/lit/ - Literature

The worst people in every English class are creative writing students.

Probable the guy who only reads classics.

>>3348893
But....I'm about to start my creative writing module. Does that mean I'm going to transform into a monster?

>>3348897
Or the guy who only reads contemporary works

Everything.

The people that praise entry-level stuff.

There's this one guy in most of my classes who has the biggest hard-on for Huxley. He seems to draw so much of his worldview from the writings of Huxley that we've (everyone else including the teachers) call him "Huxley Says" because that's how he begins roughly eight out of ten of his uninsightful, boring interjections in class. The other two times he says anything are when he announces that he's going to the bathroom or that he has to "take a call." One of the girls in our class who had went to the bathroom prior to him leaving to "take a call" found him browsing 4chan on his phone around the corner of the hallway, and apparently he seemed flustered and quickly put the phone up to his ear and said some form of goodbye and then pretended to hang up.

So, sup Huxley Says, I'm sure you're reading this.

the worst people in every english course are those other guys

>>3348887
The old chick that won't shut up. She talks incessantly about squirrels and cats and it never has anything to do with lecture. Clearly has no social graces or ability to tell when people don't care. Probably has Asperger's.

The other person I hate is this chick who writes poems with huge words that nobody uses anymore because she thinks that makes her poetry good. She's ultraedgy, uberfeminist, is constantly telling everyone she's pansexual and some fraction of a part native american, is vegan... just all of that shit that comes with utter punch-in-the-throat hipsterism. It doesn't help that she hangs all over the prof either.

Utter than these two people, I'm in love with the whole program, but I literally ALWAYS end up in a class with one or the other somehow.

(Thanks, OP, I needed to vent, I feel better.)

>>3348919
>Utter than
I must be high. Other than. Christ.

There's this one guy in most of my classes who has the biggest hard-on for Orwell. He seems to draw so much of his worldview from the writings of Orwell that we've (everyone else including the teachers) call him "Orwell Says" because that's how he begins roughly eight out of ten of his uninsightful, boring interjections in class. The other two times he says anything are when he announces that he's going to the bathroom or that he has to "check the screen." One of the girls in our class who had went to the bathroom prior to him leaving to "check the screen" found him browsing Reddit on his phone around the corner of the hallway, and apparently he seemed flustered and quickly put the phone up to his ear and said some form of goodbye and then pretended to hang up.

So, sup Orwell Says, I'm sure you're reading this.

>>3348887
First day
>teacher asks what is Poetry
My answer
>Poetry is a type of narrative in which the writer, or poet, conveys a thing or ideal with the highest eloquence of his or her vocabulary
>classroom claps
Guy behind me
>Poetry was used by the greeks to relate heroic deeds of ancient heros, there are variations of poetry, such as the Japanese Hiku and it continues to be used to relate different things.
>that guy......

Anyway i've thought of a murderlist for this class and this fagget is target number one

I know that I'm not the only person nervously searching these posts looking for a description of myself.

>>3348934
oh let me describe yesterday too.
>teacher asks what are our Favorite Novels or our Favorite authors
>few students say casual tier things, Poe, Dickens, Austen yawn
>gets to me
My answer
>Prometheus Bound
>teacher's mind is blown, casual tier class has no idea
Guy behind me
>Perks of being a wall-flower was rad!!!11!!!

>tempting suicide

>>3348946

you sound like an attention craving pleb

>>3348926
Does he also drink english beer, french reds, and spanish whites?

>>3348946
Sounds like you need some Deconstruction on that dichotomy.

>>3348955
Yeah.

Except, he doesn't call them that.

He calls English beer 'double good' or some shit. Utter cunt.

>>3348946
I bet if we had a class together I'd be posting about you in this thread.

>>3348961
I'm pretty certain he's being ironic by playing directly into the perception of /lit/.

>>3348919
>The old chick that won't shut up.
Yeah, I hate this shit too. It's not just my lit classes either, nearly every single class has some woman in the age range of 35-49 that acts as if everything coming out of their mouth has some sort of transcendent worth, though usually what they say relates in some way to something they saw on TV or some stupid shit their kid did.

There's also the case of the older man who has an intensely narrow worldview but wishes to apply it on every single situation as if it was butter, but that generally happens less in my experience.

>tfw no english class

Fat, ugly mature student. We call her 'single mother' because she somehow never stops bringing up the fact that she is a single mother/was a FEMALE prison guard in basically every seminar.

She was only in one of my seminars this semester. She was in 4-5 of them last year.

She also says 'Y'know', 'Hang on a minute' and 'At the end of the day' as often as I inhale or exhale. I despise the phrase 'At the end of the say'. 'Ultimately' expresses the same message in a concise and less brain-dead way. Bitch.

Her phone never stopped going off through all of my first year, either. Every time she got a text message some piano notes would blast out of her phone and proceed to a little song. She stopped it every time like she was really embarrassed, but it took her a whole fucking year to learn that there's a 'silent' option on every mobile phone in the modern world.

...bringing this back to /lit/, she also has terrible critiquing skills. Literally everything seems 3deep5her

Anwar

>>3348990
I have that exact same problem except with a stupid bitch who always says "the bottom line is"

Fuck you bitch you can't just say the bottom line like it makes your opinion completely right and everyone should listen to you fucking jesus you're lucky I don't make some clever joke about your weight out of that because I totally could

You all seem like characters straight out from the movie "Mean Girls", with the difference that you like and talk about literature.

>>3349014
I don't think Mean Girls invented assholes

>>3349014
Reasons why you're wrong:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/God_complex
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferiority_complex
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oedipus_complex

English really attracts some of the worst people.

The neckbeards, fedora wearers, people who actually want to take medieval lit.

>>3349022
Have you ever just stopped and thought about how much of a prick you are

Seriously, just look at what you just wrote and think about what you are

>>3349024
fuck you and your fedora shitmaster

>>3349030
You're just mad because you have a girly neck with no burly beard

Hairy bloke who insists on being called Jess or someshit, loudly talks through lectures and then doesn't do the reading. They'll probably fail off the course soon, everyone else is great

>>3349024
Are you implying that these people aren't terrible?

I respect sorority girls who take psychology because they are "Really interested in how the mind works" more than lame English majors.

>>3349014
Mean Girls is fantastic because most people, if they are honest, will see some of themselves in the characters

>>3348966
let's discuss this possibility further

>>3349044
Yes, and 4chan is basically a huge burn book.

>>3349045
It can be very difficult to distinguish between irony and sincerity on /lit/.

on speaking a little about our reasons for taking a modernism seminar this semester, a gay guy i knew from a previous class talked about his resentment toward the 'straight white male' author and wanting to read more about those that didn't necessarily fit that bill

ugh

>>3349042
what's wrong with medieval lit?

>>3348936
you're not, lol. I always take these threads as a big fat WHAT NOT TO BE sign.

>>3348946
faggot

The guy who only reads children's literature.

Especially if he criticizes the teacher's reading selection, or gets angry because the teacher wont let him write his final paper on a book written for fifth graders.

>>3349191
>Especially if he criticizes the teacher's reading selection, or gets angry because the teacher wont let him write his final paper on a book written for fifth graders.
what kind of awful school do you attend that this is an issue? i study at Ohio State and even our english majors aren't that stupid.

>>3349196
Lol, truth, I want an answer

The film student.

>>3349191
>a book written for fifth graders

Which book?


>>3349214
Why?
I'm a film student

>>3349214
i'm sorry our preferred medium is intrinsically superior to yours. no need for hard feelings, though.

>>3349221
>Which book?
Take your pick. Nearly all YA lit is written at a fifth grade reading level. Occasionally you'll find YA lit written at an eighth grade level, but it's rare and the difference is negligible.

