/lit/ - Literature

>He he he, that he had heeded Howard, ha ha, it was hardly horrible.

>>8498390
That should be a colon. Semicolons don't work in that context.

>>8498390
>He had but one fear; others.

>>8498390
>The first fires broke out in the season of pomegranates.

>>8498390
listen to
>>8498651
And also contemplate using something a bit less cliche IMO

He had but one fear; knives.

Holy..... I want more...

He had but one fear, fear itself.

Panic!

>>8498390
wow you're an idiot

>>8498701
Said the man to himself; in fear.

He had but one fear; colons.

He had but one queer; himself.

He himself had one fear; butts

Dilleroo realised he had only one joke to hear that was about his own expense repeatedly lately!

His post had but one quality; shit.

He was of the condition of having just one fear, or if you would prefer, nothing petrified him more than a specific idea that haunted him frequently and without relent; it was, in name and in practice, as was told to me by a most discerning and steady-handed gentleman whom I have known for many years and have a good notion to trust in matters of people or economics, himself.

>He had but one fear; Bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonnerronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoordenenthurnuk.

>>8498390
We've both been rejected by the world. We both feel the same threat. And yet...here we are, fated to kill each other in the end.

Chance worried he might have made a mistake by dumping poor Julie four months ago, when she went missing. He sat at the table, thinking over what she had said, the detail of their conversation growing more mysterious by the minute. Did she intend to take off? Should he expect the cops? Probably not, he thought, since they would have contacted him already. Still, Julie was gone -and now she disappears, while he was in Wales.

>>8498390
> His ass belched fire! The fat under his began to boil, the skin sagging down around his bones. A skeleton in brothy soup, a scrotum with bulging legs ready to burst.

Fear had but one fear: he

>Fear and fear and fear and fear.

He had 2 enemies. One, if you counted god.

>Xe had seven hundred twenty six enemies, four hundred and ten, if you counted x/s genderx.

>>8498390
>Greetings.

>>8498914
What is the origin of this meme?

>mama

>>8498940
zero

Harry locked his mother in the closet.

He had but one fear; Las Vegas

>>8498948
>harry potter is a huge delusion of his mother's mind while she is stuck in a closet wishing she'd raised a proper boy

>he had but one fear, that he would fear his fear; he feared this fear of fear. Fearing his fear of fear of fear, he feared that the fear was far too fearful, that fear of fear of fear of fear.

Waking up to one enemy rarely means something good is happening. It’s never “CRASH! Zero if you counted God!” or "CRASH! God is on your side this time!"

>he meme only on one meme, meme meme, meme of meme, meme himself made meme, meme meme of one meme meme meme, a meme

>>8498689
He had but one fear; reddit.

>>8498952
>He Las Vegas'd fear but loathing, one.

>>8498390
xe had one fear; cishet men.

He had but one love; Bob Marley.

>he had but one ring, to rule them all

He had one butt; it stunk.

>He didn't have anything, negative one if you count God.

he had but one fear; grammar

I got 99 problems, 100 if you counted God

>He had but himself to fear.

>>8499039
I commented above about OP's opening sentence, and how I thought it was longish. Anon, your opening line is a superb example of not only being concise, but providing an awesome hook. A great opening line causes the reader to want to more. In this case, my immediate reaction was "why does he fear himself?" Great concept, with great contrast, and I would love to read more.

Great prose also has great flow-great rhythm. Again, yours is a perfect example. The cadence is so perfect. Sounds great and feels great.

My friends and clients know me as often being over critical. On the other hand, when I see greatness, I am equally blunt. Your opening line is nothing less than superb.

>>8499054
Tell me, now. Do people like you usually wrap their tongues around the dick or just come-as-it-does? Good pasta.

>>8498390

>; himself

Semicolons are for connecting independent clauses. "Himself" isn't an independent clause. Independent clauses can stand on their own as complete sentences.

>>8499054
"CRASH!"

>>8498940
Reddit screengrab of great openers

>>8498390
Holy shit, 2deep4me. How do you come up with shit this original ?

>>8499054
upboat

>>8498390
>The only thing, he had; to fear, was fear: itself.

>>8498781
IM A SCATMAN

>>8498390
A semicolon is a hinge; a colon is an arrow.|

>He had but one fear: walrus dicks. It dated back to his fateful tenth summer, when his hippie parents took him on the Rainbow Warrior to confront whaling vessels in the Bering Sea. Twenty years later, he could not even look at a Greenpeace poster or scrimshaw without trembling uncontrollably.

Be sure your opening lines will make the reader want to continue.

