/lit/ - Literature

>>4804860
qt idealist

idealism is qt and naive

not being a nihilist is girly

>>4804860
who the qt?
>feminist
oh

>>4804860
I know a guy who pretends to be a black female social justice warrior on twitter who had her supporting him for some ridiculous statement he made about how men are evil.

But shes a leftist/feminist so its all dribble, shes a talentless hack

She can write sort of well but her views are just embarrassing to be honest.

>>4804878
>But shes a leftist/feminist so its all dribbles
>says a guy with a trip named after a manchild magician

>>4804900
now this is shitposting

I don't even disagree with her views a lot of the time, but she presents them in such a childish and deliberately obtuse way that I find it difficult to see much merit in her work. There is an incredible amount of exaggeration and emotion in her writing, and her articles frequently read less like social essays and more like fevered whining.

>>4804866
>>4804874
>qt
Fucking really?

>>4804860
I think it has been months without a thread about her, and I would like it to continue that way.

Edgy, man-hating kikess who writes feminist click-bate for The Guardian.

>>4804949
No, not really. Where do you think you are? This is /lit/, there are feminazis to troll

>>4804970
That's ok then. Surely calling her an ugly lesbian would have the same effect though.

>Penny was born in Islington and grew up in Brighton. She is of Irish, Jewish, and Maltese descent. She attended the independent school Brighton College. She has written about her hospitalisation at age 17 for anorexia and subsequent recovery.

Nice that there are still left-wingers left in this neo-liberal world. Starkey got her good, though.

>>4804983
>Guardian and New Statesman writer
>Left wing

She's just your typical social democrat

Her views are mostly nonsense and the odd time she is on point it's presented terribly.

Good fap material though, she's a cute as hell.

>>4804860
Given her outward appearance, I would make the prejudgment that she's probably SJW/10 and a shit tier writer.

>>4804976
Objectifying women is the important part, but you also have to seem as pathetic and reactionary as possible: they already know men are hopelessly attracted to them. Keep up their preconceived notions.

>God tier
Penny Red
Discordia

>Good tier:
Flesh Market
Film/book reviews
New Statesman articles
political essays

>Shit tier
Anything for vice
Cybersexism
Public debates/lectures
Guardian articles

I dismiss everything she writes as retarded because I failed to get into Oxbridge and I resent her.

I'm not even being ironic. Every time I see her mentioned or read one of her articles I'm overcome by regret. I hate my younger self for lacking the self discipline to harness his latent intellect. I read her articles and I know that I am better than her in every single way, and I know that I will never ever get the chance to prove it because I was a stupid fucking child.

>>4805039
>getting into Oxbridge is the be all and end all
A*AAA, didn't even apply. Fight me in real life

>>4805039
Sort of know that feeling, except I despise Oxbridge and everything it stands for.

>>4805080
No, don't get the wrong idea, I hate it too. I hate the fact that you look up any well-known British figure, any celebrity, anyone in a position of power, any comedian, any journalist or author, and indeed, anyone known for their intelligence, and inevitably they went to Oxford or Cambridge.


I suppose I'm just bitter, but it seems like a form of academic nepotism, a bunch of people jerking off each other to further their careers because they drank together at University.

>>4805039
Jesus christ I know that feeling.

>>4805101
Nah, it's not bitter. Just recognising the reality of class society m8.

>>4805101
Brian Cox didn't though

>>4805136
>Cox's parents were bankers[1] and he attended the independent Hulme Grammar School[24]

He didn't need to

>>4804860
I think that she was better playing for Atlético, instead of Manchester City. No, jesus, she looks like Kun Agüero, how can this... thing exist and not be shot?

>>4805101
It's not all nepotism, it's not as though they'd get in to Oxbridge if they weren't highly intelligent and motivated.
The majority of people in my family are Oxbridge graduates and any success they've had has not been from connections they made there, as they seem to have very few.

>>4804949
>implying you wouldn't check her privilege

pure dribble

my dad likes her

>>4805201
Stupid people can easily get into Oxbridge, they just have to have no spine and overbearing parents.

shithead

I remember this one time when /pol/ altered her wikipedia so that it said "Jewish, Yiddish and Hebrew" descent, which was then changed to "Jewish, Maltese and Irish" or whatever it is now.

Basically /pol/ outed the fact she was jewish

>>4805279
its not a secret
people outside of autistic cartoon forums aren't afraid of jews

>>4804860
I liked her in Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, but she looks hotter here. Less makeup, prolly.

>>4805290

Is this the moment in which someone posts a Jew caricature rubbing hands and saying good, good goy?

>>4805303
no, because this isn't /pol/

>>4804860
>Laurie Penny

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oj9dA6E3fJw

>>4805309
That video is the only reason I'm aware of that woman

>>4805300

>>4805265
Not necessarily stupid but the vast majority are incredibly mediocre and are arrogant enough not to notice. Those kind of people are the ones who simply must go to the best university in order to satisfy their ego, while people like me are positively repulsed by it even though they get high enough grades

So instead I chose to drown in complete misery for three years while I contemplate what the hell I'm going to do with my life in order to make enough money to house myself, considering I have severe issues with authority and refuse to have an employer

I can't honestly say I made the right choice

>>4805309
What's your favourite dinosaur? I always preferred the Archaeopteryx, the little stubby bird-ancestor, but recently a whole new species has been discovered alive and nesting in the discursive swamps of what was once British political culture. Bigotaurus Ridiculus, a spiny-hided predator, is not yet extinct, and a danger to anyone looking to create progressive change in this country.

