/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.11583483]

Post your novel ideas. It's not like they're going anywhere.

[Anonymous No.11583761]

Frustrated writer tries and tries to finish his first novel, but chronic writer's block defeats him. Suicides.

[Anonymous No.11583987]

>>11583483
Chef accidentally orders shaving cream instead of whipped cream on the day he has to make dessert for the king.

[Anonymous No.11584036]

>>11583761

Dave, stahp

[Anonymous No.11584101]

A novel about a virologist/epidemiologist who is recruited to head a team investigating a virus which has seemingly infected everyone on earth. The virus is seemingly harmless, as it does not cause any apparent symptoms, hence how easily it spread. However, it is highly mutagenic, and displays some traits not seen in other viruses. The protagonist is brought in to replace a former colleague who had to leave the lab under mysterious circumstances.

The novel will be presented as a series of field updates/progress noted written in a highly formal scientific manner, complete with footnotes, references, and an index.

Over the course of the novel the progress notes grow increasingly personal and paranoid in nature. The protagonist becomes highly suspicious of his employers, their motivations, and grows obsessive over the personal lives of the scientists and students working for him. The novel also explores his general frustrations about the nature of bureaucracy and academia.

I don't have an ending yet, but the main question of the novel is whether or not the protagonists increasingly unstable nature is due to his own inherent psychoses or if the virus is altering his perceptions of reality as a means of evasion.

[Anonymous No.11584152]

>>11583483

The adventures of an exorcist who uses the technique of kill himself in a possessed house, beating the ghost to death, and then getting resurrected like Lazarus. No one knows what the hell happens to the ghosts.

[Anonymous No.11584156]

>>11584152
*killing, damn you hands

[Anonymous No.11585183]

>>11583483
A recollection of my amorous encounters.

inb4 blank book

[Anonymous No.11585308]

>>11584101
That's not bad.

[Anonymous No.11585363]

A beautiful but for some accountable reason totally overlooked young woman is assigned to interview or work for (haven't decided yet) a handsome wealthy brooding man with a seemingly dark secret. The man is standoffish at first but gradually begins to see the young woman's true worth. There follows a series of increasingly intense sadomasochistic sex scenes in which the man is dominant at all times yet also solicitous towards her (that's the tricky part, very hard to write convincingly). She is never actually harmed during these encounters. In fact, they open up new worlds to her and unleash her true spiritual potential. Am undecided whether it should end with them getting married or not. Perhaps the woman's spirit is too free to settle for bourgeois conventions like marriage. Also, my publisher, Schlomo Shekelstein, says that my white female fanbase needs to be discouraged from reproducing and raising functional children in a healthy family, so maybe I'll have my protagonist "grow as a person" and become a lesbian who adopts a Somali child.

[Anonymous No.11585380]

A retelling of The Wizard of Oz in a dystopian near future - the characters becoming augmented, amputated, mind's altered - a statement on the future of human augmentation and eugenics

[Anonymous No.11585556]

>>11585380
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Return_to_Oz

[Anonymous No.11585575]

>>11583987
read that as 'Chief', thinking police.

[Anonymous No.11585631]

A young knight in a LOTR style fantasy world teams up with a tsundere princess who kicks ass. He's always been in love with her, but she can't stand him. They travel across the land to stop a great evil and eventually form an effective partnership and grow to care for one another. The story ends with the great evil defeated and the knight severely injured. The princess saves him and tearfully confesses her feelings over his unconscious body, after which the two get together.

[Anonymous No.11585638]

>>11583483
A postmodern story meant to critique the effects of exposition. A delusional angry schizophrenic 13 year old writes a disorganized diary. The text switches in an out of reality and fiction, flipping back and forth when one triggers the other, making the text hard to fit into a cohesive definite timeline. Obsessed with girly imagery, the book is written in a rash and obtuse post-structuralist style.

The book finishes with a dictionary, where she gives definitions which are at first sight nonsensical but connect to the real meaning through a labyrinth of misunderstanding.

