/lit/ - Literature

Wizard of Oz
Harry Potter
Coraline
How To Train Your Dragon
Alice in Wonderland
and then explain all of them in historical and contextual detail to make them fall asleep.

>>941304
>Harry Potter
>explain all of them in historical and contextual detail
Is there anything to explain at all?
Oz and Alice do have of course and I didn't read or watch neither Coraline and train so I don't know if there is something to explain there.

>>941316
>didn't read NOR watch
but no elephants
milk and cookies
bob and shirley

>>941304
>All fantasy

Fuck you.

>>941318

Romance of the Three Kingdoms

>>941319
>based on a true story.

I didn't know anthropomorphic lobsters existed.

>>941317
Touché, did not know that...although Fantasy is more LotR than Wizard of Oz
Also
Goodnight Moon

Don Quixote

>>941325
thats because you had a shit childhood and didn't borrow bob and shirley from the local library every week.

the decline and fall of the roman empire

120 Days Of Sodom

>>941389
this - every evening another Five Stories, - but especially the Book "Philosophy in the Boudoir" to my Daughter

1001 nights

Any book that's not about a spoiled princess.

The Lord of the Rings of course.

The Bible.

Harry Potter, The Little Prince, The Wizard of Oz, Princess Bride, Coraline, Stardust, Alice in Wonderland, Lord of the Rings, Treasure Island, Little Women, Narnia, Grimm Brothers, Hans Christian Anderson, Beatrix Potter, From the Mixed Up Files of Ms. Basil E. Frankwheiler, The Giver, Heidi, different mythologies from around the world.

pretty much anything and everything. I really hope my kids like stories and reading as much as I do.

>>941820

Your kids will grow up to tell their teachers "Reading is stupid!"

>>941825

probably. bleh.

Alice in Wonderland or The Wizard of Oz while Pink Floyd is playing.
Guaranteed awesome life in progress.

>>941837

They will also love Twilight.

American Psycho. Every single night.

>>941820

nothing of this, except Alice in Wonderland and LOTR

i'd get them to do maths and teh science first. then obviously i would indoctrinate them with the communist manifesto

Robinson Crusoe
Alice in Wonderland
Wizard of Oz
The Hobbit
Treasure Island
Little House on the Prairie et al
etc.

Same books my momma read me (thanks mom <3).

>>941854

I would smother them in their sleep

>>941885

They will look down at you as you read one of your favorites, "Dad, I've gotten really into classic literature lately." You'll stare up them as they finish that sentence, a glitter in your eye. A glitter in theirs as well as they believe you are finally proud of them.

"Really? What book are you reading?" You ask them. The next word crushes your soul.

"Twilight!"

>>941891
You shouldn't have children if it takes them reading classic literature for you to be proud.

nothing ... I am against reproduction.

>>941884
>The Hobbit

Good man, this one. Knows a real childrens book when he sees it. That will certainly be on my list, along with the Rod Albright Alien Adventures series, Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn. Oh, and as many Achient Myth stories as I can find. The REAL myths, like the Herculean Labors, The Norse Myths, The Táin Bó Cuailnge, and not that watered down Disney nonsense.

>>941934
>against reproduction

Depends if it is a son or a daughter.
I wouldn't read my son anything. I'd go hunting, sailing and fishing with him. I'd often go camping with him too, training him to survive in the nature. Maybe telling him a nordic, indian or japanese tale about nature spirits before sleeping but the goal is that he is to sleepy to need a story told before sleeping. I want him to be what I wasn't as a child, he has enough time reading when he is a teen and I can't form him to a strong man anymore.
I wouldn't read a girl anything too, the mother would and I'd never tell her which book she should read to our daughter, I'll probably fearing my wife.

>>941990
>I'd go hunting, sailing and fishing with him. I'd often go camping with him too, training him to survive in the nature. Maybe telling him a nordic, indian or japanese tale about nature spirits before sleeping but the goal is that he is to sleepy to need a story told before sleeping.

why don't you just buy him an xbox
surely he'll get more enjoyment out of that

and this goes for all of you
what makes you think your kids will want you to read to them
what even makes you think you're going to have kids

>>941995

this

>>942001
>>941995
>>941985

You made me sage this thread.

>>941293
>what even makes you think you're going to have kids?
simple my good man: genetic imperative.