The Bigotaurus can be found waddling free in the more exclusive watering-holes of London even in the early years of the 21st century, and although most at home in oak-panelled environments, can often be seen on Newsnight and Question Time hunting the clear-thinking egalitarian agendas on which it feeds when it can't get claret. The creature tricks its victims with a camouflage of adorable sexagenarian buffonery.

When provoked, for example by mentioning issues of tax transparency, this particular dinosaur becomes aggressive, baring the sharp fangs it hides in its ponderous jowls. I found that out during a recent encounter with the beast in its natural habitat. At an education festival this weekend, I spoke on a panel about the meaning of "Britishness" with Professor David Starkey, noted historian and hack, who made the argument that English society has become corrupted by the influence of people from other cultures and races.

Describing himself as a lone "voice in the wilderness" and "saying the unsayable", the Professor, who has often been criticised for making racially divisive statements in public, proceeded to say what windbag ultra-Tory talking heads have been saying openly and obliquely for years – namely, that "real British values" are not, as Starkey put it, "entrenched in the foothills of the Punjab".

When I criticised Starkey for playing xenophobia for laughs, and asked why, as an advocate of Britishness, he lives for part of the year in the United States, the dinosaur showed its claws. Leaping to his feet, Starkey began with a furious ad hominem attack before marching up to me, wagging his finger in my face, shouting abuse, swearing and showering me with flecks of spittle. If you call a bigot a bigot in this country, you can expect to be attacked, but I didn't expect the sheer thuggishness behind Starkey's brand of cosy prejudice to reveal itself so publicly.

Bigotaurus thrives in the temperate climate of Britain. It quenches its thirst for attention at the cesspool of the British media circus, to an audience too deferential to put it in its place. In this country, public debate has become a spiteful, irrelevant Punch-and-Judy show, and professional provocateurs like Starkey are paid to create aggressive spectacle that obscures useful discussion. Like the ancient lizards, Starkey and his kind are perilously ill-adapted to the modern world – but they have yet to be consigned to history where they belong.

>>4805327

>>4805327
What is this text even about?'

Imagine an anon writing this after getting BLOWN THE FUCK OUT by another poster... i mean wtf.

>>4805327
#REKT

>>4805337

>>4805309
wow that guy is a knob

>>4805039
Don't be sorry, bro, I know this feel... but the system is rigged anyway. Even if you work hard, you can't succeed like that.
In France (my country), the equivalent of Oxbridge is Sciences Po. All the Frenchmen with a bit of power or recognition (including Chirac, Sarkozy, Hollande...) come from the "prestigious" school of Sciences Po... So, naturally, I tried the exam to become a great man.
I worked hard, with very small means, and I smoked everyone in the written exam. I had the best marks among 5000 upper class candidates...
Then came the oral exam.
You have nothing to "do" for the oral exam, it's just like a job interview. No knowledge required... So it's easy, huh?
No. They destroyed me. I come from the black-arab ghetto (being a white male), so they asked to worst possible questions to infuriate me. "Why did you never travel abroad?" Because I'm too poor for that, you cunt. "Why did you never had a small job to get money?" Because I'm studying night and day to succeed in life, you cunt. "So you don't even have a job and you want to join the elite?" Okay...
I had zero chance because I didn't fit in. I wasn't the typical young and flexible bourgeois, and I had a strong mind with fresh, aggressive ideas - thus, I was eliminated. My good marks, my wit and my will didn't matter... No hungry dogs in our great Sciences Po.
Conclusion: have no regrets, work against the system. Not like this Laurie Penny minx, who stutters "fuck security" while having a secure Oxbridgian job - but like a true enemy of the bourgeoisie. The rich deserve nothing but pain. Be their pain provider.

>>4805350
>>4805324
You guys wanna become terrorists or something?

>>4805356
Tell me who to bomb

(I feel like for legal reasons I should say this is facetious, but it isn't, but if anyone asks, it is)

Annoying leftie bitch

>>4805309
i couldn't watch it because I was cringing so hard. What's the gist of it?

>>4805382
I feel like we need to get organised. What are some subversive, secular, organisations I can join if I wish to overthrow the current British government?

>>4805309
Guy doesn't portray himself very positively but her backpedaling is hilarious

>>4805036
I... actually agree with that quote.

>>4805039
>people who hate lp long for social mobility and status

boy who would have guessed

nothing more sad than broke ass unachiving conservatards

I'd have sex with her, don't particularly care about her writing. (Attractive) women should stick to being sex objects.

>>4805434
"LP" benefits from a typical Oxbridge high status, while pretending to fight against high status.
This is absolutely unfair and disgusting.

>>4805453
And if she didn't come from high status, she'd be merely jealous of them.

Social classes where people can be left-wing without conservatives pointing out apparent contradictions are yet to be invented.

>Laurie Penny's powerful fat thighs will never ensconce your head and firmly but mercilessly crush your will to resist New Feminism

>>4805453
But I'm not a conservative? :/

>>4805485
Woops, this was meant to reply to >>4805434

Sorry.

>>4805039

I wouldn't worry about it bro.

