/lit/ - Literature

>>5106762
Is that actually true?
I write a bunch but I never used it to get laid.

Girls are notorious for sleeping with guys in the same way that guys are notorious for sleeping with girls. Human beings having sex with other human beings is not something that you need to seek detailed socio-cultural explanations for. You big weirdo, you.

That's a pretty sexy post, Sunhawk. My panties are wet already.

Lib arts chicks like if you subtly sperg out a little. Like, needlessly include a word their mom would have to look up but they wouldn't in your faggy one-liner opening. At least that's been my experience.

But OP, I am not lesbian.

>>5106787
Post your dirty insoles

bump

god men who write kinda weird me out because i'm all "yeah man this is good or w/e" and then they're like "want to come over and edit" and i'm like "no i'm writing a masterpiece seeya

even if their writing is really well done i just can't get over this idea of being around a guy who wants me naked in bed just to write about it later (it would be written about later)

>>5106787
post ur hickeys

Sunhawk thinking up more ways to finally touch a girl.

>>5106769
Nobody answered this question

>>5108961
read all of the posts man

>>5108857

>>5106771
pics or it didn't happen

>>5106762
In my experience it's the other way around. After you've sexed a girl you have a proper audience for your writings. Most girl (most people really) aren't gonna listen to your crazy ramblings instead they find you attractive/care about you.

i slept with a girl in my english class once who liked my stories. there was another girl who saw me do stand up comedy and then pretty aggressively pursued me. also, don't make generalizations about girls.

>>5108857
i always write way more about the girls who don't fuck me than about the ones who do (not saying you should fuck those guys)

>>5109035
>i slept with a girl in my english class once

Didn't the teacher say anything?

>>5109050
hehehhehehehehehhehehe

>>5109050
he told us to stop having intercourse on his desk so i came on his tie and he cried and ran away

>>5109035
>i always write way more about the girls who don't fuck me than about the ones who do

That's some white knight, masochistic, the-one-who-got-away-and-her-seventeen-compatriots bullshit. Find a girl you'd write a dozen books about, get to know her, fuck her, love her, marry her, and make her happy. She'll do the same to you.

>>5109079
k thx i'll do that

>>5109079
>dat hollywood prescriptivism

can't you just let anon write about whatever he pleases ? Also, you know he's gay, don't pretend otherwise.

will someone please photoshop a huge cock and balls onto that hawk

>>5109079
Oh man such good advice WHY DID I NOT THINK OF IT???

>>5109079

>That's some white knight, masochistic, the-one-who-got-away-and-her-seventeen-compatriots bullshit.

you should've just left it at that. the part after makes you sound like an overbearing prick.

I was talking to this girl in my poetry class. I told her I liked her and wanted to date her. She agreed and so we planned to go out that Friday. I picked out this awesome Italian restaurant just down the street from the university (mainly because I had some coupons). The date started off great. We got along great and she laughed at all of my jokes. The food was magnificent. Things started to go bad though when I started to stutter and spilled my spaghetti all over my shoes. Luckily the waiter said he'd get me a new plate of food on the house, but I was still pretty embarrassed.

The next wrong thing I did was try to pay for her check. She was one of those women who like to be independent, but I insisted saying it would be my treat. We got into a little bit of a squabble. I don't know I've never really been good at confrontations so I ended up just letting her pay.

After that, I tried walking her home. I heard walking puts people in good moods. We started talking about careers. She asked me what I saw myself doing in ten years. I guess that's when things really started to turn south I told her I really wanted to publish a book of poetry one day, but I right now my poems were mainly just scribbles in composition notebooks. She thought the poetry thing was kind of cool, but she also mentioned she was a little ad-verse to the idea. She said that she really wanted stability in her life and that wasn't the kind of thing you have as a poet. I was a little distraught but I didn't let it get me down too much. We stopped at her house and I told her I'd write her poem one day. I asked her if she'd want to go out again next week too, but her response was, "Sorry kid, can't stanza."

>>5109214
That was beyond terrible

>>5108857
I'm definitely not going to argue the
>wants me naked in bed
but I'll argue that not every guy would want to write about it.

>>5109214
Chaotic evil.
Oh mon dieu, pauvre gosse

>>5109266
C'est triste. Je sais.

I've never had sex, personally.

I told a woman I'd write her a poem to make up for something I forgot. Poem was about societal vs self-identity, I think I only made one copy. We'd been talking for a good while, but it was the first date.

I like to think it helped get me laid, she says it's on her mantel.

>>5109319
>all of /lit/

>>5109326
um I'm pretty sure all of /lit/ has lots of sex and does lots of coke with pretty / smart girls / guys while they're living in New York / working on their MFAs / working on their creative writing undergrade degrees / working in their deadend jobs

>>5109319
>>5109326

samefag

>>5106762
Does sexting count? If so, yes.

