Write what’s on your mind

File: 515 KB, 960x1280, 1520368884969.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 15:41:24 2018 No.10803932 [Reply] [Original]

Write what’s on your mind

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 15:44:43 2018 No.10803954 >>10803932 snif lick succ

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 17:43:46 2018 No.10804531
File: 121 KB, 709x765, 1491632553162.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

All of my ambitions have been destroyed career-wise.

Music? Art? Since everyone wants to do it, it's low-paid and competitive.

Math, philosophy, or some other academic work? Same as above. You have to be autistically devoted to your subject for your entire career and you have to deal with bureaucratic bullshit.

Programming? Computer science? Turns out the work is soul-sucking and you have to be around awkward nerds every day.

At this point I think I will just settle on being a code monkey because it pays a ton of money, and I can delude myself into thinking that I could get one of those fun jobs.

Fuck capitalism.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 17:51:22 2018 No.10804572

>>10803932
I have become increasingly interested in the thought process and lives of serial killers and mass murderers. The reasons behind their cruelty and actions fascinates me. What scares me is in some of their writings I agree with them, I originally thought my capability for violence is low. After thinking about it, I scare myself at the things I would be willing to do under the circumstances.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:00:04 2018 No.10804606 >>10803954 Is the amount of men with foot fetishes on the uptick these past few years or am I just noticing them more?

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:05:45 2018 No.10804632
File: 58 KB, 900x705, 54eac80d9a713eec49b4a3b1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10804606
i sometimes pretend to care about feet, farts or 'thicc' women for memetic purposes without actually subscribing to the preference in question.

i also like to remind people who get mad about anime that this is an anime site even though i don't care about anime at all.

i also like to take up multiple sides of the political spectrum, sometimes at the same time and sometimes even in the same thread.

the NSA must either think that i have multiple personality disorder, or that my apartment (i don't actually live in an apartment) contains a magnitude of shitposting neckbeards of wildly varying preferences and ideologies. while in reality i'm actually just autistic (i'm not, i'm actually schizoid) and having fun (although sometimes i carry out these behaviours with a 'neutral' facial expression and a relatively calm emotional state).

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:18:50 2018 No.10804694

>>10803932
It's so cold, like that chicken I bought yesterday, lifeless piece of meat. But its my grandmas leg, it is still attached to her, part of a human being, part of her. But it feels dead, bad blood flow, part of getting old, inevitability of life, fucking cold limbs. Her eyes still open, still looking around, more and more detached everyday, empty like a newborns, on a wrinkly excuse of a human. Life pouring away one drop a day. I hate touching it, Her feet became a bloody mess, nails are hurting Her toes, cold blood on my hands, must change patch. Expression of physical pain twists her sour face, the only emotion left to her, judges me, im really doing best I can. What for, so when she evenrtually dies, we can pat our backs and say we did everything to acomodate her? So we can have a couple of months of her agony to witness. "If we put her in a senior home she will be dead within weeks, I saw that on tv!". No those are skilled profesionals, it could have ease her pain. If they would kill her She would thank us for it. Time to change her diaper.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:21:36 2018 No.10804705 >>10804531 Capitalism fuked you.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:25:59 2018 No.10804728

>>10804572
If there is anything that Jordan Peterson that I agree with, it's that everyone is capable of evil. Serial killers and the like do what they do because they are capable of empathy; they take great pleasure in causing suffering in other people, taking away their hopes and dreams, etc. All you can do is look at such acts and tell yourself "that's pretty fucked up," even if a tiny, tiny part of you understands why they did it. Myself, I try to stay distracted from that uneasy feeling by turning my attention to the positive things in life.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:26:54 2018 No.10804732

I wonder a lot about Thomas Ligotti's sex life. Certainly now that he's pushing his advanced years, crippled by infirmity and gastric distress, his libido must be all but shriveled and dead. But what about twenty years ago? Thirty?

Particularly in his Nyctalops trilogy, he writes at length about obsessive, predatory relationships with women. Prostitution and repressed sexuality feature, albeit in subtle incarnations, in other of his stories. It's odd to me that no one has ever remarked on this - at least not in a journalistic sense.

Ligotti may present himself as dry, sardonic and almost academic in his pessimism, but he's still human after all, and the wilder qualities of the human spirit have a way of creeping in around the edges of his writing.

Anyway, it's something I think a lot about. I wish I had someone to talk to about it.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:27:00 2018 No.10804733 I came in my pants today in public.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:31:05 2018 No.10804756

>>10804728
his discussion about looking inwards for capable evil was what i was referring to when i searched myself. I do find their acts horrendous, and just the thought of being able to take away someones life, someone who has a family and take that way from them almost makes sick to my stomach. I mostly try and stay attached to the positive things as well, but i dont wish to shield myself from evil, but overcome it

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:36:13 2018 No.10804783 horace did nothing wrong

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:39:12 2018 No.10804800 >>10804606 You're just noticing them more because of 4chan. People like feet everywhere, all the time. Writing in longhand helps.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:40:45 2018 No.10804808 >>10804606 No. You're probably just noticing it now. There were always a few foot guys here throughout the years. It's quite fun to read what they write about feet and it stops being weird after a while.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:49:22 2018 No.10804848

>>10803932
Got a $100 order on Fiverr, already roughly one third finished and it's only been a few days. Feels good to make this kind of money from my writings, and it feels even better knowing that my average monthly income from my writings will continue to increase..

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:50:52 2018 No.10804855 >>10804848 >Fiverr I was literally just looking at this. Are you actually making decent money off of this?

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:52:56 2018 No.10804864

Some guy in some thread on another board say there was a sort of generic ebook library website software, you google the name of it and you find loads of websites running it. I remember having browsed those websites in the past, but I can't for the life of me remeber the name.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:54:30 2018 No.10804868 File: 79 KB, 470x736, 1502197031552.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] https://www.strikemag.org/bullshit-jobs What am I missing here? Everything he says seems correct. Isn't it naive to think nobody should work jobs they don't like?

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 18:55:43 2018 No.10804876

I'm beginning to understand how inescapable the prison of my mental illness really is. No matter my circumstances, or where I go, or who I'm with, my state of mind will always be the same. I could have whatever I aspire to have, and nothing would change. I exist in a constant state of heightened mental and emotional agony. I'm just so tired of every manic upswing being followed by a catastrophic crash.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:03:04 2018 No.10804897

>>10804606
Is there a name for a person who *doesn't* like feet?
It's so disgusting and debased one doesn't even want to acknowledge it by giving it space in the dictionary.
(A bit like Queen Victoria's attitude when she was presented with a bill outlawing homosexuality and lesbianism. She simply refused to believe that the latter existed, and crossed out all references to it before signing the bill. So lesbianism wasn't illegal in Victorian England. Well played, dumpy little queen!)

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:03:29 2018 No.10804899 >>10804868 Most people are pretty cruel and want you to work even if (or especially if) you don't like it because they themselves work so the rest has to be miserable as well.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:06:17 2018 No.10804910

>>10804855
Yeah, it took a while since of course when you start you have no reviews, but keep your prices low and conduct yourself well. Complete orders, earn reviews, and as you gain more reviews more people will be likely to give you a try. I'm at a point now where I'm making over $50 each month, and I have a funny feeling that $100 orders will be becoming more common for me and even more expensive orders will be coming my way as well. Looking forward to my first $150 one. It's great supplemental income, I'm doing what I love, it's extra experience, meeting potential repeat customers to make more money from them down the road by giving them the best product I possibly can... I mean, I can't think of any way of describing it outside of awesome!

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:07:30 2018 No.10804916

>>10804868
He's not wrong but he's rather naive in thinking there's a shadow cabal of 1% people keeping us down with their pointless job agenda. This something political activists have a hard time accepting: no one person or party is to blame for our current predicament. Yet time and again, we feel the need to delegate blame and allow our discontent to be co-opted by institutions that stand to gain from our confusion. It's a trap we created for ourselves and it's so elaborate and nonsensical in its design that I don't think anyone can ever be free from it.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:10:16 2018 No.10804923 I want some sort of bullshit pointless work-from-home-doing-something-weird job that doesn't require a college degree.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:16:59 2018 No.10804948
File: 2.62 MB, 261x200, terrific.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

PROS:
obtained gf
happy
got recognized the other day as "that guy from the band" by somebody who liked my band which was pretty cool

CONS:
grades in garbage
might be living on street soon
always hungry but also too stressed to eat

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:18:01 2018 No.10804952
File: 2.02 MB, 1920x1080, 1515577006826.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Waiting for a call from a potential employer
>He said he'd call sometime today but gave no real indication of when
>Just sitting at my computer being nervous, tapping my foot with music on I'm not actually listening to
>don't want to poop or go to the shops in case that happens to be the time he calls me
JUST CALL ME ALREADY

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:29:00 2018 No.10804987

>>10804952
Poop. You can mute the mic on your phone and still listen to what he says, so he won't hear you drop a log or flush. Get a glass of water, and drink small sips during the interview, if you are that nervous your mouth *will* get dry. Check the charge level on your phone/connect it to the charger. I just recently aced a videoconference interview, trust me.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 19:34:47 2018 No.10805007 >>10804987 Thanks mate I think I'll be alright once he actually calls, its just the suspense of waiting that's killing me

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:04:27 2018 No.10805106 >>10804923 Don't we all? I'd much rather work at home instead of sitting in an office for 8 hours even though I spend only 4 or so of those hours doing actual work anyway.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:07:12 2018 No.10805121

>>10804952
Fuck that shit. I'm already nervous enough with phone calls (with strangers) in general. Multiply that with the stress that goes with interviewing PLUS not knowing when they're calling and I'm all fucked up. Why didn't my parents just name me Chad???

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:09:54 2018 No.10805129

My father despises my wanting to write; not the act itself, but what it would take to do it. To quit my 9-5 slog and go back to a part time gig and spend the rest of the time writing. I didn’t ask for money or for help with finances. I don’t want those things. I just want my father’s support.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:15:48 2018 No.10805154 >>10805129 If he's not tangibly burdened by it then it's none of his business. He's getting worked up over nothing.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:18:26 2018 No.10805159 >>10803932 Question if i may. What do i call a world inhabited by elves and fairies and shit? Is it just middle-earth, or is that a specific place?

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:22:21 2018 No.10805171 >>10805154 I have a deep need for his support. I don’t know why.

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:37:55 2018 No.10805246
File: 14 KB, 216x234, 1516392708742.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>if you're just, like, content with your miserable existence as it currently stands, you'll be happy It all depends on yourself, bro, don't try to change your situation! :^)

Do people actually buy this?

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 20:48:38 2018 No.10805285 >>10805159 >Question if i may. What do i call a world inhabited by elves and fairies and shit? Fantasy. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_genres#Fantasy

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 21:00:10 2018 No.10805349 if my crypto shitcoins gamble pays off, I'm moving the fuck out dropping my job and going to school to become an actor

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 21:01:50 2018 No.10805363

Some weeks ago, I saw a thread on /ic/ asking why Japanese artists have a certain style to their drawings that Westerners can't recreate. A few people scolded the OP; Told him that skilled illustrators can recreate them flawlessly, and to stop buying into a fantasy that they know something we don't. That last bit, to me, is fascinating. When I was a kid first discovering the internet, looking up pictures of Japan and Korea, a curious thought occurred to me: They've figured it out. Everything was perfect, and filled one with a tremendous sense of beauty and melancholy. In those tired alleys and vast rice fields, there seemed to be a trace of the mystery of life itself. Yet the people who plan those alleys and work those fields are just like you and me. And the streets of European cities inspired a similar awe in me as well. While these things are guided by mankind to a large degree, the most captivating part of this is that it had to exist in nature before us so that we could discover it. Take the checkerboard pattern, for instance. I can't speak for others, but it has that mysterious sense to me as well. We use it for board games and as decoration, but its existence predates all of this, and no one knows why. And on rare occasions, when I find some incredible piece of art, I do not think "Look at what they've made!", but rather "Look at what they've found!". That all of our grand questions about the nature of life remain unsolved is almost endearing to me. How in this chaotic universe things come to make sense here and fall apart there is thrilling.

