/lit/ - Literature

>>4828435
Good on ya, OP
Everyone knows that The Lurking Fear is the best Hartman story

>ha ha ha! Lovecraft is bad those patricians on /lit/ said so! They use big words and cite obscure french philosophers so clearly they know more than me xP

>>4828448
It wasn't the fact she liked Hartman, he's great.
Her choice of favorite story was terrible. Color out of Space is so damn boring

>>4828452
Well, what's your favorite Lovecraft story?

>>4828448
Lovecraft has some good material, if you look past the racism. It's pretty funny he's become the college liberal pseudo-intellectual's cosmic-horror author of choice, considering how much he hated the Inuit.

>>4828458
Call of Cthulhu, the objectively correct answer.

>>4828467
which is why I froth when Lovecraft is dismissed, stories like Rats In The Walls and Dagon are masterpiss

>Freshman year at Uni
>Checking books out at the Library all the time
>Reading whenever I have a spare chance
>Halfway down the line group of people sit down with me at lunch
>"What are you reading, Anon? We always see you reading!"
>Happened to be reading some pleb tier trash at the time
>They start sitting down with me everyday because they think I'm a loser
>mfw they almost caught me packing heavy heat

>>4828480
>Rats in the Walls
>not garbage
Baby's first I see

>>4828480
I bet you liked the Music of Erich Zann too pleb

>reading at coffee shop nearby university
>look like shit (greasy hair, sweatpants and dirty t-shirt) after sleepless night
>group of regular teens there, two guys and a girl, sit next to me
>ask me what my book is about
>half asleep, I stumble over my words and wind up saying "I don't know"
>look at each other and smile, suppressing laughter
>begin talking to me in a faux-friendly tone, the kind of ironic tone groups of friends use when preying on poor innocent people who don't understand they're victims
>realize instantly what they're doing
>begin to feign the personality of the cognitively impaired person they believe me to be
>one of the guys, now unable to hold back his laughter, turns around and starts quietly laughing
>continue giving them outlandish responses to their outlandish questions, though in the most friendly voice possible
>girl with them begins to feel bad
>begins asking genuine questions, subtly sticking up for me
>the two guys keep making fun of me
>continue to act obliviously cheerful, entertaining their every question
>girl, now looking upset, gets up and leaves
>guys follow her
>can't make out what they're saying but they're clearly arguing
>smile and go back to reading

>>4828471
I think Call of Cthulhu has been massively overhyped. On the other hand that moment in The Colour Out Of Space with the wife crumbling in the farmhouse is one of the most chilling things I've ever read.

>>4828471
oh shit you just got out patricianed by a chick and you didn't even realise it.

>>4828997

You were made fun of for over half an hour and did nothing to improve your situation. You may not believe you lost, but they are now a part of your characterization. Congrats, you are, if nothing else, subjectively autistic.

>>4828997
Oh man..... you should not of let that go on. Next time stand up for yourself, you will never become the ubermensh at this rate...

>>4828997

>>4829110
Not that dude, but when you actually do have autism, a situation like that is honestly not necessarily embarrassing. I used to wave my dick around in grade school for laughs. I completely understood the outside perception (more being laughed at than being laughing with), but I didn't give a shit what other people thought of me--the personal enjoyment from the absurdity was worth more.

As an adult I'm thankful (for the most part). I can act normal most of the time so as to maintain my job and relationships, but it is nice knowing that the option of not giving a shit is always sitting there behind the curtains.

>>4828997
>one time walking to my car.
>two guys come up and start talking in that patronizing way people talk when they're trying to take the piss out of someone
>look them straight in the eye, standing straight up and respond with an equally exaggerated tone
>they literally both stop what they're doing and walk away confused

People respond to, and are unnerved by, confidence. It's something that people seriously underestimate; confidence makes all the difference

>>4829228
Sup Fyodor

>>4828997

god ur such a faggot it's amazing

>>4828435
speak honestly and humbly

>>4829228
I'm that dude. You get it. I have nothing but confidence. I entertained these guys for my own entertainment. The whole time I just gave them ammo to make fun of me. That they thought I was serious made it all the more fun for me.

They were a couple of teenage rapscallions. Why should I care what they think?

>>4828471

Not mountains of madness

>>pleb

>>4829325
the more I am on this website the more surreal the experience is when I think about how prophetic Notes from the Underground was

>>4828448
lovecraft is a shit, though. His stories are banal, and not frightening at all, and they've been that way since long before I came here.

Jesus christ /lit/

Why do you guys do this to yourselves?

>I just saw the most horribly indescribable thing, and I will now proceed to describe it

Every Lovecraft story in a nutshell.

>>4828435

>at the pub
>starting to talk politics
>descends into economics

actually no you don't bring it up ever

>>4829726
>>I just saw the most horribly indescribable thing, and I will now proceed to describe it

more like ur mum in a nutshell

>>4829342

iktf

>Take creative writing workshop.
>Class of ten with woman lecturer who starts talking about plot development and hero's journey.
>"Implying I read for plot," I shout through cupped hands.
>Class glares at me.
>"two thousand and fourteen,"I tell everyone
>Teacher tuts and starts discussing character development in Harry Potter.
>"Do you even read?" I shout. "Go back to mew"
>Ginger man to my left tells me to shut up.
>"I bet you haven't even read Ulysses or Dee-Eff-Double-you" I tell him
>Class starts shouting at me, asking me to leave. It was all that ginger man's fault.
>I turn back to him
>"Your filthy roach. I bet you read gurm and genre fiction."
>He stands up and tells me to get out.
>"No," I said. "I'm the only real reader here. I read for prose, you're just a fucking casual"
>He hit me right on the nose, the cartilage cracks, blood sprays over my desk.
>I get up and walk out, grinning to myself at how superior I am.
>Filthy roaches. I bet they're talking about Kerouac now.

>>4829802
>>>/lit/

>>4829802
is this OC? It's pretty good. Publishable.

>>4829952
Not OC.

>>4828435
>reveal of powerlevel
>didn't tell her that Lovecraft is a racist meritocrat

>Be at club near Uni
>Drinking and smoking in smoke area, just hanging out and talking to random peopl
>Meet girl
>Biomed student
>We start talking over the table
>Discover we're from towns that are about a mile from each other
>Hit it off
>She comes and sits next to me
>Talk for two hours
>Great chemistry
>Definitely gonna take her home with me
>Already have her number
>Eventually she asks me what books I like
>I throw out a couple of random things that most people would have heard of
>She hasn't heard of them
>Ask her what she likes
>She asks me if I've read The Hunger Games Harry Potter because those are her favourite books ever
>I am drunk
>I laugh straight in her face
>I mock her for being 20 years old and enjoying the books she does
>Atmosphere ruined
>Conversation is now stifled and awkward
>Continues as a husk of what it was for about 15 minutes, at which point we part ways and I never see her again
Terrible stuff, /lit/.

