23 years of pure discontent and suffering. And then people wonder why humanity has become so materialist. How can in the face of such information you don't laugh and shrug off existence? In the end i'm too much of a coward to end it all, of course, we all are, so there's a long 60-70 years ahead of me.

>> No.12040990

Lend my japanese teacher another of my books. In there, there is a short story of a teenager living with 3 woman who take care of him and he works in the crop field in return. I called them mothers each of the 3 because he was orphan, and the city has this rule that a growing orphan boys must live with a foster family that has unmarried woman in them to take care of the orphan. He must work and provide for them at young age so eventually when they are grown enough, the woman may marry him. While the boy is growing up, he consider that bride to be a "mother". In this case, there were 3 of them living together, sister to themselves.
Can't make her stop bringing how strange that is, making jokes about Freud and stuff.
Why woman are this cruel?

>> No.12040999

>>12040990
Dude, it is really strange.

>> No.12041012
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12041012

>>12037827
Miss that being alone together feeling anon?

>> No.12041028
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12041028

>>12040990
>giving your teacher a book about your mommy gf fetishes
>y does is she maek fun of me???

>> No.12041032

Wonder what does it mean to have power? Does it mean...to tell people to do everything I want, like a tiny baby? Does it mean to influence the destiny of the world? Or is there much more: could I lose my mind...if i gained the political power?

>> No.12041037

>>12038273
The second you start actively trying to make whoopie with the women around you they almost always shut it down. But the moment you appear not to actively want it you become king of all coitus.

>> No.12041040
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12041040

>>12038309
Pay attention and stop posting on this greek bathhouse history forum.

>> No.12041056
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12041056

>>12037422
I wish proof of aliens showed up on the news or even better some sort of contact with them. Preferably the way hitchhikers of the galaxy had it.

>> No.12041065
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12041065

>>12038500
Go live innawoods for awhile. Dudes on /k/ do it for a reason. I've done it for a month every year for the past few years and after I return to normal life I find things to be a lot easier. It breaks up the mundaneness of life and puts things into perspective. I have a spot I return to every year and set up camp and just exist with nature, I know that sounds like some hippie shit but it does help me keep my head on straight.

>> No.12041097

>>12040999
>>12041028
The boy literally transformed into a werewolf (i called them Vagabonds) in a couple of pages after setting the exposition.
Meanwhile, back in america you can literally move to Arizona to marry your first cousin.

>> No.12041107
File: 82 KB, 244x250, 1538438510338.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12041107

>>12039429
Anything an ex-SO says about you should be ignored unless it has some merit. She says she wasn't sexually attracted to you, but she still made whoopie with your ass. That doesn't make sense to me, sounds like shes just trying to hurt you even further. I would stop talking to this person indefinitely. Toxic people that do this shit have no place in your life anon, fuck' em.

>> No.12041117

>>12040607
Just vote for deez nuts

>> No.12041129

>>12040827
This is an unsurprising product of mass-media hysteria. People want you to believe that by not voting (or by not voting the "right" way) you are literally putting six million Mexican children in camps and that you're basically an honorary Klansman. When in fact, both major parties are merely in service of their own capitalist interests.

>> No.12041150
File: 440 KB, 590x333, 1541479401.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12041150

>>12041012
Yes

>> No.12041161

I'm wrecking my brain trying to find the needed balance to write a charming children's book that can be also enjoyed by adults without it becoming excessively condescending towards kids nor overly "so deep bro".

>> No.12041164
File: 559 KB, 499x412, 1540321742029.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12041164

>>12041150
>>12041150
It'll be alright anon. You'll grow from this experience. Go make some tea and read a good book and forget the world exists for a while.

>> No.12041166

>>12041129
>liberals freak out about children being put in camps
>go protest about it
>"ok fine we'll put them in camps with their families instead of separating them. also we won't do anything about the ones already separated."
>liberals are happy
>except about those DSA dweebs who were blockading ICE buildings, they need to follow the rule of law!
I fucking hate liberals so much

>> No.12041228
File: 33 KB, 640x360, WIN_20181106_13_03_50_Pro.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12041228

when i order a cup of coffee and they ask for a name i use odysseus,agamemnon,ajax and astyanax.no one recognizes the names.this bothers me.

