/lit/ makes a magazine

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/lit/ makes a magazine Anonymous Wed Mar 1 21:53:08 2023 No.21730168 [Reply] [Original]

Crude Awakenings Edition, or; Look Mom, I'm Left Handed!

(Selections from the World's Foremost Literary Society—)..."Disparage me not!"
>Two Shakes of a Single Speare Edition, or; Issue №15, The One with the Red Sweater, Starring (among others, Courtney Cox)

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Anonymous Wed Mar 1 21:55:40 2023 No.21730175
File: 374 KB, 960x540, Copy of IG (13).png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jaAE2aYhyQ
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jaAE2aYhyQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jaAE2aYhyQ
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jaAE2aYhyQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jaAE2aYhyQ
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jaAE2aYhyQ

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:01:46 2023 No.21730209 the return of the king

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:06:04 2023 No.21730226 >>21730168 ITS HABBENING

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:06:29 2023 No.21730229 File: 1.57 MB, 986x1399, Screenshot_20230301_170420.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] !?

>>	nesmer !XfgPwJA7M6 Wed Mar 1 22:07:18 2023 No.21730231 File: 107 KB, 640x640, CB127718-E8BC-4305-8E2E-32FEF2D75B8F.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730168 &ampbros… They try and they try but they cannot stop us :)

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:11:31 2023 No.21730248 Really happy that I got published! Though I'm a bit bewildered I still got introduced as anonymous. Still, thanks so much for letting my story be on this issue.

Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:14:52 2023 No.21730264
File: 308 KB, 1241x1275, 1677699287601042.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21730248
my apologies. i don't have much backup on the floor and i'm not very good at marshalling resources. which piece was yours? going forward, if you prefer attribution, let me know in the original submission email.

>>	࿇ C Œ M G E N V S ࿇ !BbgOdnm9tc Wed Mar 1 22:18:14 2023 No.21730276 >>21730168 I. AM. SO. GAY!

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:18:20 2023 No.21730277 >>21730264 >https://LampByLit.com It happens. It was Skype by Remember_Summer_Days. I should've been more clear in the email too. Thanks again!

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:20:03 2023 No.21730282 >>21730168 >>21730168 Is there an option to download all uptodate published pdf's in a single compressed file?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:20:45 2023 No.21730284 >>21730277 checked. i sincerely apologize. continue to write and contribute. i won't let ya down again!

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:21:33 2023 No.21730286 >>21730276 We know, cumgents.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:21:48 2023 No.21730288 File: 30 KB, 620x349, s925r7axhmr61[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730282 no but i'll do it right now, hol up

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:23:20 2023 No.21730294 >>21730288 Thanks a lot, based sir. I wanted to save all this time but that would be too much clicking. also checked.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:26:31 2023 No.21730307 >>21730168 Neat illustration on page 60, where'd you get it?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:27:12 2023 No.21730314 >>21730284 >https://LampByLit.com Yeah, I look forward to contributing more stories! Though around what time is the next issue supposed to come out?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:29:04 2023 No.21730325 no letter from the editor in this one :(

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:29:43 2023 No.21730331 >>21730314 those hand drawn ones? those are from weeby J, contributor and manic academic extraordinaire

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:30:43 2023 No.21730336 >>21730325 way too much content. didn't even get all the submissions in. of course as always i have to spam the pages with art as well

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:31:44 2023 No.21730342 >>21730314 should be able to do it in one month (heh)

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:33:32 2023 No.21730353 >>21730336 probably the result of last year’s &amp threads. your shill team was out in full force for a bit there

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:35:07 2023 No.21730364 >>21730168 aww shit yeah!!

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:38:16 2023 No.21730372 >>21730353 i owe all the shills a great and forceful gratitude for their work. there's even more coming down the pipe.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:39:16 2023 No.21730379 >>21730294 gonna take me a little bit but i'll include a link to the masterzip ITT

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:42:45 2023 No.21730393 whats the best of &amp drama that sneed was talking about in the &amp website chatroom

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:45:50 2023 No.21730402 >tfw my hamlet essay didn't make it I am suffering.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:49:04 2023 No.21730412 >>21730402 SC, i got you senpai, fret not; your place is reserved in 016.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:50:04 2023 No.21730415 >>21730175 Incredible, lmao

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:52:28 2023 No.21730429 >>21730393 IDK, but what happened to best-of anon and the rest of the helpers? The whole thing went dead.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:53:00 2023 No.21730430 >>21730412 You're on the ball ever since you left prison lmao. Thanks editoranon.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 22:57:24 2023 No.21730450 >>21730393 i imagine the selection of the best was controversial. there may have also been a case of cyber bullying. i was predisposed during this period. >>21730429 it is being developed in the background. should be here in a month (heh) >>21730430 XD

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 23:00:27 2023 No.21730468 >>21730450 who was cyber bullying who?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 23:07:55 2023 No.21730500 Has anyone read this issue? What’s good and what’s shit so I can skip

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 23:08:04 2023 No.21730501 File: 128 KB, 717x719, PAUL_IN THESE DAYS.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730168 >burger >Chicken Kurtz Enjoyed all the poems. Nice to see the Chicken World shout out. Very nice.

Anonymous Wed Mar 1 23:14:31 2023 No.21730529

>>21730450
I think the selection in the end was more or less decided upon, but it felt as it stalled then, and anons were then getting a bit too chatty about covers and (esp.) illustrations, while others thought it could've been done by then, but instead it didn't, and went silent. That it's still on is cool though; sometimes those things take time, even if longer than needed (like the /lit/ Moby-Dick release, for example; to say nothing of &amp 015, but with this I always thought it would come through, and would you look!).

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 23:45:43 2023 No.21730653 You have genuinely made me very happy by dropping this today :)

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 1 23:59:55 2023 No.21730718 File: 31 KB, 750x483, 1674652296037639.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Happy to see my writing in this magazine finally. I'll submit more this month.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 00:02:19 2023 No.21730727 >>21730168 You guys still accepting submissions right now, or are you gonna clear the backlog first?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 00:12:22 2023 No.21730762 It LIVES

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 00:20:23 2023 No.21730800 >>21730718 What did you write

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 00:32:55 2023 No.21730866 >>21730168 >one of my poems and my signature got in hype hype hype

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 00:36:21 2023 No.21730877 >>21730800 flash fic called Face of Carthage, originally intended for flash anthology's "object at the bottom of the sea" prompt.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 00:43:34 2023 No.21730902 >>21730800 >>21730866 >>21730877 blessing from kek, these repeating numerals have been checked. >>21730727 also accepting subs.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 00:47:58 2023 No.21730916 >>21730800 >>21730866 >>21730877 checked, and kekd super excited to see my stuff in print, now on to the next one. thank you editor-in-chief for fueling a brief pipe-dream i had last year, heres to a grand future!

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 01:09:12 2023 No.21731021 File: 69 KB, 459x512, 1614796063745.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >by anonymous >author names every second submission

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 01:59:58 2023 No.21731234 >>21731021 if you use your imagination you can easily tell the whole story of why it's like that all on your own.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 02:48:02 2023 No.21731416 >>21730325 write us a letter about what you’ve been up to and post it in this thread editor-kun

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 02:50:54 2023 No.21731423 >>21731021 But they ARE all anonymous nobodies

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 03:14:40 2023 No.21731512 I love it. The designs are always next level.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 03:54:15 2023 No.21731612 >>21730450 is input still needed for the greatest hits release? or do you have it all in the works already

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 05:45:23 2023 No.21731882 >>21731612 Input is always appreciated

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 05:53:27 2023 No.21731914

Read through the whole thing. A lot of good stuff, really I dont think I could call anything on this issue bad.

But my favorites were:

Gundels drive,
Nearer to the end,
The anon coffee story,
Nina,
Undiagnosis.

Living with the reeds was great but I felt like the ending was unfortunate. Is the narrator, who says he left reality for something greater, someone to be self-aware enough to know that he's in a 'dream' and that the Reeds would actually hate him? Hopefully I'm not giving the wrong impression cause theres a lot of good stuff in that piece anyhow.

The top 2 ones, imo, were Kurtz Chicken and Austin 3: I6

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 05:54:29 2023 No.21731920 The best stories in here should be considered for best of &amp too

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 06:05:15 2023 No.21731950 Also, kinda interesting to see so many stories about suicide, drug abuse, and references to Dionysus on the same issue. Funny how that worked out

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 06:36:53 2023 No.21732060 >>21731914 Reread Living with the Reeds. It seems to be very literal. I think it’s a play on the whole schizo living in the walls meme.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 06:37:26 2023 No.21732063 Sawtooth cycle Coffee zone ended well. I'm not smart enough to understand Face of Carthage. Burger poem. Seems like chicken is the new burgerpunk. Who wrote that Bojangles story awhile back?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 08:58:27 2023 No.21732461 >>21732063 >I'm not smart enough to understand Face of Carthage Why can't these mf post in these threads and explain themselves

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 11:10:47 2023 No.21732672 Wow, as if it didn't have enough ESL garbage, now it has ISLs (Italian). Real pseud stuff. Design is fire tho

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 12:46:20 2023 No.21732801

>>21732063
>>21732461
It's a short story about a post-singularity humanity with a different form of consciousness. I am building some other stories in the same setting so I hope together they will make more sense. It's a contemplation about the relationship between hypocrisy and death.

