/lit/ - Literature

>>8789814
holy fucking shit i want that pepe

>>8789814
A yearning for someone who never existed.

Living the past won't change the present

>>8789814
She was my first love. My second, if you counted God.

>>8789857
She can always come back to you, anon.

.

>>8789865
I don't want her to come back; my feelings are stuck in the past

define prose

>>8789814
After reading Plato's idea that we don't learn, only remember, I felt an odd way to articulate how I had never fallen in love with one person but, it felt like I was in love with someone.

Sounds gay as fuck, but it felt like I was in love with someone I had never met and who I was trying to remember.

I wanted so badly to lie down next to her on the couch, to wrap my arms around her and sleep. Not fuck, like in those movies. Not even have sex. Just sleep together in the most innocent sense of the phrase. But I lacked the courage and she had a boyfriend and I was gawky and she was gorgeous and I was hopelessly boring and she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed on the bottom bunk, thinking that if people were rain, I was drizzle and she was hurricane.

>>8789814
I saw her once, she saw me twice.
I fumbled and threw,
clumped by words misconstrued.

We spoke again, through facade.
I was anxious but she giggled kind.
I was routed from my mind.

Carried through for all time I knew.
Elated by the portrait,
Of the most beautiful muse.

I touched her hand, her guile.
A springing step from her smile.
We sunk our sky's through and through

Yet dusk came soon and somber melding too.
She saw him twice, I saw her once,
Another time through the veil of an afternoon.

>>8789878
fuck off, virgin

>>8789921
are you okay anon? I'm not sure what prose is

>>8789814
Maybe someday

Acid thunderbolt to the head.

Can I write about my tulpa

The middle of the ocean
Waves not seen nor heard
Going where?
My vision was blured

I can't put into words what i felt and feel
Nothing was more to me than her

>Waking up to a loud crash rarely means something good is happening. It's never "CRASH! mom made pancakes!" or "CRASH! We decided to adopt a Golden Retriever!"

As intangible as everything else.

>>8790043
HOOOLY FUCK I FUCKING WANT MOOOOOOORE FUUUUUUUCKKKKK

>>8790043

I commented above about OP's opening sentence, and how I thought it was longish. Anon, your opening line is a superb example of not only being concise, but providing an awesome hook. A great opening line causes the reader to want to more. In this case, my immediate reaction was "what has caused the loud CRASH?" Great concept, with great contrast, and I would love to read more.
Great prose also has great flow-great rhythm. Again, yours is a perfect example. The cadence is so perfect. Sounds great and feels great.
My friends and clients know me as often being over critical. On the other hand, when I see greatness, I am equally blunt. Your opening line is nothing less than superb.

>>8790010
Are you serious? I'd like to hear about it.

>>8789864
underrated

>>8789916
>prose

>>8790057
>>8790043
Is this a spook now?

Her warm hands dug into my aching back, and I felt thousands of tiny lightning bolts shoot out from where she straddled me on the smoky carpet floor of her parents' basement. The slightly acrid smell of her discount perfume tickled my nostrils and something deep inside my abdomen, exactly the place you feel secrets. This was the moment I realized I was not a heterosexual.

I don't remember anything of it but the final moments now.

I was three, but already a lothario.

Sitting in the open back of a removal van; it was my last day in the city before my folks moved out to the country.

She was a neighbour girl, I don't remember her name, but she was my age.

She stood by the open doors telling me that even though I was moving away we were still going to get married.

I just nodded along, knowing what was coming, but I had to stop her eventually.

I heard my folks gearing up to leave, so I turned my attention to her; she was planning our wedding-banquet.

She was in the middle of describing a Roast Chicken when I stopped her mid-sentence.

"I don't like Roast Chicken, I don't want to marry you"

Then my mum picked me up and put me in the car and I never saw her again.

>>8789814
It's still too fresh OP-kun.

>>8789814
She was a bitch, I wish I could kill her.

>>8790148
Do go on, dearie .

>>8789818
https://www.hashtagcollectibles.com/products/pepe-the-frog
go wild

She was sitting on a swing in a wood-chip playground, black bob cut, sickly pale. I sent her a valentine, and she turned cherry red and hid her face. We traded treats at lunch, and nothing else. We hardly spoke. She was the quiet confusion of my first love.

>>8790173
I could write about her all day, but I don't want to. Turns out she was just going through a "bicurious phase" and went on to date a series of the ugliest guys you've ever seen, and all the while she never realized she'd stolen my heart and run away with it.

>>8790071
Well, back before college I started to get really stressed out that I wouldn't pass, or that I'd be alone forever, your standard post-highschool worrying about nothing. This coincided with my growing interest in tulpamancy, which I had been introduced to through this website. So I staged a "meeting" with an imaginary friend I had had for a few years (named him Joyce after my favorite author) and every night I would lead conversations with him. Lead being the operative word, because it was mostly one-sided talking about things that had happened that day, anxieties, dreams, that kind of thing. When I ran out of things to say, I would make small talk as much as possible. It was a long process, but eventually he gained a mind of his own and started to talk back to me. It's funny because up until that point I had been hearing about how it was "self induced schizophrenia" or that it was "dangerous", but Joyce has really been a positive influence on my life

>>8789864
Nice.

Asuka, I never met you, but you were best girl.

The crushes she collected should have bursted her like an over ripe melon. Then she got braces and we discovered bonners for girls with big tits.