>>3349214
the pornostar

>>3349196
Hold the phone... I'm headed for OSU... is there something I should know? You guys are among the top when it comes to your Masters program.

>>3348908
This guy.

>>3349377
I guess he was casting his own college in a negative light before someone else did. (this is 4chan).

I mostly just dislike when people have no idea why they're an English major, what they want to do in life, or any particular literary interests. I am tempted to shake them and tell them to get out while they still can, but I suppose it's their call.

>person interested in a class
>I say the professor is a cool dude
>asked if he's strict about attendance and lateness as Rate My Prof said, since that wouldn't work for her

>first day of Modernist Poetry class
>person says he thinks all poetry is good poetry
>drops the class after a couple weeks

>>3348990

Just imagining this woman speaking in an obnoxious American accent makes me cringe.

>>3348990
Yeah I know someone literally exactly like that. Think she should lose some weight and lrn2literature.
Then there's this faggot tall guy who's like 20 years old but acts like an angsty preteen who wants to slit his wrists and write his PhD in his own blood. A PhD which he NEVER shuts up about by the way. Did I mention he's a druid and BDSM conossieur? Yeah. Well that.

creative writing class is always pretty interesting, no one really bothered me but i remember some interesting characters.

a tall skinny dude who only wrote horror stories and noire. he used "tumultuous" like 5 or 6 times during a 3 page story once. he seemed pretty cool though, i reviewed a lot of his stuff and i will never forget his final paper about a jew hunting cyborg.

the film student, his paper was filled with stereotypes. asian characters talked like "im so ronery" and blacks were all "WHERE DA WHITE WIMMINZ AT?!" so, yeah, they were fun to review. he reminded me of tarantino.

a girl who wrote almost entirely about drugs and counter-culture stuff.

another girl who always tried to argue against me in group discussions because i told her that i thought one of her stories was dumb.

a foreign exchange student who wrote in broken english but the teacher always gave A's to.

>>3349449
>Did I mention he's a druid and BDSM conossieur?
Did he tattoo BDSM onto he forehead? Why the hell is he giving that information out in class?

I don't judge

>>3349477
The guy has no filter. He literally talks about domination in sex, druidism, shit metal or his PhD in every seminar

>>3349484
Jesus. If he's going to talk about deviant sex practices in class, he could at least spice things up more.

>Then there's this faggot tall guy who's like 20 years old but acts like an angsty preteen who wants to slit his wrists

Thought this was me until you mentioned the potential for a PHD.

>>3349471
>i will never forget his final paper about a jew hunting cyborg

I sincerely wish that I had had the opportunity to read that.

>>3348893
This is so true.All of the creative writing majors at my school are so poorly read.

I was in a introductory creative writing class with this one girl that was a creative writing major and only read John Green and J.D Salinger. She was in my group for a collaborative drama piece along with another guy that was also a creative writing major that writes unfunny comic fiction or something (They were filled with obscene language for no reason). You could tell he rarely ever read anything other than what his teachers give him.

The girl took the reigns of project and wrote a piece that combined a stereotypical murder mystery and The Breakfast Club. I was so fed up with the whole project that I ended up writing 5 of the 10 page drama, adding in a ghost cat named Beckett that spouted nonsense about the absence of meaning. She wrote like a 16 year old. I was surprised to find that she was like 22 due to her juvenile taste in literature and music.

The last time I seen her her face was caked in make up and her eyeliner was crooked to point of being laughable.

>>3349581

>a ghost cat named beckett that spouted nonsense about the absence of meaning

>>3348906
I think we just found the Classics Only guy

>>3349581
sounds hot

Everyone is horrible in english programs as only horrible people major in English.

>>3348887
The one who speaks often and almost exclusively in platitudes. This usually comes with an inflated sense of self worth.

Also people who don't do the reading. Fuck those people.

>>3349471
>another girl who always tried to argue against me in group discussions because i told her that i thought one of her stories was dumb

These are the fucking worst. People who hold semester-long vendettas against you in seminars because you once, and quite politely, disagreed with one of their points.

>>3349471
>a girl who wrote almost entirely about drugs and counter-culture stuff.

I definitely would have tried to fuck her.

>>3349629
2deep4u

>>3349663
>The one who speaks often and almost exclusively in platitudes.
worse: those platitudes are from pop culture/action films

>>3349528
to be honest, i felt the same thing.

>>3349663
I hate hearing that I received a similar grade to the guy who didn't read any of the 10 books we were assigned because they were 'dry'.
He is from out of state, however, so the teachers tend to look over certain failings in light of securing finances.

>>3349214

I met one neat film student during my time at University. He went to a different University though. The film students were the fratbros of my campus; on par with the business students in their disregard for critical thought and their complete regard for partying down.

>>3349221

Because film students simply don't read. Most of the ones I met didn't even watch a diversity of films.

>>3349561
My thoughts exactly.

>>3348903
You already are one.

>>3348936
You are not. I dread seeing myself in here

>>3348919
>The old chick that won't shut up.
Oh Lord. My year has a few of those, one of them keeps nodding and making approving noises to anything the teachers say.

Jesus. I guess that I got pretty lucky with my class. Unfortunately, only about half the class read the selected reading, which did piss me off.

Worst guy in my English class sits in front of some pleb whose just trying to expand his mind by getting into literature. He shouts, in the nasally voice of a bagpipe, the most obnoxious attention-whorish things, trying to impress the teacher with his oh-so-learned dribblings about Prometheus Bound and books he's wikipidia'd specifically for the class. After this at least two people call him out on his shit, and after class we find him in the bathroom with his dick in a pencil sharpener he's modified as a masturbatory tool, then we beat the pomp out of him. He cries for his friends, but they're all internet fabrications.

>>3349440
Try a broad Yorkshire accent.

This one fat, pimply jew with long hair. He wore the same hat all the time, the same wrap around cape, and was heavily into sci-fi and fantasy...ALWAYS argued with the teacher. He hung around some neckbeards in the cafteria and played M:TG constantly.

>>3349669
That's pretty much the only reason she's there.

>>3349774
>Most of the ones I met didn't even watch a diversity of films.

What the fuck is up with this? I knew someone who was in film and he cited the The Usual Suspects as his reason for going in for it, and couldn't name very many movies besides this.

>>3349966
>He wore the same hat all the time, the same wrap around cape
Do people like this actually exist?

A more interesting question: How do English Majors deal with all the contempt by STEM majors?

>>3349377
OSU has some pretty solid departments in especially STEM fields but the english program is rather mediocre. what are you going for?

>>3350106

how does a car windshield deal with the contempt of a mosquito

>>3350106
>deal with all the contempt by STEM majors?

Every STEM major whose opinion I've ever cared about indulges in philosophy and literature, I've only ever met a few "SCIENCE IS THE ONLY THING THAT ISN'T ACADEMIA JERKING ITSELF" types and they were assholes.

not necessarily the worst people, but I cannot fucking stand it when people start sentences during discussion with "I think it's interesting that [almost invariably something incredibly insipid]"

>>>3350106

Knowing Chinese and Indians will take their jobs soon.

As has already been said, the only people are definitely the worst.

>platitudes
>mentioning politics in class, usually an attack on obama
>everything is 2deep4them
>consider themselves the smartest in the class due to 'life experience'
>sports references every class
>anecdotal evidence in every debate
>all required reading is 'dry' as someone mentioned

Fuck. I can't do it anymore. The next school shooting is imminent

>>3350147
I sometimes imagine how my teacher feels when someone casually says that to him in a conversation. I cringe when I hear it, and I've not been teaching punk kids for 30 years..,

>>3349849
>one of them keeps nodding and making approving noises to anything the teachers say.
Oh god, this. Not just with old women though, anyone who seems to grunt, nod, or make any sort of gesticulation of approval every time the teacher makes some definite point is the most awful shit.