She's just another cunt whose family prestige and/or wealth got her that place anyway.

Just like that faggot Owen Jones, who pretends to be a man of the people but was in fact the son of a big-noise in the TUC or some shit.

>>4805500
Aren't Owen Jones and LP like bffs?

>>4805505

I believe so.
Or if not they're so often equated with one another they may as well be.

>dont know who laurie penny is
>google her
>see this (pic related)
top kek
i can already tell she is garbage and i havent ever read anything by her

>>4805424
Congrats on realizing that you're retarded.

>>4805424

Then you're fucking stupid.

All of her nonsense is crap that can only come out of a freeloader who assumes that what others had to fight for she can just dismiss as luxury.

WHO NEEDS MONEY DUUURP

What the fuck?

Zero common sense, completely not grounded in reality, utterly lost to a very stupid way of teaching young people at university.

Out of touch with the world to the point where it fucking hurts to see.

>>4805386
This is a serious question though. I think something needs to be done. The French had their revolution. The closest we fucking had was the Newport Rising, and then we kowtowed the moment the British government implemented some shallow reforms. I'm convinced that we'll never be able to move forward as a country until we slough off every vestige of the aristocracy.

>>4805036

>Edge - the quote

>>4805466
No.
You must understand that we low-class people are sick to hear rich twats from Oxbridge telling us what to feel and think, under the pretext they're "left-wing", and more left-wing than us obviously.
It is obscene to see a rich woman telling us that precarity is good (see pic above) while I don't have money to buy new socks.
Soon she'll write that having nothing to eat because you're so poor is an excellent diet that leads to superior health.
Am I "conservative" now?

>>4805537
You probably should if you want to have an opinion.

>>4804860
She's somebody with moderate intelligence and good education who only writes about things that make her angry, so everything has all the nuance and detail steam-rolled over by passion, and a lot of her writing uses references, instead of careful definitions, to keep the energy needed in polemics. As a result she's relatively vague and shallow, though one suspects she's capable of a higher class of critique. The kind you need a few years of quiet reflection to write,

>>4804860
Proof that the good-looks popularity contest that begins at age 6 continues through university. Proof that ideas are claptrap cover for politics and retribution theories. Proof that today's left is as amnesiac as today's right in backward. She says fuck marriage, monogamy and mortgage. I say fuck personality cult scene girls masquerading as champions. Attention whore with a syllabus.

>>4805537
>dismissing someone solely on which side of the political spectrum they're on
You're not really contributing anything to this discussion.

Was this person on TV or something, can't imagine any other reason /lit/ would be talking about whoever this is so much

>>4805606
She's very outspoken here in the UK.

Let's talk about Shia LebEauffaowf and Metamodernism some more you guys

>>4805608
Let's talk about Stephen Fry, he wrote a book

>>4805617
Read the fucking thread if you want a detailed explanation of why people are talking about here. No need to be a facetious cunt.

>>4805618
I'm not reading this shitty thread

>>4805559
They're too deeply entrenched, just like the daily grind they're perceived as "good enough".

Hopefully once Captain Bucktooth is dancing on Lizzie's grave some eyes will open, and then the disapproval will come down the line.

>>4805623
>WHAT IS THIS THREAD ABOUT
>FInd out buy reading the thread
>HURR DURR THIS THREAD IS SHITTY EVEN THOUGH I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS THREAD IS ABOUT
You're being a little silly there buddy.

when you find out someone is a member of the tea party what do you think

>>4805350
Haha I tried Sciences Po (Sciences Pipeau as they call it) too. I didn't do too bad in written exams except in history because I didn't study too bad.
Two guys I knew who were richer spent one month in one of those private schools to study for that exams and they got worse grades than me.
Just going to the exam was painful with all those ultra-bourgeois looking people, even if I come from a bourgeois background.
I don't regret being STEM mustard-race instead.

>>4805631
I think that ghost Mary McCarthy and Not Bill Murray were the same person.

>>4805631
nothing good. but I think that about anyone who's a part of a political party.

>>4805627
>2014
>reading
Puh-lease.

>>4805644
This is an under-considered assertion.

>>4805350
>In France (my country), the equivalent of Oxbridge is Sciences Po.
lel no
ENS
Polytechnique
ENA
HEC

Granted ENA and HEC deserve to die in hell but the first two are accessible.

>>4805309
i love watching liberals getting their ass handed to them

PEOPLE ARE TYPING IN THIS THREAD, BUT THEY ARE NOT SAGING.

>>4805537
I'm reactionary as they come, that' s just being ignorant.

She's a cutie, that's about it.
I'd ram her snatch day in and day out if I had the chance.

>>4805718
>calling socialists liberals

You realise that murca's idea of left wing is considered right wing in Europe, right?

>>4805732
>complains about lack of saging
>doesn't sage himself

>>4806121
Who said I didn't sage?

>>4806227
you're post didn't say sage

>>4806244
>name is sage man
>post didn't say sage

>>4806115

obama more right than hitler?

come. on.

>>4806269
Everyone knows Obama is worse than Hitler.

>>4806115
Good riddance, I'd rather have fascism over a government that's even a bit left-leaning.

>>4804940

This. 3/10 would not read again.

>>4806269
Of course. Hitler's vision was a lot more socialist than Obama's will ever be.

>>4806256
sage goes in the email field silly

>>4806279
Fascism is pretty left leaning.