>> No.12041248

>>12041228
>tfw when i reference the greeks epic style
Subscribe to James' Youniverse.

>> No.12041271

>>12037422
To that anon who encouraged me to not give up with driving.
Thank you, now I have a driving licence and can confidently say that I'm a decent driver.

>> No.12041279

>>12040971
Go to bed Francis.

>> No.12041286

>>12038543
Give Miguel de Unamuno a read; you might find some comfort in his own search of faith.

>> No.12041287

>>12039600
>>12040242
I'll never forget the first time I visited the deserts of Utah as a kid, how my sibling's eyes lit up as we poured water on a bryophite, watching it bloom back to life and turn green after a couple of minutes. Desert plants are so fucking cool.

>> No.12041595

whats is called when everything is the same but it feels different?

>> No.12041753

Are women just extremely neurotic about this whole rapists are everywhere thing or am I the one in the wrong? It just seems so oversensational and most these women love to live in major metro areas. So like if youre exposed to that many people theres just a more likely scenario that something "could" happen.

>> No.12041768
File: 15 KB, 175x231, 1519692556139.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12041768

>>12041595
Living in the 6th dimension.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxOnbpWVELU

>> No.12041770

>>12041753
absolutely. the truth is that life is boring, all these people who screech about the "impending doom of" insert political matter here, are only doing so because they need a great threat to fight against, a narrative to provide meaning to their life. women are frail so they use it in every case, they're always afraid of something, the racists, the rapists, the mysoginists and so on, they love to be the underdog because in the end, the western female is the most coddled class of human in humanity. the truth is, save for black neighborhoods, the US is unbelievably safe, though, because the inherent fragile nature of the female, she should be aware there really is a chance she'll get raped if she isn't cautious, but if she's living in a big city, the chances of that happening are slim, the rest is only, as always, screeching

>> No.12041793

I fucked up this time. Twice, I've betrayed his trust. I had hidden something that I'd deemed innocuous from him. It was not my place to. Why hide it? I've made things worse. It would've been fine if I'd come out with the truth. Now I feel myself losing grasp of him. Even if I don't lose him now, this will mark the beginning of where we fall apart.

I been here. I've done this to others.

>> No.12041802

Oh my god I am so FUCKING tired but I can't sleep because of this damned cough.

>> No.12041845

>>12041770
Basically what I daid to her and said you have a large project ahead of you trying to change literally every male that exists and and could exist. Than of course yada yada raise them right muh nurture. Gets so tiresome

>> No.12041849

>>12041753
This is the safest least "rapey" time in history to be a woman. As safety goes up (because of nanny state societal controls), women's narcissistic delusional fixation on the infinite worth and allure of their own vaginas skyrockets proportionately.

Imagine being a male gigolo who has never thought of anything in his entire life except fuckin', gettin' paid to fuck, and spending the money you get from fuckin' doing fun but shallow shit. That's roughly what it is to be a woman. You tend to interpret the entire universe through that lens. If something is ever wrong, it's the fault of those-who-pay-for-the-fuckin', because they manifestly run society and always seem to have the money and power you crave. And this seeps into your brain until it isn't even a broken line of reasoning anymore, just a reflex or an instinct, so that when you're simply BORED or feeling vaguely pissy because of a hormonal fluctuation or seasonal depression you reach for the nearest megaphone and start complaining about how the world doesn't appreciate your dick enough or doesn't allow your dick to do what your dick wants or how certain aspects of how people want your dick all the time are annoying and you wish you could only experience the good parts like getting money without having to deal with any of the downsides.

Rape fixation is just one giant manifestation of women saying "I don't like the downsides of being a walking bundle of sexual capital; I only want the upsides of that." Man looking at you and you don't want it? Rape. Man looking at you, and you wanted it a second ago but don't want it now? Rape. Men not spontaneously giving you money and making you feel good when you're in a bad mood and wandering around looking for a place to buy lunch? Somehow, somehow, this is rape.

>> No.12041859

There are days once every couple of weeks when I am overwhelmingly disgusted by my own existence. Like, a person will give me a weird look on the train or in class and I will immediately feel like shit. I thought I got over my neurosis, but alas :(

>> No.12041895
File: 3.69 MB, 1920x1080, 1538440297720.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12041895

>>12041859

>> No.12041922

>>12041895
Is that from anything in particular or just a drawing?

