/lit/ - Literature

>>5510809
Are you kidding me? /lit/ makes fun of all of the big names and authors whether it be Pinecone, DFW or Bloom. This does not mean that they aren't all riding his dick. Bloom's influence is clear and strong on this board, as it is within the literary community in general.

>>5510829
Nah, dude legitimately had a stroke and is now retarded (possibly always was).

he's the top dog lit critic m8

>>5510835
2/10. Made be google.

>>5510848
b is literally 2 letters over from m, how fucking fat are you?

>>5510851
Right around 0.8 Harold Blooms. So pretty fucking fat.

who replaces him when he dies

>>5510858
Hopefully no one and people can go back to liking things again.

>>5510829
I guess haven't singled out any reverential posts or references to his work.

>>5510847
I would think /lit/ would love his literary criticism. He upsets minorities and exalts standards in literature and reading.

Butthurt feminists/marxists/whatever who can't handle getting called out for their abuse of the art of reading.

The only reason il/lit/erates make fun of Bloom is because Bloom called out DFW on being a shit-tier writer, and il/lit/erates jock ride DFW.

Blood is god-tier critic. No one gets me more inspired to read for the lustres, as he would say.
>be 150
>hate on culture studies\ideologically motivated textual interpretation
>promote reading as a means by which solitary readers can encounter beauty, the sublime, and greatness, while expanding their consciousness
>touch a hot young femanon's leg @ school and be like "fuck that slut"
>...
>profit

>>5510809
Because he's a fat fuck, really.
also, can't take a put down graciously - see >>5510867

Someone please explain the purpose of critics to me.

>>5510969
they get paid to be cynic and express their bad taste through 'critique' on others' work

>>5510858
nabokov

>>5510969
Bloom is a critic of the critics. He fights for the one true canon.

I don't know who this is.

>>5510969
So books can have blurbs on the back.

>>5510858

>>5511026
link to more bloomguy pls

>>5511051

>>5511051
Buy best poems in English lang, Shakespeare: invention of human, and Teh Western Cannon

>>5511026
wow just wow imagine living with this dude. mr smuggity smug

>>5510809
he has no discernible talent.

>>5511026
Fucking 4chin deleting my beautiful Unicode checkboxes.

>[X] Pretentious
>[X] Arrogant
>[X] Wrong
>[] Not told
>[X] Told
>[X] The Adventures and Exploits of the Most Told Gentleman Don Quixotold Relatado
>[X] The Brothers Told
>[X] Gravitold's Rainbow
>[X] Infinite(ly) Told

>>5511051
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mBQ844j_JUo

>>5510809
Is he the hero /lit/ needs?

>>5510809
We don't, he's the best living critic. It's obviously ironic, you must be new.

/lit/ loves bloom

i love him too. everything he says has to be taken with a grain of salt, but he's incredibly entertaining and a good time. his early criticism is really solid too.

Gentle reminder

In the highest and loneliest echelons of literary esteem, Harry, blushing, blooming, much like a flower, takes lunch after a very hard morning of experimenting in new forms of bookbinding, a particular method where semen might be used to hold the pages together, as in his mind it always has done. He imagines the buck-tooth wonder opening his jaws, expecting his mud, following nights; terrible nights of constipation, but instead comes wonderful nacreous film across those dental calamities. While watching from the mezzanine Joyce muses, listening to farts from the other room. But faith, oh faith, that has with the years dwindled to but a prosaic nihilism, that is brought about in no small part by errant parentheticals and sentences upon sentences sprawling serpentine across the page, seems unlikely ever to return to poor Harry B. To his audience upon the world stage, once graced by the giants of his time, whom he so venerated and consecrated in his private canon, his mark, he despaired. The old Black Panther members are dying and in their place weep a sea of bandanas and asians, skinny jeans and beards in every effort to defy causality, who think talent may be bled from noodles and studios, he addressed The Great One presently. “Oh, Northrop! It is a mild, mild Sriracha sauce, and a bagel-looking future. Is this what they thought on such a
day - thought very much such a tragedy as this - our teachers despairing us and our postmodern ramblings? Forty-forty-forty years ago! Forty years of continual verbose diarrhea, of perverse ramblings and shitstorms! Forty years on the pitiless sea of irony [not actually irony]! Forty years has Harold forsaken the peaceful life of ACTUAL literature, for forty years to make war on the horrors of the literary avant-garde. Aye, yes, Northrop, out on those forty years I have not spent three with dignity.

