/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.10130664]

How can one country be so completely devoid of literary talent?

[Anonymous No.10130675]

>>10130664
Maple syrup-induced diabetes

[Anonymous No.10130696]

>a frozen waste sparsely populated by addiction-prone natives, philistine bourgeois francophones, nouveau-riche chinks and slightly more liberal pasty mid-western dullards
The country is a collection of some of the most boring and pointless people on earth in a place where nothing notable ever happens. What do you expect?

[Anonymous No.10130719]

>>10130664
this is why we need immigration! Stupid Anglo Canadians cant write for shit. and no one in their right mind would read books written in Quebec french

[Anonymous No.10130724]

>>10130664
all of their cultural output is just a shittier version of the US's. Look at their television shows, they are all absolute garbage

[Anonymous No.10130725]

>>10130664
>Northrop Frye
>Mordechai Richler
>Alice Munro
>Anne Carson
>Robertson Davies
>Margaret Atwood
>Leonard Cohen

Try again sweety

[Anonymous No.10130726]

>>10130725
But all those people you listed are talentless hacks?

[Anonymous No.10130756]

>>10130725
>this list of mediocrities and literal whos
It's like when Brits try to defend their cuisine. Some of the dishes may even be tasty, but no sane country would call fish in batter or sausages with mash a delicacy or great culinary achievement.

[Anonymous No.10130761]

>>10130724
>he hasn't watched the trailer park boys or the x files

[Anonymous No.10130801]

>>10130726
They're not??

[Anonymous No.10130803]

>>10130756
>I don't know them therefore they are bad :P

kys

[Anonymous No.10130822]

>>10130803
Haven't read just two out of that list and judging by the others it's completely justified to preemptively call them mediocre. Accept the reality, stop being mad and have some of those diarrhea fries you call a national dish.

[Anonymous No.10130828]

>>10130822
>diarrhea fries you call a national dish.
fucking kek. canada btfo

[Anonymous No.10130845]

>>10130725
Northrop Frye was a fucking magnificent human being you slack-jawed cunt. Everyone else is trash though.

[Anonymous No.10130852]

>>10130724
>he hasn't watched little mosque on the prairie

[Anonymous No.10130859]

>>10130725
>not including stephen leacock

[Anonymous No.10130894]

>>10130664
Uhm no try again sweaty xx

[Anonymous No.10131011]

>>10130664
*blocks your path*

[Anonymous No.10131024]

>>10130664
are you kidding me?

[Anonymous No.10131110]

>Justin Bieber
>Nickelback
>Celine Dion
>>Bryan Adams
>Shania Twain
>Michael Bublé

We're too busy exporting our shittiest music to the retards down south, who eat it up and make the "artists" fabulously rich.

[Anonymous No.10131142]

You're wrong, is why. Go eat your fucking cheeseburgers.
>>10130756
*nglo food is still better than am*rican food.
>delicacy
>great culinary achievement
Nice buzzwords, bourgeoisie twat.
>>10130822
Only fr*gs consider diarrhea fries a national dish. In the West its more about wildberry pies, cereals, and meat dishes.

[Anonymous No.10131173]

I don't know how people here can shit on Robertson Davies considering how much he resembles well loved authors here.

[Anonymous No.10131189]

[Anonymous No.10131201]

Norm MacDonald

[Anonymous No.10131239]

>>10130664
I'm from Northeast Ohio which is literally the same thing as Canada. All we have is Sherwood and Bill Waterson

[Anonymous No.10131335]

>>10131239
By that logic Canada can lay claim to Neil Armstrong

>We went to the moon eh n shitz

[Anonymous No.10131336]

>>10130726
>Northrop Frye
>talentless hack
God, why is /lit/ so fucking bad

[Anonymous No.10131362]

>>10131142
I'm not American, my buttblasted friend. But things like Cajun, Texmex and New England cuisine are all objectively infinitely more interesting than "things in batter", "things with gravy" and "things with mash on the side" that is literally 99% of British grub.
>pies
>cereals
>national dish
Toppest of my keks to you. Face it - Canada is cultural dump in literally every way possible. Few decent musicians and couple of buildings built by Europeans hundreds of years ago is all that your frozen shithole can offer to the world.