I'm not high or anything. It's just neat to think about this stuff every once in a while.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 22:04:16 2018 No.10805693 Asian women are so fucking sexually attractive. I'm not even a weeb.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 23:15:11 2018 No.10806038 >>10804632 Like Walt Whitman [you] are 'made of multitudes,' anon. Just like everybody else..

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 23:15:57 2018 No.10806042 >>10805246 There's some merit to it. But it sounds pretty insincere coming from the mouths of people who live lavishly at your expense.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 6 23:21:35 2018 No.10806067 >>10803932 I strongly dislike fetishists for reasons almost entirely unrelated to the actual sex acts themselves

Anonymous Tue Mar 6 23:25:08 2018 No.10806087

There's a girl I like at work who potentially likes me back, but we're both so socially inept that we can't communicate face to face. Plus she's got an autistic tech wizard boyfriend with a cushy government job, so whatever. Life hurts. This is just another drop in the bucket as far as whiny lovelorn posts on 4chan go.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 00:05:07 2018 No.10806249 >>10803932 Unpleasant. I find these pics obnoxious as a footfag. Unnatural. Rude.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 00:28:12 2018 No.10806344 >>10805285 Thats it? Theres no official word for that fantasy earth?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 01:24:29 2018 No.10806500 File: 18 KB, 208x300, Jacobi-208x300.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] My boy Jacobi is always on my mind

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 02:28:48 2018 No.10806664

>>10804632
Wait, how can you reconcile being a schizoid and being a regular poster? I thought schizoid's tried to avoid social interaction, I mean I know this isn't IRL social interaction, but if your not interested in other peoples thoughts and feelings (which is what I believe a characteristic of schizoid is) then why would you post ?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:15:34 2018 No.10807178 >>10804876 Do you have bipolar disorder?

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:25:56 2018 No.10807209

>>10803932
I just started reading Wuthering Heights and was shocked by how different it is compared to the works of the other Brontë sisters and Jane Austen. It was quite a welcome surprise.

Also, whenever I need to shit I have this weird need to share the fact with the rest of the world. I've never really told anyone however.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:32:14 2018 No.10807238 There is no longer a place for me to discuss books. /lit/ used to be slow but good fun. Now you can't mention even basic philosophy like stoicism without /pol/ coming in with memes. Reddit was never good. There is nowhere else.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:39:49 2018 No.10807255

>>10807238
Butthurt anon? It's not /pol/ shitting on stoicism, those faggots love that shit. You can tell because they always avatarfag with those angry Grecian statues while posting their misinformed nonsense. Go to their "book recomendations" threads - Meditations, every time.
Wise up kid... you're on 4chan. Expecting to get a beating by the meme team.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:41:28 2018 No.10807261

>>10804606
I have a foot fetish and, while I understand that this is "odd" in some way, I cannot comprehend why someone would not be attracted to feet. Everything I see listed about them that are "bad" are things that I perceive as good. It just doesn't make sense to me and I can't relate to it.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:46:23 2018 No.10807271

>>10807261
I'm a footfag too and I'm sexually attracted to the particulars of them, but I also think they just look aesthetically pleasing in the context of the whole body. The human form would be tragically incomplete without them.

It's funny though. I'm very picky. Some feet, when they are soft, nicely shaped, comely, sensitive and attached to a beautiful person can seem almost divinely perfect to me - but others, when marred by abjection, crudeness or uncleanliness revolt me. It's an incredibly fragile balance.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:49:55 2018 No.10807282 thinken about leaving university to focus on improving my physique and read books

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 06:56:50 2018 No.10807304
File: 60 KB, 654x960, 1488211170708.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>drop out of school
>can't get a job (even McDonalds wouldn't take me)
>mom gets sick of my shit and makes me go to the psychiatrist
>psychiatrist diagnoses me with schizoid personality disorder (bit of a meme diagnosis, to be honest)
>can't really help he says
>relationship with my mother and especially stepfather grows more strenuous the more I NEET
What's my endgame here, lads? Do I just jump off a bridge?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:01:20 2018 No.10807310 >>10807271 They have to be pretty bad for me to be revolted by them. It's kind of like with tits or something like that: there are great ones and okay ones, and the ones that are bad are just kind of ignored.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:05:27 2018 No.10807323

>>10807304
Try applying at a temp agency. I was out of work for almost a year; I applied at all kinds of places (McDonald's included) and I only got two or three interviews, none of which called me back. I applied at a temp agency and two weeks later they had a job for me in a factory making almost $12 an hour. I was fired from my last job and they didn't even give a fuck about that. They take a small portion of your paycheck so it's in their interest to find work for everyone who applies.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:06:30 2018 No.10807326 >>10807323 Also the job they found for me was temp-to-perm, meaning that once I stayed there long enough I became a permanent employee of the company. Not every job they send people to is one that is actually temporary and ends.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:28:42 2018 No.10807366

A girl came up to me in the study area and asked if she could tell me jokes and have me rate them on a scale of 1-5 and I was in severe psychic pain as she told me the jokes, and then another dude was next to me later and she asked him and he went BWA, HA HA HA I RATE THAT JOKE A 5 ;-) HEHEHE LIFE IS GOOD and I realized I am not living the same life as normies

This situation epitomizes a type of situation that constantly recurs in my life, where I hate something that everybody else likes and they accuse me of somehow FORCING myself to dislike it, of scowling and saying bah humbug and gritting my teeth when the funny Avengers Joss Whedon dialog happens so that I don't even crack a smile. Like the thing is objectively funny and there is nothing wrong with laughing at it just because it's frivolous or inane! I'm just being a spoilsport!

But it's genuinely not that. I've never forced anything. Those jokes sucked fucking dick. I wasn't scowling at her or waiting to pounce on her for not being a genius comedian. I was just in pain because the jokes sucked. I expected that other guy to be like me with slightly less blunted affect, to be more open to chuckling lightheartedly and going "Ha ha ha. I guess that one's a 4, because it sure made me chuckle!" I expected him to be about as amused as I was, but less bitter about the aftermath. No, he liked the joke. He actually liked it. I can't ever do what he did in that moment, which is actually find the joke's content to be surprising and good. Would flooding my brain with some kind of SSRI make me laugh more at a terrible joke whose punchline was obvious from the setup? Would walking around self-loathing about how I'm a scowling scrooge because I don't like Joss Whedon machine-generated dialog finally twist my brain around until I can enjoy it, when other people just enjoy it right away without effort because they simply, actually enjoy it? I've decided to live in the forest and not communicate with humans anymore.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:34:36 2018 No.10807385 >>10807366 When you interact with people you just have to wear a "mask" and act normal.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:37:59 2018 No.10807398 >>10803932 Is that picture some kind of fetish thing?

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:38:23 2018 No.10807402

>>10807385
I do that okay but for the past while I have also been monitoring the things that make normal people laugh and feel joy. Women especially will literally gut-laugh with total abandon, to the point of collapsing, just from talking normally with someone they are slightly more than acquaintances with. There doesn't need to be super good content or jokes. They are just that happy to be chattin' with some person they know.

I laugh that hard maybe once a year and then it's only when I'm watching some rare comedian it took me years to find because good comedians are so rare. Those people are in maximum joy mode nonstop every day. Relative to me, normal people are on meth as their natural baseline.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 07:41:57 2018 No.10807419

>>10807402
Yeah, I don't understand things like that. I just try to play along when I have to. It's hard, though. The worst thing for me is trying to make small-talk. That has always mystified me, how people can just go up to each other and talk about nothing like that.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 10:38:15 2018 No.10808087 >>10805693 ikr

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 10:41:44 2018 No.10808099 >>10807402 kek

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 12:07:15 2018 No.10808442
File: 189 KB, 957x960, celine hedgehog.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10806664
i am interested in other peoples ideas but i don't care much for small talk and maintaining relationships and the obligations that come with it.

4chan is great because i can shitpost with you lads about literature but also not have to buy clothes to go to your dumb wedding and talk about the weather with your aunt or something.

i also really really like animals, probably for related reasons.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 12:27:08 2018 No.10808517 >>10807366 what was the joke?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 12:38:30 2018 No.10808585 File: 44 KB, 500x556, 3489056368.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] I have been celibate since 2010.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 12:43:27 2018 No.10808614 >>10805363 You write very well, anon.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 12:52:02 2018 No.10808650 File: 2.00 MB, 299x224, 1512631823359.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10804632 >i also like to remind people who get mad about anime that this is an anime site even though i don't care about anime at all.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 12:54:42 2018 No.10808660 >>10804531 same anon. i think i'll just settle for some mindless bullshit job that allows me to slack off just to pay the bills and spend my attention on the things that interest me.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 12:57:19 2018 No.10808675

>>10806664
>>10808442
>Frequently, a schizoid individual's social functioning improves, sometimes dramatically, when the individual knows he or she is an anonymous participant in a real-time conversation or correspondence, e.g. in an online chat-room or message-board. Indeed, it is often the case the individual's online correspondent will report nothing amiss in the individual's engagement and affect.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizoid_personality_disorder

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 14:14:24 2018 No.10808981 I hope this shit doesn't splash

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 14:25:15 2018 No.10809019 >>10805171 >laughing_psychoanalysts.jpg >>10807366 Regardless of the content of the joke, you're definitely a spoilsport

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 14:42:37 2018 No.10809087

>>10807366
>Would flooding my brain with some kind of SSRI make me laugh more at a terrible joke whose punchline was obvious from the setup?

If the cause of you not laughing was depression and you would have found it funny if you weren't depressed, then probably yes. Otherwise probably not.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 15:20:58 2018 No.10809253 >>10808675 that's very accurate, almost thought you were bullshitting me. thanks anone

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 15:46:04 2018 No.10809353 >>10803932 Footpussy, thanks to you.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 16:05:51 2018 No.10809453 >>10808585 I have been celibate since 1995. Please end my life.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 16:07:00 2018 No.10809461 >>10809453 raves still exist tho

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 16:12:58 2018 No.10809490
File: 643 KB, 1022x731, tiresome.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I'm going to see a gender therapist in a week but I really hope they don't encourage me to start this transgender shit again, I don't want it to happen. I wish I could do something to take my mind off of this but I have literally no friends and live with my parents. I'm considering doing hrt as an antidepressant because none of the many others I have tried seemed to have any effect. I guess anything's better than compulsively checking my checking account to assure myself I still have enough money to buy a shotgun and shells.

I haven't finished writing any piece I've started in almost four months

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 16:28:35 2018 No.10809566 >>10804531 The only person stopping you is yourself. Try to succeed and either you’ll win or you’ll fail and become a coder anyways

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 16:37:36 2018 No.10809630 >>10803932 is that johnny depp?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:05:42 2018 No.10809795 >>10809453 >>10808585 why?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:09:24 2018 No.10809813 >>10809795 used to fuck thots, then had years of relationship and after that broke didn't want to get back into the shallow fucking game. decided it wasn't worth it. it's alright although i suspect i may be missing out on cuddle chemicals.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:13:46 2018 No.10809840 >>10809813 how old are you? do you jerk off or you havent had an orgasm in 8 years?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:35:37 2018 No.10809969 >>10809840 34 i jerk off mechanically sometimes for health reasons

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:41:16 2018 No.10810004

>>10809969
I'm 24 and I'm very sexual. I had relationships and lots of sex and now my life is complete ruin I'm thinking of going 100% celibate for a while and focusing on other shit for a while

maybe one day I'll meet a woman Ill want to marry or something, but chasing pussy in general is a waste of time

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:47:39 2018 No.10810048

>>10810004
I've found in the past that not being a desperate pussy hound anymore increased my ability to meet nice girls a lot.

