/wg/ Writing General

[Anonymous No.23495576]

"There's a Storm Coming" edition

Previous: >>23486690

/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ
RESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvC

Please limit excerpts to one post.
Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.
Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.
If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.
Violent shills, relentless shill-spammers, and grounds keeping prose, should be ignored and reported.

Simple guides on writing:
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHdzv1NfZRM
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whPnobbck9s
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAKcbvioxFk

Thread theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3waIDOBwb8g

[Anonymous No.23495661]

I WILL HAVE ACCURATE PHYSICS IN MY STORY.
I WILL.

[Anonymous No.23495686]

>>23495661
Is there any fluid flow in your story?

[Anonymous No.23495709]

I am trying to write a story where the psyche of the main character is important. There are parts that are real and clear, but I want there to be some parts where reality is muddled by my character's mind. Like the main character is entering a dream state. After he leaves he is unsure if it happened, and so should the reader. I also want to make the writing in this dream state to be more strange, exaggerated, a clear departure of reality, but there is still the feeling of it perhaps being real.

I am a little concerned that the change from real and dreamlike mental states might be a bit jarring, and annoying for the reader. I also am concerned as I need to both have the dream world feel somewhat unreal while keeping it comprehendible and not too hard to read.

Do anyone have any advice on these concerns? How do I keep the swap from being jarring and how do I make the writing dreamlike while being easy to read? I want to note in one situations where it switches, the character is entering his home, and another one he is inebriated.

[Anonymous No.23495810]

>finish story
>it is good
>get idea for how to expand it by bringing back a one-off character and making her a love interest
>have no experience in relationships and have no idea how to write one convincingly

Guess I'll just stop while I'm ahead. Or maybe in 20 years if I get a single date I can use the info for the sequel.

[Anonymous No.23495847]

"kek...! kek...!!!" the crone laughed, covering her eyes with her veiny hands, "you will give me your body, Jonas!" she cried.

"I won't, you old bitch!" I responded with trembling legs. I grabbed my gun in haste, knowing fully it wasn't charged but hoping I could maybe crush her head with it. As I tried to open the exit door down the corridor, it shut on its own : Blimey's severed leg was pushing against it. I kicked it out of the way before I could realize what it really was and ran as fast as I could.

Eating ground and nearly stumbling in the campus' hallways, I could infer that I would be out of the campus in around ten minutes. It wasn't fast enough. there was no way I could run that long, I realized, as I could still hear the crone cries and giggles behind me. hearing her voice in the dead of the night gave me chills. I was terrified, my eyes wide open and taking in everything around me as I ran, hoping for some place to hide. My heart was pumping with adrenaline, my legs were weak, my bladder was about to explode. it felt like an eternity.

I passed through the central garden, kicking grass and flowers. I heard the sounds of boars around me and prayed they wouldn't freak out seeing a grown man running. After some time, I reached the main hall, nearly crashing into the cracked sliding doors in haste. I opted to head into some of the student's council room, as I knew Paul never took time to lock it before going home. I closed the door, dived onto the ground and hid myself behind the filing cabinets. In the dead silence, I could only hear the erratic beating of my heart. I couldn't calm down. I took out my phone, saw it was 11 in the night and knew I was fucked.

'There is no way I can survive to 3. Fuck, fuck, I am going to die! We should have never summoned that bitch!' I thought bitterly. I laid my sweaty back against the cold cabinets. I was alone, and I wondered where Blimey was.

I touched my bare legs, and found something sticky on it. that's when the realization hit me. he was dead. the crone got the better of him.

[Anonymous No.23495864]

>>23495709
No idea what you're asking about, but make it obvious to the reader. Even just italics in the entire chapter may work. But dream sequences are usually bad

[Anonymous No.23495865]

correction
"Kek...! Kek...!!!" the crone laughed, covering her eyes with her veiny hands. "You will give me your body, Jonas!" she cried.

"I won't, you old bitch!" I responded with trembling legs. I grabbed my gun in haste, knowing full well it wasn't loaded, but hoping I could maybe crush her head with it. As I tried to open the exit door down the corridor, it shut on its own: Blimey's severed leg was pushing against it. I kicked it out of the way before I realized what it really was and ran as fast as I could.

Nearly stumbling through the campus hallways, I estimated I would be out of the campus in about ten minutes. It wasn't fast enough. There was no way I could run that long, I realized, as I could still hear the crone's cries and giggles behind me. Hearing her voice in the dead of the night gave me chills. I was terrified, my eyes wide open and taking in everything around me as I ran, hoping for some place to hide. My heart was pumping with adrenaline, my legs were weak, my bladder was about to explode. It felt like an eternity.

I passed through the central garden, kicking grass and flowers. I heard the sounds of boars around me and prayed they wouldn't freak out seeing a grown man running. After some time, I reached the main hall, nearly crashing into the cracked sliding doors in my haste. I opted to head into the student council room, as I knew Paul never took the time to lock it before going home. I closed the door, dived onto the ground, and hid behind the filing cabinets. In the dead silence, I could only hear the erratic beating of my heart. I couldn't calm down. I took out my phone, saw it was 11 at night, and knew I was screwed.

'There is no way I can survive until 3. Fuck, fuck, I am going to die! We should have never summoned that bitch!' I thought bitterly. I leaned my sweaty back against the cold cabinets. I was alone, and I wondered where Blimey was.

I touched my bare legs and found something sticky on them. That's when the realization hit me. He was dead. The crone had gotten the better of him.

[Anonymous No.23495881]

Threadly reminder that if you write science fiction or fantasy you’re basically retarded.

[Anonymous No.23495885]

>>23495881
are you writing at all, niggerman?

[Anonymous No.23495886]

>>23495576
So I wanted a character to say something similar to what Tyrion is telling Jon Snow here.

The thing is I wanted them to have a very obvious physical deformity that's really grotesque, but is not dwarfism or even size based. It also can't be too debilitating as it's medieval fantasy and they don't have wheelchairs or anything like that.

I was thinking they'd have a parasitic conjoined twin, but I wonder if that's a little too grotesque and if something like a cleft lip or clubfoot would be still something they'd be relentlessly mocked for.

[Anonymous No.23495916]

>>23495864
It's not quite a dream sequence, more like paranoid schizophrenic sequences. But the sequences gradually feel more real, bleeding into the normal world.

I suppose I am asking about how I could change the narrative voice to emphasize when the character crosses these thresholds. Or if changing the narrative voice is even a good idea. I find structuring sentences in an interesting way is a weak point of mine.

[Anonymous No.23495922]

>>23495881
>Isaac Asimov and J. R. R. Tolkien are retards
I can get having a preference in genres, but it sounds to me like you never opened a book in your life.

[Anonymous No.23495933]

>>23495886
Are we talking fully sapient twin that interacts with people? Or is it just sort of a head shaped tumor?

[Anonymous No.23495936]

>>23495881
Threadly reminder that gatekeeping seethers who are too chicken to post their work are too worthless to even qualify as sentient.

[Anonymous No.23495954]

>>23495916
"The Lathe Of Heaven" by Ursula K. LeGuin had a similar mechanism.

[Anonymous No.23495975]

>>23495686
YEAH, HOW THE FUCK ELSE IS THE HYDROELECTRIC DAM IN THE STORY GOING TO BE ACCURATE? I ADDED FLUIDS AT THE SAME TIME AS ELECTROMAGNETICS.

[Anonymous No.23495987]

>>23495975
You realize that fluid-flow equations can't be evaluated directly, that they have to be numerically integrated by computer?

[Anonymous No.23496041]

>>23495885
I produce finer work than you’ll ever be able to appreciate. Sorry, there are no space fairies in it. >>23495936
I speak truth, therefore I am.

[Anonymous No.23496048]

>>23495661
this reminds me of that one engineering autist that directly came up with several equations using physics to explain magic in his books.

[Anonymous No.23496058]

I'm not afraid of people calling my book shit, how I'm a shit writer, or people stealing my shit. Here's a free book while I continue to write my new one that's also shit.

https://litter.catbox.moe/rrmhyh.pdf

[Anonymous No.23496057]

>>23496041
. . . May I see it?

[Anonymous No.23496066]

>>23496057
He's going to claim that we're not smart enough to appreciate his writing. He doesn't realize that's not the flex he thinks it is. Imagine, to be unwilling to even part with a few paragraphs. Sad. And totally lacking in credibility.

[Anonymous No.23496070]

>>23496058
I'm not downloading your virus

[Anonymous No.23496074]

>Pastebin’s SMART filters have detected potentially offensive or questionable content in your Paste.
>The content you are trying to publish has been deemed potentially offensive or questionable by our filters, because of this you’re receiving this warning.
>This Paste can only be published with the visibility set to "Private".
wtf dude there's nothing sketchy about my shit

[Anonymous No.23496079]

>prose is primarily influenced by CAS and Lovecraft
>addicted to reading chinese mtl
>have cycles of mtl binging, stopping, then reading classic works by good authors in english
>repeat

Somehow, miraculously, my prose hasn’t become some weirdly purple ESL slop.

[Anonymous No.23496087]

>>23496066
eh, I mean he's gonna get dogpiled no matter how great his prose is just on principle. Come into a room and shit gold on the floor and you're still shitting on the floor

[Anonymous No.23496094]

>>23495881
Maybe, but sci-fi/fantasy is how you get mega rich these days.

[Anonymous No.23496100]

>>23495709
I'm doing something similar. Pastebin is being a puritan cunt so here's only the very end of my dementia/dream story, hope it helps you:
https://pastebin.com/5Q0yD1W8

[Anonymous No.23496103]

Any input about the opening paragraphs of this short story?