[Anonymous No.10131375]

>>10131336
>academic literary criticism
>great literature
God, why are canucks so fucking pathetic

[Anonymous No.10131495]

Canadian here.

>>10130719
The Canadian lit scene is chalk full of immigrant """"literature"""" rehashing the same narrative of oppression, struggle, freedom and the search for a new identity. This has become the accepted norm and anything challenging this farce is deemed unmarketable and blasphemous.

>>10130725
>Mordecai Richler
Tried Barney's Version and promptly dropped it out of boredom.
>Cohen
Forced his circumsized cock into the music industry because he couldn't bare the idea of writing poetry and not getting paid for it. Depressed for 50 years and then one day SUDDENLY CURED.
>Margaret Atwood
Unbearable prose, bearable poetry, by no means exceptional and yet she is lauded as Canada's best piece of literary talent.

[Anonymous No.10131528]

Pynchon is secretly Canadian

[Anonymous No.10131549]

>>10131528
Yes, but Canadians are secretly Americans.

[Anonymous No.10131557]

>>10131549
And Americans are secretly British

[Anonymous No.10131563]

>>10131011
my boy

[Anonymous No.10131567]

>>10131557
The British are fairly unsecretly Arabs, though.

[Anonymous No.10131583]

>>10131567
>not german

[Anonymous No.10131737]

>>10131557
This is true.

Canadians like to go off as being culturally closer to Britain but having lived in all three countries I can tell you that the Us is much more similar. Canadians are somewhere between Australians and Kiwis.

[Anonymous No.10131754]

>>10131583
Britain is an Arabo-Indo-Polish nation with a French motto ruled by German nobility and owned by Chinese megacorps. It is known.

[Anonymous No.10131758]

>>10131737
>somewhere between Australians and Kiwis
Do Canadians really look like this?

[Anonymous No.10131760]

>>10130696
needs more gulags

[Anonymous No.10131764]

Just fucking nuke us already

[Anonymous No.10131765]

Being boring is just part of the Canadian identity.

They’re an entire country of observers, not do-ers.

In short, Americans kick ass, while, in opposition, Canadians KISS ass.

No one takes them seriously, therefore nobody wants to read their shit.

[Anonymous No.10131767]

>>10131737
Canadians, Australians and Kiwis are all similar in the sense that they are almost entirely irrelevant on the world stage

[Anonymous No.10131788]

How long till Neal Peart gets the nobel?

[Anonymous No.10131797]

Canada is basically normie nation.

Immigrants come here instead of USA because they either think they're the same, think Canada is easier to do, or notice others heading there and having better lives.

There is actually nothing interesting here. The women are all bland as fuck and hate immigrant women for stealing the show. The men are lazy as shit and can't be bothered to work half as hard as immigrant men. The kids are ignorant shits so caught up in trying to outdo each other in popularity/coolness metrics they don't notice how great they actually have it.

The wealthy upper class think they're middle class, the middle clasa think they're lower class, the lower class think they're completely impoverished, and most of the people living on the streets are veterans or too lazy/unmotivated to do anything more than mindless self indulgence.

Seriously, the only "new" entertainment Canada has actually come up with that remotely rivals USA is Jordan Peterson & Lauren Southern fucking with libtards/sjw's and getting paid for it.

>Canada came up with sports like hockey and basketball, but the US generally does both better.
>AND TO FUCKING KICK IT ALL DOWN FURTHER, THE NATIONAL SPORT IS FUCKING LACROSSE.

