Write what's on your mind /lit/.

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Anonymous Sat Mar 17 00:58:41 2018 No.10853508 [Reply] [Original]

Write what's on your mind /lit/.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:00:47 2018 No.10853512 >>10853508 my qt milf boss called me cute at our office party. Feels good mane

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:04:54 2018 No.10853527 Social media is a cancer and has completely damaged social interaction

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:06:26 2018 No.10853530 >>10853527 true, and the worst lie we tell ourselves is that 4chan isn't social media

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:08:32 2018 No.10853542 >>10853530 Definitely, however it's a different animal than those of snapchat, instagram, facebook, and twitter which I think are the biggest problems

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:12:48 2018 No.10853553
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I want people to know I'm better than them, which is why I ensure they know what books I'm reading, or what music I'm hearing, and I'm always enraged whenever my delusions are proven false and someone reveals they consumed that piece of media far before me. If I'm not the first to do it, or the only one doing it, I become resentful. I'm a special snowflake, and I have no intention of changing. I want to sleep.

>>10853527
How so?

>>10853530
It's not. It's an online image board where you're anonymous. You have no loyalties here, and can stop coming here at any time you wanted.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:14:37 2018 No.10853564 >>10853508 I saw this cat on the front page of reddit. Now I assume that you go to reddit and therefore a fag

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:17:22 2018 No.10853576

>>10853553
>It's not. It's an online image board where you're anonymous. You have no loyalties here, and can stop coming here at any time you wanted.

but ur still doing the same thing as facebook and snapchat, bragging about how great u are, except here it's all anonymous so no one can call u out on your bullshit, it's basically social media for cowards

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:18:37 2018 No.10853582 >>10853553 You're just young and immature

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:19:35 2018 No.10853583 >>10853576 There's more depth to image boards (and social media as a whole) than just bragging about how great you are. You can still use social media in productive ways, and the same goes for online imageboards like 4chan. Don't be so narrow minded.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:20:37 2018 No.10853588 >>10853582 What's your point? I never said I wasn't.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:20:48 2018 No.10853589 >>10853583 /lit/ mostly for bashing jews, then some of us old timers come here to pose as intellectuals and brag about all the obscure old shit we read, it's nothing noble

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:23:13 2018 No.10853592 >>10853589 >us >we You're generalizing. Not everyone is you.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:26:05 2018 No.10853602

>>10853512
When I was a teenager, I had a summer job as an office assistant. The middle-aged lady I worked under was super nice and always told me how glad she was that I was around. On my last day, she got me this gift basket thing and said she'd miss me.
I masturbated furiously to the thought of her almost every night that summer. Still do, sometimes.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:32:04 2018 No.10853626 >>10853527 cancer is not the correct word its a virus, as in it spreads itself memetically and consumes whole fields of discourse permanently, turning them into vehicles for itself. the method of dispersion is you, so its not cancerous, but virulent

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:35:36 2018 No.10853639 My dog's feet are leaking.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:37:01 2018 No.10853644 I could of gone far in life but I decided not to. Looking back, I should of gone all the way.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:42:17 2018 No.10853676
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>>10853508
Wishing there was a way to cleanly scrub away my existence. I don't have the courage to off myself and watching that guy's mom's reaction after he an hero'd has deterred me quite a bit. I couldn't put my mother through such an ordeal. I'll have to wait at least 40 years before I do it and then there's still the issue of siblings...so many loose ends, it's all just so messy. To have never existed in the first place, that would be ideal.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:53:50 2018 No.10853710

Perhaps the reason productive hobbies are so difficult to commit to is because they generate very little pleasure at the start, whereas wasteful hobbies are most enjoyable at the start. In the long run, the former becomes much more enjoyable than the latter, but you have to have patience. I've got a PS4 right now, and I could platinum all my games, but that doesn't really mean anything. If I took out my guitar and spent that time practicing for a month, I'd be pretty damn good at a few things, and have something to build on. It's not a dead end.

It's irrational, then, spending all of my day on something I don't take seriously. I have to change.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 01:54:11 2018 No.10853712
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we are all connected through the medium of text. 4chan is the perfect collaborative book.

but then why am i uploading images? is my mind so culturebound to jpegs?

or is it so much better to be culturebound by language. maybe music and drawings and dance and sculpture would be better forms of communication. maybe forming collaborative online games would be better. i am a programmer after all.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:01:54 2018 No.10853736

>>10853553
>How so?
It's breeding narcissism and having your attention other places than the present most of the time.
I go onto snapchat or instagram and I see people posting boring pictures of the sky, like 4 people will have pictures up of the sky when it's pink. As if people can't walk five feet out their door and look at the sky themselves. Or they go out somewhere interesting and HAVE to post a pic, only for the fact they want people to know they're there.

I've been to dinner with people, and they genuinely cannot go 10 minutes without checking their shit. They constantly show me some uninteresting shit someone posted and I can hardly even fake interest. These people have nothing interesting to offer in a conversation.

I know I sound like I think I'm better than them all, but goddamn. Peoples reliance on their phones and their need of instant gratification from social media is ruining proper interaction. I recently stepped away from social media and now can't help but notice how much of an impact it has made

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:04:38 2018 No.10853747 >>10853710 I resonate with this. My friends are sitting near me playing Fortnite and I was just taking a break from practicing guitar by going on /lit/. I encourage you to always pick the more productive option, friend.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:04:48 2018 No.10853748 >>10853736 Is it true that people will ostracize you if you have no social media presence? I'm anxious of making friends in college for this reason.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:08:55 2018 No.10853770 >>10853712 Do not underestimate visual communication, anon Also, what language do you write?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:09:21 2018 No.10853771 >>10853508 I've recently had images of towers falling in my mind, not quite sure as to why.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:10:02 2018 No.10853773 >>10853748 Some people will. There's definitely people like you out there though, those who have no social media or at least place no importance on it. Don't be too anxious about it

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:11:22 2018 No.10853778

>>10853736
I agree. I can't stand the constant checking people do when I'm out with them. I got rid of my smartphone and it has helped me a lot in meeting new people and talking with them as well as staying in the moment.

>>10853748
Some people will give you shit for it, but others will find it really cool. After a brief explanation, people generally get on board.

Speaking of which, as an autist, this girl I've been seeing is wanting us to share a bottle of wine together and talk/get deep. She doesn't drink much, and thinks this would be a special occasion for her. This has potential, doesn't it, or am I looking into it too much?

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:12:32 2018 No.10853784

>>10853747
Do you ever think of becoming a (professional) musician? Not like topping the charts or anything, but recording an album or playing live shows. It seems like such a far-off dream, but it's totally possible as long as we try.
>>10853773
Appreciate the reassurance, thanks. Sometimes it feels like we live in a completely different world.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:16:34 2018 No.10853796

>>10853778
What phone do you use now? I still have a lot of reliance on my smartphone due to needing to always be responding to emails for work.

>am I looking into it too much?
She said she wants to drink wine and have a deep talk? Sounds promising to me. Although with girls I have a tendency to always get my hopes up and build things up in my head
I'd say just don't think about it too much and then when it happens just enjoy it for whatever it is

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:20:50 2018 No.10853807

my emotions are so incredibly volatile. i love somebody so much and if they don't reply to a text message, or frown slightly at something i say, i feel deeply sorry and depressed because i know i dont deserve them. then five seconds later if they smile at me or kiss me i feel ridiculously elated. we've been dating for six months now and none of this has been diluted at all. i feel like something is happening to me and i have no control over it at all

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:22:02 2018 No.10853809 >>10853778 that's a large amount of potential.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:29:42 2018 No.10853827 the other day this gay dude was sort of flirting with me and for the hell of it i flirted back, it was so much more fun that dealing with women, when women flirt it's just a fucking chore

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:30:19 2018 No.10853829
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>>10853796
I bought a LG flip phone at Walmart for 20 bucks. I need email for work too, but found that I wasn't really missing much. I can't stress enough how freeing it is. I practically forget about it from time to time. Another benefit is you don't have to text people as much, because they know it takes a long time with T9.

>>10853809
It sounds good to me, and I really like this girl, but I don't want to get my hopes up. I'm a dumb romantic at heart and make too much of a big deal out of little things.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:36:42 2018 No.10853848 >>10853829 I think a good stratagem could be to stumble into the grandiose while not going too forward. I'd say use this as an opportunity to test the waters of how compatible you both might be. Women love a man above his own bullshit.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:40:24 2018 No.10853862

i'm using solipsism as a defense mechanism because i'm such a weird neurotic off-putting autist with major unresolved speech issues that I have trouble with nearly every social situation and being overly cognizant of that fact only causes more stress for me. books for this feel?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:42:24 2018 No.10853873 >>10853827 that's because he has a male libido you were being a lazy bitch. remember you literally have to earn the right to fuck a woman >>10853862 Corpus Hermeticum read through a solipsist lens anon, do it

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:42:57 2018 No.10853876

there was a time when i was too fucking horny to even listen to Bae 2 by Young Bae cuz the chick on the cover would make me horny and i'd need to wack off, now i can't get horny anymore, i never used to be able to understand those fags who would try to fuck a chick and couldnt get hard, but if some chick tried to seduce me i doubt id get hard, id have to tell her i just wanted to be friends, i don't know what happened, my horniness is just gone, im not even mad its just weird like what happened

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:46:13 2018 No.10853886

>>10853873
>remember you literally have to earn the right to fuck a woman

but that's what i mean, it's a fucking chore, for what, to get a nut off, i can just fap if i need a nut, an orgasm is an orgasm to me, i used to give a fuck %1000 percent, but now i don't care, when i think back to the last time i fucked a chick its not like it was better than fapping

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:59:28 2018 No.10853921

>>10853886
I came really hard the last time I had sex anon, I also got really fucking hard too. I'm not satisfied with masturbation at all, I would really like to have sex with a good looking woman and I'm going to predict you will too in the near future. We're built to fuck women, they attract us in nearly every way imaginable. Pretending things are otherwise because its an inconvenience is not worth the loss of social skills. Just pick wisely