>> No.12041938

>>12041849
mephedrone is bitch. i dont want to know this whore. FUCK IT

>> No.12041963

>>12041849
women being raped is a bit of a paradox evolution-wise when you think about it. On hand it is overriding their ability to choose their offspring's genetic material(unless they can influence that i gneuinely dont know), but on the other, in the ancestral environment, if youre getting raped, then chances are the guy is at least pretty powerful and therefore probably not bad genetic material.

getting raped by really low tier men must have basically never happened whenn we lived in tribes when you think about it

>> No.12041995

>>12040283
100% real my fren, there's always hope. Protip: I've been lifting for roughly a year, which I believe has helped me a lot in making this happen. Not saying you should lift, but you should always be looking to improve yourself in some form.

>> No.12042075

>>12041963
>Indigenous village
>The men of the village goes out for the hunt before winter, a month and a half trip.
>Tribal leaders chooses the strongest males for waging territorial wars against other tribes.
>Children, elders and woman stay in the village.
>A low tier man with scrawny body and an ugly mug isn't even considered to part of their hunting nor war pack
>He stays back home
>With no other men around.
>And the men return and come home just before the winter.
>They have after-war sex with their woman all winter.
>Some even challenge other men in a fight. Winner takes the woman of the man and their children are added to his lineage.
>Then, after winter, the men go out again to hunt and wage some more wars, leaving their woman behind with their bellys pronounced.
>The men go and fight and hunt. But their woman were laid successfully so they can't satiate themselves with their wifes back home.
>So they fight and hunt, and then they rape their victory prize.
>And the man come back with their spoils just before summer.
>Their woman awaits them with full bellys and a beautiful season to pass the rest of the time until is time to go again.
>But the children are not theirs.
>Every single woman of the village was pregnant with one sole seed
>That low tier man with scrawny body and ugly mug... and a 11inch that no men, big or strong, had.
>And he laid every woman just before their husbands came.
>And when they did, his seed was already there.
>And the next year, the same.
>And again.

>> No.12042321

>>12041286
thanks for the recc, fren. maybe i'll re-learn some spanish.

>> No.12042404

>>12040369
When you fail, you fail and it is important to not be spiteful about it. It is not necessarily another person that takes advantage of you, rather the things in life that have gotten the best of you.

>> No.12042456
File: 6 KB, 172x172, Burning-for-Freedom-Peace-Flag.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12042456

*takes pull*

Because today is an important political day, although I normally refrain from engaging in public political thought because it seems pointlessly destructive to well-being, I'm going to humor myself in some pointless self-destruction. I voted today, and I voted liberal (because I'm not some kind of violent fascist) begrudgingly, with the same reluctance as I had when I voted for Hillary. My hesitation is that while I support most liberal policy this liberal temperament that's loosing itself across all platforms of social media is becoming indistinguishable from the conservative groupthink back in the day with its "you're either an employable straight-white male or a housewife or you deserve to be homeless:" today what I see is "you're either a bi-sexual marxist or you're a nazi" which both seem to me equally disagreeable. This kind of thinking is very unfortunate for artists, those who wish to provide society with a tangible way to experience the transcendental, especially those who introduce many varying points of view into their work (which I believe is the truth of human thinking). There's a reason the kind of art being produced these days (and over the last 20 years) is so tepid and that we don't have the same kind of cultural community that values creative expression unless it has some "agreeable" agenda. The measure of a party's dominance isn't in its ability to create laws but in its inability to find a sense of humor. Those with much to lose will make themselves immune to vulnerability (sword of damocles), and to Trump's credit, the man has made himself incredibly vulnerable. Personally, I admire a fellow who doesn't give a damn what people say about him (even though his policies are absurdly anti-human). While conservatism was the norm, there was Lenny Bruce. Now that liberals are the enforcers of cultural capital, there's 4chan.