He had felt just as anxious years before when his childhood bully had finally stumbled upon his secret weakness, physical pain.

>>8498684
Sold.

>>8498984

He had but one diary; mine, desu.

He had but one enemy; two if god was real.

>>8500174
sounds like my diary, desu

It was a cold, dark and rainy night in Future-Polis. But things were not as they seemed. In the shadows a being moved, unheard of and unseen, towards an unknowing victim, living the last minutes of it's life without even being aware of it. Tonight blood would flow.

>>8498984
He had but one fear; that someone had already written the great american shitpost so that he wouldn't get the chance to; forcing to deliver him pic related out of respect;

>>8499054
>leaving out laxnut

>>8498759
Literally gibberish

He had but one fear; Virginia Woolf.

>>8500181
The diary of Hue Phoric.

A gust of wind, rain, sleet, and snow pummeled Ray Garver in the gut, carried him in the air for nearly a second, and slammed him down on the hard, wet road.

help

She was fourteen when she understood what had happened. In a pool to bathe, sitting, arms curled around thin shins with lips pursed and quiet between her kneecaps, she mixed what the Hollydown men and women had said with what had happened to her father.

Write what I know? More like write what your girlfriend blows [1].


[1] This dick.

>>8498390
September 9, 2001. Gary and I were skating at a hospital on top of a huge hill overlooking a valley

>he had but one fear, the fear which is a fear which fears itself as its own fear, or it is that in the fear that the fear fears itself as it's own fear; the fear is not the fear but that the fear fears itself as its own fear.

>>8498390
Dankmeme; the nuptialisms of the cosmogenous nonhegemonous frog-god's thought-speech were divine but none knew the sound for hierarchical thought makes no sound but rather resoresexonerates in the believer's mind; make no mistake that King-Ten-Henry of the diurnallyliturgicalclergy knew not that the frog-god thought-spake unto him, for he was bbb in the soul and ddd in the mind; but then the reader asks "what then of Sisyphax and Polycles, of Hermunictus and Ron, warefor are their tails entwined?"

>>8500198
Wow! I just want to say that this is some of the best writing I have ever seen, and this is coming from a lifelong avid reader! My friends call me a critical person, but I know greatness when I see it, and believe me, I see it!

How do you conjure such a keen sense of foreboding and dread so exquisitely? The masterful use of varied sentence length built the tension to a fever pitch, and the careful withholding of information ("unheard and unseen, towards an unknowing victim") had me on the edge of my seat craving to learn more.

Seriously, I hope you become a professional writer.

>>8498390
>His fear had but one himself; his fear.

>>8498390
He had but one fear; Bret Easton Ellis.

>>8498390
>but
you're writing in a style as dated as your picture u noob bitch! it's mdoern day, don't think that the old stories were good because they said "all but for a chance primblossom," they were good for other reasons and that shit is aattached to it but not the same as what made it good. Try to understand this soon.

>>8501370
big words -> little thoughts

>>8498390
>had but one fear

Still don't understand the 'had but' term

>>8498914

Your opening sentence is nothing bar the manifestation of the ideal beauty. I just don't know how God himself didn't think of it as an opening line for the bible! Listen I'm a real hardass with my criticism; but trust me I orgasimed thrice while reading it. It made me think good, feel good, and get over my abortion.
The prose is on par with Stephen King's, dare I say, and it really just gets the reader hella hooked! The buildup is already there, and it's FABULOUS! You should definitely finish this and publish it. I'm happy to critique more, and I'm nothing but objective. I'll personally edit it if you allow me. You know you can just come to my apartment, I'm currently living alone so there's an empty room. I guess I can take you in as my personal little boipuspus fucktoy haha! Pls send more.

>>8503396
It's synonymous with "only" in this context
He had (only) one fear.

>At a glance, the room showcased that which could only be properly described by the word "adala". Not viciousness, madness, degeneracy, sin. Just adala.

He had but one fear; girls.

"Why the fuck did I erase my memory?"

"shit nigger!" i shouted as i awoke. could this be the end of pudding man.

>>8503605
its a 1500 page surreal-autobiography i infused with commentary about the threat of greenlandization of the western world

>>8498390
He looked at her. Tears quell in his eyes, as they did about an hour ago in hers.

>>8498390
>While desperately clinging to the balcony railing and with his legs helplessly flailing in the air, a threatening member appeared in the doorway. For a split second he gazed into the perplexed eyes of the enormous wolf-man before plunging towards the ground far below him.

>>8498390
In retrospect, pressing a random button on a vast machine thoroughly beyond my understanding was probably not a wise decision.

he had but one fear; the use of colons instead of semicolons which results in him looking like an idiot

>>8499010
good one

>He looked at the ruler in disbelief.