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 02:59:59 2018 No.10853923 i'm gonna get in bed and listen to an audiobook

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 03:01:11 2018 No.10853927 >>10853876 Do you use drugs? I've been masturbating more or less daily for about a decade and I'm still as horny as when I started the habit at fourteen. The only times I can't get hard are when I'm too drunk or fucked up to function properly.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 03:06:23 2018 No.10853940

>>10853921
last time i fucked the girl was so beautiful, maybe that was the problem, i fucked like some model tier chick and it was just like any nut, i mean i came hard cuz i hadnt fapped in ages, but suddenly i realized fucking hot chicks isn much different from fucking not that hot chicks which isnt that different from wacking off, idk man hopefully i'll get horny again some day, but it's springtime i should be jacking it every other day and staring at ass whenever i go outside, but its just not happening

its kinda cool tho because i can retire a lot sooner if i dont waste money on things to please women, and especially if i dont have to buy a big ass house for a bunch of kids, i cant just get some dinky condo in some midtier city and im fucking good to go

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 03:08:17 2018 No.10853945

>>10853927
i can get hard, but i mean i'd probably have to watch porn for a while or something, even just a couple years ago just talking to a hot chick and staring in her eyes id feel my dick start to stir, now there's just nothing, i dont use drugs anymore, im in shape, eat healthily, idk

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 04:09:06 2018 No.10854075 >>10853508 what if some guy got stranded on an uninhabited island, and when he tried to build a shelter, the trees and plants started to bleed human blood? That'd be pretty fucked up.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 05:16:29 2018 No.10854186

Am I the only one who has problems in finding people with similar personalities and interests? It seems that every male is able only to speak about football(which is almost a religion in my country) and every girl about Instagram and gossip shit. Everytime I read an interesting book, I have nobody to discuss with about it, except some guys on a Sardinian Casu marzu appreciation forum. I'd like a qt indie bookworm gf, but it seems only a mirage

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 07:05:10 2018 No.10854377

>>10853508
I’ve been really reflecting a lot lately, and I hope some anon will read this and give me advice or their thoughts on what has been building up in my mind.

I have been thinking about what is “worth it.” I guess I haven’t gotten super far because I mostly think of common things that I feel are a waste of time.

Paying attention to politics and the news/current events like gun control debate, transgender controversy, etc. feels useless and possibly even a harmful habit. If I vote in every single election for the rest of my life, at the end of my life the results would be the same as if I had never voted at all. One vote will never decide an election. Sure, if everyone thought this way, that would be a problem. But I’m not influencing everyone. I’m making a decision individually. Is it really worth it for me to get upset over some political disagreement with someone I know, or to have a sharp stance on something like gun control to the point that I rage at these walkouts happening? If I let an election ruin my day or even put me in a bad mood for months (as happens with many people I know) that’s not a good thing. I feel it’s emotional and intellectual energy wasted. I’m considering divorcing myself from it completely so that I can use that energy and focus on something more worthwhile.

Even film, which I used to love, feels mostly pointless to me. I used to want to watch all the great films, first as a pleb I watched the IMDb top 250, then I got into classic golden age Hollywood, then more art film, obscure (to normies) films like Jodorowsky, Tarkovsky, Bresson, Wim Wenders etc. even those I think are only marginally beneficial. And when it comes to the films lauded today, I can’t get behind them either, the writing in Blade Runner 2049 felt so basic to me, and they covered it up with long takes and James Turrell style sets. Manchester by the Sea was predictable to me beyond words. I no longer expect film to provide me with any sort of deeper truth for life. I’ve learned much more from reading. I appreciate film as an aesthetic creation that elicits emotion but basically no more than that. I used to value it so much more. Basically now I just watch 40s noir films and Grace Kelly’s filmography because I have a fixation, but it’s all popcorn to me now. I can’t justify it, even as someone who hopes to one day be an artist (in the broad sense, I want to write of course). It’s consumption.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 07:06:12 2018 No.10854379

>>10854377

Pursuing financial success feels like a temporary band-aid for my problem too. But it is one that I am wrestling with. Having a family some day and being able to buy your kids clothes that make them feel good about themselves, putting them in good schools with tutors, good healthcare, money for things like braces, accutane, health foods, a physical therapist, allowing them to try activities and club sports (which cost money), teaching them how to handle money well, all feels like worthy pursuits that require money. Maybe if I could provide that my kids could be the normal people that I would never dream of becoming. Of course there is also the risk that will turn your kids into assholes. But, sometimes it does feel pointless beyond making enough money to secure yourself a small, clean living space in a desirable place to live, and shunning the normal traps of consumerism like a nice car, gadgets, vacations, etc.

I guess consuming is the main problem I’m having. Internet addiction (4chan) and social media addiction is the same negativity (which I also struggle to reign in). Even books can become something similar, though perhaps not as bad. If we are only taking inwards, is that not a problem too?

Perhaps the solution is to create something? Getting into a skilled trade like carpentry or developing a business like being a potter or jeweler sounds fulfilling and worthwhile to me. But really at the core of it I feel the thing most worthwhile is creating art. I don’t know if I can articulate why. It’s a pursuit that lives on past your own life. Even if it’s just my great grandkids reading my novel or some of my poems out of curiosity, that feels nice to me. And if you have more success, even better. Being a painter or a musician feels similar to me as well, and I think it’s okay to consume a lot if you are also creating. All the great writers read very heavily and it helped them synthesize those experiences into better communicating their own story. If you’re a songwriter, I think it’s all right to listen to the Beatles or Bob Dylan or Woody Guthrie, whatever artist you admire, if it helps you become better at creating. But if you’re not creating you’re just consuming, and for me that eventually becomes disappointing and it doesn’t make me happy. I have nothing to show for it except knowledge which I don’t put to any kind of purpose.

I think if I really can hope to ever be happy as a depressive, I have to start creating really earnestly and throw myself into it with my whole heart.

There is also the human relationships and the happiness that comes from friendship and love, but I’ve gone on much too long already and I am unsure about those things.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 07:18:13 2018 No.10854401

>>10853508
I think I need to leave this place. I’ve been here for two years and familiarized myself with the major and minor authors that are recommended. At this point, my lit addiction is generally just keeping me from reading as much as I would if I didn’t go here. Very rarely in a recommendation thread do I see an author that I have no awareness of.

My main life goal is to be a good writer. So what am I getting out of being here that will help me continue to improve? I don’t post in critique threads because I don’t want my work traced back to here. Most of the discussion isn’t very good. I notice maybe one insightful post a month, and the rest of the time I’m just entertaining myself with memes and jokes that I get satisfaction out of because they are related to my obsession, literature and writing.

What’s worth it? Or am I just amusing myself and placing a stumbling block between me and success as a writer?

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 07:33:07 2018 No.10854439

Polly the NP-girl

there exists a path:
cos although arcs intersect
and though heads turn and voices project,
we stand silent, cornered, can't laugh
odd nodes, stuck,
to be cut
from the social graph

in an NP-world,
i'd be satisfied
with the shine of your hair
and your effervescent eyes.
but if that's not the case,
and you can't see
any nodes past the fringe
of adjacency,
then for all thoughts that cycle,
and for all variants i run,
and for all drinks and hot air,
hearts and
absent fun;
i won't know —
what words to breathe,
what tangents to twine,
what assumptions to believe —
if that link to you, on which i depend,
can't even verified by the night's end

iff you can see me,
then we can see we
please
help me
prove poly

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 09:09:34 2018 No.10854638 i think i am legitimately addicted to pornography and it worries me.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 09:19:54 2018 No.10854663 >>10853508 I always think about how my life could have been way different if only I listened to my inner voice, and was brave enough to act upon it. In reality I'm just living by the system, therefor I feel like my thoughts are meaningless.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 09:55:41 2018 No.10854759 >>10853508 I miss my cat.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 10:01:04 2018 No.10854777
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>>10853508
A prince of Orange, am I , free and fearless
The King of Spain, I have always honoured
To live in fear of God, I have always attempted
Because of this i was ousted, bereft of my land and my people

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 10:03:47 2018 No.10854784 >>10853508 I wish I was that cat

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 11:11:45 2018 No.10855025 >>10854439 i like this

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 11:14:38 2018 No.10855035 >>10854439 What about the proof that some autist was posting a month ago on /sci/? I was too tired to read it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 11:18:26 2018 No.10855052 File: 20 KB, 453x358, pacha2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10854777 >dem anapaests

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 13:14:45 2018 No.10855588
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Maybe I've had too much coffee but feel like I should drink more in order to force a healthy shit. I should be researching my state's cottage food laws and see how much a booth costs at a farmers market. Happy I'll see some friends at a show tonight, get a chance to slam dance. I need to work out today. Why do I still miss her and think about the times we fucked every morning when I wake up. Looking forward to lunch at a dirty taco joint in spic-town with my best friend tomorrow. I feel like we aren't as close as we used to be. Should I vocalize this.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 13:46:17 2018 No.10855691 My parent's split up after 25 years of marriage and my second cat died last week. Makes me wonder how much in life is really concrete. Obviously things change, but I'm still sitting here watching anime and doing nothing with my life.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 16:06:36 2018 No.10856318 >>10853589 >>10853592 I come here to learn

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 16:21:04 2018 No.10856398 >>10853508 I don't know how to start my novel without it reading disjointed.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 19:08:21 2018 No.10857206 >>10853508 I'm going through a list of quotes I've written down. Currently I'm at >"My gender is texan, My pronouns are yeehaw and howdy"

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 21:27:32 2018 No.10857864 Nothing really brings me joy in life right now other than cum town.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 21:29:28 2018 No.10857878 WHY THE FUCK NOBODY EVER TALKS ABOUT HART CRANE REEEEEEEEEEEE

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 21:35:55 2018 No.10857907 >>10857878 Because he's not an entry level pseud.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 21:51:08 2018 No.10857976
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>>10853508
I am so lost.

