/lit/ - Literature

Giving hope

>>4892790
I'm struggling to figure out if this is something written by the world's biggest fucking retard who thinks he's brilliant or a satire of such a person.

I'm scared someone help

>>4892838
the original, which I believe was first posted to /r/ragecomics, was dead serious. this one's a joke

>>4892838
It's a satirical edit of a reddit comic about the Beatles that gets made fun of on /mu/ a lot.

>>4892843
that is not real

i don't believe it

>>4892843
Thanks for the context.

Funny how money helps whitstanding poverty.
Alphonse Allais

>>4892859
It's better like this so here's some more Allais for bump.

Funny how much money helps to withstand poverty.

A bus is a vehicle in which there is always room when going in the opposite direction.

I drink to forget that I’m a drunk.

To leave is to die a little, but to die is to leave a lot.

Feminie logic : it's when we get too close to a woman that she thinks we go too far.

>>4892902
>To leave is to die a little, but to die is to leave a lot.
heh

>>4892829

lol

>>4892790
>Steven King is Cervantes compared with David Foster Wallace
diamond in the rough
>captcha: agent cui rem
welp

>>4892927
It's a harold bloom quote, not a diamond in the rough

>>4892932
and no more shibboleths for you lisper

>>4892849
habeeb it, mang

John Hodgman's advice to writers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVUJIGqL1AA

>>4892943
I couldn't read all this, sorry

Someone post the "/lit/ on nihilism" composite pic, don't have it on this comp and it always cracks me up. :D

>>4892790
The problem with this is that Bloom really likes Pynchon and DeLillo

>lit
>humor

very funny

That "start with the Greeks" thing is epic, right, guys? Right?

>>4892790
It's funny because we do have a trip fag called "the patrician defender"

>>4892790
pretty good. 8/10

>>4892790
does anyone else think moot should add a board /pa/ for self-professed patricians of all mediums

it would be a containment board but also might foster some good cross-medium discussion

>>4892967

>posting on /lit
>can't read 700 words

>>4893195
wat

>>4893210

>>4892790
Hey guys sorry to be a dick, but the comic guy's choice of literature is pretty fucking amazing - why is it funny or toptkek?

singing in medieval italain is of course just silly in that context but he seems generally appreciative of "good literature"

>>4893223
0/10

>>4893220
I'm pretty sure someone just writes these and then "grades" them themselves.

>>4893227
what the actual fuck i am serious too

you guys seriously think that the comic guy is laughable?

>>4893236
Stop trying

>>4893254
sad

>>4893157

I think he meant it was because of how painful it is to get through.

>>4892960
I call my girlfriend habeeb and beeb when I'm lazy.

>>4892843
woah shit people really read these?

>>4893277

>>4893195
>tfw I look back on my schooling years prior to grade 12 and realize none of it mattered

i wish I had written at least amusing essays like this. I regret taking school so seriously.

>>4893512
I did write a few like this.

The best was for a dry run of a standardized test that required an essay. The essay question asked about our favorite television show.

I wrote that my favorite was the Brady Bunch and that the best episode was the one where the siblings got each other pregnant on accident while playing Twister, and it went downhill from there.

We later peer-reviewed the essays and the girl who got mine left the room crying. (She was also kind of a slut, and the first girl in the class to have had sex. Go figure.) The teacher pulled me out of the classroom into the hallway and told me I wasn't funny.

And that's when I decided my children would be educated independently. Because fuck that.

>>4893273
No I just never learned to read

>>4893743
>plebs think there was rape in Atlas Shrugged

>>4894001
that cant be real

One of the funniest things of all time.

Mah fav book.

>>4893738
Do you pay someone to shitpost for you?

>>4894077

>>4894040
What magazine printed this?

>>4894080

>>4894084
LOL

>>4894084

>>4894098

>>4894089
What if the next literary movement is going to be nigger-fiction (or something). Basically hip hop lyrics extended into novels.