>>8498858
Seems like he dumped her EXACTLY when she went missing, so after she disappeared.
It's confusing.

>>8503661
>his dick was only 8.3cm

>This is from a shot story I started this morning.

Watching it from afar, childhood always seems like a simpler time. It isn't.

>>8503671
>so why on earth would his eyes fall on the 28 centimeter mark?

>>8503682
he got raped didnt he

>>8498390

The Codsells lived on a fruitless farm only forty minutes away from the city.

>>8503701
The Bananasells lived on a fishless island only forty minutes away from the mainland.

>>8503694
No, im actually tryin my hand with some light hearted slice of life.
A bully simply tries to steal the MC friend's first mobile phnoe (it's set in the 90s), and the MC refuse to hand it to him. He then got punched in the face, or possibly kicked in the head by the bully but because of the rush of adrenaline he cant actually remeber how things went. However in the end he still has the phone and the bully is gone. It's titled "The first time I got punched, I was probably actually kicked"

>>8501122

>>8503721
Sounds cute.

>>8498390
>Empty, empty, empty, it was all empty.

>>8499267
*Fartman

>>8498390
wtf I hate joyce now

>"you know, it's such a shame that Carol is not remembered for his accomplishments in the fields of mathematics and photography."

>>8498390
>Hey lass, do you want to hear a spooky story?

>>8503706
I like that

It was the third of July and the bananas were polycurdling.

>>8498390

>"As the Raven caw'd on pine, the man ejaculated in to the toilet, and they both stared at each other through the window."

One of my father's many quirks was using verbs in imperative that most people didn't. We were standing on the shore on the opposite side of the nude beach. He handed me the binoculars.
"View lad!"

>>8498390
>>8504794>>8504791>>8504800>>8504801>>8504803>>8504806 (You)>>8504807>>8504819>>8504821>>8504824>>8504828>8504828>>8504833 (You)>>8504850>>8504859>>8504862>>8504863 (You)>>8504865>>8504866 (You)>>8504869>>8504871>>8504875 (You)>>8504882 (You)>>8504888>>8504891 (You)>>8504899 (You)>8504900>>8504907>>8504909 (You)>>8504914>>8504915>8504920>>8504925 (You)>>8504932>>8504950 (You)>>8504748>>8504753>>8504754>>8504756 (You)>>850476>>8504769 (You)>>8504772>>8504776 (You)>>8504779>>8504783 (You)>>8504786>>8504787 (You)>>8504794>>8504791>>8504800>>8504801 (You)>>8504803>>8504806 (You)>>8504807>>8504819>>8504821>>8504824>>8504828>8504828>>8504833 (You)>>8504850>>8504859>>8504862>>8504863 (You)>>8504865>>8504866 (You)>>8504869>>8504871>>8504875 (You)>>8504882 (You)>>8504888>>8504891 (You)>>8504899 (You)>>8504900>8504907>>8504909 (You)>>8504914>>8504915>>8504920>>8504925 (You)>>8504932>>8504950 (You)>>8504748>>8504753>>8504754>>8504756 (You)>>8504765>>8504769 (You)>>8504772>>8504776 (You)>>8504779>>8504783 (You)>>8504786>>8504787 (You)>>8504794>>8504791>>8504800>>8504801>>8504803>>8504806 (You)>>8504807>>8504819>>8504821>>8504824>>8504828>8504828>>8504833 (You)>>8504850>>8504859>>8504862>>8504863 (You)>>8504865>>8504866 (You)>>8504869>>8504871>>8504875 (You)>8504882>>8504888>>8504891 (You)>>8504899 (You)>8504900>>8504907>>8504909 (You)>>8504914>>8504915>>8504920>>8504925 (You)>>8504932>>8504950 (You)