[Anonymous No.23496115]

>>23495576
The last time I posted in here (scifi noir pulp trash writer here) I wrote until I ran out of ideas. I've taken the time to sit, think, vibe, and figure out the back end of my novel. And now I have it (I think). All that's left is to slam out the prose. Just so everyone else knows, you can make it, and I believe in you.

[Anonymous No.23496138]

>>23495987
YEAH. WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M USING TO TYPE THIS?

>>23496048
OH BOY, I HAVE 20K WORDS WORTH OF NOTES DEFINING THE THERMODYNAMICS AND FIELD EQUATIONS OF MY MAGIC SYSTEM.

SAID MAGIC SYSTEM UTILIZES SIGILS THAT I'VE DERIVED FROM A SYLLABARY FOR THE VARIOUS SYNTHETIC LANGUAGES I'M DEVELOPING.

[Anonymous No.23496160]

>>23496074
This is why may anons here use litter.catbox.moe, or pastes.io, for such things.

[Anonymous No.23496166]

>>23496087
I don't think he has any prose to post. And if he does, and it gets dogpiled, it's his own fault for being such a jerk.

[Anonymous No.23496177]

>>23495933
Sort of a head shaped tumour, like picrel but not able to talk, it's not fully formed, and it's basically a lump on his neck that he cannot hide well and which is gross

[Anonymous No.23496197]

>>23496070
NTA but https://www.virustotal.com/ gave it a clean bill of health

[Anonymous No.23496243]

>>23496103
there's a lot of head hopping and it's quite disjointed. First you're describing the monster, then you're talking about how "I ignore it, my personal monster, etc."

This happens a lot in the following paragraphs as well.

[Anonymous No.23496274]

>>23496243
Thanks for the comment. I didn't realize it was not clear the girl was talking about two monsters; her pet and a newcomer.

[Anonymous No.23496313]

>give a guy I've known for a few years a sample of a chapter to read, since I've been talking about it
>he reads it
>"Yeah, it's good. I'll have to come back to it later and read it again, but anyway, back to my cat's explosive diarrhea..."

He hated it didn't he? It's over. It's all over.

[Anonymous No.23496321]

>>23496313
>give a guy I've known for a few years a sample of a chapter to read

Why would you put people in this position? Are you an autist?

[Anonymous No.23496338]

>>23496321
Yes, but that's beside the point. Every time I mentioned I was writing a story he seemed supportive of it. I thought it would be a good idea to get his feedback.

[Anonymous No.23496358]

>>23496338
Having met people who write and those who don't, it's easier to get feedback from those who do, but as a favor, they will expect your feedback on their stuff when the time comes. I find this exchange to be positive because you are not only writing your things you are contributing and, thus, learning from other writers who are, most likely, at your level. If you put a reader who does not write in this position he will see it as a shore, as he is not interested in the process, but in the product.

[Anonymous No.23496414]

>>23496358
So you're saying it's NOT a good idea to call up some people I haven't talked to in three years and ask them to be my beta readers?

[Anonymous No.23496466]

I have no fucking clue how to make my character react realistically without slowing the pace

[Anonymous No.23496470]

>>23496466
Make him act in a way that affects other characters or plot points.

[Anonymous No.23496474]

>>23496466
What is the scenario?

[Anonymous No.23496517]

>>23496474
He and his boss have been sharing dark secrets and doing shitty things together for some time. His boss now has enough trust in him to show him his dungeon where he keeps a girl in chains and tortures her for fun. He's supposed to feel disgusted, realize he has been going through a dark road, fight the boss, and free the girl.
The last thing I wrote was him seeing the girl.

[Anonymous No.23496522]

>>23496517
What kind of dark secrets were they sharing before his boss showed him this?

[Anonymous No.23496531]

>>23496517
Are you near the end of the story? Is this like the climax, the final boss battle? Or you want the boss to survive to play a role later? Because most people on seeing that would just shoot the guy on the spot.

[Anonymous No.23496539]

>>23496522
The main character manages the boss's workers so he was telling him how overworked he made them to maximize productivity. The boss was telling him how he took over a village by monopolizing food, raising the prices, giving loans to people so they could afford it, and then taking over all business in the village making everyone an employee of his and making sure that everyone spends all of their money in his businesses, making them slaves in a way. (Kinda like a company town & the company store)
>>23496531
Yeah, I'm near the end. I want a fight scene where there's a struggle.

[Anonymous No.23496541]

>tfw wrote 1600 words tonight
>tfw finished the fourth book of my big story as well

I'm feeling good, bros.

[Anonymous No.23496550]

>>23496541
You are in for a big surprise tomorrow when the adrenaline fades and you realize its all gibberish.

[Anonymous No.23496572]

>>23496517
do a very, very detailed description of the girl, and maybe have her start begging or crying or something. then describe the physical reaction of the guy. heart beating faster, shortness of breath, clenching his fists, thinking about the liquor he drank while sharing stories with the boss, the laughs, the jokes, have him realize he hates the boss and he hates himself, then have him go berserk

[Anonymous No.23496573]

>>23496539
Interesting

[Anonymous No.23496605]

>>23496572
I was thinking of having a dialogue but that sounds better. thanks

[Anonymous No.23496611]

I've completely stalled out. Any ideas?

[Anonymous No.23496629]

>>23496611
Keep a dream journal. Try to write reviews or comments on the media you consume, with no expectations.

[Anonymous No.23496668]

>>23495954
>>23496100
Thanks! I will study them later and see how I can use these to improve!
>>23496177
I suppose it depends on how you want him to be treated. Cleft lip or clubfoot is something I can see people laughing about. Make jokes about. But the twin would probably make them hate him. People might legitimately view him as a monster. Would you rather him be condescended to until he leaves the room, or yelled at until he leaves the room?
>>23496338
People usually want to read a full story, not snippets of it, especially not snippets that are mid story without any context that they would have gotten if they started from the beginning. It's why I never show my writing to anyone except beta readers until I have finished the editing process.

Also, even if someone is supportive of your writing that does not mean they would enjoy what you write, even if it had nothing wrong with it. I know a person who likes plot focused stories and finds stories that focus on character growth very uninteresting. We are incredibly close, but if I gave them a story I wrote based on character growth they would be bored to tears.

[Anonymous No.23496676]

>>23496611
Where are you at that you are having issues? Are you mid-story? Or are you having trouble thinking of interesting story concepts.

[Anonymous No.23496680]

>>23496668
Well he'd also be high ranking enough (and skilled enough) that most folk don't fuck around with him too much. I didn't want too much ripping off of Game of Thrones so his father doesn't have the scary as fuck reputation Tywin does.

Originally I wanted him to be a fierce warrior, so the twin or the cleftlip would be the only ones that would work. But I might make him a mage so a clubfoot probably would work as well.

I think you have a point, a mini twin head would probably be too gruesome for most people to accept being around.

[Anonymous No.23496707]

>>23496058
>I continue to write my new one

What's this one going to be about?

[Anonymous No.23496754]

>banned on /lit/ for 3 days
>wrote 9.5k words
maybe I should leave this website

[Anonymous No.23496756]

>>23496166
he's here every day and no, he doesn't write and doesn't know anything about writing kek

[Anonymous No.23496764]

Is there an alternative to Google docs that can sync my files between multiple devices?

[Anonymous No.23496774]

>>23496764
There is dropbox.

[Anonymous No.23496777]

>>23496774
No, I mean a word processor

[Anonymous No.23496802]

>>23496754
What did you do? Welcome back. We missed you.

[Anonymous No.23496803]

>>23496777
For me, it's obsidian+syncthing

[Anonymous No.23496806]

>>23496802
I genuinely missed /wg/.
>What did you do?
There was a thread that had nothing to do with books so I posted "jannies do your fucking job for once" and got a 3 day ban so yeah, don't do that.

[Anonymous No.23496827]

>>23496806
Lots of people get banned once or twice on this site, don't take it too hard.

[Anonymous No.23496846]

>>23496827
yeah, desu I laughed when I saw the reason for the ban, and it made me productive over the weekend anyway.

[Anonymous No.23496879]

I got like 2000 words done today. Good ones too, not slop ones.

[Anonymous No.23496880]

>>23496541
you should feel good
>>23496550
better to have something to edit than nothing at all

[Anonymous No.23496895]

>write the last line of my story I've been working on since fall
>the tears won't stop

It's beautiful, truly a masterpiece.

[Anonymous No.23496910]

This is better than whatever I can write.

[Anonymous No.23496912]

>>23496910

[Anonymous No.23496914]

>>23496910
children can write better slop than this. do better

[Anonymous No.23496917]

>>23496895
iktf brother, now time to send it off to the beta readers so they can interrupt that honeymoon phase

[Anonymous No.23496923]

>>23496827
>once or twice
lol
You're a newfag if you don't know how to evade

[Anonymous No.23496924]

>dude I generated X number of words today
So what? AI can do it faster.

[Anonymous No.23496926]

>>23496924
AI can generate slop at a remarkable pace, correct.
You can't generate shit because you're not a writer and you have no idea what you're talking about.

[Anonymous No.23496931]

>>23496924
AI writing still sucks absolute ass, and I say that as someone who thinks chatbots and image gen is neat

[Anonymous No.23496932]

>>23496926
>>23496931
That's not the point. If you're quantifying your artistic output, you might as well be generating AI slop

[Anonymous No.23496934]

Does it annoy readers when "suddenly, a monster appears", and characters drop their conversation to deal with it?

[Anonymous No.23496937]

>>23496934
Yes, it would annoy me. Unless the conversation was boring and needed to be interrupted.