*takes another pull*

*okay, another one* (1/2)

>> No.12042460
File: 368 KB, 581x543, feelthebeat.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12042460

>>12042456
I can imagine voting in the centuries past as an act of freedom or independence from a distant monarch but today it is an act of sublimation—giving up a true impulse to engage in social acceptability. That may be a sign of human maturity, but what's the value of human maturity if it buries expression? What I mean by this is that today, when your party is begging for your support, you will post an image of yourself with an "I voted!" sticker, encouraging others to vote when you really mean "vote for my agenda or die!" as you unabashedly say on all other days. That is hypocrisy my friends, and I feel comfortable saying that as I myself am a hypocrite in many ways. (2/2)

>> No.12042466

>>12041922
just a drawing

>> No.12042474

>>12042460
Voting to me has always seemed to me like a pacifying ritual in democracy. A vote in a population of millions is a small gesture, and immediately collectivizes the issues at hand. Individually voting is not an very empowering act. What would be an empowering act would be for you to get people in power's attention and get them to do what you tell them. Voting is a highly loose and indecisive means to influence a polity, although it certainly is better than nothing.

I'm still not a big fan of voting if it presumes a system that is itself corrupted at its foundations or otherwise deranged. When it comes down to "lesser of two evils thinking" I refuse to vote altogether out of principle. I didn't vote in the 2016 elections for this very reason.

When it becomes that bad, more serious measures are required. What those measures are is certainly open to debate, but if you have rights of assembly you might as well use it or lose it.

>> No.12042477

>>12042474
>Voting to me has always seemed to me like a pacifying ritual in democracy
>to me
>to me
I'm really not even trying at this point

>> No.12042479

>>12042474
>a pacifying ritual
I see it as the exact opposite, funnily enough. Voting is merely formalized mob violence, the implicit threat being 'there are more of us than you'.

>> No.12042485

>>12038087
Sorry for your loss anon, my heart hurt a bit reading this, I hope you'll have a happy life.

>> No.12042489

>>12042479
Yes but they're checking off little slips of paper, not bashing each other over the head. Then they go home thinking that they have just shaken hands with George Washington and Abe Lincoln smiles over them from heaven.

>> No.12042498

The identity politics fiasco really really fucked over the left because of liberals. It doesnt matter if racism is the wrong answer to it but it was the most bleeding obvious result of what was going to happen.

>> No.12042505

REEEE How do I make myself work hard on productive stuff in my free time instead of wasting my time on the internet or feeling sad as I walk around aimlessly outside while hoping that my 20s spontaneously stops feeling wasted?

>> No.12042511
File: 565 KB, 640x482, beautygod.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12042511

someone about a week ago posted here calling humanity a bunch of "transcendental niggers." i'm thankful that the chap did so because it externalized a concept i've been struggling with. i had come to the conclusion that somehow humanity was cursed to mortality forever, that we would never throughout the entirety of time achieve a sense of true knowledge or comfort in our existence because it would forever change. i don't believe in heaven but i also believe it's kind of impossible to die. we only go on because desire, and in my view the universe has a longing to house this mortal desire. "transcendental niggers" makes the situation a bit more humorous which i appreciate.

>> No.12042514

>>12042498
The liberals's big mistake is that they don't realize what people want is MONEY. Cash Rules Everything Around Me. These twits have favored these divisive identity issues and hoisted that over the populace's head while people are worried about getting their pensions cut or how they will ever pay off their student loans.

Many people are having shittier lives than they have to economically if the politicians just got their shit together. But they don't care, they're lackeys for the rich and powerful like the rest of them.

>> No.12042521

>>12042514
>Many people are having shittier lives than they have to economically if the politicians just got their shit together.

Hmmm. I almost got it here. It's been a long day.

>> No.12042585

>>12037422

My skull covers my brain.

>> No.12042592

>>12040881

>>12040881
>If you don't get into the right university your life is over by the time your 18.

Uncreative, unmotivated slave. This is such complete bullshit it's hilarious. Trust me when I say that 99.9% of employers do not give two fucks about where you got your degree if you can just do the work. And don't blame anybody but yourself if you sit back and expect the online application systems to have your best interests in mind. I literally wait outside the places I'm applying to and try to talk to the owners/managers. Or directly email prospective employers asking them if I can take them out for a drink. You have zero initiative and you wonder why nobody cares about you. But don't worry, you're no different than the rest of the pathetic zoomers judging by their boomer memes making fun of this mentality while simultaneously whining about not getting a job. And if you can't get a job? Guess what buddy! Learn your a skill and work for yourself! To much work? predictable


>If you don't have a stable career by your mid twenties, nobody will hire you because you're behind the pack.

