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/lit/ - Literature

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11342606 No.11342606[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

I've gotten my wife pregnant after two months of being married. Are there any books that help with pregnancy?

>> No.11342613

>>11342606
Better Never to Have Been: The Harm of Coming into Existence:

>> No.11342615

pregnancy is so fucking sexy holy shit

>> No.11342619

>>11342606
haha you're a retard

>> No.11342656

>>11342613
Thanks, but i'm not interested in antinatalism. Are there any books that help with having a safe and healthy pregnancy?

>> No.11342662

>>11342606
Like what kind of help? Books on polygamy?

>> No.11342672

>>11342656
the bible

>> No.11342674

>>11342662
Just books that give the most reliable advice and information for expectant moms and dads.

>> No.11342677

>>11342672
cringe

>> No.11342682

>>11342656
Are you in the USA? Get a midwife rather than an unnecessary cesarean. Then ask your midwife for suggestions, rather than a bunch of male shut-ins.

>> No.11342693

>>11342656
>I'm not interested in antinatalism
I see you are a hedonist. Just have your wife deal with the baby.

>> No.11342698

>>11342656
disgustingly selfish and deplorable

>> No.11342704

>>11342682
>Are you in the USA?
Yes.

>>11342682
>Get a midwife rather than an unnecessary cesarean. Then ask your midwife for suggestions
Thanks, but i can't. My wife wants to give birth at home rather than a hospital.

>> No.11342734

>>11342613
>>11342619
>>11342693
>>11342698
Chill out dudes... maybe OP is Chad, and his lucky son will spend his being rich and slaying pussy. His lucky daughter would be even luckier! Spend her life teasing cocks, getting paid to do nothing, and getting so much attention that she's worshiped by men and women alike.
In short, OP, I support your pregnancy but only if you are Chad.

>> No.11342764

>>11342704
What an odd response. No doctor is going to come to your house, but some midwives will. Even if you have an unassisted home birth, you should still go to a midwife during the pregnancy to get checked out.

>> No.11342802

>>11342764
>No doctor is going to come to your house, but some midwives will. Even if you have an unassisted home birth
I know. My wife insists on having a home birth to get unassisted. That's why i'm here to get reliable advice on what to do before and when it's time for the birth.

>> No.11342807

>>11342704
nevermind what i said man, you seem okay, but your wife is definitely a retard

>> No.11342848

>>11342802
Ha, no. You know why the pilgrim women kept dying all the time? They had their first birth at home unassisted. So unless your wife already had a bunch of kids with Chad and Jerome, this is a dumb plan. There is a good chance your wife and the kid die and you go to jail.

Be the man in the family, pick up your balls and tell your wife, "dearest, let's just go talk to this really fruity midwife/doula and she what she thinks, ok?" I'm paraphrasing, you can call her mistress or whatever you do.

>> No.11342862

>>11342848
Yeah, you guys are definitely not going to help me. Thanks anyway.

>> No.11342871

>>11342862
>he tries to save his wife's life
>he tries to save his child's life
>"you guys are not going to help me"
case is closed, boys. OP is tarded.

>> No.11342891

The Fifth Child by Doris Lessing

>> No.11342894
File: 84 KB, 500x500, 2362456245.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11342894

The Scramble for Africa: White Man's Conquest of the Dark Continent from 1876 to 1912 by Thomas Pakenham

>> No.11342901

>>11342871
It isn't that i don't want your help, but my wife is set on giving birth at home unassisted. I just want books which give advice on having a home birth unassisted.

>> No.11342911

>>11342606
i hope this isnt real because the fact you asked 4chan for parenting advice does not bode well for your future child

>> No.11342915

>>11342901
Just watch some birth videos on heavy-r . com it doesn't seem that complicated

>> No.11342925

>>11342901
>my wife is set on giving birth at home unassisted
It's not just about her and her fee fees. Your wife is about to give birth to another human being, which is always a risky process, both for her AND the child. Tell her to grow the fuck up and act like a rational adult. Jesus fucking Christ, first world primitivist retards should be gassed, what a waste of oxygen.

>> No.11342930

>>11342901
I guess first read the wikipedia page.
Unassisted home birth had "a maternal mortality rate 97 times higher than the state average.

According to the president of the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, Thomas Purdon, twenty percent of all previously normal pregnancies turn into complications and high-risk situations during the course of labor that could result in serious adverse outcome to mother and baby, including death."
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unassisted_childbirth

The odds are even worse for first time pregnancies.

This is a bad plan.

>> No.11342931

>>11342606
A personal matter by oe

>> No.11342944

>>11342901
This is a literature board you fucking retard

>> No.11342947

>>11342911
I didn't ask for parenting advice though. I asked for books which provide information on how to handle pregnancy and home birth.