>tfw you sext her so well she jills before you get home and then goes to sleep, leaving you blue-balled

i used to send essays back and forth for proofreading/editing with a girl i had a crush on from one of my philosophy classes, we went out and kissed a few times but life always seemed to get in the way so we restricted ourselves to philosophical intercourse via email, lost touch eventually but it was nice while it lasted

i also used to keep a journal of dreams and thoughts and trip reports and angsty poetry that i was rather embarrassed about all throughout high school and into college and i made the mistake of mentioning it in passing to my first girlfriend once and she proceeded to sneakily find it and read it when i went out later that same day... strangely she seemed quite unduly impressed, insisted that one day i'd be a famous writer, even bought me a fancy leather journal to replace my old one that christmas because, as she put it, i would need more space eventually... didn't think much of it till i broke up with her later and i rather unfortunately made a fool of myself on psychedelics due to some heavy realizations about personal issues like my inability to love and my narcissism and my core shallowness which contradicts my desire to be deep and intellectual and where i am going with this? oh ya, we broke up and i left some crazy fucking messages on her answering machine because i missed her and i wanted to be good and find absolution with her and there was some strange christian eschatology stuff happening in my brain and it was awful and she was clearly ignoring my phonecalls and so in a moment of clarity i decided to appropriate the journal she had given me as a secret weapon against her and poured my absolute heart and soul into it and sent it in the mail to her so she could read it -- the tactic was successful and she came over to return the journal to me and we talked and cried and had the best ever sex but actually i was a terrible person and had gotten a new girlfriend during this time period and she was super pretty and snorted coke and molly with me which made her seem a lot cooler than this straight-edge ho who already shamed me once so i kicked the ex out after the sex and didn't think much of it until several months later when i was having some troubles with this new girlfriend and she brought up the journal that she had evidently found and apparently, unbeknownst to me, my ex had written some beautiful lines of poetry of her own as a sort of response to mine and the new girlfriend was all like i know you still love her and you cheated on me cause you think i'm a dumb cumdumpster and i'm not as smart as [ex] blah blah blah so the writing was a double-edged sword i guess, maybe i shoulda been more careful

after that i was single and depressed and started writing more prolifically and went boocoo dinky dau and was a bum and slept with randos and got arrested and sent to a psych ward and burned my journals and laptop and have forsworn sex, drugs and writing ever since

(kant rite ether no moar kuz skitzo maeks u stoopid)

I write poems and I got a gf who's into the idea of her being my muse, except she isn't

>>5106762
Stop harassing the women in the bookshop, Sunhawk. Also kill yourself.

>>5108956

Cause that's not a worthy goal at all amirite

I can write ridiculously good love poems, which seem to act as repellents nowadays more than anything.

>>5106762

I could have at least a couple times (substituting girl for gay guy), but my social retardation fucked it up.

First guy: read some of my philosophy and apparently wanted to fuck me. I had no idea and always assumed he was way out of my league. Ran into him at a bar where he hit on me relentlessly. I interpreted that to be just part of his goofy personality, especially since he was in a relationship (which I found out later was actually an open relationship). He explicitly asked me if I wanted to go to his apartment. I interpreted that to mean that he'd like me to come over at some point in the future so we could become better friends. Then he cornered me in the bar bathroom and made out with me. I continued assuming he was just drunk and even after that night assumed he was too good for me. Found out recently that he's apparently been trying to get with me for years but now we're living in different states.

Second guy was a friend of a friend who had heard a lot about me and my philosophy stuff and apparently had a raging hard on for me before we had even met since I'm apparently smart and many gay guys are, intentionally, morons. When we met, he started flirting with me and it was the first time that I realized while it was actually taking place that that's what was happening. I'd never flirted with anyone but felt obligated to reciprocate until I could escape the situation and had one of my friends tell the guy that I don't like hooking up.

tl;dr apparently my philosophy work helps make me sexy but I'm a massive social retard so nothing ends up happening.

>>5109076
ALPHA AS FUCK
L
P
H
A

A
S

F
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C
K

>>5108857
i don't write but if i was going to it wouldn't be about sex unless you're some kind of sex goddess.

>>5106762

I know women who have had guys lose interest when they learn she's interested in philosophy. Guys don't like being with a girl who's smarter than them.

>>5106762
>Girls are notorious for sleeping with guys who write, even if their writing is bad.

Girls who are sick in the head, yes.

Healthy women will generally write you off (pun) without a second thought unless you have something else to offer.

Only weird chicks undress for 'sensitive intellectual types'

>>5112686

>weird chicks

sounds good

>>5112697

no dude I mean weird as in their brother committed suicide and they've been cutting themselves ever since and will likely scream rape the following morning after you plow them

credo experto

>>5112701

eh i've had worse, except for the brother part

If you want to use your hobby to get laid, become an artist.

>get girl nekkid in the name of art
>piddle around on a canvas or page for like five minutes
>sex girl

I met this girl in my college English class. She was decently pretty, had a pretty face and a nice rack. She showed me some of her godawful poetry, which I lied so fucking hard about by telling her how good it was. I got a chance to fuck her but she reeked vaguely of shit (not even kidding) which killed my boner, so it all fell apart. At least I got a few pics out of it.

>>5113131

post them with spoilers

>>5111359
Because you don't lead with a love poem, freak.

>>5113012

This

It's not that difficult if you actually enjoy putting the time into building the skills

>Draw/Paint whatever you like
>Practice, practice, practice
>Read philosophy and don't be pretentious
>Do a mind expanding drug at least once in your life
>Fuck Bitches


This is all tongue in cheek but you literally cannot go wrong if you do this. You can do the same thing with writing but there are vastly more women attracted to artists than writers.

>>5106762
How do you mean. Of course people like creative types. People who make music, write about passion, dance and sing are precious treasures to us all.

>>5109050
kek

>>5109214
permaban this man, please

>>5109379

>>5106762
nice to see sunhawk finally meeting puberty

I don't think any normal person would think of writing as a way to get sex. I mean, it's much easier to just lift weights and project false confidence. Writing is an incredibly neurotic vocation and I don't think that can/should be forced.

>>5108857

I had this theory whilst reading Bukowski - women would sleep with him because they know he'd write about it. Their own little claim to fame, cementing themselves into some sort of eternity. Erry good girl wants to be a muse. They also, and I don't know whether he made this claim himself, I can't remember, but women would pursue him because they saw his misery and wanted to make him happy. Call it that maternal instinct.