It's great when you get to a position where any relationship with a woman is based on sincere affection and not a thirsty need to just have someone because you know you can be happy on your own.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:52:48 2018 No.10810080 >>10804531 fucking same

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:56:44 2018 No.10810101

>>10804531
dude, dedicate the next 3-10 years of your life to just making money, once you have a set up like some kind of passive income you can do whatever the fuck you want regardless if anyone pays you for it or not

I'm putting my savings into shitcoins and if it pays off I'm going to quit my job, move country be an actor

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:58:17 2018 No.10810104 >>10804606 Mine is of a different variety. These feet are nasty, dirty, an calloused. I like mine them clean, freshly pedicured a showered. Also don't like sweaty smell. gross.

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 17:59:58 2018 No.10810112

The girl I liked got RICED, and that made me lose interest. I'd like to find a new female companion, but I know that's an uphill battle. At the same time, I'd like to go back to just being content by myself.

>>10807419
>>10807402
What do people that have talked to you enjoy about you? Do you have a personal charm or wit? Why not run with that?

Anonymous Wed Mar 7 18:16:28 2018 No.10810186

I'm crossed, terribly crossed. After a demanding and costly education process, and a stent of unemployment, due to .gov labor statistics not quite aligning with the local economy, I'm now underemployed, playing servant to people I used to consider my equals. I was on track to surpass them, even. Now, I dread the humiliation of each new day.

Via an unspoken but city-wide caste-like system, they instantly know I shouldn't be here, that I must have done something wrong. Am I a felon? Did I steal? Rape? No, I simply haven't the nepotistic advantage.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 18:21:11 2018 No.10810208 >>10810101 the ERE pill is the greates of all unless you can be a welfare monkey

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 18:22:23 2018 No.10810211 >>10804948 harden the fuck up

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 18:25:18 2018 No.10810222 >>10805129 You dont need a part time. You just think you do

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 20:56:41 2018 No.10810921 >>10804855 Still working on the $100 order, but just tonight I got and filled an order for a short story. $40 for less than 5000 words, pretty amazing, and so far he seems to be loving it so that's great.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 21:01:20 2018 No.10810944 >>10803932 I am not completely averse to feet related sexual acts but fuck off with your dirty feet

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 21:12:41 2018 No.10810998 >>10803932 Get your DIRTY FUCKING feet OUTTA MY FACE!

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 23:02:26 2018 No.10811411 >>10804733 To see if I still feel. I focus on the pain. The only thing that's real.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 7 23:37:44 2018 No.10811593 >>10804733 well tell us the story bro

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 00:22:25 2018 No.10811744 >>10804606 Jewish pornography has destroyed many a man

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 00:38:20 2018 No.10811772

>Browsing 4chan
>See someone has posted a porn pic
>Click on thumbnail
>Stare at image for a couple seconds, unable to move or even think of anything
>Repeat this but now it's a hentai pic
>I now get stuck for like 5 seconds
>Unfreeze after struggling with all my might
>Now I'm on my bed, completely covered in my blankets, unable to move
>Through the blankets I can feel someone energetically rubbing my head while whispering unintelligible chants
>Wake up
What are you trying to imply here, brain?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 01:07:10 2018 No.10811842 >>10804531 >Computer science? That comes under 'math, philosophy, or some other academic work'.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 01:48:50 2018 No.10811928 My so-called friend seems to be trying to convert me to his fucking worthless cult of a religion, and I am deeply angry about it this time. I'm about ready to shout at him and tell him he's going to Hell.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 02:00:51 2018 No.10811952 >>10808675 wow, thats some good content, thanks my negroid.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 02:02:46 2018 No.10811955 >>10804632 based. schizoids is the one and only redpill personality.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 04:11:44 2018 No.10812220 >>10807366 I understand you and expect to die alone

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 04:17:51 2018 No.10812233 >>10804531 I see a kid coming out of high school with surface level knowledge on things he’s interested in and yielding at the slightest signs of a challenge.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 05:54:52 2018 No.10812545 >>10812233 it ain't that easy, I'm in the boat you describe and am simply devoid of passion, all my challenges seem to be passive and soft when I would prefer a solid and assertive aim, if you catch my drift

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 05:59:45 2018 No.10812550 that also applies sexually

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:20:55 2018 No.10813003 >>10811411 underrated

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:25:19 2018 No.10813010 >>10811928 what religion cuck

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:26:21 2018 No.10813013 >>10809490 >I haven't finished writing any piece I've started in almost four months tfw

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:26:51 2018 No.10813014

I'm a first year PhD student in a top 10 university in a field of biology. It's a massive step up from what has been expected of me in my life so far, and the stress, while not great is manageable. I'm making considerably below minimum wage.

Even though the program is only 3 years, and I can jump ship to industry for megabux as soon as I'm done, I still feel like I'm wasting my time on some level. Everyone I know who didn't go for an advanced degree is making great money in the private sector, and here I am with no friends in another country working a job I don't like for essentially no money. It's not that I'm unhappy, I like the solitude as it lets me focus on my personal interests when I have free time, but the lack of friends is getting to me. I used to make a lot of friends wherever I went, but at some point along the line something changed, I didn't have the enthusiasm or energy for it anymore. It bothers me a little that I've changed in this way.

I just want to make enough money to buy some property or some other form of passive income so I can live out my days in peace and quiet.
The Tolstoy life is the life for me.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:35:42 2018 No.10813036

>>10810186

Preach. After I finished university I spent a while washing cars at a used car dealership while everyone I went to university with was succeeding. It'll get better. Find another job, one that lets you progress. It isn't easy, but it is possible.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:40:31 2018 No.10813052 >>10809453 same

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:43:14 2018 No.10813064
File: 37 KB, 236x217, 1421505582701.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10808675
Either these definitions(this one and other disorders I read about on wiki) are bullshit, that is, these collections of characteristics apply to many people and shouldn't be considered serious disorders, or I'm a shizoid, among other things. Really activates my almonds

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:44:12 2018 No.10813068 >>10803932 finally got my driver's licence with the third try, gonna celebrate at the weekend with some Emma and what not else

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:49:03 2018 No.10813086 File: 19 KB, 400x400, 1513964987260.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10810101 If you put anything more into crypto than you're totally prepared to lose, you're a retard.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 09:51:43 2018 No.10813092

What gives value to a thought?
If I say nihilism bro I will be a faggot but if Nietzsche says it then he is hailed as a genius.
Is it all related to context and how good you're at putting your thoughts?
Or you have absolutely no control over the value of your thought? Is it just like every other commodity where the free market decides the value.
If its a a commodity like any other then nothing can be more depressing than that.
Words have power and if that power can be controlled by the ones in power like a commodity then what chance does a man have in this wretched society?

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 10:32:45 2018 No.10813238

>>10804531
you're not really interested in anything or you'd like the challenge

Capitalims "fucks" you because that's the excuse for yourself because you're not good enough. The world does not function according to your needs and emotions but what is asked in reality.

This is an unhealthy attitude and it looks as if you'd think the world is owing you something.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 10:36:17 2018 No.10813254 >>10813238 Yes, the world, society and the system is completely without blame and fault. No need for any changes. I've deposited 5 tokens into your shill account.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:09:14 2018 No.10813380
File: 193 KB, 800x800, BEER ON THE RUG - µ£¡σ╣îπé│πâ│πâåπâ│πâ¢πéÜπâ⌐πâ¬πâ╝ - folder.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>forgot how good this album is

i had a weird dream i vaguely remember of getting sort of sexually assaulted by some milf adjunct at an academic conference, the most disturbing part is i'm reaching that age where milf professors are more age appropriate than students, disturbing on several fronts

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:11:55 2018 No.10813385 >>10803932 I'm 19 and can't get erections. I've tried to have sex on 13 separate occasions and ruined each relationship BECAUSE I CAN'T GET HARD. WHY GOD WHHHYYYYYYYY

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:15:03 2018 No.10813402 >>10813385 maybe you're meant to be a be a power bottom tranny, trying letting a dude ram ur ass next time

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:15:22 2018 No.10813406
File: 270 KB, 1200x798, 81EA116C-B1CF-400C-9616-563399AA208C.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I didn’t know that it was actually possible to have all your tears dry up. Friend killed him self recently and I didn’t even feel sad about it. I was just empty, and then I went on with my day, it was like I was just like meursault from the stranger but was aware of my inappropriate thoughts and behavior.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:17:29 2018 No.10813414 File: 1.55 MB, 1337x1020, 1519925580508.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10813402 I've unironically tried to fuck a guy before because I thought I might be gay and not know it. NOPE, not gay, just can't get hard.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:18:55 2018 No.10813420 >>10813406 suicides tend to take a while to kick in emotionally, at first ur just like "woah what a nut lol" then later ur like "man what a bummer" then later ur like "oh well fuck it thats life"

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:21:46 2018 No.10813436 >>10813420 Are you drunk? Anyway yeah maybe it’s delayed

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:22:34 2018 No.10813441

>>10813414
hey man ur kinda lucky, whenever i'm alone with some chick and there's a chance to fuck i get a massive bone, which then requires me to retreat, idk it's hard to time an erection for that sweet spot thats not too soon so ur look like a perv poppin wood the second u get the door closed, to some disinterested homo who doesn't even have it up by the time the chick is nude...idk i just fap now, i dont even bother with getting laid

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:26:06 2018 No.10813454 File: 170 KB, 734x794, 1505574810457.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10813441 >ur kinda lucky how can you call this lucky, so many opportunities with women have been ruined over this. I want to fuck so badly but MY DICK WON'T WORK

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 11:31:52 2018 No.10813474

>>10813254
don't be childish, capitalism may not be without fault compared to a perfect system, which obviously is unknown to us but capitalism is empirically the best.

Also it's better to let yourself help you than be dependent on a system to help you. And when you've got a system that helps you and you start whinig then you're a crybaby little bitch with no energy.

Think about it. All you say is, that another person (society) is unfair because he's not working for you and supporting you (as in taxes) for a painting (or whatever result of your work) that noone wants.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 12:50:51 2018 No.10813699 i was so happy to see that douchebag sherman alexie got smoked by #metoo, u could just tell he was the kind of fag who would do all kinds of creepy inappropriate shit with women

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 13:51:22 2018 No.10813939 >>10804897 so what happened when two chicks got caught making out?? could they just be like, "this isn't illegal actually" or were they punished anyway?

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 14:06:12 2018 No.10813985

>>10804531
lmao

hahaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaa
you never had any ambitions

>muh GABIDALIZZZZZZZZZZZZMMMM

kys just simply kys
if you're not smart enough to figure shit out it just means you're a mediocre man
go join your local antifa and start taking trannypills
you'll feel better afterwards
go do it
FUCK CAPITALISM
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 14:12:10 2018 No.10814012 All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 14:12:20 2018 No.10814013 >>10813454 Dude just go the doctor and get some Viagra, I did it when I was 19 and depressed - He gave me a free sample pack of two. Used half a pill and everything worked. Confidence boost was huge and didn't need it after

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 14:28:28 2018 No.10814070 >>10811411 You can have it all. My empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will jack off in public.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 14:32:49 2018 No.10814090

>>10811593
Not much to tell.
Havn't jerked off in ages. Horny as fuck.
On the bus.
Group of hot friends get on. 2 of them sit in front of me.
Low key jerk it.
Spurt semen up the back of the seat.
One girl quickly glances over her shoulder so i tuck my dick away and pretend to be watching something out the window, all the while still jizzing in my pants.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 15:26:53 2018 No.10814315

>>10812545
You need to throw yourself out into the world and gain real experience traveling, working, and interacting with people. Joseph Conrad would have never written a single masterpiece had he never learned to sail. I don’t understand people who think they can write well just sitting comfortably in their lives.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 15:33:46 2018 No.10814349 >>10813064 >hese collections of characteristics apply to many people and shouldn't be considered serious disorders it's a disorder when the characteristic disturbs your life.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 15:43:50 2018 No.10814393 >>10804606 I've noticed it declining on 4chan myself. /tv/ used to have foot fag generals 24/7.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 17:47:30 2018 No.10815060 >>10814090 what the fuck

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 17:49:15 2018 No.10815069

>>10803932
Same as everyone else; I'm depressed but won't do anything to change it and I'm afraid of failure so I won't even try for the grand dreams I have in my head which require failure in order to eventually achieve - and of course I'm blaming all my problems on the fact I have no money (see: won't do anything to change it).

