/lit/ - Literature

>>3703311
I was schizophrenic for awhile in my mid twenties, but then Tom Cruise cured me.

>>3703330

were you really schizophrenic?
tell me about the experience

I had a schizophrenic girlfriend. She jumped off of a building because she thought Shiva was telling her to do so. I haven't been in a relationship since - it was traumatic, to say the least.
I'm boring. All I have is self-loathing.

>>3703352
Continued. This is hard to write about.
When I was studying to be a cartoonist, my self-loathing influenced it a lot. I made some horrifying shit. Then I decided not to be a cartoonist. It's funny that they say that creativity is a vent - I've been better since them.

>>3703359

so you had a schizophrenic gf, and you yourself suffered from some serious self loathing?

What was it exactly? It wasn't just low self esteem?

>>3703364
I won't go into detail - I have neither the time nor the will - but I've had a sort of self-loathing all my life. At ten, I hit myself so hard that I gave myself a concussion. Self-harm was not even the largest issue - I lost weeks of sleep thinking about my mistakes as early as six. I've been better of late, but some of the comics I made as a child were downright scary.

18/m/Portlandfag here. I have spd and bi-polar 2

>How do you find it has affected your creativity?
well I have trouble writing characters because I can't put myself into emotions they would have. But I do think to myself a lot and I occasionally come up with weird scenarios

>>3703377

care to share any weird things you come up with?

REI seems schizotypal. I don't know.

>>3703379

what is meaning of REI? Sorry I am russia

>>3703352
>Implying Schizophrenia exists
do u even Szasz

>>3703383

you may be russia, but i'm a giant orson welles

>>3703383

REI is a fellow poster, his trip is a japanese character and posts in ALL CAPS

depressed, bpd, npd, ocpd, borderline pd, social anxiety/retardation, possibly autism/spergs

I'd say it affects my writing subtly. I'm an idea person, and I think BPD probly helps with that. Plus, my capacity for extreme variation of mood allows me to get into different character's mindset easier. It also give me the ability to create stories with vastly different tones, instead of variations on a them.

Plus, if I suicide right when I'm about to get famous, I'll become super-lauded and everyone will assume I couldve come up with even better stuff if only I hadn't died so tragically, not knowing I was already used up at that point

I'm an actor, I write poems sometimes. I hear music in flowing water and am convinced that I have been convinced that I have some level of telepathy. Once in awhile I have other auditory hallucinations, like people whispering things to me as they pass, or my name being screamed in crowds.

It has done nothing for my creativity and doesn't really affect my social life too much, I keep it to myself.

I see my dead ex-girlfriend hanging around my room sometimes, she never talks to me or anything but she's just there. I also hear crickets randomly throughout the day indoors when there's nothing there.

It's just my brain playing tricks on me, I know both are hallucinations

>>3703413
>It has done nothing for my creativity and doesn't really affect my social life too much

That's because you don't have a mental/cognitive disorder...

Seriously stop this schizophrenia is a load of bullshit, you're not special kids

>>3703393
I don't think he's got anything wrong with him, beyond intense autism. I think he'd like to imagine he was insane, because it would suit the edgy image he's attempted to create for himself. But I think he's just very autistic.

People.
Stop.
Please.
It's not a disorder if you're able to function. That is what disorder means. Shit.
If it makes you more creative, and you get money from your creativity, then you don't have a disorder. If you get sad about how shit your life is because you put no effort into making it better you don't have a disorder. You're a lazy cunt. Minor personality differences or neuroses make you eccentric, or quirky, or weird, or fucking annoying as shit. They do not mean you have a disorder.
Look at me: I'm more asocial than most autists, I'm plagued with depressive and suicidal thoughts, and I'm more attention deficit than a meth-head.
Despite this, I am able to do things.
I have two degrees.
I have stable employment.
I have a fiance.
I am more psychologically fucked than most of you, but I do not have a disorder.
And neither do any of you.
Psychological problems don't make you special snowflakes, and nobody cares about your self-diagnoses.
Eat a bag of dicks.

>>3703511
Oh look at me i'm all fucked up yet I still manage to do fine in life, look at how special and capable I am.

Just stop it man.

>>3703511
>>3703511
>I am more psychologically fucked than most of you
Is your disorder that you have a huge fucking ego? And that you think psychological issues are something to boast about?
>Psychological problems don't make you special snowflakes
Of course they don't, yet why are you acting like they do?

>>3703520
>>3703523

>why is he saying that? Doesn't he know wikipedia says I have schizophrenia?

>>3703524
No, I don't actually have a mental disorder. I have self esteem issues, and I'm slightly emotionally underdeveloped, but that's it.

Your post just seems to be one gigantic "look at me, look how special I am. Everyone but me is boring and normal, but not me! I am unique!" and then you finish it off with
>psychological problems don't make you special snowflakes
Which just makes your entire post basically the dumbest thing I've ever read in my life.

>>3703528

I can see why you have self-esteem issues. You're dumb as shit. And probably ugly as fuck too.
I didn't claim I was special. Millions of people have a university education, a job and a partner. I'm generic as fuck. I don't stand out at all. That was the point of my post.
Don't focus on your problems and you can actually get shit done and be normal.
You might even land a job at maccas one day if you try really hard.

I have PTSD.

If anything it has given me stuff to write about.

>>3703539
Maybe you do have a psychological disorder.

>>3703539
top lel

>Everyone who isn't me is stupid

>>3703553

>everyone who let's minor personality problems get in the way of living their life is stupid

>>3703551

How can I?
Disorder means I have problems in the social or occupational parts of my life. I'm doing adequately in both of those.
Maybe you have a reading comprehension disorder.

>>3703561
The fact that you assumed I didn't have an education, nor was I capable of getting a good job or a girlfriend, like you, pretty much indicates that I'm right. You think you're a special snowflake, and that's fine. Lots of people do.

>>3703565

I was being facetious to make you feel bad.
Do you feel bad?

>>3703571
Not at all, but I appreciate that you care enough to try.

>>3703539
laughs