Any actually respectable career expects literally nothing from people in their mid twenties except maybe an internship. Most aren't even done with school, wtf are you talking about?


>(In the US) oh and if you can't find a stable career, have fun paying off those loans

Nobodies problems but your own for going to a private school and majoring in a non translatable degree if you aren't already rich

>> No.12042597

>>12042321
You're welcome; it's always a pleasure to recommend an author here.

>> No.12042643

>>12042592
>mid 20s
>most not done with school
>in america

>> No.12042675

>>12042592
Communicating and networking is such a big factor in job finding, I unironically only have a HS Degree but was able to grease the right palms a few years ago and here I am with a decent IT job (Which desu I still farely know dick squat about)

>> No.12042737

Voting is stupid and changes nothing

>> No.12042763

>>12040802

Shut it, wanker. Americans really are a gaggle of ignorant and mongoloid twats.

>> No.12042764

>>12040974
you are retarded you are on 4chan where there are a lot of autists and yet you can't wrap your head around who is behaving autisticly.

>> No.12042769

>>12042643
>architecture
Absolute earliest to finish is the age of 26
>medical
Absolute earliest to finish is the age of 28
>law
Aboslute earliest to finish is the age of 25
>finance/accounting
Absolute earliest to finish and be licensed is the age of 24
>any and all science
Absolute earliest to finish in order to actually work in the field is the age of 25

More than 80% of people in university don't even finish their bachelor's in four years


>>12042675
Correct. The losers in this thread however will never understand this, and even if they do they'll think they have no capability of it. I'm a literal diagnosed schizoid but did not accept my 'predispositioned' place in this world and forced myself to learn the mechanics of social work functions. If I can do it most people can too

>> No.12042772

>>12042769
You just described an absolute minority of "careers"

>> No.12042795

>>12042772
>actually respectable careers
Everything else is such pussy shit you don't need anything but charisma to get the job because anybody with a pulse can do the work or will have a constant high turnover rate to the point of having a 'late start' meaning nothing. Also there's engineering and if you can't get a job in that field because you're 25 not 22 than you are an absolute failure

>> No.12042820

Dugin is a Leo Strauss clone

>> No.12042840

>>12042075
Some of the tribes formerly known as Eskimos used pre accuse men who got sick when hunting season was about to start so they wouldn't be left home alive with the women, so you have to be terminally ill to want to tell anyone you're sick come hunting time.

>> No.12042846

>>12042820
How? They're almost opposite in what they want

>> No.12042859

>>12042769
Architecture is seven years, even if you were eighteen leaving secondary education you could graduate before 26 so long as your birthday was in the first eight months of the year.

>> No.12042874

>>12042859
Depends. Here in California there are many 5 year programs instead of the typical 4 years than 3 years masters. But for both you still need 3 years of internship afterwards before you can even take the test to become licenced. It's a long process but you can work in the field until you drop dead unlike many other youth obsessed careers

>> No.12042890
File: 27 KB, 661x469, schopenhauer.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12042890

I've been a lot more content since embracing a negative hedonist approach to life. I recommend it.

>> No.12042915
File: 91 KB, 1600x1066, 9051F989-0AF6-4BE9-BFEA-D93D4C7AABCD.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12042915

>>12037422
We are alone and is painful

>> No.12042934

>>12042874
You get paid in all those jobs much younger than you're making out. Most of them if you're desperate for cash you can do a less prestigious and cheaper degree in the some field with one year slaving at most and be earning a middle class income in your mid twenties. The person who takes the extra time and income hit to become an entry level barrister instead of getting paid like an entry level solicitor in the UK only does that because they know their chances for even greater than middle class income improve with time; entry level solicitors are paid more than entry level barrister, but a top pair barrister earns exponentially more than the highest paid solicitors. It's the same reason people pursue an MD instead of an RN; they can afford the extra time in order to reap greater long term economic and social benefits. Nobody whose chief concern at 18 is rent and food is going to think, what I really should do is wait six years to get a residency. Does your hypothetical architect also work night shifts to eat? Most of them don't, statistically, because they're largely middle class to begin with, and so the idea of having a job is more real to them than the reality of it. It's why they'd hate to be a minimum wage worker too, even if it meant they got free education to be a doctor. Because their motivation is not a deep desire to be an architect regardless of pay. It's about maintaining the lifestyle they are accustomed to and complaining like women about how the world owes them that much at least.