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 17:50:09 2018 No.10815076 >>10815069 Speak for yourself anon

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 18:05:17 2018 No.10815158 >>10815076 fuck a shit, anon.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 18:26:35 2018 No.10815265 >>10804632 Wait, people post that shit unironically? I'm pretty sure you don't have to be schizoid to brap-post for the lulz. Everyone embellishes and switches their political stance on this Portuguese birthday card vendor site

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 18:28:50 2018 No.10815274 >>10815158 I’m sorry, what?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 18:34:47 2018 No.10815304 >>10815274 FUCK A SHIT, ANON (have intercourse with a turd, anonymous user)

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 18:50:00 2018 No.10815367 >>10815304 Ohhh

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 18:58:29 2018 No.10815416

>>10814315
There are countless writers who are better than you will ever be and didn't follow this stupid Ernest Hemingway fantasy. Borges lived with his mommy and worked a part-time job. Pessoa was an autistic manchild virgin. Lovecraft and Proust were NEETs. Cormac McCarthy leeched off his wife and lived in a shack. etc

The only key to writing well is talent and practice. You're not going to be a good writer because you sucked off some monk Czechoslovakia and swam with dolphins in Chile. Stop reading Vice

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 19:03:54 2018 No.10815449
File: 852 KB, 984x720, title.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10803932
>Describe a depressive episode
At first it’s a black fog of frustration and disorder, occasionally pierced by pangs of extreme self-disgust. You’re itchy, you’re confused, you’re distracted, you’re bored. You repeat the same tired behaviors your meat forever demands from you—feed, shower, shit, jerk off, entertainment. Your head is rotting away and everybody smells it. You smell it. It makes you sick. You hate yourself, virulently hate yourself, and want so desperately for the thoughts to stop. Maybe you even begin to consider methods, tools. How much does a shotgun cost? How does one actually go about obtaining a gun permit? You’ve read about people who misfire and fuck up the kill, so how do you make sure you do it right? Where and when would you do it, and who would discover the body? Somebody has to.

But it’s only another fantasy, and to struggle towards it is as useless as every other hurt you’ve endured up until now. Your cowardice wins out, like it always does, and gradually you enter the next and quieter stage. Your failing will ebbs away to oblivion. Calmly you extinguish your hopes (even of death), calmly you extinguish your self and its unfulfilled ambitions, vaguely glad to be putting these frivolities behind you. There is nothing to regret because there is nothing to want. There is no hot shame because there are no expectations for yourself. There is nothing to fear because Hell has already arrived. You are an insentient fleck of organic matter who exists to suffer, consume, and die. The fog doesn’t clear, but it grows so dense you are not even sure it’s there, and the itching stops. You are still. A kind of holy consciousness sweeps over you. You’re freed from life, freed from hope, your future, your past. You only are. One day you will not. One day soon, probably sooner than you expect.

You smile.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 19:31:10 2018 No.10815591 >>10815416 I disagree. You need to know what the fuck you’re talking about. Exposure to the world is critical.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 19:39:22 2018 No.10815643

>>10812233
>yielding at the slightest signs of a challenge
I yield at the slightest sign of challenge because I then have to consider if it will be worth the time and effort to go through that challenge. Jumping head-first into something challenging without knowing what it will amount to seems foolish to me. I know I won't want to deal with the bullshit in academia, for example, so I will quit that pursuit while I'm ahead.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 19:42:26 2018 No.10815660 >>10813474 >Also it's better to let yourself help you than be dependent on a system to help you. Ah, right. So I should "work hard" and become a wage slave. Great logic.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 20:13:23 2018 No.10815791
File: 206 KB, 380x364, Infans_Philosophicus_tres_agnoscit_patres,_ut_Orion.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10804632
The testing of characters I call it. We are all doing it, some subtly and without being conscious of it, others consciously producing the fiction that, now begun, will totalize the internet, become expected, and, when then, each Becoming have then become an event that, yes, Heidegger would appreciate, though maybe as an absurd deifying of an idea he may or may not have had in the past, we play ourselves into children unbounded, uninhibited non-personae agent emulation's centre interrelated relationship feedback randomiser within that system of digital imagination, the Place Of Screens, presence reaching the space as black gates.

---

Fakenews is lies.
The liar does not pretend.
A pretension masquerades.
He wears his face seriously.
He is on the internet now.
The absence is him.
But not his words.
The absence is ahead in time a fraction of a second, and in it, your body experiences the world.
Behind this is the centred you that experiences yourself and your relation to yourself experiencing the world.
On the internet, you are not being conscious but a being who is consciousness if your being has become conscious of this separate instance that all cannot exist within without becoming knotted.
Back asswards eating apples full of theorems, collecting data poison, ungodly unpredictable dropping decision trees severed stomach, predictable gas and PPP, always with the jokes and smiling mostly.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHT-xeU1LEk

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 21:03:21 2018 No.10815970 >>10815660 >automatically equates the concept of working hard for working for someone else I can’t even imagine being trapped in such a pitiful mental state.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 22:55:22 2018 No.10816312

>reading a delightful little novel by Alfred Camus
>notice an upset girl at school yelling at her boyfriend
>her naive fieriness rings true within me
>the Beast awakens, and I hunger once more.
>I analyse her movement patterns for the next week
>find her in the library talking with a friend
>I move like a walking shadow, crushed velvet blazer camouflaging me completely
>"Hello. You have the eyes of a hunter, child"
>she is so enamoured by my guileish charms that she and her friend begin to laugh
>I smirk goodnaturedly. How humoreux. How quaint.
>Invite her for dinner. A quick.... bite.
>She laughs. I just keep staring.
>Her oafish boyfriend appears.
>"Get the fuck out of here anon"
>"Perhaps"
>i keep on smirking. A single strike to their jugulars and the talking sheep could be slain.
>He punches me.
>Eye swollen up - I steam a small bag of petit pois beside the bruise.
>A brilliant multitasker, as always.

Anonymous Thu Mar 8 23:07:27 2018 No.10816347
File: 81 KB, 1024x1002, 1520385953829.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>pay someone to write an essay for me despite having had months to write the first draft
>they hand me the essay
>mediocreasfuck.jpg
>whatever they have better work ethic than i do
>revise the essay to make it seem like i wrote it and to allow for a more comprehensive answer regarding the topic at hand
>dont finish
>final draft due next week
>teacher who i havent seen in days gets angry with me not showing up and makes me turn it in anyway
>peer review
>turn it in to some girl
>have to stand there while this shit essay is criticised under the premise of being my work
>cant defend the writing because its not up to par
>cant tell them its not my work
>"H-haha, yeah, don't know what I was thinking when I wrote that. Oops."

they think im brainlet now but for the wrong reasons

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 8 23:08:52 2018 No.10816353 >>10814393 Fuck, 4chan is a strange place.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:00:55 2018 No.10816514 >that feel when u tryna jack it to some sodomy porn but u blow a fart and the smell reminds u how disgusting anal sex actually is i really wanted to get a nut off tonight but maybe it wasn't meant to be

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:08:18 2018 No.10816548
File: 1.02 MB, 2816x2112, manhattan.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10804531
Anon this has absolutely shattered me. I was an arts major but doubled in math because I thought it would get me a better job. As it turns out all I want to do with math is what I wanted to do with art, study it as long as I can. So I turned to computer science. Now I am some software engineer and design stuff I could care less about. Some small consolation to this souless work is that I am not expected to work 60 hrs a week and so have a nice amount of free time. I am reminded of Wallace Stevens (or someone else who I am confusing) writing great poetry while wokring a similarly bland job.

All I can say is stay true and exercise. Everything else falls into place.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:11:50 2018 No.10816563 >>10816548 >mfw ppl think they will get a job with a math degree lollllll enjoy teaching high school math

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:15:11 2018 No.10816576 im a strange boy

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:15:52 2018 No.10816580 >>10816347 disgracefur, i’ve cheated on tests before as a HS student but i would never pass off someone else’s writing or long answers as my own (incl math and sci the subjects i cheated most in)

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:16:28 2018 No.10816582 >>10816563 I realized this, why I now work in comp sci.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:20:09 2018 No.10816590

Spiritually, physically, and emotionally, we are closer to worms than we are to god. I accept our divine mediocrity. But it's tough. it is tough . We will never truly know things. We will never truly feel things. We only categorize things through our own personal classifications. Nothing is truly objective. My mind is a swamp. Your mind is no better. Stop lying to yourself. I wish people would tell the truth more often. Society is absolutely fucked. It's tough

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:23:53 2018 No.10816598 >>10803932 I’m not fine.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:25:27 2018 No.10816603 >>10816590 our minds are shit but our consciousnesses themselves are the same thing as God

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:26:26 2018 No.10816612 The only real friend I've made in this city is a crazy old man who is also a scientologist. Last night we were at a bar and he started to get weepy while talking about reincarnation. I didn't like it at all.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:27:04 2018 No.10816614 >>10803932 Should a person who enjoys pain be stopped from hurting himself?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:29:30 2018 No.10816621 >>10804531 Without capitalism you would be stuck half starved trying to harvest rice barefoot >Fuck capitalism Fuck your spoiled ass

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:44:59 2018 No.10816664 >>10804531 >whining about the fact that there's competition and you actually have to be significant to make it in your profession kill yourself

>>	OP is a faggot Fri Mar 9 00:47:49 2018 No.10816670 >>10816603 no, how conceited >>10816621 no, I'd be living in a villa >>10816664 same fag?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:49:38 2018 No.10816676 >>10816670 No, just upset that someone is complaining about how something is hard to get into because evwybodys doin it nao :(( That's how it fucking works. If 99 people can produce art as mediocre as yours, why should we pay you?