>>4830830
it's not your fault.

>>4828997

I do stuff like that all the time. 4chan honestly fucking ruined me. In a few ways. Firstly, getting called a faggot by a stranger feels like nothing to me. Secondly, I'll happily make a fool out of myself to fuck with someone.

>>4830830
when i'm drunk, i don't hold back also. i'm usually really respectful about people's tastes, but when i'm drunk i say whatever i feel. i do goofy humiliating shit when i'm sober, but probably 70% of my life regrets were when i was drunk.

>>4830830
>>I throw out a couple of random things that most people would have heard of

I think you overestimate how well read the plebs are

>>4828452
The colour out of space is actually one of the more creative books he wrote and once you're done with the cheap thrills of the rest, that one stands out.

You're the pleb in this situation OP.

>>4828471
>call of cthulhu

Yep, pleb as fuck.

I-Is this real? Are you seriously turning down girls you get on well because of their choice of reading?

>>4830946

how does it feel to be a pleb?

>>4828452
>boring
He managed to describe a colour that's impossible to conceive of because it's so alien to our mind. Think about that. And he does it through description.

>>4830058
>meritocracy
>bad
Georgeconstanzaisjudgingyou.jpg

>>4829264
It's true.
>be pretty much a loser in high school, be in 10th grade
>these jocky guys start fucking with me a little over the last few days
>they come over to where im sitting at lunch and start talking in that patronizing way etc, having a laugh, one is giggling and is about to say something
>i laugh very loud and exaggeratedly, get up say very loudly to the entire cafeteria to pay attention because *name* is about to say something "REALLY funny and cool!"
>it gets quiet and everyone is looking at them
>they walk away sort of dumbfounded and never talk to me again

I guess it's sort of a lame story but it's pretty much the only "cool" thing, if you could even call it that, I ever did in middle/high school. The nerds I sat at lunch with sort of looked up to me afterward.

>>4831037
lol

>>4828997
I would do the same thing, bro. I don't see a point in being hurt by such simple things.

>>4830946
>actually dating girls or participating in the even more disgusting modern hookup culture
So urban plebian.

>>4831037
gj the entire cafeteria laughed at you instead of just two guys

>>4830951
not him but must feel better than virgin

>>4828467
>if you look past the racism
Sure thing, Chaim.

Dumb bimbos are /lit/s sour grapes. 90% of people are uneducated idiots, might as well learn to enjoy their company and get along wi th them

>>4830946
This. Absolutely.

Are you interested in a girl because of what she reads? The only girl I'm interested in is a girl that accknowledges she's merely a recreational and aesthetic part of a man's world. Glad mah gf understands this, although she's well read in history books.

>Cute girl I've been checking out allot lately comes up to me
>"What are you reading on your Phone?"
>"A b-book"
>"Yeah I can see that Anon but WHAT are you reading?"
>"T-The Brothers Karamazov"
>"Oh, ok, I'm reading Twilight at home, you should really look into that if you're into literature"
>"It has it's flaws but it gets really good, just like Hunger Games"
>"W-will do"
>Pretend to be reading

Luckily I'm bisexual so there's still hope for me.

>>4831131
But on the otherhand elitism feeds the need for self esteem in a judgemental world so I understand exclusionary elitist academic culture has its appeal. I guess in the end just be true to yourself

>>4828435
>At Uni today
>Browsing the Library
>Bump into a girl and start talking about books
>Things are going well, ask her what her favorite genre is
>"Oh, I just like horror mostly..."
>She asks mine
>"Mystery, but I love horror too."
>We start lobbing a few softball questions at each other
>Get to her favorite author, H.P. Lovecraft
>"Oh, I just LOVE "The Color out of Space!" It's his best work by far, what about you?"
>Tell her I like The Outsider, and that being a tortured soul, I find it particularily poignant tale of confronting the monster that lives inside us all.
>be mysterious
>It's working
>Her female sense are inflamed by my display
>The signs are there, she wants to mate.
>whisk her away to a quiet alcove, in a seldom visited part of the library, right beneath the James Fennimore Cooper section.
>using my expert sexual tantra I massage her erogenous zones until she is a slave to passion and will obey my every command.
>she receives my bulbous and foul appendage orally beside a dusty copy of "The Deerskinner"
>At the apex of sexual ecstasy I deposit a load of oozing amorphous effluence in her eyes
>Slowly just back out of the debauched spectacle and leave
>niggers

>>4828486
This, why do people always treat you different when you're young and they catch you reading?

>Freshman
>Reading Roadside picnic
>Cool foreign kids walk by and slap the book out of my hand
>People start letting me join their friend groups out of pitty

It's like High School Musical or some shit and I didn't even read good books.

i've only been annoyed a few times by white trash when reading in public but for the most part no one really gives a shit.

>>4831154
>people bullying people for reading
>people bullying people at all
What kind of degenerate institution do you go to?

>cute girl in the patio
>we have a smoke
>its quiet
>I bring up that she's a psychology majour
>Get up to the point of dreams
>at this point I dont know shit about Freud
>still mention Freud to be accepted
>"Freud belives dreams are ... blah blah blah"
>inset my own meaning of dreams
>She sees through the bullshit but still laughs
>"okay anon I gtg. Send me a chapter will you?"
>went better than expected

>>4831037
>thinking you won that encounter
Did you run up the stairs using your hands for extra speed after?

>>4831153
lol epic xD

>>4831153

>deerskinner

Is that like The Deerslayer, anon?

0/10 go back to /b/

But in all fairness, your jest was otherwise sublime and I received much joy from its indulgence.

>>4829264
>tfw people scoff at you and you bust your bottle on the curb and stick it in their face and spit on them

>mfw filthy cunt says lolita is their favorite novel

>>4831163
That sort of thing happened to me when I went to public high school.

>>4829278
Oh shit, you got me, who are you?

>>4831227
amerifat?

>>4831171
nah man i won that one. they were trying to look cool and ended up in an embarrassing situation. maybe i was in said embarrassing situation too but w/e. and i wasnt autistc, i just never talked or interacted with anyone hardly at all during school because i had strong depression.

>>4831223
I've been called a disgusting pedofile for reading Lolita by a chick who read the book herself.

>reading
>you preparing for something anon?
>every time

I keep responding to them by yes, since after some attempts to reveal the activity only produces some emotionless gaze. If I say that I am, indeed, reading a book, it seems that their head doesn't understand it, it's like I become some anomaly and soon after they find escape for their attention they forget it, only to appear once more with the same question. Here, a fit guy with prepossessing looks sits thinking or is engaging in a conversation, suddenly a question appears: 'Do you have facebook?,'; No, I respond. This wasn't a single occasion, and I swear, in one of the asking I saw fear, like he took me for an alien.