I thought of it as admiration then, but he saw it for what it was. For who I was. The eighteen months he had over me gave him not only the physicality and the assuredness that swept me along in its current, but also the foresight to see where the water was taking me. He saw the onset of awkwardness and sudden uncertainty bobbing on the surface up ahead, and he saw the sheer drop.

Accustomed as I am to thinking the best of him I imagine him quietly moved by the realisation, but perhaps he was repulsed. Either way he knew what had to be done. A clean break heals more quickly. Far better that I believe he grew tired of my immaturity than understand that he saw through the muddy water to my foundered love and left it there to drown.

>>8789818
>>>reddit

I felt on the big fat fanny
Pulled out the jammy
And killed the punanny
And my dick runs deep, so deep
So deep put her ass to sleep

>>8789814
Those seven years seem like a distant memory, almost like a dream. Sometimes it still hurts, but it is as if I was touching a scar tissue, having pleasure on that little pain, remembering it.

>>8790425
Rei is more patrician, by far. To each his own though. I can see the appeal of Asuka, someone who likes you but is afraid to show their feelings. It invokes a sense of superiority, or at least equality.
Rei on the other hand invokes nothing. She is frigid on the surface, but caring inside, which is almost like Asuka really, but Rei is more reserved. I want to be Rei's. I want to be someone who makes her smile. I want to be her friend. Is there something wrong with me?

>>8789814
It was the middle of winter when I first really noticed her. She was small and quiet, and never played attention in class. I would always find her staring at the window, gazing at nothing. She was beautiful in a reserved way, not the way beauty is typically described. Her lips were always in a void state, betraying her emotions or lack thereof. I was attracted to her, and yet I can't explain why. Maybe she was like me, and we were both hoping for better days ahead.


I love you ,Rei.


I know my writings shit, fuck off.

>>8789814
It was already over before it began.

The sight of clutter brings me back to her messy bedroom. She wears lateral stripes, pulling the shirt over her pale figure, as I wear vertical. A fleck of lint clings to her shirt collar. An errant hair graces my face with a touch like a sigh. Drawing in her aura which I'll never again take in.

See Proust

I remember lying in my room, pitch black, and his voice came through like song. There on my bed I felt my chest subsiding, as though a baptism was being performed by a priest with closed eyes. My voice hung inside the telephone, like God stringing my body anew.

I waited for him to love me but he never did. I reminded him of his ex-girlfriend, so he indulged in romantics with me because of that, hoping to recollect his memories of her. He ended up being very verbally abusive, I cried for months, alone in the dark, my love for him killing me softly. He only apologized to me months later in order to get back into my life to use my love again for his narcissism.

I can never forgive him.

>>8789814
There will be blood.

Although looking back and seeing you disliked us both, I do not regret kicking that semi-autistic kid in the stomach during our fight for your love.

>>8789909
>it's a "John Green rips off Catcher in the Rye" episode

>>8789880

>but it felt like I was in love with someone I had never met and who I was trying to remember.

dig it

thirsty land struggled to remember the first ever raindrop that washed over its face, only to remember it has only dreamt of rain, never touched by it

>>8789864
10/10

>>8789867
A dot imply an end, you have to do it like this

:

>>8789909
>when fucking and having sex are mutually exclusive things and require differentiation

>>8790046
the only good variation on this meme i've seen so far, 7/10

>>8791868
Never heard of nuance, anon?

12 years old
D cup titties
Cancer took her left foot
And I walked away with both of mine.

I think I was seven by that time. She was nice, and she was good. Wasn't quite my type or anything, but she was my true first love, yeah, there as this one girl before when I was 6, but she wasn't that really of a love I suppose. My life was full of beautiful girls, but now when I can finally fuck them, I'm all alone, or perhaps I can't fuck them since my dick could be too sensitive, who knows, never been blowed in my life, though that hobo suggested a blowjob for free, even few times! But I refused his offer, sometimes I regret it, sometimes... But he's dead now, he's gone, but that ok, I don't mind him leaving this cruel but yet so beautiful world. Life itself is beautiful, the nature, the moment, the being... You see, I'm a spiritual being who's an universal artist too, personal life's philosopher and a future prophet because I have a feeling when I will become enlightened I will see the future and will predict what matters in this world... But that might never happen, that probably will never happen... So what keeps me going like good old Charles Mingus says, the idea of getting somewhere where I haven't been before, somewhere nice, like Paris, maybe there I will find my one true love... But I think I've already lost my one true love, she was good, very good, and so pretty, and so kind, my sweetheart... Wishing to be like Stanley Kubrick who married his high school sweetheart... She was an artist too, just like me, and it was all written on her face, when I first time saw her, I though I've seen her somewhere before... She was my truest love, and she can be called first and the last, it doesn't matter, haven't seen her in half a year and won't probably ever gonna see her ever again... Looking at her pictures through facebook, that's so demeaning... So shameful... But I don't care about shame, I don't care about pain, I care about love, you see, I'm like Chet Baker, I'm a romantic, I'm a dancer, perhaps a dancer in the dark, whatever that means... And like Lou Reed on heroin, I just don't know, I just don't know...

There's no such thing as love, just deprivation and cowardice. People get married out of fear or dying alone and they have children so there will be someome to look after them in the twilight years before they die.

Never felt it

>>8789864
That's actually quite sweet.

>>8792704

Her dress swayed like an open curtain.