I'll be heading back to uni this upcoming semester and I don't have any idea what I'll major in. I'll probably default to philosophy but i don't think I can take anymore compute science courses. While I value education, getting a job is so crucial and I'm not willing to end up in a dead end career. I go to a good school but it everyone makes it sound majoring in anything but STEM or business will leave you jobless if you don't stay in academia. I won't quit this time because I took a year off in order to get my shit together because depression was making it so hard to maintain any shred to live. I finally processed through it so there's something, but god damn I'm not at home with this world anymore.

Are there good odds getting a job if I major in somehting like philosophy?

>pic related

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 21:54:42 2018 No.10857989 >>10857206 I laughed.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 21:59:38 2018 No.10858011

Do any of you place any credence in your dreams? Do any of you keep a dream journal? If so, do you feel it has benefitted you in any way?

I don't think dreams are premonitions, but I do believe they often suggest things about you or maybe a problem you're going through. I'm wondering if keeping a dream journal could help me sort through these thoughts

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:16:28 2018 No.10858104 >>10854439 Good stuff, NP-completely blew me away. I shall die this day.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:17:33 2018 No.10858108

>>10857976
I majored in something I loved. I now live at home and work a job that doesn't require any degree. I make about 1/4 of what all my STEM friends are making. I'm very poor and very bored and very unhappy. To answer your question: if you or your family know people and have connections, yes. If you don't, probably not.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:20:27 2018 No.10858127 >>10855691 Your cat wasn't, clearly. But seriously, sorry about your parents. It's difficult when unknown truths surface about the foundational people in your life.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:22:39 2018 No.10858133

>>10858011
I kept a dream journal for a few years. It was cool, and the word document was so long that it would stutter and slow down when trying to scroll through it all. I mainly kept it to remember my dreams long enough so I could discuss them over the phone with a girl I liked who went to college in a different state. Well, I more than liked her, I essentially loved her. Or at least I thought I did at the time. And maybe I still do. Back then I thought she felt the same way about me. Why else would we spend hours and hours on the phone, talking about everything, talking about silly dreams? Anyway, she fucked another guy and I stopped keeping the journal.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:23:53 2018 No.10858142 >>10858108 I appreciate the response

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:25:48 2018 No.10858151

>>10853508
I'm worried that taking a year off from school after graduating has put me too far behind all my friends, and I will be forced to watch them all live very happy, and successful lives while they pity me. I wish them the best, but just wish that I went with them instead of being lazy.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:29:49 2018 No.10858180 >>10858151 I'm in the same situation. Trust me, if they're really your friends they won't mind. You'll also make new friends at uni and you'll forget it.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:31:02 2018 No.10858182

>>10858142
Looking on what I wrote, it sounds very bleak. I should mention that I'm only a couple years out from college. I still have hope that I can get a good (or at least better) job soon and plan to move out as soon as I save up a few thousand dollars. I don't expect to live this way forever. Though if I do, I suppose I will have to learn to find other ways to be happy.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:38:52 2018 No.10858227

>>10853508
I've decided to kill myself. Going to burn charcoal in an enclosed space (broken down minivan). Probably will wait until early April to see if my psychiatrist can get me sleeping pills beforehand. He offered a prescription last time but I didn't want to seem like a pill fiend. Stupid. I'll just tell him the new antidepressants are making it hard to sleep, which is true.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:39:59 2018 No.10858235

>>10858182
It just seems that business want STEM majors but then after a while they are unable to move up to higher managing positions. This is from what I know from siblings and family members with jobs, and that demand is shifting away from STEM partly. Especially considering STEM has been the prioritized field for the past 50 years or so. My current thought is to major in philosophy and roll the dice that my current math and computer science credits will show that I'm capable.

I don't know, it all seems so fucked tbhh

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:49:30 2018 No.10858272 i'm sad tonight

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 22:59:25 2018 No.10858336 >>10858133 Sad anon. That sucks, but LDR sucks so probably for the best it ended

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:01:50 2018 No.10858354

>>10858011
I've had dreams about zombie power rangers, and chinese empresses canibalizing her own kingdom to radiation sandstorm turning people into retards with spatulas to kissing my high school crush to getting ran over by trains.
The only thing a dream means is that you aren't drinking enough water during the day.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:02:53 2018 No.10858358 >>10853602 eww nasty

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:06:54 2018 No.10858375 >>10858272 good

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:07:27 2018 No.10858379 >>10858375 that's not very nice

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:07:29 2018 No.10858381 >>10858354 I never have any dreams like that. Mine are always very grounded in reality. Most of my dreams deal with relations with people. Like seriously, nothing supernatural ever happens in any of my dreams

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:08:17 2018 No.10858383 >>10857976 try education and join the pyramid scheme of teaching philosophy

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:09:16 2018 No.10858389 >>10858227 Listen to cum town before you make your final decision.

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:13:54 2018 No.10858414

>>10858381
You aren't missing out on anything. I once had a dream where I spent what felt like an hour paraylized staring at a corpse as it screamed at me, while I was frozen and unable to move or make a sound. Just waking up was a feat on it's own and I could barely lift my covers. I only eventually wrestled out my bed in fear of going back to sleep so soon after waking up, since if you go to sleep you'll go back to the same dream.

But more often then not, I get visited by the three witches who will make me have three very long, taxing dreams through the night. One night I had to visit a family in a mansion where the rich couple had three daughters, but only two were alive, the eldest was a ghost from a village that raided by a tank crew that killed their commander after a mutiny. there's more to it, but I don't want to bore people about my dreams

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:27:34 2018 No.10858474 >>10858379 I'm not a nice guy >:^)

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:29:36 2018 No.10858488 >>10858354 I used to have dreams like that but now my dreams are just like normal life except my friends die.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:31:22 2018 No.10858493 >>10858488 That sounds foreboding. It's probably nothing though

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:31:34 2018 No.10858495 >>10858389 I;ve already listened to almost every episode, paid for premium for about a month even. really enjoyed Nick doing meatwad in the last one

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:32:25 2018 No.10858501 File: 96 KB, 346x550, Not Spooky.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10858488

Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:43:42 2018 No.10858545

I miss my autism /lit/. Since I've started trying to actually live my life I've changed. I miss my disdain for everything and everybody. I miss being able to not take anything seriously. I miss my old cruel, cold and indifferent universe, my cosmic mechanicism, the aimless burning of the stars. I miss my old elitistic solipsism that lived only through interior life and I miss masturbating at 4am to hentai videogames and feeling like there was nothing wrong it. Now I have thoughts like "transcendency, consciousness, history, world". I feel the need to sublate myself in something bigger than me to win death. I don't want to empathize with people anymore, I want to look down on them from the psychical depths of my room as I did before.
My old self feels betrayed.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 17 23:53:19 2018 No.10858579 File: 536 KB, 540x612, lanky.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Made my mom cry today.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:03:17 2018 No.10858623 >>10858579 was it cuz u told her ur gonna get ur balls removed and larp as a girl?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:10:22 2018 No.10858657 >>10853542 snapchat is the worst one

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:19:49 2018 No.10858720 >>10853527 >old man yells at cloud quick, how many beyonce songs can you name off the top of your head? If it's less than 15 then you're a broke dork and I don't need to talk to you

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:23:24 2018 No.10858735

>>10858720
did u ever see that youtube of hillary clinton at hot97 or whatever? they ax her whats in her bag and shes like "hot sauce!" with a straight face, the host is like "bitch u tryna pander? we not feelin it" and she's like "yeah, is it workin!?" with that big dumb smile, and the dnc is still baffled by why black voters didnt show up at the polls

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:26:28 2018 No.10858753 Life is neither good or bad it’s just life.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:29:57 2018 No.10858770 >>10854784 You can draw yourself as one, anon. uwu

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:31:00 2018 No.10858773 >>10854784 did u ever see that webcomic about wishing u were a cat?

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:39:25 2018 No.10858803

>>10854186
what sucks (im from a fairly cultured area) is when people are interested in shit but you have gone deeper than they have
>oh i like music?
>yeah what kind?
>oh i like psychedelic stuff
>oh so you listen to triple J and mac demarco
no fuck off cunt i listen to harsh psychedelic bootlegs or industrial demo tapes
>oh i see you have a book, youre into reading?
>yeah i am
>oh have you heard of milk and honey?
piss off thot im reading about gay sailors

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 00:56:13 2018 No.10858872 >>10858493 Yeah what this anon said, nothing. Probably.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:00:12 2018 No.10858889

>>10854186
Yep.
Sometimes I think of reading a book in public for the sole purpose of hopefully attracting a girl who is similar.