>>4831262
no one cares what a special snowflake you are.

>>4831250

lel that's ridiculous

>>4828435
Crazily, I never have anything like this happen.

The joys of being in a decent graduate school, I guess. Everyone is actually intelligent and well-read and looking down on someone for reading a book is the furthest thing from anyone's mind.

>>4831262
What is humility?

>>4830946
>Implying insulting a re-skinned human is bad.

By telling her how stupid she is, you are giving her the equality they crave so much of being treated like anyone else.

>sitting on a bench reading a book between classes
>men and women walking past me constantly
>none of them stop to ask me what i'm reading
>none of them stop to make fun of me for reading
>none of them know i even exist

>>4831338
iktf
it's okay though. i'm a pleb and i wouldn't have anything interesting to say to anyone that'd be worth their time.

>>4831338
Nice cloaking field

>>4831227
oh, high school. See, to me, Freshman means first year of University. That's where I slipped up.

>>4831338
Your thought doesn't you exist. Aside that, why even bother to imply their opinion, are you some kind of loser?

>>4830946
I posted one of the stories in this thread, and I can assure that I have regretted my actions every single moment during which my penis is not in an attractive girls mouth/vagina.

Is it just me or is this possibly the most embarrassing story in the thread?

>>4831383
The story of the man who couldn't link to posts on 4chan? Undoubtedly.

But that's one of his very best stories you utter pleb

No I think this one is the worst.

>>4831139
>allot
You're in no place to be critiquing others' tastes in literature, anon.

>>4831385

>>4828435
>ate lunch with friends (one of which is my roommate) and we all end up coming back to our dorm to hang out for a bit
>(QT)"Oh anon, you like to read? what are all those books on your shelf about?"
>"umm, basically literary fiction, and a couple non-fiction books"
>(QT)"Wow, literary fiction is literally the worst genre. What are you thinking?"
>"What, are you kidding me?"
>(QT)"Gross, anon, this all just looks like terrible stuff we had to read in high school and for my English class. you ought to read better stuff, have you read 'Divergent?"

>tfw qts never like my books

>>4831407
To become a pleb and suffer self-loathing in order to plow pussy? Or to hold one's integrity and forgo the delights of women entirely?

Clearly this is the intellectual's greatest quandary.

>>4831411
Well put, anon; however, one of my sister's friends (2 years younger than me) doesn't 'like' the books I read, but is rather impressed by them and apparently is trying to step up her reading now.

When I was home for break recently, my sister had told me that she heard me hating on some genre fiction over Christmas break when she was spending the night and that she was embarrassed because that is (was?) her favorite genre to read.

>mfw I'm shaping a 17 year old girls opinion on literature and definitely going to need to "plow pussy" (as you so eloquently put it) since she's apparently trying to impress me

Is this one a keeper, or do you really need someone who's not so easily influenced?

>>4831423
She's 17, it would be weird if she wasn't easily influenced.

>>4831411
Nice spooks you've got there

>>4831429
>She's 17, it would be weird if she wasn't easily influenced
Yea, I suppose that's fair. Sounds good to me.

>>4831411
It's 100% possible because we are actually primates.

>>4831329
The girl ins OP's story actually had better taste than him though.

>>4828435
>>She asks mine
>>"Mystery, but I love horror too."
How come you are better?

m-my favorite is The Whisperer in Darkness.

>>4831423
You build yr own gf's tastes b ;)

This one is 100% real and it happened last weekened.

>with (plebby) friends, talking, drinking, etc.
>they start talking about books and their fucking awful artsy pose
>a male friend says he's reading Montecristo and that he's loving it
>mfw I can't believe what I'm hearing
>praise him for reading something different than the shitty vampire romance he's always reading (Twilight is his favorite book)
>he looks annoyed and wants and explanation
>"I-I'm just saying one should make time for high and lowbrow lit in balanced measures, to get something more out of literature... a-and Dumas was rather more elaborate and quite the master"
>he's obviously offended and asks if I think he only reads shitty books
>"...I've read Stephen King, mind you"
>Oh my god oh my god oh my god. I keep my mouth shut.
>"What's the matter anon? We all read all kinds of different book. Don't you think King is good?"
>mfw they haven't even read Camus or Dostoevsky
>"I don't read Stephen King, sorry".
>everyone looks at me in awe as if I had just thrashed the God of Fine Literature


I've learnt my lesson, I'll never discuss books openly.
They pestered me for half an hour about the merits of genre and young adult fiction, and even lent me a copy of the Darktower series by King.

>>4832090
It's ok, anon, I know this feel all too well.

>be at "honors fraternity" part with one of my friends
>house is too full and I'm trying to help qt find a place to "use the facilities"
>their neighbor ends up telling us (along with some other friends) to go over to his apartment and use the restroom there
>we all go over, everyone relieves themselves, etc.
>looking around, bored for a bit, see bookshelf
>ALL Stephen King and some Artemis bullshit
>We head back over to party
>Friend: "Woah man, you have really good reading material over there!"
>"Oh yea, King? He's all I read now, I don't even have a television anymore, he's such a fantastic writer."
>"Do you think he's going to go down in the books along with Rowling?"
>"Anon, don't you just love them?"

>mfw the whole time
I thought this was supposed to an honors college party, I think they were mostly STEMfags though, what a shame.

w2c more pretentious friends?

>>4832135
Probably online, unless you're planning to go to graduate school.

Since we all seem to be starved for /lit/erate friends, should we make a /lit/ penpal thread?

>>4831423

>thinking your woman needs to be smart

women are for fucking, bearing your children, and cooking and cleaning. I have friends that I can talk to about books, and if your wife isn't so busy with chores that she has time to read your household is going to shit.

>all this pretention
>faggots thinking they've attained the ultimate power level from reading Wittgestein, Proust or shitty HORROR writers
>dissing 'plebs'
>0 humility

I've learned -through the hard way- that even if people think you are the smartest, someone better than you will can and you'll probably feel the same things you wished upon the plebs around you.

Save yourself the remorse by not being a shitty human being.

>>4829735
reeeekktkkt

>>4831153

>>4828471
>Call of Cthulhu
I'm glad you backed out of the conversation because that chick did not deserve to be burdened by a faggot as profoundly gay as you.

>>4832135
So, basically, America is so full of plebs that intellectuals feel that much alienation...?

Intellectual-types in my country are very sociable and most start by making friends at university. And I'm not talking about posers, I'm talking about mature people that know, at the very least, how to carry a rational argument.
I think it's got something to do with the boom of politics and how reading about them has made better people out of them.


My own 'intellectual' group of friends are a bunch of well-read liberals and dopeheads I met online over 10 years ago. With them I can speak about art films and serious books and crazy theories of how to destroy/save the world.