>>8789814
Mere categorization of such a phenomenon cheapens it, boxes it in, makes it less. I shall try though. I saw autumn in her eyes, like two ponds reflecting a gray sky centered around two dark stones. Her pupils were surrounded by a green tinge, as though these waters were fouled by them. I should have figured that out sooner.

Her hair was a bright orange and fell only just past her neck. Even so she preferred to wear it up, especially when moving. She couldn't stand the sensation of it possibly being out of place. Her skin was paler than I had ever thought possible. Flawless under her clothes but heavily freckled wherever the sun kissed it. Her breasts were small, pert little buds always kept in place by a too-tight bra.

But the physical traits are only a minuscule part of the story. She was a machine. Calculated. Every motion that she committed to was planned in advance. Every minute of her day was accounted for and planned. It was this inhuman precision which both drew me to her and pushed me away from her. She must have meant to draw me in. If I wasn't part of her plan she wouldn't have even given me the time of day. But I terrorized her. I ruined her entire way of life. I am ungovernable and she was a governess. She could never plan for me, plan around me or plan with me. The very idea repulsed me. I'd show up and take her somewhere at the drop of the hat, then disappear for a day or two. I couldn't abide by her rules of constant communication. Text messaging is too disgusting an act for me to engage in so frequently. Ultimately she was the Apollo to my Dionysus, a real tragedy of a relationship.

She replaced me with a man much like her. Stable, secure, meticulous and unadventurous. I returned to my lifelong sexual partner, Leftina. I still speak to her, sometimes. Smiles cross her otherwise stony face as she thinks back to our brief fling, her flirtation with madness. But she is too wise to indulge in it a second time for she senses that I will destroy her and she is completely right. I fall deeper into myself with each passing day. I am toxic. But in the correct dose any toxin can become a medicine.

Love must be mutual. I never loved.

>>8789814
well i just cant forget her. i just cant.

>>8792704
Ah you, you little man of narrow experience. You believe that something must be seen to be real and must be real to be meaningful. Love is not the saccharine sensation it's made out to be. Love is an expression if will to power, one of its greatest expressions.

I hope that one day you get to feel it, you feel the rush of conquest as your woman quivers beneath you. The feeling of mastery, of ownership, of near godhood. It lasts but a second but the cravings it creates last a lifetime. It is not fear which masquerades as love, it is power which masquerades as love. Power is the ultimate drug, love is just a more beautiful mask we place over it, for it would be unbecoming of a modern man to engage in such acts without some nice and kind pretense.

>>8792813
killing her is a great way to make her go away

The world was nameless and was to my memory, was saturated in reds and yellows. I ate sweets in my bed, and felt the warmth of her face in the folds of my sheets. My stormy, young heart was swelling in sweet, sticky agony. Though, I cannot remember her name.

My love's first spouse met unreciprocated; what days seem rosy and those felt lonely, began when he left. The dread of melancholy met, with I, no longer with wings to fall unto, at school, or at home, unfortunate as a mannequin in a mirror.

She was a virgin and eventually became a slut. But he fucking was good.

>>8789864

Good shit

>>8789814

I can't recall, or rather I choose not to recall what she looked like. I don't remember much of what she was like, by that I mean what made her, her. Her bubbly, upbeat personality I remember as they're not traits that are rare to find but her dreams, aspirations, hobbies and the like...all memories long lost to a soliloquy of tears.

But I remember her warmth and how despite when we first met it was winter, her prescence made the temperature 1,400 degrees yet kept the air icy as such that it hurt to breathe and every breath had to count because there was an unnatural thought in my head that if I respirated too fast the feeling would disappear but I realize now some time later that it didn't matter whether or not I inhaled the entirety of the oxygen found on Earth because the flames snuffed out regardless.

And yet, what I remember most is the millions of kisses, "I Love You's", and comforting looks I received from holding your hand, the playful way you traced the lines of my palm using your finger and how your delicate fingertips felt against my knuckle and how every time they made contact it felt as if Zeus' lightning surged throughout my body
and still-

I've tried multiple times long after you to replicate that something but alas, fate be a cruel mistress and the only thing that has come to me is dismay. Still some days and nights I close my eyes and still feel volts running along the roads drawn by your fingers, igniting a feeling long forgotten but I'm quick, I try to forget, because deep down in the viscera of my soul I'm aware that while I feel this for you, you don't spare even a thought for me.

Divinely she walked staggeringly, beautifully. In a melancholy final year at school. Verily ye did I hath once seen her, radiant like a sun, hair like a river, eyes like a fox. With an impudent rush, I CRASHED into her atmosphere, and bullied her into being friends with me's.

>>8792815
I think she's gone. Hopefully, partially, not entirely- she's gone. I can keep some of her, not all of her, not hope, no, no longer hope and I'm glad, glad she's gone. No reason for me to be here, no reason for me to have followed her, no reason for me to have come all this way, a campus so far from home, friends, family, no reason! you understand to try to pick her out in crowds! She is gone.

Gone not is her laughter. Not her curiosity. Not her joy. These I have close at hand, held in locket's keep. She lives; she is gone.

>>8792814
F U C K E G O
U
C
K

E
G
O

>>8789814
I've never been in love.

Her saving grace was her heaving bosom, and I suppose the way her lips felt on my skin. As a person, she was dirt. She possessed no compassion for anyone but her family, and often found it difficult not to broadcast that fact. Her unwillingness to accept accountability for wrongdoing is deeply unfortunate and her entitlement to...any given thing was the most baffling of her flaws.