If you've seen Before Sunrise, that situation is pretty much my biggest fantasy. And if you haven't seen it go watch it and get depressed that you probably will never have such an experience

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:02:35 2018 No.10858897 I keep adding books to my shelf but I'm here shitposting instead of reading

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:05:35 2018 No.10858902

√Whatever I value in life eludes me like the wisp of love I felt three years ago as I passed the coffeeshop everyday on the walk to school. I knew what days she worked, and one day even mustered up the courage to ask her out. I paced back and forth in my living room, reciting to myself aloud what I would say and how. When I walked into the cafe, I could see that she was gathering her things to leave work. I said hi to her near the condiments bar, trying to get a read on her immediate plans. We had a good rapport, and I could feel that she knew we had some kind of palpable though ineffable connection: that feeling hearkened in movies of star-crossed lovers reuniting through an eternity of reincarnations (think Cloud Atlas). She told me she had lost her debit card downtown, and asked me if I'd like to accompany her to go retrieve it. Acting as smooth as possible, I contained my volcanic glee and said sure. As we began walking, I asked her questions about herself; I think she could tell I was nervous. Beautiful beyond belief and three years older than me, I don't blame myself for it at the time. Anyway, she informed me that she was a double major in English and philosophy: I asked her if she was joking. 'Too perfect to be true' was the phrase that shot to mind. And of course, it was. Like a cerebral palsied eleven year old trying to assemble a Lego set, I asked her if she'd like to go out sometime—something ambiguous about a drink without exactly sounding like a date. A tender sorrow immediately fell over her face as I saw the machinations of rejection quickly take form. She couldn't believe how cute I was, and her and her coworkers at the coffeeshop constantly talk about how much they love me (the quirky and charming daily customer) but alas, as the wanton cunts of fate would have it, she had a boyfriend. Of course I asked who he was in shameful bitterness and resentment. Oh, a guy from school. Fabulous. Fumbling with my knotted heartstrings, I convinced myself that I had left my glasses at the shop and needed to go get them. Of course, halfway back, I feel them in my pocket. My dejected spirit lied to me to avoid further embarrassment. Give me love or give me death: the friendzone is for the meek. Sadly, I only saw her two more times after that, both awkward encounters. She had already given her two week notice, and I couldn't help but, on some ineluctably marrow deep level of absolute cosmic certainty, know that I had missed the opportunity to be with the love of my life. And she just served me coffee. For a semester.

Some feelings just never leave you. It hurts.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:19:53 2018 No.10858955

>>10858803
>Wow anon, you're such a bookworm/hipster
>Talk about anna karenina, focusing on the Levin and Kitty chalk scene
>I should read that at some point haha. Have you ever read Paper Towns?

>>10858889
This is my biggest fantasy too. I want those fucking record store and ferris wheel scenes to happen to me.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:29:15 2018 No.10858989

it all hurts so much

press the button. receive a shock. win a million metaphorical dollars. why can't i do it?

it's all so simple and painful

all of it.

stuck amidst the most open field on the continent chained to the only tree in a hundred mile radius, and the saw is rusty.

I can, but will I? I don't know. people frequently give me compliments I don't feel I deserve, and yet entirely expect. "You're special, smart, funny," oh fuck me—I hate the narcissistic thoughts creeping invariably in. My problems sound so silly when said aloud, and feel all the more difficult.

I'm probably going to die alone and forgotten, at least after a generation.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:31:43 2018 No.10858997 >>10858989 So does this mean to fap to 2d porn or 3d porn?

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:32:52 2018 No.10859003

>>10858955
Fuck I so desperately want that. Just a day with a girl you feel such a crazy intense connection with in a city unknown to both of you having the most meaningful conversations you've ever had.
After watching that movie I kind of realized I've never really felt a genuine connection with any girl I've been with. I always like them, but I'm never infatuated with them, I always felt like we had nothing to discuss and our time together was always dull, usually if I was with them I was just counting the seconds down to either sex or leaving.
Except for one girl, I did feel a pretty good connection, but things didn't work out for unfortunate reasons

Not gonna lie, I've started saving up for a trip to Europe because of that movie

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:36:49 2018 No.10859017

>>10858997
actually i've been restricting myself to vintage playboys. I have the fiftieth anniversary collector's edition coffee table book, and it's pretty cash money. Videographic porn has led me to fall out of touch with my own sexuality, so I'm trying to reclaim my roots by ogling good ole fashioned wood pulp and ink

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:39:43 2018 No.10859025 >>10853508 My eyes are burning and almost closing by themselves. I'm really need and want to go to sleep, but I don't have the energy of getting off this chair to take a piss and then head to bed.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:39:51 2018 No.10859026 >>10854439 nice

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:40:26 2018 No.10859033
File: 177 KB, 500x500, 1509876541350.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Had a devil's threeway, the dude looked like moot and had a fucking soda can on his 120 lbs body. I finally figured out I'm bi after a long time of confusion.

But that's not what I care about -- the fact is that I've chosen a career field that people only care enough about to give lip service to or so they can hunt (not that I'm shittalking hunters, they're the reason my field exists). Nature is the most beautiful thing on this planet. Please recycle and petition your congressman to vote for ecologically friendly laws. Also buy a lot of guns and ammo because that 11% tax gets my dick fucking harder than sucking cock while I fuck a girl.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:42:53 2018 No.10859043 >>10859033 Are you sure it wasn't moot?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:44:23 2018 No.10859052 >>10853530 No, the worst lie we tell ourselves is that 4chan is less bad than other forms of social media.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:45:02 2018 No.10859055 >>10859043 He'd have to be a time traveler and not from Flow rider. But yes moot and I sucked each other off.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:53:28 2018 No.10859094 >>10858803 Gay Sailors?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:56:26 2018 No.10859105 >>10859094 moby dick faggot

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 01:57:45 2018 No.10859109 >>10859017 Godspeed, Anon

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:00:06 2018 No.10859115

>>10858889
My girlfriend and I got together while I was working a summer job because I was reading One Hundred Years of Solitude. She sat down and started reading over my shoulder, I had just started it and one of the first thing she read was talking about "iguana children" and she looked at me like I was crazy, but I tried to explain it was a child that was a product of incest and he was born with a tail, so pretty much one of the worst parts of the book she could have jumped into, for my sake at least. But she sat and read it with me and we deciphered it together and tried to remember which Aureliano was which, and we fell in love while reading that book on our breaks together. It was a pretty amazing feeling. Since then we've hurt each other in lots of ways and it's been tough, but I can't and don't want to be without her. She's so special to me, I admit. She doesn't read as much as I do, but occasionally we can sit down and read a book beyond the typical YA tier novel. The last book we started reading together was A Tree Grows in Brooklyn and it was starting off well but other responsibilities got in the way. Falling in love through a book is a really special feeling, anon. I hope you experience it someday.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:00:07 2018 No.10859116 >>10859094 a broad scope of mishima's work >>10859105 mob my dick faggot

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:00:17 2018 No.10859118 hell ya just downloaded the audiobook of doniger's "on hinduism", 'bout to get comfy and listen all night

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:01:08 2018 No.10859125 >>10859105 They aren't gay

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:04:37 2018 No.10859139

>>10858414
>But more often then not, I get visited by the three witches who will make me have three very long, taxing dreams through the night. One night I had to visit a family in a mansion where the rich couple had three daughters, but only two were alive, the eldest was a ghost from a village that raided by a tank crew that killed their commander after a mutiny. there's more to it, but I don't want to bore people about my dreams

sounds interesting desu

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:05:14 2018 No.10859142 >>10859125 >They aren't gay ok if u say so

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:07:57 2018 No.10859150 >>10859125 Neither are traps but here we are

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:10:37 2018 No.10859156 24-year-old virgin neet who didn't go to college and never worked i have no drive to do anything but read, watch videos, and listen to music requesting books to inspire me to leave my house trying to go 30 days without porn but fuck it's hard.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:13:51 2018 No.10859167 >>10859156 The bible

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:14:00 2018 No.10859168

>>10859156
tell ur parents to stop pampering u like a baby, it's their fault for letting you get away with being a lazy shit, if uve got a cousin or uncle or something in another state maybe you should go live with them for the summer and get away from your parents who are clearly infantilizing you

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:15:52 2018 No.10859174 >>10859156 The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:23:07 2018 No.10859195

>>10859115
Lovely story anon, sounds like a nice thing you got going on.
I hope so as well. There is this girl who I'm into who is pretty into books as well, she wasn't always but recently got into them. I feel like I'm her curator of literary knowledge or something. But at the same time, I don't think she's into me, she is incredibly hard to get a read and seems very uninterested in anything unless she says it. She's always a pretty rude texter and has a bad influence of friends so it's very hard to plan anything.

Maybe one day

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:26:55 2018 No.10859201 >>10853553 Your personality is based on what i consume This is why people don't respect you.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:48:06 2018 No.10859256

>>10859168
>tell ur parents to stop pampering u
feels more like they just don't care. my mom has been on my ass for years to "get a job" but i've always found her tone grating as fuck and it makes me want to not do anything (based reverse psychology)

>>10859168
>if you've got a cousin or uncle or something in another state maybe you should go live with them
bro, i don't socialize at all. i can't communicate for shit. how am i even supposed to arrange something like this? i just don't care. and they probably wouldn't care. i've become content with my current situation. wake up. brush my teeth. read for an hour. workout. eat breakfast. go on computer. browse 4chan/watch youtube/watch a movie/read a book for the next few hours. eat lunch. browse 4chan/watch youtube/watch a movie/read a book for the next few hours. eat a 2nd lunch. browse 4chan/watch youtube/watch a movie/read a book for the next few hours. eat dinner. browse 4chan/watch youtube/watch a movie/read a book for the next few hours. go to sleep. that's my current routine and i don't give a fuck enough to change it. but i know it's not good for me in the long term, except i don't care enough to do anything else. also there's some time for masturbation somewhere.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:49:01 2018 No.10859260 >>10853508 Kitty kitty wants some cheese

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:52:04 2018 No.10859274 >>10859201 >>10853553 based on what you consume* oops

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:54:31 2018 No.10859283 >>10859256 well if u keep doing that one day you're gonna wake up and be 35

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 02:55:46 2018 No.10859288 >>10859283 at least i won't be dead.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 03:02:21 2018 No.10859299 File: 460 KB, 800x1132, AWAZU-1_800.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] I'm so weak I'm not strong I don't know how to be strong If you told me I would be too weak to become strong. The reward for living is dying.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 03:38:35 2018 No.10859398 How many of you are well-adjusted adults with friends and so on? I've always been a loner, but since losing the weight people treat me somewhat nicely, and I could make a few friends if I chose to. Should I cast myself out there?