>>3349030

Can you please explain what's wrong with fedoras?

>>3350196
These are the same people that share/like memes on facebook because "omg so true".

>>3350198
Everyone who wears on is a tactless, autist. To wear a fedora, you require a level of self-awareness so low, that you think a formal hat goes well with non-formal attire/haircut in a non-formal environment.

http://fedorasofokc.tumblr.com/

The guy who reads into everything WAY deeper than could have ever possibly been intended, to the point of ridiculousness.

The most recent example would be him claiming that, in The Stranger, the death of maman represented the deterioration of French-American relations after WW2.

Needless to say, the teacher never tells him that he's wrong -because this is an English class.

Professor gives a disclaimer for Lolita - saying that anyone that was abused doesn't have to read it, but that he's had others email him before saying how much it helped them.

My professor is an arrogant asshole.

One of the tutoring sessions turns into 'I was abused and though this about the book.'

>dat cynical feeling

There was one guy in a few of my 1st-year tutorials, last year. We were talking about Cousin Phillis; I was talking about the leitmotif of fecundity in relation to sexuality, and he suddenly spouts, after I'd just used the word: 'There's no such thing as pastoralism!'

I know it sounds stupid, but I was really mad.

>>3350198
If you are considering wearing a fedora, ask yourself this -

Am I wearing a matching suit? Y/N

If Y, you should probably ask yourself which con you plan to attend with your Humphrey Bogart cosplay.

If N, do not wear the fedora, as you will look stupid.
The problem with fedoras is that they have become, in our age, emblematic of deluded neckbeards who believe they look good; people so drastically non-self-aware that they don't even consider that their hat might not match the rest of their clothes. Which it doesn't, ever. I don't even pretend to have any knowledge of fashion, but wearing a fedora with what they normally wear, as well as their typical greasy long nerd hair, is a fucking wardrobe disaster.

>>3350209
>Everyone who wears on is a tactless, autist.

>>3350218
If he can support that by anything else in the text, and build up a continuous analysis of the book as that sort of allegory, that's cool, and he won't be wrong.

If he just said that, that it's just immediately allegorical, with nothing to corroborate it, then he just pulled it out of his ass.

>>3350218
Ours do. There's a point where interpretation becomes finite. You can't, for example, say that Emma Bovary loved her husband.

>>3350225
I think if you're just very attractive then you can get away with one too.

>>3350239
>>3350228
If you're very attractive, and also an endearing, loved, public figure, you can pull off anything.

>>3350239
The fedora itself doesn't look good, though. That'd be as decent a picture without it.

>>3350239

Or if you live on a ranch

>>3350239
Oh yeah, of course. People like Depp and Brad Pitt can get off with them because they are just generally really attractive. The issue is when deluded, spotty neckbeards decided to start wearing them, totally oblivious to how idiotic they look.

>>3349021
Oedipus? Really?

>>3348946
>Prometheus Bound
That is neither a novel nor an author, you dunce. The professor was probably floored by your inability to answer such a simple question.

>>3350246
We're speaking definitely and authoritatively in the way your father had in your childhood.

>>3349581
Wait? Is John Green considered a serious writer in english literature?

Who is John Galt?

>>3350263
Not at all. Huge shithead.

>>3350209

Okay, people behind that link look positively retarded. Dunno, maybe it's an american thing. Most people with fedoras I see pull it off just fine. You just have to realise, unlike those people, that a hat is worn outside, with a jacket.

>>3350106
As a phyics student I can say that most of us don't really think badly about you literature guys. Those /sci/ kind of people aren't that common.
>>3350173
...although I can see how literature grads won't have that problem.

I've enjoyed reading this thread - bump.

>>3350276
>implying the entirety of reddit doesn't exist

>>3349650
My exact thoughts, bro.
>>3349581
Did you Descartes that?

>>3350276
If anything STEM majors have to deal with more shit from STEM majors.
>implying anything is harder than Electrical Engineering and Maxwell's Equations
>implying that is harder than Fluid Mechanics
>implying that is more fundamental than Physics
>implying you know how to do lab work like a Chem/Bio major
And so on ad nauseum. I don't think many days went past where I didn't encounter this as an undergrad.

>>3351644
LOL what a pleb
it takes SO much more intelligence and *critical thinking ability* to write pages of semi-defensible analysis of James Joyce

Me. I spend every tutorial chatting with the tutor and talking over the people around me; taking over the class, really, and not giving anyone space to breathe. If I don't, though, they all just sit there in terrified silence. Motherfuckers. Second worst was the flamboyantly gay George Martin fan.

>tfw my philosophy tutor tells me I'm 'deep'
welp, looks like i'm not accomplishing anything in this life

>>3351648
Those things would be the STEM equivalents of critical lenses. And while I have yet to meet an undergrad who gets Deconstruction, nobody at all really understands Fluid Mechanics. I don't know if that makes it easier or harder though.

>>3349073
I don't see much that's wrong with that, other than that he's perfectly entitled to read up on other authors in his own time. I'm much more interested in characters whose lifestyles are like my own, and in the ideas relevant to such, than in those often detailed by your common 'straight white male' author.

>>3351644
I major in Molecular and Cellular Biology and Psychology, and Regularly take Euro and Russian lit courses for fun. The hardest classes for me are inorganic and physical chemistry. Everything else is just a matter of time management and interest.
Within Biology and Psychology, the closer you get to Neuroscience the more respectable you are, the closer you get to special ed. or ecology, the harder it is to find competent partners.

>>3349864
>He cries for his friends, but they're all internet fabrications.

Maid me laff, good on ya, m8.

I read this: >>3348926
before I read this: >>3348909
and I don't get what point you're trying to make.

>>3351683
>neuroscience
>respectable
Wouldn't expect much else from a bio-psych major.

>>3351683
>The hardest classes for me are inorganic and physical chemistry.
I did a Chem degree alongside my Engineering degree. It is rather different to organic chemistry, although I found organic chemistry to be harder for the sheer volume that had to be covered in it. A lot of stuff from inorganic also inevitably applied in some way to organic.

Those dirty hipsters that reek of cigarettes

I'm not an english major (yet) but this happened in my very entry level creative writing class and I still can't believe it happened.

>As homework, we're asked to create a character with some stupid worksheets as a rough guide.
>One girl has an obvious self-insert, a bunch of others have typical fantasy cliches, only me and another guy have something relatively normal. (As in human and not part of a genre.)
>Get to this one girl who supposedly writes a webcomic.
>She starts rambling on about how her character Gerard is a closet homosexual who sleeps with a lot of women to cover it up. He also randomly has an obsession with velvet hats.
>Mentions that his skin is pink and that he likes to die his hair blue.
>Wtf.
>Everyone else sort of starts glancing at each other.
>Gerard also has a tail, which he likes to wrap around people.
>Obviously a furry, but no one can really say anything.
>We finally move on to more fantasy cliches.

All the education majors that fill up upper division courses and always talk among themselves about the uselessness of the given subject of the class.

>>3351649

Socratic butt-buddy.

>>3349471
Why would you call a story dumb during workshop? Are you seriously that stupid?

>>3349581
You're spouting a lot of edgy nonsense, but in my experience writing majors do tend to be the least well read of the English kids. Course, there's always that guy who has read everything.

>>3351732
The GRRM fan? I made an effort but I think he's only a recent out as he didn't seem all that 'advanced' (he was, after all, someone who expected to impress others by reading fantasy).

>>3349705
Of course that's the reason. It couldn't possibly be the fact that despite doing the reading you're not much at writing or critical thinking. Let me guess, you're one of those guys that "doesn't receive b's."