>>4894106
I guess it exists already.
https://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/hood-novels

>>4892790

>>4894110
Well, i can definitely see this taking off.

>>4894113
Does anyone have the one where his moralising leads to him being distracted from making a choice?

>>4894089

To be honest that sounds like something I'd want to read. At least the plot sounds interesting.

>>4894117
couldn't bother to save every single one, so i got only these 2, the "collection" and multi-track drifting

>>4894116
just found this... "No one on the shelves has swagger like us"
www.thecartelpublications.com

>>4894122
I like that one.

>>4894124
>www.thecartelpublications.com
this is gold, thank you!

>>4894136
My favorite so far but there is so much more to find.
http://www.thecartelpublications.com/#!product/prd1/409698411/year-of-the-crackmom-by-vj-gotastory

I know a joke. Everything between Epicurus and Descartes. On big aburd joke. I kek everytime I think about it.

>>4894054
i dictate to my mother

This is the reason why I love you more than any other board /lit/. I browsed /b/ first, got bored by all the gore, nude, nothing challenging about going one step further. These jokes on the other hand are really witty .

>>4894225
You sound 14.

>>4894227

Then he's actually got a decent excuse to be on 4chan.

>>4894027
I'm literally cackling aloud. This is what I imagine lit to be.

>>4894063
I'm not sure that the guy read the patrick melrose novels because I don't think that tales of child abuse and drug addiction and casual sex before your dad's funeral are what most people would give to their "genius niece"

Or he did read them and he is a magnificient bastard.

>>4893512
lord of the flies was the only good book I read in highwchool.

>it doesn't matter
fuck you

>>4894063

This reminds me of something I want to do. Basically, Honest Bookshop Categories. Best I have so far is Bullshit About Hitler For Weirdoes (seriously, have you seen the cottage industry around that shit?).

>>4894093
Wow, we've now gone from first world problems to white person problems huh

>>4894011
oh my lord everything about that

>this is page 3

all of them are different colors and hole punched on both sides I'm gonna fucking die

that ending

>>4894572
The funniest thing is he still passed with D-.

>>4893195
>"This page was funny but very inappropriate and has nothing to do with the assignment. Mr. Bunthe analhg not find it way funny snf

+ --------- ----- ---- hsbr no ehgu ltny yor sln hm yout hyue"

Somebody send this guy to legibility school.

>>4894035

Love this, would hang on my wall/10.

>>4894469

Great idea. It'd be great to do a "just here for dates" section as a kind of ice-breaking meta-joke.

>>4894607

Cool. What books would go there (whether real or made up)?

>>4894611
Murakami.

>>4894011
>teacher writes 'page is to big'

How was I ever fooled by these

>>4894865
Did you think these were real too?

http://pauillac.inria.fr/~xleroy/stuff/tomato/tomato.html

Perec spoofing a scientific paper

>>4894040
>>4894084

Hysterical

>>4892790
>i then proceed to walk out singing my favorite canto from la divina commedia in italian
miei lati

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GuzBkmVp2k

>>4892843
>this entire thing
[gagging intensifies]

>>4892943
Fucking hell Robert

>>4894596
>>4894084
10/10

>>4894084
This could only be improved with poorly written English accents.

>>4892943
This is one of the worst things I have ever read.

>>4894027
Is that bald guy Foucault?

>>4892943
>still only 4 stars

>>4894596
>Langweilig!

1/?

>>4895318

>>4895318
3/?

>>4892943
Fucking Sasha Grey.
She makes ambient music too.

>>4895363
I happen to think Soderbergh is one of the few thinking and sane directors lately of Hollywood. The Girlfriend Experience was Grey's one real movie. Casting her was genius. It is a role about a woman who is not really there. There is no there there. There is no her there. There is no her. It is just turtles, all the way down. That's the real Sasha Grey. It is the only role she can ever play.

>>4893498
Typical tumblr faggot

>>4895338
4/?

>>4894040
>HERMIONE
>And finally became a man

My fucking sides. Jesus christ.