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 13:21:20 2023 No.21732869

>>21732063
What did you think about the bojangles story? My main feedback is I went too far with making overwhelmingly long sentences. I will edit and submit for next issue otherwise I am doing the story about the kids fishing with their dad, which is more quaint.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 13:47:25 2023 No.21732918 File: 501 KB, 639x1028, 1677608590096822.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21732672 >Wow, as if it didn't have enough ESL garbage, now it has ISLs (Italian). Real pseud stuff. Design is fire tho

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 13:54:21 2023 No.21732927 >>21730168 unironically love you guys dont tell me i’m a cunt

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 13:57:40 2023 No.21732931 >>21731914 >>21732063 I’m glad you guys dig Coffee Zone. EditorAnon good work formatting that.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 14:06:05 2023 No.21732944 >>21732931 I recall being one of the posts in that "coffee zone pic" request but I can't remember which. Didnt expect to see it.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 14:27:49 2023 No.21732997 Fuck yea, today is a good day, and OP was NOT a faggot

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 14:27:54 2023 No.21732998 What did you guys think about my Skype story? Good things and bad things about it. Looking for any feedback, I want to improve as a writer.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 14:31:52 2023 No.21733005 Face of Carthage filtered me too. But I thought using Italian, even if it filters people, is not an issue. Honestly pretty interesting choice, I like it when reading makes me wsnt to learn new things

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 14:43:47 2023 No.21733028 Anyone got thoughts on Sawtooth Cycle? It was well outside my typical wheelhouse and didn't utilize my typical strengths of writing but I don't want to treat that as an excuse for poor performance.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 14:55:22 2023 No.21733072 >>21730500 I'm 31 pages in The page 31 story in tiny text is the best so far. page 18 and 19 joke is funny page 20-21 story also good, but not the winner page 25 is there for the brits

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 15:07:48 2023 No.21733106

>>21733028
I thought it did a good job anon. Nothing about it was bad, though I also can't comment on anything about it that was remarkable. Why did you want to write a story that didn't play to your strengths in the first place?

But yeah overall I thought it was good

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 15:19:44 2023 No.21733135

>>21733106
I make a point of writing outside my comfort zone because I think I learn quicker that way. Also, I sent it here because I thought it would play well with the audience compared to a straight up pulp action piece.

Unfortunately, "good but unremarkable" is a very common reaction I get on my writing which is hard as shit for me to work with.

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 15:30:03 2023 No.21733152

>>21733135
Sorry I didn't give you something to work with. Let's see, I really loved this sort of prose. 'The city was beneath a neon moon and at the mercy of flooding markets. '

A prof once told me that readers know what's wrong with your story, but it's up to you to figure out why it's wrong. So I think my suggestions will boil down to personal taste you might not agree with.

But I would've had the protagonist be more extreme in his conflict, more emotional, maybe he teeters in and out of despair. I would also spruce up the prose with more literary devices, metaphors, repetition, hyperbole, etc.

I mean your story had some of add, but I would've taken it further. Again, my suggestions might be outside of your preferred style.

Hope this helped a bit more

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 15:31:53 2023 No.21733155 >>21730168 The cover in the pdf says Jan instead of Mar 23...

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 15:44:30 2023 No.21733185 >>21733028 so far one of my favourites, I’m a sucker for dystopias, the world building felt comfy, especially how it unfolded naturally, but the actions of the characters felt too wooden, too cliche and very trope like.

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 16:11:54 2023 No.21733254

>>21733152
Thanks anon

>>21733185
I tried to use the dialogue to highlight a contrast between the narrator's perception of the world and what's literally occuring as a means of implying he has basically gone insane.

But of course, theory and practice are two different things.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 16:16:57 2023 No.21733270 >>21732869 I liked the Bojangles story. (and any fast food punk in general)

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 16:17:59 2023 No.21733275 >>21732801 I'll have to read it again with that in mind.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 16:20:22 2023 No.21733282 >>21730231 Write another book faggot

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 16:21:01 2023 No.21733285 Congrats to all the anons published in this issue

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 16:36:14 2023 No.21733338 >>21730168 Where's my story you shit eating goofy penguin lookin ass muthafucka ?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:30:08 2023 No.21733517 >>21731612 According to Cur8ranon, it’s mostly all finished.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:33:35 2023 No.21733528 >>21732672 Bro, RPV’s libretto is gorgeous. If you dissect it line by line, it has even more depth than any RPV you’ve ever read. There is a reason why it comes first. It is honestly one of the finest submissions I’ve ever received, if not the best.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:35:54 2023 No.21733539 My story is not published... Not even in such a group of anonymous schizoposters and shitposters. Really hammers down point how much of failure i am. My story was one about guy who gets transported to alternative world after smoking some spice

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:36:37 2023 No.21733542

>>21732998
It’s good that you are able to compose in the long form. The writing style of Skype is colloquial, or written somewhat like a monologue. Be sure to have edited it as much as possible before submission. Overall I thought it was good, if perhaps somewhat depressive, however fun to read. Make sure not to stop.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:46:49 2023 No.21733574 >>21733155 Checked. Where do you see that? The cover always has the publication month and year in the top right, this one says Mar 23

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:47:49 2023 No.21733580 >>21732801 >a post-singularity humanity Huh. I just assumed he was "exalted" through historical distance and the relationship with the wife was just extreme closeness

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:48:55 2023 No.21733585 >>21733338 Look harder. You’ll find it. >>21733539 If it was longer than 3k words, it will go in 016. I remember your story, it hasn’t been forsaken. Send it once more so that it’s newer in the inbox. I promise you haven’t been left behind.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:50:12 2023 No.21733590 Reading something written in Italian by an English speaker gives me a funny feeling

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 17:51:52 2023 No.21733599 Anyway this is great

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:03:01 2023 No.21733649 >>21730229 please gib thoughts on this

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:05:38 2023 No.21733662 >>21733649 I'll try reading it cause I couldn't get through it the first time around. The format is way too hard to read. Idk if this was the editor's fault. It is great to see someone experimenting but this felt like too much.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:07:22 2023 No.21733672 >>21733590 I’m pretty sure he’s Italian. Find an error, protip, you can’t

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:09:18 2023 No.21733688 >>21733585 >If it was longer than 3k words Oh, my story was longer than 3k words. Sorry I called you a penguin

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:12:38 2023 No.21733703 >>21733585 Nice job on the design btw. It pops. Reminds me of quintessential "lit mag for the internet age", chaotic and discordant. Might I suggest toning it down a bit on the visuals on pages with a lot of text? It gets a little too busy .

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:13:47 2023 No.21733710 >>21733574 The online pdf and on-site display of the issue say Jan, the higher quality print pdf says Mar (as do the image on the site and in op).

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:18:06 2023 No.21733735 >>21733688 Checked. I am a penguin.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:19:07 2023 No.21733742 >>21733703 Facts. Thanks anon

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:21:35 2023 No.21733749 >>21733710 yikes! thanks. fixing that now. also, to the anon who wanted a master zip file of all the issues, still putting that tongether. thanks!

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:23:57 2023 No.21733758 'Decision making risks and benefits' reads kinda ESL but I like it.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:24:15 2023 No.21733759 >>21730229 nice. you been published in &amp before?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:30:31 2023 No.21733786 >>21730529 OK, looking forward to it coming out soon. After all that did the cover ever actually get decided on?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:30:57 2023 No.21733788 File: 771 KB, 1014x866, Screenshot_20230302_132947.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21733662 here is an updated version that is easier to read >>21733759 first time. soon to be 2nd in 016

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:33:17 2023 No.21733798 >>21733749 >>21733710 yeah fuck, wordpress has this awful bug where if you add media with the same filename as another file, it will only ever display the old file.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:34:17 2023 No.21733801 >>21733788 checked and heiled. i'll make sure to do you better for 016

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:39:31 2023 No.21733828 >>21733801 you published it as I gave it! no worries editoranon, but I will send you an updated COTARDS SNAKE

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:48:45 2023 No.21733854

>>21733786
Not sure it did; there were some good minimal covers, maybe ultimately it looked they'd settled on something which many liked, but there was also still people getting worked up about classical little-magazine covers and Egon Schiele paintings...

