/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.12017431]

>pull up to local library, tip the valet
>right away inside the door there is a homeless person asking for change
>quote him the lyric of Smashmouth’s All Star
>he claps and lets me in
>I get inside and sit in the quiet section
>stupid man in a rascal won’t stop clapping, he must have just finished a book
>go over to the video games section
>play super smash bros. with some homeless people
>decide to rent Dante’s Inferno video game version Book + video game + pizza + cookies combo
>have to pay extra for drink
>have to tip the waiter a 20% minimum
>didn’t like the service but the waiter has a gun in a holster so I decide to obey
>decide to leave early
>valet has smoked a fat one in the car

I’m never going to the library again

[Anonymous No.12017434]

>open the door
>get on the floor
>everybody walk the dinosaur

[Anonymous No.12017441]

>go to local library to drop off my vote by mail ballot
>it's closed
>sign on door says they open at 9 am
>it's 9:01 am
>get a breakfast burrito from the place across the street
>go home

[Anonymous No.12017445]

>>12017441
>to drop off my vote
cringe and bluepilled

[Anonymous No.12017450]

I can’t stop laughing

[Anonymous No.12017489]

>>12017445
>not voting

[Anonymous No.12017492]

>>12017489
Never have, never will

[Anonymous No.12017494]

>>12017492
>rejecting your active influence in the government of which you live
Loser

[Anonymous No.12017498]

>>12017494
I don't care what happens to my country. It's beyond repair and being a citizen means nothing. I feel stateless, really.

[Anonymous No.12017499]

>>12017498
Where do you live

[Anonymous No.12017502]

>>12017494
Regular voters are too predictable. There's a reason why turnout determines elections. It's because unknown factors are the most powerful.
By not voting and saving your wildcard vote for some point in the future you are exponentially increasing it's power.

[Anonymous No.12017503]

>>12017499
USA

[Anonymous No.12017531]

>>12017503
Your country is fine. Stop consuming alarmist media.

[Anonymous No.12017551]

>>12017531
I don't watch or read news anymore. No point.

[Anonymous No.12017574]

>>12017551
based.

[Anonymous No.12017586]

>Finally got an invite to the Novelist's Guild (Romancier-Club)
>Had to present a thousand word essay on the presence of aristotelian bology in Lovecraftian horros as presented in Infinite Jest, according to Rupi Kaur (In ten minutes)
>Pass with a B- (whew)
>charged $20 per word for being single (no singles policy)
>Passed the penis inspection but had to suck the valet's dick without getting hard to prove I'm not gay (I'm not)
>My falconette (lisa) was hungry so I had to buy some dead mice for her, which were of the halal variety because of the inclusiveness and diversity agendas. I tipped the cashier another $20 , just like I did the penis inspector.
>Got inside the lbrary, greeted the receptionist and asked for a library card
>She told me to contact the manager
>An hour later I found the manager after traversing thousand-page tomes to find the secret room number of his five-minute temporary office
>He berates me for being late and then hands me a form
>I'm sweaty and delirious at this point and Lisa is cawing loudly and I have almost no money left
>Figure I'll take advantage of the free food at the guild and write a bestseller here in three months and get rich and finally be free
>"...And attach ze passport-size photo here"
>mfw I have no face

[Anonymous No.12017603]

>>12017551
Also you don't need to read anything to understand it. You can feel it and experience it. This country has no identity anymore, not even a civic one. It's just a landmass. Being American means you are an atom on this landmass. It means nothing.