>> No.11342950

>>11342930
This but it doesn't matter. Wife is a doc, she had one of these kooks come in with her doula and a floppy blue baby. Wife got the baby back, and the lady started screaming at her not to stick her poison vaccines and ran away trailing blood from her snatch against medical advice.

Such is medicine among dirty hippy shits. Kid is doomed.

>>11342931
This even more so considering op is dooming his kid and wife.

>> No.11342955

>>11342947
That isn't literature, try /diy/ or /adv/ and post thread here

>> No.11342964

>>11342955
Okay thanks i guess.

>> No.11342978

>>11342606
The Fifth Child

>> No.11343125

>>11342606

Congrats OP

>> No.11343128 [DELETED] 

>>11342891

this

>> No.11343130

>>11342891
Kek

>> No.11343131
File: 658 KB, 687x1117, 1489743887000.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11343131

>>11342606

Just go on >>>/his/ and post a photo of Anne Frank, you'll get all the pregnancy and childbirth erotica you want.

>> No.11343909 [DELETED] 

>>11342615
This

>> No.11344067

>>11342734
I doubt OP is a Chad. If he's not rich then their kid is doomed to a life of mediocrity but let's hope they stay ignorant and don't notice

>> No.11344344
File: 13 KB, 318x437, 8524528.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11344344

>>11342606

>> No.11344347

>>11342656
literally ask any doctor, don't ask a board that don't know what it's like to have their dick warmed by a vagina let alone know what pregnancy is

most of them believe that traps aren't gay but you can't get a girly dude pregnant in the ass

>> No.11344366

>>11342901
> birth at home unassisted

Dude, I wish the best for you and your family - it's not impossible to give birth at home. But at the very least have someone on board who knows this process, don't go completely unassisted.

I get that hospitals are intimidating - I don't like them myself - and the comforts of your own home are always going to be appealing, but just please have someone professional involved like a midwife, just in case if there happens to be complications. Please just do that.

It's genuinely the truth that women are evolving now to have hips that are not as wide as they used to be because many more women are having C-sections rather than giving a vaginal birth, and although there's no real harm in that as long as there's the medical support on offer (my brother's fiancée went through a C-section because she's short, a bit chubby and the doctor said it would have been dangerous otherwise), but if you did it unassisted and something potentially went wrong you could be in serious trouble. It's not worth the risk, man.

When it comes closer to the time, your wife might also regret not going to hospital. My brother's fiancee kept suggestion to give a water birth or something like that but as she got closer to her time and felt the pain of contractions she just said she wanted to be pumped with drugs and have it taken out. Not saying every birthing experience is like this, but just a potential hypothetical that could complicate an unassisted home birth.

Have you spoken with a midwife or a health visitor about the issues and solutions for an unassisted house birth? I'm sure it's a more common way of birthing than we'd typically think and I'm sure there's advice they could give you. Whatever their advice, take it. It's going to be more useful than whatever a bunch of introverted incel nu-males on a Moroccan embroidery forum could suggest.

>> No.11345547

>>11344344

This

>> No.11346720 [SPOILER] 
File: 712 KB, 889x1216, 1529443266555.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11346720

Does /lit/ have any suggestions on good pregnancy erotica?

>> No.11346728 [SPOILER] 
File: 2.71 MB, 1050x1500, 1529443361318.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
11346728

>>11344366

God birth is so hot.

>> No.11346884

>>11344366

God this is my fucking dream. For me it's always Gadamer. I picture being Gadamer, this 95 year old motherfucker who eats philosophy berets for breakfast, and it coming out as a big scandal that I've banged three thousand twentysomething interns. I want to be an ancient philosophy sorcerer that everyone respects and sees as a kindly old harmless thinkin' guy and then shatter everyone's expectations by being caught with this century's young Hannah Arendt straddling my face in a broom closet. I want to be a five foot tall goblin with crazy-eyes like Sartre and have my equivalent of Beauvoir give posthumous interviews about how I was drowning in pussy in between writing my sixth and seventh book. Searle is the fucking man. I am going to eat ass and philosophize until I'm 250 years old. He proves the dream is still possible. We can still do it.

I wouldn't have gotten angry though. Half the fun of being a pervert is when they rightfully spurn you. You shouldn't get all petty about it and try for revenge. You should just put down your copy of Strauss' correspondence with Kojeve and make a V with your fingers and lick between it so she runs out of the room crying and no one believes her.

>> No.11347202

You can tell its young men in this thread because no one has said What To Expect When You're Expecting. It's the bible to pregnancy.

Jesus christ.