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 18:51:49 2023 No.21733866 >>21733672 yea no

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:02:53 2023 No.21733911 >>21733866 Checked. He’s better with the words of any given language than the average any given speaker of said language

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:08:02 2023 No.21733933 >>21733798 >>21733749 >>21733710 fixed. good lookin out, thanks G

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:10:21 2023 No.21733942 File: 24 KB, 960x540, Copy of IG (1).png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21733828 oh yes please do. thank you kindly. well met. >>21733854 i sort of want to relive the drama a little so i've been trying to dig up threads from the archive

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:11:54 2023 No.21733945 >>21730175 Wow didn’t know we were so closely associated with Jackie Earle Haley

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:16:07 2023 No.21733956

>>21733945
yeah so Shem and i actually went to school high together, graduated cum succa, top of the pineapple, lotta frauleins let me tell you. lotta haters too. anyway when we both got drafted and subsequently cloned, his clone went onto do movies where he actually found an impressive degree of success, and my clone went onto splinter into several hundred subclones, the best looking of which went on to found this esteemed publication. couldn't have done it without him.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:22:23 2023 No.21733977 >>21733945 Hm. Half of Shem is David Cassidy and the other half is JEH…

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:23:37 2023 No.21733983 >>21733977 checked. yes shem himself was a clone of his own clone (somehow) plus the genetic material of seventies teenbopper heartthrob david cassidy yes that is true thank you for reminding me

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:26:02 2023 No.21733991

>>21733942
There was a ton of drama over the googledoc comments because anons asked for views on each story and then when a couple nominated ones got roasted a few took it personally and started hurling insults. The one where the gay guy has "gay sex" with a girl was situationally hilarious but that one had a lot of arguments, also debate on which K-anon story is best.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:26:41 2023 No.21733993 >>21733672 Not quite, but thank you for the words of praise. >>21733590 Funny how? I'd be curious to know.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:29:59 2023 No.21734006 File: 1.82 MB, 1019x1002, Titled.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21733993 RPV IS AMONG US

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:33:23 2023 No.21734015 File: 59 KB, 700x347, 554786186bb3f78f7d33ba2f.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21733590 >>21733993

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:34:31 2023 No.21734022

>>21733991
wow now i really need to see it.
to be real the Greatest Hits is a heckin valid idea however in my mind i always preferred the idea of reprinting an issue that showcased my fave writers, like ꝛc, rpv, k-anon, oggy, chris, weeby, ari, icn, johah, dbs, and all of the turbo regular writers that are decent desu. the Greatest Hits should definitely be a thing, plus i believe it will be released in book format, not magazine format. The Greatest Hits is being handled by one of our strongest contributors, not me, so i shall bear no creative control over its curatorship and/or release. just the way i like it.

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:35:43 2023 No.21734028

>>21733993
Despite what the editor seems to think I didn't mean to diminish the work, which I liked a lot.
Nor I'm implying any factual grammatical error (and if there are any I missed them and I don't really care to check). it's the way sentences are constructed, I can see the writer thinking in another language, if not actually translating from that language. No italian speaker would use the gerund (the -ing form) like that for example, That strikes me as something an english speaker would do.

And it's not something I ever experienced before, That's why it's funny to me.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:40:37 2023 No.21734054 >>21734022 is it still the same guy curating it? afaik he dipped a while back and hasn’t posted about it since last year

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:40:48 2023 No.21734055

>>21734028
nice. didn't mean to imply anything. i'm pretty defensive of rpv. mostly because i recognize his genius. i don't speak italian so i will definitely take your word for it, however i also suggest reading his other work, because his style has always directly tinkered with language and verbiage and grammar and syntax, even his english work.

also, in order to properly appreciate Il Canto di un Pazzo, you need to copypasta it into an online reader or translation app and get the computer to read it to you in italian. then it actually sounds properly like an opera. godspeed tho, i know you meant no harm.

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:47:17 2023 No.21734080

>>21734055
unless you can speak italian, in which case you should be singing it aloud instead of simply reading it
>inb4 OP is RPV
>>21734054
yes as far as i know. in my most recent correspondence with him, he talks about how the curation process is finished, and now he simply has to do all of the publishing work (which is considerable if not substantial (you probably know what it takes to publish a sexy book (it takes a lot))). he likened it to the Moby Dick Commentary project, which, if you remember, was and continues to be the very finest book ever fully and actually self published by /lit/ (hilarious, flawless, beautiful). So you can imagine that it could take a while.
I'm stoked because I just saw an ad for ANOTHER collaborative effort that featured Oggy as well. this board is by far the most productive and creative space on this website.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:51:50 2023 No.21734102 >>21734080 There's a physical copy of /lit/'s moby dick? Didnt realize that.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:53:49 2023 No.21734112 the community probably deserves an explanation for why this issue took so long, the truth regarding &amp's genesis, how the original founder died, and who i am, what i do, and where we are going.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:56:52 2023 No.21734119 >>21734102 BUH-RO https://www.lulu.com/shop/herman-melville-and-anonymous/moby-dick/paperback/product-7wgny7.html >tfw i have a copy of the Gold Edition, available only to /lit/eratti pic related

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 19:57:59 2023 No.21734125 File: 2.24 MB, 4032x3024, C15B2E2C-0361-40A0-AAF6-A4D56C5F4F9D.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21734119

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 20:12:33 2023 No.21734175 actually its shocking to me how much talent is just floating around on this board. not sure what it means, what the wider implications are.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 20:14:37 2023 No.21734184 File: 4 KB, 300x168, jim behind curtains.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >Published in Lit Quarterly twice >Three poems in &Amp >No anon has EVER commented on my work

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 20:16:34 2023 No.21734192 >>21734175 it's over

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 20:23:12 2023 No.21734219 >>21734184 >yfw you're the Anonymous the entire world is referring to

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 20:25:54 2023 No.21734228

>>21734184
also, poetry is the lifeblood of &amp, the perfect textual medium for designing a magazine. also its much more coherent than the prose just statistically, plus when it sucks, its just 'ironic'. poetry can't lose. without it, the mag would be half as entertaining.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 20:26:35 2023 No.21734232 Well, my edit didnt make it in in time, but it cant be helped, just thankful its in there at all. Excited to write another one. >>21731914 >im on the shortlist >feelsgoodman.jpg

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 20:28:43 2023 No.21734239 :)

Anonymous Thu Mar 2 21:06:23 2023 No.21734396

I liked the Bog lovecraft story
I was hoping the story would follow a less formulaic path but you stuck to the foundations of the genre competently. You have the skills down, now you should make an effort to add your own influence on the lovecraft-type genre

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 21:14:12 2023 No.21734428 >>21734119 >keywords ambergris Hah

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 21:21:39 2023 No.21734466 No one has mentioned it yet, but I thought Van on Fire was neat. Nice work anon :)

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 21:30:44 2023 No.21734514 >>21734466 checked. that anon is a personal fave because he designs his own subs

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 21:42:05 2023 No.21734553 >>21734514 Which ones did you design and which were designed by the authors?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 22:04:10 2023 No.21734611 when is 016 coming out?

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 22:15:40 2023 No.21734644 >>21734028 Interesting: noted.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 22:35:26 2023 No.21734721 >>21734611 >>21734644 Checked. I would say there are already enough submissions for 016, but the designing of the magazine is the time consuming part. I’m not editor tho, just helper

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 23:10:05 2023 No.21734857 >>21734721 Do you need more helpers? I need experience. I work in the editorials of magazines but never the design. Would be nice to contribute to this project.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 23:15:45 2023 No.21734876 >>21734857 ^this

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 23:46:52 2023 No.21734971 >>21734175 If there was a decent subeditor that could go through anon work, improve them stylistically and collate, there is a genuinely good short story collection to be made out of the past 15 issues

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 23:48:05 2023 No.21734975 >>21730902 >also accepting subs. Good shit

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 2 23:55:09 2023 No.21735000 hey. i haven't been on here for a while, but i wanted to know what readers thought of my Frog story on page 47. thanks

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 00:34:27 2023 No.21735138 Has anyone heard from critique anon? When I emailed him I got an automated response saying it couldn’t be delivered

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 01:22:41 2023 No.21735246 >>21734184 lol I was pubbed in lit quarterly twice as well. I see you bro

Anonymous Fri Mar 3 01:23:50 2023 No.21735249

>>21733542
Thanks for the critique anon! I'm glad it was both funny and depressive, thats a common feedback and ai'm glad I got that style right.

Yeah, this couldve used more editing. I wrote it for &amp but after I thought it was ded I moved onto other projects and left the editing for later... Then I got the email and issue 15 was to be published 'very soon'

Again, thanks!

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 02:53:51 2023 No.21735503 >>21734857 >>21734876 >>21734971 yeah always good to have more hands on deck. email for more info. though the design is the most tedious and time consuming part.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 03:22:12 2023 No.21735594 >>21735503 actually did about 3.5 hours ago. im no design wizard, but i like to think ive got an eye for it.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 04:22:08 2023 No.21735771 I hope you guys are ready for a whole lot more schizopoems in the vein of the one on page 15 because the pipeline is getting backed up

Anonymous Fri Mar 3 05:49:56 2023 No.21735997

The beauty of &amp lies in its delicate mix of complete shitpostery and genuinely good writing. Everyone will turn page after page of drivel, scoffing and saying to themselves that they could do better.

