[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/lit/ - Literature

View post   
File: 77 KB, 534x800, a book you faggot.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179077 No.1179077 [Reply] [Original]

IS YOUR BODY FUCKING READY?

NO, IT'S FUCKING NOT READY FOR THE LONG HARD DICK OF THE GOD DAMN GREAT PIMP-SLAPPIN, COCK MONGLING GATSBY. YOU FUCKING FAGGOTS.

SHIT, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW GOOD THIS BOOK IS. IT'S LIKE LIQUID DICKS. THEY MAKE YOU READ THIS BOOK IN SCHOOL SO YOU DON'T GROW UP TO BE A FUCKING FAILURE. I HEARD GATSBY IS SO FUCKING HOT THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND OFFERED TO CLEAN THE CUM OFF HIS DICK WITH THE ROYAL FAMILY'S FUCKING HANDKERCHIEF. SHIT. AFTER YOU READ THIS BOOK IT'S ALMOST LIKE YOUR ANUS IS SPREAD BY THE INTANGIBLE DICK OF GATSBY.

NOT TO MENTION HOW FUCKING USEFUL THIS BOOK IS. SHIT, IT'S NOT EVEN THAT FUCKING LONG. YOU READ IT, YOU FINISH IT, AND SUDDENLY YOU CAN DO FUCKING ANYTHING. READ THIS AND ANY ESSAY QUESTION ON THE SATS BECOMES EASIER THAN YOUR FUCKING MOM. SHIT, IMAGERY EVERYWHERE. YOU CAN COMPARE AND CONTRAST ANYTHING TO THE GENTLE YET ROCK HARD APPARATUS THAT IS THE PENIS OF THE GREATEST PIMP GATSBY. FUCK ALL YOUR OTHER BOOKS, YOUR ESSAYS, YOUR POEMS, YOUR SHORT STORIES. THE SHADOW THE GREAT GATSBY CASTS OVER EVERY COLLECTION OF WORDS EVER IS SO FUCKING BIG EVEN NARUTO DON'T BELIEVE IT. EVERY FAMOUS PERSON IN HISTORY HAS READ THE GREAT GATSBY, THAT'S HOW MUCH OF AN INFLUENCE IT HAS ON PEOPLE. ATTILA LOOKED UP TO GATSBY LIKE A FATHER FIGURE. ROBESPIERRE WAS INSPIRED BY HIS UNWAVERING COURAGE AND DEVOTION TO HIS FRIENDS. THE GREAT GATSBY WAS NIXON'S FIRST BOOK. FUCK.

GET OFF THE FUCKING INTERNET AND GO READ THE GREAT GATSBY YOU CUNT.

>> No.1179082

You seem awfully interested in dicks.

>> No.1179081
File: 7 KB, 240x240, chuck norris.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179081

>>1179077
>>1179077
>>1179077
>>1179077

>> No.1179085

>>1179077
Mr. Skenyon???

>> No.1179093

>>1179085

WHO THE FUCK IS THAT?

>> No.1179096

I've already read this but for some reason now I really want to suck a dick...

>> No.1179098

>>1179093
He was an English teacher from my high school. He fucking loved the Great Gatsby. You don't even know how much, caps guy. For a second I was convinced you were him.

>> No.1179105

>>1179098

WELL SHIT I AIN'T HIM BUT HE SOUNDS LIKE A TRUE BRO. MAN OR WOMAN, BLACK OR WHITE, CATHOLIC OR JEW, HUMAN OR NOT, EVERYONE WANTS A PIECE OF GLORIOUS GATSBY.

>> No.1179112

>>GET OFF THE FUCKING INTERNET AND GO READ THE GREAT GATSBY YOU CUNT.

Considering that it's out of copyright, can't I just stay on the fucking internet and read The Great Gatsby?

>> No.1179118

>>1179112

NO, YOU FOOL. THE INVISIBLE FORCE OF GATSBY'S DICK CAN ONLY PENETRATE YOUR VIRGIN ANUS WHEN YOU HOLD A COPY IN YOUR FUCKING HANDS. IT'S LIKE FUCKING 99 CENTS AT A USED BOOKSTORE YOU JEW. JESUS CHRIST.