>>4804878
>>>4805257
>dribble
The word is drivel.
Dribbling is what you retards do uncontrollably in a pre-dinner scenario.

>>4806301
Only a libertarian would be stupid enough to beliebe this.

>>4805644
>>4805659
This thread has one interesting thought in it.

>>4804860
(Base the conversation off right and left spectrum of politics yet undermine there is different interpretations of it.)

Go back to /b/ and splurge your nonsense there, please.

>>4806311
Tell my why fascism isn't leftist apart from nationalism.

>>4806328
Because it upholds capitalism?

>>4806328
http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/fascism?q=fascism

>>4806346
The real problem here is people equating National Socialism with Fascism and assuming that either Nazi's were Fascist or that the terms are synonymous.

>>4806328
>ban trade unions
>kill trade unionists
>kill socialists
>kill communists
>support big business
>believe in and promote the idea of "natural inequality" in the form of racial superiority
>Leftist in any way shape or form


inb4 hurr durr but the authoritarian fascist state is socialism because I read "Liberal Fascism"
pic related it's laurie penny in sexy socks and heels

>>4806477
The only thing in which I could find Laurie Penny arousing would be a brazen bull.

>>4806524
what does that even mean?

>>4806530
It means exactly what I said.

>>4806530
To understand this, you must begin with the Greeks.

>>4806530
This nigga right here, he doesn't know what a brazen bull is.

>>4806530
Brazen bulls were metal sculptures they used to cook people alive.

>>4806542
>>4806547
>spoonfeeding

>tfw laurie penny performed as a burlesque dancer for a year and you will never see her perform

>tfw there are confirmed nudes of laurie penny out there but you will never see them

>>4806558
>imparting knowledge is wrong, no one should ever help each other, anything you learn must be learned on your own, from a book

>>4806559
why would anyone want to? she has the physique of a 12 year old Vietnamese boy

>>4806567
Yes, and I'm being serious.

>>4806568
>being this sexist, racist and ageist in one post

>>4806568
>other people find things attractive that I don't

Is this your first day on the internet/ as a human being on earth?

>>4806568
>my personal preferences are an objective truth

>>4806589
>>4806590
go to bed laura, it's way past your bedtime.

>tfw I will never worship Laurie Penny's salty ass

>>4805327

This, my dear friends, is the very definition of overly complex and highly pretentious ad hominem. Bravo Laurie.

will laurie make fedoras cool again?

or, for the people who are dissing her ITT, will she force you to throw yours away?

>>4806683
>fedoras
>not cool

>>4806683
Nice double standards and epic meme references, brah.

She's a feminist. Anyone who dislikes feminists is going to say she's full of shit, anyone who likes feminists is going to say she's spot on. I don't think it will ever go beyond that.

>>4806477
so they're more like post-1980 european social democrats am i right lmao

>>4806692
That's fucking retarded though. I'm all for feminism, but I think Laurie Penny is a fucking moron.

>>4806580
Daily reminder that some people unironically think like this.

>>4806692

>>4806688
>and epic meme references
Did you catch it? I thought it might have been a bit too cryptical.

>>4806700
What aspect of her journalism do you find moronic?

>>4806692
Can you explain your stance on her?

>>4806692
I like feminists but I think she can be a bit silly. I still like her, but you know.

>>4805424
>that quote

>>4805608
>britburgers thinking that they're relevant in any way
lmao

>>4806710
She's an opinionated journalist who is fun to read.

>>4806743
>american
>good

>>4805309
I'm sorry, I can't take someone seriously as a human being while he's waddling around with a glass of wine in his hand, babbling about people's duty to do things for free, his arms pressed to his sides, his limp wrist flapping in the wind like some pale flag. Then waving his finger at her (wine glass still hand) and slurring about his working class credentials against her education and femaleness. Then pouring himself another glass, emptying it, and pouring another one.
I mean, I know you're like British and all on that side of the water, and there's certain things you can't help, but, come on, man. Come on.

>>4806767
>he's not American
lmao
USA #1, end of story
filtered ;)

>>4806770
>against her femaleness.
I almost took you seriously.

>>4806780
>tfw amerifats will never ever get free healthcare

feels good man

>>4806788
>tfw americans get everything else

Actually does feel pretty good, man.

>>4806788
>mfw yurolards get "free" healthcare

>>4806824
Enjoy your kinder eggs m8

>>4806824
Like what

Having more fast food choices, guns and Mexicans doesn't count

>>4806788
>tfw they practice genital mutilation and don't get decent wages

>>4806832
>Britbongs regularly bring up chocolate candies when comparing nations

You're more American than most Americans.

>>4806843
I'll take Mexicans over muslims any day. Enjoy your sharia law.

>>4806785
He calls her a "public school girl."
There is no way to take that accept as a diminutive that attacks her gender and class as if they made her inferior to his manly, working-class roots.
Which might be believable, if he weren't such a fat, effete disaster of Britishness.

>>4806857
>accept
lmao
>diminutive that attacks her gender and class as if they made her inferior to his manly, working-class roots.
Blame society for giving the term schoolgirl that connotation and move on.
I fucking hate it when people say "X IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT", no shit, we fucking know except we just deal with it to function in our day to day lives.