>>3350072
I've talked to art professors about students that don't want to become knowledgeable because they see it as some kind of corruption of their pure ideas. Maybe this is the same deal.

>>3350106
I gesture in their direction whilst guffawing.

I took a first year english course alongside some other Biology I was finishing up and I was unfortunate enough to read some bad poetry written by a horribly overweight girl.

The poetry was exclusively about her sexual escapades.

>>3350209
>>3350225
Look. I'm not condoning wearing fedoras or any other type of hat, but fedoras aren't formal. Bear in mind that "formal" in clothing means either black or white tie.

Should I do a law degree to get a job, or English lit (which is what I want to do)?

>>3351623
>implying reddit isn't just trolls trolling trolls just like /sci/.

>>3351756

Orson Welles once said that in a BBC interview late in his life. Of course, if you're not going to watch a lot of films, might as well choose wisely, at least.

Then again, being a filmmaker myself I feel like I can be some kind of Godardian machine, at times; luckily, I spread out the basis of my ideas for projects. Sometimes it's good to go for awhile, even a long while without watching anything...I've always loved reading about film, however.

>>3351767
Don't worry about it as your peer group is largely unemployed anyhow regardless of what they majored in. The STEM's (And by STEM I really just mean Engineers and by Engineers I mean the ones who aren't in CS/EE because both of those fields are outsourced like hell) fair a bit better but honestly anon it's who you know and how good you are at selling yourself. No one really will give a shit what you major in because 99.9% of what you'll be doing at a job your employer can train you in. Hell even the majority of engineers I know (I work at a tech company) have had to be retrained the 'proper' way. Law is abysmal (In the States at least) and a horribly flooded market. Just think outside the box of what you want to do. At the very least you can always go into Technical Writing , which is what I do.

>>3351664
Though, to be fair, everyone that studied or taught at Yale after America latched onto deconstruction like a lamprey didn't understand it either.

And it doesn't help any when there's a huge contingent of internet trolls actively seeking to undermine all post modernisms. I fear greatly for anyone seeking to understand deconstruction and its offspring outside of the classroom.

>>3351683
Read anything by Homi Bhabha and get back to me. Fuck, read anything by Gayatri Spivak. This is not to say the shit your doing isn't incredibly hard, but let's not pretend only the STEM fields contain academic rigor.

>>3351767
>Law degree
>Job
Not in this decade champ.

>>3351773
Well, I guess it seems silly to me because I don't really buy into the idea of me having pure ideas. That and there are countless better writers out there. I figure by reading them I might learn a few things.

>>3349223
the only reason your above videogames on the "art" tier list is cause you're riding on theatre's coat tails.

>>3351792

Videogames are the greatest artform.

>>3351764
jesus meezus

Any moral relativist or anyone who thinks that works don't have inherent meaning and that the worth is decided by the reader. I honestly think those people should... well, stay in school I suppose.

Well, I have the required mature aged student in my class who answers every fucking question and tries to get the prof into conversations about, 'these kids, right? Hey? Hey? Us older folk, right? Us older folk.' and shit like that.

And now, I present to /lit/, Maleah Layne.
http://www.amazon.com/Maleah-Layne/e/B00588BNB4
She keeps bragging to everyone about how she has a [self] published novel before everyone else and how she cannot possibly disclose how much money she has made from them because of contractual obligations. Please also note the 5-star reviews from a few of her friends and multiple typos in the free samples. This is third year. Most people who write on her level dropped out six months in and left a tight-knit skeleton crew of Camusian hipsters and Hemingway worshippers, but she just keeps on trucking. The most infuriating part is she isn't depressed, like at all, and keeps rubbing our balls the wrong way.

The only creative writing segment of my entire course was the first six months by the way, and she keeps harping on about it.

>Peer review
>Quietly pulled aside and told that this is an environment for constructive criticism and we are trying to foster a positive atmosphere for every student

>creative writing night class
>mfw those evenings made me feel normal

Best writer in there was this black single mother, she was in her early thirties, very attractive, soft spoken and polite, and wrote mostly period pieces / low fantasy stuff, she had a knack for the descriptive.

And then we had the two white girls who wrote LMP porn, one of whom wisely decided to read one out loud for the benefit of the entire class.

There were a few weirdos, sure, mostly quiet folk, middle age and below. Had one older woman, was in her mid forties but didn't look like she'd finished her thirties. She wrote almost exclusively smut, which was fine, because at least she could write.

Was a surreal experience. All these people who want to be writers, and the quiet ones, the ones who didn't argue in the debates, if you could call them debates, were the few good writers in the class.

>>3351937
Wait...readers of Barthes, Foucault, Derrida, et al. and other reader response types are the worst people in your department? That seems...I don't know, unlikely.

Reading some of these anecdotes of workshop, I can't help but be thankful that every workshop I've participated in included the stipulation that the author of the manuscript in review had to remain fucking silent.

>>3351955
You should give her the dick.

>>3351965

He's one of those annoying people trying to be edgy by being conservative.

Those people are actually pretty solid contenders for "worst in the department".

>>3350106
My mathematics friend is just mad how little work I have to do with my studies.

>>3351728
>nofunallowed.jpeg

>>3351981
What people? Reader response fags and their antecedents or the gentleman I was responding to?

>>3351955
>When all the other kids were out at parties getting drunk and kissing each other, I was at home, writing it all down.
Jee-zus Mee-zus.

>>3351955
>http://www.amazon.com/Maleah-Layne/e/B00588BNB4
>"When all the other kids were out at parties getting drunk and kissing each other, I was at home, writing it all down."

This sounds pretty sucking sad

>>3352009

If you don't know what constitutes being conservative, you really shouldn't be having this conversation.

There's a mandatory course on oral expression in my studies. People put tumblr inside jokes in their PowerPoint presentations.

>>3352014
Reminded me of this.

>>3352025

>that pic

Wow. He isn't normal spaghetti, he's fucking certifiable. inb4 he's arrested in a few years and they find body parts in his freezer.

>>3351955

>"When all the other kids were out at parties getting drunk and kissing each other, I was at home, writing it all down."

my sides have breached event horizon

you keep on truckin lil sis

>>3352025

Not really related, as I major in math, but we have this dude who asks retarded questions in literally every lecture, and then debates with the obviously annoyed professors. But it all became wonderfully clear why this was going on when I discovered he wrote a book about his autism, and how to deal with it. It's even worse, he let the university mail everyone from science that he wrote that book, picture and all. Welp, I guess he can't help it.

The worst guy is the guy who just sits there and says nothing to anyone until asked a question and always looks nervous. Yes you.

>>3351955
>"When all the other kids were out at parties getting drunk and kissing each other, I was at home, writing it all down."

Is she pitching this book to customers or her mom?

>>3352089
What, no, that's not me. I'm a loud and crazy motherfucker. Chatting up all the bitches and laughing with the tutor. You don't know /lit/ at all.

>>3351955
Wait, how many books did she write?

>>3351955
>Open up first excerpt.
>Prequel is spelled wrong.
>What follows is a nauseating schlick-fantasy.
>I was melting inside.
>He glared at me without blinking
>There was a bond of desire.

>>3352111
I thought that was relevant for a while, too, but then:
>Livia Austin lives in the small isolated town of Moore Valley surrounded by vast forests. More than anything, she wants to escape the dead end town and out into the real world. But something seems to keep stoping her. The mysterious Jackson Wyler enters her highschool and immediately they are drawn together. Then there is Everett, who is lethally dangerous and saves her life multiple times. From first sight she knows he is not an ordinary human being and has some bizarre interest in her.

>>3352122
I figured as much, but there are like 6 books there by her.

Ugh. I'm so disgusted right now.

>>3351955
>I grew fascinated as I listened to all of my sensing.