>>4832251
It's really not as bad as /lit/ makes it out to be.

I met all my well-read acquaintances in university as well. And this was a rural, relatively small state university. But there were still people who could talk about much, much more than Harry Potter and the Hunger Games. Not sure how this many people are managing to bump into exclusively illiterate people at university.

>>4832208
>this slave morality

Elitism is for the masters, the patricians, who know themselves to be superior. Humility is for the plebs who think that by being more moral they become superior. "He that humbleth himself wishes to be exalted."

>>4832277

They probably just go to terrible universities.

>>4831456
top fkn kek.

Are you the guy who said this originally or the other guy who said he was going to steal it?

>>4832315
Neither

>>4832208
Watch Dogville

>>4828997
>smile and go back to reading

Jesus christ, get your life together

>>4831037
>i laugh very loud and exaggeratedly, get up say very loudly to the entire cafeteria to pay attention because *name* is about to say something "REALLY funny and cool!"

Massive nerd detected

>>4832456
Huh? What did I do wrong?

>"Discussing literature" with a qt
>She's tells me she had just finished Looking For Alaska, gushing about how cute John Green is
>I laugh and call her a pleb
>She calls me a pretentious fuck
>I tell her to step it up, recommending that she read Dostoevsky
>A few days later, she tells me that she picked up Crime and Punishment and is "in love"
>She asks me for literary recs from then on

hipster victory

>>4831227
Same. I may have overdone it though, I used to read during recess and lunch, and I'd literally read while walking home.

>>4832208
Whenever I meet a better read, more patrician person than myself I keep my ears open and see what they reccomend and get ideas for my own reading, so I can keep bettering myself.

Only plebs get offended at finding better read/smarter people than themselves.

>>4828471
let me guess, the necronomicon and charles ward, the 2nd and third, you've never bethered to completely read further,also how the fuck you think a canonic mythos book is boring and pleb? you're retarded

>>4832536
>Dostoevsky
>"stepping it up"
fucking plebs

>>4829726
>being human
you're failing in it, have you ever live outside your basement?

>>4830058
>racism
>bad
>century XIX
nigga please

>>4831134
>2014
>submissive woman
I'mm glad you're happy with your waifu

>>4831134
You know, Ferengi women don't even wear clothes

you could totally take a page from their laws

>>4833250
>>4833261
>>4833269
>>4833285

>>4832536
>and then I woke up

>>4831329
Too bad I only date smart high IQ (150+) girls.

>>4828435

..?

You're both plebs for thinking that simply reading fiction makes you anything more than consumers of entertainment.

Your power level? It's very, very low.

Way to tank with the girl.

Ya blew it.

>>4830830

I hope you get the "/lit/ qt" you've always wanted, and realize that you would rather have just been with somebody funny and sweet, rather than somebody privy to the latest academic and literary debates.

Woody Allen made a movie called Annie Hall about this.

>>4832208
where do you go from proust and wittgenstein that doesn't sacrifice quality for obscurity cred?

>>4831124

>le funny [intensifies] theme!
>jews did it jews did it jews did it

Jesus christ, what happened to /lit/ the past few months? Did /pol/ just start raiding on a daily basis to troll threads? Surely nobody who actually reads literature is idiotic enough to make generalizations about entire races of people.

>>4833398

/thread.

>at uni
>in group of largely STEM
>drinking
>one english grad student
>we don't know each other, friend of a friend
>after the topic of his field comes up, conversation turns to books
>I'm at the edge of the table, actually had just put my book on the floor
one friend says to another how she LOOOOVED that john green book she was lent a month ago
>mfw it takes a month to work through a YA novel
>talk about Fault in Our Stars, JK Rowling, etc
>Grad student is physically in pain
>thesis is something to do with versification
>smiles and nods along
>it seems socially acceptable enough to pop out of the conversation and continue reading my copy of Thomas Mann's The Magic Mountain
>still talking about bestseller filler
>sees the spine of the my book
>lock eyes
>share a knowing look, entirely understand each other's situation
>goes back to conversation

it was like a secret message of one another's power level

>>4833398
We all appreciate your fascinating diatribe on the nature of romantic relationships in the 21st century, we really do. Clearly nobody on this board, bar you of course, has ever been in a relationship, and you are in the unique and lofty position of being able to hand out fraternal advice like the older brother we never had. Clearly my story wasn't intended as a testament to the effects of incredible amounts of alcohol on human inhibition, and on my ability to differentiate between potential sexual partners and those with which I can have anthropological and literary discourse, but rather, a veiled, naive cry for help, symptomatic of a problem that only you, wise as you are in ways of women, are qualified to remedy. Thank you. My eyes have been literally opened.

>>4833533
>My eyes have been literally opened.

>>4833536
>Maybe if I make people on this internet forum aware that I missed the joke they'll think I'm clever and well-read and invite me into the fold

>>4833533
My eyes have been literally opened since this morning.

>>4833551
>>4833536
You're both fucking idiots.

>>4833533

Word salad, man. I know you're just being facetious, but you aren't all that as a literary type yourself. Experience is the best teacher, and if you isolate yourself from dating girls just because they like popular fiction, you might miss out on big experiences, big ideas.

>>4833558
WELL DONE. YOU ARE LITERALLY CONFIRMED TO HAVE MISSED THE ENTIRE POINT OF MY POST.

>>4833558
Now I have contemplated and experienced everything there is to appreciate in this complex and gratuitous life we live in, and as such I gawk. This is truly a lowly form of depreciative behavior, one that lacks an intellectually stimulating argument or rebuttal to the convoluted point poised.
I presuppose that your dossier includes transgressing the daily electrical vision tubing inquisitiveness for merrymaking, which you shall nevermore experience, among other unintelligent enterprises. You will deteriorate and comatose in life while I transcend into the ranks of accustomed gentlemen.
In no architectural way could you ever form a response worthy of discourse, with such a toximble vocabulary you adhere to. As a farewell transcript inhibiting ruthfull yet fallacious diction of the Hygienevangelist degree, I subsequently yet erroneously incept the message of transcribe a book forthright into your mind and digest it's pure, unfiltered wisdom into an uncultured brain such as yours
I hope This facilitation consolidates your ameliorate ways and heeds further converse between the proletariat among the higher class.

>>4833558
ALSO: GOOGLE WHAT SARCASM IS. IT WILL LITERALLY BLOW YOUR MIND.

>>4833398
Woody Allen also fucked his underage adopted daughter.

>TFW my girlfriend is far more patrician than me, is working on her PhD in English Language and Literature and refuses to ever talk about anything academic with me because I'm so pleb compared to her.
>TFW I feel like I'm her pet to use for cuddles and emotional support
>TFW I stay because the sex is fucking amazing as she literally mind breaks during sex and goes full Ahego.

