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/lit/ - Literature

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10461172 No.10461172 [Reply] [Original]

>Sits down next to you at a bar
>Orders a whiskey
>Drags his fingerless glove wearing hand through his hair
>Recives whiskey
>"Thanks bucko"
>Uses an old worn copy of "Story of the Eye" as an coaster
>Stares blankly off into the distance
>Takes a sip of whiskey and looks at you
>"Did you know that sex and death are the only two things worth writing about?"
What would you do?

>> No.10461198

only brainlets obsess with sex

>> No.10461203

>>10461172
>an coaster

>> No.10461206

ive read too many books that had sex in it

>> No.10461241

>>10461172
"Please don't speak to me."

>> No.10461315

I'd tell him to stfu and proceed to watch his channel on my phone

>> No.10461325

Cliff is kinda cringy and cute. I would hold his hand.

>> No.10461398

Squidward lookin ass

>> No.10461429
File: 422 KB, 2048x1536, 68699625-F9CA-4048-B48E-C305593A34E5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461429

>stays home, leaving you alone at the bar

>> No.10461447
File: 79 KB, 997x300, Pynch Bar.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461447

>>10461172
I'm just gonna start posting these so we don't have to do this again

>> No.10461451
File: 58 KB, 871x238, DFW bar.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461451

>>10461172

>> No.10461457
File: 12 KB, 480x360, hqdefault (2).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461457

*reaches into pocket*
*throws sand at his face*
"pocket sand"

>> No.10461461
File: 42 KB, 1157x239, vonnegut bar.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461461

>>10461172
vonnegut

>> No.10461472
File: 25 KB, 614x231, Bruno Bar.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461472

>>10461172
Bruno

>> No.10461482
File: 47 KB, 1199x195, shakespeare bar.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461482

>>10461172
ye olde fhakefeare

>> No.10461491
File: 41 KB, 888x199, McCarthy Bar.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10461491

>>10461172
Cormac was a gem

>> No.10461533

>>10461172
>>10461447
>>10461451
>>10461461
>>10461472
>>10461482
>>10461491
Did Cliff start this meme so he would be unconsciously associated with the greats of /lit/?

>> No.10461539

>>10461172
"Uh...I dunno. What do you mean?"

>> No.10461636

(narrow eyes) (blush) (look away) I mean. You’re wrong but that’s alright. (swing feet under the bar)

>> No.10462219

>>10461491

>using punctuation

You had one job

>> No.10462319
File: 401 KB, 1536x2174, oscar-wilde.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10462319

>Sits down next to you at a salon
>Orders absinthe
>Places his staff against the counter and begins a tasteful application of Malmaison perfume to his person
>Recives his absinthe
>"Work is the curse of the drinking classes."
>Uses an old worn copy of "À rebours" as an coaster
>Glances at a passing rentboy
>Takes a sip of your champagne and looks at you seductively
>"Did you know that beauty and pleasure are the only two things worth writing about?"

>> No.10463414
File: 39 KB, 423x520, 1503253052230.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10463414

>>10461172
>Sits down next to you at fashionable Shanghai bar
>Orders some instant noodles
>fumbles with phone, posts several times on twitter
>noodles arrive, uses Capitalism and Schizophrenia as a coaster
>looks at you
>"heh..... the story goes like this, kiddo"
What do you do?

>> No.10463444

>>10461172
>people pay this guy to read their shit

>> No.10463448

>>10461172
Who is this man?

>> No.10463509

>>10461172
>Why?

>> No.10463843

>>10461398
laughed too hard. Thank you.

>> No.10464455
File: 23 KB, 300x447, mfw reading this shit lovecraft.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10464455

Someone please do a Lovecraft version.

>> No.10464659
File: 334 KB, 1161x869, cliff.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10464659

>>10461172
Stills from his next review leaked

>> No.10464673

>>10464455
>Lovecraft
>ever going to a bar
Are we talking about the same H. Poor Lonercraft? Maybe he could send a letter to the bar's address.

>> No.10464732

>>10464673
Write that letter.

>> No.10464784
File: 26 KB, 600x668, nietzsche.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10464784

>Sits down next to you at a bar
>Orders a fruit
>Drags his fingerless glove wearing hand through his walrus moustache
>"Thanks last man"
>Uses an old worn copy of "Parsifal" as a coaster
>goes off on a tangent how he is of Polish nobility
>Takes a bite out of the fruit and looks at you
>"Did you know that the overman and nihilism are the only two things worth writing about?"
What would you do?

>> No.10465356

>>10461172

support his patreon so I can enter into a lottery to win his shitty coffee?

>> No.10465452
File: 48 KB, 480x600, thebigD.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10465452

>sits down next to you at the inn
>asks the waiter to begin heating up the samovar and bring some cognac as well
>has epileptic seizure
>receives tea and cognac
>"bless you, peбeнoк" *signs the cross over the waiter*
>uses an old worn copy of "Dead Souls" as an coaster
>throws himself weeping at the feet of the woman beside you, kissing them frantically and mumbling about how Pushkin would surely have praised exactly just such beauties as these and how he and you and she are all guilty of everything before everyone
>sets the cognac aside and looks at you
>"Did you know that redeeming prostitutes and atheist-strawmen are the only two things worth writing about?"
What would you do?