>>8504794>>8504791>>8504800>>8504801>>8504803>>8504806 (You)>>8504807>>8504819>>8504821>>8504824>>8504828>8504828>>8504833 (You)>>8504850>>8504859>>8504862>>8504863 (You)>>8504865>>8504866 (You)>>8504869>>8504871>>8504875 (You)>>8504882 (You)>>8504888>>8504891 (You)>>8504899 (You)>8504900>>8504907>>8504909 (You)>>8504914>>8504915>8504920>>8504925 (You)>>8504932>>8504950 (You)>>8504748>>8504753>>8504754>>8504756 (You)>>850476>>8504769 (You)>>8504772>>8504776 (You)>>8504779>>8504783 (You)>>8504786>>8504787 (You)>>8504794>>8504791>>8504800>>8504801 (You)>>8504803>>8504806 (You)>>8504807>>8504819>>8504821>>8504824>>8504828>8504828>>8504833 (You)>>8504850>>8504859>>8504862>>8504863 (You)>>8504865>>8504866 (You)>>8504869>>8504871>>8504875 (You)>>8504882 (You)>>8504888>>8504891 (You)>>8504899 (You)>>8504900>8504907>>8504909 (You)>>8504914>>8504915>>8504920>>8504925 (You)>>8504932>>8504950 (You)>>8504748>>8504753>>8504754>>8504756 (You)>>8504765>>8504769 (You)>>8504772>>8504776 (You)>>8504779>>8504783 (You)>>8504786>>8504787 (You)>>8504794>>8504791>>8504800>>8504801>>8504803>>8504806 (You)>>8504807>>8504819>>8504821>>8504824>>8504828>8504828>>8504833 (You)>>8504850>>8504859>>8504862>>8504863 (You)>>8504865>>8504866 (You)>>8504869>>8504871>>8504875 (You)>8504882>>8504888>>8504891 (You)>>8504899 (You)>8504900>>8504907>>8504909 (You)>>8504914>>8504915>>8504920>>8504925 (You)>>8504932>>8504950 (You)

WOWO BOYO

>>8505050
>505050
checkd and kekd

The computer was self aware and so was Kenneth of the fact that the computer was self aware but was he aware at the fact that the self aware computer was aware that Kenneth was self aware.

>>8498390
>>8505118 (You)
>>>8505111 (You)
>WWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!>>8505111 (You)
>>>8505107
>>>8505110 (You)
>>>8505106
>>Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:39:51 No.8505104 ▶
>>>>8505098
>>>>>8505094
>>>>>>8504748
>>>>>>8504753
>>>>>>8504754 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504756 (You)
>>>>>>8504762 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504765 (You)
>>>>>>8504769 (You)
>>>>>>8504772 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504776 (You)
>>>>>>8504779
>>>>>>8504783 (You)
>>>>>>8504786 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504787 (You)
>>>>>>8504791
>>>>>>8504794 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504800
>>>>>>8504801 (You)
>>>>>>8504985 (You)
>>>>>>8504986
>>>>>>8504989
>>>>>>8504990 (You)
>>>>>>8504995
>>>>>>8504996 (You)
>>>>>>8504997
>>>>>>8504999
>>>>>>8505003 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505008
>>>>>>8505013 (You)
>>>>>>8505019 (You)
>>>>>>8505022
>>>>>>8505026 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505027 (You)
>>>>>>8505029 (You)
>>>>>>8505033 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505037 (You)
>>>>>>8505042
>>>>>>8505054
>>>>>>8505063 (You)
>>>>>>8505068 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505074
>>>>>>8505086 (You) (You)
>>>>WOW
>>>BOYO
>>WOWBOYO
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:40:43 No.8505106 ▶
>>This thread is like the fragmented self referencing of the suicidal mind right before the end
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:40:47 No.8505107 ▶>>8505110 (You) >>8505111 (You) >>8505113 (You)
>>idk guys, I'm the one who allegedly triggered him
>>I suggested that this guy should kill himself because he was insensitive >>8503982 (You)
>>(obviously it was a joke, I mean cmon, right, this is fucking 4chan and all)
>>but now I'm literally speechless
>>I don't know what the fuck he's even trying to tell me, that I was being too insensitive myself, (You)>>8504871 (You)>>8504875 (You) (You) (You)<span class="deadlink">>>8504882 (You) (You) (You)>>8504888>>8504891 (You) (You) (You)>>8504899 (You) (You) (You)>>8504900 (You)>8504907>>8504909 (You) >>8505107[/spoiler]
>>)
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:42:04 No.8505111 ▶
>>>>8505107
>>>idk guys, I'm the one who allegedly triggered him
>>>I suggested that this guy should kill himself because he was insensitive >>8503982 (You) (You)
>>>(obviously it was a joke, I mean cmon, right, this is fucking 4chan and all)
>>>but now I'm literally speechless
>>>I don't know what the fuck he's even trying to tell me, that I was being too insensitive myself, or that I was being too much of a SJW edgelord, or if he is or isn't that same guy
>>>whatever the situation, lad, sorry again if I really did trigger you somehow, and you aren't just meming us cause you're bored
>>WOWBOYO
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:42:53 No.8505113 ▶
>>>>8505107
>>boyoladwewwow
WOWBOYOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

>He had but one fear; WOWBOYO

>>8498390
>There's little a sleeping person can do agains't even the smallest predator, and unfortunely when the young man, a boy full of hopes and dreams, opened his eyes to look at the beast that opened his troath with it's teeth and his chest with it's claws, it was already too late, the beast had ravaged it's body and made him unrecognizable, and when his friends woke in the morny to see what had happened with their dear friend, all the found was skin, bones, and a small amount of meat.
It's shitty, i know, i've only started it, and i know the grammar sucks but i'm not american and i'm still learning.