I'm basically stuck on the opposite end of everyone here.

>>4833561
>>4833567

Ease up.

Listen, you're the one who was completely obnoxious to some girl. You revealed your pride to her. In wine there is truth, and your true thought came to the table- namely, that you think you're the cat's meow for having read a little bit, that you think you could never be happy with somebody who doesn't read the same stuff you do. You need to relinquish this idea. By the way, she's a biomed student, so she could work you under the table when it comes to science and math. But she probably wasn't gonna let that get in the way of her liking you.

I'll give you an example. When I was in college, I met a very special girl in my English class. She was the eccentric one who plastered her books with thousands of post-it notes, always spoke up in class discussions, had her own style... but she loved your Harry Potters and whatever else.

Well, I thought I was going to end up with this other girl in the class, because she was so patrician. She would sit outside and smoke cigarettes while reading Joyce and wearing her stocking tights. I quickly found out that she was stilted in conversation and awful to talk to, because she was obsessed with cultivating that "2deep4u" literary-type vibe.

The bubbly, cute girl ended up being my girlfriend, and, despite her having not read Plato and Chaucer and Wilde, I was able to love her. And, by the way, she was perfectly willing to lie in bed with me and read aloud the Euthyphro and the Miller's Tale and the Happy Prince.

She taught me all kinds of things about myself and the nature of love.

The upshot is: don't be a dilettante, admit that you're a student, and be open to experience.

>>4833565
le patrician face

I can't get over the fact that some of you legitimately would worship the ground any semi-literate "qt" walked on if it meant she gave you any attention. Makes me wish some of you had put in more effort to get laid in high school so you realize what a joke most bitches are.

>>4833551

B-but Butterfly, do you not blink?

>>4833634
WOW, THIS POST IS LITERALLY HILARIOUS, IF ONLY FOR THE OVERWHELMING NUMBER OF ASSUMPTIONS IT MAKES.
>in wine there is truth
>IMPLYING

>you think you're the cat's meow for having read a little bit, that you think you could never be happy with somebody who doesn't read the same stuff you do
>IMPLYING IMPLYING

>so she could work you under the table when it comes to science and math.
>LOTS OF GREAT ASSUMPTIONS HERE

THE REST OF THIS PSEUDO-BIOGRAPHICAL PREACHING IMPLIES THE MOST HILARIOUS ASSUMPTION OF THEM ALL, WHICH IS THAT YOU HONESTLY THINK ANYBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOU OR YOUR LIFE.

>>4829325

It's one thing to do it on the internet where it's just pointless, but doing it in real life is almost objectively stupid.

>>4829931

>You've ran out of places to run to
>This is actually the right board for this shit

IT'S OGRE

>>4831153

a good way to own someone who tries to own you is to just say "what" like you don't know what he said maybe 3-4 times then just go "oh haha" like a polite half laugh after. it's important not to say anything after the "oh haha" or try to change the topic afterwards. you need to let it hang. if you eye the guy like you're butthurt during this period you lose so don't do that either. if the other guy is good at what he does this won't work always but most people don't know shit anything so this works on them.

hope this helps the retarded guy who gets mocked by teens

>>4828435
I like the Color out of Space, one of my favorites of his.

I'm not sure liking horror/mystery makes you any less of a pleb tbh.

>>4833643
yar

>>4828435

Not your blog

>>4831423
Who cares?

She's well past her physical prime.

>>4833643

>Work out for two months 3 to 4 times a week
>Spend 2 days a month tanning outside so you're not so fucking pasty white
>Pick up a hobby you'll be fucking passionate about that you can show off with
>Pick up a different hobby you'll be fucking passionate about that you can talk about at length
>Shower every day, buy a cologne, get clothing that fits you
>Join organizations or go to places where you know there'll be girls
>Talk to said girls

The moment I did all of the above, guess what happened? I started getting laid. I don't care how /lit/ you are guys, there's zero excuse to be a wizard in this day and age.

>>4833412
Plenty of people that wrote literature made generalizations about entire races of people. If it's right most of the time, doesn't that justify a prejudice?

>>4833461
What did his cock taste like?

>>4833862

It tasted like Pynchon's prose

And sweat.

But mostly the prose.

I am a spider, do not trust what I say.

>>4833921
Okay.

>>4833938

Butterfly was a spider the whole time. You think you know a guy.

>>4833916

So it tasted awful?

>>4833942
Spreading rumors!

>>4833845
I can't wait to talk to girls about my love for grand strategy games and my knowledge of obscure European rulers. Thanks for the help anon!

>>4833952
>Not hiding your power level

>>4833952

It literally doesn't matter what the 'what' is: It's having passion for something and enthusiasm on a topic that's important. Even esoteric knowledge makes you unique and shows you care about something.

Maybe they won't relate on subject matter, but the vast majority of people will respect a passionate person.

>>4833974

>Not showing off your power level

It's like you want to be a wizard.

>>4833952
>Roommate brings over her QT3.14 friend
>I'm playing GRID
>She says "Oh you like video games, what stuff do you like"
>Just to hide power level and to name stuff I assume she would know I just say, "oh, the normal stuff, Skyrim, Call of Duty.. you know" (I actually hate Skyrim and CoD)
>She goes "oh... I've been playing this game called Crusader Kings 2 for months now and have hundreds of hours into it, If you want to get into strategy games, its a pretty good one"
>She then walks off with her friend

>Pic related, my Britannia at the time she asked that question.

>>4833952

>>4834000
You fool OP. Even plebs nowadays know COD is shit.

/lit/ this is one of the most cringe worthy threads I've ever seen
Be proud of yourselves

>>4834022

That was the entire point of the thread, powerlevel induced cringing and gf's.

John, you are the cringe.

What the fuck is wrong with "The Color out of Space" ?

>>4834028
but john isn't my name ;_;

>>4834036

>Being this new

>>4834000
If you're gonna lie about what you're into you really shouldn't race straight to the bottom. It's gotta be something you can actually talk about if they pick up on it. I'd have gone for something like Civ V. People are aware of it if they're aware of anything and sure this particular girl would call you a pleb but bam!, ice broken.

>>4834040

If you like something and want to feel where they are, remember, one power level hint, one midtier, one pleb.

An example of a good list of favorite books could be "Hunger games, House of the Scorpion, Infinite Jest and Plato's Republic", for example.

Plebs have an out to talk about Hunger Games or to switch the conversation to film, well read persons might recognize you reading books outside the hoi poloi favorite list, and patricians will start a philosophical discussion or will be in tune to your power level.