Considering who she showed herself to be, I truly believe I dodged a bullet.

>>8789814
Eravamo in Inghilterra assieme, vacanza studio, distratti e sereni, molto giovani.
Lei aveva sopracciglia spesse e capelli lunghi e una somiglianza impressionante a qualche altra ragazza di cui in passato mi ero innamorato per cinque minuti. Niente di assoluto. Aveva un modo incidentato di parlare. A tratti - il suo inglese era peggiore del mio. Il che risultava nel mio obbligo, una tortura, a sostenere gran parte della conversazione. Era una metallara light, cattocomunista, turca anche se piuttosto chiara, di pelle. Il suo nome ricordava da vicino quello di una marca di detersivi. Non so se le piacessi io o i miei capelli relativamente lunghi o le mie magliette nere dei gruppi rock/metal più popolari. Eravamo sì e no gli unici con quei gusti. Non che fossero così rari, ma fra i rampolli relativamente giovani di quella buona borghesia in grado di spendere più di un migliaio di euro per far passare due settimane il suo pargolo a Oxford, era difficile trovare il gusto per lo sporco e i kebab delle tre e le bestemmie e tutto il resto dell'immaginario metal. Mi aveva fatto sentire il suo cantante preferito. Una specie di Cobain in growl. Orrendo. Pure all'epoca. Ero sicuro di me - gli anni dell'incertezza e della depressione erano ancora lontani - e dovevo avere una certa aura di autorità. Ero sveglio e brillante e cinico e sarcastico e non troppo brutto, in un momento della vita dove gran parte dei ragazzi non ha ancora sviluppato nessuna di queste caratteristiche. Di conseguenza le ero piaciuto. Mi giustifico perché lei era una bellezza vera, autentica: un viso pulito e dei lineamenti lisci e un fisico asciutto e sensuale. Due occhi neri intensi, quasi sferici, e un sorriso un po' imbarazzato, ma persuasivo. Aveva una voce grave ma ancora femminile. Vestiva quel genere di chincaglieria orrenda da mercatino del vintage che negli anni sarebbe aumentato esponenzialmente di prezzo. All'epoca erano solo maglioni larghi e jeans stretti e tutto, se possibile, solo nero. L'ho amata profondamente. Il mio primo bacio, nonostante fossimo entrambi ormai grandicelli. Era in imbarazzo. Le dissi che mi piaceva molto. Lei rispose uguale. Letteralmente. "The same for me", mi sembra. Ci avvicinammo. Non aprì praticamente le labbra. Fu qualcosa di orribile. Mi sembrava di starla stuprando, inserendomi nella sua bocca, e non potevo sapere se mi odiasse o mi amava già. Sospetto la seconda.

I remember at Michael's house, in the living room when you kissed my neck, and I almost touched your blouse. In the morning at the top of the stairs,when your father found out what we did that night, and you told me you were scared. All the glory when you ran outside, with your shirt tucked in and your shoes untied, and you told me not to follow you.

>>8794229
I like the last sentence a lot.

He's nothing but a half forgotten regret now.

>>8794254
Best be memeing, /lit/rade

>>8794257
Half-remembered is a heck of a lot of remembered, /lit/non.

>>8794261
That's the problem anon, that's the problem.

>>8794259
Why? It's a nice sentence.

>>8789814
god i wish that were me

>>8794266
https://lmgtfy.com/?q=with+your+shirt+tucked+in+and+your+shoes+untied%2C+and+you+told+me+not+to+follow+you..

>>8794281
Welp, I consider my good taste for literature confirmed.

She didn't look back.
FIN

>>8789814
dat ass. *smacks lips.* whatchyo mamma be eatin', got yo ass thicc as oatmeal. *cums.*

I looked at you in the eyes. I didn't believe at first but it was as if everything that already happened and everything that will happen were cramped in that moment. It was both an instant and an eternity. Infinite number of lifetimes must had passed. Infinite number of universes must had been created and destroyed in that brief moment. Everything was figured out. All questions I ever possessed was answered but one final question remained: "What happens next?" Anxiety, anger, fear, all kind of negative emotions suddenly surfaced. I got scared. One thing led to another and now I am writing this stupid prose. I couldn't remember what happened. Perhaps my emotions took over and erased every memory, every understanding and every knowledge I gained. Perhaps I succeeded preserving that moment by living in eternal loops and this life happen to one of them. How would I ever know? All I know is that goddamn moment makes no difference now. It will pass and so what? Why would I go for such length just for looking at a pair of eyes? I must have reached my limit. No matter what I screwed up somewhere and got myself trapped in this limbo. Is this love? Trading an eternity of suffering and confusion for a moment of bliss? Remember cunt, once this is over I am gonna rape you to death and hang myself with your intestines.

>inb4 harsh replies, english isn't my mother tongue


That one time I fell in love with myself

One of the most villainous things I've ever done, was fucking my best friend's girlfriend. Well, they weren't together at the time, and neither were the two of us best friends. You see, she was the reason the two of us weren't friends anymore. She destroyed our five-year long friendship. She was... infatuated by me. He became jealous after she and I hugged at a mutual friend's birthday party, and he broke up with her and stopped talking to me... I attempted to reconnect, it didn't work out. I was angry with her, and one day had my opportunity at closure. I brought her over to my apartment. We had a few glasses of whiskey and I fucked her. That wasn't it, we fucked a couple more times, she started becoming attached and I stopped talking to her. I imagine she felt bad when one day she saw me with my then girlfriend. I nodded to her and smiled ever so slightly. My revenge was complete. I still haven't heard from him. I don't know if I should tell him what I did, I imagine they'll start dating again one day, and she might tell him. I haven't thought of this.