>> No.12042942

>>12042934
Sorry for the typos, my phone's autocorrect kicked in.

>> No.12042984

>>12042456
>>12042460
I also begrudgingly "participated" today. I hated it. It felt humiliating. This system is useless. Not because it doesn't go "my way," but because it only goes the way of the top players. The people who need to hang.

>> No.12042987

I want to experience everything. I feel so limited. I'm sick of being me.

>> No.12042994

Is anyone older than 25 here and still hasn't left the "teenage rebellious phase" yet? I don't think I'll ever support the status quo or "go with the flow."

>> No.12043002

>>12037963
Tbh haven't picked up a brush since June but my advice is to not try for a specific school or approach. It's good to have an idea of what you want to paint, but I advise against delving into Impressionism straight away. Teach yourself the basics, of course, and work your way towards the impressionists. They had at their disposal centuries of western (and non-western, for that matter) art techniques, they didn't just up and decide "hmm, i'd like to paint like this" as if by a whim.

>> No.12043038

>>12043002
This. If he's really serious I'll suggest something like this https://oldmasters.academy/ to get a good understanding on what impressionists were trying to do

>> No.12043064
File: 8 KB, 225x225, edge.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12043064

>>12042994
I've always had a little kick to me which doesn't quite allow me to effortlessly thrive in this spineless culture of conformity. I haven't stopped liking punk music, or the fuck you ethos, even if it has metamorphosed into a more sophisticated expression over the years.

The way I see it I have legitimate reasons for being angry and for rejecting societal norms. But that doesn't give me license to rob on the street or take dumps in the middle of the road. As you mature civilization gets its tendrils wrapped so tightly around you that short of becoming an criminal or deviant you have to be a very boring and dispirited person indeed to go along with this charade.

>> No.12043074

>>12043002
Sounds sensible. I'm absolutely terrible at any drawing-type activity so I imagine I'll be grinding the basics for quiet a while.

>>12043038
I don't really want to imitate the impressionists per se, that's just the style that's always been most moving to me. Mostly I just want to learn a visual art.

>> No.12043079

James Joyce was a funny little man i can't believe I waited this long to start reading his work, Dubliners is next

>> No.12043080

>>12043074
I completely understand. It's getting a hang of the lines and value shapes and color harmonies that can push you to drop it off completely. But I'm telling you, it is well worth it.

>> No.12043082

>>12042994
The concept of a "teenage rebellious phase" is constructed by the upper class to lead you to believe that disliking their rule over you is just some sort of childhood naivete. They say this in hopes that you will eventually accept their subjugation.

>> No.12043090

>>12043082
This desu
Well as long as you're rebelling against sensible things not just for the sake of rebelling

>> No.12043095

>>12043080
Thanks man. Do you happen to know of a good introductory resource?

>> No.12043124

>>12043095
I actually began by reading some Albrecht Dürer's "Four Books on Measurement" and "Four Books on Human Proportions". It helped me get a good sense for the geometric aspects of painting, but mainly point perspective. Besides that I would watch videos of people who either copied other's works - which I would then copy - or the few generous souls on Youtube who had full length courses devoted to art basics. Sadly, I cannot remember any specifically, but I'd imagine you'd have to dig around a little to find the worthwhile introductions.

>> No.12043171

>>12043090
Yes, obviously there's a point when it becomes unhelpful. Rebellion for the sake of it certainly exists.

>> No.12043183
File: 323 KB, 1000x1422, 1462107001968.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12043183

I've really fallen behind on my Japanese practice. I seem to have lost all motivation to go over anything that isn't basic greetings or their fucked up alphabet. I try to remind myself that I want to make a career of teaching over there, but then I remember that there are plenty of successful people that started off there with zero language skills.

>> No.12043189

>>12043183
Invest in adderall to get over these first few months. I've found that it is easier to ween yourself off of over-the-counter amphetamines than to find the willpower to learn a language.

>> No.12043196

I hate having ADHD. I don't use it as an excuse as much as a descriptor of the unusual set of traits I have. My in class retention is virtually 0% for anything concerning a process to be repeated outside of class (basically any Stem beyond rote memorization) and my time management and ability to follow schedules are garbage. I try so hard to improve myself, but it's incredibly demoralizing to have my success and grades determined more by petty shit than my intellectual capacity and knowledge gained. And now I've wasted 3 precious hours of the night on 4chan when I have more due this week than I could possibly finish.