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 03:57:16 2018 No.10859439

>tfw had a girl listen to my poetry last night and actually liked it
>tfw she hugged me and it felt like the burden of life was lifted from me
>tfw i will never see her again and i understand how pathetic it is that this is one of the best experiences i've ever had with women
>tfw this was my last break ever
>tfw i have to go full william stoner after this

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:03:04 2018 No.10859451

>>10859398
I would say Im well adjusted as far as socializing goes. I'm extremely extroverted, I find it easy to make new friends and have a lot of friends who are always seeking me out to talk, which I take as a sign that I'm interesting to talk to.

Just cast yourself out there, most people are very friendly once you've shared a few words with them and they will treat you how you treat them, be polite and kind and people will treat you the same. Make sure you understand what to do when you socialize though, since you've been a loner your socialization skills might be a little rusty, but its a skill none the less and you can learn to be a great socializer.

>Don't complain too much unless you're both complaining together
>Be light hearted and funny, but serious and thoughtful when you're talking with someone about an issue of theirs
>Don't bombard people with things they aren't interested in, try and figure out what people enjoy talking about and don't enjoy talking about so that you can have a good quality conversation
>Ask lots of questions, especially if you're talking about a topic that you don't have a lot of expertise in, don't risk embarrassing yourself by pretending to know more than you do
>If you are not confident, fake confidence until you are actually confident
>Act socially dominant and people will treat you better
>Compliment people, but do so tastefully, just be honest about qualities that people have that you like
>Faking confidence is fine but dont be a fake person, essentially try not to act to antithetical to who you are on the inside because people can pick up on that and dont appreciate it

Those are all my tips, good luck.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:09:44 2018 No.10859480

>>10859451
Thanks for the tips anon. My main fear is that people will pick up on how strange I am, since I've been a friendless shut-in for several years now and a NEET for one. And if I don't give a shit about the subject, do I fake it, or try to switch to something else? This site has made me a bit dis-enthused and bitter, so I can't pretend to care about the latest blockbuster films and such.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:17:53 2018 No.10859506

>>10859480
I am incredibly strange, I'm very very far from normal, however I'm confident about it, I act exactly how I want to and do exactly as I want, if you are strange you just have to own it and most people will respect that, it also shows that you're a genuine person.

If you dont give a shit about the subject but the other person is passionate about it, let them talk about it and try and feed off their passion, it becomes less about the explicit subject and more about learning about the person, theres a kind of subtext. Most people have very interesting things to say if you give them a chance to express why they like something, turn it into a game to get at the root of what makes someone who they are, probe lightly and understand them, it can become very enjoyable and fulfilling to understand someones character, now not everyone will be interesting to you but I think you'll find that its more people than you would first assume.

So don't fake it, but don't dismiss it either.

If people are talking about art, books, or movies, its perfectly acceptable and often good for discussions sake to share your criticisms, but don't be too forceful or you risk making people feel stupid and you will make yourself look arrogant, if you aren't interested its okay to explain to them why you aren't interested in seeing the latest marvel movie or whatever it is. You can learn to not be such a bitter and disenthused person by practicing.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:23:57 2018 No.10859531 >>10858133 you sound like a dipshit.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:28:03 2018 No.10859540

>>10859506
From the sound of it, all it really takes is to fake some confidence, keep the discussion oriented on them, and get a lot of practice, and the rest will come on its own. I once read that all anxious people share the same trait of focusing all their energy on themselves instead of their partner, and that's what makes them look so unnatural. It would seem that the initial hurdle is the biggest, and afterwards it's smooth sailing. I appreciate the advice, man.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:29:27 2018 No.10859545

I'm a good student on paper (3.9 cum. GPA after 3 years) but am actually a terrible student that doesn't study and loses most of what I "learn" immediately after the semester ends. even though I recognized this years ago I never felt motivated to change this as I can just keep getting good grades without the effort.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:34:52 2018 No.10859562

>>10859540
>all it really takes is to fake some confidence, keep the discussion oriented on them, and get a lot of practice

thats the gist of it yeah c: You hit the nail on the head when describing why anxious people have a harder time socializing, once you calm yourself down and learn to just flow with the conversation, talking becomes one of lifes ultimate joys. Seriously, nothing will make you feel as good in life as a good conversation with a good friend.

I wish you the best of luck get over the first hurdle, just keep at it and you will get it.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:36:28 2018 No.10859564 the opening bars to holland, 1945 make me happier than anything else at this point

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:38:56 2018 No.10859569 >>10853583 this obsession with productivity... capitalism has really pushed his dick deep down into some people

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:44:14 2018 No.10859585 >>10853807 you akt infantile, you have to mature into emotional adulthood.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:47:11 2018 No.10859593 >>10853886 it might help to replace fucking a chick with making love to a woman. might make all the difference you need

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:50:45 2018 No.10859600 I have no clue as to what I'm doing, what I want, or what I am.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 04:59:40 2018 No.10859615 >>10854638 i was too. luckily, through some strange coincidences i was able to see my addiction for what it was. It can be a problem that reaches far into the past and so it is difficult to unroot.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 05:06:19 2018 No.10859634 >>10858354 not true but it can happen sometimes

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 05:07:41 2018 No.10859638 >>10859564 literally me but the entirety of enter the mirror, listening to the first 0.5 seconds of the song fill me with more joy than anything in this world

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 05:29:55 2018 No.10859683 I want to write my novel but I'm scared people won't like it due to the Main character dying in the end.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 05:44:04 2018 No.10859705 I did absolutely fucking nothing today apart from eating too much.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 07:44:57 2018 No.10859965
File: 58 KB, 1229x1160, BAAEA5DD-2B43-4916-86A3-A82C41F22E65.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Raised Catholic
>Grow up with an idea of an all loving God
>You can get hurt, you can be a bad person, you can think you wanna die
>He still loves you
>You have this constant sense of being showered with external affection
>Become atheist
>Think of it as just “lol no god w/e” for a while
>Realize I can be wrong on something, and not even have God love me
>I could be in a situation where noone loves me
>It could legitimately not matter if I kill myself
>And then there’s just nothing
>Embrace meaning in nothing
>Just be a good person lol reduce suffering
>But I still feel liek (lol Mudkipz :D) i’m missing something
>I need to feel loved
>By a girl no I’m too afraid of what they might do to me
>I don’t fully trust them
>I trust guys
>Affectionate guys
>You can fight but there is a level of comfort
>Because they love you
>Realize I had a boy like that and I miss it
>His name was God
>I’m a virgin despite/because of the fact that I’m heartbroken over the loss of God
>Tfw

If you fell for the Mudkipz bait, please lurk more.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 09:28:50 2018 No.10860214

>don't feel at home with my parents anymore
>lost most contact with high school friends
>don't have any uni friends or real social structure
>have to move again after I graduate next year anyway
>terrified I'll be a literal recluse after this
>have to deal with normies say "I can't wait to go somewhere new and start my career :^)"

books for this feel?

>>10859705
Fucking same anon. I shit out a few hundred words in my novel at two in the morning to feel like it wasn't a total waste of time.

>>10859569
Productivity is a good thing, man is a beast of labor. But capitalism has memed "productivity" into meaning "good for capitalism".

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 10:09:29 2018 No.10860317 >>10853778 Just dont get more drunk than her

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 10:16:07 2018 No.10860332 >>10853945 I feel you Stop watching porn

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 11:59:39 2018 No.10860590 >>10858803 >oh I love books, anon! wonderful, what are some of your favorites? >Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, The Fault in our Stars, The Audacity of Hope! get the fuck away from me cunt

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 12:03:18 2018 No.10860596

>>10858889
One time I was reading Franny and Zooey in public and a cute girl with a dog talked to me about it for a couple minutes. It was so nice and unusual and felt like Before Sunrise or something for those brief moments. But then she was like "oh well I gotta go! I'm on my way to meet up with my boyfriend!"

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 12:11:17 2018 No.10860620

>>10858889
I'm the guy who you replied to. A few days ago in class I started talking to an unknown girl who was reading a Murakami's book. Everything was going fine until his boyfriend arrived. The girl was average, he was a fucking fat and pudgy ogrelet. That did hurt for a while

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 12:14:38 2018 No.10860629 >>10859965 >he wants to be tenderly cuddled after a biblical ass-fucking Are all Catholics bottom bitches?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 12:28:15 2018 No.10860674 I had a really good day a couple of weeks ago where I wasn't stressed out at work, caught up with some old friends, had a drink and watched a nice film then got to bed early. Sounds pretty simple, and it is, but I hardly ever have days like that.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 13:37:38 2018 No.10860976 >Slothrop goes down the toilet What the FUCK Pynchon?

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 17:15:07 2018 No.10862002

I had a pretty good gig going at my job until this guy turned up. He's keen as mustard and full of a youthful energy that seems impervious to any sense of his own limitations. Ordinarily this wouldn't be too offensive but I can't stand the guy, his restless pacing and bragging about work he has done betrays a certain neediness. It's all largely a front as I know he is not as good as he thinks he is but management seem to be at least fooled in part. In a way he is a rival to me due to the way we work.

I ruminate about my psychology and why I feel threatened by all this. I suppose the underlying fear is that this guy might get all the monetary rewards and admiration because people can't see through the act, they are fooled by the bluster and I am therefore unable to do anything but witness what I feel to be a gross violation of fairness. My narcissistic imagination plays this out as some kind of movie, a repressed office guy having a newcomer come in and shatter the fragile sense of order, as the first guy is unable to do anything but watch powerlessly. I watched an episode of Friends where Ross tries to convince everyone that Rachel's new boyfriend is a bully but nobody believes him.