>>4806848
>implying Islam won't rule the Earth
>implying the US doesn't have a Muslim, Kenyan president
>implying the Muslims haven't built a 13-story Mosque at ground zero to celebrate their victory over America
>implying America won't be the first country to completely dismantle it's legal system in favor of Sharia
>implying all right-wing paranoia isn't true

captcha: namely morecum

>>4806857
The only reason he said that is because she tried to paint a negative portrait of him as well-off second-home owner, where in fact all the wealth he owns he made himself out of nothing. Typical intentionally playing with the facts to imply something that simply isn't true.

>>4805348
This image deserved to be noticed more. It's very fitting.

She's a prime example of why women's sufferage was retarded. That pretty much killed western society.

>>4806884
>>4806868
He's a fat, effete intellectual slurping wine while he whines at someone about his working class credentials.
It's funny.
That's all I was trying to say.

>>4806939
>Success is bad xD

Stay mad commie scum. The world is beginning to grow tired of your shit, at least you had an okay run.

>>4806945
>Being born into money is bad xD

Stay mad commie scum. The world is beginning to grow tired of your shit, at least you had an okay run.

I thought that was James Blake

>>4806998
>Being born into money is bad xD
No but being born into money, accepting it, and then complaining about the "bourgeoisie" is fucking retarded.

>>4806683
Fedoras were designed to be women's clothing anyways.

>>4807031
What are you talking about and how is this even relevant to the thread? The dude wasn't born into money. It's funny because

>effete intellectual gets mad at another effete intellectual and tries to claim some kind of superiority
Please, the last thing /lit/ needs is another "marxist vs. everyone else" thread, don't turn it into that.

>>4807114
>What are you talking about and how is this even relevant to the thread?
>the thread is about a person who fits that description

Not worth a penny.

>>4805505
>Aren't Owen Jones and LP like bffs?
LP and China Mieville are super-bffs

>>4806297
>sage goes in the email field silly
You do know that moot changed the system?

People(redshit invaders) got so mad by the "downvote" or anti bumps they were getting with sage showing flipped their shit.

To stop all the drama moot made sage ninja by default...

That is why whenever I am saging in /lit/ I make sure to put some name with sage in it to let people know I'm saging... because placing sage in the name field is filtered.

>>4806477
>yfw that is a guy in stockings

>>4806304
>>dribble
>The word is drivel.
>Dribbling is what you retards do uncontrollably in a pre-dinner scenario.

I don't get it. I have seen Americans writing 'dribble' a lot recently. I think it's like 'I could give a fuck'; they're wrong, but they carry on anyway.

>>4807179
>I could care less

>>4807183
All equally stupid.
>I could care less
>I could give a damn
>I could give two fucks

>>4807179
>dribble

is this actually an americanism though? or just stupidity?

>>4807179
>>4807265
>not knowing what dribbling is
do u nerds not watch sports

>>4807287
>sports

and no because I'm not a normalfag

>>4807301
>not being a normie
fuk off u neckbearded aspie

>>4807287
Watching the Yank game, now. I hate when they pull this huge lead bullshit, it makes for a boring game, even when I find myself rooting for them.

It almost felt like Tanaka let them hit two back-to-back homeruns just to mock the Bostonian bastards.

>>4807307
>claims to be a normie

remember where you are boy

>>4807318
>muh secret club
yea im on onme of the most popular forums on the internet whos userbase is comprised of people who go to other sites

>>4807332
back2facebook

Laurie Penny on 50 Shades:

"But it's badly written!", I hear you cry. Um, hello? It's PORN. Whilst there is some pornography out there written with a deft stylistic hand – from Anais Nin and Henry Miller to Anne Rice's luscious, filthy Sleeping Beauty series – that's hardly the point, even if you don't buy Oglaf author Trudy Cooper's adage that "erotica just means porn that works for me." A dildo painted with an intricate lubricant-insoluble motif may look delightful, but a plain old rubber shocker gets the job done just as well. This book is porn. It is for wanking to. Pornography made for men is rarely judged on its artistic merits – the average 20-minute RedTube clip has hundreds of thousands of views and practically nobody leaves comments complaining that the lighting is garish, that the pounding cheese music is weird and unsettling"

>>4807332
>lit
>most popular

>>4804860

id fuck her

thats what makes a woman writer good right?

>>4807345
>/b/

>>4807337
how can i go back when im already on it
we have tabs u kno
>>4807344
but its still part of 4chan tho
plus lits filled with qt tumblr grils B)

>>4807345
"grab the straps."

Grab the straps. I hated hearing that. It meant a long session, a session including strap-ons, canes, paddles, unable to move for hours. When Laurie settles into a session she really goes for it. My pants hit the floor around my ankles, my hands reached for the straps, my lovely mistress, hair recently returned to natural color, made the straps tight so I couldn't pull away. I was meat hung from a butchers hook.

I looked into Laurie's eyes and she looked back, sparks flew. Her lithe body, barely five foot two inches was taught from many years practicing feminism and yoga. She has small shoulders, firm breasts that match her stature, 34A. She tapers to tiny waist that flares into hips that hide a wonderfully tight butt, round and well pronounced. She has strong legs that are perfectly toned.

She circled around me a couple times, inspecting. She grabbed my under shorts and pulled them down to meet my pants at me ankles. She circled again, took my cock in her hand and jerked it a few times. I couldn't but begin to rise to her although I knew it would mean more punishment for getting hard in her hand.