>> No.12043207

>>12043064

I poop in a toilet, but I know what you mean.

>> No.12043210
File: 322 KB, 1000x1420, 1462107066896.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12043210

>>12043189
>Doing drugs
I plan on throwing myself into every local bar and restaurant in whatever town I'm placed in and attempt to strike up conversation with people in my broken Tarzan speak until I'm fluent enough to have a meaningful conversation. My hope is by studying now I can shave time off of that awkward transition period.

>> No.12043215

>>12043090

What do you consider worth rebelling against?

>> No.12043225

>>12043183
>>12043210

I am here right now and there are people that got here with either zero or very low japanese proficency that have lived here for more than 10 years.

But, by that same token the people that seem to have the worst time are the ones who are unwilling to make the effort to learn the language. Also it didn`t line up with their "anime dream" of Japan.

>> No.12043234

>>12043225
Yeah please tell me you're not learning some nip tongue just so you don't have to look at subtitles anymore.

>> No.12043239

>>12043234
I don`t really watch anime. I use Japanese mainly for communicating with people at work and occasionally socialising. Also, obvious everyday stuff.

>> No.12043246

>>12043225
>>12043234
No, one of the things that pissed me off the most about the Japanese course I took in college where the sheer quantity of fags that treated it like anime club. I find their culture legitimately interesting, but it's hard to talk about with coming across as a weeb

>> No.12043288

>>12043246
Nice. Are you still taking courses now? If so, try your damnedest to find a kindred spirit in the class and work with them.

>> No.12043310

>>12043288
Sadly no. I graduated more than a year ago and because I was busy working towards a certification in the states I passed all of my classes through brute memorization. If I had a time machine I might have just said fuck it and moved over their straight out of college.

>> No.12043327

>>12043310
That's a problem I encountered too with language classes: memorization. I never felt like I actually learned any of the grammar and syntax but could cram it in and memorize efficiently. Of course, this was ancient Greek, not Japanese, which I imagine is way harder.

>> No.12043358

>>12043310
I majored in Japanese Studies and Asian Studies at university. So i had my fair share of classes.

To be honest there really isn`t anywhere to take classes where I live and any classes i end up finding are for beginners level. Also even if I could I don`t know if I would have the time to be honest.

At this point I just try to get people to explain stuff to me if I don`t understand or I look the word up later. This can be difficult with grammar though.

>> No.12043453

>>12038543
Even if Christianity seems like a meme faith you should definitely read some Francis Chan he's one of the last few christian authors still writing with a sincere sense of awe and love that even if he doesn't make you believe in religion he'll at least help you see how significant your role truly is in the grand scheme of the universe.

>> No.12043540

I'm away to finish my bachelors degree and I honestly don't want a job in the field. Maybe should have spent these years developing other skills because its been a massive fuck about, and only now is it getting serious. Want to make a short movie but I have no friends with enough energy to help me realise it.

>> No.12043549
File: 472 KB, 720x715, 1537103967890.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12043549

I want to leave my old life behind and open a bar, where the only music that plays is progressive, synthwave and electronic, but I know that it's probably going to fail and close in the first year after opening it. And that's just the story of my life. I have no ambition because every time I think of doing something, I can just imagine how it's going to crash and burn and how it's going to ruin my life, even though it's already pretty bad.

>> No.12043570

>>12043549
Isn't it better to try and fail than to never do anything?

>> No.12043573

>>12043570
Every time I tried to do something serious, it failed and I felt awful, especially when I was laughed at or yelled at. Maybe it's lack of talent, or lack of motivation, or lack of knowledge, of I'm just retarded. Now I'm afraid to try doing anything again ant it has completely crippled me.

>> No.12043813

>>12040936
>>12040802
Faggots.