>>4895392
5/?

>>4895392
Still asshurt about this?

>>4895406
6/?

>>4895412
7/?

>>4895409
What part about "lit-humour thread" didn't you understand?

>>4895409
Go back to /tv/, you true detective watching anti-Natalist faggot.

>>4895415
The bit where you posts your images as humour.

>>4895415
Shit
7/?

>>4895419
>you posts
>>>/b/

>>4894011
I wrote something like this once. In highschool I was supposed to write a speech to the county's decision council about issues within the school. I think I wrote about world domination and e-coli outbreaks. I think I still have it lying around, I can post it if there's any interest

>>4894098

>>4895471
>/lit/

>>4895474
what?

>>4895496
Nothing.

>>4895618

>>4895625

>>4893713
You sound like a fucking peach. Carry on, anon.

>>4895618
>young dasein

always gets me

kek

>>4894001
Shiver me timbers, I swear I've read this somewhere before.

>>4894100
Oh my fucking god, I just finished The Road, this is gold

>>4893026
Kek, this was my first thought.

>>4895755

>>4893498

> I was this person from 6th to 8th grade

This is horrifying for me.

>>4894011

3edgy5me

>>4895797
Shut the fuck up, faggot.

>>4895779
This is 10/10 every time

>>4895755
This is idiotic because the wives of the philosophers use the logic of the philosopher.

>>4894011
>why

>>4895815

>>4895832
I've seen this picture before and think this is missing the "that's the joke" text.

>>4894039
I don't get it

>>4895843

I googled "that's the joke" and went with one without the text, because I felt it more elegant.

>>4895846
A german bear that masturbates

>>4895843

I hope this is troll.
We are on 4chan, so it is.

>>4895469
yes

>>4895904
here it is

>>4893498
i know a girl like this. she was near the top of the class and got into u of chicago.

>>4893498
You just described everyone in my creative writing class... EVERY SINGLE ONE.

>>4895847

masterful patrician, even your memes are beautiful

>>4894063
>Infinite Jest
>eccentric aunt

Whoever organized this shit is an idiot. Infinite Jest is the best novel of the late 20th century, not fit for aunts, and I am not joking.

Seriously, why is it so hard to just accept the fact that Wallace was genius?

>>4896069

>Seriously, why is it so hard to just accept the fact that Wallace was genius?

He was a very talented writer, but he wasn't a 'genius'. He didn't do anything which Pynchon hadn't or couldn't.

>>4896080
>pynchon
That fucker is indirectly responsible for cyberpunk.

>>4896069
Wallace wasn't a genius. Pynchon is a genius. Tao Lin is a genius.

>>4894001
I got a boner

>>4894105
fuckin Hawkeye, what a card!

Does anyone have that pic of the guy standing on books to see over the wall? Any of the variations on it, but particularly the one where he's on a huge pile and sees up to heaven?

>>4896134
imagine that shit nowadays
>show cancelled producers fired tumblr posts about rape for 6 months

>>4896069
The category is below the books. Infinite Jest is for your hipster nephew.

>>4896152
It was a simpler time, a more genial warfare

I stopped holding doors for people because I got tired of carrying screwdrivers everywhere with me.

>>4895950
i like how textbook funding is the secondary issue. kids need clean water first. A+

where is the picture of nietzie where it's like a playing card and it has all the modified quotes like "when you stare into the abyss, I push you into it" or something like that

>that glorious feel when you come up against the GREAT WALL OF NAZI, the impassable boundary of contemporary philosophy where even the most brilliant and educated minds collapse in a heap and revert to childlike, infantile shrieking
>that feel when you pass through the boundary unscathed, because you are not a bourgeois leftist vagina with 40 years of intelligentsia correctthink programming
>that feel when you are able to enjoy the subtleties and continuities of authors whose grandiose theories speak of modernity, the individual, and the state, without tripping over the word 'JEW' like a landmine, and blasting yourself into unphilosophical political correctness
>that feel when the garden of philosophically hating jews is the last great, uncultivated expanse remaining to modern scholarship
>that feel when its wonders are untrod by the plebeian feet of leftist master's theses and meta-meta-meta-analysis
>that feel when you are esoteric, enlightened by your own antisemitism