[Anonymous No.23496946]

>>23496932
>If you're quantifying your artistic output, you might as well be generating AI slop
We're not quantifying the art, we're quantifying the work. If you knew anything about writing you would know first drafts normally suck and you need discipline and a constant output to get it done. Nobody is saying "I wrote 2k of the best writing ever written today!!" It's about momentum and I personally find the posts encouraging.

[Anonymous No.23496953]

>>23496946
Quality beats quantity. If you're just shitting words out on the page, you might as well be generating AI slop

[Anonymous No.23496961]

>>23496953
It's unbearably obvious that you don't write, anon.

[Anonymous No.23496985]

>>23496932
Depends, is there precedent for the monster appearing? Is there a good reason for the monster to appear at that exact time that makes it more interesting than, say, after the conversation?

[Anonymous No.23496996]

>>23496924
>AI can do it faster.
The mere fact you say this shows how low your IQ is.

[Anonymous No.23496998]

Do not EVER EVER write on your knee on a tight schedule.
It's extremely tiring.

[Anonymous No.23497000]

>>23496961
Joke's on you, I'm writing these words right now.

[Anonymous No.23497002]

>>23497000
>You won't because you don't write and you don't know what you are talking about.

[Anonymous No.23497008]

>>23496953
Claiming it's impossible to be skilled and quick is such a brainlet take. All you need is know what you want to tell and how to tell it. What are you just sitting there and staring at the walls for?

[Anonymous No.23497015]

>>23496827
>have dynamic IP
>turn off my router for the night
>fire up 4chan in the morning
>every fucking day I get the IP of some faggot who got banned for shitposting on /int/
Why the hell would anyone go to /int/ in the first place?

[Anonymous No.23497098]

>>23496274
Yeah, the yellow vs neon red monster needs to be a bit clearer, esp at the start when the reader is orientating. Should prob even start with the difference like "There's a new monster in my room tonight" [describe one] [then the other] [then rehab info etc]

[Anonymous No.23497112]

>write without a plan
>have fun with the story
>write an outline for the rest of it to ensure it makes sense and everything is wrapped up properly in the end
>seeing the outline, my brain now concludes the story as "solved"
>completely lose interest in continuing to write it, though I had so much fun with it
Why does this always happen to me?

[Anonymous No.23497126]

>>23497112
It used to happen to me, then I actually executed the outline and saw that it wasn't as 'solved' as I thought.
An outline is just an outline, there's still work to do if you want that story to be written.

[Anonymous No.23497551]

>Want to write
>Don't think I have the energy
>Nothing else to do
what the fuck is my life guys. I'm waiting back to hear from my editor so I've not got a lot going on

[Anonymous No.23497552]

How evil a thing can a hero do and still be a hero and I don’t mean like an antihero

[Anonymous No.23497571]

>>23497552
Showing no mercy is required to be a hero sometimes. It can be an evil trait, but it also necessary trait for a hero to save others. For characters that don't understand that, it is a big pain point because they may become afraid of the hero, or even stop trusting him.

[Anonymous No.23497623]

>>23497571
Would you consider Dexter Morgan to be an anti-hero?

[Anonymous No.23497651]

>>23497623
He's an anti-hero. Even if he looks like he is trying to do the right thing or follow a heroic path, he is too twisted morally to ever behave like a hero.

[Anonymous No.23497674]

>>23497623
>>23497651

That's normie tier tv adapted slop. Raskolnikov is an actual anti hero.

[Anonymous No.23497682]

>>23497674
No shit, Sherlock.

[Anonymous No.23497684]

>>23497551
do you want to be my fren

[Anonymous No.23497685]

Does anybody know any good creative writing exercises that you can do when you're out of brain juice but don't just want to do nothing?

[Anonymous No.23497691]

>>23497682
What I mean is Dexter is too cookie-cutter. It tries too hard to be deep, while only touching themes on a very surface level. The protagonist being an anti-hero is a caricature of the trope, not something a writer should be inspired by. If he wants to write an anti-hero he would be better off studying someone like Incandenza.

[Anonymous No.23497697]

>>23497685
Yes, it is called doing drugs.

[Anonymous No.23497699]

>>23497691
I should've made the caveat that there are better examples in lit than on tv, obviously you are right. I just didn't bother mentioning because he didn't ask.

[Anonymous No.23497704]

>>23497685
things that have worked for me
>flow writing
>pick 3 random things in your house, make up a story that includes them
>fanfic (only with characters you know very well)
>ask chatgpt for prompts (note: you will get very boring prompts, but good for just practice)
None of these should replace your actual writing it's just to keep the creativity juices flowing. If these seem pointless to you then I recommend trying a short <1000 words story.

[Anonymous No.23497707]

>>23497704
Too much work to reach what Noopept would do after 30 mins of waiting.

[Anonymous No.23497711]

>>23497707
but he asked specifically for exercises.
>Noopept
I simply smoke marijuana :)

[Anonymous No.23497716]

>>23497697
About 60% of you fuckers don't write and just exist as cheap starchy filling between the meaty nuggets of talent.
>>23497704
Sounds good. I'll give it a go. Anything to consider when trying to improve one area specifically? Lets say I wanted to improve the "Flow of the thing" Would it be better to try poems or epic writing?

[Anonymous No.23497717]

>>23497711
I find weed to be great for motivating and imagination, actually coming with divergent plot points that may or may not make it to the final version. It is a great drug, but most of the things that get written by it get edited later or turn into something else. A Nootropict will give you hyper typing so you can develop what you planned out while smoking weed.

[Anonymous No.23497723]

>>23497716
kek if you are writing without any sort of alteration in your conscience (even autism may work) you probably are a normie who thinks writing will make him hip or something. If your brain is not rotting and your dopamine and serotonin receptors are not getting fucked in the process, you are no artist.

[Anonymous No.23497750]

>>23497716
>Anything to consider when trying to improve one area specifically?
If you have something in mind then choose an exercise that will help that specific area. e.g. if you want to practice dialogue then do fanfic, if you want to practice characterisation then use the 3 random things prompt but apply it to a character. You'll know what you need. For example, if you suck at characters, it's probably good to avoid the fanfic option because the characters are provided for you.
>Lets say I wanted to improve the "Flow of the thing" Would it be better to try poems or epic writing?
I'm not quite understanding what you're asking for, but if it's for the way the prose flows, that's generally something that comes in the editing stage. This might be a good opportunity to try the memorisation exercise:
>read a scene from a book (that you think has good flow)
>try and rewrite it from memory
Then compare your prose to the author's and take note of any difference in stylistic decisions. Reading aloud helps with flow as well.
>>23497717
>I find weed to be great for motivating and imagination, actually coming with divergent plot points that may or may not make it to the final version. It is a great drug, but most of the things that get written by it get edited later or turn into something else.
Yep, that's it. I do a lot of planning while on weed but there's always needs to be a sober pass at some point. Stoner ideas normally come with an inflated sense of importance.
>A Nootropict will give you hyper typing so you can develop what you planned out while smoking weed.
I briefly tried modaf but I went a bit manic once and never tried it again. I think I prefer the relaxation of weed over a stimulant.
I was stupidly productive when I was taking it though

[Anonymous No.23497777]

>>23496058
thank you i'll be reading it.

[Anonymous No.23497821]

If people are reading my shit on RR but not really commenting or rating it, is it just that it's garbage? Is there anything I'm missing? Is the only way to get engagement putting money into advertising or something?

[Anonymous No.23497829]

>>23497821
>RR
why would you even

[Anonymous No.23497835]

>>23496058
just read the first chapter, I'm assuming you don't need notes if you're done, but good job anon, that is an accurate portrayal of what it's like to be a guy right now and the overwhelming nature of being online.

[Anonymous No.23497843]

>start working on family tree because some characters in story are related
>realize it's weird to have a bunch of 1-child layers to the tree because the average person has 2 siblings, iirc.
>start creating siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, etc following a normal distribution pattern
>tree is now huge and some of these characters have to be included into the story because it'd be weird if they existed and weren't, for plot-related reasons

[Anonymous No.23497845]

>>23497843
It worked for Garcia Marquez.

[Anonymous No.23497858]

>>23497821
If some kid doesn't comment that it's the best thing he's ever read within ten minutes of posting chapter 1, followed by a 5-star review, I'm afraid you have a flop.

[Anonymous No.23497866]

>>23497821
Just publish it traditionally like a real writer.

[Anonymous No.23497904]

>genre slop trilogy
>literary novella
I should probably finish the novella first, right? Easier to get one book published than a whole trilogy?

[Anonymous No.23497907]

Is it ok to write as an amateur? Like, why bother writing if I'll never be a great author?

I like creating my own stories and worlds and stuff but knowing that my work will never be appreciated by others negates that joy. Why am I doing this? Why would I?

[Anonymous No.23497908]

>>23497904
A novella will be harder as it has to be really good for a legit publisher to print it. Slop will be picked up by some merchant who wants to make a quick buck.

[Anonymous No.23497912]

>>23497908
>A novella will be harder as it has to be really good for a legit publisher to print it.
good point, and I'm not as confident in the novella idea as I am with my other project

[Anonymous No.23497913]

>>23497716
Post your writing faggot or are you too much of a pussy with no idea of what talent looks like.

[Anonymous No.23497918]

>>23497907
>Is it ok to write as an amateur?
Sure. But only if you are not going to seethe about not being a good writer. If you want to be a great author, you must go all in. It is too much work for very little reward, so unless you are sure you this is what ou want, never try to go pro. If you like to write just write.