>in the library checkin out my facebook notifications
>hipster looking chick comes up to me and asks about some book on my table
>she says she loves james juice or some shit like that
>tell her the books not mine
>shes cute though so I walk out with her
>ask her if shes seen neighbors
>said she's not really into "that kinda stuff"
>I'm bored as fuck at this point.
>follow her back to her place
>walk in the door uninvited
>she starts looking at me weird but I take my pants off
>she sees me and cant resist because I'm pushing her head down
>fuck her and leave when her roommate is coming home
hipster bitches suck in bed fyi

>haven't learned to communicate telepathically yet
>calling other people plebs
Jesus Christ, has /lit/ always been this bad?

>>4833952
>I can't wait to talk to girls about my love for grand strategy games and my knowledge of obscure European rulers.
Oh hey...
>...strategy games...
Oh... nm

>>4831037
>Not scarying bullies with a gutural voice from hell because you play in a Death/Doom Metal band.

>>4834062
butterfly i had the best game of crusader kings2 ever. i came from a long line of saints in salerno and then this fucking guy roger somehow married my sister and i was devastated because i think he's inbred.

so many weeks :-:

>>4834000
Jesus Christ, what is even your goal? World conquest? I bet you started as a king, too.

>>4831407
oh man
Divergent is terrible, I can't imagine someone the age of 14 enjoying it

>>4834074
Fuck, wrong one.

>>4832536
>this happened

>>4833678

Whatever, dude. Have fun bombing when you try to get a girlfriend.

>>4833678

>THE MOST HILARIOUS ASSUMPTION OF THEM ALL, WHICH IS THAT YOU HONESTLY THINK ANYBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOU OR YOUR LIFE.

I love it when people bash out irony like this in caps. It is so beautiful is its perfectly crystallized autismus.

>>4834036
This made me laugh more than it should.

>>4834022
Only when moot says it is. moot? You there, you cringy little bastard?

>>4833634
>Well, I thought I was going to end up with this other girl in the class, because she was so patrician. She would sit outside and smoke cigarettes while reading Joyce and wearing her stocking tights. I quickly found out that she was stilted in conversation and awful to talk to, because she was obsessed with cultivating that "2deep4u" literary-type vibe.
But I could take pictures of this one and put her on my tumblr....

;^)

>>4828448

>>4830865
>>4830865
> I'll happily make a fool out of myself to fuck with someone.
r u Fyodor Karamazov

>>4830865
>tfw sometimes I deliberately fall down in public and then act like I'm super embarrassed, get up and sprint away as fast as I can

>the storybooks I read are better than the storybooks you read

>>4828435
I love these threads

>>4830865
>tfw you do this so often you start to wonder if you might actually be autistic

>sitting in the back of the bus
>6/10 gets on the bus and starts reading Game of Thrones
>I instantly assume she's trying to attract beta orbiters

Also:

>see a hot girl reading the unbearable lightness of being
>I don't really know what it's about but I think it's kind of patrician
>instantly hate her for trying to pretend to be a patrician when she's probably just a chad dick guzzler who's such an awful human being that she has to try to butt in on being an intellectual
>she isn't even doing it for beta orbiters

Also:

>go to waterstones
>buy books since they smell better and are better to hold than pirated stuff on my kindle
>instantly feel like a pleb for paying money for books
>feel like the cashiers see me as a fucking pleb for not pirating, even though I wasn't buying pleb books

>>4835586

Also:

>buy cheap books from charity ship
>feel large feeling of inner peace

>>4835578
>yfw you're roleplaying your true self

Didn't Zizek have this rant where he goes on about how the way you act in videogames is more like the real you than the way you act in real life because you don't repress your character or something? I can't find it.

>>4835595
http://youtu.be/k-0VMnFmnL0?t=3m10s

3:10

>>4835553
You don't know shit faggot

One time I pretended to accidentally put my hand up a little girls skirt and was sent to prison for 6 years, just to fuck with people.

How do you even notice people looking at you, or talking about you when you read. I'm always to absorbed into my reading.

>>4835561

Seriously, plebs priding themselves on reading fiction... you're novel a shit, you're "parician" a shit, you're LIFE a fucking SHIT.

>>4831407
>>"umm, basically literary fiction"

>>4828997
Are you a Russian Prince?

>>4833777

That's some true stuff right there. Slick talk. Reminds me of some of the techniques my black buddies would use in the American South back in high school. Nobody could ever best them in insults because they would throw down the smokescreen and confuse the hell out of their opponent.

>>4835586
>>4835589

Mate, re-evaluate your life.

>beta orbiters
>chad dick guzzler

What the hell, man?

You are basically describing how you cast unfounded judgments upon people.

And then you have the gall to pretend you're the moral one.

>>4833565
u wot m8?

>>4833634
No one cares about your life.

>>4833610

Oh so that must make him a terrible writer/director

Jej #fallacious

>>4835586
Holy shit.
Get help.
I'm not trying to insult you or anything, I just really think you need to realize some shit.

You people are fucking shallow. A cover and blurb throw you for a loop because it's not James Joyce.

Carlton Mellick III is one of the most cringeworthy authors of this century. He's worse than a lot of fanfiction authors I read. I've read through about half of his library of work and he just gets worse every time.

Quicksand House is fucking retarded. It's just fedoracore, lolsorandumXD humor and edgy violence. It starts out with foreveralone feels bullshit then segues awkwardly with ludicrous speed into weak horror. It's one of those books where the funniest parts are the bits you're supposed to be scared of.

Cuddly Holocaust was worse. The point when the Carebears were chewing human flesh and the green army men were murdering people, it can hardly get more randumXD.

Satan Burger is shite.

Hammer Wives is a pathetic Poe/Lovecraft knock-off. Just awful.

Warrior Women of the Wasteland is pretty much a feminazi fallout 3

Cannibals of Candyland is weak and unfunny.

Apeshit / Clusterfuck are a tired old rehashing of cheesy slasher horror movies that goes off the map and again substitutes stupid randomness for humor. Intestines as weapons, that's all I can say.

And Baby Jesus Butt Plug is just another laughable attempt to be shocking.

Bizarro is: Franz Kafka meets John Waters, Dr. Suess of the post-apocalypse, Takashi Miike meets William S. Burroughs, Alice in Wonderland for adults, Japanese animation directed by David Lynch.

You don't read Bizarro because you're after Pride and Prejudice or Great Expectations. It's for those people who watch House of 1000 Corpses, Machete, Cabin in the Woods, Meet the Feebles, Southland Tales, Tetsuo The Ironman, and Holy Mountain all merged together and written into words. It's cheap, dirty, fun. Gores, violence, horribly disturbing sex, blasphemy, and pop culture satire.

And yet he reads like a fanfic author. He's an amatuer. I'm just surprised he never mentions sporks.

Here's a complete list of everything: Carlton Mellick III http://carltonmellick.com/books/

>>4835586
oh, /r9k/.