[Anonymous No.10131804]

>>10131754
>owned by Chinese megacorps

[Anonymous No.10131814]

>>10131797
Canada is, like, two years old. Just give it a minute, anon.

[Anonymous No.10131824]

>>10131797

>Canada came up with sports like hockey and basketball, but the US generally does both better.

Most of the players on "American" hockey teams are Canadian.

[Anonymous No.10131859]

>>10131797
This kills the Canadian.

[Anonymous No.10131919]

I've travelled all over the world, and everywhere I've been has something to offer, apart from Canada.
It is some shit boring wasteland, and it's populated by weed-smoking zombies.

[Anonymous No.10131941]

Where do these ideas come from? What website tells you that you have to hate Alice Munro? Is this shot written in code in deuteronomy or something?

[Anonymous No.10131945]

>>10131919
This. Canada is very boring. No one should come here. Stay out.

[Anonymous No.10131998]

You all are PLEBS

[Anonymous No.10132004]

>>10131362
>But things like Cajun, Texmex and New England cuisine are all objectively infinitely more interesting
Entirely wrong. 'mammy's minced possum gator succorolebalaya' isn't 'interesting' food. You're just too French to see that.
>more incorrect shitposting
Child, you are a burger -- get over it

Pies and cereals aren't a national dish, Canada isn't nationalized. Canada is provincialized. The unofficial dish of Alberta is probably a Saskatoon berry pie. Versus burgerfat, where the official dish of the North is the mighty cheeseburger, and the official of the South, the grand deep-fried double-triple bacon triple-decker lard sextuple patty ass-handle freedom burger

[Anonymous No.10132398]

>>10130664
It's about half the size of England in terms of population. It was even sparser during the formative years. Most great literature comes from Western countries with a long history of existence. The same can be said for Australia. Both Canada and Australia are relatively new nations.

American culture is actually fairly old given that we are born out of the Protestant Reformation whereas Canadians are more of a Victorian creation. In fact, the same can be said about Australians, that they're made from the same Victorian mold as Canadians. So we have about a 200-year headstart over Canadians and Australians.

[Anonymous No.10132610]

>>10131814
>2yo
>recently celebrated its 150th
Should be much further along than most countries, given its expanse of land, constant immigration, relatively stable (albeit dependent upon the US) economy, and immense natural resources.

>>10131824
And neither sport would be internationally renowned or cared about if it weren't for the American economy boosting their presence. The same is said for nearly every channel and program/show in Canadian media -- it's either directly outsourced to what's good in the US or at best a paltry imitation. OC does not yet exist in Canaderp.

>>10131859
I'd apologize, but I'm not willing to be so Canadian on an anonymoose cereal profitization board.

>>10131919
>>10131945
Agreed. Hell, crime is boring. Even the serial killers are so economically productive/successful they're bored and resort to killing and feeding whores to livestock.

>>10130664
Reader's Digest and the Journey Prize Anthology are the closest to legitimate greatness in the country. And shitposting on foreign weeb pr0n dumping forums. Perhaps the greatest value Canada brought the rest of the world, besides natural resources, is Ellen Page, from Halifax, NS -- and look how she turned out in the end.

>>10130761
Trailer Park Boys < 8 Mile; admittedly one is a series while the other is a movie. I'm sure there's more white trash series that existed in the US prior to TPB.

X Files' creator/writer and director were American. It aired simultaneously in USA & Canada for its pilot.

[Anonymous No.10132619]

>>10130664
cuz they meke da good music

[Anonymous No.10132717]

[Anonymous No.10132809]

>>10130724
Wrong.

[Anonymous No.10133209]

>>10132610
>8 Mile is good
It's wiggershit. TPB is the peak of hysterical realism in television or film. It's not just white trash, it's perfectly executed.