[Anonymous No.23497920]

>>23497907
>Is it ok to write as an amateur? Like, why bother writing if I'll never be a great author?
Do you seriously need an answer to this question? Because I can give it to you but I think you already know the truth.

[Anonymous No.23497923]

>>23497866
I dropped out of one of the least regarded Universities in my country. I have no connections, in fact I probably have negative connects. Anything I send just goes into the bin. I am so sick of being in the bin. Maybe I should love the bin? But the bin can go fuck its self.

[Anonymous No.23497930]

>>23497923
>no connections
This means you do it in hard mode, which is not impossible. You can apply for a grant, awards, or any government-funded program that lets you submit applications anonymously or with a pseudonym.

[Anonymous No.23497939]

>>23497923
Once I heard an editor say that if a literary work is outstanding, it is almost impossible not to get it published. The literal work of editors and agents is to find good books and publish them.

[Anonymous No.23497954]

>>23497920
Your point is going over my head anon.

[Anonymous No.23497964]

>>23497954
>Is it ok to write as an amateur?
What's the definition of "amateur"? Do you think this is something you need permission to be?
>Like, why bother writing if I'll never be a great author?
You know who else had this thought? Every author you've ever admired.
Listen to >>23497918 it's good advice
Nobody else can tell you to write, and if you like it then who has the right to stop you anyway?

[Anonymous No.23497972]

>>23497939
What does outstanding even mean? These people will try to rip you off as much as they can with a bad deal. Getting you a 20k advance for work that should be earning you millions.

[Anonymous No.23497975]

>>23497972
>earning you millions.
>with artistic/literary fiction
I must live in a different timeline.

[Anonymous No.23497977]

>>23497972
most great authors were either nepobabies or died in poverty

[Anonymous No.23497981]

>>23497972
> Writing for money
Not gonna make it, at least have a more realistic goal like writing for bitches and booze.

[Anonymous No.23498010]

>>23497975
>>23497977
>>23497981
If you can write well and garner the right recognition, you can make deals with publishers and other media like tv and film that could earn you a good amount of money. Comparing past authors opportunities with today's abundance of media and entertainment does not make sense.

[Anonymous No.23498015]

>>23496058
Oh shit it's legit

[Anonymous No.23498018]

>>23497821
no, that's par for the course. less than 1% of your readers will leave comments, and they're usually no more than thanks for the chapter.
RR is a great site for giving you time to complete the story and you will get comments, eventually, and you should seriously consider whatever advice they give you, even if it seems retarded try and see it from their perspective and make some sort of adjustment

[Anonymous No.23498021]

Once I heard an editor say it's all about face height and frame and everything else was irrelevant. She said she can judge prose by how wide someone's shoulders are.

[Anonymous No.23498023]

>>23498021
>tfw broad shoulders are my only attractive feature
I'm gonna make it

[Anonymous No.23498024]

>>23498021
Wide shoulders are related to leading a better-than-average life, so she may be right,

[Anonymous No.23498187]

>>23498024
Damn, when do I get to cash in?

[Anonymous No.23498228]

Would it be immoral for a character to kill her mother because she was abusive?

[Anonymous No.23498250]

>>23498228
Not to protect themselves, no.

[Anonymous No.23498287]

>>23498250
No. More just a revenge thing.

[Anonymous No.23498288]

>>23498228
I don't think anyone would have an issue with self defense, especially if the character attempted to flee or tried to restrain the mom first, only killing her once they realized they had no other choice.
If it's a revenge thing, you'll need to make the mom a real nasty cunt or readers might have misgivings. I'm talking full on regularly beating her kid, constantly hurling vile insults, sabotaging the kid's life, murdering their beloved pet bunny in front of them, etc. Maybe even some rapey shit.

[Anonymous No.23498401]

I'm fucking stuck and I'm going to explain why I'm stuck to you in the hope it unlocks something in my brain.
>I know what I want chapter 5 to end on : a cliffhanger in which the main character meets the girl he's going to have to protect for much of the plot
>I know what I want chapter 4 and the first half of chapter 5 to be : a chase scene, in which the result is clue #2
>I know that chapter 3 should net us the main character getting his hands on clue #1
Clues #1 and #2 should in some way be used to deduce the location of the girl, leading to the MC going there but for the life of me I don't know what the fuck they could be. I always circle back to the same question
>Yes, but why did [dead guy] lead them on this wild and impractical goose chase?
So here we are. Trying hard to think of something that will seems extremely obvious in hindsight

[Anonymous No.23498413]

>>23498401
Things like this are usually addressed on the rewrite, once you've pinned down the theme. The theme then acts as a filter. For now you should just come up with something generic and cliched as a placeholder. Your subconscious will eventually connect the dots and replace that with something more suitable but it needs something to push against to start.

[Anonymous No.23498418]

>>23498401
is the MC a detective?

[Anonymous No.23498422]

>>23498418
He's a high school student.

[Anonymous No.23498428]

What is your writing method guys? I write, let proofreaders pick it apart, put in non-retarded critique and then send it off to chatgpt for errors openoffice doesn't catch. Then I give the outputs a careful read. when a chapter is finished, the entire chapter gets processed and locked from revision. I wish to actually finish this thing that's why.

[Anonymous No.23498431]

>>23498428
good for you? I just write the damn thing.

[Anonymous No.23498433]

>>23498418
To put it simply, yes.

>>23498413
I actually already have my theme, but maybe you're right, I should just go on.

[Anonymous No.23498442]

>>23498413
I have to disagree. That works for most things but if it's a murder mystery the clues are vital.
>>23498422
>>23498433
I don't know who I am replying to, but basically think about whether they have investigated a murder before or not. If it's a detective, what would stand out to someone who's seen dead bodies before?

you know the end result (the girl's location) so you could try working backwards. What would be a clue that would give away the location, and what could you take away from it? Make whatever you take away from it clue #1.
e.g.
deduction: the girl's location
clue #2: a website with her address
clue #1: the website's url

obviously I have no idea what the context of the story is but I'm throwing shit at you to get your brain going

[Anonymous No.23498456]

>>23498401
when he finds the girl what condition is she in? captured? or totally oblivious and just chillin?
captured you can have other people who want to find her which is what starts this whole thing. or maybe he runs across a message that just strikes him: Help! essentially. maybe the clue #1 is he witnesses her being kidnapped off the street, or he sees her in a car and she tries to signal to him she needs help. otherwise how does he even know about her in the first place

[Anonymous No.23498468]

>>23498413
no you faggot, don't be lazy and plan these things out beforehand. ideally you got no loose ends and everything serves a purpose. You should have themes and rough plotlines prepared first.

[Anonymous No.23498523]

I want it so my healer needs her cat in order to do magic, but I don't want a familiar-based system where everyone junctions to an animal or spirit in order to do magic. How can I make this work?

[Anonymous No.23498526]

>>23498523
The cat did a cat and swallowed the magic stone needed to conduct rituals.

[Anonymous No.23498527]

>>23498523
Go back.

[Anonymous No.23498534]

>>23498526
But I want it so when the cat dies she is left powerless. If the cat ate a magic rock she could just dig it out of the corpse and be fine.

[Anonymous No.23498535]

>>23498523
something on the cat's collar? >>23498526 is good
but it's hard to say because
>I want it so my healer needs her cat in order to do magic
and
>I don't want a familiar-based system where everyone junctions to an animal or spirit in order to do magic
contradict each other, unless you're asking if you can write it so only she needs an animal to do magic?

[Anonymous No.23498539]

>>23498534
The cat drank the Very Rare Magic Potion and now he's the one with the magic juice

[Anonymous No.23498542]

>>23498535
I like familiars, I just think they're overdone and cliche at this point.

>>23498539
That might work. Like the cat's very cells are infused with magic.

[Anonymous No.23498547]

>>23498523
make the cat a piece of her soul that got split off due to -reasons-
which makes it so when the cat does die she can eventually bring it back after going on a spirit journey, or something, which will allow your readers to forgive you for killing the cat

[Anonymous No.23498563]

>>23498523
make her a lightning mage instead of a healer
she "casts" electricity spells by just petting her cat really, really hard
you can do like a parlor trick taken too far kind of story

[Anonymous No.23498568]

>>23498523
make her a complete faker that brings her cat along to goad her cat into healing things then she parades around like she did it.

[Anonymous No.23498581]

>>23495709
I suggest weed or trying some other substance while writing those altered state parts.
More sensible advice: you could play around with repetition to evoke a sense of deja vu in the reader. Have a uniqu sentence or a small list of sentences and disperse them throught the book.
You could play around with the character's perception too by making his/her awareness very small or very big. Spend a sunny afternoon in a park or a field without any particular plans. Watch the ants, touch the grass, look really closely at a flower, etc while converting your experience into words as an exercise.
I like your idea and don't like that other anyone's idea of making it all in italics. I'm happy to offer more suggestions if you wish.

[Anonymous No.23498596]

>get trad published
>make 30% per sale
>have to do all your own marketing

or

>get self-published
>make 70% per sale
>have to do all your own marketing

Is there literally any reason at all anymore to go the traditional route?

[Anonymous No.23498613]

>>23497907
Everyone who has ever "made it" as a professional author began as an amateur, and many never shake that feeling. I know a lot of very talented writers, musicians, etc who have had no widespread exposure; that doesn't mean their stuff isn't important to them and me and the few people who were lucky enough to experience their art. Being loved by a handful of people, or even just one person in your life, can be oddly more fulfilling than the adulation of a million strangers.