>>3352025
And if the girl tells him to stop bothering her it's "she's such a bitch! Why me!?"

Good fucking god.

I am ever more thankful of my pre-social media highschool days.

(Is there more of this cringe worthy story?)

>>3352164

>"she's such a bitch! Why me!?"

that's because most "nice guys" aren't nice at all, they have the same arrogance as alphas without any of the game.

>>3348934
>with the highest eloquence of his or her vocabulary

LOLWUT. Poetry has nothing to do with the eloquence of your vocabulary, you shit-eating faggot.

>>3348946
Just piling on to point out what a loser you are.

>>3351644
I'm a STEM major and I've never once encountered any of that bullshit.

>>3352246
It's maybe one in 50 people are like that, but it's inoften you don't bump into that many people. It's also an issue with top unis and people having chips of shoulders.

>>3352250

I'm at Liverpool, but I've heard that Bristol and Sheffield are full of Oxbridge rejects.

>>3351773

I think reading about and not watching films is retarded. It's like reading literary theory and hoping to apply it to 5 books you have read. It's interesting to note you say Godard though, who was an avid cinephile before he started making films. Reading about film is important but so too is being able to open your horizons.

I'm pretty opinionated I suppose. I hate all the 'filmmakers' I met at University and whereas I mean to lump you in with them because I don't know you, none of the ones I met anything but an interest in mainstream cinema. I even watched some of their end of year films and really they all seem like technical products more so than anything else; sometimes just shameless rip-offs or commercial-like. Obviously nothing is going to be nuanced as a student but none of them liked thinking outside of the box because they were taught how to make good looking films, rather than push ideas. I wish they had of watched films because having a conversation with them about Pulp Fiction, Drive or Transformers was nothing but inane.

Autodidactic film-makers seem to be better from my experience.

>>3351792
>theater
>high art

Tell me more about how deep Broadway musicals are.

There were some novices in the creative writing program who were simply awful writers, but they didn't bother me much.
What bothered me was the asshole in the back of my literary seminar who would interrupt everything. The professor had an "interesting" way to reconsider roll call, and would pose questions rather than taking the usual approach.
This guy would give his thoughts on anybody's responses, presenting his own subjective analysis as blatant fact. He was really loud about it too.
And then when we were approaching Plato (I think as a simple aside), he referred to him as "the guy who whacked off little boys". I might not be fond of Plato, but to interject that in a college class... it's beyond my comprehension.

>>3352309
>all theatre is musical theatre

You are, as the French say, fucking retarded.

>>3349318
You mean Sasha Grey?
Yeah, she pisses me off too a little.

>>3352309
Oh god, I can't stop laughing at you.

>>3352309
>inb4 it was merely a ruse

>>3352309

1deep2u

>That one guy that reads old, shitty books from not-so-great authors to make himself seem more enlightened about literature

>>3352312
>>3352328
>>3352330
>>3352336

Fuck off.

I'm smart, and if all that's known about theatre in today's age is 'Broadway', then I guess it wasn't worth much to begin with, now was it?

>>3352347
Oh god, stop, I'm going to rupture a lung in a minute!

>>3351644
Hey want to hear something REALLY gross for us STEM guys?

That smell of microbiology.

>>3352347

inb4 everybody responds to the "i'm smart" comment because being perceived as smart is the only thing anybody cares about on this board.

>>3351644

Electrical engineers don't really even know much about Maxwell's equations, though.

>>3352352
>if i'm completely ignorant about an art form, it MUST suck!

it's beyond my comprehension how someone can be this idiotic.

>>3352306
>u, none of the ones I met anything but an interest in mainstream cinema.
This

I am roommates with a film major and all he watches is mainstream films. I mentioned David Lynch before and he didn't even know who I was talking about. Same with Godard. I don't believe he has ever seen a noir film either.

>>3352352
>I'm smart
>Anonymous board
It's a good thing you aren't any dumber, or you wouldn't have the cognitive ability to post at all.

>>3351749
>You're spouting a lot of edgy nonsense

No I am not.

Here is what she wrote: 1/2

Anabel: (to Lucian) I can’t even count how many times we’ve gotten detention because of you.
Cicero: It’s not his fault though.
Lucian: Shut up, Anabel. I rather be at Comic Con, too.
Anabel: Well, now we’re stuck in Saturday school and missing out on everything because of you. Hope you’re proud.
Lucian: You didn’t have to defend me.
Anabel: Well, unlike you I stand up for my friends.
Cicero: Will you guys give it a rest.
Lucian: She started it.
Anabel: What’re we 12 now?
Cicero: Enough!
They all start doing different things: Anabel starts reading, Lucian starts playing games on his phone, and Cicero falls asleep.
45 minutes later.
Anabel: Have you guys noticed that Davis hasn’t come to check in on us?
Cicero: How long has it been?
Anabel: About 45 minutes.
Lucian: What in the world? We could’ve gotten out of here or at least attempted too.
Cicero: That’s not the point, what could he possibly be doing that he didn’t come in to check up on us?
Anabel: I’m not willing to find out.
Lucian: Fine, stay here.
Anabel: There is not a single soul dwelling in this school.
Cicero: Not even one. Where’s Davis’ office?
Lucian: You want to go into Davis’ office? Are you stupid?
Anabel: Obviously not as stupid as the idiot who got us into this place.

>>3352834
2/2
Lucian: No one asked you to talk.
Cicero: I’m not stupid I just want to see if he’s in his office.
Anabel: Right here. (looks in) there’s no one in here guys. (opens door.)
Lucian: What in the world are you doing? We’re going to be screwed.
Anabel: Just shut it no one is in here.
Cicero: Guys, look at this.
Lucian: What is all this?
Anabel: Information on Principal Haynes he shouldn’t have. Records of where he’s traveled too, bills he’s paid, taxes, credit card usage. What in the world? Information on his college roommates, too apparently.
Lucian: How long has Vice Principal Davis been around?
Anabel: Since forever, he’s just never been promoted to principal.
Cicero: Do we know why?
Anabel: From what I’ve heard he’s got some kind of history but that’s all I know.
Cicero: But if he’s trying to get dirt on Principal Haynes that’ll just get him fired not get himself promoted.
Lucian: Unless whatever Principal Haynes has done is worse and he uses that and says it some kind of discrimination.
Cicero: You think he’s willing to take this to court and go through all that?
Lucian: Well it must be humiliating to never get promoted.
Cicero: Guys, he’s not trying to dig up dirt on Principal Haynes, he’s trying to frame him. Points to computer of ideas.
Lucian: What kind of an idiot puts all his desires in a notepad on the computer.
Cicero: You said it yourself, an idiot.

>>3350198
There's nothing wrong with fedoras. It's the people who wear them that are the problem. You can't throw on a fedora with a t-shirt and jeans, and except not to look like an utter cunt. It takes a special kind of person to pull one off nowadays. I had a picture of some dude in full fedora, suit, and coat get-up, and he looked boss but I can't seem to find it now.

>>3351764
WERE THEY HOT

>>3352834
>>3352836
Seems legit.

>>3348908
Dude, that's like a first step in life. They'll later realize what a fool they were and complain about people doing that and then they'll realize that that is a teen actitude and mature.

>>3352836
Shit that's painful.

The cunt who is severely opinionated and incredibly ignorant. They exist in every program. I've never met anyone who comes close to this one chick in my microeconomics class.

>>3348934
>with the highest eloquence of his or her vocabulary
Just... just... die, dude.

>>3348936
I see myself in every post, even contradictory ones.

>>3352880
This.

>>3352881
You may want to get a monitor with a matte screen.

The girl in my seminars who, whenever we're discussing something to do with post-colonialism or issues pertaining to race, will ALWAYS bring up how she "has a black boyfriend" and act as if this is somehow relevant or gives her a deeper, more profound connection to/ understanding of the text.