>> No.1179197

bump for Gatsby

>> No.1179206

hahahaha I'm gonna read Gatsby now. You are very persuasive.

>> No.1179211

I also liked the book.

>> No.1179223

Alright, I'll give it a reread. You're one convincing motherfucker, OP.

>> No.1179242

THAT'S WHAT I LIKE TO HEAR. GOD DAMN. THERE'S REALLY NOTHING QUITE LIKE READING THE GREAT GATSBY FOR YOUR OWN PLEASURE, RATHER THAN BEING FORCED BY SOME FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER.

IT'S LIKE RECEIVING A SWEET GATSBY'S DICK IN YOUR ASS WITH LUBE AND A CONDOM, RATHER THAN HIM RAPING FAST AND HARD WHILE USING YOUR BLOOD AND TEARS AS A LUBRICANT.

>> No.1179241

if only my school used this technique to get people to read.

Buying this book tomorrow.

>> No.1179253

>>1179242
But blood and tears make the experience more enjoyable well for me at least

>> No.1179264

>>1179118
Ahahahahahaaaa I love you.

>> No.1179275
File: 10 KB, 323x269, 1279510642530.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179275

I read all the caps posts in Randy Savages voice

>> No.1179299

what a coincidence, just finished reading it for the first time yesterday.

terrific book indeed. got a lot of studying to do around it, though... i'm sure a lot of the symbolism escaped me.

>> No.1179301

by the way, what is mr. caps lock's take in the significance of the owl-eyed man to the story? why is he the only one to attend the funeral at the end?

>> No.1179308

not only is OP an immature twat, the book is over-hyped to the point where I want to cry every time I hear a tard scream GATSBYGATSBYGATSBYGREATGATSBY

no. Readers, consider it as an option- but do not expect anything more than a hyped melodrama appealing primarily to americans

>> No.1179309

>>1179301

For the same reason that he's the only person in the story---including Nick Carraway---who bothers to pull a book off the shelf in Gatsby's library (and notices that the pages are uncut and thus nobody's ever read or looked through them).

90 years later, Owl-Eyes would be posting on /lit/. ( Although, no offense to OP, he probably wouldn't use all caps.)

>> No.1179316

fuckin lol'd

what has been heard cannot be unheard

as for Gatsby, its prose is excellent, but not the most interesting story

>> No.1179328

whoops:
>>1179316
is in reference to
>>1179275

>> No.1179331

>>1179309
>
For the same reason that he's the only person in the story---including Nick Carraway---who bothers to pull a book off the shelf in Gatsby's library (and notices that the pages are uncut and thus nobody's ever read or looked through them).

Uh, doesn't Owl Eyes drunkenly marvel at the fact that they're actual books opposed to decorative pieces? I don't remember Nick fucking with the books either; I remember him being dragged in their by Jordan.

>> No.1179336

>>1179308

WHY ARE YOU SO UPSET, YOU COCK SUCKING FAGGOT? IS GATSBY'S DICK TOO LONG FOR YOU?

>> No.1179366

>>1179308
>do not expect anything more than a hyped melodrama appealing primarily to americans

>Top 100 Books of the 20th Century
>Here's the top 100 according to a survey carried out by Waterstones and Channel 4 Television, in the UK.
>12. The Great Gatsby. F. Scott Fitzgerald

>The top 100 books by www.telegraph.co.uk
>22. The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald

>> No.1179386

>>1179366
>dealing with the american dream
Otherwise, it's just a pretty average drama. The depth isn't particularly there

>>1179336
>raging mad

>> No.1179388

>>1179386

NO JUST UPSET.

>> No.1179405

>>1179386
I proved it wasn't just Americans that the novel appealed to. It's always on UK lists of greatest novels.

>> No.1179422
File: 2.13 MB, 700x2987, gatsbysm.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179422

>>1179077
[applause]
>>1179308
If you look outside your window, you might just glimpse the tail end of the point flying past you, laughing all the way.

