/lit/ - Literature

>Sticky grape soda stains my fingers; they make it with real sugar here and the smell of carbohydrates

Dear God...

>>758533
Again, if you mean "Dear God, this is bad." I would really love for you to explain why. It doesn't help anyone to just make an incredibly vague comment on the first half of the opening sentence of my piece.

>>758545

It's actually very helpful, it means "never write again".

>>758527

"w" + "b" - "b" + "w" + "u" - "u" + "w" + "b" - "b" + "." + "s" - "s" + "a" + "h" - "h" + "n" + "h" - "h" + "o" + "b" - "b" + "n" + "c" - "c" + "t" + "b" - "b" + "a" + "s" - "s" + "l" + "d" - "d" + "k" + "a" - "a" + "." + "t" - "t" + "s" + "i" - "i" + "e" + "o" - "o"

>Sticky grape soda stains my fingers; they make it with real sugar here and the smell of carbohydrates on my hand reminded me of you and I had to stop and look around the dusty diner because I was doing it again.
Were you wearing your running shoes while writing this sentence?

>>758551
I'm not sure how many times a person has to emphasize this to get it across, but, to reiterate: If you have nothing helpful or constructive to say, FUCK. OFF. I'm not here jack off your ego by taking your pointless insults. If you'd like me to even BELIEVE that you found something about this piece unpleasant or less than enjoyable, then point out what it is, and I'd be more than happy to take your criticism seriously. Really, you don't even have to be polite about it; this is the internet, I'm not expecting to be let down nicely.

>>758557
I intended for the beginning to have that quick, somewhat unhinged pace to it, yes, because (I feel) it drops the reader right into the thought processes of the narrator. If you think it was too awkward or too extreme though, toning it down could be a good idea, or just trying to polish it to the point where it reads like a nice slow tumble rather than a forced sprint.

>>758572
This isn't Deviant Art or your personal blog.

/lit/ - literature. Not /lit/ - ramblings of a Grape Soda drinking high school student.

>>758572
The best thing about these insipid "hey critique my writing!" threads is the OP's unwavering inability to handle harsh criticism and/or their tendency to completely disregard it, thereby making such a request pointless from the get-go.

They need to start banning for shit like this. If you don't want to hear mean things then FUCK OFF.

>>758614
I'm not sure how drinking grape soda makes me a high-school student, or how a /lit/ board is, in your estimation, such an OBVIOUSLY unfit place for me to post, you know, fucking LITERATURE.

>>758624
Since you're so convinced I'm just disregarding what must be some very well thought-out or at least pointed criticism, do you think you could elaborate for me on what, as it specifically relates to my piece, this person meant by "Dear god...". You must admit, as far as content goes, I haven't been given much to work with in his response.

>>758625
"Bullshit a child spews through his fingers into an internet posting" and "literature" are not the same thing. You write bad. The quality of your writing is what convinces me that you are a high-school student. I like Grape Soda too.

>>758652
Please, then, what about the quality of my writing? How may it be improved? I'm looking for criticism here, which (and this may surprise you, so try to be calm) involves a little more than just saying "Hey, that's bad." It's not discounted as unliterary because you think it's bad. It's my attempt at literature, and however poor an attempt YOU may think it is, or even it may be, that means that it's acceptable on this board. If you'd like to see better literature posted on this board, you can take a step toward that right now, in a very real and concrete sense: help me improve this piece, or even if you believe it to be unfixable, point out the pitfalls I should be watching for next time--what could be improved about the subject? The themes? The imagery? The word-choice? Anything!

>>758625
Literature is written work that causes people to think, and wish to discuss themes, etc. with other people due to their unified belief that it is somehow worth caring about. It isn't some slop just splattered onto a computer screen by some sticky-fingered neckbeard that is disconnected from society.

There's a fucking reason why discussing Ayn Rand is against the rules here.

Fucking typical. Everyone is happy to pour on the negativity when it's completely unfocused, and to call me out for getting upset at it. But when it becomes clear that I'm NOT just another butthurt little teenager, and you pricks actually have to explain yourselves for the bullshit you spit at everyone, you're silent. Thank you, /lit/.