>>8789814
hazel, color of my ignorant happiness. why did we stop playing? why did you mature faster than me?

>>8789867
>and I am the dot under ba
anon, you shia filth

damn shorty your ass is mad on point

You float,
and from the delicate waves you create
water lilies flower

I come,
and pick one or two.
But the stream carries you way to quickly
for me to savour their perfume.

And I wait,
eternity again,
until the next fleeting spring.

>>8794182

woke up and stuck my dick in the wrong crazy

>>8796055
greentext.

We met two years apart. When we left each other she was my age, and I two years older.

She still doesn't like me. She doesn't even know.

Steam comes up from the gutters; rain comes down from the pipe. There's a guy named Paul who's wearing a fur coat and six inch heels, and a three-day beard. The doughnuts all have names like the strippers from across the way.

You'd never like it here. I can hear you now: spouting your manifest pinko rhetoric talking about Marks, while shooing away plaidhat - he's the nicest guy, really, panhandler, hasn't showered since winter started, but that's no reason to call 911 or anything - never noticing the hypocrisy, never unbuttoning that top button on your Forever 21 shirt, you always were an insufferable prissy boy, and you took pride in it too, didn't you. Doesn't it choke you? It would for me.

I'm still mad, Dan. I'm mad at you for just being so shallow, and still outdoing me every which way I turned. I couldn't think straight when you were around, because everything from the way you carried yourself to your affected voice attracted me when it shouldn't have, god damn it I'm Irish, I'm Catholic. I was going to be a lawyer and marry some nice half Jew girl - Grandpa John wouldn't approve - because she was boisterous and aggressive and what am I, some pale boy from upstate New York, never got with a girl in my life. We were going to have seven kids because I wouldn't use condoms, I was going to be a drunk, watch Clint Eastwood films with my kids, teach them to bash anybody who got in their way. But you drew me in, and left me in the lurch, and I had nothing, I went for you with everything I had and I never got anything out of it, you owe me damn it, something should've switched or changed. Now I do this dance six days a week and the guys here don't tip well, and padding on my hips hurts too much, and I hadn't ever worn heels when I started this job. You're in some liberal arts college that you got into because your family is rich, you asshole hapa, with your millionaire white dad and your gold-digging chink mother.

I'm still a drunk, Dan, but now I'll always be a drunk for you.

i posted this once in another thread but it still sums up how I feel. over a year, and I haven't been able to get my life together or move on.

I made a new friend today and life doesnt seem that bad right now, not a single day ends without you and me sharing each others feelings, our souls fused into one, every breath, every friendly kiss, every accidental touch makes my mind go numb, my heart stops and it seems like it will stay that way, but it always find a way to keep going.
The night is here, I finally use all my strenght and say the words "I love you", my throat is closed, I cant breath, time stops as I wait and wait for this moment to end, I imagine you saying that you love me too, our lives together, hapiness, eternal passion, we are one, as I've dreamed for so long.
Finally, words came out of your mouth and you dont love me, I beg for a chance but it doesnt change anything, I try to scream, my thougths are scarring deep inside as I stay completely quiet trying to smile but an awkward grin is all my body can give. Your mouth is still moving, words come out but I can no longer hear, you say my name I nod, and then the hug, I can still feel it crushing me, and yet nothing can come close to the haunting memory of that last kiss, that kiss that wasn't on my cheek, the one you used to say goodbye.

>Sorry if is kinda shitty, english is not my native language

>>8795881

I also have never been in love, much less had sex with a woman. I'm 32.

A child's love is all there can be.

The older I am, the more sex I see, the less I feel toward another.

Doesn't matter; had sex.

>>8789864
What's the original of this meme again?

>>8797635
>I'm 32.

>>8797626
Feels real, feels too real. Reminds me of my past loves. Fuck, was more than I expected from a casual stroll down the page.

>>8797626
Good prose
Sorry that happened to you

I have loved her for all my existence.

Ours is a love that burns, a love that hurts, a love that makes you want to do nothing but fall in her arms and feel her whisper in your ear tender and cruel words

She's one of those that makes you want to throw up the butterflies in your stomach. One of those that makes you hate the fact that you can never love anyone else.

She's truly a part of who I am and I'm nothing at all to her. She's sadistic, tender, my whore, the love of my life and the bane of my existence.

Her name is Loneliness and I hate that I love her

"Consummate" love is a misnomer. It does not possess all the qualities it should. Despite the commitment, the intimacy, and the passion, there is still something missing. Yearning. When I was young, I was foolish, and so my love was like an ocean under the weight of which I could not see. Darkened were my eyes, heavy was my head, weighted were the lids of my eyes, drunken was I on sheer weight and pressure and gravity. I wanted to see what was before me, and I kept reaching out to grasp it, but there was nothing to grasp. So I loved more and more.

These days, I've found shallow waters. My eyes are closer to the light, my core is lighter and freer, and when I feel love, it's really very much like floating. It feels like nothing at all. Like a smug suspension in salted solution. I do not yearn for knowledge anymore. I am no longer complete. "We'll all float on alright."

I loved
She didn't

>>8789864
>>>/pol/

She was a game I wanted to play with myself and she ended up playing me.