[Anonymous No.11585644]

>>11585631
Please don't write this.

[Anonymous No.11585667]

>>11583483
I'm going to steal the declaration of independence.

[Anonymous No.11585702]

>>11585644
Too late. It's being printed by the tens of thousands right now.

[Anonymous No.11585717]

Thinking about a novella in which a man wakes up one morning to find he has been transformed into a huge insect. His family is horrified and rejects him. He dies of a broken heart.

[Anonymous No.11585730]

Anyone know the status on this? Last I heard it was being edited.

[Anonymous No.11585939]

A man gets lost at sea. After days of floating, he washes ashore a tiny island. Upon investigating the island he finds a small hole right at its center. He crawls in and emerges the other side in 1960's Los Angeles.
Then he crawls back in and kills himself or some shit.

[Anonymous No.11586012]

Snobbish but drug-addicted intellectual decides to finish his life in the tuscany based holiday home of his grand-father. As a sort of suicide letter he writes a long-winded confession to a woman he adresses as his sister. To make her a last sweet gift he sends her an authenthic autobiographic letter of a medieval italian saint to his secret aristocratic love affair (that never happened irl) which he pretends to have found in his grandfathers documents but that is actually fictitious and thought out by himself. He explains to her that he will send both letters rotatory because he doesn't want her to be sad about him too much (his suicide is not mentioned but slightly implied. While the autobiographic letter of the saint perfectly fits the known data and places he've been to, the reader will realize mistakes at some places and glaring similiarities to the writer himself and eventually find out that everything is a hoax when both narrations slowly begin to follow the same route and end with the writer not being able to tell the difference between his and the saint's life anymore.

[Anonymous No.11586061]

A loner decided to take the leap and finally buy a personal care robot. It's of course a beautiful woman who is pleasant, cheerful and caters to his pathetic r9k mentality, causing him to latch onto her and fall in love. Eventually it comes to light that the model is defective and there needs to be a mass recall, the guy believes that her love for him is genuine caused by the defect in her personality and refuses to turn her in. The story ends with her just smacking him over the head so hard he's killed instantly, because she's just a piece of malfunctioning hardware, not a real person.

[Anonymous No.11586449]

>>11584101
I’m interested

[Anonymous No.11586453]

>>11583483

Dragons arguing

[Anonymous No.11586457]

>>11585363
Literally 50 Shades of Gray

[Anonymous No.11586463]

>>11584101
Good idea but you'll butcher the readability if you write it with footnotes and all that shit

[Anonymous No.11586583]

>>11586457
She turns lesbo and adopts a niglet at the end?

[Anonymous No.11586589]

>>11586061
Ex Machina, basically

[Anonymous No.11586656]

>>11585363
Sounds familiar but gee, I just can't put my finger on it...

[Anonymous No.11586663]

>>11585730
I wish I knew. Apparently, the anon writing it is a massive fag, but the book itself sounds interesting.
Still waiting.

[Anonymous No.11586667]

a picture book about a cute little girls doing cute things

[Anonymous No.11586672]

>>11586667
Would read.

[Anonymous No.11586729]

>>11583761
>>11585638
tfw when this is actually something i'm working on 80k words in, first part. first three parts are titled according to the meme trilogy (pt1 - IJ, pt2 - GR, pt3 - Ulysses) and i haven't given a name to the last part yet.

[Anonymous No.11586738]

>>11586672
yeah, it has an actual market and is enjoyable and not too labor intensive to create assuming you split the artwork requirements up.

Unlike the pseudo-intellectual trash would be failed novelists would make knowing it would be poorly executed.

[Anonymous No.11586806]

>>11583483
A remnant group Nazis secretly establish underground colonies on the Moon. In the midst of their tunneling, they accidentally stumble upon an entrance to Hell, where they find Hitler, now fused onto the chest of what's basically a Cyber-Demon, in league with a small legion of demons. The Nazi remnants and the splinter group of demons then unite to stage a global assault on the Earth.