Thinking on it further, I wonder if I am actually all that different to this guy. I too crave the admiration, and the monetary reward is only a second order effect of that need for validation. I'm as restless and needy but perhaps I just hide it, I'm not laying it out there. Maybe this guy is a nemesis, a copy of me that is held up as a mirror to remind me that I have no control and that not everyone is going to be an ally of mine, someone I find agreeable. There are free agents out there with their own designs and you can't do anything about it. Is this going to end up with me being carried out by security? I would hope not but that does happen in real life as well as the movies.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 17:44:15 2018 No.10862111 >>10853829 What carrier do you use? How much does it cost?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 17:53:39 2018 No.10862147 niggers that’s all I got

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 17:55:45 2018 No.10862163 File: 43 KB, 580x435, 1187494506.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10859115 >Falling in love through a book is a really special feeling, anon. I hope you experience it someday. >tfw i will never experienced that

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 17:59:04 2018 No.10862180 File: 259 KB, 760x942, fortnaldo_zpsce51daa5.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10859439

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 18:02:56 2018 No.10862198 >>10859506 >I am incredibly strange, I'm very very far from normal lol, the more extrovert one person is, the more likely is to be generic lowest common denominator type of person stop deluding yourself anon, you are a fucking bugman

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 18:13:36 2018 No.10862244 >>10862198 plenty of introverts are McPeople anon you’re naive

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 18:14:26 2018 No.10862254 >>10862198 No, some of the loudest people in public are very strange. They're the main kind of personality you see in cringe videos on youtube, though not all are losers of course. Perhaps this is mainly a US thing, though.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 18:19:36 2018 No.10862273 File: 92 KB, 576x654, 4690b05bd11991e4.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10862198 >behaviour can't change

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 18:29:16 2018 No.10862320 Fuck off reddit

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 18:34:47 2018 No.10862339 >>10859506 You're a fraud and a psychopath. And you know it.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:36:47 2018 No.10862817

>10862254
>No, some of the loudest people in public are very strange

yeah, it´s strange that people have extroverted personalities, are you a fucking dumbass or what? just go outside, 90% of people are extroverted, they have an infinite number of friends and such

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:37:52 2018 No.10862821 >>10862817 >>10862254

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:39:31 2018 No.10862828 File: 35 KB, 750x720, 1512047425037.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10859506 >look at me i´m so quirky, strange and a special snowflake how embarrassing

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:40:30 2018 No.10862835 >>10853508 a hat!

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:40:58 2018 No.10862837 I've realized why I hate drinking alcohol. Alcohol shows me that I am a lonley piece of shit who wants nothing more than be loved.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:41:15 2018 No.10862839 I haven't dedicated nearly as much time to reading more challenging works like Evola as I feel I should.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:42:48 2018 No.10862845 File: 20 KB, 400x400, 1506062980397.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10859506 in other words, you´re a fucking normie, congrats for that

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 20:44:57 2018 No.10862854 >>10862320 it will only get worse as they flee their cesspool for this one

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 21:04:40 2018 No.10862941
File: 82 KB, 600x800, images.duckduckgo.com.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10853508
I'm not at home with this world anymore but I'm optimistic about making changes, so I'm educating myself in hopes that I'll become on the forefront of preventing our world from going to shit.

Cuz nigga it goin down the drain. KOBE!

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 21:09:59 2018 No.10862969 >>10862111 I have AT&T, and it costs about 20 bucks a month.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 22:14:47 2018 No.10863231 >>10862854 humanities chan when? We had a pretty good thread about that once but the fascist mods removed it.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 22:15:30 2018 No.10863235 >>10853508 The nigger stole.

Anonymous Sun Mar 18 22:17:58 2018 No.10863244

>>10863231
the subculture is dead, internet is not for high iq autism anymore, /pol/ even, the worst of all the boards by far, is inferior now to what it was before the election surge. things will simply deteriorate slowly, steadily and without any opportunity for salvaging the best pieces of the movement of consciousness that produced internet psychedelica. we’ve crested already, accepting this without qualms is the best thing to do. Too bad, the world is even more hostile to neurodivergent anti-social types than it was 10 years ago. They’ll just die off

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 23:14:00 2018 No.10863499 >>10859201 >>10859274 Respect is overrated.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 23:17:37 2018 No.10863514 I've decided that suicide is pretty dumb after seeing that one anon an hero recently. I'll wait until I'm like 60.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 23:19:38 2018 No.10863520 >>10863244 there's still irc, all the normies go on slack or discord or whatever, efnet will always be the internet's autism ghetto, irc is cool too cuz its mostly gen-xers cuz there aren't any emojis or anime boobs, but there are dank asciis tho

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 18 23:29:11 2018 No.10863562 >>10863514 oh shit someone an hero'd recently? tell us the story, did they livestream it? i always tell myself ill kill myself later just get through the day, but actually doing it is pretty pointless

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:08:26 2018 No.10863724

Sometimes when I'm reading over my writing (usually for emails and forums) I cringe at the number of times I used the word "I". Don't have any good strategies on how to revise when this happens but sometimes the conversation is informal enough that I can get away with deleting a portion of them.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:15:38 2018 No.10863755 Nobody on /lit/ has anything worthwhile to say.

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:38:29 2018 No.10863820

I want to wake up tomorrow with no earthly ties. I want to wake up tomorrow in a far off land, with no friends, family, classmates, coworkers, neighbors, peers, strangers, customers, companions, or lovers to remember me. I want to be alone. Completely. To be able to die one day and have no one miss me the next.

>>10863755
>Nobody has anything worthwhile to say.

fix'd

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:40:51 2018 No.10863831 >>10863562 lurk moar

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:42:09 2018 No.10863840

>>10863562
An 18 year old who frequently visited /r9k/ live streamed his suicide on Youtu e this month. It's being posted all over the board, and was big for a day or two on /adv/, /tv/, /b/, /pol/, etc.

The video shows him shooting himself with a shotgun and having his head completely obliterated. It explodes and the impact knocks his corpse back, and releases a tarp he had installed behind him to shield the wall of his cranial remains. The footage shows his mother finding his corpse, her yelling, her distress, her call to 911, the arrival of the parademics, and the nervous laughters of the policemen once they arrive.

I kept watching it over and over, trying to figure out if there was something that could have been done.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:44:46 2018 No.10863857 >>10863831 sorry fag i don't wallow in /r9k/ or where ever u and ur sucidal buddies hangout

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:47:38 2018 No.10863867 >>10863840 holy shit that sounds like some real old thyme 4chan action bro link it up, been too much normie reddit shit lately, need something to keep it real...yo it would be funny if it was actually adrian lamo, but he was like 37

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:47:47 2018 No.10863870 >>10863840 why were the police laughing?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:47:57 2018 No.10863871 >>10863857 i can smell the new on you

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:48:39 2018 No.10863872 >>10863870 They were laughing at the jokes they were telling each other.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:51:32 2018 No.10863884 >>10863840 >live leak says "this might not be appropriate for viewers under 18" u kno its hardcore when liveleak warns u before clickin... oh it's that guy with the tiger rainbow balaclava

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:52:51 2018 No.10863890 >>10863871 >guy still browses /b/ >calls others new what is this 2007

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:53:02 2018 No.10863892 >>10863840 >I kept watching it over and over, trying to figure out if there was something that could have been done. Yeah, someone could have not given him a fucking shotgun.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:54:46 2018 No.10863898 >>10853778 A lot of potential. Good and bad. Dont get your ass allegated.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:55:12 2018 No.10863901 >>10863820 Why the want for isolationism?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:55:52 2018 No.10863902 >>10863892 it's a psyop to push for gun control

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:57:10 2018 No.10863909 >>10863872 disgusting pigs

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:58:05 2018 No.10863913 that was a pretty rad suicide desu, definitely inspiring, one of the best i've seen so far

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 00:58:15 2018 No.10863914

The glass looked blue as the rain poured. I sat in the passenger, watching the wind send the drops careening down the side. I like to keep the window down and let the water fall onto my coat. Something about the fresh, energized air hits the right signals. I don’t even know who is driving, what is behind my eyes, I just gaze out the window.

I wonder what its like behind a different pair of eyes, how certain moments could be lost on one. Well I know how first hand, I just don’t see why I’d ever go back.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:01:23 2018 No.10863926 that guy went out like a champ

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:01:46 2018 No.10863927 >>10858358 Nigga you gay

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:01:51 2018 No.10863928 >>10863867 If you go to /r9k/ right now, I guarantee you'll find a webm. >>10863892 He waves to the camera, and there's a second of hesitation before he pulls the trigger. That second was what made the video worse imo.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:11:05 2018 No.10863947 yo were did he get that mask i wanna wear that to pride this year, although nypd wont let ppl in crowds wear masks

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:12:24 2018 No.10863951 >>10863947 You type like a fucking faggot. Clean your shit up.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:13:07 2018 No.10863953 >>10863928 that chick on the stream is such a phony piece of shit "you're our BEST FRIEND" you LIE ho, u can hear her fake voice when she says it

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:14:25 2018 No.10863954 >>10863951 oh now the "newfag scolder" whats us all to type like redditors with sticks up our ass, fuck off fag

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:17:46 2018 No.10863958 >>10863954 >go on /lit/, a board for literature >incapable of writing I'm embarrassed for you.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:17:49 2018 No.10863960 >>10853564 So you're a fag then too? Get out, fag, and take OP with you.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:20:00 2018 No.10863964 >>10863954 >type like redditors >laughinggirls.jpg

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:23:21 2018 No.10863975 >>10863964 >using correct grammar and spelling shows my superior intellect and makes me feel euphoric!

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:28:20 2018 No.10863987

so i wonder what set him off that day, like what tells someone to decide "today is the day"

u can tell the "do the right thing sadbot" guy is fucking the chick who's crying, no wonder he killed himself, having to listen to chad and his fuck buddy telling u to stay live, good job sadbot, fuck those fags

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:38:41 2018 No.10864010
File: 550 KB, 400x400, tumblr_mej6yxDzeO1rsaugwo1_400.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

About a year ago I was a shambling drunk, lashing out at friends, letting my brain and body go to shit, thoughts of suicide standing on my apartment roof, terrible resentful romantic relationships. I'm clawing my way back out of the shell I thought I was done with years ago. Funny enough, I think having my heart shattered is what made me change. Once she was gone, I wasn't content with being alone, I realized I didn't like my own company.