>>758709
Again, you rant and rave about how my work sucks without EVER discussing what the fuck is wrong with it! So far you have called me: a high-school student, sticky, a neckbeard, someone disconnected from society.
You've INVENTED more specific criticisms of me as a person than you've managed to lay out for the actual piece of writing I posted here. TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS UNLITERARY ABOUT IT, DON'T JUST WHINE ON ABOUT THESE VAGUE FUCKING PROBLEMS YOU HAVE WITH THIS BOARD AND OTHER WRITING THREADS. I want feedback. AND FOR THE UMPTEENTH FUCKING TIME, SOMETHING MORE SPECIFIC THAN JUST TELLING ME IT SUCKS.

>>758732
rage has rage

You don't have the talent to write in the first person. I bet you fucking loved Catcher in the Rye. Fuck you, you talentless asshole.

>>758732
Would you like to hear the themes I had in mind when writing this? Alienation, regret, nostalgia, the awkwardness of emerging sexuality, and I even tried to write some interplay among them. The odd way in which nostalgia mixes with sexuality, the mirrored alienation present in both segments of the narration (both in the present and in his recollection), there's even a (somewhat vague, admittedly) theme of homosexuality/religion written into there. But that's nothing you guys would ever even address, is it? Because you're to busy bitching over and over again about the same vague bullshit.

Punctuation is good. Slightly more (or less, you're kind of in limbo right now as far as prose goes) formal prose couldn't hurt. And what do carbohydrates smell like?
And towards the middle-end, you start to ramble on about nothing. It starts out as shit and ends as shit that no one understands.

>TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS UNLITERARY ABOUT IT,

The fact you're trying to write "literature" about goddamn grape soda? Fuck off to devianart, you twat.

your first two sentences were awkward and strained as fuck, past tense blows for first person and to be quite frank you sound like a neckbeard with a broken heart. Your writing is subpar and uninteresting.
>>758755
>hurrr durr I'm so deep and brooding
your themes were obvious as fuck, you have the subtly of a sledge hammer with the eloquence to match.

>>758755
>alienation
Where? Point to me in the text WHERE the theme of alienation is. I'll accept the others, but SHOW ME alienation.

>>758771

Oops forgot my sage. Also, what the fuck do carbohydrates smell like?

Are you people fucking idiots? Like, can you read? Or are you just so incapable and lazy that you would rather squash literature than try to improve it? Great writers, decent writers, even writers that just don't, as you've reminded me I do SO so many times in this thread, blow ass start off needing improvement. They don't begin as visionaries, you need to develop the skills of writing. And right now, on a board that claims to enjoy and care about literature, you are doing nothing to promote a community where somebody can IMPROVE their writing. I'm not here looking for somebody to stroke my dick and tell me I'm a genius, because I KNOW I'm far from it. I already KNOW there are plenty of people out there who will think my writing sucks, probably the VAST majority of anyone who reads it. I don't need you to tell me that, I don't want you to tell me that. What I am asking for, from you, is for REAL criticism, something that I can take steps toward improving. So sorry if "You're bad at writing" seems a bit too nebulous for me to tackle without some intermediate points of reference.

Let's start here: Why is the first stentence so godawfully long? Why are all the sentences so godawfully long?

>>758776
Dude.
You are on 4CHAN. Go to a critiquing website. There are THOUSANDS on the internet.

>>758773
THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. May I please, in thanks, put my mouth on whatever kind of genitalia you possess?

>>758774
not OP but
>the loss of his bitch
>the endless ostracization and loneliness implied with neckbeardom
he just didnt do a very good job of it

I'll try to give you a constructive response here, although I share the opinion that you really have a lot of practice to do.
>the smell of carbohydrates on my hand
People don't generally go around sniffing carbohydrates. If you want to mention smelling the artificial flavoring or something, fine, but nobody ever actually has an inner narrative saying "Yeah, definitely smells like aromatic rings in here."
>because I was doing it again
Doing what again? Sniffing your fingers? This is a vague statement, and you should always strive for precision when bringing a short story alive for your audience. In short fiction more so than any other genre, you have to make every word count, so there is simply no space for hackneyed tropes like this.
>blandly decorated room
A sentence or so later, you actually show this, so there's no need to tell it here. However, with...
>because it hardly looked like you had changed it since you were young
You will need to create imagery showing this, since I have no idea how the religious icons pertain to youthful characteristics of room decor. Plenty of older women have votive candles, images of Jesus, etc. displayed prominently in their houses. If you want to throw in some My Little Ponies on the shelves, that's fine, but remember that the room is EITHER going to be bland OR full of plaques of saints, but not both.
>overtly religious appointments of propped up plaques about saints and Jesus
This sounds a bit ridiculous, since its basically redundant. Anything which shows a religious figure is going to be, by definition, overtly religious.