[Anonymous No.23498627]

>>23498596
your book will be on the shelves of barnes and nobel

[Anonymous No.23498652]

>>23498627
Can't you do that with self publishing too? I've heard people say theirs is. I know you can upload an ebook to B&N, but I'm not sure how they handle physical copies.

[Anonymous No.23498657]

>>23498613
It's hopeful posts like these that make me return to these threads.

[Anonymous No.23498673]

>>23498596
trad
>get advance of five or low six figures
>because of pub house prestige and its connections possibly win awards or short/longlisted increasing hype and exposure
>pub house's other authors forced to give soundbite praise on your cover increasing hype and exposure
>pub house's connections get you reviews in reputable media massively increasing hype and exposure
>pub house reps push a few copies of your book to every bookstore they can locally and internationally and if the bookstores don't return your unsold copies within 12 months they count as sales.
I used to work at a university bookshop. If the guy in charge of returns missed the return window on three unsold copies of a book bought from the rep 12 months ago (regardless of publishing date) we were now stuck with them forever and would heavily discount it to make shelf space. The pub house still got their money from the sale a year ago. I wonder what % of book "sales" actually ended up in a customer's hands.

[Anonymous No.23498684]

>>23498613
*to clarify:
>Being loved
I mean this artistically but moreso personally. You will be long dead and gone in a few billion seconds like everyone else. Live your life as you see fit before you disappear.

[Anonymous No.23498694]

>>23498673
>get advance of five or low six figures
Do you have to give it back if your book doesn't sell enough copies for the publisher to at least break even?

[Anonymous No.23498712]

>>23498694
I don't know personally but I don't think so. It's a contract. They've bought your book off you. They evaluated it as a product and committed to it. Everyone involved except them still gets paid if it flops. An actor still gets his even if it bankrupts the studio. But I guess if your first book doesn't do well enough they might not ask you back for a second.

[Anonymous No.23498718]

The problem with trad publishers if after they print it and it fails they still hold the printing rights so you can take it and self publish it on your own anymore.

[Anonymous No.23498721]

>>23498287
I would not call her a good person, but I think lots of readers would understand why she did it and would not consider her a villain. It's kind of a gray area.

[Anonymous No.23498723]

>>23498673
>get advance of five or low six figures
No!
if you crack a five figure advance you're lucky

[Anonymous No.23498732]

>>23498694
>break even
I think most books don't. But the mega sales of Harry Potter, Reacher, etc. offset their losses so they can still publish smaller books knowing they won't sell amazingly. Seems very egalitarian and underdog supportive but most likely something more cynical driving their charity.

[Anonymous No.23498741]

>>23498718
>they still hold the printing rights so you can take it
I meant can't*

[Anonymous No.23498750]

>>23498723
I stand corrected. The few I know who got five or low six had publishing histories (shorts, essays, mostly online, but nothing big like The New Yorker) that ranged from scant to established. Maybe this is a bigger factor than I thought. Their writing (prose style, character portrayal, content and all the rest) was nothing blinding; the bland will inherit the earth.

[Anonymous No.23498760]

Past writing history shouldn't matter. If the current work is good that's all that matters.

[Anonymous No.23498776]

>>23498596
Well a trad publisher will proof read, suggest edits for your book, do with cover and book formatting and typefacing. Also put it on book store shelves and maybe do some limited advertising. Obviously you can do most that as a self-pub but it takes time, a lot of time, all of which takes away from the act of writing. It's up to the author to decided what works for them.

[Anonymous No.23498782]

Is it bad to begin a sentence with "thus" in this day and age?

[Anonymous No.23498792]

>>23498760
I agree. But they're a business. And in the same way that a Hollywood star's light will fade if they disappear for years or are notoriously hard to work with, publishing houses are, I think, looking for known quantities easily categorized. Oh, you're that sci-fantasy guy with x followers and consistent output who we know and like. Safer bet than the unknown genius with something legitimately interesting and new. Sad, but seems like a core principle of many businesses is being unimaginative and never taking true risks, even though they're covered by the big hitters.

[Anonymous No.23498802]

>>23498782
I think "thus" could only be used wryly, like with a mock epic tone, comedically. Or if the character or narrator is a pompous academic, or if the story is set in Ye Olde Days.

[Anonymous No.23498841]

The biggest drag of trad publishing is waiting the 2-5 years it takes to get picked up when you could be selling on Amazon by tonight.

[Anonymous No.23498878]

>>23498782
Depends on the tone of the story and the setting.

[Anonymous No.23498879]

>>23498782
depends on the context. If you're laying out a series of arguments, thus is a good and unpretentious way of saying "apply all that shit I just said, and here's what you get."
For instance, if you're writing like a legal argument or something you could say "The law is that if X, then Y. In this case, there was X. Thus, it must mean Y." and I don't think that would look silly or antiquated.

[Anonymous No.23498898]

>>23498878
>>23498879
It was "Thus began his habit of ... "
For now I changed it to "So began his habit ..."
Not sure which is really better.

[Anonymous No.23498914]

I am trying to make a villain less actively malicious and more unhinged.

It is revealed that the reason she looks so young is that her current body is actually that of her daughter.

What I currently have is that her body was rotting away, and at the skill level she had at the time, she could slow down the disease, but doing so was a constant drain on her power, and she couldn't stop it entirely. So she had a kid with the express purpose of eventually taking their body as her own, which she did once the sickness was close to killing her. She then used this opportunity to slip away as she was infamous but made sure her daughter never got much limelight so she could continue her work with less scrutiny. This is supposed to show her ruthlessness further.

I'm thinking of keeping most of those elements. Instead, she never planned on using her daughter's body, but when her daughter died in an accident, she thought, "Eh, why not?" And in her mind, she believes she is honoring her daughter by using her body as her vessel. I think this leans more towards displaying her opportunism and her skewed values.

[Anonymous No.23498922]

>>23498898
Definitely the latter. Thus is only used formally or in a dated time period. iirc it's an abbreviated of the archaic 'thusly'

[Anonymous No.23498953]

>>23498922
Ok thanks, I'll go with that then.

[Anonymous No.23498964]

>>23498898
"So began" is better, but even that is a little effected.

[Anonymous No.23499105]

>>23498723
$10,000?
Is that really where the bar is?
Are you supposed to churn out 10 books per year to survive?
Do you get more after publication?
I make 6 figures designing circuit boards and it's way easier than writing 5-10+ decent books.

[Anonymous No.23499116]

>>23498914
Maybe if they were particularly distraught over the death of their kid? And if you're really going for the unhinged angle, having them "talk" to their dead kid when they look into a mirror might work, but it might also be a bit cliche. A near-death experience or the villain's actual death being very similar to what killed their kid might also be neat.

[Anonymous No.23499138]

>>23499105
ideally your book actually sells and you start earning royalties
but the fact of the matter is that only a small group of mega authors prop up the entire industry, and the vast majority of authors never hit their advance number

[Anonymous No.23499142]

>>23496611
https://www.theatlantic.com/books/archive/2024/06/creative-writers-block-slump-book-recommendations/678663/

[Anonymous No.23499145]

>>23498782
only if the sentence also ends with "thus"
>Thus!
not many can pull off this kind of flourish, though

[Anonymous No.23499149]

>>23497015
It usually takes longer than a night for a DHCP lease to expire. Perhaps you're the faggot who got banned for shitposting on /int/?

[Anonymous No.23499159]

>>23497552
Good triumphs over evil, but only if good is more violent and even nastier than evil. This is epitomized by the very odd Clark vs. Superman fight scene in the movie "Superman 3".

[Anonymous No.23499169]

Are flashbacks generally frowned upon? I'm writing one that explains the events 3 years earlier of why my two characters are hostile toward each other. I feel like it doesn't add a whole lot, but if I cut it it seems like a lot will be missing, if that makes sense. Like the story technically works if you don't know what caused the fight, but at the same time knowing does enrich the lore.

[Anonymous No.23499174]

>>23496070
Microsoft Defender also declared it clean.

[Anonymous No.23499181]

>>23499169
you can sprinkle in references to what happened without explicitly making a flashback scene

[Anonymous No.23499184]

>>23498021
>face height, frame, wide shoulders
I think her judgment of writers is directly related to how much she wants to get nailed by him. Hopelessly typical female.

[Anonymous No.23499189]

>>23499116
>having them "talk" to their dead kid when they look into a mirror might work

That might make for some good foreshadowing. Like I can make it seem like she's talking to herself, but when you reread it with that context, it becomes clear she's talking to her child.

>>23499169
Personally, I really dislike long flashback sequences.

[Anonymous No.23499235]

>>23499189
>Personally, I really dislike long flashback sequences.
How long is too long?

[Anonymous No.23499246]

>>23499235
If I had to give a word count, I'd say that 500 words into the flashback is when I start to check out.

[Anonymous No.23499257]

>>23499235
It's completely subjective and kind of a silly question. It should be as long as the story requires.

[Anonymous No.23499307]

Pretty much every big selling sci-fi/fantasy series has long flashback segments. They can't really be hated that much... Personally I like them.

[Anonymous No.23499321]

>>23499307
with established authors you know they understand pacing and are very purposeful; you can have faith in the payoff— despite this, using flashbacks is still debated
i would recommend against it if someone was asking for advice. ‘if you have to ask’…

[Anonymous No.23499509]

>>23499307
My issue with them is that they often pause the main story to reinforce the information we've already gleaned.

[Anonymous No.23499570]

Now I don't know if I should cut my entire flashback chapter. It's like 2200 words.

[Anonymous No.23499588]

>>23499570
lmao, my first draft I had a FOUR CHAPTER long flashback. Readers were not impressed.