I'm really proud of how far I've come. I treat my friends better, I'm more emotionally honest, I have better/stable relationships with women, I don't drink as much, and I'm starting to hit my short term goals for a lot of things, going to classes more, getting better grades.

It all kind of hit me tonight. I looked in the mirror and for the first time in a really long time I was happy to see the face looking back. I even gave myself a little smile. Like
>"Look at you! You're cute! You're nice! You're charming! You're getting your shit together! Hell yeah!"

I might cry right now guys.

Thanks for reading my diary desu

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:44:10 2018 No.10864028 >>10864010 just because u like yourself doesn't mean anyone else will, i'm happy with my life and the way i look but that doesnt mean normies dont consider me human scum

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:47:48 2018 No.10864040 oh man i forgot how good being depressed feels

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:49:30 2018 No.10864044 >>10863975 >thinking I wasn't just making fun of you just for being petty in the first place >laughterintensifies

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:50:04 2018 No.10864046 >>10864028 oh some people can't stand me, and i've had to leave some friends behind. but it's whatever man, other people like me.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:52:12 2018 No.10864050 >>10864044 >thinking nitpicking grammar is gonna rustle somebody on this site u have to go back

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:55:05 2018 No.10864060 >>10858227 Don't do it. Jurassic World 2 comes out in June.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:55:56 2018 No.10864063 File: 387 KB, 1987x1553, 1458122715459.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10864010 Good job anon

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:56:51 2018 No.10864066 >>10864060 ya plus pitchfork said kanye is workin on a new album

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:57:42 2018 No.10864068 >>10864050 >not knowing what grammar is >not knowing what petty means >thinking im somehow embarrassed to go on another website >thinking i care enough to go out of my way to rustle you supersaiyanlaughter.jpg

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:58:11 2018 No.10864070 >>10864060 Are you trying to make him kill himself sooner? Unless you're only advocating for it because of BDHs brapper

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 01:58:41 2018 No.10864072
File: 123 KB, 1300x1046, 1520811157320.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10853508
I know this is going to be extremely pretentious and fedora-tier, but it's honestly how I feel.

The cute goth girl I liked turned out to be much less smart and thoughtful than I thought, to the point I don't think I'll be able to establish a meaningful relationship with her because we're too different and I'm too much of an autist to "get" normal non-depressed people. She's a simple, very outgoing girl that I really don't know what to say to.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:02:59 2018 No.10864082 My alarm is programmed to go off in 2 and a half hours. Should I try to get some sleep or just say fuck it and shitpost until it's time for my morning routine?

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:03:32 2018 No.10864083
File: 59 KB, 750x563, Spice Wurm.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I haven't done any creative writing since I was in highschool 8 years ago. I took a break from actual reading and spent a couple months plowing through as many low quality, Japanese, power fantasy, lightnovels and got inspired to make my own. It was going to heavily parody the genre and I was going to jam as many anime, scifi, and lightnovel references in as I could. Every arc and most of the characters were going to be practically ripped strait from different series which got me thinking. At what point does a work stop being parody and become fan fiction?

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:03:57 2018 No.10864086

>>10864072
oh thats the biggest letdown when u finally talk to that girl with the bleached hair and german army surplus jacket that's always smoking outside the student lounge and it turns out she's not radical or even intelligent, just some normie who picked a edgy look off a fashion blog

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:05:05 2018 No.10864088 >>10864068 only person around here i see gettin rustled is u, friend

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:07:55 2018 No.10864094 >>10864082 as long as ur sure u wont sleep through ur alarm its better to sleep dude, 2 hours u can get like 2 or 3 rems in, if u stay up ull be more awake at first but by the end of the day it will be like u have alzheimers

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:08:13 2018 No.10864095 >>10864082 If you didn't sleep well the night before, go get some. Two hours make a world of difference in my experience.

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:12:59 2018 No.10864105

>>10864072
>I know this is going to be extremely pretentious and fedora-tier, but it's honestly how I feel.

Oh please with that shit dude. You are a human on a literature board, share every and any thought that crosses your mind and don't let anyone make you feel like you can't. I liked what you wrote, you should share it with the chick I bet she'd like to hear it. What do you really have to lose anyway? I wrote this for a girl in my trigonometry class

Bitter fish bitter fish
Toss your coin and make a wish
Swimming straight through grooves and divots
I'll show you how that tail can pivot

With shiny scales and a voice to match
How you think I judge you makes me laugh
You're like a sunny view
I want your autograph

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:18:36 2018 No.10864118 >>10864088 >thinking those posts are for you, and not for everyone else reading

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:36:52 2018 No.10864163 File: 79 KB, 710x473, 11-freud.w710.h473[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10853771 How've your erections been recently? Been pushing rope with your sexual partners as of late?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 02:50:48 2018 No.10864210 man that sadbot video was the greatest thing ever, i'm way more focused and productive when i'm alienated from normies, i've been larping as a normal too much lately, i need to let the tism flow

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:01:02 2018 No.10864230 >>10864210 Seriously people are retarded. Be yourself, speak up, we are humans!

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:01:04 2018 No.10864231 >>10864086 I've had this experience so many times I don't even pay any attention to girls who look like they might be interesting anymore.

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:25:55 2018 No.10864311

All of my friends make more money than me. All of my friends are in long term relationships. Many of my friends are getting engaged. They all live in gentrified neighborhoods in overpriced cities. They all seem so happy. They go on vacations. They have parents who are alive and still married. They have no college debt because their parents were smart and responsible and saved for them. My friends drink more than me. Many of them do drugs and have never had any consequences, either with the law or with their health. Some of them steal. Some of them cheat. They mock God. They post on Reddit. Soon they will be buying houses and having kids. When we were kids we didn't have so many differences between us. We played and joked around and had experiences together and we were all equal. We could explore old barns or ride bikes or go swimming in the river or watch movies like Airplane and The Naked Gun. Now we only see each other at breweries mostly, or the latest hip bars, or the newest Korean BBQ joints, and various other places where our interactions are based around consuming alcohol and food. Consume consume consume consume consume. Oh, this friend just bought a new car, very nice. Oh, this friend is buying some stocks in a tech company, very nice. Oh, this friend has picked up my tab at the brewery, thank you, oh thank you, so kind, thank you so much. My friends know I cannot afford it. Yet they invite me to consume with them and I accept every time. Because they're all I have. I love them but I don't like what they've become, and I don't know what I am to become.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:37:04 2018 No.10864350 >>10864311 Jesus, you just described so many people I know

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:38:28 2018 No.10864354

>>10864231
The girls who look like they might be interesting are usually the boring ones. They have to look extravagant and eye catching because they have no substance beneath
I guarantee the type of girl you're looking for (personality wise) is of quite normal looks

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:44:06 2018 No.10864374 >>10864010 now to stop being a blbitch

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:55:31 2018 No.10864399

This is what's on my mind. Sorry for whoring myself out so much but I genuinely want to get everybody's opinion on my writing.

Prologue
>https://docs.google.com/document/d/1GhxSpPjuz_2OGDMgsrLS2Ui24gQFRQvbrlYKwQxSPUI/edit?usp=sharing

Chapter 1
>https://docs.google.com/document/d/1fzCkCTAYCuY3xC23NU3pkM5MyuJnnNSdNV5cEuyNdKo/edit?usp=sharing

Chapter 2 (not even close to being done)
>https://docs.google.com/document/d/1D9wSIVQYBiRWgkYD_DGowwqIKlEELfCG2pPlxiFbk3I/edit?usp=sharing

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 03:56:33 2018 No.10864403 File: 1.29 MB, 912x1157, 100233b9518097e66e89d5ec7f77bde2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10864399 Pic sort of goes with my post.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:33:11 2018 No.10864490 >>10854377 >>10854379 just wanted to let you know that i read this, thanks for posting anon go workout

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:36:34 2018 No.10864500

>>10853508
I started fantasizing about what I would do if I was able to drop my current mind into me 6 years ago, time travel to when I was 16. I definitely have problems and am disappointed with how my life has turned out, but whatever.

I find it a little funny, but the first thing I’d do if I woke up in bed at 16 would be get up and shave my head bald. Full skinhead. The reason is so girls will leave me the fuck alone. Even though I had some success and was pretty normie then, high school crushes and relationships where not worth it desu.

Any of you ever felt the same? What would you do if you were in a similar scenario. How would you handle life differently?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:42:10 2018 No.10864517 File: 941 KB, 1267x528, matrix wallpaper.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] got ideas for youtube comedy videos on my mind... here's one of my recent ones https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxNxrgC4I3Q

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:42:17 2018 No.10864518 >>10864490 Thanks. I thought no one would drag themselves through all that word vomit, but I appreciate it. I’ll take your advice.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:43:20 2018 No.10864521 >>10864500 quite the opposite, I scorned my peers and now would like to have experienced that young love, petty and paltry as it seems

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:44:50 2018 No.10864522

>>10858545

absolutely anon, amen. and i feel like it's almost a rousseau-ian "can't go back-ness" feel that's attached to this.

>>10858902
wow anon that's really sad. but seriously you'll get over this

>>10862002
hm unfortunate. stop watching movies anon
>>10862147
excellent contribution, thank you anon!

>>10863520
would be itneretsed in hearing mpre about this anon. down for irc

>>10864518
no problem. and that is genuine advice. we are locked in the physicality of ~being~, may as well help yourself! :)

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:45:33 2018 No.10864523 MUH HUMUN CUNDISHUN

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 04:58:32 2018 No.10864557 >>10862817 And a lot of extroverts are weirdos. Your lack of experience here doesn't make this wrong.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 05:03:13 2018 No.10864572 >>10862198 >>10862339 >>10862828 >>10862845 >anon offers helpful advice to another anon >autistic reeeeing ensues like clockwork. You're all crabs in a bucket

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 05:28:21 2018 No.10864628 it's been 12 fucking days and my keats collection has yet to arrive fucking BEZOS YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 05:36:01 2018 No.10864646

>>10853508
my ex and my old friends stalked me off internet and this kinda lead me into a spiral of depression because I think i had did everything that I could to get rid of them.