I'm having trouble posting the remainder of my criticism, hopefully this one will go through.

>and you were in my mouth
Are you intentionally vague as to the gender of the narrator and their love interest? I assumed the narrator was male and the subject of the paragraph was female, since females are more likely to have the religious icon thing going on. But this phrase makes it sound like our narrator of indeterminate gender is now giving a blowjob, and I'm not sure that's what you meant for it to sound like.
>some sort of, kind of
Find better ways of expressing yourself rather than resorting to these dry stock descriptors. They don't add anything to the narrative and they get kind of frustrating to see kind of repeatedly, kind of.

>>758779
Sure, if you'd really like to.

>>758776
This is a literature board, not a "ramblings of a self-important broken-hearted wannabe writer" board. We aren't here to critique you and your super-deep themes and sad, girlfriend-missing prose.

>>758778
These people suck at reviewing (in my experience) for the same reason that asking your friends for critique is only slightly enlightening in the long term. They candy coat everything they say and pretend to like whatever you write. The motivation is slightly different--friends don't want to hurt your feelings, website reviewers want to get positive (or any) reviews in return from you--but the result is the same: lame reviews. I know you guys are honest here on 4chan, and I know you care/know about literature here on /lit/. It just pisses me off that so few of you are willing to actually expend the effort to help someone trying to create good literature.

>I know you care/know about literature here on /lit/

Half the front page is neckbeard fantasy shit and the other half is this pathetic writing topics.

>>758771
And what do YOU think literature is supposed to be about, you autistic shut-in? Dragons and wizards? Death and political polemic? Who the fuck are you to take a small detail from my story and tell me it's something literature just can't be about?

>>758784
I actually did intend some gender ambiguity for the story; actually, in my mind the narrator IS gay, so if you think there's something I should do to be more clear on that, it's something I've been mulling over.
As far as the dull phrasing goes, that is something I struggle with when writing; I have a tendency to think in stock phrases when I'm feeling lazy, and it likely seeps in; I'll look over this for more trite shit I can clean up. Thanks

>autistic shut-in

I'm sensing some projective butthurt.

Just accept your writing is terrible and don't throw such a temper tantrum. I've seen elementary kids take criticism more maturely than you have.

>>758774
Someone already (somewhat accurately) addressed it, but to elaborate: the narrator, as he sits in the diner, is apparently in a situation of social consciousness (he has to look around the diner to remind himself of his surroundings, so as not to embarrass himself) yet, throughout the story, he is isolated; only interacting with or even mentioning one person, who, in the context of the story's real time-frame is little more than a fantastic recollection. Even in this fantasy, the remembered surroundings melt away. He's alienated from the bland world, both in reality and in his fantasy. His true joys lie very very close to his person; the taste of jizz, the person with whom he shares this memory, the stain of soda on his skin. The rest is an unfortunate and intrusive backdrop. That's where the alienation comes from.

It's hard to tell you what to improve on. If anyone was going to give you their thoughts on it they would have to break it down sentence by sentence. (Ala >>758781) If you had decent prose and wanted criticism you would get people telling you what they thought about the plot or very rough thoughts on the style, because the thing wouldn't be a cluster fuck of small errors and awkward patches. We can't change how good you are, and we don't want to edit your work for you. A whole great fuckload could be changed.

Also, I think you would get better at writing if you worked on picking apart your work yourself rather than having anyone else doing it. Analyzing your own bullshit and fixing it seems like it would be a key skill for a writer.

AND: Don't get your panties in a bunch because a few faggots who are tired of seeing critique threads decide to tell you to fuck off.

I'll rewrite this biznatch if you'd like OP

>>758836
I'm almost sure this will just be troll bait, but either way, I'd love to see what you think.

>>758841
no troll bait OP, I'm just lazy as fuck, give me a bit or tab this page and come back in 15 minutes.