>>5511789
You're a shit writer, fuck off.

>>5511789
>no paragraphs

didn't read

>>5510969
They are a helpful guiding hand for us in appreciating things.

Sometimes, I wish /lit/ would be more German, so it could see the greatness that is Marcel Reich-Ranicki.

>mentally survived the holocaust by reciting Hoffmannsthal and Schiller
>leading German literature critic, but complete autodidact, just finished high-school
>hilarious grumpy asshole
>dead ;_;

>>5511721
>/lit/ loves bloom
Certainly not.

>>5513832

either way /lit/ woud hatefuck his face off

>>5513825
I wonder if he and Bloom were friends...

I don't think anyone has ever loved literature quite as much as Harold Bloom does, and I think he is admirable in that respect.

>>5513835
They must have known of each other, but a quick Google doesn't reveal anything, except reversible platitudes: "Ranicki is the German Bloom" and "Bloom is the American Ranicki"

>>5513842
I wonder if there are equivalents to them in French, Spanish, Italian, Portuguese, Russian, Chinese, Japanese, etc..

>>5510809
because we love him

I want a fat, old, balding Chinese Jew to list off all the best works of Chinese literature down to the present day.

>>5513847
>Harold Broom
lel

>>5513867
Harorudo burūmu

>>5513847

Well, we do have Eco. We used to have Croce too, but he died.

>>5513890
Oh man, is Eco often on Italian TV? I'd love it if he was some kind of Italian public property, the "go to" guy who always gets invited to talk shows when something of the arts is to be discussed.

>>5513867
>>5513875
kek

>>5513811

This. They're pretty much designed for the purpose of guiding the indecisive beta male.

>>5513910
True. An Alpha reader just walks right into the bookstore and buys whatever has the coolest cover.

>>5513894

> is Eco often on Italian TV?

I fucking wish. TV here is nothing but reality shows, whores and politicians.

He obviously is one of the most well read people in the world, as well as people one of the most knowledgeable about literature.

However, I disagree with many things he says, in particular his whole concept of genius.
He throws the term around far too much, and mostly to writers who would never be considered actual geniuses.

I feel there are only a handful of actual 'geniuses', and the rest he considers genius are merely talented.

>>5510809
Because /lit/ plays the "if I'm more critical than everyone else than I'm more elite" game

>>5510969
They used to get paid pretty below average wages to study books in detail and cite influences the average reader wouldn't have noticed.

Now they're the children of middle-class real estate investors who can afford to work for free and generally only review feminist books and books by the children of other middle-class people (see: Zoe Pilger for a recent example)

>>5513811

Isn't anyone qualified to do this, though?

>>5514138
Ironically aren't /lit/ more critical than most?
Excluding the rampant circle jerks that is.

>>5510969
They are comparable to certain gnats that lodge their eggs in the nostrils of the finest horses, which do not, however, retard their speed. We should scarce deign to cast our eyes upon these dregs of literature.

>>5514138
I do believe this comes into play

>>5514245
Well being critical is good, but you can do it too much. /lit/ just doesn't like bloom because he encroaches on /lit/s "we are superior to everything" stance

>>5514388
>implying we are not gods upon this earth

>>5514388
How does he encroach?

>>5511116
>>5511092

Not getting the joke

Literature critics are useless in general.

>>5511026
more of the bloomkid pls

>>5514405
He's openly critical of Harry potter and stuff in a world where seemingly no one can be critical of it. /lit/ users are often the anticulture

>>5514443
Read The Well Wrought Urn.

>>5514457

>>5515762
ayy

>>5515762
>all the spines completely unbroken

fuck this faggot so hard

>>5515762
How is that version of md so small? Huh?