People, especially the poor, like wiggershit like 8 Mile because it's fantastical. A similar yet far more honest audience likes TPB because beyond some stylistic hyperbole (Lahey couldn't possibly drink as much as he does, for example), which in fact does not take from the realism, but rather defines the realism by its absolute boundaries: a ridiculous hyperalcoholic with no sexual boundraries somehow became not only the supervisor of a trailer park, but was a police officer.
It also has absolutely incredible dialogue.
It's a Confederacy of Dunces but better, and successfully made into a long-standing television and film series.

[Anonymous No.10133228]

>>10132004
>ur wrong
>straw men
Just stop, you're already dead. Go back to eating donuts with gravy and bread toast.

[Anonymous No.10133241]

>>10133228
I do none of that.

[Anonymous No.10133254]

>>10131797
>The kids are ignorant shits so caught up in trying to outdo each other in popularity/coolness metrics

lol, this is the essence of you and /lit/ tho

[Anonymous No.10133267]

>>10130852
good shit

[Anonymous No.10133270]

Because Canadas literary tradition is literally run by middle-class white women and/or jews.

[Anonymous No.10133365]

>>10131011
ayyy

[Anonymous No.10133416]

>>10131797
Half of that you pulled of your ass and the other half could apply to basically any Western nation.

Sometimes I legitimately can't tell if this is a troll designed to make me mad or if this board is as retarded as it seems.

[Anonymous No.10133482]

>>10130724
Dont talk shit about trailer park boys and Canada's worse driver.

[Anonymous No.10133498]

>>10133416
>implying
Canadia is still a cultural wasteland compared to both most countries on Earth countries.

[Anonymous No.10133519]

>>10131760

This, and about a thousand years of existential pain before anyone started exploring what that meant. An obsession with interpersonal interaction can't hurt.


Also, low population, low density. California has more people.

[Anonymous No.10133568]

>>10130664
Alistair MacLeod is a Scottish Canadian short story writer and novelist from Cape Breton in Novia Scotia, who I consider one of the best short fiction authors ever.

His story, "In The Fall" is particularly good. It's about a coal mining father who is pressured by his shrew wife to sell his old retired work horse to a man who will turn him into mink feed. Written from the perspective of his son.

[Anonymous No.10134041]

>>10131797
>the middle clasa think they're lower class, the lower class think they're completely impoverished

Really? Cause I see the opposite in Toronto and Southern Ontario. Lower classes acting as if they are Rockefellers.

[Anonymous No.10134411]

>>10134041
I think it's the opposite as well. Then again there is no real wealth in Canada like you see in the US. Very bland nation overall

[Anonymous No.10134605]

>>10134411
>wealth is exciting
Soyboy spotted

[Anonymous No.10134626]

>>10134605
Wealth is opportunities, opportunities are future actions, actions shape the world. Now say something about enlightened anti-materialism and go be poor somewhere else.

[Anonymous No.10134645]

>>10134626
>soyboy is this delusional
I have more money than you btw
Nobody thinks your cool because your man-heels cost you $8500

[Anonymous No.10134656]

>>10134626
Opportunities =/= future actions

[Anonymous No.10134661]

>>10134645
>being wealthy implies pointless spending
It's not even a straw man, just pure irrational asspain. Again, go be poor somewhere else.

[Anonymous No.10134662]

>>10134411
You are talking out your ass. US buys 40% of their oil from Canada. Where do you think that goes?

[Anonymous No.10134675]

>>10134662
Laundered and set to Cayman accounts. Not that any sane wealthy person would actually stay and live in Canadia.

[Anonymous No.10134702]

>>10134662
To the American companies that do oil extraction in alberta. Canadians just work the rig-pig jobs that pay decent, but those CEOs and Execs are all Americans. The true wealth goes to the states

[Anonymous No.10134713]

>>10130664
It's not even just literary talent, it's talent in general. Not a single Canadian has ever been great at anything.