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:51:16 2018 No.10816685
File: 145 KB, 600x600, 600x600.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

The constant over empathy we are forced to ahead to because of the different groups and acceptance of distorted features creates over-socialization and manipulates our sense of tribe ( which I believe humans to be most happy and natural in) and places unnatural pressures on the mind of modern urbanized people. This plays a role in the great number of suicides of the modern world, not out of shame or relief from torture like in history but out of a rejection of a life so comfortable and materialistically rewarding, the action, stemming from unnatural constraints placed on a reality we are no longer in control of. *Social isolation on such a mass scale is only possible because of societal guilt, we are shamed into working for something which has no intrinsic meaning to us, we can only be happy by being slaves to things to care for ourselves of family * the struggles presented to us in this post-industrial age are artificial they have no meaningful deep consequence for us besides absolution from societal guilt, the same guilt that perpetuates suicides and the epidemic of the mind. Prescribed mortality is the death of *right and wrong*it dampens our natural instincts of what right and wrong is, of course these feelings are molded by events in the individuals life but there are also right and wrongs that hold purpose, if we participate in incest our children will be deformed, this is a natural instinctive crime against nature, murder is not a crime against nature, it is who your murder, the functionality of the murder, the level of depravity and the negative or positive influence of the murder on the surroundings, the act is not by itself a crime against nature, we have more than enough people, it is a crime to the individual and if this murder affects the nature (be it society, outdoors, the accessibility of food) in a negative way then it is a true crime but likewise if the murder brings about positive effects and benefits those who were not benefitted before the murder if the culprit could perceive this justice or injustice before the action of murder is irrelevant. If one decides to do nothing but rely on welfare do not feel ashamed we are neutered and corporate welfare is not different.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:52:23 2018 No.10816688 >>10816670 >Competition is a bad thing >I need to be actually good at something :( Oh boy, no wonder losers and soyfags are all for povert- I mean communism

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:54:57 2018 No.10816694

I'm afraid of sleep and I don't know why.
I sit in front of the computer until I can't even look at the screen anymore and then I go to bed with my phone and the lights turned on so I can't accidentally fall asleep, sometimes I fall asleep anyways but I manage to shake myself awake
I end up sleeping very little every night because I force myself to wake up after 4 or 5 hours and then once or twice a week I sleep the entire day since I can't keep myself awake

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:56:20 2018 No.10816702 >>10816694 iktf, i dont even have nightmares or anything, just afraid of laying there and not sleeping

OP is a faggot Fri Mar 9 00:56:25 2018 No.10816704

>>10816676
first premise in the last line I disagree with, its just a blanket statement

second premise is predicated upon a stupid disposition, artists and many other types are not even human, what they have to say shouldn't bother you. Your conclusions are retarded, not even guaranteed by your premises but I do agree that artists are worthless and their complaining is always in poor taste, if even ugly and worthy of retaliatory humiliation for the trouble they cause your psyche.
>>10816685
this is less intelligent ted, try harder

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:59:29 2018 No.10816713 >>10816704 try for what? just giving my feelings as the thread says. if you think you are more intelligent by criticizing 4chan posts then jeez i dont know what to say

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 00:59:36 2018 No.10816714

>>10816670
You would be just another peasant who doesn't even know how to read
Thanks to capitalism you can walk into a bookstore and buy as many old books as you like cheaper than toilet paper not to mention just downloading them in digital form which makes books last forever and let's you instantly make as many copies as you want
One would think that a board about literature would appreciate capitalism a little more

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:01:26 2018 No.10816718 >>10816702 I fall asleep instantly, I'm not afraid of going to sleep or not being able to sleep I think I'm kind of afraid of waking up

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:02:35 2018 No.10816723

I didn't have the heart to be honest with a classmate today and I'm so fucking disappointed in myself. All I had to say was that I don't think the question is appropriate, that the issue isn't global, that they're focusing too much on the US, and that they're not being specific enough, but I didn't want to make myself look like an asshole. I'm such a fucking pussy.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:02:44 2018 No.10816724 >>10816713 yes I am more intelligent than you >>10816714 no my ancestors were spanish nobility and rich jews, I wouldn't be

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:04:15 2018 No.10816731 >>10816724 ok, psycho

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:04:58 2018 No.10816733 >>10816724 And every single person on Britain has royal blood

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:07:53 2018 No.10816738 >>10816724 >no my ancestors were spanish nobility and rich jews, I wouldn't be if ur ancestors were so great why r u such a loser now then? >i_might_be_a_loser_in_your_world_but_in_1276AD_youre_the_loser.png

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:11:27 2018 No.10816749 >>10816733 My direct lineage goes back to nobility and wealthy merchants >>10816738 im upper middle class >>10816731 crawl away if your wings are damaged little bug

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 01:20:37 2018 No.10816780

>>10816749
You are the great equalizer of wealth anon, please have children just as stupid as you are who will squander all their opportunities in petty resentment and project their own shortcomings into the world and squander all the money that was built over generations so someone else who is actually capable of doing things can take your place and better the world

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 02:14:08 2018 No.10816942
File: 229 KB, 500x370, tumblr_nv6xp9Llkk1r1arpmo1_500.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10803932
I just had ANOTHER fucking dream where I'm this malignant, almost supernaturally evil serial killer. I never remember perpetrating the killings, but I'm haunted by the fact that I did them, the knowledge that people are hunting me, that it's swirling around me, and, in the end, I threw myself from a bridge and killed myself rather than let myself be caught. Instead of waking up, I felt myself die, and then, in the dream, I woke up, to the exact same scenario that had started the nightmare. In the dream, I scrambled, terrified that it was real after all, only to find out that no, it wasn't, but unable to shake that awful fear that the whole world would just suddenly twist, and I'd be living in a reality where, suddenly, inexplicably, I'd have killed before, and will kill again.

I hate these dreams. I don't want them. They're exhausting and terrible. I hate them. I hate them.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 02:49:29 2018 No.10817038 I've been thinking about what impact human evolution has on epistemology and metaphysics. Do you guys have any recs for that topic?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 07:05:29 2018 No.10817577 >>10816676 >just upset Awwww will you be okay, little fake-hard-ass faggot?

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 08:03:02 2018 No.10817698
File: 134 KB, 800x529, a.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Há três dias eu vi algo lindo que, sinto eu, não esquecerei tão cedo; talvez passe o resto da vida (ou da juventude) rememorando todas as nuances do momento, tal como sou capaz agora. Trata-se de um suado e brilhante par de pernas levemente definidas, mas gordurosas na medida correta, Pandora delirada em Baco. Não-brancas, tudo bem, porém suadas, pegajosas sob o sol implicante das três da tarde. Há três metros de distância, uma ao lado da outra, andando juntinhas safadinhas e conversando sacanagens, calorentas compartilhando tão somente um shortinho jeans minúsculo (abençoada indumentária!). A cereja do bolo: estavam calçadas, calçadinhas num chinelo imundo e delicioso, com pezinhos operários que labutavam piedosamente para suster aqueles dois pedaços de carne suados-imponentes que chamavam-me à guerra; da minha parte, apanhado de surpresa, apenas admirei e guardei na memória. Ah, a vergonha de levantar tua lança Mirmídone e endurecer teu escudo Peleio mas enfim acompanhar de fora a fuga de corcel adversário! A adolescente estava de muleta, o que me leva a considerar a veracidade do momento - não estava eu delirando sob a tarde quente, pisando em poças de gotas recém-caídas de um céu azul limpo e acolhedor? E todos aqueles carros e movimentos e pedestres gordos e velhas? Não estava: foi real. Talvez viesse de uma consulta, talvez isto signifique: machuquei os joelhinhos e o doutor precisa analisar e passar as mãos e analisar muito bem estas pernas enfadonhas que doem tanto! Assim, a companhia da velha ganha sentido - bruxa que impede investidas e sequestros e acompanha a netinha à consulta. No entanto, há também outra possibilidade, e meu pênis lateja e arde e ameaça rasgar todo seu cativeiro só de ouvi-la sendo apenas preparada assim estudada e pronta para vir residir no inquérito: e o advogado proclama: “ela talvez seja deficiente!”. Aleijadinha!, realmente, seguiam de modo engraçado. Presa ferida fugindo e procurando desesperada compaixão no caos urbano, cambaleante encara às vezes o caçador sedento e compenetrado! Pernas não-brancas porém não-negras, pardas num tom meio asiático, matronas poderosas suarentas amparadas por fortes joelhos e muleta grossa e rija comprida e chinelinhos brancos não-limpos; poderia carregá-las apenas com meu falo, e assim dirigi-las à lua, gozar constelações de esperma sobre sua pele definida e banhar ejaculações de rios naqueles pezinhos coitados e delicados-piedosos, mortos de sede ao fim do dia portanto agora agraciados com meu leitinho. De volta à terra: elas viraram numa esquina e eu segui meus destinos agora importantes e significantes pois a vida é bela, uma beleza. Eu tenho dezenove anos anos eu tenho o mundo.

sorry, it is brown-language

>>10816598

NICE

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 08:05:40 2018 No.10817710 I'm a 25 year old virgin. I am good looking with good hygiene and a normal social life.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 08:11:28 2018 No.10817721 It's likely that no one will ever care about or feel strongly for anything I've written

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 08:11:59 2018 No.10817723 I want to live somewhere tranquil, the constant traffic is insufferable. Cities are overrated.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 08:38:46 2018 No.10817779
File: 13 KB, 214x174, OhMyGod.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10803932
I am completely and unironically in love with the happy, loving relationship between characters I write.
They're so fucking adorable together, I can barely take it. Goddamn. I'm writing the moment they really fall in love for the first time and I can't stop giggling like I'm 13 again. Holy shit. cute. CUTE!

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 09:08:19 2018 No.10817854 >>10817779 cute

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 10:25:46 2018 No.10818079 Trying to write Changing first person P.O.V for my novel, And I'm having trouble setting up their own voices. Any advice?

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 10:29:39 2018 No.10818090

>>10818079
Give them unique quirks. I don't mean like, manic pixie girl quirks, I mean like, character A has crippling self esteem issues and that's why he sometimes acts aggressive over innocuous comments. Character B had a neglectful childhood and that's why they're clingy. That kind of thing. You don't have to explain this to the reader, but you have to remember it as the author.

Conflict is basic character development.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 10:33:54 2018 No.10818107
File: 8 KB, 218x231, 432324432423.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Senti a pior sensação da minha vida, agora, quando minha mãe me olhou triste e disse que eu dou trabalho pra ela justamente porque eu não faço absolutamente nada. Eu só queria um emprego.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 10:54:08 2018 No.10818180 >>10818090 >Give them unique quirks. I don't mean like, manic pixie girl quirks, I honestly tried this during my writing course in college and I was told to drop that shit because it not being realistic or Authentic.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 10:56:26 2018 No.10818190

I used to hate mysticism / any """deep""" thinking, promoted atheism, thought that science would be the salvation of humanity, etc. Now that I've been wallowing in existential dread for several years I've turned completely around and embraced everything I used to mock.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 10:57:09 2018 No.10818193

>>10818180
your teacher was a moron.
a unique conflict (internal or external) is paramount to developing a character.

what kind of quirks are we talking about here? Because I went into detail with my post. If we're talking Shyamalan levels "quirky" then yeah, that's a problem.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 11:00:41 2018 No.10818200 >>10816563 Math on it's own? You're fucked. Math + economics / programming is great though.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 11:07:05 2018 No.10818233 Has anyone tried making edits to the Wikipedia? It feels like every time I try make something nice and substantial, I get a horde of nerds coming after me with muh Wikipedi quality problems

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:10:59 2018 No.10818496

>>10818193
Character A comes from a Working-Class family, unlike his peers and friends which leaves him with crippling self-esteem issues, bitterness, and resentment. Tries to Compensates this by wearing Formal Clothing and talking Formally to the point

Character B was and still is a neglected child that made her want to be part of something bigger to give her life meaning. Believe that it is necessary for her classmates to 'like' her out of an emotional neediness to be 'normal' as all the rest

Got told to scrap this and make some Urban Fantasy Story, Ala Anita Blake or Dresden Files

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:13:25 2018 No.10818509 >>10818496 yeah, your teacher is an utter moron. those are perfectly fine. shit, I'd call it mundane, myself.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:29:41 2018 No.10818567
File: 18 KB, 800x800, nothing.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

What's the point of living when you have a micropenis (8x4cm)? I honestly don't see one.
The only time I've ever been with a woman, when I pulled off my underwear she looked up at me and just burst out laughing (It's ~2cm flaccid) and said "That's it? What a pathetic excuse for a man."
Sure, I might have gotten a pity fuck, but I will never be able to know the pleasure and filling up a woman's vagina with my penis, feeling it push against her cervix as I thrust, stretching her walls to their very limits.
>But Anon, you're more than just a dick!
Fuck off, you have no idea of what it's like to look at every single other man around you and know that he has a larger penis than you, can pleasure a woman better than you, and is intrinsically more attractive to women because of that.
The only way I will end up not killing myself within 10 years is if the medical field comes up with cybernetic penis implants or something.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:32:03 2018 No.10818577 >>10815643 >I then have to consider if it will be worth the time and effort to go through that challenge welcome to life anon

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:35:16 2018 No.10818587

>>10818567
Are you making that up? If not, porn has really fucked your brain.
Also, that happened because the woman was a vapid whore and your dick probably did you a favor there, because your brain didn't have the capability to avoid the encounter. Get a fucking grip, retard.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:36:59 2018 No.10818596 >>10818567 >But Anon, you're more than just a dick! Either didn't happen or the girl you were with is an asshole who isn't worth your time anyways.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:37:46 2018 No.10818598

>>10818509
>yeah, your teacher is an utter moron.
He is. I manage to implement those Idea to my Urban Fantasy story without him even noticing, so it wasn't that bad.