>>758808
Okay, if the narrator is gay, you don't necessarily have to overtly show it but maybe drop some hints if you want to create that sense of ambiguity. Your readers might want to know how the narrator's lover reconciles his seemingly strong Christianity with his sexual orientation, as well. Maybe not in this particular paragraph, but somewhere in the story you will want to address that. Or, if the images of Jesus and pals are in the room as an ironic or kitschy gesture by the character, or simply as a result of not having changed his room decor since changing his beliefs, show that as well.

meh, this is average but I guess I'm done

The clock ticks absently by as I stare with vacant eyes into ubiquitous monotony of my blank ceiling. One second, two seconds, an eternity of indifference ticks by like the soft autumn rain on my window. Over time my room slowly began to emulate yours. Originally it was a shrine to my own self worth, but in your absence, the aesthetic beauty slowly withered away like the transition from spring to fall. I swear if I cleaned up the sea of soda cans on the floor I could pass for a hip minimalist. You would be proud. I remember your smiling face and the pungent aroma of grape soda that always seemed to waft about you. I remember that although your room was barren, we needed nothing but each other to be content. God it seems like you're still the innocent flower you were when you were twelve and I was nine. Over time you remained unadulterated, entranced, frozen forever in perfect harmony while my world fell about me. It sickens me to think about how far I've fallen.

hopefully you didnt abandon your thread OP

>>758922
OP here; this is decently written, and it was certainly enjoyable. I just don't think it communicates the same things I want my piece to be able to communicate. In fact, it seems like somethings have almost completely flipped around. Rather than speaking to the corruptibility of memories, your piece seems to glorify them, to hold them up as frozen, effectively contextless. As well, it loses that sense of urgency at the beginning, the tumult of being dropped into this specific memory by some passing, trivial detail.

>>758972
You have to remember that the narrator can never be trusted and dont blow your wad before you're done with foreplay boss. It gives you time to create exposition and develop your characters rather than having them set in stone from the very beginning.

>>758972

>He think first person narrators are reliable.

Sticky grape soda clings to my fingers and the sweet, sickly smell of sugar floats into my nostrils like smoke with with the fusty air of this dingy diner. I suck at the purple stains, imagining my ex-boyfriend's sour jism as it ran down my throat, plugged up my nostrils, and dribbled over my chin. The last time your manseed coated my face we were in your room, a child's room, unchanged since you first sprouted a pubic hair. But now it was occupied by a grown, sensual, sexual man, an adult who delighted in fellatio from his submissive, feminine-looking male partner. You were two months my senior, more experienced, more world-wise, but still I felt it was me taking advantage of you. Your walls were uncovered, bare, empty of feeling, of personality, of evidence of your existence. Jesus, the Holy Virgin Mother, The Pope, male and female saints of all kinds peeped out at us from their prayer cards on your desk as we cavorted in ecstasy, our hands wriggling and our bodies writhing, your soft, left-curving, pulsing penis buried deep inside my gagging throat, tickling my tonsils. I gag for real and wake from my reverie, pulling a saliva-wet index finger from my mouth. I'm back in the diner now, but I want to be back in your boring room.

>>759033
thats passable, if you're writing a homo-erotic grocery store novel. There is something to be said about the soft fingers of subtlety, and you completely missed it.

>>759033
>Jesus, the Holy Virgin Mother, The Pope, male and female saints of all kinds peeped out at us from their prayer cards on your desk as we cavorted in ecstasy, our hands wriggling and our bodies writhing, your soft, left-curving, pulsing penis buried deep inside my gagging throat, tickling my tonsils.
This was gorgeous and got me a little hard. Good job on the rewrite, OP, this is a lot better. It looks like /lit/'s constructive criticism is actually helpful sometimes. I'm impressed that you were able to ignore the trolls and make something worth reading based on the few real suggestions you got.

>>759104
High five, bro.

How is sugar a sickly smell?

>>759159
Never heard os "sickly sweet" before?

>>759033
this isn't bad, but it's not great either. it's better than most writing we get here on /lit/ but it still makes a lot of amateur mistakes.

>> Sticky grape soda clings to my fingers and the sweet, sickly smell of sugar floats into my nostrils like smoke with with the fusty air of this dingy diner.

"clings" is the wrong word here. liquid doesn't cling.
don't understand the second half of the sentence, maybe owing to the typos in there. personally, i would just say "and it smells of sickly sweet sugar" or something like that.

>>I suck at the purple stains, imagining my ex-boyfriend's sour jism as it ran down my throat, plugged up my nostrils, and dribbled over my chin.

really dislike the use of "ex-boyfriend" here. i would use a name, or just "his."