Suess
Sherlock Holmes
Edith Hamilton's greek mythology
Folk tales
1001 nights

>>941995

Not the guy you're responding to but I won't be buying my kids any sort of console. We'll have a computer but not many games and I will limit their time with any games we do have. We'll have a TV but only the most basic of cable (20 channels) just so I can watch the news and they can watch The Simpsons or whatever.

And of course we'll watch movies/dvds of good shows.

>>942023
what if they wanted a console
what if it would make them happy

>>942001

>what makes you think your kids will want you to read to them

You start reading to them when they're 1-2 years old before bed and it becomes a routine. That's how my parents got me into it at least. Then you keep reading to them every night until they can read on their own.

>>942020
damn, its been a while. how could i have forgotten about Suess? That will definitely be on the list, for when they are still very young.

>>942031

what if they wanted crack cocaine
what if it would make them happy

>>941995
He is not supposed to enjoy it, he is supposed to learn something practical. If he enjoys it that's good to but that's not the main goal. I hate theorist who can't do anything in practice. Goes hand in hand with my self-hatred.

games melt kids mindsss

no silly xbox for you. if you must get a console, get a ds or something.

>>942041
unless your son becomes a sailor or a hunter those things don't have practical use
seriously just teach him calculus or something
math is practical

>>942053
>implying stagolee knows calculus

i don't know calculus but i'm going to say after reading a brief history of time it seems more useful today than fucking camping

>>942064
calculus is easy.. go learn it

Stagolee's going to raise a spoiled-ass kid.

>>942053
Please be a troll.

>>942053

It's not about practical use, I doubt my kid will ever need to build a fire by himself in the woods, but it builds character, and as a dad that's all the reason you need to do anything.

>>942042
Oy, be reasonable now. I grew up with The Hobbit in one hand and an NES controller in the other. Games are not as brain melting as many people seem to be. Unlimited game playing as an alternative to hiring a nanny is where most parents go wrong nowadays. And they scratch their heads and say "I just don't know what to do with him anymore..." BAH! You'd know what to do with him if you had actually taken part in his early development you oblivious cunt.

/rant

>>942020
add the hobbit to this.

my kid will read ayn rand

and i agree with that guy video games don't melt minds
i just started a new fallout 3 game the other day and i'm a genius
and pokemon too

>>942094
Kindermund tut Wahrheit kund
He will hate it and he'll be right to do so.

>>942101
FUCK YEAH, POKEMON!

People can say that pokemania was child cancer, but they don't know shit about it. An RPG about a boy going on an adventure, capturing and raising animal friends, and stopping a gang of bad guys is a much better moral and values support structure that any other typical big name game nowadays like Gears of War or God of War...

Not that those games aren't fun as hell, but those games aren't for kids.

I'm going to treat my children as adults from the day the are born. If anyone tries to talk to them in that stupid high pitched baby voice I will smack them. I will probably read them Kafka or something, then when they can read themselves I'll buy them some simple books (yes Harry Potter too) and swiftly make them advance to more complex works.

And it's not even difficult, I know a six year old who reads Shakespeare on his own. How? His parents just made him read a lot, kids these days read maybe a couple of books per year, if that.

A clockwork orange

problem about pokemon is that it's marketed in a way that requires addiction. got 150? gotta create more! it's sad.

>>942115
right right right. real 'orrasho this chap is, my fellow droogs.

>>942117
aye. i had red as a kid and loved it to death. then i got silver, and loved it to death all over again. after that, i stopped because third generation was too meh to interest me, and then fourth generation was absolute horseshit.

mabey i'll save my DSlite and my SoulSilver as a relic to share with my kids...

"Look Johnathan. This is Pokemon. Are you ready to begin your own adventure?"

the next day: "Dad, I just got my first Gym Badge!"

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'Nor' is not mandated by the use of any negative, rather it is only required in the presence of the negative 'neither.' The exception to this is a compound sentence such as the following, in which a conditional transitory word (such as or) is used like so:
"I have never called you a fag, nor have I ever denied it."

lrn2grammar, come back, then try to correct something.

The Red Pony, just as my father read to me

Some Jules Verne, The Hobbit and Harry Potter, I guess.

Also, I like the idea of saving the good old gameboy and pokemon games, like you guys mentioned above :P But thats a whole other topic.

>>941318
This ^ comment

to this v person
>>942185