Now, seeing her standing to my side, I saw her arm extended knowing the first lash was seconds away. It landed squarely across my ass and I sucked in a breath hard and fast. She was giving me a series of strap blows that I couldn't count. They were landing so fast that the sting of one didn't register before the next blow landed...

>>4807353
...When Laurie stopped, she turned on the remote camera, the monitor was in front of me. My ass was flaming red and already bleeding in places. Now, monitor on, I could see the punishment being delivered. Her arm extended again as another series of fast hard blows rang out against my ass and upper legs. I continued watching each strike, almost hypnotized by the view of leather strap striking skin, skin ripping as it takes each strike.

She was still thrashing me aggressively, I could see the color of my ass turning a deep purple. Eventually the strapping would have to end and she would cool me with some ointment leaving me to anticipate the next round. When the moment came that she stopped strapping, the cool ointment being applied hurt, cool against the hot damaged skin.

She applied the ointment with one dainty hand, that was normal; however, she used her other hand to reach between my legs to fondle my balls, that was not normal. After she was satisfied that my ass was properly anointed, she came around my front and looked into my eyes; I looked back. Not sure what she saw in my privileged eyes, I saw something different in hers, not just the usual feminist look, there was something else, sensual.

She grasped my cock again and stroked it, then dropped to her knees.

"Don't you dare cum. If you cum, I will thrash your ass to the bone."

She sucked my cock into her mouth, licking and tasting along my length. Every few seconds she reminded me not to cum. "Not on my mouth, not on my face, not on my clothes, no cum." Then she would take me deep in her mouth and suck more.

As she sucked, I couldn't help but sway my hips into her...

>>4807359
..."Are you going to cum?"

How do stop a fired bullet exiting a gun barrel? I exploded into Laurie's mouth.

"I told you not to cum," she screamed. Slapping my cock with her hand, she stood, walked behind me.

She checked the camera and monitor, picked her favorite paddle, and displayed it to the camera lens. There was nothing for me to say, I did cum and she told me not to, she was going to make me suffer. In the monitor I saw her taking a firm two hand grip, pull her arms back, and swing. The paddle landed squarely and firmly leaving a new large welt. She wasn't swinging as often with the paddle as with the strap. Each swing of the paddle came after she adjusted her grip. Two, three, four, ten, thirty, I lost count, the monitor showed nothing but a large purple welt that was my entire ass. The pain began subsiding as my nerves muted, I wondered how much more I could take.

The blows were fierce, my ass vibrated against each blow. Two more, three, five more, I was straining against the straps trying to stay on my feet. I took ten more blows before calling out, "Marx!"

Hearing Marx, the blows stopped being delivered. "Are you okay? I can't believe how much abuse you took." I was released from the straps and all but collapsed to the floor and crawled away to my recovery area. My breathing was still labored and feeling was returning to my ass. The pain was putting me on the verge of blackout when I felt ice packs spread across my abused ass cheeks. The sudden cold against my recovering nerves was more than my senses could take; I did go unconscious.

I don't know how long I was out, however, Laurie was still with me, soothing and comforting me. When she was in her feminist role, she was 100 percent feminist. But when she hears our duress word, she quickly comes out of role.

"Its going to be a couple months before you're healthy again, there is a lot of damage. We better be careful for a long while."

>>4806692
I like feminists but that doesn't mean I'm not going to call her out for being a bourgeois turd.

>>4807378
I really hope that isn't "Only working class people in a council houses in Bristol can discuss classless social models."

>>4805478
lol

>>4807526
Sorry, but rich bourgeois cunts have no right to self-insert themselves as the mouthpeice of the working class and champion the dissolution of classes. There is no way a smug jewish princess with very affluent parents and a ticket to oxford can empathize with someone raised with welfare parents, seventeen siblings in one bedroom, spam twice a day on a council estate in Manchester.

>>4805579

Let me just say this.

If I see, this person eats shit next to their name. I'm going to assume they eat shit.
If I see left wing or feminism, I'm going to assume they're an idealistic idiot with a theoretical answer to everything. (Don't care that this is a strawman argument, If this doesn't set alarm bells off in your head, you're part of the problem)

When I see left wing or feminists in publications, I recognise they are the witterings of what can only be defined as, a well-educated idiot. I know this from experience, from the fact I've never seen someone as left wing / feminist who wasn't insane, idiotic and shilling for something they knew nothing about.

Idealism fags can get fucked. You're all retards.

Laters /lit/, you pretentious fucks. Call me when you do a single thing for the benefit of humanity.

>>4808691
lel

>>4808685
>spam twice a day on a council estate in Manchester.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anwy2MPT5RE

>>4807526
The most out of touch with low social status and poverty mention class consciousness the most often.

Like the closet faggot that responds to "How about the weather?" with "Taking dicks up the ass is disgusting", its about alleviating her own guilt rather. Its narcissism.

This explains 90% of the interest with Marxism in college courses around the world. And here on /lit/

>>4808731
>how dare people feel empathy!?

>>4808737
Guilt is not empathy.

>>4807353
>>4807359
>>4807364

>>4805550
Fucking this

For christ sake, I see it all the time and it's one of the main reasons to drive me away from traditional leftist circles, but honestly, do trustfnd babies really expect everyone to NOT WORK?