A classic:

>6th grade
>Reading The Brothers Karamazov for the second time
>Teacher asks me to give her the book.
>Tell me to read Ulysses, that it's better.
>Tell her I've already read Ulysses twice, besides "Everything you need to know about life is in The Brothers Karamazov."
>She doesn't know where it's from

Damn teachers.

i feel you.
>kindergarten
>reading ramayana and composing my own anustup style verses (in sanskrit, lol)
>teacher thinks i'm drawing with the rest of the troglodytes and compliments my sunshine rays

>>4894117
This one?

>>4896107
>Tao Lin is a genius

>>4895755
>>4895765

Pedantic jokes like these are proof that academics don't know how to live.

>>4896364
>Pedantic
here's that little word again

>>4896399

What about it? It's apt to describe hokey academic-types.

>>4896276
What is it with cultural leftist? This one bitch disregarded john locke the insentient she found he was racist, i.e. every philosopher ever

Still tried to give her the D, only got head.

>>4896227
If your computer is light, it'll be quick to run.

>>4896418
The what?

>>4896272
That thread went 404, with just like two or three actual responses. It could have been great, but faggots keep debating bullshit in an anonymous board while we could be loling all the time.

>>4896310

that's fucking hilarious.
does anyone else think it might be better without the fifth panel though?

>>4896276

>>4896421
I think he means Hannah Arendt

>>4896069
It's in the nephew category. And is that really the only book in that category that seemed like it didn't fit the "eccentric aunt" label?

Like, 1Q84 is probably the only book on that shelf that I can see even remotely fitting into that category.

>>4894089
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sj6UnDdp4Mw

>>4896080
>He was a very talented writer, but he wasn't a 'genius'. He didn't do anything which Pynchon hadn't or couldn't.

I don't think that means he wasn't a genius. Also, while I agree that Pynchon is the better writer of the two, saying he didn't do anything Pynchon hadn't implies less of a difference between their writing than I think exists.

>>4895950
>E Coli virus
>virus

>>4896100
I like certain elements of cyberpunk, could you please tell me which book was partially responsible for it? I hope the recommendation would get me to read read him

>>4896080
>He didn't do anything which Pynchon hadn't or couldn't.

Pynchon hasn't written any essays has he? I'm not saying he couldn't either, but you have to admit DFW can write a damn good essay

>>4893026
/lit/ one one of the more consistently funny boards on 4chan with /ck/

>>4896865
>consistently funny
I'm only here because it's better than browsing facebook pages, at least I get to know some literature. If you're a newfriend I understand you laughing at this thread, but with a few exceptions, it is just old content.

>>4895779
I was looking for this and didn't know the name, thanks so much

>sitting alone in Starbucks reading Finnegans Wake
>cute hipster girl approaches me
>start trembling with fear
>"Hey! You're reading Finnegans Wake? Is it any good?"
>"I-I think you'll find Finnegans Wake transcends the normative good-bad dichotomy, actually"
>she says she doesn't understand
>snort with laughter
>coffee spurts from my nostrils, along with a single strand of spaghetti
>panicking, I swiftly pull the tablecloth to my nose and blow
>more spaghetti falls out
>try to catch it all in my fedora, but it quickly overflows
>the girl is staring at me in horror
>I stand up, knocking my chair over, and sprint towards the door
>trip on a string of spaghetti that was dangling from my nose
>as I crash to the floor a wet bubble of bolognese sauce escapes from my ass
>attempt to stand but slip on a meatball that has rolled out of my trouser leg
>by now everyone is laughing hysterically
>I try to explain the opening sentence of Finnegans Wake but my mouth is full of spaghetti
>start vomiting uncontrollably
>the spaghetti wraps itself around my neck
>can't breathe
>beg for help but no one can hear me over their laughter
>before dying, make my last confessions:
>"I have no idea what's going on in Finnegans Wake!"
>everything goes black
>mfw