[Anonymous No.23499589]

>>23495881
so you admit you can't conceive of how fantasy might take many forms, not just the D&D scenarios you seethe about?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Momo_(novel)

[Anonymous No.23499603]

>>23499589
Then why does every American only seem to write high fantasy or slop science fiction?

[Anonymous No.23499610]

>>23499603
I think you are looking at YA novels, which are usually badly written softcore erotica aimed at teenaged girls. Don't get your story suggestions from TikTok.

[Anonymous No.23499613]

>>23495661
I want to write a legal thriller with jurisdictionally correct footnotes with parentheticals. The problem is that all my lawyer friends don’t read, and all my friends that read wouldn’t get it.

[Anonymous No.23499651]

>>23499603
Because, despite your high opinion of yourself, your mind is so simple that you can only deal with the real world in terms of generalities and strawman arguments (e.g. "every American"). You're a living embodiment of the Dunning–Kruger effect.

[Anonymous No.23499672]

>>23499651
Booktok is only a thing in America so I don't know what you are saying.

[Anonymous No.23499679]

>>23499610
>softcore erotica aimed at teenaged girls
How do I get in on this? Without looking like a pedo, I mean.

[Anonymous No.23499746]

>>23499672
false, retard. you remain btfo'd

[Anonymous No.23499769]

>>23499679
YA can also be written for adults in their early 20s, it's just it feels like people who read that stuff has the reading comprehension of teenagers. They are irritatingly popular right now so I imagine it would be fairly easy to get published. Or do self advertising.

To write a YA novel, I have some pieces of advice. Do you start with a concept, then make a beginning and end, with the story progressing naturally? Do you write out your scenes so they progress the plot and give organic character growth? When you write a trope, is it put there because it makes sense where the plot is going?

Don't do that. The book isn't about the story, it is about the trope. Setting? Just set dressing. The complex political situation that is occurring is just so the female protagonist and the male protagonist fuck. Have them hate each other at first, gotta get that "enemies to lovers" tag up. Send assassins after her, because you need to also put it into the "action" category, can't have it be a battle of wit or else people might fall asleep. Emphasize a power imbalance between the male and female character, make on of them royalty, make them star-crossed lovers, you need that tag. Find an excuse to have them do the "there is only one bed" thing. Have the two characters have no fucking clue why they are into each other, they just gradually realize the other one is "perfect" for some undefined reason, this is a romance and they will love each other, no matter how much their personalities clash from throwing in all these tropes. Abusive parents! Girlboss! Gay best friend! Tropes come before the narrative ALWAYS. View things like a corporate suit looking at a graph, going "people like X, so will add X" with absolutely no nuance.

Either have the male lead be a huge fucking asshole with a "soft center" and treat it like it makes up for all his asshole behavior. Stalking, kidnapping, even attempted rape? It's fine, he is a nice guy now! Or go the other way and have the male lead so gentlemanly and supportive of the female lead it borders on pathetic to give it a feminist narrative. Show that somehow he is the only man who WON'T attempt to rape her, and this example of being a decent human being means they deserve each other.

Examples of YA stories are Twilight, Gothikana, and Throne of Glass.

Lastly, if you write this you are required to give me your home address so I can give you one free punch to the face.

[Anonymous No.23499794]

>>23499679
>Visit Wattpad dot com.
>Browse the horror section.
>Realize that women are absolutely fucked up, and nothing you could ever write will be able to match their level of depravity.
Just use pen names, anon-kun.

[Anonymous No.23499803]

anyone else struggle to develop characters, and give a shit about them? i feel like if you're focused on theme/plot, it's because you already have lots of experience (confidence) in incorporating characters after the fact...
or are neglecting something
i am jealous of the anon who are writing out character sheets and getting excited about it

[Anonymous No.23500038]

>>23499803
How many characters do you have? I only have two in my story, so I feel like I've gotten to know them pretty well, even though I didn't explicitly map them out or anything.

[Anonymous No.23500185]

>>23500038
>I only have two in my story
What is it, a story of two dudes stranded on a deserted island?

[Anonymous No.23500186]

>dont feel like writing all day, feel dont have any idea what I'm going to do next for my story
>lay down for bed, really need to get to sleep so I dont sleep in
>mind instantly wanders to my writing project and spend hours working out problems and thinking up new details

Why cant I do this during the day when I can write it all down and actually make progress

[Anonymous No.23500226]

>>23500186
Happens to me literally every time. I woke up at 4:30 a.m. today doing this.

[Anonymous No.23500230]

>>23500186
>>23500226
same

[Anonymous No.23500355]

>Want to write my story about a Mahjong addict
>Also want to grind out Hanchans to hit expert again
Help

[Anonymous No.23500380]

>Write 700 words
>Mentally exhausted
Oh my god bros is it over?

[Anonymous No.23500625]

>>23500185
>two dudes stranded
gay

[Anonymous No.23500626]

slop

[Anonymous No.23500670]

>>23500380
No, it's normal. Creative writing can be exhausting.

[Anonymous No.23500689]

>>23500626
Yeah, most everything here is. Just a bunch of morons writing about magic elves.

[Anonymous No.23500710]

>>23499613
>footnotes
Lawyers generally don't use footnotes when writing legal documents. Footnotes are more for judges and law review writers to kind of go on a little tangent about something without disrupting the flow of their writing. You also sometimes use them when citing to nonlegal websites, but practicing lawyers don't do that a lot unless they're writing an amicus brief or something, which probably isn't going to show up in a legal thriller, because they're kind of boring and worthless.
Most states have pretty clear guidelines that they promulgate, so find your state, and then look up [state] legal citation guide. Or if you're in fed. court, then just use the bluebook.
>parentheticals
A legal parenthetical is just a case description. They follow the same bluebook format in most jurisdictions. You write out the case cite, open parentheses, then start with an -ing verb, then explain the case.
example: Bitch v. Cunt, 69 K.Y.S.2d 420, 433 (2016) (holding that premises owners have a duty to make premises as safe as they reasonably appear).

[Anonymous No.23500768]

>>23500689
Speaking in generalities, while deliberately missing the specifics, is one of the classic signs of being a sociopath. Not that that's a surprise to anyone.

[Anonymous No.23500794]

>>23495576
Is it bad if I realize my work is solidly "airport novel"? Or do I embrace it?

[Anonymous No.23500826]

>>23500794
End it with MC getting on a plane that is about to get blown up/crash.

[Anonymous No.23500870]

>>23499794
This is so true that it's absurd. I've dated more than one woman that got more turned on from movies like Se7en and Saw than any RomCom.

One was an biologist that did gene studies and she explained to me her hypothesis for it. She asked me, "Which women do you think lived longer and had more babies while humans were evolving: The ones that got off on brutality and terror, or the ones that resisted it?"

She argued that women had masochistic and macabre fantasies because millennia of being treated like objects, assaulted, raped, forced to give birth without modern medicine, forced to endure monthly bleeding with no real understanding of why, etc, led to a selective pressure that favored women that embraced these things over women that crumbled, rebelled, or ran away.

This altered my writing significantly. I had previously believed that women preferred the damsel-in-distress trope. That they wanted female characters that maintained dignity and purity even in the face of great evil.

That's exactly the opposite of what women like and you can test this yourself, like I did, by writing some smutty short stories for sites like AO3. Make an account for "pure princess" type stories and one for "princess gets debased, defiled, humiliated, and/or corrupted" and see which one gets better ratings and who's in the comments. In my experiment, the "pure princess" account never gained a following, got mediocre scores, and were read mostly by men, but the "defiled princess" account exploded and the comments were 90% women raving about it.

There's nuance to this, though. They can tell when you use something like rape as a shallow plot point and will hate it. They especially seem to hate seeing a woman's defilement used as motivation for a male character, unless that male character is set up to lose to the defiler. One of my best-reviewed stories was one where the hero came to rescue the corrupted princess and was himself raped and humiliated by the villain, and the corrupted princess even helped the villain do it. The hero underwent forced feminization and became a sister-wife of the princess. I got a DM offering $10k to meet irl for that one.

[Anonymous No.23500886]

>>23499613
>footnotes
it's demodé at this point, I don't think is a good idea, normal people won't get it, and /lit/icenz will think you are pretentious

[Anonymous No.23500900]

should i take a class? i like to write but i'm terrible at it, i can never get more than a couple pages deep into anything. my main problem is breaking stories/plot structure, all my ideas are just aimless vignettes without any real arc

[Anonymous No.23500904]

I want some 4chan writer slop. Recommend one that can kill some time for me today senpai.
Wandering Inn was okay.
Beware of Chicken was better, until it fell into being the thing it was parodying unironically.
Saga of Cosmic Heroes was acceptable, female protagonist held it back, but did a good job promoting other series since the author at least has decent taste and their reviews were worth creeping.

Bring out your slop.

[Anonymous No.23500907]

>>23500900
Sure, sign up for a class or a workshop. You will know people who also enjoy reading while having a good time. You don't need to be an ambitious aspiring pro to take a writing class, the same way your dream doesn't have to be a chef to take a cooking class to cook for your girlfriend or whatever,

[Anonymous No.23500909]

>>23500904
>4chan writer slop
I think DFW is the only writer regarded as 100% 4chan-core.

[Anonymous No.23500914]

>>23500904
Since you insist.

[Anonymous No.23500921]

>>23500904
Mother of Learning.
Azarinth Healer.
Beneath the Dragoneye Moons.

[Anonymous No.23500927]

>>23500921
>MoL
Iirc that one is some kind of insane smash hit so I guess I better at least try it. Fine. Let's see what third worlder children like so much.