>>4808832
>really expect everyone to NOT WORK?

>>4807342
>tfw I have those complaints which is why I exclusively watch Metart and Lesbea

Laurie Penny confirmed for shit taste in porn

>>4808846
x-art, femjoy and twistys do some good videos.

>>4808785
I dunno. It got me hard.

>>4808838
>The true business of people should be to go back to school and think about whatever it it was they were thinking about before someone came along and told them they had to earn a living

Why not go back home and think about whatever it was they were thinking about before someone came along and told them they had to earn an education?

Why not do whatever it was they were doing before someone came along and told them they had to think?

Why not just get drunk all day erryday?

I'm open to alternatives to the usual earning a living schtick, but thinking we should just have no one work and do whatever they want is ridiculous. That leads to a degenerate society.

At the very least, if people are to not work and go off to do their own thing, allow them their patch of wilderness and a log cabin. Go be isolated and keep your own problems to yourself, being a part of society requires some sacrifice to contribute as well as take.

Though that sacrifice is certainly debatable.

>>4810774
>degenerate
go to bed /pol/

>>4810787
Naw, I've got work to do.

>>4810774
The guy is a physicist, and like a lot of educated people has a passion for it and probably assumes that people will need to learn some things in order to do what they're passionate about. Take 'school' to mean trade schools and art schools and things like physical training etc as well of university.

>>4810798
well, o-okay then

looks like a gay twink

>>4804860

I don't know anything about her other than she's some sort of feminist/privilege checker person

she's kind of hot though, would have kinky bondage sex with her

another unrealizable fantasy, sigh.

>>4810946
See:
>>4807353
>>4807359
>>4807364

I like how the Guardian readership always calls her out on her bullshit when she implicitly boasts about going to Oxford in her articles. Incidentally, most Guardian contributors have done this, at one point or another. She's very poor at journalistic research, as well.

>>4811703
Also, as other people in the thread have said, I also have chip on my shoulder about being an Oxbridge reject along with the other 3 rejections I had, despite my A*A*A

Sigh.

>>4811710
It seems to me that half of English /lit/ users, myself included, are Oxbridge rejects.

Fucking sad times. Lets start our own University.

>>4811758
I imagine most of us are in the RG/ 94 group. I know league tables are a huge circlejerk, anyway, with little bearing on reality, but it hurts to be told that you attend the worst uni in the RG.

>>4811697
Laurie Penny is appointed Grand High Justicar of the UK by the Womyn's Rights Tribunal of Trans-Europe. She has total and absolute authority over all patriarkin (formerly 'men'), as their chaotic, unpredictable, and downright evil behaviour has been deemed deserving of extreme security measures. On the merest suggestion that you even know what the word 'rape' means, she can have you incinerated by an ion cannon in low orbit (specifically designed not to resemble a phallus, to even the slightest degree).

One day she catches you, hard at menial labour as is fit for dim-witted patriarkin, fondling a distinctly phallic piece of fruit you just retrieved from your lunchbox. For fear that you are attempting to spark a revolution against your female overseers by reminding your fellows that they have dicks, she has you sequestered in a small office for questioning. She enters, locks the door, and seats her glorious thick post-feminist ass on the wooden desk before you. After unbuttoning her jacket and reclining on her palms to get comfortable, she spreads her meaty, nyloned thighs in front of you, and places the heel of her knee-high boot on your seated leg. She tells you that you are to be summarily executed for your crimes - ripped to pieces by roid-raging trannies. That is, she says, unless you service her, over and over, for hours on end, until she feels you have paid your dues to society.

What do?

>>4811769
Yeah, I'm Russell Group. Not even a good Russell group.

Don't know her work much but every debate or speech I've seen her do is fucking stupid

Starkey stomped on her hard.

>>4811769
>>4811791
>rejected from cambridge

w-warwick's a good uni though, right guys?

>>4804860
I think this is one of the worst pictures of a person ever. She is a professional whiner with roughly zero actual problems, and she had the nerve to decry someone who saved her life just because he was male and she wanted publicity.

She's supposed to be an advocate for women and yet here she is in a leather jacket and faux-hawk, taking an "edgy" (and boy, I hate the word edgy) professional photo. She looks like she's in a boy band, or a boxer, or in some movie about a smart ass who gets in too many fights.

God damn she is a ridiculous, loud twat. Fuck Laurie Penny.

>>4813499

excellent for english, apparantly, yeah

>>4813552
that's great but I do math[\spoiler]

>>4806700
>I'm not racist but...

>>4813550
>and she had the nerve to decry someone who saved her life just because he was male and she wanted publicity.

Huh? This is what she said:

"It is rather irritating that I have finally become tabloid-famous in the guise of a simpering damsel in distress. But my mobile phone and email went mad, and I woke up to stories about Gosling the "lifesaver" in The New York Observer, The Huffington Post and even The Washington Post. This is final proof that America has gone mad, lost all sense of perspective, and badly needs to be rescued from itself – possibly not by Ryan Gosling, decent and upstanding chap though he undoubtedly is. I was determined not to play at all, but among the reams of interview requests was one from the Ellen DeGeneres Show. I am very grateful to the dashing and meme-worthy Mr. Gosling, just as I am grateful to every other kind New Yorker who has saved me from oncoming traffic in recent weeks … making the streets of this fine city that much safer for random British writers who can’t remember to look both ways. It was a little bit like being in a cheesy film, but every day in New York is like being in a cheesy film. I’ve been here two months, and I’m still not sure this place really exists.”

i feel obligated to hate anyone who has had a picture like the op's taken of him(her)self

itt: 2012

Nothing. No one knows who she is. Stop posting this shit.