>>3350072
There are some periods that most film students go through.
When you start seeing how things are done you lose the inmertion in the movie since you are seeing beyond the show. This is really common in first year, it goes away after a while. Then you may have some sort of pressure because each film feels like a chord more than a pleassure. On one hand you're analyzing it so it isn't a relaxing activity to do when you have some free time, on the other hand is the thingyou're supposed to love.

Some people say shit aboutit poluting their own art and then makebasic mistakes because they don't know shit,that alsocan be a reasson.

>majoring in english

ISHYGDT

>>3351732
I wish I could be someone's socratic butt-buddy and make new ideas and shit.

>>3352919
At least you know you don't have a chance.

So basically, I go to a mid-tier British university. Its no Oxford, but its no Southbank either. I'm doing a Professional Writing/History course. On the Prof Writing course, I expected lots of discussion on literature. Instead I find that most people are pretty much completely inexperienced when it comes to literature. When we had to introduce ourselves and our favourite authors, I stood up and mumbled something about Hemingway and sat down, everyone else bar a couple of people said JK Rowling or Stephanie Meyer. Can't say I'm not disappointed. There were a couple of other serious readers in the class, one is some reddit fedora wearer, but he's alright.

The lecturers love me though.

>>3352025
Could you share some context around that pic?

>>3353062

Oh snap, Hemingway-man coming through!

"..oh I love that student, he even knows Hemingway."

>>3353062
>having to introduce yourself to the class

What exactly is "Professional Writing/History", anyway?

>>3352306
Here they teach you about Tarkovsky and Kieslowski in first year and how to make a proper lighting situation in second or third. People dopretentious shit whith trite methaphors.

I think the problem is most film students are realy stupid and chose a carrer based on "I like watching movies"

>>3353088
I'm doing a dual hons course. You get to pick two subjects, mine were professional writing and history. Its not one subject.

>>3353080
I tried to sound as un-arrogant as possible if thats what you're implying.

>>3352817
And Lynch and Godard are pretty maistreamy. I mean, the first one has have movies in international cinemas, the second is the first director you grab when you consider maybe starting to watch grwon up films.

>>3352834
>45 minutes later.
Why? If he hasn't been shown before why doyu have to add an external mark when even there's the dialogue to give that information?

>>3353118
>godard
>grown up
pls go
godard is a visionless hack.

>>3353105
Don't worry. Hemingway should be a middle point between arrogant and... un-arrogant.You knowpeople that doesnt't appear in tv, but he wasa bro writing about being a bro.

>>3353157
That was why I said him actually. I've read much more 'high brow' shit, but I didn't want to be THAT guy.

>>3353160
He didn't use to be. As I say, is baby's first try at notorious film making. Is it really that hard to read what I wrote?

>>3352834
This woman's a creative writing major? Is this a community college? Isn't there some sort of elimination process. This feels like the script to a children's movie.

That one kid who stutters and loves John Keats (to be fair, he's a very well-read and funny guy... I just can't stand those his stuttering and his John Keats masturbation).

That giant single mom who is a half-native american feminist that will not wait three seconds to mention any of those traits in a conversation that has nothing to do with them.

The geeky girl who has "Finish the Fight" tattooed on her back and a Big Daddy/Little Sister tattooed on her wrists. okay, we get it! You're an "authentic gamer grrrrl." Good for you!! But I don't need to hear about it! I like video games too, but you use your tattoos as an excuse to act like you're the queen of all the vidya. Also, if I hear you say, "Yo, Professor A totally loves me" or "I'm gonna get an A because Professor B thinks I'm the best" one more fucking time, I am going to skin your tattoos straight off your skin and feed them to you.

>>3349021
>not listing dunning-krueger effect
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect

>>3353224
>I just can't stand those his stuttering
That is cruel. I bet he hates his stutter too.

>>3353224
i don't see why you're so upset about somebody else's tattoos. If she isn't being obnoxious about showcasing her love for vidya other than having those tattoos, why do you care?

>English majors

HAHAHAHA faggots

>>3352834
>Cicero: Will you guys give it a rest.

I lost it here.

>>3353353
>2012
>Not being an english major

Is studying law a good idea?

>>3350235
In this case, he is wrong because The Outsider was published in 1942

>>3353378
Not at the moment, no. Unless you're family has a firm and you've got a job secured.

>>3352875

what was she like?

>>3353403
That's irrelevant. It can be a fine interpretation, it just can't be said that it's what the author intended.

Though interpreting everything as allegory is simplistic shit, I think.

>>3353350
and think that guy's whole point was that she WAS obnoxious about her love for vidya

>>3353404
this. its all irrelevant if you dont know someone already in, UK at least

the hipster


oh wait.

>>3353404
I'm not from the US though

>>3353413
Our professor was talking before class about how it's difficult for people even with advanced degrees to find work, and this bitch kept going on about how aerospace engineers and shit should work at McDonalds. Then when the professor said it's not that easy because employers are looking for long-term employees rather than people who will constantly be looking for something better, she said that was as an excuse for lazy people.

Other people actually started asking her to stop talking and that only riled her up and made her start speaking louder.

>>3353463
She obviously never applied to a McDonald's while having a degree. All hiring managers are flat-out told not to hire people with degrees (because, yes, they know that a job at McDonald's is only short-term to these people). They don't even consider such applicants, so how could it be a matter of "laziness"?

the girl that always gives a radical feminist reading

>>3353487
>plied to a McDonald's while having a degree. All hiring managers are flat-out told not to hire people with degrees (because, yes, they know that a job at McDonald's is only short-term to these people). They don't even consider such applicants, so how could it be a matter of "laziness"?
It's easy enough to simply not include the fact you have a degree on your résumé.

>>3353421
Had Camus written it during and after the war, such a view would be workable - but if there is no possibility of an author having meant something, how could it be a legitimate interpretation

>>3353508
Yeah, but they'll catch on as soon as you start talking with your fancy academic jargon and Paul Simon references.

>>3353508
Hey, that's an awesome idea. But wait, what about during the interview when they ask what the fuck you've been doing for the past four to six years of your life?

>>3353546
>flipping burgers
>manager jumps out from behind the deep fat fryer and tells you to provide an in-depth analysis of the first chapter of Ulysses
>before you realise what he's done it's five hours later and you have already given him a PhD-thesis-length talk on the text
>fired

>>3353551
>Not having at least a part-time job for the past four to six years of your life
You deserve unemployment.

>>3353554
I dream about this kind of stuff happening.

>>3353551

Welcome to McDonalds.

>>3353551
Just tell them you were in the pen.

>>3351686
There's this one guy in most of my classes who has the biggest hard-on for David Foster Wallace. He seems to draw so much of his worldview from the writings of David Foster Wallace that we've (everyone else including the teachers) call him "Foster" because that's how he begins roughly eight out of ten of his uninsightful, boring interjections in class. The other two times he says anything are when he announces that he needs to deposit a little tinkle in the restroom or that he has to "check the screen." One of the girls in our class who had went to the bathroom prior to him leaving to "check the screen" found him browsing The Huffington Post on his phone around the corner of the hallway, and apparently he seemed flustered and quickly put the phone up to his ear and said some form of goodbye and then pretended to hang up.

So, sup Foster, I'm sure you're cognizant of this.

>>3353556
I'm sorry, but you're dumb as fuck. Do you know how many students are in college without part-time jobs, and there are already not enough jobs to go around?

What would happen if every student in college also started working? That is an enormous labor force being dumped into an already largely unemployed populace vying for whatever jobs they can get.

You also clearly never lived in a small, college town. You're ignorant as fuck, man.