[Anonymous No.23501018]

I just pounded out 426 words in about ten minutes and boy do I feel good about it. We're gonna make it, all of us.

[Anonymous No.23501027]

I finished my story and I'm scared of sharing it with anyone. Is this common?

[Anonymous No.23501043]

My writing style tends to be episodic, where the chapters don't continue right after the past one. How can I make my narratives flow better.

[Anonymous No.23501049]

>>23501043
I meant make them more continuous.

[Anonymous No.23501053]

>>23501027
Yes. We're our own worst critics, and letting others see what we've made can be scary. Post a page or two and see what people think, then listen to the good advice while ignoring the bad. You go this.

[Anonymous No.23501054]

>>23501018
>426
ok?

[Anonymous No.23501056]

>>23501043
Start as late as possible and finish as early as possible

[Anonymous No.23501073]

>>23501054
I'm proud of it because I'd been struggle to write that much in even a hour. Yesterday I wrote about 50 words, so doing that much in such a short period made me feel good.

[Anonymous No.23501078]

I find it easier to rewrite a scene from scratch if it isn't giving the right feeling compared to editing a preexisting one.

[Anonymous No.23501088]

>>23501053
Here is the story:
https://pastebin.com/cx335Rfj

It's 3265 words. Read as much as you feel like and tell me what you think

[Anonymous No.23501090]

>>23500904
read my slop! its complete. although as a warning it has explicit scenes, but they're roughly 5k words total out of 350k
https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/40361/erased

doing another editing pass, up through chap 46 atm, because when I posted it initially I added maybe 5 or 6 chapters to the draft while releasing in the middle - and the beginning had issues. I'm currently 67k into the sequel which has a different mc. My goal is to finish this pass by the end of july to send it off to an editor. and I'm taking a break from drafting the sequel to edit this because the two mc's are different and I don't want to cross contaminate the voice. also being 67k into the new mc really has given me some insight to her character and it's allowed me to tweak some of the interactions/dialogue in this one. my goal is to start posting the sequel serially by november/december-ish while doing a simultaneous kindle release for this one.

I hope everyone is doing well and making progress on your projects.

[Anonymous No.23501098]

>>23501073
You can write 500 words in /wg/ in 15 minutes.
Cut your ethernet cable you fucking addict.

[Anonymous No.23501152]

>>23501088
My biggest complaint is that the MC has no issues with Alfred enslaving an entire town, even seems impressed with it, but gets upset at a woman in chains. Maybe have him grow less and less enthralled with Mr. Alfred's methods and have the girl be the last straw. Makes it less of an "out of the blue" moment.

[Anonymous No.23501157]

>>23501098
No, it wasn't being here. Hell, I wasn't on here yesterday. I just stared at the screen and was unable to write anything really. Today is better. Quit trying to ruin my moment and get to work on your own stuff.

[Anonymous No.23501174]

>>23500921
>Mother of Learning.
>Azarinth Healer.
Both are horrible garbage, Jesus Christ. I understand some 12-year-old gushing about them on reddit, but anon, a /lit/izen, unironically shilling slop of this level? Fuck off, you were supposed to be better than this

[Anonymous No.23501176]

>>23501152
Or at least make it apparent he puts pussy on a pedestal.

[Anonymous No.23501178]

>>23501152
I will add a hint somewhere that he has a soft spot for kids and make the girl younger.
What do you think of the prose? Its quality is my biggest concern

[Anonymous No.23501192]

>>23501174
He asked for slop, I gave him slop. No one would claim they are peak /lit/erature, but they all do the progression elements of "progression fantasy" very well and frankly that's all their readers care about. What's wrong with pulp fiction anyway? It has always been a part of the market.

[Anonymous No.23501204]

>>23501178
Assuming that this is a first draft, the prose is fine. It could use a bit of polish and finetuning, but it's definitely better than a lot of the slop that gets posted here.

[Anonymous No.23501230]

>>23501178
>I will add a hint somewhere that he has a soft spot for kids and make the girl younger.

[Anonymous No.23501257]

>>23501204
Thanks, bro.
>>23501230
Kek

[Anonymous No.23501281]

>>23501192
He asked for slop written by 4channers, which is still barely excusable in this thread, and you came shilling the blandest piss on the internet

[Anonymous No.23501319]

Just finished this after a long stint. Not doing anymore. My brain is turning to mush. I want this to be horrible, almost difficult to read (In an artistic sense), but is it too far? It's a really rough 1st version, but I want some feedback.

[Anonymous No.23501323]

>>23501319
>no indents, just a giant wall of text
Congration you done it.

[Anonymous No.23501374]

>>23501319
>Reddit spacing instead of indents
Do people read books anymore?

[Anonymous No.23501379]

>>23501323
cool, I'll throw in a few shift spaces at random.
>>23501374
That was just where I cropped the page because it ran over a little, but I wanted it to stay readable for your sake.

[Anonymous No.23501439]

I want to set my story in eastern/central Europe in the early 20th century, something like Prague. Problem is that I've never been to central Europe.
Would that be a problem and can it be fixed by going on google map for a day and just walking the streets.

[Anonymous No.23501452]

>>23501439
>can it be fixed by going on google map for a day and just walking the streets
Might help with a sense of direction and locations, but not much else. Watch travel shows about the area and documentaries.

[Anonymous No.23501473]

>>23501439
>Problem is that I've never been to central Europe.
Why not fucking go, dude? Like actually.

You live in times where you can be anywhere in the world within 24 hours, why aren't you?

[Anonymous No.23501482]

>MC occasionally confuses herself and calls people names of characters that died
>Beta readers too stupid to realize she has ptsd and complained about it being a waste of words
What do?

[Anonymous No.23501490]

>>23501482
Trash your book and write litRPG slop instead. Make MC's numbers go up and have him sex sexy ladies.

[Anonymous No.23501594]

I have to think about my plot to unstuck it, but I don't think about it, I just think about thinking about it and about how I'm not actually thinking about it when I do that.
help

[Anonymous No.23501601]

>>23501594
how's it stuck? giant plot hole or you just don't know how to get to your next big event?

[Anonymous No.23501704]

Finna boutta write a sex scene with a girl whos totally of age wish me luck bros

[Anonymous No.23501738]

>>23501473
There's just the minor problem that it costs an arm and a leg, and expects you to get a passport and sell you soul and data to CIA

[Anonymous No.23501739]

Are physical descriptions of characters really necessary? I know that too much can hurt, but is it possible to do without? It's a romantic story about that summer after senior year before everyone moves away, short-lived, passionate relationships, star-crossed lovers type shit. If one kid is in the marching band and one kid is on the football team, that should be enough for the reader to be able to rotate the apple, right?

[Anonymous No.23501768]

>>23501739
No need to go too deep into it, but at least give a mention to hair length & color, skin tone, size and weight.

[Anonymous No.23501769]

I seem to only be able to write stories in an episodic format. How to fix,

[Anonymous No.23501775]

>>23501768
Is it autistic or thorough to write out the physical descriptions of my characters even if I don't plan on including it in the story? Inseam, cup and band size, shoe size, etc.

[Anonymous No.23501782]

>>23501769
Take the beginning of the next chapter and think of a way to make it the end of the current chapter.

[Anonymous No.23501812]

Does this sentence make sense?

>Gertrude, with the most convincing theatrics, learned from her profession, convinced any audience she had vested interest and valuable information gleaned upon her.

[Anonymous No.23501821]

>>23501812
Yes, but I'd drop the second comma

[Anonymous No.23501833]

>>23501812
I'd cut "gleaned upon her" as it's redundant, at best.

[Anonymous No.23501845]

>>23501601
More like the latter. I can have my characters chasing a McGuffin for two chapters and it'll get them where they need to go, but writing the outline, it feels very artificial.

[Anonymous No.23501859]

Okay my bros, I cut my 2400 word flashback chapter to a 441 word summary and squeezed it into the middle of another scene where it fits more naturally.

I'll use the original draft and change some bits and turn it into a separate short story so all those pretty words aren't wasted.

[Anonymous No.23501862]

Just the foreplay to this sex scene has gone on for 600 words. The female audience better be happy.

[Anonymous No.23501871]

>>23501845
are they in a city or out in the country? in the city they can run into all sorts of stuff that gets in the way, you can create a whole new subplot as they stumble and bumble around looking for whatever, and then you can use those characters later if only to add a more lived in feel to you story. out in the boonies it's harder, but maybe not, maybe they run into who knows what and that gets them to where they need to go
what's the gist of what they're looking for and why do you feel you need to spend 2 chapters having them wander around? you could just have them arrive

[Anonymous No.23501879]

>>23501862
I find the actual sex scene easy to write because 90% of the work is done beforehand with all the buildup to it
and the reality is if you're writing a book with erotica in it your audience probably skews female. hell, the general reading audience skews female.

[Anonymous No.23501906]

>>23501879
Females are addicted to sex. The average one gets it twice a week. It's as natural to them as taking a piss.

[Anonymous No.23501919]

>>23501906
I want to have sex with a flat chested petite 18 year old.

[Anonymous No.23501939]

>>23501862
Post it. I'll tell you if I get a boner or not

[Anonymous No.23501943]

>>23501738
You can write your insipid fantasy Europe without experiencing real Europe then.

[Anonymous No.23501946]

How do you guys keep track of your character's personality types?
Do you use the Briggs Meyer Test or Big Five Test?

[Anonymous No.23501947]

>>23501919
I think it's safe to say we all do. But that's why we have to write fiction, because it will never happen.

[Anonymous No.23501949]

>>23501946
>How do you guys keep track of your character's personality types?
Thanks to my limitless schizophrenia.