In all Honesty I kinda like it how the story turned out. Was thinking of refining it and expanding so I could get it Publish.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:37:51 2018 No.10818599 File: 60 KB, 466x500, 1385169939569.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10818587 >Get a fucking grip He can't, it's too small.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:39:31 2018 No.10818605

>>10818587
Not making it up.
What's worse is that it doesn't even work properly due to a botched circumcision at infancy, which most likely caused the stunted growth, because otherwise I am fit and healthy

>porn has really fucked your brain
Probably, but I don't watch straight porn. I can't fap when I see a dick bigger than mine (so basically all of them)

>>10818596
It happened, no doubt about it. It was my first and most likely last sexual experience.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 12:59:03 2018 No.10818674

>>10818605
>>What's worse is that it doesn't even work properly due to a botched circumcision at infancy, which most likely caused the stunted growth, because otherwise I am fit and healthy
Ahhh shit, I wish I could tell you something to help you anon. Best of luck in your future endeavors

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 13:12:35 2018 No.10818722 >>10818496 >Got told to scrap this and make some Urban Fantasy Story, Ala Anita Blake or Dresden Files Are you being For real?

>>	Help me Fri Mar 9 14:18:58 2018 No.10818964 >>10803932 Values are ultimately arbitrary. What ought to be the case cannot be deduced from what is the case. Fade me baby

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 14:20:15 2018 No.10818967
File: 15 KB, 322x322, 4226607745.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

It astounds me how many people on this board love the current economic system. Even if you support capitalism abstractly, how can you not be against the markets being dominated by a handful of multinationals, a work culture that reduces man to his employment, widespread nepotism and corruption, etc. This isn't a beautiful world where all markets are in perfect competition and all you need to succeed is to work hard. I cry for the people who have been convinced that this is the ideal, and that their exploitation is glorious and just. How can you unironically defend this?

> You, you're just a lazy neet!
I have a job and attend school, nice try.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 14:25:03 2018 No.10818988 Formidable doesn't sound like it means incredible, excellent etc. It sounds more like it means above average, and yet... It sounds too soft to mean great

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 14:46:13 2018 No.10819086

>>10818967
"Temporarily embarrassed millionaires." They've been brainwashed since birth to conflate their exploitation with the potential to be "successful," successful meaning easier access to consumer items, dad's respect, and social rank.

Also, a lot of them are just plain stupid.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 15:06:46 2018 No.10819165 >>10818988 i can only think of formidable as applicable to military/combat contexts formidable force/resistance/cocks etc

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 16:24:27 2018 No.10819466

So at my university the library is on the second floor. I'm studying my new textbook upstairs in a comfy chair beside other reading students. Suddenly we all start at what sounds like banging drums down in the lunchroom: BOOM BA DA BOOM BA DA BA DA BOOM, etc. Then I start hearing ooga boogas over the drums like some fucking war dance is being performed down in the lunchroom. I'm so incensed that I take out my phone to vent my frustrations. Copying this from my phone: 'fucking monkeys beating on drums like they still live in the jungle and not in the civilisation we have brought them -- Bingo Bango Bongo -- We don't want to leave the jungle -- oh nononono'
When I go down for class there are four bungas reclined against a glass partition resting from the drums.
I wouldn't call myself a racist and I can get on with everybody alright, but what the fuck...

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 16:29:34 2018 No.10819491 >>10817779 The romance in my books tend to be quite conflicting or even tragic.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 16:30:35 2018 No.10819498 there are 20-year olds on this board arguing about kneechu. /lit/ told me I have to start with the greeks, continue with the christians and so on and so on before getting to neechi. Should I assume most people here are just talking out of their ass?

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 16:36:27 2018 No.10819518

>>10819498
nietzsche expects people to have read those so that he can play with their ideas without explaining them. you can read nietzsche and have a lot of fun without reading all of that, but you're going to
>lolwut
some passages that do actually make sense if you know this one random anecdote attributed to the 5th Century before Christ, or remember this one weird quirk of Cathar dualism.

you can do that before 20 y/o, but most of them are talking out of their ass despite their good advice on reading first.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 16:38:41 2018 No.10819529

>>10819498
Yes, but it's not because they didn't start with the Greeks or whatever. They probably read a few quotes or like the first 3 pages and the rest of their interpretation comes from what other retards online have to say about him.

Read him yourself and you'll be able to see what I mean.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 16:44:30 2018 No.10819554 >>10819498 I thought we mostly talked about their personal flaws, not their philosophy, so you're free to join in on the discussion.

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 18:02:55 2018 No.10819842

my dick is so big that most condoms hurt, magnum etc dont make a difference because the length isnt the problem but the girth is. with gf its np since you can order various sizes off amazon but with ons it's annoying since its almost impossible to use the ones you get in the store

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 18:27:17 2018 No.10819932 >>10818967 You drank too much Kool-aid. Stop reading critical theory.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 18:28:48 2018 No.10819936 >>10819086 >le exploitation If I enjoy what I'm doing, does it really matter if I'm being "exploited" or not? Not every employer is a stereotypical evil megacorporation.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 18:30:03 2018 No.10819944 >>10819842 Sounds like you have your solution already. Stop looking for cheap sex and just have a stable relationship.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 18:34:03 2018 No.10819961 >>10819936 I don't have a problem with that and if your situation was the norm I wouldn't be as critical.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 18:38:23 2018 No.10819987 >>10819842 >>10819944 or, and this is a really crazy idea, you could, get this, you could BUY YOUR OWN FUCKING CONDOMS AND KEEP THEM ON YOU.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 18:43:52 2018 No.10820009 >>10818496 The absolute state of “”””””higher”””””” education

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 19:04:43 2018 No.10820116
File: 148 KB, 707x500, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I fucking hate my family
They treat me like shit and when I finally stop doing everything they tell me they have crocodile tears, and when I laugh in their face because I call their bullshit they have my dad hit me over the head with something. I'm not strong enough to overpower him yet and even if I do I think they'll make some fake domestic abuse case against me and get me in jail. I hate them so much I just want to move out, but I don't have enough money before I go to the school in the city which dorming is expensive as hell and my loan was already declined. Now I'm working just to go into class and eating their groceries for food. I just got hit with the bottom of a bottle because I left my sister in the hospital (I was the patient) after she was screaming in my ear hysterical about getting a fax number rather than an email and calling me retarded. I don't need to take that do I? Why do I have to be given every insult by every member of the family but when I have something to say It's 1vs4

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:21:52 2018 No.10820573
File: 492 KB, 1152x1728, DrManhattan_VARIANT[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I'm perpetually fascinated by my own self-awareness. (Or qualia, if you wish.) It's so extremely powerful. There's never been a moment since age 12 where I am hasn't been present, it's always me, the "sensation" was sprinkled regularly here and there pre-age-12, constant since. Whenever I perform a physical activity it slightly weakens; I feel this is related to my frequent insomnia and aversion to change—I want to stay, any change is a fracture in the chain of my sentience/a new piece of the chain. I only ever do anything when the impulse/need (like hunger and exhaustion) or necessity demands it, and it now becomes my "will". And my overwhelming episodic memory.
Not even going into "mental time travel", god damn.

I really like music.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:25:30 2018 No.10820581 File: 32 KB, 720x460, 125152255.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] another night down the drain

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:27:14 2018 No.10820585 >>10820116 >I'm not strong enough to overpower him yet you must be over 18 to post here

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:29:32 2018 No.10820589 >>10820585 I am But I'm a skeleton and he is strongfat Unhealthy people are common on this site, also it might be a mixture of fear too

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:43:00 2018 No.10820614 >>10808614 Thank you, I really appreciate it.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:49:13 2018 No.10820634 >>10820614 >>10805363 >>10808614 Except for the lack of EM-DASH (and that capitalized 'Told' after the semi-colon) how can you write such a long paragraph without using this—aesthetic—creation?

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:49:31 2018 No.10820636

>>10803932
communism isn't a bad thing for some people

>be leader of communist nation
>rich

>be leader of capitalist nation
>rich

>be poor in communist nation
>get beat up by cops, live in shit

>be poor in capitalist nation
>get beat up by cops, live in shit

im okay with either the worlds going to burn anyway

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 21:55:02 2018 No.10820651
File: 76 KB, 1280x720, youthot.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10820636
>be poor in capitalist country with welfare state
>state takes care of your rent, health care and other needs
>sit around reading books and drinking beer

I much prefer this to getting send to the gulag because I didn't agree with moving to the other side of the country to become a miner because the state decided they need workers there.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 22:00:13 2018 No.10820664 >>10820634 That's sleek, I'll start using it. As for the caps, that was a poor assumption; next time I'll get it right.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 22:01:29 2018 No.10820668 >>10820009 But the teacher is right.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 22:41:31 2018 No.10820763 hell ya friday night faggots time to shitpost!

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 22:58:23 2018 No.10820795 >>10820763 you know it but it's Saturday here and I don't know making people angry is getting a little old and I think I need to go out and make friends

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:00:09 2018 No.10820799 >>10811744 was a footfag before I discovered pornography, you don't even know our degeneracy level

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:06:53 2018 No.10820809 >>10806087 ikr fucking kill me already. Why did God even give me romantic attraction if He knew I wasn't going to use it? Does he laugh at my failure of a life

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:09:18 2018 No.10820814 I want to try writing a Lolita screenplay as a personal project but it'll be shit.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:10:51 2018 No.10820819 >>10820809 i just wanna sadsack post about being lonely and poor and shit, but the board is so dead, im not really in a bad mood, but its fun to complain, maybe i'll go ito /r9k/ but theres probably too many mentally ill kids

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:26:03 2018 No.10820850 >>10817779 I'd like to read it tbqh

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:32:03 2018 No.10820867
File: 1.25 MB, 960x1280, 33599597-678c-4712-8ba0-114ad1cf059d.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Responsive and direct. Responding and directing. Responding and commanding. Observing. Patient.

I see the world through my eyes. I cannot see the world through the eyes of an outsider. I must focus on what's in front of me now. Why must? Should? Want?

To be myself. Authentic. Genuine. Not happiness, but fulfillment. Satisfaction.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:35:28 2018 No.10820873 File: 483 KB, 621x579, 1509820049603.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10804632 >tfw people actually think he's a schizoid

Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:44:26 2018 No.10820906

>>10804531
>All of my ambitions have been destroyed career-wise.
Ok
>Music? Art? Since everyone wants to do it, it's low-paid and competitive.
Wow, you truly are an ambitious person since you aren't willing to compete.

>Math, philosophy, or some other academic work? Same as above. You have to be autistically devoted to your subject for your entire career and you have to deal with bureaucratic bullshit.
So you also lack the will to specialize and "bureaucratic bullshit" is present in a lot of things and can easily be side stepped.

>Programming? Computer science? Turns out the work is soul-sucking and you have to be around awkward nerds every day.
Earlier you bitched about low pay so even if it pays well it HAS to be fun? Also you'd be the most autistic of the bunch.

>At this point I think I will just settle on being a code monkey because it pays a ton of money, and I can delude myself into thinking that I could get one of those fun jobs.
Alright...