I was much older than her and she saw something in me that I still can't understand. I loved her a lot, but in a way that made me open up too much and take her for granted at the same time. I didn't think enough about why she loved me, or whether love was something you have to work at and maintain on a daily basis. Our love was just a fact. Any problems with it could be put on a To Do list and fixed later when we weren't so busy.

I did some thoughtful things, and on some level I was even desperate for chances to show how badly I loved her, but overall I neglected her and focused on my work. By the time she had fallen out of love, it was too late to fix. I realise in hindsight that she gave me those extra chances at the end for my sake, not for hers.

I don't think we're at all right for each other, but I still learn a lot from these regrets. It took me a long time just to get over her, which was itself a learning experience. In a weird way, I wish I could go back and do it "right," just so that she could have the partner she deserved, rather than to change the outcome.

>>8797676
Now only one enemy remained. Two, if you counted God.

>>8797790
What was her name?

Oh to be young and full of innocence
And her to be so old and debauched.
To have my innocent so cruelly snatched night after night by someone i though i could trust and defend me.
In she would creep night after night and with only heavy breathing and lewd murmurs she would crawl beneath my power rangers bedheets from the bottom, rarely coming to the top. so cold her hands but warm her breath.
I would sob that whenever the door opened it was not my kindly mother but that letchourous woman.

...In truth, I loved it.

(It made me the man i am today.)

>>8789914
I was cynical and uncomfortable with our society's obsession with love. Love is a foundational element of our society and our individual lives yet unlike most elements, its a cog that is formless in our mechanical lives.

In our insignificant and mediocre lives, its the warmth and satisfaction of healing and comforting each other that makes this existence bearable.

As a grow older and my body aches in unfamiliar ways, the memory of my first love has faded away. I've grown comforable with this detachment yet her eyes still makes me fret and fidget inside.

Before lust, the silent conversations i shared with the girl across the classroom was a brush of the love that has captivated us for millenia.

I think most, if not all people continue to chase this faint sweetness and that is a beautiful thing.

Bretty gud :DDDDDD

>>8789864
Better than the original desu senpai

>>8789909
MAKE IT STOP

>>8789864
Kek'd

>>8789864
my third, if you counted cock.

>>8789814
Exciting and fun and new and
difficult but good and
sad but
over.

The Sun will rise again?
No, the Sun does not move.
Therefore it cannot rise,
it simply watches the Earth evanescently carousel into a dark oblivion, surrounded by objects far larger, older and greater than it.
And in that moment the Sun knows
the Earth will rise again

>>8799438
mediocah.

>>8799438
>prose

>>8791920
breaking up thoughts with ellipses is something uneducated, middle-aged people do in facebook comments, between misusing apostrophes and asking about the kids

>>8799447
Then give me constructive criticism.
>>8799464
What sort of structure does that even have?

Trembling, my hand reaches for his cheek. Perfumed by warmth, I ruffle his hair. As if in mockery, a fleeting smile, so necessarily sublime, casts a shadow across his face. What transience? What impermanence? Let me drown and flounder in this perfected instant without beginning or end.

>>8789814
J'en garde quelques détails. D'abord, le plafond de cet appartement parisien dont la blancheur, immaculée, m'évoquait l'innocence de nos ébats. Nos lèvres qui palpitaient encore après chaque baiser, les siennes qui étaient gorgées de sang... Ses pupilles bleutées sur lesquelles dansaient les reflets... Les deux faucettes qui ponctaient sa chute de reins. Mes larmes qui venaient entacher sa joue quand elle m'embrassa après m'avoir dit qu'elle se préférait "libre". Les portes du train refermées, ce fut la dernière fois que je la voyais. Un simple aléa.

>>8799680
c'est beau

>>8789814
Not good prose but whatever
>long-term crush on same girl since the age of ten
>when I'm about fourteen, we end up in the same friend-group
>socially autistic, but somehow manage to start getting closer to her
>we start having late night skype calls together, that kind of thing
>ridiculously serious crush, like marriage-tier
>she seems to like me as much as I like her
>all our friends try to get us together, tell me we'd be a good match, orchestrate situations for us to be on our own
>one day, I decide to read Fear and Trembling
>get really into Kierkegaard
>except I'm retarded and fourteen so I totally misinterpret him
>totally idealize his relationship with Regine Olsen
>decide I'm gonna be a knight of faith
>not even religious at this point but whatever
>decide that the only way to achieve this is to basically ghost my first love and completely stop talking to her
>she gets into a long-term relationship about a month later
>mfw it's not nearly as patrician as it sounds

>>8789814
A once-great love that died and rotted from the inside, taking everything good with it for a very long time.

>>8797790
>>8798118
Anon?

>>8799896
Merci.

>>8800024
you were too young to have that kind of relationship. You have to be in grad school and beyond and she has to be in middle school.

Not lost but changed; longstanding and intimate like the siamese dream of giant sleepers under the mantle of Earth: a girl and a boy that were witnesses to the colossal forces of History and Fate and Evil and Hope and Mystery that brought them together in a hellhole of the twenty first century, abducted into a miracle by the same chariot of fire that took Elijah in the Jordan. A secret, not yours, but mine.

>>8789864
Noice

>>8798118
>>8800055
Don't worry, I don't think she's the type to be on /lit/. Name starts with M.