>>The last time your manseed coated my face we were in your room, a child's room, unchanged since you first sprouted a pubic hair.

ugh. manseed, really? there is something to be said about the eroticism of an adult having sex in a room that was theirs as a child -- i actually write about it a lot in my own stuff, but this sentence is terribly hamfisted of you. your imagery would benefit from subtlety. that said, i like the part about the pubic hair.

>>But now it was occupied by a grown, sensual, sexual man, an adult who delighted in fellatio from his submissive, feminine-looking male partner.

got some chronology problems going on here. so it's occupied *now*? while the narrator is in the diner? or by "now" do you mean when they were there, having sex, in which case the use of "now" is incorrect?
is "occupied" really the word you're looking for?
your description of the partner is awkward. don't need the "looking" after feminine. don't need "male." and i would use another word instead of "partner."

>> Your walls were uncovered, bare, empty of feeling, of personality, of evidence of your existence.

terribly amateur. put some ands in there.

>>Jesus, the Holy Virgin Mother, The Pope, male and female saints of all kinds peeped out at us from their prayer cards on your desk as we cavorted in ecstasy, our hands wriggling and our bodies writhing, your soft, left-curving, pulsing penis buried deep inside my gagging throat, tickling my tonsils.

chill out with the commas. learn to use them sparingly and correctly. these sorts of faux-artsy run-on lists of sentences are just awful.

>>758922
I liked this a bit more than both OP's but substitute time for clock in the first sentence. Clocks dont tick by, time ticks by.

>>759267
TIme has never ticked. Clocks tick, but don't tick by.

>>759275
>>759267
woah now, I wrote that in literally 14 minutes, cut me some slack.

The clock could technically be an implied reference to the passage of time and as the clock ticks by, so does time but now its painfully obvious I'm pulling this all out of my ass.

>>759291
Why defend something you wrote in 14 minutes from one lousy criticism? It's an anonymous board - there's no reason to do that.

>>759309
Well we all have our own little quirks, that's why writing works the way it does. I really could care less, I just like making elaborate ways to make myself look right when I know I'm wrong.

>>759324
And your quirk is defending your own non-edited quickly written purple prose on the internet? Cool.

If you guys don't want to get mocked, how about writing something worth our time to read. It's one thing asking for a critique of a piece you've worked on and it's another thing entirely to hammer out shit in 10 minutes and expect us to suck your cock about it.

Here's a protip for the OP and anyone else considering writing: your shit sucks. Once you realize this and start dissecting good literature, you might actually improve.

>>759381
which is technically routed in my subconscious fear of rejection, but then that's a tad Freudian for so late at night. That and I cant stand uneven piles of things. If there are 6 things, they must be in 2 piles of 3, 3 piles of 2 or six piles of one.

>>759169

Sugar is just sweet, though, not sickly sweet.

>>759401
too much sugar is though. Imagine eating 3 pounds of gummy worms.

>>759406

>Imagine eating 3 pounds of gummy worms.
>imagine being the fat neckbeard that wrote it

Disgusting.

>>759396
It seems we need to have a chat.

>>759406

Just because you'd get sick doesn't mean the taste is 'sickly'.

It's a bad description. Let it go.

>>759418
only if we both can do a fuckload of blow.

>>759396
>routed
rooted is the word you are looking for.

>>759428
thank you merciful grammar nazi.

>>759434

>grammar nazi - WRONG
>grammar-jew - RIGHT

Get with the times.

>>759434
Improving /lit/'s vocabulary, one word at a time.

>>759441
I'm sorry, it seems I'm very poorly versed in the hip vernacular.

>>759434
>implying my correction had anything to do with grammar

>>759450
>implying misplaced homophone isn't part of grammar

>>759457
>implying route and root are homophones
What sort of whacked-up accent do you have?

>>759533

That would be a standard American accent, though it depends on the context. Route 66 would normally be pronounced like root. Re-route would be pronounced like raut.

>>759533
Canadian I suppose, I would pronounce both as r-ew-t.

>>759543
No, it wouldn't, except in Star Trek: Voyager.

>>758529
>Sticky grape soda stains my fingers; they make it with real sugar here and the smell of carbohydrates on my hand reminded me of you and I had to stop and look around the dusty diner because I was doing it again.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

No, really. My sides fucking hurt.