>>5516379
It's very very wide

>>5516391
[ur mom]

>>5510851
>>5510856
10/10

Bloom is awesome

He just puts too much of himself in the critiques

Why do people like Bloom so much?

He doesn't even give numeric scores

Critics are useless because they only do good work if they're passionate and knowledgeable about what they criticize. And if they're passionate and knowledgeable, why the hell can't they produce something that anyone likes?

The only critical opinions I care about are those given by people who've written things I care about. Bloom couldn't write his way out of a warm blanket, why should anyone care what he thinks? Because he's read more books than me? Think about this. He's read a million times more than I have, yet he can't parlay that level of familiarity into just one good novel. This should be a huge red flag that this guy doesn't know dogshit about what makes a book good.

>>5511051
>>5514457

Ask and you shall receive, dear readers.

>>5517096

>>5517107
god what a cunt

>>5510809
I don't like Bloom because I don't like his face.

>>5517305

>>5515762
>Step 1: Stack books
>Step 2: Brew coffee
>Step 3: ??????????
>Step 4: Something definitely smells like shit.

>>5514234
No. Someone who is an expert in a given field is obviously more qualified than any other.

>>5517041
He does say which things are better than others, which is close enough.

>>5517093
Literary criticism is itself literature, as Bloom would claim. He in fact does literary criticism of criticism itself, at times. It doesn't matter that he can't write a novel or a poem. Many poets can't write novels, and vice versa. So, why should a literary critic have to write a novel?

/lit/ will hate anyone mainstream, blah bah, blah, moral cowardice in taking a position except those few that said the truth.

He is polarizing on a lot of things like criticism of contemporary culture and writers, but his contribution in literary criticism has been immense and beneficial.

People rarely take their childish and sensitive egos out of the equation.


Blah blah blah Faggotry blah ball watermelons.

>>5518508

>Blah blah blah Faggotry blah ball watermelons.

I can't tell if you're edgy, underage, or both.

>>5510969
They're artists, that's like asking the purpose of writers, musicians, painters, etc.

>>5518508
>Blah blah blah Faggotry blah ball watermelons.

This, but unironically.

>>5518592
No shit man?

>>5510809
Because we want to be him. Same reason we razz on Pinchy, Chokey, and Narcissist.

>>5510969
To let us know whether something is worth giving time to, usually.
Also, criticism is an art in itself.

>>5518626
>Also, criticism is an art in itself.
Finally, I can't believe that it took this long for someone else to say this, but of fucking course /lit/ is filled with plebs.

Could someone please post the list that Bloom made of all the authors and how they fit into some kind of weird Kabbalic schema he invented?

>>5518628
I'm a pleb too.
I mean I'm reading Moby Dick and Thus Spoke Zarathustra, but if I told you I understood TSZ I'd be lying. I'm mostly reading it because the chapters are like the perfect length to read on the john.

>>5511026
Unfamiliar with this guy. Can someone explain? He has all the /lit/ canon meme books covered.

>>5511026
What are the purple one and the orange one?

>>5518641
Man do I weep for you as a retarded person. You haven't read a single of those books because lel memz xp right?

>>5518654
Fuck off, I refuse to read "literary fiction", the "classics", and philosophy because of all the pretentious tryhards that surround it.

>>5518657
4/10

>>5518661
Pretentious teenager detected

>>5518663
Quote this one too

>>5518630
It was just an organizational gimmick for his book, which doesn't actually have anything to do with Kabbalah

>>5518657
le pleb face xd

>>5518695
Oh.
I still kinda wanna see it again, I didn't save it.

>>5518698
Here you go, lazyass

>>5518705
Thanks, doormat.

>>5518712
You're welcome, ingrate.

>>5518705
>Percy Shelly still female

lol they need to fix that

ON TOPIC: Bloom is based and everyone here knows it

>>5518732
The picture is from two years ago so I doubt whoever originally made it will bother

>spend all your career fighting institutionalized faggotry and self-proposed avant-garde in light of true beauty and tradition

Why wouldn't I love this guy?