>Fuck capitalism.
No fuck you. It's funny how you only really want money yet hate capitalism like some edgy high schooler. Oops I forgot the board I was posting on

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:48:44 2018 No.10820922 >>10817779 This is the most un-cynical thing I’ve ever seen posted in this board. Anon you are adorable and pure. Do not let this place infect you.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 9 23:49:05 2018 No.10820923 >>10804531 writing code is fun you fucking faux-geek, assuming u don't work for some indian sweatshop like oracle or ibm

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 00:28:41 2018 No.10821041 >>10804531 I hate this because it looks like what I was about to write.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 00:29:46 2018 No.10821043 [DELETED]

think my dad is going to die soon so I wrote this poem

The Father

pages, in some sleepy man's will
written, and evenly recieved to an early sun's birth,
many left to stand aside, and re-examine
drab, retired words
yet to explain themselves
without him they'd recede and wince
like a wound crying to itself
they convene in a mass around his bed
to twist his arms and pull at his mouth
asking him
to denounce all inconsistencies
they see him as armature, now
to build an explicit truth
but he knows his body,
better than those words he wrote
when he was a younger man

still fiddling with it I was listening to King Krule and got inspired.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 00:31:39 2018 No.10821054 >>10803932 Hitler was too far ahead of his time and ruined everything

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 00:33:16 2018 No.10821057 >>10807366 This is how I feel about every normal joke after listening to cum town.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 00:38:35 2018 No.10821071

When people criticize you and you defend yourself, why do they always say stuff like "SEE! You're being so defensive! This how I know my criticism is correct!" I mean isn't defending yourself the natural thing to do? Wouldn't it be weirder to not defend yourself and just take shit from people, especially when you know they're not coming at you from a fully informed position?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 00:54:55 2018 No.10821124 File: 206 KB, 569x872, 1514661719236.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] When I pretend I'm a woman online it's the only time I'm truly happy. Creating scenarios, speaking of feminine issues, goals and tribulations, it brings a sense of hope.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 01:09:56 2018 No.10821185 >>10804531 You're weak. Don't let this guy's weakness and his complaining justify you. Justification will only make you weaker.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 01:11:07 2018 No.10821190

I'm literally autistic and my life is pretty horrible. My diet for the past few months has been 100% fast food, often the same meal from the same chain lunch and dinner for weeks on end. I don't understand why I behave the way I do, and I don't know how to change it. I know that every decision I'm making is a bad one, and I've even laid out in neatly organized paragraphs and bulleted lists exactly what I should be doing with my life, and what would make me happier, and I'm never able to follow through on it.

I took some LSD about a year ago, and had a pretty bad trip. My long term memory isn't that great, so I honestly can't tell if that experience put me into this funk, or if I've always been this way, but never acutely aware of it. I'm extremely unhealthy, my social skills are awful, I'm in a new town with no friends, and I have decently sized student loan debt that will probably take a few years to pay off.

I'm not depressed, just disappointed with myself.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 01:17:31 2018 No.10821212

>>10804531
>>10804531
Weakness, weakness, malady, disease, death, death of the beautiful, death of the good --- that is the mediocre. This man, this man is mediocre, weak, weak, weak, mediocre. The soft, neither too soft nor too strong hatred, the soft soft hatred against life, but not a radical hatred, no, always soft, tepid. And he posts a provocative post, and answers to most of the anons who respond to him, weak, weak, weak, because he's not that guy who posts a single provocative post as we often see and yet doesn't reply to it, he's the one who does it but doesn't have the strength to just look at the replies, because he must engage, weak, weak weak. He's not desperate yet, nor hopeful still, but mediocre, between the two, mediocre. Not desperate enough to be good in desperature, nor healthy enough for art, no passion, nothing, and his only glory will be 4chan, this thread, his life, and DAMN I need to stop coming here, I hadn't come in two years, and has the place gotten more mediocre, has its spirit gradually waned or have I grown and become better? I'm not coming back.

>fuck capitalism
this is you

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 01:21:48 2018 No.10821226 i think im just gonna go lay in bed and watch that yale literary theory class, i practically have it memorized by now, but i forgot how retarded my life is fora while

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 01:27:19 2018 No.10821242

>>10804531
The sacred flame has never burnt in your chest, and you wish to extinguish all that does burn. Die, you walking sickness, remove yourself from this world, remove your morbidity.
Although we both know you'll always be too tepid for any such thing, you eternal nothingness, the same copy of the living principle, of biological function furnished with some education and language... you are organs, walking organs, a half conscious mind, you are not conscious, you are memes, you are clichés, your consciousness could not be proved, just as that of a machine which would replicate human behavior, you are a machine, an organic machine, created to toil and work the earth, but industrialism has freed you and your peasant ancestry, and from mindlessly working the earth, you now moved to thinking yourself alive, to thinking yourself something, but you will always be that, a machine, a beast of burden, to whom mental function will always be something alien, off-putting, you wish the world was simpler, was just biological principles, digestion, food, perhaps sex on lucky days, simple pleasures. Capitalism robbed you of that, by raising you through mass education, beyond the bestial level of humanity for which you were born.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 01:30:16 2018 No.10821252 >>10821124 You're mentally ill

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 02:10:19 2018 No.10821372 I've developed a reputation as the autistic weirdo at work and really want to quit but I don't want to be an asshole and screw them over since they'll never be able to train a new guy in time for the summer rush Want to kill myself rn lads

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 02:18:36 2018 No.10821395 >>10821372 wat u do

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 02:25:22 2018 No.10821407 >>10804728 that’s not his idea you nitwit

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 02:30:29 2018 No.10821418

I’m feeling relieved. Told my father who had been pushing me really hard on succeeding in my studies that I had possibly picked the wrong one, been feeling like that for a while. Said that he would support me with whatever job I chose to do with my life as long as I could support myself and a family. I love my dad.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 02:37:04 2018 No.10821428

Anyone grow up or move to a small town? I think I’m romanticizing the idea a bit too much.
>work some small job, auto mechanic or city workmen
>spend the day working and helping people in the neighborhood
>have conversations and say hi to everyone
>at the end of the day come home and relax
>have a drink, spend time on hobbies, reading, being /out/, just enjoying the weather
>Friday night head to the bars with buddies
>weekends are just longer after work after noons, spending the day improving myself and my home
>enjoying life, feeling apart of it

Sounds so comfy, yet challenging st the same time. I’m a fairly shy person, being outgoing and talking to neighbors would be a quest for me

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 03:03:56 2018 No.10821485 >>10814090 you're gonna get arrested some day

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 03:34:53 2018 No.10821549
File: 39 KB, 1025x1571, TheExpulsionoftheTriumphantBeast.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10818190
You probably just haven't yet realised that you were addicted to narratives before, that you used narratives even about science to explain the world to yourself, that you in fact were only a conduit for information that you didn't grasp beyond an emotional attachment to scientific arguments.

You should read some Cesar Aira.

And your embrace is not much different than before, unless you cannot still defend atheism...you're probably only connected to the feeling which you get from these subjects, you're probably being embraced by an animal need for play, an unburdening of your adult/rational personae to a state of childhood awe, awe being an explosion of reason, a wonder terror delight in the possible that your mind makes possible through belief, but a belief that is irrational...you can understand this as a moment you decided to imagine what it would be like to have faith, and you do so as a child does, being taken away into the momentary joy of something without self-consciousness.

Playing out the suspension of reason in this way can be an empathetic response to the environment, a mirror-neuron response to the totality of signs...being a dark and stormy night...or, a ghost that gives a mountain a presence, always behind you in the spruce.

I'd start with the addiction to narrative explanations for the state of the world and then move on to saying, "I'm OK with not knowing how the world works, and you can't force me to learn math." Then become humble and bow your head, maybe mumble something about a disturbance you have just felt, the feeling before an occurrence that cannot be explained until what occurs occurs.
"What did you say?" They'll ask.
"I'm sure it's nothing, I just get these premonitions sometimes that I think are true in the moment and then when they actually occur I become suspicious, I don't know if to believe or not what I had felt was connected."
"You're making a constellation between memory and ego."
"I know it's bullshit. I just find it weird that I even have that feeling, you know?"
"That you're full of shit and you believe your own shit cause you like the smell, you're probably a shit eater, or a fart sniffer at the very least."
"I predict you will not enjoy those beans as much as I will."

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 03:37:07 2018 No.10821557 >>10818190 >I went from being a retard to being a retard ok

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 07:05:25 2018 No.10821925

Well it's five AM and I have been up all night. Doing something I will not mention, with people hardly worth naming. Tt's in this moment of pure quiet and empty longing where I find some deep truth that will come to me and rock my world only to vanish the next time I wake up. Smoke burning up a chimney.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 07:06:35 2018 No.10821931 >>10821428 The small town gimmick is dead. What you'll find there is domestic abuse and opioid addictions. Unless it's a college town.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 07:09:02 2018 No.10821938

>>10821190
Yeah man I've been there, except for the autistic part. You need to practice something that you really don't like doing consistently. It's the only way out. Trust me. This thing you don't like should be productive. For me, it was working out. For you it could be any number of things: going to visit old relatives, waking up early in the morning, or even just forcing yourself to go on dates.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 08:32:43 2018 No.10822091 >>10821242 It's getting hot in here

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 08:41:56 2018 No.10822118 >>10821212 >>10821242 Damn, anon

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 08:43:08 2018 No.10822124 >>10803932 I'm thinking about fasting for two weeks to be able to buy a book.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:13:50 2018 No.10822218 >>10822124 You're going to have to elaborate anon. What book are you buying that costs two weeks of food, unless you eat very ascetically?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:15:29 2018 No.10822223 >>10821428 It can work but it's going to have to be some tiny /out/ town no one's heard of. If you move to some random town in Kansas you're only in for despair.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:24:19 2018 No.10822241 >see gf one day per week >she doesn't want to cuddle, touch or do anything with me. Ffs lads.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:25:50 2018 No.10822242

Like every Sunday, the young Riemann went to Snickers (coffee shop) to read about new developments in stochastic processes, a casual pursuit of his. Having spread his papers all over the empty wooden table in a well lit corner of the ship, he couldn't help but hear that Leonie was there too. It shouldn't have been that much of a surprise, given the math department was straight around the corner, but Riemann just didn't take her for a coffee gal. She and her mater were getting louder and soon swear word fueled anxiety was governing the room. To be sure, nobody could overhear the discussion she was heaving with her mates, even when in a classroom. Today they were fighting about the right definition of a graph. As always, Leonie took the stance that you should define all object without any reference to sets. Or any notion of sets. Riemann was interested in the discussion a such, but still bothered by the fact that his sanctuary - the only place where he could hit on girls while at the same time bringing his Greeks to paper - was overtaken by the intellectual barbarians he had to endure the whole week. When he found he was starting the same page for the fourth time, he decided to stand up and go over. Five minutes after the decision he actually stood up. One minute later, he took the first step in Lenoie's direction. He was a bit puzzled what his mouth would come up with, how he'd stop these loud folks from ruining his calm but caffeinated math experience.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:28:56 2018 No.10822249 >>10805693 I've been living in South Korea for two years. Most of them are no more attractive than any other ethnicity.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:32:31 2018 No.10822259 Dogs are terrifying, their eyes are too human, too aware of their shameful existence

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:35:20 2018 No.10822269 >>10821242 This is upsetting because you've articulated very well what's been going through my mind over the past few months.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:48:42 2018 No.10822319
File: 66 KB, 666x1000, 1431979006657.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I disguise my lack of ambition and accomplishments in life with a veneer of elevated indifference, and I'm always anxious about whether people can see through this charade. I also haven't cleaned my room in years and I think about killing myself way too often. It seems to me the only way to live in this world is to make yourself numb to it, and so I try not to be consciously present too often. This works fine for the most part, until it all hits you at once the form of panic/anxiety attacks. The only thing I really enjoy anymore is sleeping because it lets me dream.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 09:55:30 2018 No.10822334 >>10822319 none of this sounds good is there anything you would like to do in life?

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:13:33 2018 No.10822388

>>10822334
I can't decide between wanting to read and understand the western canon in its entirety, or spending the rest of my life watching anime and playing vidya. I feel too fragmented to just pick a direction and go with it, and anything I find that I enjoy will soon lose its appeal to me. I find it hard to truly be subsumed by any one activity, to either be ''in the zone'' when it comes to physical/practical activities, or to feel the full effects of escapism.