>>759556

I don't get the reference, but yeah, it would.

>>759563
The revised one's better but still pretty laughable. OP went for the porn angle. >>759033

bump for more constructive criticism

First thing I noticed: you are too in love with commas. There are 14 different punctuation marks in standard english; learn to use them all.

>>760244
Yeah, because everyone wants to read something filled with dozens of semi-colons, amiright?

>>760244
Are you responding to OP or the revised paragraph?

Needs moar punctuation revision.

The whole first sentence has only one correct piece of punctuation (the single full stop and correctly placed capital letters aside). Fix dat shit, re-post, then expect some good criticism. As it is, I'm assuming the rest is as carelessly written as the beginning.

>>759052
>soft fingers of subtlety
You sure took the homo-erotic thing to heart.

>>760253

Was responding to OP, but it applies to the revised as well.

>>760250

Of course not, if that were the case my post would read exactly the same but replace the word comma with semicolon. My point was: vary it, use them all. Differences in sentence structure and punctuation make a story easier to read.

>>760276
If anything, OP needs more commas. His first sentence is such a run-on I got light-headed reading it.

Bmp4gr8juztiz

>>758528

tesdt[www]wdin[.]epic[anon]cucudmber[talk]carrot[.]ddog[se]ludlz2a932f4e08c6824b93a916bbe34a374e

I don't like that you use the word carbohydrates. For me it seems like you are trying to intellectualize the narrator by using it. "Dusty diner" is a worn out cliché imo, but I guess it doesn't matter. I like the way you do that homothing hurr :D and that short memory failure thang, and that pseudo pedophilia thang iz all G dawg COOL STORY BRO

GRAP SODA DOSNT TASTE LIKE PUSSY LOL VIRGIN

Remove the adverbs. Just remove them.
Even if you're flashbacking, there's tense confusion in the first line.
Carbohydrates is a silly word to use.
Other than that it's not bad at all.

>>758526

tesdt[www]wdin[.]epic[anon]cucudmber[talk]carrot[.]ddog[se]ludlz9b3e2a13972dcbf020edc579a05c3908

>>759033
i fucking lol'd

>>759033
guys get a clue, that is not OP, that is someone taking a massive dump on his work, and it is hilarious!

>>758528

tesdt[www]wdin[.]epic[anon]cucudmber[talk]carrot[.]ddog[se]ludlze49616b9232400783a5f58292d167056

>>758527

tesdt[www]wdin[.]epic[anon]cucudmber[talk]carrot[.]ddog[se]ludlzbb2db21a8f59d5efefdf39aeb9caaa59

>>758528

tesdt[www]wdin[.]epic[anon]cucudmber[talk]carrot[.]ddog[se]ludlz2438afbbb669d8646d7450f14bdf1e22

>>759033
>The last time your manseed coated my face we were in your room, a child's room, unchanged since you first sprouted a pubic hair.

>>758526

tesdt[www]wdin[.]epic[anon]cucudmber[talk]carrot[.]ddog[se]ludlzda630aeb566919b76ea9a4add4ed478f

Enough of this OP, copy paste the anal scene already

Are we done here?
If so,

/thread and
LAST WORD

This thread.

>>758529
>It all fell away, and we were on a floating bed in nowhere and you were in my mouth and I had to stop and look around the dusty diner because I was doing it again.

>>760454
I'm kind of hoping that OP comes back to this thread and realizes what has happened here.

>>759252
>ugh. manseed, really? there is something to be said about the eroticism of an adult having sex in a room that was theirs as a child -- i actually write about it a lot in my own stuff, but this sentence is terribly hamfisted of you. your imagery would benefit from subtlety. that said, i like the part about the pubic hair.

lmfao i can't tell who's trolling who

>>760467

Seconded. This thread reminds me of the good old days, when trolls were creative and spontaneous.

Good job, anons.

>>760551
I like that the "rewrite" got more actual criticism than OP did.

>>758526

tesdt[www]wdin[.]epic[anon]cucudmber[talk]carrot[.]ddog[se]ludlzfc1196c0f5f75e70b49d0d6aa4156ec5

>>760566

Ya. That's the crux of the whole thread. Hive mind switch to seriousness once OP was frustrated and alienated. Beautiful.

>>759033
Uncool, dude.

>>761415
That dude is cooler than you could ever conceive of being.

WTF is going on in this thread?