I was quite happy that I'm free for a few months before I found that still been obsessing about me again.

I do no harm to no one. Just leave me for fuck sake. I am fucking happy with their shit ass loitering me around.

I just wanna be alone.

They're philistine too, so we could never get along, like i learn nothing from them. Plus, I'm a marxist now so..

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 07:22:22 2018 No.10865005 >>10863901 It'd enable my behavior. I wouldn't have to worry abour disappointing, alienating, disgusting, or harming others, and would be free to do whatever I want.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 08:18:01 2018 No.10865188 >>10853508 Stretching and filling vaginas with a large penis. Beautiful and delicate femininity eclipsed, overwhelmed by a thick cock. Shrieking with pleasure the woman admits satisfaction she returns to public with her insides full of seed.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 09:10:51 2018 No.10865298 File: 241 KB, 640x720, 2C83C347-2AFA-4C02-9BE1-3E069D9B807D.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Are all these threads the work of just one person and is it the one replying to them all?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 09:12:04 2018 No.10865303 >>10864040 "I miss the comfort in being sad"

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 09:40:05 2018 No.10865394 >>10865298 You mean you haven't realized? There's only about 9 people other than you on the entirety of 4chan.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 09:41:08 2018 No.10865396 >>10864040 I've found that when you're depressed, it's the only time you see the world for what it truly is.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 09:42:24 2018 No.10865402 >>10854638 Get a gf.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 09:46:38 2018 No.10865412 >>10865396 Go to a doctor Get prescribed AD Take your half a gramme a day Then you’ll see what the works for what it truly is

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 11:34:01 2018 No.10865811 my barber gave me a gay fucking Richard Spencer undercut. Might as well start buying Fred Perry polos now because I look like a real faggot!

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 11:49:10 2018 No.10865886
File: 94 KB, 224x216, wojakeotw.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>mfw having sex with an older woman, the first other partner after losing my virginity
>mfw next morning i ask her if there was anything i could have done better
>mfw she says "bigger equipment?" and puts on a stupid haha im giggling face

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 11:49:45 2018 No.10865891

I'm really not going anywhere in life. Even the baby steps I'm taking are slowed down because I have to drag my family's and my gf's expectations of me with me. This isn't going to end well, I know it, I know that I don't want to do what I currently do, but I have no credible alternative.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 11:51:40 2018 No.10865897 >>10859439 sounds comfy as fuck desu senpai

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 12:08:48 2018 No.10865956 >>10865891 >gf fuck off normie no one cares

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 12:10:50 2018 No.10865963 >>10853508 I'm being forced to understand I might fulfill the stereotype of the bitter, broke artist after all

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 12:11:18 2018 No.10865964 >>10853508 that is a fucking super cute kitty cat

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 12:13:47 2018 No.10865973 >>10865964 Cats are too fucking good for this world. Actually come to think of it feral cats are a perfect microcosm of the human condition: the potential to be pure and good but corrupted by the harshness of their environment.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 12:20:47 2018 No.10865996 >>10865956 pls

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 13:02:32 2018 No.10866141 >>10853508 I wonder what it'd feel like to scrub your eyelids with steel wool until you peeled them off

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 13:42:48 2018 No.10866289

Failure, failure, death.
What a lovely life I've lived.
Til I draw my final breath,
I will fail with all I can give.

Like an angel. Some fire,
sparked by Prometheus.
What magic they conjure,
and weave dirt into souls,
the gift of life. Such grace
does not extend to all. Those
Not worthy must shudder in darkness.

No one told me.
I was supposed to know.
Such a fool at age three,
Might as well just go.
Stupid little kid,
look at him playing.
Didn't he have ears,
to hear what we were saying?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 13:47:27 2018 No.10866303 >>10853527 Social media is complicit in the overt politicization of everyday life. It is a cancer that's been gone untreated for too long and is now terminal.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:14:24 2018 No.10866374 I'm on a bus, listening to mgmt and googling what exactly a flanger does.

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:22:38 2018 No.10866407

>>10853508
if the system is crooked and demands us to comply to their terms, would it be alright not to? for the obvious fact that its unreasonable and logic itself disapproves on its terms.
And if you dont go rouge and comply, does that really make you a better man?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:24:37 2018 No.10866413 File: 7 KB, 165x306, download (2).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10866407 >go rouge

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:30:23 2018 No.10866440 I HATE MY JOB

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:34:37 2018 No.10866458
File: 32 KB, 653x490, 1486646778574.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>fucked it with the girl of my dreams, still think about her even though it's been a year
>all of my friends drifting away from me
>haven't done anything social since January
>realised that I will never be a socially developed adult because I never went to parties, had sex, or got a girlfriend when I was in my teenage years
>dreaming about ordering a nitrogen canister and just finishing it all
>exams that effectively determine my whole life coming up and I know I will not do remotely well in them
>tfw

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:38:23 2018 No.10866473 >>10866458 >haven't done anything social since January 2 whole months!

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:41:41 2018 No.10866483

>>10866473
I live in a historic town in the suburbs of western europe
There's fuck all to do here, except go to a cafe, the library, the chemist, or maybe take a bus to the city.
The two friends I have here are all preoccupied with their girlfriends, parties, sports, work and other social commitments
I spend my weekends working and staying up to 2 in the morning feeling sorry for myself
Maybe I will leave the house to walk in the woods near me
Such is life

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:41:47 2018 No.10866484
File: 1.18 MB, 3024x4032, D133BC57-6EE9-49BC-ADBB-3751D620B683.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

TURNING 27 SOON
I HATE MY JOB
I HAVE NO OTHER PROSPECTS
MY WRITING HAS GONE TO SHIT
MY GIRLFRIEND IS LEAVING ME

LIFE HAS BECOME A NEVER ENDING NIGHTMARE OF RELENTLESS MUNDANITIES

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:43:58 2018 No.10866488 >>10866473 try 25 years

>>	uh bro !!LgnwiD2BeDK Mon Mar 19 14:44:27 2018 No.10866493 >>10866484 uh bro are you in prison right now

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:44:54 2018 No.10866496 >>10866483 I'm just bitter anon, i've gone out once socially in the past 6 years

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:45:20 2018 No.10866500 >>10866493 NOT PHYSICALLY, WHY DO YOU ASK

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:50:26 2018 No.10866524 >>10866458 >>10866483 You just described me to a T anon, even my living situation. I'd offer to be your friend but I live in burgerland.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:53:42 2018 No.10866538 omg my brain is shortening cake

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:56:58 2018 No.10866549

>>10866524
There have to be more like us somewhere.
>>10866496
The thing is, I'm neither an outcast or a normal person. I have friends, sure, but they are moving on and developing and I'm not. I'm still KHV. Two years ago, somebody reported me to the headmaster because they thought I was a school shooter. Of course, I wasn't. But that tells you a lot about me, or rather what people think of me.
I just don't want to die alone having lost all my friends, having never known what it feels like to be loved.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:58:35 2018 No.10866557 >>10866484 Kek Get it together man you still have 3 years

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 14:58:49 2018 No.10866559 Should I join the peace corp /lit/?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 18:16:00 2018 No.10867604 >>10866559 join the FFL instead

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 19:29:04 2018 No.10867997
File: 1.36 MB, 1800x1191, Saul_Leiter_New_York_50s.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10855025
>>10858104
>>10859026
thank u!

>>10855035
i don't know what you're referring to, im afraid.

what's on my mind:
this is the first poem ive written of my own volition. i might anonymously post it in my STEM course's groupchat. sometimes people post erotica reworded with nerd references, so i don't think it's much of a leap to make.

i no longer have a crush on the girl. i don't know if that is a good thing. (her name is not polly)

ive recently realised that, for my gender, I am abnormally high in neuroticism

i started a short story high and i think it's pretty good

i am an only child, so my parents can't disown me if they find out i smoke. otherwise, they would

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 20:55:57 2018 No.10868293 >>10867604 That seems completely backwards from what I want to do, unless the FL does humanitarian work I'm not aware of.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 21:05:40 2018 No.10868333 >>10853712 go back to your circlejerk lainchan (read: arisuchan, because your admins are a cabal of the same few people arguing about pointless shit)

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 21:44:31 2018 No.10868483 >>10867604 France don't seem worth fighting for

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 22:06:32 2018 No.10868572

I feel so inexplicably drawn to the past, like I can't help but think that my life would have been better if I was born a couple decades ago. No widespread use of computers, no social media, calling people to keep in touch, easier to get work, the world still feeling quite big and mysterious, better prospects in academia (sounds like getting a professorship these days is fucking impossible), etc. I'm sure this is a brainlet romanticized view of a time I didn't live in, but fuck it feels like things have got worse for people with my personality and interests, you know?

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 22:10:07 2018 No.10868589 File: 464 KB, 500x338, 8edb7c9287dc2a50.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10868572 Forgot my picture

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 19 23:18:20 2018 No.10868870 My wife's recent run of awful luck has destroyed my sense of agency and my hopes that I could ever protect her in times of need. But at least I'm playing piano and exercising again.

Anonymous Mon Mar 19 23:42:21 2018 No.10868970

>>10864522

>wow anon that's really sad. but seriously you'll get over this

the weird part is I got over it over two years ago

for some reason the anguish and regret whirled like a cyclone right back into my mind the other night—which is odd because I rarely think about it usually

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 20 00:04:21 2018 No.10869087 File: 64 KB, 1280x720, 1520307129751.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >she leaves in august >i don't know if i'll ever see her again after that i don't want you to leave

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 20 00:12:01 2018 No.10869130 >>10865886 older women, not even once

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 20 01:12:16 2018 No.10869307 >>10865886 How old is she? How old is you?

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/lit/ - Literature