>>3353585
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYGYokP18oU

>>3353598
No intelligent response. Interesting.

>>3353585
I'm living in a small college town right now, and I have two jobs. It took thirty applications to get them, but I did it.

From personal experience and the experiences of those around me I've learned that one can't hold or even acquire a job that follows from a college education without having worked a single day in your life in any occupation whatsoever. The workforce is a very different environment from college and requires much more responsibility/accountability.

Plus, if you aren't working during college, you're basically siphoning money off your parents and/or taking out unrealistic loans you'll end up paying until you're thirty. Even if you're in college on a scholarship, you still have to pay for basic necessities, i.e. clothing, entertainment, etc. Why burden your sponsors more than necessary?

>>3353585
I'm living in a small college town right now, and I have two jobs. It took thirty applications to get them, but I did it.

From personal experience and the experiences of those around me I've learned that one can't expect to hold or even acquire a job that follows from a college education having not worked a single day in their life in any occupation whatsoever. The workforce is a very different environment from college and requires much more responsibility/accountability.

Plus, if you aren't working during college, you're basically siphoning money off your parents and/or taking out unrealistic loans you'll end up paying until you're thirty. Even if you're in college on a full-ride scholarship (which is highly unlikely anyway), you still have to pay for basic necessities, i.e. clothing, entertainment, etc. Why burden your sponsors more than necessary?

>>3353612
You treat employment as a mystical vaccuum of jobs. Interesting.

>how many students are in college without part-time jobs
they are lazy

>already not enough jobs to go around
false
not enough of the kinds of jobs you feel entitled to

>clearly never lived in a small college town
i have and this has nothing to do with anything
you can even get a job within your fucking college

>>3353627
>>3353629
Both of you are missing the whole point. I worked through college, but the only reason I was able to do so is because so many students did not work. This was even before the full brunt of the recession hit, and even then it was very difficult to find so much as part-time work.

You're a total rockstar for thinking all the unemployed students are "lazy", but you have to understand that the only reason a lot of people have jobs in college is just because a majority of the students there don't.

This isn't a complicated point to understand. I don't know how many times I can rephrase it.

>>3353546
>implying you can't engage plebspeak mode

>>3353647
How is your argument any different from arguing for trickle-down economics? "Rich kids can take money from their rich parents so I can have their jobs!" Your argument is 100% debatable, and in fact it is debated, almost 24/7, on every news channel and in every political treatise on the planet.

>>3351955

>>3353647
At what point did anyone say that every college kid should have a job?

It's just unrealistic for college kids to expect to get their dream job in their subject of study, when they don't have the first clue of how a business works.

>>3353671
Easy. I'm not talking about money, I'm talking about unemployment. Notice how we're not talking about good wages vs. minimum wages. We're talking employment history and holding a job.

I'm not even talking about money, I'm talking about the simple resource of a job. You both are talking as if jobs are a limitless resource. This is just not the case. In certain cities, the competition is high even for your average job at McDonald's, so you can imagine what it's like for more prestigious careers.

A good example is this guy, who said > I have two jobs. It took thirty applications to get them, but I did it.

Imagine how much more difficult it would have been for him to land a job if all the other students he schools with were in competition for the same jobs he applied for. Someone else probably would have gotten the job over him, or someone could have already held the job and therefore the opportunity to even apply wouldn't have been there.

The economy is not in a state where jobs are abundant. Quite the contrary.

I'm an unemployed student and I've applied to roughly five jobs a day since the start of the new year and have only gotten one call back. I know five apps a day isn't shit, but I don't actually want to work because I fear it will make me become intellectually idle and bitter and cut into my non-scholastic studies. I'm aware that's selfish, but fuck, you only live once (copyright drake)

>>3353713
But your argument is essentially saying that more rich people => fewer college students in need of employment => more jobs for lower class citizens. Therefore, we should try to make a wider class divide to allow one class of people to support their jobless children throughout life while the other class to have jobs.

B-b-but that makes sense, right?

>>3353738
That is not my argument. This is my argument: jobs are a resource, and resources should go to those who are most in need. If there is a student of rich parents who plans to devote all his time to his or her studies, and they try very hard to get a terrific GPA, they should not be considered "lazy" just because they are unemployed.

I have known students who worked through college, and they did just as horrible a job in their studies as they did at their job. I consider these people to be far more lazy (half-assing every task they had to do, whether it was in academics or not) than your unemployed student who studies rigorously.

Ergo, if someone can devote all their time to their studies and neglect getting a job (in every sense, leaving the job field alone so that those who need the jobs more may obtain them) then they should not be knocked for being "lazy", because that is often just not the case.

>>3353554

>tfw this will never happen to you

I've applied for seventy jobs and got one interview so far.

At least 30 of those were McDonald's/Starbucks style jobs and the rest were the bottom rung of better industries, mostly internships.

Not an Engish major but I am a Creative Writing student, and I feel like we are brothers of a sort so I will share.

There are definitely a lot of odd characters, and a lot of bad writers. Which is kind of funny sometimes but also wildly depressing at other times. I think it's because when they try hard they can shit something out that is technically competent, and most of the marking only really reflects that.

There's this one guy from like Sweden or whatever who only writes ridiculous fantasy. He's constantly telling everyone about this fantasy novel he's writing. Interuptting seminars and shit to mention some retarded point then dropping in his novel. I haven't read any of it, but those that have say it's pretty much straight up Tolkein/Paolini rip-off. I was sceptical about how much they were just talking shit because most people find him annoying, but then one time we read his "homage" to Lovecraft in class that was only like Lovecraft in the parts that were blatantly copied -- the rest being extremely poor.

There's also a fair few of "those" mature students on my course. One of them in my Scriptwriting 101 class last year constantly had her shitty netbook out and would stop everything to Google shit that didn't need googling thank you very much. One time this woman recommended Spongebob Squarepants to everyone as great scriptwriting for no reason for like a full ten minutes.

Also there was this one quite old lady who wrote kind of weird kinda sexual stuff set in the past and would then always mention that the stories were true. The way she did it was creepy. And they were really unnecessarily sexual too. That one woman would always be like "I don't really get it" about all of my work, despite everyone else getting it fine. She would say "maybe it's a generation thing", but then another actually cool mature student about her age would get it, and always sort of roll her eyes.

JESUS GUYS WHY ARE THEY DOING DEGREE COURSES

>>3353869
Have fun in your class. It's a great environment, a CW one. Some good characters and you're meant to have fun in it, not many get jobs from it. I loved mine.

>>3352836
>"What in the world?"
>twice
Are you sure she's not a thirteen-year-old?

>>3353886
>tfw I don't understand why her script is shit
>tfw I'm probably a stupid retard who writes terrible stuff
>tfw retard

>>3353889
Just imagine someone actually saying those things in real life. The same punctuation, tone, and timing. You can't.

>>3353929
I don't enjoy drama. Is that supposed to be one of the main tenets of it? That it's somewhat imaginable in real life? And yes, people saying those things would be incredibly cheesy. I guess it is like a b-list rom-com.

>>3351783
I don't usually agree with anything Zizek says, but Post-Colonialism is a bunch of bullshit. It's only an accepted field because of the guilt of liberal scholars.

>>3353929
Of course I can. It reads like bad TV writing. There are people who talk like bad TV shows.

>>3352089
hey baby you like books? ah me too wow it sure is warm in this class well time to go ah damn my chair is caught on the leg of the desk god wow this is an awkward manoeuvre i'm really in a tight spot here huh oh wow my pen fell out of my pocket this is really awful today damn well see ya later alligator

>>3353951
s-sorry

i just want to convey an air of mystique and now that i have it i don't want to talk and reveal that i'm a pretentious tryhard who people mistake for an intellectual ;_;

>>3352188
>most "nice guys" aren't nice at all, they have the same arrogance as alphas without any of the game.

so... true...

hey lit i love ya even you assholes i even like you
its all cool gys yeah

>English majors: describe the worst person in your program.
My teacher

Enough shit about fedoras, nice guys, and post-colonialism. Let's here some more stories.