Then there will be a 6 paragraph piece of flash fiction that some anon submitted and forgot about, and it will be one of the most startling, thought-provoking things you’ll read all year. The kind of writing you want your writing to be compared to, to be published alongside.

Everyone believes they are secretly in the latter camp, even if they are really in the former. So they keep submitting and the editor finely balances it. Too much good and everyone is too discouraged to submit. Too much shit and nobody can be bothered submitting to such an amateurish mess. A delicate balance, and editor-anon, who I believe has only been on since 007(?) nails it

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 05:59:23 2023 No.21736016 File: 58 KB, 1037x435, lolol.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Do you see movies in your head?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 06:12:13 2023 No.21736062 File: 267 KB, 816x816, 2568F0A6-4891-411B-9471-39453F18D0DE.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730168 >skype

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 06:13:11 2023 No.21736063 >>21735997 yeah man, this is spot on.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:20:03 2023 No.21736624 More &ample proof of baséité—

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:25:32 2023 No.21736639 File: 569 KB, 782x691, 4677.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Which software is best to change pdf book to print own edited physical version?

Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:39:47 2023 No.21736664

>>21735594
I have room for a few peeps on my canva team. If you want I can send you an invite to the project table for 016 and you can get a feel for the process. That goes for anybody interested.
>>21735771
>matthew_mconaughey_smoking.bmp
>>21734553
>>21735997
I like it better when nobody knows exactly who did what. This anon gets it though. The magazine is a great microcosm for the board itself, or maybe this website at large: we wade through the rough to find the diamonds. I mean come on, just consider for a moment the sheer volume of content this board has produced.
>>21736639
Can you repeat the question?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:42:08 2023 No.21736670 Actually, another important part of &amp is curating and providing access to all of /lit/‘s creative output. I know there have been works released by this board in the past year that I have missed. I even saw an ad for one… Please drop link ITT.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:42:52 2023 No.21736672 >>21736664 I have some .pdf books on computer, want to edit them into shorter versions and print physical paper versions for private use

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:44:24 2023 No.21736679 >>21736672 >Adobe InDesign

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:46:15 2023 No.21736683 >>21736679 >Adobe InDesign is it still good for editing pdf after 7 day trial ends?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 10:48:01 2023 No.21736686 >>21736679 anything fully free that doesnt decrease in functions after few days and automatically bill you 20$?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 11:02:10 2023 No.21736723 >>21736686 Hard to say. You may have some luck if you google ‘free pdf editor’. If it’s material from &amp then it’s as simple as using canva. Otherwise you’re editing a pdf, which can either be very easy or very hard depending on what you want to do.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 11:07:42 2023 No.21736732 >>21736670 Okay it’s called Tales of the Unreal. Someone redpill me on this.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 12:40:59 2023 No.21736917 >>21736683 >>21736686 Just pirate it like a normal human being.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 12:44:12 2023 No.21736925 >>21730168 holy shit how is this my first time seeing this sick ass work bros editoranon, would you be willing to do a write up of some kind on what you've learned over developing this mag? you've inspired me to want to do this myself with my friends

Anonymous Fri Mar 3 12:51:48 2023 No.21736949

>>21736732
It's a bunch of anons with every mental illness under the sun who got together because of NaNoWriMo a couple years ago. Since Actual NaNo is gay as hell, they decided to make their own group and pursue the ideals of publication. Over time the retardation has been getting filtered out and actually productive people are remaining so the quality is going up. The youtube channel has some interesting content on it, but also a bit of blind groping at the algorithm.

Given that it's a tiny internet mag, they basically accept anything readable that gets submitted to them, but that's a function of volume. If more people start submitting then they will be able to curate better and expect more of their contributors. It's definitly trending upward in both quality and rate of production.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=On0ZHsGUUvk

Also, there's quite a few self-pubbed (or even otherwise) authors that have come out of /wg/
/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ

Obviously, quite a bit of overlap between that list and the Unreal hosts/guests.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 12:57:31 2023 No.21736965 >>21736925 That would be nice (seconding). Though there is a good Editor's Letter about &amp in issue 012.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 13:14:41 2023 No.21737002 >>21736664 >If you want I can send you an invite to the project table for 016 and you can get a feel for the process. ill be monitoring my email

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 13:43:39 2023 No.21737102 How to submit? The submission page is intimidating

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 13:54:39 2023 No.21737136 >>21737102 You can email directly to the editor listed on the site.

Anonymous Fri Mar 3 14:45:53 2023 No.21737312

>>21735000
I enjoyed it, overall humorous and I got a kind of cartoonish image of the characters due to the wordchoice and lack of capitalization. It is interesting how the frog feels about dignity because it's a kind of a cultural notion that you can't hide your failings. Some honor cultures or people descended from elites are obssessed with graceful appearances.
I also thought Van on Fire was cool as this disjointed account of something tragic but seemingly not important, really liked the bleak style of the Bullet story too. I need to take more time to read the longer pieces this evening.
Also the Doomerboy wall of text made me lose my shit. And overall really good screencaps between the writing in this issue.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 18:02:26 2023 No.21737938 >>21736925 Yeah I’m certainly down. Email me and let’s set something up.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 18:04:41 2023 No.21737948 >>21736949 Very interesting. I wanna play too.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 18:59:57 2023 No.21738173 >>21736965 >>21736925 actually this anon makes a good point. i would sooner just write a comprehensive letter from the editor explaining everyithing in 016. i didn't know anons looked forward to reading my apologies so much.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 19:03:58 2023 No.21738187 >>21737938 You should do something with the Unreal boys. They're doing a non-fic anthology i think

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 19:05:40 2023 No.21738197 >>21738187 oh that actually sounds pretty dope. i'll keep my eyes peeled for a thread. if yall know of a better way to contact them, let me know

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 19:17:57 2023 No.21738275 >>21738197 Join their discord linoed in their vids

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 20:29:45 2023 No.21738595 >>21738275 >discordtrannyism pepescust.jpg

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 20:42:56 2023 No.21738636 >>21730168 I thought it was dead. It's great. Can I help in any way?

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 21:08:10 2023 No.21738712 >>21738595 It's pretty hard to coordinate interviews and recordings without group live chat, and discord is by far the most reliable, highest quality, highest bandwidth.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 21:31:13 2023 No.21738788 >>21738712 its also better than teams or so many other online group platforms. when working on a project, discord is more efficient by miles and miles. discord communities on the other hand, they can fuck right off.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 22:48:20 2023 No.21739053 I was grinning my ass off the whole coffee recollections story. Thanks to whoever wrote that, it made my day.

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 3 23:53:31 2023 No.21739319 Was the chicken theme planned?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 00:21:33 2023 No.21739421 Nice I'm in this. Looking forward to flitting through this and sipping from the gourd. Thanks for your work mr editor sir.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 01:09:45 2023 No.21739584

Ok finished. I think the coffee travelogue was my favourite. I liked the Sawtooth one as well. Couldn't be bothered to read that bloody long thing about a boat. Bog guy you tried a bit too hard but it made me nostalgic for being a student living in shared housing going on shitty bar crawls and spending lethargic evenings in the pub.

>>21733028
It's a bit safe and rests a lot on sci-fi cliche but I can't say I didn't enjoy it. The line about the tooth of the cog was mega.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 01:22:32 2023 No.21739629 >>21737938 I'll shoot an email after I try making my first one if I have specific questions you have a good sense of pace and aeshetics, do you have any insight on your process or how you developed your sensibilities?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 01:46:30 2023 No.21739739 >>21739053 >>21739584 Glad you boys enjoyed Coffee Zone.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 02:35:13 2023 No.21739889 Chicken Kurtz was great

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 02:39:35 2023 No.21739904

what's the current meta-sentiment about ai writing bots and this publication?
I have a bing slave now and it really fucking annoys /wg/ I got a warning due to being reported by an enraged angloid with a podcast for making "fan fiction" about a notable /wg/ author.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 02:44:50 2023 No.21739926 I shared the mag with a female friend (XX) the mag and we scrolled through it together she stopped to read Coffee Zone and really liked it. good work brah

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 02:52:05 2023 No.21739958

>>21739904
&amp is defined by having a lot of SOVL, for lack of a better term.