>>8498390
You have been banned from all boards for posting >>8505087, a violation of Global Rule 3:

You will not post any of the following outside of /b/: Trolls, flames, racism, off-topic replies, uncalled for catchphrases, macro image replies, indecipherable text (example: "lol u tk him 2da bar|?"), anthropomorphic ("furry") or grotesque ("guro") images, post number GETs ("dubs"), or loli/shota pornography.

Your ban was filed on September 13th, 2016 and expires on September 14th, 2016 at 16:39 ET, which is 23 hours and 59 minutes from now.

According to our server, your IP is: 106.68.250.82. The name you were posting with was Anonymous.

Because of the short length of your ban, you may not appeal it. Please check back when your ban has expired.


You have also been banned from all boards for posting >>8505085, a violation of Global Rule 10:

Spamming/flooding.

Your ban was filed on September 13th, 2016 and expires on September 16th, 2016 at 16:39 ET, which is 2 days and 23 hours from now.

According to our server, your IP is: 106.68.250.82. The name you were posting with was Anonymous.

Because of the short length of your ban, you may not appeal it. Please check back when your ban has expired.

You have been banned from all boards for posting >>8505133, a violation of Global Rule 10:

Spamming/flooding.

Your ban was filed on September 13th, 2016 and expires on September 16th, 2016 at 16:50 ET, which is 2 days and 23 hours from now.

According to our server, your IP is: 203.59.168.228. The name you were posting with was Anonymous.

Because of the short length of your ban, you may not appeal it. Please check back when your ban has expired.


WOW BOYO!

>>8505050
This is really good. Would read.

He had no one to fear; but God.; himself.
He. was born on a dark;, gloomy;, and rainy night. He's was born gloomly, darkly and rainly.
Ibuprofen.

>>8505200
>>8505118 (You)
>>>8505111 (You)
>WWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!>>8505111 (You)
>>>8505107
>>>8505110 (You)
>>>8505106
>>Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:39:51 No.8505104 ▶
>>>>8505098
>>>>>8505094
>>>>>>8504748
>>>>>>8504753
>>>>>>8504754 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504756 (You)
>>>>>>8504762 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504765 (You)
>>>>>>8504769 (You)
>>>>>>8504772 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504776 (You)
>>>>>>8504779
>>>>>>8504783 (You)
>>>>>>8504786 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504787 (You)
>>>>>>8504791
>>>>>>8504794 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8504800
>>>>>>8504801 (You)
>>>>>>8504985 (You)
>>>>>>8504986
>>>>>>8504989
>>>>>>8504990 (You)
>>>>>>8504995
>>>>>>8504996 (You)
>>>>>>8504997
>>>>>>8504999
>>>>>>8505003 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505008
>>>>>>8505013 (You)
>>>>>>8505019 (You)
>>>>>>8505022
>>>>>>8505026 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505027 (You)
>>>>>>8505029 (You)
>>>>>>8505033 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505037 (You)
>>>>>>8505042
>>>>>>8505054
>>>>>>8505063 (You)
>>>>>>8505068 (You) (You)
>>>>>>8505074
>>>>>>8505086 (You) (You)
>>>>WOW
>>>BOYO
>>WOWBOYO
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:40:43 No.8505106 ▶
>>This thread is like the fragmented self referencing of the suicidal mind right before the end
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:40:47 No.8505107 ▶>>8505110 (You) >>8505111 (You) <span class="deadlink">>>8505113 (You)[/spoiler]
>>idk guys, I'm the one who allegedly triggered him
>>I suggested that this guy should kill himself because he was insensitive >>8503982 (You)
>>(obviously it was a joke, I mean cmon, right, this is fucking 4chan and all)
>>but now I'm literally speechless
>>I don't know what the fuck he's even trying to tell me, that I was being too insensitive myself, (You)>>8504871 (You)>>8504875 (You) (You) (You)<span class="deadlink">>>8504882 (You) (You) (You)>>8504888>>8504891 (You) (You) (You)>>8504899 (You) (You) (You)>>8504900 (You)>8504907>>8504909 (You) >>8505107[/spoiler]
>>)
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:42:04 No.8505111 ▶
>>>>8505107
>>>idk guys, I'm the one who allegedly triggered him
>>>I suggested that this guy should kill himself because he was insensitive >>8503982 (You) (You)
>>>(obviously it was a joke, I mean cmon, right, this is fucking 4chan and all)
>>>but now I'm literally speechless
>>>I don't know what the fuck he's even trying to tell me, that I was being too insensitive myself, or that I was being too much of a SJW edgelord, or if he is or isn't that same guy
>>>whatever the situation, lad, sorry again if I really did trigger you somehow, and you aren't just meming us cause you're bored
>>WOWBOYO
>>>>
>> Anonymous 09/14/16(Wed)04:42:53 No.8505113 ▶
>>>>8505107
>>boyoladwewwow
WOWBOYOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