>> No.12043825

My anhedonia treatment progress is coming along I'm up to the knees in mud. I had it all set: Two months ago, my mother got a new job, and so I could finally sign on to her insurance to get some TMS procedures done. I waited the two full months for the insurance to come into effect, with my card just about to be shipped in the mail, only for her to be fired this Friday due to transportation issues arriving to work. It really is pathetic how this country traps the poor, how we send out the message that if you haven't got a phone and a car and a nice set of clothes then you can go fuck yourself. My father hasn't held a job longer than a month in about 15 years, and given that this is the second or third recent firing for my mother due to this issue, I feel as if my family's doomed to poverty. In fact, if I finish my degree I will likely be the first degree-holder in my family unless my cousin gets hers first. And I feel the heat now tickling my bum getting me to double down on my studies, or rather double at all, since their fate awaits me as well if I don't get it together.

In the meantime, what about the anhedonia? Well, since I've finally got an actual bedroom recording setup in my room, perhaps now is the time to give back to that collection of bizarre and beautiful music that has comforted me through these past few years, which only someone right in the thick of it has the guidance to make. That would be neat, yeah? I have zero connections to any musicians so I may just stick it up on Bandcamp and call it a day. Well, we'll see. That's all for now.

>> No.12043938

I just finished another book about an "outsider" who is despooked. Before that I finished Catcher in the Rye. I must admit that I feel a bit of sorrow after finishing a book I particularly enjoy. Some books I will stop reading before the end so I don't feel as bad.

Are there any good "outsider" books you guys could recommend?

>> No.12043944

not another word

>> No.12043963

I'm stupid. I'm just smart enough to see how stupid I am. I can touch the knowledge other people have created, but I'll never make anything new like that. I can see the light, but I'll never touch it. Chickens trying to fly

>> No.12044032

>>12043963
Then be the best chicken you can, anon. If you're lucky, maybe someone will eat you for Christmas.

>> No.12044386

>>12043189
How do you get adderall? Sorry for the dumb quesiton.

>> No.12044398

>>12037422
Islam is paganism

>> No.12044463

I think I am actually autistic. I can't stop thinking about useless details and be depersonalised by them. I am alright all day until around noon when my brain stops filtering the obvious and I start having the dumbest thoughts and can't read or speak to anyone. Some of these thoughts are : everything is made of humans, including our language, which includes a human in almost every sentence, why are books all about characters appearing out of nowhere and going places and doing stuff, how do I visualise this book without seeing only 2 people talking? why are there no more words in our language? Only when I'm drunk I can look at the world the same way I did before thoughts like these happened to me.

>> No.12044476

The drugs have won the drug war. Unajusted, semi succesfull millenials are doing drugs weekly, not heroin but weed, booze party drugs, to numb the pain of post modern world lacking great meaningfull narrations. Surrounded by overstimulation, escapism in video games tv shows, the fake hapiness of social media, we are going insane in a world that became impossible to comprehend.

>> No.12044606

I admire the Chinese government, it's outplaying the west both diplomatically and economically. Our democracy and liberty is easily being exploited by foreign powers sowing dissent and division. I hope the EU unites under one strong leader and reclaim the mantle of world hegemony.

>> No.12044632

Just saw her this morning. when i was starting to get out of the hole after half a year. Im pathetic and weak. I would love to see myself as a man but i cant.

>> No.12044654

>>12037422
which of Yukio Mishimaʻs books should i read first, is there any order, i know they arent connected but is there an building sequential ideas that i wont understand if I read in any order

>> No.12044759

>>12042840
Well, that's a major loss for non-fiction.
Might as well just do that in my modded sims4, i mean how pathetic my life can get at this point.

>> No.12045141

I've noticed that women actually tend to have more hair on their face then men who shave because men shave off their coarse facial hair which takes away the very fine body hair as well but women usually don't bother because they only have the fine body hair.

>> No.12045159

I’ve had a splitting headache for the past three days and don’t know if it’s just a particularly bad expression of my normal headaches or something is seriously wrong.

>> No.12045262

>>12045141
I've known women who shave the fine hair off their faces, though.

Obviously some don't need to, but I don't think it's unusual.

>> No.12045673
File: 97 KB, 518x501, why.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12045673

All I feel looking at those stars is a wish for summer to go on forever

>> No.12045964
File: 95 KB, 360x360, 1539633755556.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12045964

>>12045673
And for it to not get dark at 5 PM

>> No.12045978

>>12045673
Summer sucks, it's too hot, it's the least aesthetic season, the media has memed it into being a time of play and enjoyment when really everyone's just sweltering and bored, it's just awful