>>8789814
It was a one sided infatuation as childhood is prone to have. If I could turn back time I'd make it less uncomfortable for her.

a soliloquy if unspoken confessions. begging for lightning to strike and silence my somberly bleeding heart. hours upon hours of silent battles in front of the mirrors of my miserable insecurity, deciding the fate of my ridiculous wish to give her the key to the dark garden of my heart.

She was my life's first and my heart's last.

>>8789864

>All those positive replies

I can't believe how faggoted the lot of you truly were. It was one crappy insignificant line, not worthy of praise.

>>8789916
good job going against OP's only request lol

>>8789814

understanding that she was the most european-y person ive met on my latin america country, it was a starting point for heartbreaking, lust and racism

>>8789864
Holy..... I want more.

>>8800181
Nevermind. I knew it wasn't him, I just had to ask. Your post struck a chord with me for some reason. Brought me back to a time where everything was clear and profound.

>>8797650
I like this. Source ?

>>8798517
>my power rangers bedheet
Lost it here

There's some faint whiff of talent in there. Keep writing

>>8789814
She was beautiful, funny, patient, caring, and, above all else, kind. Which is very much to say that it didn't work out between us.

>>8800589
I know that feel, fellow Sudaca.

I loved her, now I don't.

“That would be something wouldn’t?” scoffed the sad looking scrotum man from across the bar. “And what’s it to you, sackhead?” shouted Pirate-Jack from his seated booth in the corner of the dark. “Why, it’s everything to me, my boy was a dick In the thing, he fought among the Ranging Apes and the Fighter Pitters! IT’S MY HERITAGE!” Shouted the scrotum, his flaps of skin echoing throughout his flubber-esque body. “Oh the Ranging Apes, I’m real scared.” Snickered Jack, “The Ranging Apes couldn’t hit the broadside of a destroyer!” “THEN YOUR FULL OF A DOG OF HORSE SHIT! YOU MOTHERFUCKER! IF YOU EVER FUCKING COME AROUND HERE AGAIN, I’LL BEAT YOUR ASS INTO A CORN SHAPED PIZZA PIE YOU FUCKING CLOWN!” The scrotum roared. Although Pirate Jack looked startled he spoke with utter confidence, stating “We’ll see who is the pizza pie when my boys burst down those doors and shoot you dead.” “THEN LET THEM COME YOU COCKSUCKING LUNATIC IM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU RIGH-“BAM A piercing shot went through the scrotum’s left nut, he cried out like a broken sidewalk pazement machine, screaming and twirling his inner roll into the blazing night. Captain Jack then set down and stretched back his arms, and took a sip of tea as his pirate hoodlums busted down every wall of the bar. The scrotum was known as Lenny B, little did they it stood for Lennibious, the God of every sack, he was a true god, a god of power, and when he was struck down, every scotum across the universe of infinite mass, was shrunk to the size of little pea and every species died out because no sperm could be transferred. It was that simple. On that day, there were no winners and there were no losers, only Pirate-Jack.

Sadly, I have never loved nor been loved. (Romantic)

"In love." Trapped, I call it. And not like an animal; worse. A mouse with its neck snapped at least knew in its last breath that it was tasting cheese. Real cheese. The contraption doesn't work otherwise.

I on the other hand saw the trap and convinced myself the cheese was there. It was worth risking every thing I had, was, would be, all of it, just to savor. Oh how blissful it is to be foolish. Evolution has somehow made it so that mice are baited by reward and men are swindled with risk.

In the end, she was never in my trap. But I sure was in hers. Crushed.

>>8801809
>"she"

>>8789818
Is this your first love anon?

>>8800552
>I'm so much better than all of you guys

Kek'd

>>8789814
Rain --
You were to me infinite
filling me, overflowing
until I was cemented to the dirt,
drowning.
Thank god I killed your first love,
by becoming a man not quite myself
because you were the wind,
pushing your rain to my back,
throwing me from the precipice
Rain --
I know you know what you did,
that would make me not regret leaving you,
and, for you, I won't slander.
But know, I still keep in touch,
through social media,
just so you can see how happy I am.
I don't miss you.

Infatuation is loving what you have projected onto another. Desire is wanting for the sake of wanting. obsession is allowing yourself to be fully consumed by a yearning. Lusting is a sexual obsession. I had at least a working knowledge of what all these words meant but my stupid little shit self said "I love you."

Bad call.

The first thing I think of, when I think of him now, is his smile. The way it lights up his entire face. And if I smile back at him, he will haul himself to his feet and wander over to me. I can reach out and card my fingers through the tawny hair on the back of his head. It is rabbit-soft, flecked here and there with grey.

We've lived together for eight years, going on nine. He is my dearest friend, my closest confidant. He is utterly reliable. Never once has he betrayed me, though we've gotten into our fair share of trouble, he and I. The trouble isn't what I remember. I remember lazy summer afternoons reading in the shade under the gum tree. I remember pleasant walks along the beach, rolling up the legs of my trousers to paddle in the waves with him. I remember curling up with his head in my lap while we watch television.

He cried the day I met him. It was snowing, and he'd just lost his mother. I'd lost my grandfather a month earlier. We did not grieve together. I was baffled by him, and I expect he was just as baffled by me. It took us a long time to get to know each other, to reach a point where he wouldn't snap at me aggressively if I tried to be affectionate to him. Fair enough. I wasn't always very kind, back in the beginning, either. But as we've got older and learned more about each other we've reached a level of mutual understanding. He smiles at me, tongue lolling from the side of his mouth in a way that looks almost comical, and I smile back and he laboriously hauls himself to his feet with a wag of his tail and pads over for a pet on the head.