>>4836265


go to bed carl

>>4833634
thanks, was worth a read

>>4835586
This is exactly the mental process I imagine for the following
- /pol/, /int/, /v/
- typical /lit/ tripfag

>>4836265
what model was used for the cover

>>4835561
>he reads non-fiction
>poses an invalid argument
top kek

>>4836106
>you're
>you're LIFE
It looks like you don't know how to write.
Also, it's not a matter of pride (projecting much?)


All this poorly thought WHITE/BLACK criteria coming from "serious readers".
I can now see exactly why so many c/lit/s hate /lit/.

>>4836393

>It looks like you don't know how to write.

God damn, lurk more.

>>4836396
I've been in /lit/ from the start. You're telling me I need to interpret poorly written crap (which abounds given our non-native speakers) as some meta shit?

Please.

>>4828435
>not telling her anything but The Music of Erich Zann is unacceptable

>>4836134
I'm pretty sure he's just describing how /lit/ has ruined him.

>>4836424

You must not be very observant, then.

"you're ___ a shit" is a phrase that has come to the fore, originally posted as "you're waifu a shit". There's a banner gif where Dexter reads that post then destroys his desktop computer.

So, basically, lurk the fuck more.

>>4833631

you will be broken

>>4836424
>being this new

>>4836479
>implying I've browsed /a/ ever since I discovered literature (and /lit)
top kek indeed

>>4836543

>all this damage control

Nigga, the phrase in question gets posted all the time on /v/, /tv/, /ck/, /mu/... seriously, you just need to lurk more.

>>4836555
Why the fuck would anyone go to those places? /lit/ doesn't openly mix with posters from there.

>>4836555
But I don't browse those boards.

You're basically
- not recognizing the fact that people on /lit/ commit that mistake honestly in no meem-related way (and in any English-language site for that matter)
- telling me I need to learn more about stuff I don't care about

If I'm to lurk moar then I ask you to grow up and think for yourself.
Also, pay more attention to the kind of users /lit/ gets. You seem to know little about them.

>>4836615
>go to strange tribe
>refuse to familiarise yourself with the customs
>get mad at them for taking offence at this
>throw a hissy fit about other cultures being inferior and tell them to grow up into a bore just like you

typical middle class crypto-fascist.

>>4836555

There isn't a huge amount of regular c/lit/ crossposters

>>4836628

>>4836628
But those aren't /lit/'s customs ...

>>4836628
>refuse to familiarise yourself with ALL its silly customs
ftfy

>get mad at them for taking offence at this
Perhaps you should re-read your first response: >>4836396
>God damn, lurk more.


How did I ever get mad?

>Talking about what you like.
>Bragging about the answers.
Hell, the world isn't revolving around your fat ego. Next time, talk about things she likes and if you can, advice her on what she should read. And people wonder why most of the relations are miserable !

>>4836653
yes /lit/ is culturally unique and isolated and not influenced by its bordering countries amirite?

fucking nazi

>>4836656
that's not even my post.

on 4chan 'Anonymous' is different people. fucking immature right

>>4831423
my friend has two hairless dogs and those motherfuckers are gross. they smell awful, plus they're assholes

>>4836667
It's pretty obviously not influenced by that particular one, which is what's being argued about. Go to England and get this buttmad when people think you're odd for eating frogs.

Wait, wait waaaaait.
You where a faggot to a girl just because she liked a story you don't?
I...
How
You
I am geniunely curious:
Do you train to be so much of a absolute fucking faggot, or it comes naturally?

>>4836677
>whines about memes
>lelelele butthurt anal destructivated epic xD

>>4836670
You're very funny, but you're still not explaining how I got mad, or where the temper was, or where did I ever imply those 'cultures' were inferior.

Not caring about something does not equate to deeming them inferior, you ninny.


Is this greentext thing all about making logical mistakes, self-righteous declarations, baseless judgements and saying dumb things? You see, I'm new to 4chan.


>don't mock OUR internet culture
>muh sense of belonging
>anonymous fo' life

>>4836123
LOL, I can't believe I remembered that reference

>be at a party but no friends there
>take out a book, J.G. Ballard's Crash, and pretend I do not want to leave
>qt 7/10 comes up and asks "What is that book about, anon?"
>I am seized with fear from my severe social anxiety (I can't help it). I shake a little and wet my pants slightly.
>"Hmm? Let me see-"
>“Two months before my accident, during a journey to Paris, I had become so excited by the conjunction of an air hostess's fawn gaberdine skirt on the escalator in front of me and the distant fuselages of the aircraft, each inclined like a silver penis towards her natal cleft, that I had involuntarily touched her left buttock.”
>Suddenly, it happens: The smallest strand of spaghetti has teased itself out of my pocket. More follow. Soon a river of spaghetti is flowing out of my very being and I am consumed by there is no more "I". A timeless moment of euphoria ensure. Pasta flows out of my guts. It flows into her mouth. It flows into my skull. It disengages my eyeballs. I lose myself in sign exchange and postsexual death. I am become jouissance.
>When I regain lucidity I am humping her leg on the floor, covered in beer. I am forcing my fingers in her mouth and muttering something about cool ranch doritos.
>Her boyfriend gives beats the shit out of me and breaks two of my ribs.
>It was worth it.

>>4836168
I recognize that you can't understand me. That's fine really, as I do use usual words that make me look different. However, this is no excuse for a swine like you to attack and berate my proper syntax for you truly ignore that argumentative words at my forefingers and palm.
Tis' not the time of day to berath me of my inner devil, shall I belittle the phonemes you construct into a transqualliarain placed script unto my brain, barring all access towards quattle matters towards yourself
If nevermore shan't I predispose of myself onto this converse bentlee two gentlemen of the highest nature than betrused am I, the naysayer of all protruding from the eternal snatch of lies
I fortelling you fascistic pig towards exiting yourself and laying distance away from my pasbiatin logic and prowess.

>>4836742

oh lord please help /lit/

>>4836710
Telling people to grow up is a clear sign of having no better rebuttal and comes with inherent frustration. You implied those cultures were inferior by considering acquainting yourself with them unworthy of your time yet you're still willing to utilise them. You're like a fat yank loudly screaming hamburger orders in a Parisian restaurant.

>>4834860
BUT THAT'S MY POINT. I HAVE HAD GIRLFRIENDS IN THE PAST, AND WILL DO AGAIN IN THE VERY NEAR FUTURE. I WAS A CUNT ONCE WHEN I WAS INCREDIBLY DRUNK. IT IS IN NO WAY INDICATIVE OF HOW I USUALLY ACT TOWARDS WOMEN.

I WOULD HAVE NOT BEEN AT A CLUB IN THE FIRST PLACE IF I WAS A SOCIAL RETARD.

>>4836758

so you didn't go to a club?