>>8498689
kek

>>8498390
>Here I am, within the first hour of my morning, spending finite resources on a St. Lucian 19th century literary lifestyle cosplaying irc channel with a pizza roll on my lap when one user in particular spectacularly announces the opening line of his new short story, this reading "He had but one fear; himself" - fortune favors me today as my wastepaper basket is within reach, it soon subjected to the full extent of those half frozen tendies I ate last night (I just couldn't wait!)

He had only one god; two if you counted Fear.

>Do you ever get that feeling of Deja-vu?

>He had but one secret name; David Duke.

>>8506689
what did he mean by this ?

>>8501122
Sleep Patterns is my go to song for making others leave me alone

>>8506680
>>8498914

Your opening sentence is nothing bar the manifestation of the ideal beauty. I just don't know how God himself didn't think of it as an opening line for the bible! Listen I'm a real hardass with my criticism; but trust me I orgasimed thrice while reading it. It made me think good, feel good, and get over my abortion.
The prose is on par with Stephen King's, dare I say, and it really just gets the reader hella hooked! The buildup is already there, and it's FABULOUS! You should definitely finish this and publish it. I'm happy to critique more, and I'm nothing but objective. I'll personally edit it if you allow me. You know you can just come to my apartment, I'm currently living alone so there's an empty room. I guess I can take you in as my personal little boipuspus fucktoy haha! Pls send more.

>>8506689
>CHEERS LUV

>>8498390

Last night, the sea came to my door.

A voice pierced the snowfall-; inviting and motherly - it's warmness diminishing in the echoes, as i sat in the frozen ground, a child, eating fresh powder snow.

>>8506926
>I can take you in as my personal little boipuspus fucktoy haha
ASL?

>>8498904
;;;;;;;;;;

>>8500552
Strike snow, rain and sleet, for starters

Something I wrote when I was 17. How retarded does it sound?
>Elise wasn't the first girl that I loved but she was an easy fuck and dropped her cigarette butts into the sinks in small, dirty bathrooms even though there were always ashtrays around her (and I happily would have put them out with my bare hands just to smell the remaining fragrance of her saliva).

>>8508133
If the ideology of 4chan was also the zeitgeist, this is how John Green would write.

>>8498390

"After all, what is power but an illiusion we all agree upon."

>>8508144
yeah I was kind of a faggot. was more of a try to rip off Carver with shitty sentence structure though

in broken google trad :


> This happened in a small village in the South of France as there are dozens and dozens of others between Avignon to Digne-les-Bains. From living memory , no spectacular event of major historical importance had ever happened there, and for the killing that is the source ; or the root of the story , he had , without going into details , no equivalent since the public execution of the resistant Lucien Espérandieu right next to the town hall, during the winter of 1943 .

>The abandoned butchery was old, decrepit, and rife with the peril of accidental death.

He had had one fear; had he of counted himself, he'd of had two.

>>8498390
I feel cold, unfrozen and filled with pain.

>>8498984
Impressive

They opened her up in June.

>>8499025
underrated

There is fear and there is man. And i am what man fears.

>>8509505
This isn't actually too awful, and might be decent if it were attached to the right context.

It was a friday afternoon when i awoke and remembered my destiny. A destiny that had been drowned in the fog of digital stimulus, in the swamp of daily life. Sinking, Sinking, Sinking. It was only a dream, which cleared my senses, gave me fresh air to breath, made me see, made me hear. Yes, in this dream i saw my destiny, my enemy. In my dream... i saw god.

It was only after acquiring everything that he realized he desired nothing.

This is the tale of young man. A tale of war, of despair, of terror and loss. A tale of heaven and hell. Of Life and Death. This is a tale about a young man called Jason De La Rue. It is a tale about a man, in war with himself.

