/lit/ - Literature

A woman is going to be impressed by your looks and confidence before they're even remotely interested in your artistic sensibilities. Write for yourself.

>>559905
Actually, let me rephrase. A woman HAS to be impressed by your looks and confidence before they're even remotely interested in your artistic sensibilities.

>>559911
And not a one will be.

Write about nature n'shit.

>>559915
I already get compliments on my appearance from women plenty, but it's more along the lines of "you're cute."
Women only ever act really interested in me when I show some hint of being creative in some way.

try something like this

http://www.freshwaterwriting.com/poems/devinpledwards/sonnet1

Women love sonnets

>>559976
>this page has been temporarily disabled.

Disabled. Like, you are, mentally.

>>559984

Page works on my end, Broseph

Poetry will never get you laid. Being a famous poet might.

>heroic ballads
>blakean
Protip: don't model your poems on the poems people wrote hundreds of years ago.

Sorry to use an image that was already posted today, but this is very relevant.

>>559820

post some poems.

>>560267
With Heaven grinning pale and mad a spear of dreams falls fast
Will ever lovers' destiny be hewn forth from its flag
A field of beating hearts will flee from prisoners adored
For there is call to keep no words as silver teeth are gnawed
Which like the shipboard rats of night will eat what's come before

And who shall stay the savage moon in lieu of all that was
Upon a crest of rising time, its tides to be abhorred
For there is call to sorrow when mice flee to their den
Their dinner has awakened, to lose its eyes once more

>>560491

>>560491
The meter isn't off, admittedly. But it sounds like you randomly chose words to keep the poem metrical, without regarding their meaning. At best, the poem's unfocused and boring, at worse, it is nonsensical.

Seriously.
>A field of beating hearts will flee from prisoners adored
For a love poem, the imagery that this elicits is horrifying.

>>560751
>randomly chose words

It's about the themes of time and especially desperation, so it does have meaning, and no, it's not a love poem.
I was just trying to give an example of my more
>abstract, quasi-Blakean dream poetry
that I'm usually fond of writing.

>>560491
Here's a good example of a common problem with amateur poems posted on the internet:
>For there is call to keep no words as silver teeth are gnawed
Is there someone chewing on teeth here? I mean, is there like a rat nibbling on somebody else's silver teeth? Because that's what that line means. You can't just pick a word that means something in the ballpark of what you're going for.

>>560766
>abstract, quasi-Blakean

This doesn't mean "nonsensical mishmash of random imagery." Read more Blake. You can't just shit on the interpretation of someone who reads your poetry and say, "Wrong! It's about time and desperation! Don't you see it!!!" As the author, it's your job to convey that. If someone doesn't pick it up, it's your fault, not theirs.

You did say you want to move away from this type of poetry, though. Did anyone in this thread give actual advice leading in that direction?

>>560786
I didn't say I wanted to move away from it. In fact, I quite like it.

What I said was that I wanted to write PUA poetry in addition to it. So, yeah.

>>560782
Yes, someone (or something) is chewing on teeth

>>560491
The imagery in this poem jumps from one place to another, describing none in detail, leaving a huge mess of disconnected scenes. Hardly Blakean at all. Choose one scene and stick with it. The same goes for writing sonnets.

Your poem reminds me of this ad:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owGykVbfgUE

Wait, you want to try romantic poetry, but you usually write "quasi-Blakean dream poetry"? Isn't that the same thing?

>>560800
Here's a good book on PUA poetry, OP.

Read everything by Keats while incredibly high on any hallucinogen of your choice.
and also try to maintain an iambic pentameter, it tends to make the entire poem a lot more like a speech, and certainly goes very well with a romantic essence

>>560491

you call this shit romance poetry? i think your perception of romance is very very melancholic. try not to use such dark and deathly imagery.

>>560854
Dark imagery isn't necessarily bad. Poe used it very effectively when it came to romance. It's just that, OP isn't a very good writer.

>>560854
No, he doesn't. This is the stuff he wrote before he realized that poetry was the best way to woo women.

oh ofcourse, i guess while i was writing that, in the back of my mind i recalled a lot of gothic/romance poets. and OP, poetry should not be written to get chicks, if u want pussy then become a salsa dancer or some gay shit like that