>>4836761
literally loling

>>4836615

Hey, dipshit, I'm this guy: >>4836396 .

IF this >>4836615 / >>4836710 is honestly how you think, you really don't fit in here, and you should stick to lurking.

Listen to yourself.

HOW AM I MAD?! I JUST TOOK YOUR WORDS AT FACE VALUE! GROW UP! I DIDN'T IMPLY ANYTHING ABOUT CULTURE. LOGICAL ERRORS! DOES NOT COMPUTE!

You've derailed the thread for no reason. If you want to return to the discussion of why reading fiction is for plebs, I'm game. Otherwise, just stop.

Sorry your ass hurts.

>>4836796
Someone sure is butt blasted

>Laughing at girls for having inferior tastes

Why don't you just fiend respect for their shit taste, get into some sort of relationship and turn them on to good literature?

>>4836804

*feign respect

>>4836813
Thanks, bud.

>>4836803

>>4836820

>>4828452
I think the color our of space was one of his more eerie stories.

>>4836750
>Telling people to grow up is a clear sign of having
Yeah, well... never include the words "a clear sign" and the likes in a response because
>implying implications
which I can now see abound in your post.

If you don't have information, then it's better to ask instead of jumping to conclusions. That, in my mind, is what a grown up SHOULD strive for. Therefore my grow up and think for yourself line.

If you don't partially agree with this, then this whole post will be lost on you.

>You implied those cultures were inferior by considering acquainting yourself with them unworthy of your time
That's a very -VERY- thin implication. It's so thin it's almost non-existent. Is that insecurity? flaws in your rational process or what?

Just because I don't care about the medical science does not imply I think doctors are inferior. That also does not negate my eventual desire, need or right to access medical services.

Just because I like posting in /lit/ and have been browsing 4chan for many years even though I'm something of a normalfag, does not mean I want to learn everything about every board or "all" its memes.

Why can't you be less dull?

>>4836826

This is about as persnickety as it gets, ladies and gentlemen.

You need to get laid.

>>4836826
>manages to be condescending while subscribing to an essentialist notion of maturity

Any books like this?

>>4836831

>"...subscribing to an essentialist notion of maturity"

Not even the guy you're insulting, but

>>>/gtfo/

>>4836837
Why?

>>4836796
I was simply trying to carry a rational discussion. Yes, in 4chan. Over the Internet. Whatever dumb rebuttal you can come up.

>OH MY GOD IS THAT GUY FOR REAL
Yes, I'm for real. I, for one, actually think this is possible in /lit/, and /lit/ alone. That's one of the reasons I come here.

I've seen so many tripfags derail good threads in the past with their fascist totalitarian crap about culture life and what not, I thought why not give it a try, and a twist, of course. I must have caught nihilism or something.


From your recurrence to memes, 'out of my secret club' replies, etc. I think you keep trying to troll me without realizing I'm fully expecting that. I tried to sound rational and as unequivocal as my command of English allowed, yet I keep getting these superficial rebuttals that address nothing of what I really said. What's ironic is that I've glimpsed actually elaborate attempts and something of an effort in these replies.

>>4836265
You've spammed this before.

I'm sorry bizarro has run it's course and your books don't sell anymore.

Well this is quite a shitshow.

>>4829264
>People respond to, and are unnerved by, confidence. It's something that people seriously underestimate; confidence makes all the difference
You're absolutely right friend.
>Be me 5'10 stick bug thin beta fag.
>These two hipster faggots approach me while I'm walking home from work.
>"Excuse my sir my friend and I got turned around, could y-" he didn't get to finish his sentence. I cracked him across the jaw with a monkey wrench.
>His half black boyfriend was just standing there gawking like the pretentious faggot I knew he was. I doomed the ultra liberal cunt before he could collect himself.
>Fell to the black top crying like a bitch.
>went through their pockets.

>>4836887

*its course

>>4836874
>makes honest newfag mistake
>gets notified of it
>spends the rest of his day trying to refute it

Just accept it, man. We where all knew ones.

>>4831280

girls can't be pedophiles you silly

>>4836897
You had a close call there friend, but you did good. I bet those pretentious faggots never dared to bully you again.

>In English class yesterday
>supposed to be working on poetry presentation but putting it off by reading and English teacher doesn't care
>he comes by asks what I'm reading
>White Noise -- Delillo
>He mentions DFW
>I say started reading this book because DFW mentioned it in an essay
>we talk about DFW for 10 minutes
>his silent approval as he walks away

>be in hospital for 2 weeks because intestinal surgery
>reading Brothers Karamazov at the time
>anesthesiologist walks in the room
>sees book, says that he knows about it but hasn't read it.
>a couple days later this old, sweet lady chaplain comes in
>sees book, says that she knows about it, says something about "very intellectual".
>in both cases I just sort of deflect it; "Yeah I just started it really but its pretty good so far etc."

Not Available is still their best album because

1) It's amazing
2) They are actually being sincere. Albums like Commercial Album and Meet the Residents are sarcastic and parody pop culture, but when they actually go to work in a serious, artistic way, their genius shows.

>having a favorite genre
you're both retarded

>>4837622
l'autisme

>>4837409
This never happened

>>4837638
it happened literally yesterday you hoe

>>4831407
I hope you just shrugged and looked her in the eyes before replying: "yeah, well, that's just like your opinion man."

>>4837758
>>4831407
A better response would be:
>"No actually, I graduated middle school over a decade ago. Feel free to retain the tastes of a child your entire life though, I'm not judging."

My gf has read 1984 and American Psycho and Perfume: Story of a Murderer (she prefers the latter two).

How did I do? Should I encourage her to do leisure-time reading?

>>4836578
Hey /ck/ can be ok sometimes... It's like the only other board I go to.

>>4837830
yes, nurture her into patricianhood

>>4837833
Same. /ck/ might be the best board on 4chan overall, though I think /lit/ is the best when at its best.

>>4828435
>hiding your power level
Pleeb.

>>4837845
>good food/drink and good literature.
>anything else.
One of these choices is obviously superior.

>>4837840
Why? How?

>>4829228
autist here and I completely see where you're coming from
fyodor is best karamazov
though I'm also the sort that can let my ego get in the way. whatever

>>4837901
ps op is a fag

>>4837929
stfu faggot

>>4837929
>>4837941
>>4837901
samefag!

>Bump into a girl in the library
>Start talking about literature
>Ask her what her favorite writers are
>She says Vonnegut
>Tell her I’m Vonnegut
>”Oh my Gosh I love your work so much!”
>She shows me her tattoo: ”So it goes.”
>”Yep, I wrote that.”
>We make love that very night

>>4831163

Boy you're sheltered. Even when I went to a high achieving school there were bullies, albeit fewer than at comprehensives.