/lit/ - Literature

Revolutions is so cool.

Greek epics are real events, though. That's the difference between the two.

>>432702
>Revalations

>>432710
No, I'm talking about the last book of the bible.

>>432707

>>432696
>Open Bible
>Genealogy of Christ
>My expression

ive read nearly all of it, kjv too.

old testament >>> new.

>>432707

Wat. You mean to tell me that Greek gods are... Real?

PRAISED BE ZEUS!

Can we have an intelegent conversation whithout "STOOPID CHRISTUNZ I AM UN ATHEUST I UM< BETTER DAN YOO".

>>432746
Shut up christfag

>>432746

christfags gtfo

>>432746
Everything was fine until you came along.

>>432746
Nope. Now I hate Christ, too.

>>432729

JUPITER'S COCK

fixed.

>>432729
Seriously.
Who would you rather have as your god?
A whiny jew who leaves with his mother and has a foot fetish, or a giant man who lives on the tallest mountain in the world and chucks fucking thunderbolts at titans?

>>432696

I want to read it, but I'm not christian. I just feel like if people see me reading it in public, they'll make assumptions. But fuck 'em

>>432746
>>432746
>Can we have an "intelegent" conversation

apparently not, typical christfag here.
What good is an education when you're a magical snowflake of god, right?

>>432766
A guy who can part seas and kick Egypt's ass. Not to mention his badass nemesis.

>>432766
learn your trinity, dude

I read it. I like it.

>>432773
Greek mythology is lacking in goo bad guys. Hades and Medeusa asside.

>>432773
that was moses
he was jewish

>>432773

you know, the concept of the devil doesn't exist in the bible the way it exists in culture's understanding. not at all, satan isn't even remotely the same as the devil either.

>>432777
Oh right your multiple gods that are actually only one god.
Also you have demigods (saints) and a Pharaoh like god on earth (the pope), and you pray to them and offer sacraments to them
But honestly you only believe in one god right?

>>432780
in greek mythology most gods played both good and bad roles, for example there is some evidence Zeus was also the patron god of rape

>christian versian of Greek epics

>>432797
Not demigods. The pope is God's "represenative".

>>432788
Correct, Lucifer is a minor character.
Satan is an invention of the catholic church, meant to vilify the peace-loving Gaulish nature god Cernunnos

>>432803
An important God in any pantheon, whom I pray to every single day.

>>432780
>hades
>bad guy
Don't let Disney mess with your brain. Chronos, the Gorgons, and similar are considered true evil, while the other gods are neutral.

>>432809
lol keep telling yourself that.
And good luck with blocking out those molestation memories

>>432812
I think this thread should be about our rituals in praise of the Rape God.

>>432780
Stop getting your greek mythology from recently released hollywood trash

I read Genesis and Revelation, skimmed through the whole middle.

>>432831
Think about it this way. Who'd win in a fight.

Omnipotent God. Or Thunderbolt God.

Are we still not talking about the Rape God? Fine. I'll start.

Every first Tuesday of the month, in the morning, I kidnap a virtue and remove her hymen with a knife. Then, I eat it. Afterwards, I pray for about 30 minutes for a successful feast.

>>432846
Think about it this way. Whose side would you rather be on?

Your God. Or the Rape God.

>>432846
Oh wow

I gre up christian, decided I was atheist, but I still read the bible from time to time- the stories aren't bad. Op is right- just look at it like it's mythology. Also currently reading Paradise Lost because the words are lovely.

>>432846
The 10-year old school yard boys argument.
"Who would win Superman or spiderman?"
Yes christians are actually the mental equivalent of elementary school children, and base all of their moral decisions on comic-book logic

the jew myth is a pretty good read if you want to understand israel's national anxieties.

>>432907
Superman. Duhhh.

this is purely observational not christian bashing but the people who came up with the christian god were like the kid on the playground saying nope i cant die cause im invincible and i kil you cause i have all the powers, giving there god very little character, while the greek gods and other "pagan" gods are given flaws and make mistakes and have character, also they dont punish their followers for things they themselves caused, ie god punishes humans cause he gave them free will and we use it, Zeus punishes Prometheus for giving men fire not men them selves

I still haven't gotten all the way through the bible. Don't buy this author's books.

>>432907

How is that even a question? Superman could just go out into space and shoot Spidey with his laser eyes. No need to worry about Spider-sense or any bullshit.

>>432931
Medeusa was also turned into a gorgon after being raped by poseidon.

>>432891
This, skipping the parts where x begat y who begat z, of course.

>>432931
That was almost too painful to read.

>>432931
Everything you just said is wrong. Even your spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Congrats, you're an idiot.

>>432976
>>432966
butthurt christfags

>>432931
You hit the nail on the head

>>432976
not an idiot just thinking faster then i type, making my thoughts a little jumbled, given time to properly collect my thoughts it would make more sense i apologize for offending your sense of grammar punctuation and sentence structure as well as anything else i may have offended you with

>>432976
>>432976
>Even your spelling, grammar, and punctuation

Autistic Chrstfags.
Grammar, that's the only thing you really control in your life isn't it?
Enjoy whacking off to your English Grammar books

also besides missing an l in kill and saying dont instead of don't my spelling was fine

>>433017
You're supposed to "properly collect your thoughts" before you start typing. Especially here, fool.

>>433035
>fap fap fap fap

>>432931
A good christian would know when to shut up.