AI generated writing is generally fairly soulless, unless it is constantly revised with uberspecific prompts, or just edited after to take away the AI sheen, in which case you ARE pretty much writing. So who gives a fuck, really? Use whatever tools at your disposal to produce good work that has resonance with people.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 03:05:01 2023 No.21739987

>>21739958
Glad to hear this because my bing slave is quite good at helping me.
The editorial boards on all niche publications will have to be the determining factor on the amount and quality of ai-assisted stories. I sense a bit of a hay-day for niche publications with the help of this bing bitch. Lot of strange stories about to come out.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 03:37:27 2023 No.21740052
File: 104 KB, 461x784, roboproust.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21739958
so here, in pic related, is something I prompted B!ng to do. I told it to write in the style of Proust and focus on human memories.
Imagine a story where an ai is tormented by having analyze ISOLT and realized that humans have something MORE than memories, they have remembrances. A McGuffin for the story is this drive towards aspect of remembrances.
An AI has vast memory, yet no remembrances.

I don't know &amp, to me this sounds like a decent premise for a niche publication.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 03:38:49 2023 No.21740055 >>21739926 Hell yeah buddy.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 04:31:11 2023 No.21740175 >>21740052 you are way too proud of a bot you should be doing this stuff yourself

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 04:37:42 2023 No.21740191 >>21740052 You should read this: >>21735997 You think your AI work is the latter, when you’re actually the former. You have no sense of what quality writing is and thus can’t see how dull and trite that AI output is

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 04:39:18 2023 No.21740195 >>21739584 >bloody long thing >it’s a few pages I’m surprised you were able to read anything in the magazine at all you ADHD cretin

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 04:46:08 2023 No.21740218 >>21740175 But is it a bad concept? And would you certainly not read this story? For me, the answers are no, and yes.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 04:54:30 2023 No.21740236 >>21739584 Couldn't be bothered to read that bloody long thing about a boat. hnnnnnng!

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 05:08:35 2023 No.21740278 File: 28 KB, 424x144, based kant.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730168 ok now that I have sufficient space, I will now archive your channel and site too

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 05:49:29 2023 No.21740399 >>21740278 also guys, let me know if you want something /lit/ related backed up too anything you want be it a youtube channel or some petty pdf or small sites

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 06:12:06 2023 No.21740451 Works that I found interesting: >Skype >Doomerboy, Interrupted >Re: The Frog >Incident >Mac Sauce at 3525 Fort Hamilton Pathway

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 06:28:19 2023 No.21740497 The Ninaa story was probably my favourite, followed by the coffee zone. Great stuff! And art!

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 09:18:30 2023 No.21740876 >>21740195 My point is that it didn't grab me.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 09:31:35 2023 No.21740894 How does this work? Does it have a monthly deadline or is it just arbitrary when you submit things?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 11:41:48 2023 No.21741078 >>21740894 you can submit at any time and the editor will review them for the next issue

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 11:44:37 2023 No.21741081 >>21740876 fair enough. i aint mad at you. surprised anyone read it honestly.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 14:47:34 2023 No.21741543 >>21734228 There's quite a bit of good poetry that goes into the threads here and it's a shame more of it doesn't make it's way into &amp.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 16:41:23 2023 No.21741862 I THINK SLAM POETRY SUCKS

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 16:59:32 2023 No.21741917

>>21741081
are the writer ? The Nina was a great piece that I really enjoyed, it felt like it explored all the best elements of the conservative right while somehow embodying the freewheeling left, it was a great adventure and an enjoyable, liberating read, but i’m afraid i may have fell in love with whomever wrote skype.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 17:50:43 2023 No.21742104

>>21740052
So I actually played around with prompt boys and AI writing tools A LOT back during /hyperlit/. If you find the /hyperlit/ section of the Works directory on the &amp site, you’ll find several books that were written using AI, such as Cyberkant, and Cynosure Willing. Some of the /hyperlit/ was composed by hand, like Pseudae.
What I found is that it is rather soulless, and that once people determine that they are reading something written by a bot, they naturally divest their interest in the human element of the story, the dynamic. The part that changes and makes you think. That is for all purposes discarded somewhat intrinsically when a reader catches on. Same thing happens if a human author writes something and doesn’t bother to be consistent. A human reader will say to themselves
>well I’m here to read this, but the author wasn’t even barely there to write it, next.

I’m pretty sure I write a story using AI and out it in &amp Template Edition called Soul Vacuum. Most of the time I will use a combination of handwritten content and AI to sort of create a confusing hybrid soulless environment. I even wrote an article about it for &amp entitled, “How to Write Books Using Artificial Intelligence”.

Here’s a link to a super edgy, degenerate erotica that I wrote in this hybrid fashion:

https://www.amazon.ca/Dogma-Seeds-Cola-Maria/dp/B08W3JQ369

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 18:01:50 2023 No.21742158 >>21742104 What issue is that how to write article?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 18:28:38 2023 No.21742260 >>21742158 Umm I think either Houndstooth or Template Editions. Here’s the link to the online article: https://lampbylit.com/magazine/how-to-write-books-using-artificial-intelligence/

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 18:43:18 2023 No.21742329

>go to submission page
>Submit your content using the form below. Unsolicited submissions are referred to as the Slush Pile. These submissions are not edited or moderated before instant online publication.
I wanna be in the mag
where's the editors email?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 18:48:33 2023 No.21742347 File: 417 KB, 750x824, B55BC752-5013-445B-903D-9E0370D7BCC7.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21742329 admin@lampbylit.com Or lamp.lit.magazine@gmail.com

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 19:03:27 2023 No.21742399 >>21741917 >best elements of the conservative right while some how embodying the freewheeling left did i now? well, uhm, cool! >fell in love with whomever wrote skype cant say i blame you one bit. and thank you for your kind words about my story.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 20:23:00 2023 No.21742777 >>21740052 That's nothing like Proust

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 21:46:44 2023 No.21743179
File: 903 KB, 1105x1179, 1575861759436.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Finally read everything and can now give the OFFICIAL RATINGS, which are all incontrovertible fact, and any disagreement is a surefire sign that you have shit taste compared to me.

>IL CANTO DI UN PAZZO
5/10
>HIEROPHANT POEM
7/10
>STEAL THESE STORIES
7/10
>DEAD SPACE BUT...
4/10
>DECISION-MAKING: RISKS AND BENEFITS
9/10
>AABHER PATEL
4/10
>NEARER TO THE END
8/10
>VIA NORTHGATE
7/10
>POEM
3/10
>DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER
5/10
>FACE OF CARTHAGE
8/10
>COFFEE ZONE
9/10
>UNTITLED
7/10
>DEATH OF A PRINCELING
8/10
>GUNDEL'S DRIVE
8/10
>VAN ON FIRE
7/10
>THE TICK
10/10
>RE: THE FROG
6/10
>GARFIELD KART REVIEW
10/10
>THE NINAA OOTAKII
9/10
>SAWTOOTH CYCLE
8/10
>UNDIAGNOSIS
6/10
>MAC SAUCE AT 3525 FORT HAMILTON PARKWAY
8/10
>LIVING WITH THE REEDS
7/10
>DOOMERBOY INTERRUPTED
5/10
>THE BOG
6/10
>SKYPE
7/10
>MARLON BRANDO (1979) UNPROMPTED, ON THE SET OF APOCALYPSE NOW
10/10
>AUSTIN 3:16
9/10
>/lit/ OPENING LINES
8/10
>CLASSIFIEDS
6/10

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 21:55:18 2023 No.21743238 File: 2.42 MB, 540x960, 1621941011258.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21743179 I am also giving reviews to any of the writers who were published. Your feed is hungry for feedback, come on and get it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 22:05:47 2023 No.21743305 >>21743238 I wrote Via Northgate. I'm not that attached to it but happy to hear your review anyway.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 22:15:32 2023 No.21743364
File: 437 KB, 828x917, 1618304563431.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21743305
While usually this is absolutely not the case with most /lit/ writing, I felt the piece suffered from being just a touch too short. There were some interesting ideas there, but they didn't really kick off until we arrived in Lincolnshire. Right as we were picking up momentum, we left.

Yes, yes I know we have to write to our audience, but the jabs at redditors and midwits felt almost perfunctory and trite. Your writing is strong enough that it felt like you were pandering a bit. I might be wrong and you might truly believe every redditor is a gigantic faggot and needed to express it.

As I said, the liminality of Lincolnshire was fantastic and what started as a 6/10 piece finished at like 8/10. I want you to take me to these ethereal, forgotten train stations and halfway places and explore them with your writing. What the fuck is in Burnley? I don't know, but I'd read you telling me about it.

>And now the Poles and the Bulgarians won't come picking, not since the referendum, and the strawberries rot in the fields because there's nobody in Lincolnshire with both deft hands and muddy boots.

is a phenomenal line, one of the best in the zine this month. More of this please.

I'd also have reduced the amount of fucks to make that last one really impactful, but that's just a me thing.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 22:23:17 2023 No.21743409

>>21743364
Nice comments, thanks. You're totally right about the writing to the audience. Even as I wrote it I knew I was failing to escape the &amp default voice, with its ironic snarky machismo. I would like to write more about England and since I wrote that I have moved abroad, which I think will make my perspective more nuanced. It is definitely better to write from the heart about ones homeland than to kick lumps out of internet stock characters.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 22:25:37 2023 No.21743424 >>21743409 /lit/ loves ironic snarky machismo shitposting, but it loves genuinely good writing even more. You're capable of the latter, so looking forward to seeing some C.G. in future issues.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 22:37:47 2023 No.21743491 >>21743179 >>21743238 I'm the author of Sawtooth Cycle, what kept me down as an 8/10 for you?