>> No.1179434
File: 25 KB, 640x400, I DROO U A PICSHURE.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179434

>>1179264

I LOVE YOU TOO.

LIKE REALLY I DO ANONYMOUS. SHIT. HERE. THIS PICTURE IS FOR YOU. OVER 9000 HOURS IN MICROSOFT PAINT ETC.

>> No.1179477
File: 41 KB, 548x445, umecalvino.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179477

>>1179434
I LOVE YOU TOO

ERRY DAY OF MAH LIIIIIIIIIIIFE

>> No.1179489

>>1179434

Capsguy is actually...Capsgirl?

DUN DUN DUN

>> No.1179524

I haven't read this, yet. I was just thinking about it yesterday, though, so I guess now's the time.

This shit better be godly, Caps-lock Guy.

>> No.1179538
File: 157 KB, 1280x720, ME BITCH.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179538

>>1179489

IS THERE A FUCKING PROBLEM? I WILL SMASH YOUR HEAD IN BETWEEN MY THIGHS LIKE A PRINTER SMASHES WORDS ONTO PAPER, OR THE WAY GATSBY'S DICK SMASHES INTO PURE INNOCENT ASSHOLES.

PIC RELATED, IT'S ME IN REAL LIFE.

>> No.1179547

my admittedly poor attempt at imitation:

>>>ck/2265575

>> No.1179549

>>1179547
>>/ck/2265575
wtf is the syntax here

>> No.1179551

>>>/ck/2265575

>> No.1179552

>>>/ck/2265575

>> No.1179556

>>1179549

>>>/ck/2265575

IT'S THREE JAWNS BEFORE THE BOARD AND NUMBER. THE MORE YOU KNOW. ALSO, GATSBY LURKED /CK/. I APPROVE.

>> No.1179612

>>1179556
>IT'S THREE JAWNS BEFORE THE BOARD AND NUMBER
>THREE JAWNS BEFORE THE BOARD
>THREE JAWNS
>JAWNS

<3

>> No.1179626
File: 16 KB, 252x244, 1284153862083.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179626

>>1179612

THE PHILADELPHIA SLIPS IN SOMETIMES.

SHIT.

AS MUCH AS I LOVE THE MOTHERFUCKING FABULOUS GATSBY, SOMETIMES I CAN'T HELP BUT WISH HIM AND HIS FAGGOT FRIENDS WISHED IN WEST PHILADELPHIA. WEST PHILADELPHIA > WEST EGG. I'M SURE WE CAN ALL COME TO A GENTLEMANLY AGREEMENT ON THIS FACT.

>> No.1179629

>>1179626

FUCK I WROTE WISHED INSTEAD OF LIVED.

I AM A GIGANTIC FAGGOT THAT ENJOYS BEING RAPED BY GATSBY'S 13.7 INCH GLASS DILDO.

>> No.1179887

>>1179629

Well, don't have to be a gigantic fagot to enjoy that. Gatsby's the one no-sexuality-confusion hetro man crush everyone gets.

>> No.1179895

Didn't Nick and Gatsby have sex in the book? Nick wakes up at Gatsby's, puts his clothes on, and walks out? It's subtle but clear that they bumped uglies.

>> No.1179905
File: 1.08 MB, 297x168, uknow.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1179905

>>1179895
>mfw

>> No.1179932

>>1179895

NIGGER WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I'M PRETTY SURE THEY DIDN'T HAVE SEX, SINCE GATSBY HAD ALREADY IMPREGNATED NICK WHEN THEY FIRST MET, JUST BY LOOKING AT HIM. SHIT, THAT'S HOW FUCKING MANLY GATSBY IS. HE GETS MEN PREGNANT BY LOOKING AT THEM. FUCK ME.

>> No.1180014

I read this book in high school. I didn't much care for it; for whatever reason, it made me sleepy, but I still considered it a good book on its own merits.

>> No.1181886

Fine, OP! You convinced me; I'll fucking read it!

>> No.1181923

I finished it on the bus this morning. Am cry.
I love the lines about his smile though, they make me happy