For example, maybe I'd love to read x comic as a kid. Now when I do that, I'm just going through the motions in a fruitless pursuit of trying to recapture whatever positive feelings I have associated with it. My mind is always racing and thinking about other shit, and so I'm never truly enjoying what I'm doing in the moment, but instead I'm planning the life ahead of me. I tell myself that if I can do x, y, and z, then I can finally start enjoying this or that, but I consciously know that this is just a coping mechanism, and that whatever goal I've set up for myself will just morph into something else and that reaching a state of, not happiness, but a state of being generally content with life that I know I used to be in, will require something else. Something else which I'm not sure of.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:19:32 2018 No.10822412

>>10822388
So the two options you give yourself are both just consumption of different media? Are there no further ambitions you have?

Your goals and your explanations all hinge on your mind, your consciousness, feelings and associations. You also have a body. You have legs to go and see places. Are you not worried about the fact that you have developed such a grand desire to escape that all you can imagine yourself doing is sleeping (dreaming) or forgetting yourself over anime, vidya, literature etc.?

In that case, you're making yourself half a human being, and you're putting a weight on your mind that it can't shoulder. It can not give you escape from the real world. You can not investigate your ambitions, the reasons for your anxiety and charade any further.
Stop swimming in circles; go where the sea is deepest.

pick Sat Mar 10 10:21:12 2018 No.10822419

>>10822388
Take some time off in which you do nothing and try to stay in the moment. Since isolating yourself from input and coping with the resulting emptiness is harder than it sounds, try approach girls on the street and - while you're doing that - feel into yourself and the anxiety. That's a maneuver to try to get yourself into the moment and out of your head. Learn to get out of your head.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:21:54 2018 No.10822424 >>10822412 >>10822388 I might just be talking to myself here. Hope you find a nugget of truth

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:33:42 2018 No.10822459 >why did god decide to punish me the month I abstained from sin

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:38:04 2018 No.10822471

>>10822412
>Are there no further ambitions you have
Aside from being content, not really. My job is comfortable but dead-end and not very stimulating, and I'm more attracted to the idea of finding inner peace through soul searching, asceticism and all that gay shit rather than trying to impose my will on the external world.
>Are you not worried about the fact that you have developed such a grand desire to escape that all you can imagine yourself doing is sleeping (dreaming) or forgetting yourself over anime, vidya, literature etc.?
I am, but I'm not sure of what else I could do. I'm too timid to go out of my comfort zone, and I'm too autistic to do things without a clear plan and motivation, so I only do things I know I've enjoyed in the past.

Recently I've become obsessed with the idea of developing good habits, so I plan my entire week ahead of time. I know exactly what I will eat at any given time, what I will do during my commute, during lunch etc., and it's all quite organized. I imagine the very planned life of a wage slave in some life affirming indie film as described by the narrator: ''Robert woke up at exactly 6:15 like he did every morning, ate the same eggs and bacon he did every morning at 6:30. On the bus he read about the french revolution, the topic he'd set out to learn about this week. When he came home he watched an episode of his favourite british panel show while enjoying his rice and steamed vegetables with fried pork before doing the dishes. After doing some light exercise and planning for tomorrow, it was lights out at exactly 22:15.'' The difference being I'm not hoping for some mpdg to teach me how to be spontaneous and enjoy the whimsy and wonder that life has to offer, but rather I have a hope that if I can force myself to live by a plan, and that life will go on without any hiccups or major episodes. I'll learn to enjoy it, and once I'm over the threshold, I'll have achieved some sort of equilibrium where I can enjoy the small things in life without any risk or adventure.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:53:31 2018 No.10822518 >>10822241 She's not your gf. Somebody's fucking her, I guarantee it. What are you even doing?

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:55:46 2018 No.10822521
File: 197 KB, 750x1000, raf,750x1000,075,t,101010 01c5ca27c6.u1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10822471
Routine sounds like a good start.

Planning what to eat sounds a bit much and you'll drop that eventually, but planning to eat at a certain time - instead of dropping eating at that moment - will help.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 10:59:16 2018 No.10822530

>>10822388
If understanding the western canon in its entirety or wasting your life away on video games is something you're genuinely torn between, then I feel the former was never really meant for you. I don't mean this in any negative way, because it's something I went through as well.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:02:00 2018 No.10822538 >>10820923 You've never had a programming job before. It's not all fun and games.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:03:24 2018 No.10822541 >>10821212 >I'm not coming back. See you soon, anon.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:11:54 2018 No.10822569 >>10822388 This is literally fixed with goals and growing up. If you're constantly changing focus, just set a time limit on yourself

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:13:31 2018 No.10822574

>>10822471
>I'm more attracted to the idea of finding inner peace through soul searching, asceticism and all that gay shit
>The difference being I'm not hoping for some mpdg to teach me how to be spontaneous and enjoy the whimsy and wonder that life has to offer, but rather I have a hope that if I can force myself to live by a plan, and that life will go on without any hiccups or major episodes. I'll learn to enjoy it, and once I'm over the threshold, I'll have achieved some sort of equilibrium where I can enjoy the small things in life without any risk or adventure.

No wonder you're depressed. It seems like you're setting yourself up for an incredibly boring, uneventful life.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:17:06 2018 No.10822587 >>10822241 Literally what is an intimate relationship to you

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:18:13 2018 No.10822589 >>10822259 A dogs eyes are dull, void of any meaning or purpose. They exist to serve the master

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:19:02 2018 No.10822592

>>10822223
>some tiny /out/ town that no one has heard of
That would be the goal idea of where to live, >>10821931 and I know no place will be perfect. I just want a place where people seem to take life day by day and everything isn’t about tomorrow or next week.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:20:44 2018 No.10822598 >>10820923 It’s not that fun

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:20:55 2018 No.10822599 >>10822574 Most people lead uneventful lives. I'm just not trying to get my hopes up more than I have to. To find joy in the mundane.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:21:28 2018 No.10822601

>>10820906
>Wow, you truly are an ambitious person since you aren't willing to compete.
I'm not willing to compete just to end up eating ramen every day. Even if I were extremely good, there's a 99.999% chance that would be my fate. That's retarded.

>So you also lack the will to specialize
Is that supposed to be a virtue?

>Earlier you bitched about low pay so even if it pays well it HAS to be fun?
Yes. And I don't care about "low pay" so much as I care about being paid enough to survive.

>you only really want money
No, I just want to survive and be content. In the current system, money is how I get those things, so I "want" money insofar as I want those other things.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:27:49 2018 No.10822626

>>10822592
You would feel disconnected and trapped. It was nice when I was a kid because I didn't have any responsibilities. When I got older, all I wanted to do was escape so I could pursue my dreams. Theres nothing for you there, unless you like solitude and depression

>don't fall for the "self-improvement" NEET meme

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:47:13 2018 No.10822663

>>10804848
The $100 order will probably be finished either today or tomorrow. The guy I wrote that $40 short story for loved it and says he'll commission me again sometime and will also give me a 5-star review. I've also been approached by 3 more potential buyers. I'm experimenting as well on something I won't go into here but I think if I work at it long enough, and it won't be difficult to work at, then it could very well potentially yield promising results. The month is only a third over but I've pretty much already earned $155 from my writings. I'm highly doubtful that the next 3 weeks will yield nothing, but even if it does, this month has already been hugely successful and it's not even half finished.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:47:24 2018 No.10822666 >>10822601 see >>10821212 >>10821242

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 11:50:59 2018 No.10822674 >>10822626 >>don't fall for the "self-improvement" NEET meme What is this?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 12:05:22 2018 No.10822718 FUCK quitting porn is hard.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 12:24:31 2018 No.10822772

>>10822674
Self-improvement takes hard work and dedication, its not just reading for an hour a day. Its something like learning a language, learning an instrument, keeping a strict workout schedule. You have a goal in mind that you stick to, and do not stop until you complete it. Completing your goal means you come out a different person, you have a new ability or understanding of something that makes you more useful to the world and to yourself. The meme is that NEETS always talk about self-improvement, but spend their time on the internet and consumables

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 12:25:29 2018 No.10822775 >>10822718 It is hard, isn't it? Especially in the mornings.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 14:04:46 2018 No.10823116 >>10822587 Not this

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 14:55:54 2018 No.10823329

>>10822772
A big part of self-improvement is to have the willingness to let parts of ourselves die so that we can replace it with something better. Seek truth, and speak nothing BUT truth. Don't lie. So, what do you want to improve? If you happen to be a NEET and you don't want to be anymore then you need at least one of three things; education, employment, or training. For professional education you need money, and for professional training you need money, so do you have money? If not, you need employment. Do you have any job experience? If not, then you're going to want basically whatever is available. Get out there and get a job at a fast-food joint. Chances are you'll find it to be one of two things; either it'll suck, or if you end up with good co-workers and a good manager then you might actually enjoy it while you're learning all the responsibilities and making money but in time you'll likely find it boring and monotonous unless you happen to be someone who just doesn't need things to be different. Perhaps you're perfectly fine with things staying the same as long as you keep getting paid, and if you do a good job for a few months then you can request a promotion.

If you're refused, then your employer is perfectly fine to replace you with someone new should you decide to leave. That means you haven't done a good enough job or the restaurant owner is SO tight on funds that they simply cannot afford to pay you more. If it's the first reason, work harder and prove that it's in their best interest to keep you instead of to get someone new and to train them. If it's the second reason, well you should be looking for another job anyways because that job likely isn't going to be there for much longer, and even if it is, you won't be gaining anything by sticking around so stay on good terms with your manager, make sure they'll be a good reference when you're done, and with several months or over a year on your resume with the same employer then other potential employers will see that favourably.

So figure out what your goal is and go for it. Improve your life one step at a time. In North America we've all got something like a 40% chance of being in the top 10% richest people for at least one year of our lives, and we've all got something like a 10% chance of being in the top 1% for at least one year of our lives. I'm working hard for my shot at a comfortable life. I don't need to get even CLOSE to 10% to be comfortable, but with my work ethic and determination I'd be surprised if I never make it to that 10% mark, which is probably merely reaching 6-figures a year. $8500 a month or so. There are people self-publishing books who make more than that. Not many, but there are some.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 15:56:42 2018 No.10823589

>>10823329
>few months
Ha! Three months minimum just for the employer to see if they want to keep you around, then a year to prove loyalty and aptitude, not to mention learning how to communicate the internal politics from a side that will accept you moving into a higher position. Regardless of your aptitude, loyalty, attitude to internal politics are the keys to moving up in ranks in these types of jobs and that isn't done in a few months but is proven over long periods of time. Sorry.

Anonymous Sat Mar 10 16:16:11 2018 No.10823670

>>10823589
Pardon, when I said 'promotion' I meant 'raise', which can very much be something you can earn in less than a year. I try to be careful in how I articulate myself to be as factual and clear as possible, but it looks like I've faltered in this instance.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 10 17:27:22 2018 No.10823948 >>10823947 >>10823947 >>10823947

Advanced search
Text to find
Subject [?]Search by post subject. Leave empty for any.
Username [?]Search for user name. Leave empty for any user name.
Tripcode [?]Search for tripcode. Leave empty for any.
Email [?]Search by email. Leave empty for any.
Filename [?]Search by image filename. Leave empty for any.
From Date [?]Enter what date to start searching from. Format is YYYY-MM-DD
To Date [?]Enter what date to start searching until. Format is YYYY-MM-DD
Image hash
Search in	All Posts OPs Only
Deleted posts	Show all posts Show only deleted posts Only show non-deleted posts
Internal posts	Show all posts Show only internal posts Show only archived posts
Order	New posts first Old posts first
Capcode	All Posts Only by Users Only by Mods Only by Admins Only by Developers
Results	Posts Threads
Action	[ Simple ]

/lit/ - Literature