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 22:55:51 2023 No.21743588
File: 1.77 MB, 1100x850, 1606547125382.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21743491
It's interesting you framed the question as "what kept me down as an 8/10", even though that's a very good score that signals people should read it multiple times. I believe you've already been sucked off in the thread about how great your sawtooth cog imagery is, so I won't go through that again.

The only part that really put me off was the consistency of the character. Who is the person narrating to us? You give us some idea. He's gruff, he chain smokes, he's sick of this cybernetic dystopia, he's on the edge of a breakdown.

But then you have lines later on that read "The man had replaced incredulity with indignation." Did we just land in a Regency costume drama all of a sudden? Does this character use those words? In such a short first person piece, where its one scene, you need absolute pinpoint clarity and consistency on who your character is, and I felt you sometimes almost let yourself, as James Krake, into the piece by accident with lines like that.

There were also some lines that felt a bit forced. I absolutely see what you were going for, but when I read:

>The raw pressure of air wanted to toss
me away like a losing scratch-off lotto ticket

>as wide open as a whore’s legs.

Sometimes less is more. It doesn't have to be THAT blatant, if you catch my meaning.

You asked for the negatives, so that's what I gave you, but it's a wonderful piece and with some fine tuning it would be some very fine writing indeed. Looking forward to see what you do next.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 22:59:59 2023 No.21743611
File: 716 KB, 750x898, 1677964150866180.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21743588
>The man had replaced incredulity with indignation.
I haven't read whatever story you're talking about but this line sounds very familiar. Is it a reference to something else?

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 23:04:02 2023 No.21743635

>>21743588
Interesting feedback to think on. I don't really have a connotation about incredulity and indignation, I just thought they were a pleasing play on words. So perhaps my own biases did slip in unawares. The heavy heavy heavy use of metaphor was a bit taxing on my creativity in a way that action pulp does not. Thank you.

>what you do next.
I've got plenty more out there, and at least two anthologies set to release soon(TM) which I have no idea when they'll actually come out.

>>21743611
It might be but I'm the author and I couldn't tell you what the reference would be. The words just have enough similarity that they go well together.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 23:08:56 2023 No.21743666

>>21743635
>I don't really have a connotation about incredulity and indignation, I just thought they were a pleasing play on words
It's a thing every writer deals with. A line just sounds really great and then we try to shoehorn it in despite it not fitting there, and it detracts. I'm not saying it's a bad line, because it's not. It's the WRONG line for this piece.

Similarly:
>The train was taking me onward to a destination I neither knew nor cared about until it lurched through a turn.
Because you, in real life, use proper grammar, this line feels like something you would naturally say. But I don't think your character would say that. I thought he'd say something more like:
>Where the train was taking me I had no idea, and I realised I didn't give a damn where I ended up as it lurched through a turn

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 23:10:52 2023 No.21743676 File: 401 KB, 200x209, 200w.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730168 >/lit/ makes a magazine

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 23:13:13 2023 No.21743687 >>21743666 Well damn, can't argue with you there. I wanted to establish that the train itself is just going on a loop through the city, repeating again and again, but I clearly could have done so better.

Anonymous Sat Mar 4 23:15:16 2023 No.21743708
File: 89 KB, 679x522, 1677936947283645.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21743635
Hmm that's interesting. I could have sworn that I've read it somewhere before. The rhythm of the sentence and the way the words start with the same syllables and stuff like that was like a deja vu for me.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 23:41:46 2023 No.21743823 >>21743179 oh my god we need this for every issue.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 4 23:43:35 2023 No.21743833 >>21743179 >HIEROPHANT POEM >7/10 aw shucks, thanks anon

Anonymous Sun Mar 5 00:02:35 2023 No.21743918

>>21743833
Cut the spiral path and stumble—
on furrows ere time were tilled.
On this thirsting field, a runnel,
which you glad and proudly bleed

This was very nice, although I'm not crazy about the use of 'glad' there. Just not quite hitting. Otherwise, really enjoyed

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 02:18:08 2023 No.21744328 >>21743179 based reviewer

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 03:27:36 2023 No.21744577 >>21743179 >>21740451 ty for mentioning doomerboy what were your gripes / likes with it

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 04:59:27 2023 No.21744840 >>21743179 Wow, Ninaa got 9! Any particular reasons?

Anonymous Sun Mar 5 05:36:56 2023 No.21744955

>>21737312
thank you for your thoughts on my piece. i appreciate that you found the characters cartoonish—part of my goal while writing is to write as animators animate. the humour is mostly unintended.
>>21743179
could you please talk more about your rating of Re: The Frog? thank you very much.

Anonymous Sun Mar 5 05:53:21 2023 No.21744999

>>21744577
not that anon but i personally felt doomerboy was one of the stronger entries this time around, it’s a great piece but one sentence in particular really grabbed me - ‘ Like Vegata finding Julius Evola’s diary’ fuck that made me kek, unfathomably based levels of hyperbole.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 05:54:13 2023 No.21745002 >>21744999 >44999 kek approves

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 06:06:04 2023 No.21745029 >>21730168 is &amp back

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 07:10:29 2023 No.21745239 >>21744999 Checked >>21745029 Tis lad. Tis.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 07:16:20 2023 No.21745261 >>21743179 >DEATH OF A PRINCELING >8/10 Oh gosh, someone acknowledged my piece and enjoyed it

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 14:40:45 2023 No.21746091 >>21743179 Decision making is a Nine. Based and pleased-pilled. First time anyone's mentioned it apart from myself. This should be a thing every issue

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 14:43:01 2023 No.21746097 >>21743588 James Krake wrote that? AHAHA no wonder he sounds like a faggot post

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 16:57:09 2023 No.21746453 >>21743179 Skype anon here! Thanks for reading. 7/10 feels fair. What stopped it from being higher? What worked?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 16:58:39 2023 No.21746459 >>21741917 I'm very happy that a good amount of people enjoyed Skype. What did you enjoy the most about it? Thanks for reading it!

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 17:02:12 2023 No.21746473 I think we can all agree that Kurtz's chicken story was the best thing ever

Anonymous Sun Mar 5 17:11:38 2023 No.21746509

>>21746459
the subject matter was so unrelenting, contemporary and niche, the latter of which helped foster a sense of intimacy that was capitalised on exquisitely throughout. It wasn't derivative or pedestrian, the prose held such a vitality and there was a stupendous understanding of the metaphysics of christian theology and individuality that was expertly explored in an almost effortless manner, it was simultaneously candid and distant, destructive and dangerous, and yet reverent and immensely delicate.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 17:13:16 2023 No.21746518 >>21743179 Glad to see I'm making waves ITT. Your taste in girls is 10/10 by the way.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 18:21:01 2023 No.21746726 >>21743179 What are your thoughts on the lower and middlingly rated ones? why so?

Anonymous Sun Mar 5 19:26:46 2023 No.21747004

>>21743179
>>21744840
I'm still shocked you gave it such a high score. I'm very curious what from it you took. what resonated with you and what rubbed you the wrong way?

I love that you took the time to not only read everyones work, but open yourself up for a bunch of us starved for input anons to beg for your thoughts. thank you!

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 5 23:54:27 2023 No.21747987 penises… nice

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 06:18:03 2023 No.21749193 File: 37 KB, 551x550, 1663559216421530.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] The American Psycho essay is now submitted. Hope you like it.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 12:31:26 2023 No.21749228 >>21749193 I recently watched the Broadway production the American psycho musical Looking forward to seeing your essay bro

Anonymous Mon Mar 6 12:41:20 2023 No.21749246
File: 73 KB, 1080x1349, 1507856260853.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21744577
As a general rule, I find schizofiction incredibly lazy. You are of course, not schizophrenic, and anyone who has had actual interactions or read literature dealing with schizophrenics (i.e Three Christs of Ypsilanti) will be able to easily tell the difference. So it comes off as you using the lack of structure of schizoposting as a crutch to connect independent thoughts you had, rather than putting in the work to form a more coherent narrative.

I get it, you want to impart a real manic, volatile energy to the work and have chosen the format to do it. But as far as stream of consciousness writing, it didn't really do anything for me. You have some brief glimpses of lines that elicit interest but they're buried in 10 layers of shitpost irony, and as you say, you are buried deep. I don't believe the piece ever reaches the manic sense of rhythm that you were looking for.