>>3353934
>what is mimesis

>>3353989
Thanks bud. I know I'm a bretentious cunt.

>>3354003
Well I know some bitch kissass who loves some shit fantasy writer, she wrote to her on FB and sent her a piece of her writing. Her writing is long, dreary crap. Often comprised of fifteen plus pages for a 5 page assignment. She got some positive throwaway comment from said shitty fantasy writer and never shuts up about it.

>>3353118

A bit of an injustice to both filmmakers to judge their films solely on their audience. However, yes they are exactly the kinds of film-makers I was into when I was 16. They are - as you have described - not particularly difficult.

I still like Godard though. After the whole Dziga-Vertov period he become very hit or miss considering his politics (which at times are laughably simple) and his early films are overrated at this point (Breathless notably). I still think Week End is fantastic and Masculin Feminin is a neat and unapologetic representation of gender differences (in youth at least and i'm 22 so it's still relevant to me).

>>3353106

I'm jealous of that kind of approach. I took Film theory classes mostly. The issue I found is that as >>3352958
described, people get way into treating films as technical products and they lose focus on making something with any meaning, rather than something that ticks technical boxes.

I need to buy a cheap camera and get into some auto-didactic film-making. I bet they were great for getting to know the inner-workings.

I honestly don't understand why you fags don't just go into teaching instead of 'flipping burgers'. If you're intelligent enough to get an English degree from an RG uni, you're intelligent enough to do a PGCE. The 'there are no jobs' argument is not an excuse; there are always hundreds, if not thousands, of secondary education jobs on various sites.

You see one, you shoot one.

>BEE is the best!
>He thinks biology is a science
>Computer science? laughingphysicists.jpg
>Quattrocento was mediocre at best, abstract is just too deep for you
>because freud said..
>I think I'll play everyali at my next recital
>muh finnegans wake is better
>I'm into neo-post-restructural existential sarcasm but I do it ironically
>physics? laughingmathematicians.jpg
>muh citizen kane
>Tonal music? fucking pleb, atonal masterace

etc..

>>3354025

We all spend our time on the internet. We don't have the mental toughness to be a teacher.

>>3353782
>That is not my argument. This is my argument: jobs are a resource, and resources should go to those who are most in need.
By that logic, we should redistribute all wealth to those in need. Why stop at jobs?

>f there is a student of rich parents who plans to devote all his time to his or her studies, and they try very hard to get a terrific GPA, they should not be considered "lazy" just because they are unemployed.
If they aren't employed then they should be volunteering and building a portfolio in that sense. There's no sense in sitting on your ass sucking up "resources" (such as money), even if you get an A in Gender Studies.

>Ergo, if someone can devote all their time to their studies and neglect getting a job (in every sense, leaving the job field alone so that those who need the jobs more may obtain them) then they should not be knocked for being "lazy", because that is often just not the case.

Whether they are lazy or not, they still have zero job experience and shouldn't expect a job straight out of college unless their parents work connections for them. They simply don't have the experience or business-type work ethic to deserve it.

>>3354048
/sci/ really is full of solipsistic, narcissistic cretins.

>>3354065
That's your problem, then. If you want a cushy teaching experience, get a job at an independent school. Most of the time, as long as you have a 1st-class degree, you don't even need a PGCE.

>>3351743
apparently so. i realize that workshops are often circle jerks and you need to preface every criticism with 3 things you like about the piece because authors are so touchy, but i really couldn't care less. i like to get straight to the point and in this case that was to go back to the drawing board.

>In my gender/race studies elective (spirit of the OP if not the letter)
>Surrounded my brainless Tumblr idiots
>professor is a flamboyant homo (nothing Wong with that, it's just so cliche)
>we discuss sexuality and this girl stands up as if she was in a fucking talkshow audience and begins whimpering about how she has been hit on by guys despite being a lesbian, class is full of sympathy and anger at these monstrous crimes *eye twitch*

Cont...

>>3354025
They pay less than those burger flipping jobs.

>>3352306
Except that theory and criticism haven't applied to just literature for over thirty years now.

>>3354112
>a few lessons later we are discussing genital mutilation in Africa, we watch a very graphic film about it. These cute little girls are having their privates cut off because of their stupid culture, all of my rage.
>"but of course all cultures are equal" and my classmates bravely spring up to defend the non-white patriarchy. "It's not our culture", "who are we to judge", " different doesn't mean worse" and then came the kicker
>this is no worse than vaginal plastic surgery that the western media forces women to get, in fact we are worse. Class is looking on with stars in their eyes at this brave warrior-princess of cultural relativism.
>this is the last straw, I attempt to refute her but I'm a typical shy /lit/izen, this is the first time I've spoken in class in a year, I'm a little scared of girls and I was in hostile territory. My rousing speech came out as a terrified whisper, my voice and body was trembling and I felt sick with anxiety.
>Xena turns on me and just yells incoherently, I'm too beta to defend myself and she shuts me down.
>afterwards the class fucking claps at her and I just wanna die, I don't come to class after this and I end up getting a Z and failing.

>>3354112
>>3354169
>*

Get out.

>>3353088
>having to introduce yourself to the class
That's fairly common in workshop. After all, you will be eviscerating each other come the third week of class.

>>3353508
>McDonald's
>Resume
That would disqualify you just as quickly.

>>3354169
By the way it sounds like I'm a /pol/ tier fascist with a hint of /r9k/ misogyny but I'm definetly a feminist it's and non-racist, those people just got on my nerves.
>>3354180
Green text has a beautiful form to it, you peasant. Not to mention how effectively it boils down a story to its basics,

>>3353698
>At what point did anyone say that every college kid should have a job?

That was the genesis of this conversation you're having. Perhaps scrolling up and rereading it would help you.

>>3353877
Yeah it's mostly fun. Not many get jobs from any BAs at the moment anyway. Ha.

Gonna drink myself to death at 25, don't worry.

>>3354210
I was referring to your use of asterisks, you clueless cunt.

This time, with gusto: Get Out.

>>3353713
Those thirty applications are nothing. I spent ninety-nine weeks on unemployment, turned in thousands of resumes and applications and never got a single callback. Guess that's why I'm in a graduate program now.

>>3353935
I never implied you had to agree with everything those post-colonial writers argued. I just said anyone questioning the difficulty of English studies should give those two writers a whirl, because it might change their perspective on things.

>>3354228
What was your degree?

>>3354068
>4chan really is full of solipsistic, narcissistic cretins
ftfy

>>3354083
You're entirely wrong about workshop. It's not a circle jerk and you don't preface your evisceration of a given manuscript with unearned kindness. But the goal of your evisceration should always be to produce a better version of the manuscript. Your criticism needs to be constructive. Getting "straight to the point" and calling something "dumb" is not particularly constructive. Why isn't it working for you? Is it the characters? Is it their motivations or their lack of motivations? Does the protagonist just stand inert as the world moves around him? Is the dialogue too "writerly?" Does a coincidence save the protagonist at the end? What? It's okay to think something is dumb, but expecting that decree to suffice for real criticism is fairly childish.

>>3354169
Why on earth would a professor teaching a class on gender and race studies condone female genital mutilation? This is a bridge too far for me. I'm not buying this.

>>3351777
How did you get into technical writing? What did you major in?

>>3353956
y-you too...

>>3354317
>flamboyant homo
>loves the dick about all else
>probably has mother issues
>hates the vagina

>not a woman-hater