>>4896914

>sittting a ronin stun Dear, readegin finnegans awake
>acute hipstergirl encroaches me
>stark tremblin' afeard
>Ahoy ured finagalings Quake question lisitany good question
>eye-eye think Hewell find finiginsuayke trans-incense theN ormandy goodab dyke a(ctually)natomy
>sea shells she sellsn't oversit
>insulllfate con mirth
>cafe Sprite de mis nosetrils, sa slong single strand sof /sp/ag GET.
>pAnakin! gET dOwn! I swiftlipool tableclothe. Tomb I know simbol ow.
>Moral: /sp/ag GET. fall out boy.
>Trite Toque. Cachet. Shit. Tall. Jeremy Lin. Federal (G-Men hate) butt-i quickly understops
>Thug Earlsssssssss raring me in Horrah. The horrah. The horrah
>Flavouir Ice Stand! Upkno,,cking my chair over, et Sprint towards le door.
>Pert on 1 stringSSSSSSSSS of spaghetti twas hat danglin' de me narise.
>tt I crash to le floor un wet bubble de Bolognese sources capes from my Bu
>.........................editor i had left some puncjewation owt off my furst edition please feel free to salt and peppet as you wish to tatse
>attept toucan sand Ass lip onamonameatball tha thas ruled ute ufe mi trooser loog.
>"Bye!" Know Ebony won Iceland (-ing!) Hysterectomy!
>I try tie explie thie openie sentie Fi Ni Guy Why bye my my Sigh fi fi spaghettye
>starthrowg un cunt role able y!
>thespian ghetto praws fsleif acircle mi neck.
>Cunt breath.
>beg four help Ass know won can heremoi sur there LMFAO.
>be four dye Ying-Yan comma Mike Ma cunt fessessionalslast
>eye haff k N.O.I.D. wuts going g[o]i[n]g go[in]g fake win again
>todo es Dark Ness.
>mon visage qu

>>4896917
>I met this mad, lovely woman not long ago while I was drinking wine and reading "Finnegans Wake" when all the sudden she goes"Hey! You're reading Finnegans Wake? Is it any good?" which took me by surprise, because it had been a while up to that point since any woman had talked to me, given my raggedy condition and hobo-like appereance.""I-I think you'll find Finnegans Wake transcends the normative good-bad dichotomy, actually" at which she repliced she doesn't understand....she couldn't understand....but why? couldn't she understand that which is sacred to every single one of us on this earth.....which eats at us, bit by bit, day by day. But worry not, so I tried to make the situation less tense by snorting, which obviously went horribly (unlike Neal's snorts, which were pure, authentic, mand and wild) and coffee (which I paid $.05/cup on that skidrow cafe) spurts out of my nose, along with a single strand of spaguetti. At this moment, all was lost, so I tried to remend the scene by grabbing the end of one of those tablecloths which addorn such decrepit places......and to blow my nose with it.
>But alas, more spaguetti comes out, while the girl stands there in terror, and I feel bad and want to cry. My fedora couldn't contain it. Why is it that men go along life hitting out heads on every corner and every woman that comes along our way, only to realize during the lingering pain that we were blind all along? anyway by this time the whole place is laughing histerically, like a mad jazz concert with Dizzy Gillespie, of course, there was no jazz, and the laughs weren't that of joy, but those of mock. I felt to sick I started to uncontrolably vomit. Merde. I attempt to ask Ginsberg to help me, but he is chanting mantras and meditating, that filthy jew. I try to explain to the girl that everything will be alright, that we should get marry, buy a jalopy, move to Denver and live the rest of our lives as the pariahs we were destined to be. Oh and I try to explain to her what's going on on Finnegan's wake. Which was, coincidentally, my last words on this planet, since I had no idea what was going on on Finnegan's Wake.