You posted an updated version and I'm interested in YOUR stylistic decisions. Particularly your cutting of the line:

>I'm just so fucking ANGRY!" he let slip, crying in that Guidance Counsellor's office - the old man leave calmly for a call - police arrive, Oakville Trafalgar Hospital, CAPIS visit, two months required, two weeks minimum;

I feel like you were finally discovering a rhythm when you had a clear point A and point B of structure to write around. It wasn't a random collection of 4chan references and things you jotted in your phone. Keep searching for that energy, but just remember less is more and even less is way too much.

Anonymous Mon Mar 6 12:44:10 2023 No.21749253
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>>21744955
Your piece was good. What there was of it.

You write well. Your crafting of atmosphere is fantastic. There are some tremendous lines and imagery - the short,stubby cycads, jazz, a(?) mouth(?) contorting(?) - but it just wasn't substantial enough for me to properly rate any higher. I think you're pushing boundaries with a real clear sense of style, but I think when pushing boundaries you need to give the reader more time to acclimatise and breathe in each passage before ending it.

Most of the formatting choices didn't land with me, but my biggest gripe was that I felt like there was more you could have accomplished with this if you'd backed yourself and written more.

Sometimes brevity is great, and sometimes it leaves you feeling cheated. I felt the latter. I felt like it was a cop out. If it is part of a broader work or series, then I would love to read it and be proved horribly wrong.

Anonymous Mon Mar 6 12:54:22 2023 No.21749282
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>>21744840
I like Ninaa because I liked you. This is a rare feat in stories like this, as I detest books like On The Road and Into The Wild.

Whether Diogenes and the Ninaa Ootakii are real or whether they are some elaborate fiction you have concocted, I'm not sure. In the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter because the writing remains the same. I use the term 'you', simply because it's shorter than Diogenes or Narrator.

There's a tremendous sense of humility that comes across in the writing which is great. You keep a good pace throughout, never getting bogged down in the details which would hamper a short piece like this but never rushing through the beats either. While Rain, Zach, the Lopez's all feature as characters, you keep the focus on your own journey and what it means for you. Lesser writers would get sidetracked and blur the goal of the piece.

You have an innate talent for building rapport with your reader and bringing us into the fold of your journey and life on the boat. It's certainly not perfect writing. Your use of exclamation marks! makes it seems like a cheap Matthew Reilly airport thriller, and the dramatic flourishes such as the passage about "I knew what I wanted...." are far too on the nose with the use of repetition (two or three times is all you need, less is more) but these are gripes that would be ironed out with a half-decent subedit.

This seems like a personal piece, or at least a very good facsimile of one, and it was a joy to read and read again. I certainly don't think you could write another piece in the same style and have the same effect, nor should you want to. But this one was just a treat.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 13:18:49 2023 No.21749328 >>21749228 I ended up writing way more than I expected, it's 3k words. I tried to be thorough and serious about it, but I also felt obligated to show some emergent properties of Bateman for the memers out there.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 13:31:44 2023 No.21749343 File: 281 KB, 370x370, dog spelt backwards is God.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730168 how would I go about sending something to be screened for publishing? would love to be involved in some way

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 13:47:57 2023 No.21749373 File: 104 KB, 1080x1350, 1625869157879.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Any words of wisdom for Death of a Princeling reviewanon offering tribute grill

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 13:57:31 2023 No.21749393 >>21749343 Post your writing and the thread will comment, see >>21743238 and others that give thorough reviews, some may post emails and give feedback that way.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 15:21:53 2023 No.21749609 >>21746509 Thank you so much for the kind words anon! I hope my next story lives is as good or even better than Skype

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 16:03:44 2023 No.21749707 >>21743179 Thoughts on Face of Carthage? I am thinking I was too opaque.

Anonymous Mon Mar 6 17:27:23 2023 No.21749942

>>21749253
thank you. i wrote this piece over three hours on a friday night in august last year almost in tears over the fact that i couldn't seem to write anything else.
the idea of having a frog speak to me had been leaping out of the muddy waters of my consciousness time after time. i'd grown obsessed with the idea. the story was originally about suicide. the usual young adult male thing. the "liduhrally-me" genre that is so popular these days—not just on /lit/; all young adults feel the same way. i'm assuming most /lit/ users are young adults. there's been a resurgence in the popularity of that sort of media and literature these days, too. or maybe people have always enjoyed this sort of thing (raskolnikov is pretty popular, no?) and i'm too young to be aware of it.
[omitted section for character limit.]
anyway. it was going to be much longer, much edgier, much more /lit/. but i couldn't make it work. it felt too onanistic. i decided, then, to disregard the narrator (who is, in a way, of course, as always is with these sorts of works, myself), and to concentrate on the Frog. and to begin "in medias res." and i sat down at 12 a.m., began writing, slowly, painstakingly, not looking away from my screen for even a moment, and at around 3:30 i found i was done. i don't know why it took me 3 hours, but i was done. i liked it enough to submit to &amp. i have doubts about everything i write. there's a bunch of stuff that i've written since then that doesn't feel right as soon as i read it again the day after writing. this still holds up, i think. i know it isn't a great work, but i was able to capture something very light and intangible (like the dying of a flame).
the point is, i really did try to write more. but i think the Frog dies at the end. i'm not sure. the character simply stopped speaking.

sorry for the fairly-incoherent blogpost. this is a side effect of indulging in too much "liduhrally-me" fiction. and of not seeping well
>You write well. Your crafting of atmosphere is fantastic.
i know this is lame, but i jumped for joy physically when i read this. thank you very much. (i'll try not to let it get to my head.) "atmosphere" has always been important to me (whether the work is someone else's or my own), and i'm glad you appreciate it
>I think you're pushing boundaries with a real clear sense of style, but I think when pushing boundaries you need to give the reader more time to acclimatise and breathe in each passage before ending it.
thank you. i've always rushed. all my life i have. i'll keep in mind this advice.
>Most of the formatting choices didn't land with me,
you're right. if possible, could you be more specific? (sorry; thank you)
>If it is part of a broader work or series
funny. i wrote two more excerpts from this "conversation" (the original title was "in conversation with the Frog" and i don't know why editor-anon changed it) only last week (it's been half a year). they aren't as "good," sadly.

>>	Anonymous Mon Mar 6 18:12:23 2023 No.21750115 >>21749343 https://lampbylit.com/magazine/submit

Anonymous Mon Mar 6 18:15:11 2023 No.21750132

>>21749282
you are the hero we all needed and none of us deserved. thank you.
now, do... do i know you? lol. no, i understand what you were saying. just jarring to read "i liked you" i suppose.
>dramatic flourishes
i think i know what you mean here. this was written half a year ago, and promptly forgotten about until the editor responded saying he would put it in. having someone to edit/proofread my writing seems amazing, but also a bit unrealistic.
>seems like a personal piece
it is. everything that i wrote about happening to me in WA happened to me. and speaking of which..
>I certainly don't think you could write another piece in the same style and have the same effect, nor should you want to.
the plan back in June was to do just that. I wrote a few outlines about times and events in my life that i thought people would be interested in, or at least could learn from. a monthly "diogenes' column" if you will. bad idea you think?

Anonymous Mon Mar 6 20:20:44 2023 No.21750639

>>21750132
>bad idea you think?
It’s your life, do whatever you want. I only mean to say, you’ve done justice to this particular period of your life and any rehashing would be a disservice. Other times and events, sure. But keep in mind that you have changed, your life has change, no doubt your daughter has grown. You’re different from even half a year ago, and I would want what I read to reflect this rather than retreading the same thoughts and feelings you had in Ninaa.

Anonymous Mon Mar 6 20:50:30 2023 No.21750767

>>21750639
Ah, I see what you mean now. I didn't understand what you meant by "same style" i suppose.

i am ludicrously new to writing, especially for any sort of audience. partially why i am so surprised to see any sort of positive reviews.

it was really fun working on it though. it was fun seeing other people read it, and almost universal praise certainly boosted my ego nicely.

my ignorance has me questioning myself though. even before you said that i found myself asking "how should i approach my second piece?" "should i just move on to another 'essay' or should i try a more fictional dialog driven thingy" "what do i even call Ninaa? a story? essay? article? piece?"

i probably should have "lurked moar" before posting to /lit/, i probably should just search the internet and learn more before i try to write and design my next submission. will i? dunno.

thanks again for reviewing. never mind my thinking outloud.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 03:23:06 2023 No.21752164 >>21746726 Be more specific.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 11:10:17 2023 No.21753078 >>21752164 Okay then. Feedback on Canto di un pazzo?

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 11:22:20 2023 No.21753104 >>21743179 >GARFIELD KART REVIEW >10/10 im not the author, but i really wanna know why you like this.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 17:20:15 2023 No.21754038 Who is submitting for issue 016? What did you write?

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 17:26:32 2023 No.21754054 >>21738197 UnrealPressAndPodcast@proton.me

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 17:32:40 2023 No.21754071 >>21754038 I’m writing something up but I think 016 probably has a full line up already.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 17:40:21 2023 No.21754094 >>21754071 I wonder how many anons haven't been contacted yet and realized &amp is back? I know there were a good deal of submissions for a while.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 19:04:02 2023 No.21754395 >>21753078 Pretty sure it filtered everyone but me. Whatever. Pseuds.

