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/lit/ - Literature

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3111416 No.3111416 [Reply] [Original]

>No idea if this is the right board, but here goes.

I'm writing a story told from the first person, and at the very beginning is my protagonist waking up.

I can't seem to wrap my mind around how I should describe the events, since, anyone's whose been half asleep and gradually woken up should know, it's hard to describe, you just sort of do it.

Since this would be the first paragraph or two to my story I'd have to make it full of depth and feeling. Maybe a hint of a dream, or some personality.

Anyways, that's my question. Thanks.

>> No.3111417

Show don't tell

>> No.3111423

>ITT: Please explain to me how to write

>> No.3111426

Seriously? This is the kind of shit you have to figure out yourself. It takes time and a fuckload of effort, both of which you're currently wasting on this stupid board. Get back to writing and maybe in a few months or a few years you'll be solid

>> No.3111437

>>3111423

Now sir, that's not exactly right. I understand to place myself into the character's POV and tell the story as they would see it, their thoughts and feelings.

This is an unique case where they aren't fully conscious and I'm wondering how I show that in a story that's meant to be told in the first person present tense.

I don't simply assume a third person narrative and describe their surroundings, I want them to be groggy and unaware and slowly visualize their surrounds.

>> No.3111446

>>3111416
You seriously can't find another author who has written a scene like that?

>> No.3111463

>>3111416
OP, I hope I can help, here it goes.

This is the kind of feeling you can only experience when you're not really yourself.
It was an itching experience. This morning I woke up and I felt in the shoes of Sean John Combs. Immediately I figured this wasn't the usual morning.
I reached for my glasses, thinking positively. I would go out of the house and grab the city by the horns.
Before leaving, I thought it was wise to go to the bathroom and brush my teeth. The water faucet was leaking, but not working, so I had to use a bottle of Jack Daniels instead. All the while I was thinking how wonderful tonight would be - I definitely wouldn't be coming back to this place.

You can work from this, OP.

>> No.3111493

Read the first few pages of Native Son by Richard Wright

>> No.3111510
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3111510

>>3111416
Because I can only assume you're going to try and get this published, here goes nothing:

1. "I'm awake but I'm still a little groggy and stuck in a fugue" beginnings are overdone. A few minutes on Google will confirm this if you doubt me.

2. "it's hard to describe, you just sort of do it" is probably a better description than any expository, semi-lyrical horseshit you could dream up. If you can't find the words, write about the experience honestly.

3. Dreams are boring. There's a reason you have a hard time remembering them after you wake up. Stay away from them.

>> No.3111518

>>3111463
>All dose adverbs.
>All dose idioms.
>All dat laziness.

You're funny.

>> No.3111573

>>3111518
>not understanding it was a joke
>not picking up on dose Kesha lyrics

You're stupid.

>> No.3111594

>>3111518
>Completely ignoring the endearing "You're funny" remark.

No, anon.

You are the stupid.

>> No.3111604

>>3111594
B-but you said it with a depreciation tone.. didn't you?

>> No.3111619

>>3111604
Difficult to pick up tone from an entirely text-based medium.

>> No.3111621

Write about the main character enjoying the feeling of his morning wood rubbing against the bed. That shit's god tier.