http://www.nytimes.com/books/97/05/18/reviews/pynchon-sloth.html

Better than anything I've ever read by Wallace

>>4896919
>i'm in the starbucks, reading finnegans wake
>this kind of cute girl walks up to me
>i'm already getting kind of sexy. i'm a horndog sometimes. you know how girls make you. but i start getting the goddamn shakes, too, for some reason. not because i'm yellow or nothing, cause i'm not. i just start shaking. sometimes i shake. i don't know why i do it, but i do.
>"Hey! You're reading Finnegans Wake? Is it any good?"
>"I-I think you'll find Finnegans Wake transcends the normative good-bad dichotomy, actually"
>she says she doesn't know what i'm saying.
>all girls are a little air-headed, you know. they're all the goddamn same. this one is a little air-headed too, i can tell, but i'm half in love with her all the same. you know how it is. a girl comes up to you and asks about finnegans wake and you just sort of fall in love with her.
>so what i do is, i snort a bit. just a little. just to show her that it was a little funny, what she said. in a cute way. you would've snorted too if you'd been there. you would've.
>as i'm snorting coffee starts coming out of my nose, along with one tiny string of spaghetti. just one. can you believe it? you snort a bit and goddamn coffee and spaghetti comes out of your goddamn nose.

>>4896925
>i don't know what to do. i mean, i'm not panicking or nothing. some guys would panic in that situation but not me. i'm suave. real suave. suave as hell, sometimes. i just sort of take the tablecloth and bring it up to my nose and blow into it, all suave as hell.
>it doesn't make it better though. if anything it makes it worse. you know how these things are. you do one thing wrong and everything just snowballs. a bunch more spaghetti starts coming out of my nose. i'm leaking spaghetti like a bastard.
>i take off my hat, my people-shooting hat, and try to catch all the goddamn spaghetti in the hat. you know, all suave-like.
>the girl's looking at me with her mouth open wide-eyed and all, as if she's never seen someone try to catch spaghetti in their goddamn hat.
>i stand up. my chair falls over. i start running to the door.
>my breath's been real bad lately. not the smell, i mean, but the breathing. i start getting out of breath and sweating like a bastard if i just walk a few blocks or something. don't even get me started about running. so while i'm going at the door i start getting dizzy and i sort of trip. i bust my ass. some bolognese sauce comes out of it, too. just a little.
>all the phonies in the starbucks are laughing at me now.
>i start trying to tell them all about the beginning of finnegan's wake but I can't, i mean, none of them understand. i do it, though. i do it goddamn good too, but all of them are too dense to get it, those idiots.
>then i start puking. i mean really puking. spaghetti starts coming out and it's getting all tangled up around my neck and i just can't stop puking.
>i can't even breathe anymore. my shirt is absolutely soaking. i start thinking about allie's glove, with all those poems written on it. i want to say something about that, but none of these bastards would understand. they didn't even understand what i said about finnegans wake, for chrissake.
>i can tell i'm going to die. i can just feel it. you get these feelings about some things and this was one of them. i knew it. so i said one last thing before i died, just one, to let them know that i wasn't a goddamn phony like any of them.
>"I completely understood Finnegans Wake!"
>everything went black. i mean, pitch black. i thought of allie's glove, and jean, and stradlater and ackley, and even that goddamn maurice. if you want to know the truth, i even missed them a little.
>mfw

>>4896829
Pynchon has written some book reviews and introductions which in general are solid gold.

>>4892843
The Beatles are the most overrated band of all times. I get a little bit queasy whenever some fanboy is lionizing them. Better than Beiber? I don't even know about that.They're both mediocre and terribly over-hyped. /rant

hahaha this greentext Joyce stuff is killing me XD

>>4896946
that was almost funny, a bit too obvious

>>4896946
what an interesting and original opinion, anon

>>4896963
Not even trolling. But that's just what a troll would say.

>>4896964
anon? I am beyond you benighted anons.