[Anonymous No.10134754]

>>10134713
Will Shatner ( captain Kirk) was the best starfleet commander. Chris hadfield was the best real life space commander.
Canada produced the best comedians (john candy, Jim Carrey, norm MacDonald, Dan aykroyd, Tom green, Seth Rogan, Tommy chong, Jon dore, etc.)
Pamela Anderson had the greatest boobs at one point.
Wayne gretzky is still the greatest hockey player ever.

[Anonymous No.10134761]

>>10134754
It's impressive how literally every single one of these is wrong.

[Anonymous No.10134804]

>>10134754
yeah, and they all had to leave canada and go to the US to have their career. Canada kept them from being great.

[Anonymous No.10134806]

>>10131024
lol no

[Anonymous No.10134834]

>>10134754
Sisko is the best captain get some taste

[Anonymous No.10134846]

>>10134713
>Blade Runner 2049 was directed by a Quebecer and starred a guy from Ontario

[Anonymous No.10134863]

>>10134846
Yeah but that movie sucked

[Anonymous No.10134865]

>>10134863

[Anonymous No.10135433]

>>10130859
>leacock
This. Fucking pseuds in this thread.

[Anonymous No.10135494]

>>10135433
Ever been to Mariposa? Seems comfy

[Anonymous No.10135524]

>>10134713
What about Cuphead?

[Anonymous No.10135545]

>>10130725
add Norm Macdonald to that list buddy

[Anonymous No.10135630]

>>10131375
>there is only great literature and talentless hacks

[Anonymous No.10135648]

>>10130664
I like ross king books

[Anonymous No.10135685]

>>10132610

>And neither sport would be internationally renowned or cared about if it weren't for the American economy boosting their presence

Nobody in Canada gives a shit whether Americans (or anyone else) watch hockey or not.

[Anonymous No.10135733]

>>10134661
Again kiddo I have way more money than you

[Anonymous No.10135751]

>>10135733
Prove it, give a substantial amount to whoever posts their paypal first.

[Anonymous No.10136257]

>>10135751
Why would I do that?

[Anonymous No.10136379]

>>10132004
>Canada is provincialized.
It's a confederation dipshit. We're confederates, and we're a fuck ton weighed down by Nationalism. And the PM role has barely any checks during a majority. So the national dish is shit. Always centralised shit, manufactured in Ontario and Quebec with the help of government subsidies. We love it, too. But don't go out of our way to praise shit, except when it's steamy on a cold day.

[Anonymous No.10136466]

Surely all British posters on this forum know "In Flanders Field" by John McCrae, a Canadian. Canadian war poets were just as good as the British ones I know you all read for your GCSE's. Surely you'd prefer reading Anglo and Scot Canadian poets over Yiddish Britons such as Rosenberg and Sassoon.

t. American descendant of a Canadian war poet

[Anonymous No.10136965]

>>10136466
No, *nglos are incapable of thought beyond appeal to authority. Neither can am*ricans because they are, like *nglos, still colonized. Only Canada has overcome all Empires.

[Anonymous No.10136987]

>>10131764
who is this semen demon

[Anonymous No.10137010]

>>10135733
this is pathetic, leave Canada, you're dragging us down

[Anonymous No.10137023]

>>10130724
You've clearly never watched Kenny vs. Spenny

[Anonymous No.10137036]

>he hasn't read Two Solitudes

Sure smells plebby in here.

[Anonymous No.10137047]

>>10136965
>single world superpower is colonized
>frozen shithole with Queen on their money isn't
TOP ZOZ

[Anonymous No.10137053]

>>10137047
>superpower
This delusional mindset is exactly what makes you colonized.

[Anonymous No.10137374]

>>10135433
What's that one story about a boat full of Canadians sinking in 10 feet of water? An honest testament to the embarrassment of Canadian mediocrity.

>>10134702
Not before we tax the fuck out of them

[Anonymous No.10137385]

>>10131011
this nigga canadian no shit

[Anonymous No.10137394]

Didn't realize there was already a Canada hate thread. Please refer to >>10137267