>>433035
how come? we aren't having a conversation that matters in any real world aspect, it causes more conversation and allows for others to correct or clarify any thing i may have wrong, much like most people i enjoy being corrected and what not if i am wrong at the person doing the correcting isn't calling me a fag and being pretentious

>>433060
obviously im not christian

I read the bible over one summer, and i felt that it was pretty good if you didn't take it seriously.

>>432931
replace "the kid" with a nation and you have the right idea. the old testament was basically the hope and fantasy of a nation in exile

>>433068
>and the person

Spoiler alert Jesus dies

Will you butthurt christfags and nuttless Athiests shut the fuck up and talk about the Bible without imposing stupid opinions?

>>433105
Keep reading. He comes back.

>>433151
You fucking dickhead I havn't got to that part yet

If you want some help studying the Bible further:
http://oyc.yale.edu/religious-studies

>>433112
>actually deluded to the point where he believes that "Atheists" are the only people who don't believe in the bible

I definitely think the Bible is a fruitful read, even aside from simply understanding its historical significance (and some of the perspectives it presents). The poetry and allegory throughout it coupled with insight into morals and such is pretty... interesting (for lack of a better word).

>>433233
Archaic.

>Filling your lack of a better word.

>>433242
I meant the experience of actually reading it, not what the Bible is actually like.

IMO, if you want to consider yourself well-read in the Western tradition of, well, anything, you *have* to read the Bible. And Plato.

>>432788

how do you mean? I haven't read it much since sunday school.

>>433252
It's been obscured by so much secondary interpretation I don't think that's true. I could be all like: "synchronic > diachronic", but I'm not quite going that far. I just think the bible's relevance has shrunk considerably and it's not essential reading anymore.

Honestly, the bible is pretty fucking boring. If you read long boring books such as Moby Dick(cry about it, faggots) just because it is a classic and just something it is SUPPOSED TO BE READ and because it has influenced TONS of Western literature then you should definitely read the bible. If you're an Atheist and jerk off to arguing with Christians then you should definitely read the bible, because the vast majority of the time you will be far more knowledgeable on Christianity than they could ever hope to be.

>>432696
>I think of it as a christian versian of Greek epics.

>>433264

I haz question????

>>433292
you obviously haven't read a word in it, it's got some pretty badass parts. Also you're an asshole

>>433327
I've read the Bible (not Moby Dick though) and have to agree with >>433292. Most of it's really boring. Revelations was cool though.

>>433355
>Revelations was cool though.
>I am 14 years old.

>>433314
Man I hope you're trolling

You don't actually believe in ghosts and magic and monsters do you?

>>433292
>long boring books such as Moby Dic

confirmed as troll, opinion irrelevant

>>433264

There is extremely little mention of supernatural evil in the Old and New Testaments. Like the majority of Jewish, Christian, and Muslim beliefs, notions of the Devil are almost entirely extra-Biblical. From a single line in the Bible, an entire doctrine can emerge.

Take Enoch for example. He gets like a 5 word mention, but because it is so different than the context in which it was written, his one mention becomes a topic of fascination and, eventually, the Book of Enoch and most Angelic lore springs from it.

>>433363
Ghosts, magic and monsters are just atheist versians of god,

>>433377
Dawkins thinks you suck.

>>433377
>>433377
>Ghosts, magic and monsters are just atheist versians of god

>thinks atheists believe in magic

ae you trolling?
Or are you just sooo fucking out there that you have no inkling of how stupid you sound?

I've read it, the old testament is blech but the new testament is insightful and edifying...also the gnostic gospels are worth a look

>>433386
There are atheists who believe in magic.

>>433268 It's been obscured by so much secondary interpretation I don't think that's true.

You raise damn good points. I would still recommend reading from the source material so that you can know secondary interpretation when you see it.

*Especially* if you even think you want to be a Protestant. If I meet one more person who believes in the doctrine of Sola scriptura but who has never read the Bible, I think my skin will turn inside out.

>>433377
This was me.
I am a wicked troll.
I win some flan.

Yeah...
Auto-flan for awesome troll man.

>>433401
Most atheists don't, and to make a generalisation like that is stupid anyway.

>>433405
So you want to be a protestant, eh?
Just a guess, but you must be a catholic.

Yeah, Christians who have never read the bible are bad. But not as bad as Christians who read it but didn't understand it but are still christians anyway. :/

>>433409
Hey I'm OP.

I beat you

>>433432
D'OH!
Don't take my troll flan.

I have indeed read the bible its great. One of my personal favorites but I specifically got a study bible because just the normal bible bores me I needed more information of stuff

>>433445
sorry bud. you're stuck with Trollfu

>>433462
>I was beaten by my father and molested by a priest as a child
>I am incapable of forming my own opinions

ftfy

>>433465
:(
yuk

>>433468
>Im an Insecure asshole
>I belive I die and nothing happens

>>433487
>I respond to stupidity with stupidity and lose all credit.

I'm reading the new testament atm... on my phone

Never read the entire thing before (agnostic)

Guess I'll read the old testament after

I have.

This is one of the most creative mythology books I could read.

Seriously, the guy who wrote had such an imagination. I am like "DAAAAMN!"

Gonna be a bit serious here.
I enjoy the book of Job. It's....poetic. A man endures terrible suffering and asks God why, and God appears! to say FUCK YOU. I think I should also read the song of Solomon. I heard that's pretty good.

I've been forced to read it 5 times, from start to finish.
It was kind of funny the first 3 times, but then it got old.

I've read it. Some of Jesus' parables are great guides for life. I love the lilies in the field.