Fuck you.

>>4814019
>No one knows who she is
You mean YOU don't know who she is. Everyone else does, unfortunately.

>>4813979
Jesus she sounds like a real bitch.

Laurie wrote the first part of this at 16.

>>4804881
This. All other things aside, her writing is very okay.

>>4814051
And it shows.

>>4814036
I'd never heard of her

>>4814051
And Laurie wrote this at 26 after visiting /lit/. The impact /lit/ has on a writer is clearly visible.

>>4813979
I don't know why the media blew up about that and called her an ungrateful cunt.

>>4815361
Because she turned it into a statement on society like the reaching, shrieking twat that she is. Laurie Penny the DEVIL.

>>4815366
Hardly. All she was saying is that a) a story about Ryan Gosling putting his hand on her shoulder because she didn't look both ways doesn't deserve the enormous column space it got when there are important things the media could be covering, and b) that she didn't like the story exaggerated to her being portrayed as another weak female rescued by another brave male knight, but she was courteous and respectful about it.

>>4804982

>jewish descent
>independent school
>anorexia

Almost the full house of daddy issues, hysterical, dyke-y feminism

>>4815373
I SAY YOU SHE THE DEVIL

>>4815376
That's nice, now which book of hers didn't you like and why?

>>4815378
Any of them because she's an attention whore with legit mental problems.

>>4815380
You only need to name one book, and what particular mental ailment is she currently suffering from, Dr?

>>4815391
You can be a sarcastic cunt all you like, she's a professional whiner and just because she's a weak willed idiot who starves herself and gets offended over anything does not warrant attention. She is just a kike being a loud kike on talmudvision to promote her worthless degree in professional kikery. Kill yourself.

>>4815400
So what you are saying, if you are honest, is that you haven't actually read a single book of hers, but are shitposting because she has a vagina/ is a leftist/ is a feminist, and one or more of those ruffles your proverbial feathers regardless of what she may have written?

>>4815406
She's a cunt because she called /lit/ a "repulsive, misogynistic cesspool of teenage angst" in cybersexism after some Anon kept posting links to threads about her on her twitter.

>>4815406
I think I was pretty clear in saying that I'm not wasting my time reading trumped up whining promoted by a loud, inflammatory jew with a degree in being a jew. I'm very pleased to see you've accepted my invitation to be a snarky twat and look forward to seeing more or your impotent rage as the pendulum continues to swing the other way over the next decade or two.

>>4815409
She said a lot more than that about 4chan. Most of which highly accurate when you consider people like:

>>4815413
>I'm not wasting my time reading
That really is a shame, monsieur. Perhaps a man of your intellectual calibre would do better on one of the anime boards, no?
>Jew with a degree in being a jew
A degree in English from the University of Oxford is 'Jew'. I'm unfamiliar with that acronym.

Perhaps if you had read something by her you would be able to reinforce your puéril colère with something a little more substantial than 'jew,' and 'kike', no?

>>4805562
If you dont have enough money to buy socks then why are you on the internet?

>>4805562
>It is obscene to see a rich woman telling us
Laurie isn't rich. She lives in a tiny studio flat, self-sufficient, with the only money coming in from book sales and articles.

>while I don't have money to buy new socks.
That is pathetic. Sort your life out.

>>4805327

she's almost exactly what she's attacking, and oblivious to that fact.

What a spiteful harpy. Ad hominem out the ass, no argument advanced. She might as well not have written.

>>4815673
you're almost exactly what you're attacking, and oblivious to that fact.

What a spiteful harpy. Ad hominem out the ass, no argument advanced. You might as well not have posted.

>>4805309

they're both idiots

She's a great educator with a original entertaining style and other qualities.

>>4815688
Anally demolished femshits are hilarious. Please, be more predictable. By the way Laurie Penny triggers me because she makes me feel sad, you gonna get checked you fucking bigoted SHIT.

>>4815713
>Laurie Penny triggers me because she makes me feel sad
mfw

>>4815738
Yeah, I'm not surprised a feminist from tumblr would be too retarded to realize they are being mocked. By the way you're reminded me that retarded faggots like your exist which is also one of my triggers, please check yourself you racist bigot.

best thread on /lit/ right now

>>4815746

>>4810774
>allow them their patch of wilderness and a log cabin.
Oh god, this is my lifelong dream. Living from the earth only. I have done it before, I was living the dream. A log cabin in the middle of nowhere would be just even more perfect. Sadly, the government won't allow it.

Why does feminist journalism contain such vulgar cursing?
So pedestrian.

>>4815746

>2015
>being this ableist

kek

>>4817357
She wants to be Thompson.

>>4804860
She's okay as Roy's street friend on Arrow.

didn't know she was a writer.

>>4811703
I don't read The Guardian enough to verify this, but I hope it's true.

>>4817357
It's only really for online and "gonzo-style" pieces. An article in a broadsheet seldom does.

>>4818768
>Post-Marxist feminist writing gonzo journalism.
>Britain 2014