[Anonymous No.23501953]

>>23501946
Those tests are pseudo-science fluff. I just write their traits and form a mental image of how they look and talk and go from there.

[Anonymous No.23501956]

>>23501879
How graphic do these scenes end up? I can't recall seeing more than a line that acknowledges what was going to happen. I haven't read a lot in general, what would be a basic book to start with? 50 Shades?

[Anonymous No.23501957]

>>23501953
>pseudo-science fluff
I agree because its all self-report style nonsense but I am interested in using them as categorization tools

[Anonymous No.23501967]

>>23501956
With erotica, it really matters whether you're writing short stories or full length novels. I'm not sure what the latest, big erotica novel is, but Literotica is great for short story stuff.

[Anonymous No.23501970]

>>23501956
This is for a webnovel so I can be as explicit as I like. And the audience loves it so I indulge.

>>23501939
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1wtS7dBwE7415g95H9lsVybl4Kg-4XFt8wPQfuNVMU9A/edit?usp=sharing
Enjoy

>>23501879
Good smut writing is exponentially amplified by having good characters. Women have a lot of patience.

[Anonymous No.23501984]

>>23501970
This reads like it was written by a woman. I don't know if that's praise or not but you do you.

[Anonymous No.23502000]

>>23501984
NTA but if it's erotica that's a good thing.

[Anonymous No.23502012]

Why are women so perverted? I can't even imagine being addicted to reading such a genre.

[Anonymous No.23502019]

>>23502012
Think about reading a fantasy novel or something. You want to see some action, usually action is violence and conflict. But what if the action were sex instead? A good sex scene can be just as enjoyable as a good fight scene and is elevated, just like a good fight, by strong characters and motivations.

[Anonymous No.23502037]

>>23502019
in my opinion the key difference between a good sex scene and a good fight scene is that the buildup and dialogue carries the sex scene - because the actual mechanical description of the act and sex organs make the scene less sexy, so euphemisms are preferred. there is absolutely nothing sexy about using what is essentially a scientific word like vulva or cervix. the fight scene, on the other hand, your reader needs to understand how your characters are moving and how things are happening so the actual scene needs to be more mechanically laid out.

[Anonymous No.23502055]

>>23502037
I'm very specific when writing smut. I know not everyone writes this way but it's my style and I have no issue with having to rely on "scientific" terms. Vulva could just as easily be "soft pussy lips" and there's no need to mention the cervix unless you're writing "omg dick so big" type smut which is just tacky imo.

[Anonymous No.23502062]

>>23495576
What's a passable reason for a fictional form of radiation slowing organisms down?

I was thinking it'd be something like "the radiation is toxic to the nervous system" or something

[Anonymous No.23502067]

>>23502019
Except fight scenes aren't dirty and embarrassing.

[Anonymous No.23502072]

>>23502055
>soft pussy lips
is a thousand times better. or if you get vulgar something like cunt, or any other slang, really. but I find it's more effective when you use those terms in dialogue, like the girl is whimpering - probably something like, no stop, and the guy is telling her she's only a dumb cunt to be fucked, and by the end she agrees with the guy that's all she's good for as she has some eyes rolling back in her head orgasm. the actual mechanical motion of the scene? who cares. rely more on dialogue, I'd say.
granted, variety is the spice of life

[Anonymous No.23502074]

>>23502067
They should be to the loser

[Anonymous No.23502077]

>>23502067
fight scenes can and should be dirty, just a different kind of dirty

[Anonymous No.23502078]

>>23502062
>Slows metabolic functions
>Affects cognitive function
>Hinders ability for oxygen to be absorbed/used

[Anonymous No.23502085]

>>23502067
>Getting embarrassed at your writing.

Write what you wish. Some books are extremely explicit you have no idea. And if you enjoy it, and your audience enjoys it, who are you to deny them, and yourself, the pleasure?

[Anonymous No.23502101]

>>23501970
Yeah this got me hard. That is quite a bit of effort to put into just some nipple play.

[Anonymous No.23502328]

>>23500870
>The hero underwent forced feminization and became a sister-wife of the princess.
hmm

[Anonymous No.23502452]

Obesity or fatness is a moral failing, as it demonstrates a lack of self-control and temperance. An obese person is thus unreliable, weak, and turpid, and therefore much likelier to be psychopathic and sociopathic, a backstabber.
Thoughts on this?

[Anonymous No.23502457]

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius has become a meme in philosophy, the first recommendation to anyone who asks. I found the first portion funny, though, due to the stark differences between our immediate family.
What have you learned or inherited from your elders? Write it like our lil' Marcus here, if you will.
As for me:

From my grandfather Louis, shortness of stature, for he was short and fat like a pig.
From my father, sobriety and self-control, for he was a drug-addict and neurotic like a woman.
From my mother, critical thinking and asociality, for she was autism and mental illness.
From my tutors, self-awareness and humility, for they taught me high scores in tests are worthless in the end.

[Anonymous No.23502461]

>>23502452
It could be from poor parenting. My dad fed me fast food every day after school, and again for dinner. As a kid I didn't know better, because what 7 year old does, and it tastes good so why not? Then when you learn about a real healthy diet it's hard to shed all the weight, and even if you do, there's sacks of loose skin you can't get rid of without surgery.

[Anonymous No.23502462]

Obviously things change, but I'm aiming for around 15-20k words for short story 1 of my 5 story collection. Seems like a good length.

[Anonymous No.23502479]

>>23502461
Indeed, in those circumstances you're right.
I was thinking of my uncle when writing that. The bastard refuses to lose weight even though he's on death's door because of it, and he is pretty much a psychopath.

[Anonymous No.23502529]

>>23498581
Thanks! I personally think that a skilled writer should not have to rely on fonts for this kind of stuff. At least, I don't like to in my writing, I am much more forgiving when others do it. I definitely will need to try writing scenes switching between these modes.
>>23501946
I usually have my characters serve an important purpose, and I write how they are around that purpose. There was a character who ran a business and who some other major characters worked under. I wanted him to sort of be an authority to the main character, but also comforting, so I made him very nice and warm. Then, as I write about him, I remember what he has done in the past and make sure nothing conflicts with his pre-established character. So two characters under his employ for whatever reason have issues with each other. X wants to get closer to Y, but Y wants nothing to do with X.

I decided he would act sternly, but since he is warm and kind, he would be reasonable. His answer was telling X not to bother Y unless Y is okay with it. X and Y still have to work together because this is a business he is running, that can't be helped, but he does his best to prevent problems from occurring. The actions build upon the character, and will color their other actions.

But before I wrote the character? I usually keep a document with aspects I need them to fulfill.

[Anonymous No.23502575]

I think maybe, perhaps, foolishly, might understand why I've been on a multi-year long writers "block" for writing a longform story - I've never actually completed one before
Seems like a stupid observation to realize after decades of writing, but it really did just dawn on me that all I've ever finished have been short prose, both in length and in concept. My longest "story" at 28k was just 3 shorts smashed together concurrently. In other words, I never had to really think about involved plot structures and dynamic characters because they've always intentionally been 1.5 dimensional. That the numerous long form attempts have sunk beneath endless notes shouldn't be surprising when I've always drove my plot into a wall so there wasn't anything left to write about. Which, of course, is a bit of a problem if I naively want to say "well then just write a short that's a sequel to your short"
So uh yeah, guess back to learning fundamentals then. Not that my ego is above it, just feels bizarre to think about. Especially since I've been able to still write during this "block" but kept bungling it and not understanding why.

[Anonymous No.23502585]

>>23502452
if you want a caricature to beat up sure
otherwise 90% of fatties are literally the polar opposite

[Anonymous No.23502597]

>>23502585
>literal big fat hogs with no self control or temperance shoveling food and drink into their faces
>90% of fatties don't lack self-control and temperance
explain

[Anonymous No.23502605]

>>23502597
He's a fat hog in rationalization mode. He felt called out.

[Anonymous No.23502613]

>>23502575
Is that so? Good luck, anon. Best wishes.

[Anonymous No.23502614]

>>23502610
>>23502610
>>23502610

[Anonymous No.23502637]

>>23501775
No, it just means you're a lawful plotter. Nothing wrong with that. I tend to be a chaotic plotter.

[Anonymous No.23502672]

>>23502012
Men have been pawing at them since well before the age of consent, and you actually wonder how they come to conclude the world revolves around their vagina?

[Anonymous No.23502714]

>>23501319
>No kissing
>These two obviously don't like each other
>0 chemistry
I hate it. I loathe it.

[Anonymous No.23502851]

>>23502062
Destruction of cells leading to death.

Good luck sprinting when you're dying inside.

[Anonymous No.23502888]

>>23502461
>Then when you learn about a real healthy diet it's hard to shed all the weight

Fatoid cope

>and even if you do, there's sacks of loose skin you can't get rid of without surgery.

Lose weight slowly, combine with fasting for cellular autophagy and a dermaroller. Unless you are a my 600lb life tier giga whale it will be fine, skin is very adaptable. Being fat as an adult is revolting, there is not a single excuse orher than a manifest lack of any kind of self control. I wish we could round up all the fatoids and throw then into a fat camp that has nothing but stairmasters, electrolyte water and bunk beds until they can squeeze out of the normal person sized gaps in the camp bars.

[Anonymous No.23502950]

>>23502888
>Admits to cruel, fascist leanings
Doesn't surprise me at all. I'd rather be fat than be a horrible human being inside like you are.

[Anonymous No.23503022]

wow, look at this pile of crap: https://files.catbox.moe/d9sukc.zip