>>4896917
gd stufff m8. now do cormac mccarthy and/or tao lin

>>4895412
this is mainly funny for what nietzsche says at the end.

>>4896432
nah dude the fifth panel makes it for me.

>>4895852
GERMANY DOES IT AGAIN!

>>4896788
V. I guess

Currently reading Gravity's Rainbow, it definitely has a "near future" vibe to it, but not enough to be considered Cyberpunk

Against the Day is quite steampunkish though

>>4897204
>Gravity's Rainbow, it definitely has a "near future" vibe to it
WTF

>>4896100
>That fucker is indirectly responsible for cyberpunk.
not even a little bit

>>4897217
''Pynchon is a kind of mythic hero of mine,"

http://www.nytimes.com/2003/01/19/books/netscape.html?src=pm&pagewanted=1

First result from searching their surnames on google.

>>4897216
"Near future" relating to the 40s

>>4897236

Doesn't even begin to support the claim.

Are you not a faggot and will you answer this question correctly?
( ) yes
( ) no

>>4897252
no to the first question and yes to the second one

>>4897252

Do you kiss your mother before you go to bed?

>>4897266
Don't you?

>>4897272

I say! Here's a fellow who kisses his mother before they go to bed!

>>4897252
Are you the faggot in the cage?

>>4897236
>''Pynchon is a kind of mythic hero of mine,"
That doesn't fucking mean that Pynchon is responsible for Cyberpunk, however indirectly.

>>4897330
B-b-b-but I am not.

>>4897353

Well technically, that makes you better than anyone. QED >>4897330

>>4897356
>>4897353

>we are all
All != one

Unless, you're the "E pluribus unum" kind of guy.

And it doesn't make him better, it makes him different. It's not a qualitative property, it's rather a specific one.

>>4894024
heh

>>4896925
>>4896929
10/10

>>4895782

>>4894039

Their handwriting is too shitty.

>>4897454
It's the wonderful Robert Gernhardt and I'm surprised to see that here.

It's a joke poem:

Der Kragenbär
der holt sich munter
einen nach dem andern runter

It's a masturbation joke.

The Asian black bear / masturbates one time after the other

It rhymes in German.

>>4894011
>61%

so he passed? lel

>>4892943
you know when you're on a porn-related site and it has buttons for twitter, facebook, etc, and you think "who the fuck would post what they are jerking off to on their facebook page?" well, you just know robert would.

>>4897445
Reversing this clip should be fun to watch.

>>4897463
Well, he basically told the story of Oidipoys, so there is that.

>>4897002
The fact that so many books still name the Beatles "the greatest or most significant or most influential" rock band ever only tells you how far rock music still is from becoming a serious art. Jazz critics have long recognized that the greatest jazz musicians of all times are Duke Ellington and John Coltrane, who were not the most famous or richest or best sellers of their times, let alone of all times. Classical critics rank the highly controversial Beethoven over classical musicians who were highly popular in courts around Europe. Rock critics are still blinded by commercial success: the Beatles sold more than anyone else (not true, by the way), therefore they must have been the greatest. Jazz critics grow up listening to a lot of jazz music of the past, classical critics grow up listening to a lot of classical music of the past. Rock critics are often totally ignorant of the rock music of the past, they barely know the best sellers. No wonder they will think that the Beatles did anything worth of being saved.

>>4894242

ba-dum *tss*

>>4896925
Top kek. Pls do Dostoevskij

>>4897501
>Rock critics are still blinded by commercial success
> the Beatles sold more than anyone else (not true, by the way)
Not being a dick or anything, but aren't these two statements mutually exclusive?

>>4897510
its pasta you fucking nerd

>>4897501

Sp what sort of music do YOU like? I'm honestly curious. I don't like the Beatles either and I listen to a lot of avant-garde stuff but even that can be pretty juvenile at times. Then again every genre has its faults.