"Yet another day passed. And nothing happened. When will i finally overcome my passivity? When will i finally commit to my dreams and start writing this story that i have dreamed of all my life? Yet another day wasted with easy distractions, driven away from myself by my anxiety. I'm such a loser." Jason said nonchalantly to nobody while pacing through his single-room apartment in Manhatten.

Sometimes the best things sprout from the worst things. In my case, it was the opposite way. Never would i have guessed that my first love would have led me here. Here, that is 2000 miles into the gobi desert. Alone without any water, i stumble towards my own death. I can see things. I can see her. But you probably wonder how i ended up here...

Life's not so bad when you ignore it. Hi, my name is Frank Panchali, and this is my story.

>>8509518
dont you think you should make this something the reader should take away from the story instead of blatantly stating it at the beginning?

not hating, just wondering why you would start a story with that.

>>8509531

I entered the apartment where i was told the party would be and then a girl came up to me and said Hi and i said Hi too and then she looked at my face for 2 seconds and then after the 2 seconds had passed she turned around with unmoving eyes and went away. I started walking in a middle-slow pace past people and furniture, sometimes nodding as if proving to others that this party was sufficiently enjoyable as to not make me regret having come here and sometimes i said "excuse" because people blocked my path. And then I went on the balcony which had no furniture on it but there were cigarette stubs on the floor everywhere and I thought to myself Nobody will clean this up i'm sure and I thought about throwing them all down towards the busy street below where it would maybe hit a group of people on the head who would then start to make shocked and disgusted noises and maybe some excessively vigorous male would shout at the balcony and insult it but he would not see me and the group would move on. I was alone but then the same girl who greeted me joined me and was silent for 3 seconds and then asked me who I was and I said I am Jules and she nodded and asked me if I read books and then I said yeah and asked What kind of books do you like I hate genre fiction. And she says that she likes tolstoy more than dostoyevski and say I get it and nod. And then I think and she stares at the building on the other side of the street were all the lights were out and no man stared at us from the windows but a bird was walking on the roof and then flew away to another building. And then I said I think I like Dostoyevski more than Tolstoi but i think it's reasonable that a woman likes Tolstoi more I think. And she nodded and said Yeah but I also know a lot of girls who like Dostoyevski more because his novels are very passionate I guess. And i say Yeah but Tolstois are too. I guess it's all about taste and we stare at the ground. And i ask her Who are you and she says she has seen me at the University a couple of times, sitting there with my headphones and reading and I nodded and then said yeah I saw you looking at me but who are you. And she says her name is Lucy and i nod and then say I don't like Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds even though I have to confess I do like The Beatles. And she says she doesn't have an opinion on the beatles and then excuses herself and goes to the bathroom. In the opposite building a light was turned on but i didn't see anybody. I tried to find the moon but he wasn't there. Lucy doesn't come back after 4 minutes and I leave the balcony and go inside and go to the living room where they are playing Talking Head on very loud boxes and i sit down and observe people while talking to myself in my head.

>>8500101
first words made me feel like it was going to be bad but i kekked in the end

The sky is cold and Japanese outside my window this evening and the roofs and houses too and that’s a lie ‘cause I’ve never even seen Tokyo or Okinawa or wherever I just read a shitton of manga.

Wrote it two years ago then aborted the project, picking it up again soon.

It's an epigraph to my novel about /mu/:

"L U L Z DX
SUCC
JAJJ
XD

NO U
—Anonmosu"

>>8498390
>Though I never had an explicit appreciation for violence, I have always been driven in favor of men who employ such methods of efficiency to gain desires.

He feared but one man; Mr Poopypants.

He had but one fear; a semi-colonoscopy.

He had but one favorite meme; zero if you counted this one.

He had but one desire; dill doritoes, I think, but he shortened it to "dildos".

>>8498390
He had but one fear;shieeet.

>>8498390
He was there with his intentions.

>>8509804
That almost touched the horizon of greatness

>>8509558
Dont watch too many movies

>>8509531
You are not very good at following instructions .are you ?

>>8509804
>Though I never had an appreciation for violence, I did always like a man who employed such methods to get what he wanted.

FTFY.

The summer was long, an endless haze blurred by inebriation.

I'm the type who enjoys rainy days.

>>8509804
>>8511640
>
FTFY

>>8511650
>The summer was long and I spent it cocked.

FTFY

>>8498390
>He sat there, with a bended cigarette in his mouth, listening as she took her morning piss..

Can someone post the original screencap?

Sometimes an enemy is all one needs. And sometimes two are even better. But in this the number of my enemies was three. So shall it be...