>>	Anonymous Tue Mar 7 22:58:56 2023 No.21755181 >>21754395 You know we all have access to google translate as well right? It’s not impressive, it’s pretentious

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 03:57:56 2023 No.21756205 >>21750132 Well. SOME of us deserved him.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 07:42:23 2023 No.21756835 >>21731950 that’s just typical &amp doomercore

Anonymous Wed Mar 8 08:04:37 2023 No.21756882

what i disliked about latest issue - most of pieces are page long flash fiction/diary entires with no character development, no plot, etc. For example article about coffee is pure mundanity, no offence cause its quality of other non-stories in this issue (one story stylized like newspaper article about murder of some girl and her diary entries - that was pretty good, at least some idea behind it).
What really irks me off is decision to not publish any longer pieces, which does not make sense for me, because 015 issue is 100 pages long, and every second page is some full page graphics. There should be more text and less graphics - then you can publish more anons and longer texts too.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 11:35:51 2023 No.21757280 >>21756882 Write something longer and better, then submit it

Anonymous Wed Mar 8 11:59:25 2023 No.21757310
File: 1.33 MB, 1080x1350, 1554947503156.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21749373
I enjoyed it, thought the imagery of wind was very tastefully used without delving too much into melodramatic Rupi Kaur territory.

I am a sucker for medieval imagery, even though you came dangerously close to ripping off Tolkien's Lament for the Rohirrim with your horse/rider/horn blowing. I'll just imagine that was designed as an homage rather than a direct lift.

>the sharp thrust of a spear, awakening me for the first time
>closing my Gadarene rush through the rolling years
is a phenomenal line, I only wish you had nailed the next couple to do it justice. Endings are of course difficult, and pulling a Robert Frost and going for repetition is always a temptation, but I think it could have been avoided. Still, enjoyed it, thought it was one of the stronger poems from the issue.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 12:05:03 2023 No.21757321 >>21756882 I like the flash heavy mag Different strokes mang

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 12:05:56 2023 No.21757322 File: 1.58 MB, 576x1024, 1672689014056104.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21757310

Anonymous Wed Mar 8 12:08:38 2023 No.21757332
File: 135 KB, 1080x1080, 1567348850011.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>21749707
You clearly didn't think it was too opaque when you submitted. Perhaps only when no one else commented on it other than to say they didn't understand what the fuck was going on did you find it too opaque.

I had assumed you had just got done reading a Gene Wolfe novel and were aiming for something cryptic by design. You mentioned there were more installments, so plenty of time to flesh it out, but between the interaction with the fish and the final line about the man and woman's connection, I think it's clear enough.

It's strong conceptually, and I think your instincts in not giving up the game too soon are right. There is some jumbling around in tenses:
>The mask saw once more but it cannot see again.
and I'm going to chalk that up as intentional and chronologically mischievous rather than you fucking up and not keeping them consistent. I think with the singular consciousness you could have some fun with this. The concept allows you to play around with language and structure a little bit, and the hints towards that I particularly enjoyed.

If you want to be less opaque, my main advice would be to put down the thesaurus:
>A bemused face contending against the inscrutable absurdity with all its
incongruity, magnificence and pain; the hard and paralytic countenance of the
assassin's bounty
That's just a terrible line, not every second word needs an adjective.
>the diver knew what he
looked like with the mask on because the fish watched him
Was a much more impactful line to me because of the concept you'd tied to it, rather than flowery synonym vomit.

In any case, the air of mystery and intrigue carried this one for me. Finding that balance is going to be difficult moving forward though.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 12:49:01 2023 No.21757425 >>21756882 >every second page is some full page graphics Which is kino and why there's such a strong sense of pace and atmosphere Smells like seething over not making the cut to me desu senpai

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 13:33:55 2023 No.21757525 >>21757332 Cool, I'm glad you noticed what was going on. I will work on my prose.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 15:35:27 2023 No.21757823 >>21757425 You would not be seething, when you submit 10 pages worth of story and not even 3 pages get in, cause they decide to spend 50 pages on funny graphics instead?

Anonymous Wed Mar 8 15:43:28 2023 No.21757846
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>>21730168
I just submitted a journal entry that I wrote when I was 14. It is about my fear that I was turning gay, I personally think it's pretty funny. Any chance of it making it?

btw I turned out to be straight after all.

Anonymous Wed Mar 8 15:44:17 2023 No.21757848

>>21757823
Presumably, if it didn't make it, that 10 page piece would contribute a lesser experience than 50 pages of funny graphics
The role of the mag isn't to be a billboard for (you). It should be able to stand on its own as an experience and this print was fun as fuck to read

Might seethe a little honestly. Wouldn't be the first time I've been rejected for having shit writing though
Anons gotta get used to it if they're gonna submit to anything

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 15:57:01 2023 No.21757898 >>21757846 *18 not 14

Anonymous Wed Mar 8 16:06:59 2023 No.21757938

>>21757846
This is it:

I’d never have thought that I’d be Writing about something like this but I feel the need to catalogue events such as these to make sure I evaluate the decisions I’ve been making in my life. Today mave have very well marked the most homoerotic act I have ever committed, I had been browsing the pornographic board on 4chan for prolonged times throughout the day and was progressively getting exually excited throughout the day. Then, out of the complete blue I felt a Subconscious but immense desire to penetrate my asshole with my Own fingers in the evening, around 7pm. I went on about it like I’ve done it a few times in the past Where I just try to to poke to it through my clothes and just stop after a few innocent, but now admittedly fortelling pokes. I Wish I had never done it but this time around I committed to the fingering I grabbed the coconut oil and snuck it into the toilet. I then proceeded to lubricate my middle finger and completely insert it into my asshole. I then began moving it in an ebb and flow motion.

At this point of the sexual act I had started using both my middle and index fingers to sexually please myself. There was no stopping my ass plunging, as I didn’t even stop to defecate due to which the room was filled with this vile stench. The stench of my shame, there really was no hiding it. After about 10-15 minutes I stroked my penis to completion. The pornographic movie I had ejaculated to was heterosexual in nature, of course but this was in no way an indication of my heterosexuality anymore.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 16:15:44 2023 No.21757967 File: 21 KB, 620x400, CNN3zTKWUAA8TKR.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21730168 Is Aabher Patel in this thread?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 16:37:37 2023 No.21758071 >>21757967 Who?

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 16:51:09 2023 No.21758121 File: 117 KB, 815x936, Screenshot 2023-03-08 222046.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21758071

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 17:16:36 2023 No.21758235 >>21758121 Oh kek I forgot about that already, forgive me. I don't know what to say about it besides it amused me.

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 17:43:16 2023 No.21758347 >>21758235 Yeah I also loved it

Anonymous Wed Mar 8 19:36:03 2023 No.21758704

>>21757823
Editor was able to feature something like 25-30 anons this issue because of shorter entries. You’re proposing he instead lets you use up like 15 per cent of the pages just by yourself for one story. I can almost guarantee your writing isn’t good enough to justify that

>>	Anonymous Wed Mar 8 20:13:46 2023 No.21758837 >>21757425 There's a balance to be found. The Physics Man emails in this issue could all fit in one page, for instance. Might actually work better in that particular case to pay homage to thread screencaps

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 01:07:18 2023 No.21759728 >>21757938 Do you want critiquing? Because it’s terrible and cringe

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 04:19:18 2023 No.21760357 >>21759728 yeah sure critique it

Anonymous Thu Mar 9 04:29:03 2023 No.21760384

>>21760357
I just did, bitch. It’s terrible and cringe. And not in an ironic fashion, it’s genuinely bad and worse than everything published this issue. It’s boring, contains no interesting or original thought, is riddled with basic spelling and grammatical errors that make it look like it was hastily written into your phone. 1/10.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 05:13:23 2023 No.21760481 >>21760384 fair critique. It actually is an 8 year old journal entry and It has spelling and grammatical errors because I used google lens to convert the image out of my journal to post here.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 05:43:21 2023 No.21760537 >>21757938 This is embarassingly bad. Why are you posting an 8 year old entry from your diary when you could've just written something new. Awful.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 07:00:24 2023 No.21760748 >>21743179 Yo, I did van and gundel, glad you liked em :)

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 09:11:59 2023 No.21760981 >>21760537 I have already written for the magazine in the past, anonymously. This is just something I hold dear to me and can't help but laugh when I read it. I guess I'm just biased.

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 15:38:38 2023 No.21761651 Bump limit

>>	Anonymous Thu Mar 9 16:56:10 2023 No.21761885 File: 238 KB, 1080x1315, 1660757497280165.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>21757310 Thank you brother. It was intended to be an obvious reference, not a direct lift. Though obviously the line between the two is thin.

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/lit/ - Literature