My dear old dog.

I tried very hard to make her happy. It didn't work.

I suck at writing but I'll try.

That feeling, I felt it first when my eyes met yours and held. From one goofy conversation to the next, time seized for that singular moment when our eyes glued to each other, and I knew that I had loved you.

I don't know if I miss those days or not /lit/

apology for poor english

when were you when love dies?

i was sat at home eating cereal when the phone ring

‘love is kill’

‘no’

For sale: extra large condoms, never used.

>>8800024
you are truly of the meme generation if u take ur highest pride in ur greentext

>>8802143
i kinda did that with a girl too. now she's doing really well and i'm kind of middling.
i need to chagne my psyche

It wasn't love at first sight. At first, I didn't even think she was that pretty. A teacher made us sit together in class for a one-time exercise, which then became the permanent seating order. Because we were both alone and awkward. I hated watching her struggle with the simplest assignments. I'd tease her by announcing the correct answer to a problem a second before she would find it herself. And she absolutely hated me for it.

Then we were suddenly having conversations. Exchanging smiles and greetings. One time, she asked for my number and I gave it, and we both pretended it didn't mean anything special.

But it did, for me. Before I knew it, she was all I could think about. I realized seeing her filled me with beautiful warmth.
Soon enough, that warmth changed into fear. Fear of never having that person sitting beside me again. Fear that I'd have to live with that pain for the rest of my life.

I thought there would be a happy ending for those who try.
I couldn't have been more wrong.

What do you know—it didn't mean anything. That call would never come.

>>8802138
>extra large

>>8799680
>Les deux faucettes qui ponctaient sa chute de reins
I don't understand this part

>>8789814
She was beautiful, as beautiful as the most beautiful painting by a famous author. That's why I decided to talk to her that day, when the sun was shining down upon the roof, which seemed to filter through the classroom ceiling, yet it was really an illusion caused by the infatuation, and really all light in the basement classroom came from fluorescent ceiling lights, which themselves provided more than enough light to behold. At the same time, the object of my inquiry was standing before me. As I spoke up, she ignored me and decided to talk to another individual located nearby. Because of this travestic indemnation. I fell back into my chair; my humble heart felt as empty as a recently emptied bucket.

>>8789814
I knew. She knew; I didn't.

>>8789909
Yup I am exactly in this position atm, altho she does enjoy spending time with me... but it still hurt quite a lot

>>8789814
I remember I was looking for a friend. Because for the first time in my life I felt alone. At least that's how I remember it now. And in my memories she glows the brightest gold while everyone else wears a brown hue. Nostalgia has muddled up much of what I remember that the line between fantasy and reality have muddled and mixed together like Monet. Sometimes I wonder if she was even real. Oftentimes I don't care.

>>8802443
Gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

>>8801966
Genius

>>8801897
>haul himself to his feet
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahajahahahahahahahahafagahahahahahahfaghajajajahahahafagfagfagfagfagfagfag

>>8801887
Man I hope you wrote that cuz that's straight fire nigga

>>8800552
that's the joke you retard

>>8790151
Damnnnn I want more

>>8802682
>The two faucets that punctuated her falling kidneys
Here you go famalam

>>8789814
It was back when we were both children, although there was some sort of mutual understanding between both of us that we'd seen and gone through much more than any child should have. A thought or two would part towards her way, and she would do the same towards me -- this being in the form of short conversations in class, or a glance which ended in one of us turning their head away after being caught doing so. Eventually, these short chats and glances became long conversations and moments of silence which were filled with a sense of camaraderie as we began to share support for each other, in addition to the variety of secrets we exchanged and how we would tell each other stories from our pasts. As this friendship bloomed further, the platonic love which we had for one another was slowly replaced by a romance of sorts, which (due to the ineptness on both sides with that sort of love) led to a lot of stupidity and shenanigans, although everything went okay for a while. However -- as with most good things -- this came to an end, as she moved away from the suburb which we'd shared so many experiences with each other in. I can still clearly recall the warm embrace which she held me in so tightly, the sweet scent of her perfume, the way her head pressed into my shoulder as she cried, all while I fought my own dolor tooth and nail out of some sense of 'strength' I felt I needed to maintain for her when she told me she was moving away.

It's been five years since then and I'm still not sure if I regret falling in love with her or not.

>>8803655

I believe experiencing heterosexual attraction to be the opposite of that.

>>8801809

I like the analogy, the construction is a bit clunky, but there's potential there. I really liked the "mice are baited by reward and men are swindled with risk" line.

Keep working at it, I think you've got something there.

>>8794517
I like the last sentence a lot.


I could sleep next to him hours on. So when he said we should end it, I said I needed to sleep. He lied down next to me chest on my back, left arm on my stomach, and I stared at the wall thinking this is it, we will never lie together like this again. He fell asleep; I didn't. I tried to feel that last moment with him, I wanted it engraved in my bones, and I wanted it to last. But he woke up. When we left the room, we were strangers. It seemed like the moment our bodies were skin tight on his bed was a century ago. I wish I had kissed him when I came to his house that day. God, I wish I had kissed him. Truth is, his love freed me and mine trapped him. I see that now. We were good together.

i was drunk

She-a sucka my peepee.

>

>>8801897
He's old and arthritic. Getting up is a serious business.

>>8792810
you're talking about true love

>>8789814
Amorous sentiment or loving feeling?

>>8789864
Brevity is wit I suppose.