>>8498390
“Quiet, Boy.” I could live three more times never hearing those words, yet I’ll never stop them from bouncing around my head at night and smashing into my brain in the morning.

Have you ever wondered who this one guy is, this loser, who appears on television and makes a fool of himself. I'm that loser. Yup. But let me introduce myself first. My name is Rowlie. Yup. Rowlie....

I was sitting on a bench. The day fading into obtuse darkness. A realm of shadows widening it's borders all across us, conquering light and hope and spreading it's infinite darkness. Her gown fluttered in the wind, a golden glow. Deep, deep regret. Why was i here? Smoke in my eyes. God why have thou forsaken me?

One lucky night can change everything. Today would be my lucky night. I knew it. I just knew it. My father said: If you try your best and belief in yourself you will succeed in everything i do. I believed him. I still do. My heart clenched in sudden sorrow. Follow me into my world. My name is not important. What matters is out there, waiting for me to catch it. Dad.... I love you Dad.

Sit inside m. Watch beneath the coouds. I willl walk with you another 200 metres if that's it. Is that okay? I find me to not be. Single-hand dancing crowds in tutesalem racoveers. I wonder if it's true what joniser had said about a young man who had died while being inextremely pursued by the police from the other side of the city if ou can follow me. THere was a tangible easyness in the flow of the water but i couldn't feel it.

I'm dying of laughter. Fuck you /lit/ for making me laugh at retarded shit like this.

Frank did not desire to be transformed into a young filly experience her first pangs of heat, but the writer as well as the lustful stallion who would quench such newfound flames in her folds with foals had different opinions on the matter. Those opinions won out.

Downtrodden young men stand at the line of the supermarket. The air is uneasy. A dead man hangs from the ceiling, his hands spread like jesuses. Yeah... The Zombie Apocalypse was real... My Mother, more dead, than alive. Almost undead herself... was witing for me outside. She scolded me for taking so long all the time. But what could i do? You can't expect the whole world to be annihilated and just go WAPS Yup everything's alright again. It would need courage, faith, bravery and god. Looking at the poor starving little children around me, who looked apathetic at a world desolated by a mysterious virus... i felt that god would be our biggest problems. If there was a god, then why had this happened to us?

>>8509587
>anime laughing girls2
>2

>Federated Nations of North America
The most important thing to remember about the federal government is that once it acts it does not stop.

>untitled
When it was all said and done, the Ministry of Magic was almost unanimous in their decision to marry the worlds of the magical and the muggle. The decision did not come easy. There were more than a few heated debates and even instances of violence, but with the downfall of Lord Voldemort and the censure of the noble pureblood dynasties, the decision to embrace multi-temporalism was inevitable. After all, the Last Wizard War was fought on the grounds of accepting diversity. How could they shatter thousands of years of hierarchy to enforce inclusion and not join the world at large once the discovery of their world was inevitable and imminent?

>Stay Safe (non fic)
Newark is a big city. It folds in and over on itself like the twisted double helix of DNA. It is an old city with a deep history. After the riots in the late 60s, much of that history was burned to the ground. White Flight and black looters gutted the business districts and turned one of America's oldest and most prized possessions into a simmering war zone. Even now in 2016 there are scars from those horrible events both literal and figurative. Buildings remain hollow and open spaces sprout weeds and broken glass. Over all of it presides the Prudential Banking Empire. Their spotless glass towers stare down on us with lidless eyes. Their private security create cordoned off zones that are well guarded and brightly lit. Their role in the riots and the rape of Newark is a matter of public record, regardless of how much they have tried to bury it.

>The Farm and the Forest
It all started when a crotchety Canadian Goose and his gaggle of ruffians landed in the pond on the edge of the Farm. The pond was divided by the fence, leaving a small portion outside the bounds of the Farm, its bank up against the edge of the Forest. The small flock did not stay long, as a young German Shepherd saw them land. He hollered out to his sister and they both ran pell-mell to the pond, barking loudly and scaring off the foreigners, who flapped wildly up over the fence and into the Forest. As his gaggle spread out warily around the edge of the Forest looking for seeds and bugs, the crotchety goose surveyed the Farm with malice and jealousy in his heart. He wanted to swim in the pond, gorge on the grain, and find some nice farm geese to cavort with.

>The In Between
Consider:

A boy a' bike on road no more. His here and there both distant shores.

Astor. Astor. Astor.

There is a moment, between sleeping and waking, when the light of our world pours into the realms of the dream world and the magic of dreams surges into our reality. This gateway is only ever open for what might be described as a second. In this moment, if one looks with all three eyes, the marriage of the This and the Other is seen as whole.