>>4892790

>>4896694

>keeping an eye on philosophy and Simone at the same time.

lel

>>4894040
>a boy never forgets his first rager

are we allowed videos?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGxqOOHxaFo

>>4896925
>>4896929

High contender for best thing I've ever read on /lit/. You nailed it.

>>4897620
So good

>>4896310
That isn't distracting him.

He's saying that by default the train goes straight, and he would be a murderer were he to turn it

>>4894011
The funniest part is if he just took out the blank page and made the colors right and took out the pictures he'd have a B.

>>4894888
A classic. Thanks for actually contributing literary humor.

>>4894001
http://ardentepatience.bandcamp.com/track/holy-dicks-batman

>>4897501
The Beatles were immensely influential on mainstream rock music come out of the mid sixties and continued to put out fantastic material as solo artist until their retirement/murder.

Obviously not the best but they were certainly talented as both a group and as individuals. Also you have to remember how they were in their own time. Things that sound dated or cliche now werent necessarily always that way. Though I admit their original really poppy stuff is kinda bad.

from ffifigh

>>4895412
>dat marx at the end

>>4896283
>tfw reading borges as a teenager
>tfw you have your own garden of forking paths on your house
>tfw you have won the lottery on babel
>tfw you also had a dream about the palace of kubla khan
>tfw yo momma is an infinite sphere in which the center is everywhere and the circumference doesnt exist

i bet you faggots dont even have an aleph in your basement

>>4897595
>>4897860

see >>4897521
i've got no problem with the beatles they're just overrated. i personally listen to mostly just /mu/core and folk punk (not saying thats any better)

>>4893277
>tfw u realize your life is turning into notes from underground

>>4893512
>>4893713
once i wrote a short story in a compulsory it exam that i didnt give a fuck about

>>4893498
>don't they have any Hank Green

please tell me this is not a relative of John Green who makes music

>>4894011
In my freshman writing class, we had to do a visual analysis of two pictures about texting while driving that had to be 5 pages long

I ran out of things to say around page 2 and wrote a bunch of bullshit about Nietzsche for the last 3 pages

I got an A

>>4897837
is this read by christian bale

>>4893202
:) it's true

>>4893195
at the point you would think the teacher wouldn't even mark up things like spelling mistakes and would just write something like see me after class

>>4897463
at my school 69 and below was failing

>>4898760
link

>>4898798
http://pastebin.com/v7Wv5LQv

>>4897130
>imypling Nietzsche had any original ideas to be stolen

>>4894036
>james joyce
>postmodernism

>>4898816
>pseudo-intellectual using every opportunity to tell his teacher he reads Nietzsche

>>4893498
fuck, my ex was like this.

>>4898839

lol@u

>>4898765

As a teacher, yes, we would, but it's intensely interesting and would make a good procrastination break from actually grading papers.

Even if I'd stop grading, I'd still finish reading whatever this fuckspawn had to say, have a sensible chuckle, then get my "F" stamp out and get the kid in to figure out what possessed him to write something like this.

Boredom, or anger, or problems at home? Help him out, or make the class better.

"WAT U GON DU BOUT IT", "Fuck school", or "Fuck you" gets it passed on to the principal.

>>4897634
Oh my fucking god top

>>4898754
he even has a special guitar

>>4898804
>http://pastebin.com/v7Wv5LQv

there is no fucking way you submitted this for class

>>4895843
The joke is what it is.

>>4898967
>>4898754

From the small amount I've heard it's a youtubesque version of They Might Be Giants and The Mountain Goats.
It's utter shit, and really just him talking fast about 'geek stuff' over a guitar riff.

>>4899589

>>4899597
*différent

>>4897672
Don't even fucking start

>>4897860
>implying they didn't steal from joe meek

>>4898999
It was a writing 102 class. Having a correct bibliography basically ensured you a good grade. Plus my professor was pretty cool; in her feedback, she took it seriously, but I never found out if she was just playing along or not

>>4897274
This is wrong, so wrong ;)

>>4899615
*différant, faggot. L2Derrida

>>4898511
Chupala Santi