/lit/ - Literature

Smoked too many bongs and now I gotta get to class.

Shit. I hope there wasn't homework.

Faster, Igor! Faster!

>>3042003
>He just sits there as if in stoic admiration of this sudden explosion of death.
>
>A frantic worker runs toward him to report but before he can open his mouth the man is asking, “How many?”
>
>“Three sir,” the man gasps, “maybe four.”
>
>“Mm-hmm” he murmurs, “tell those dumbfucks to get away from it.”
>
>“Yes sir.”

I liked it, although I didn't like the whole over dramatization.
>column of hell
>Sick black rose
>explosion of death
Cheesy as fuck, man.

>>3042003
The stoic man has too much buildup for such a lackluster statement. Hemingway never used the word "dumbfucks"

This thread is absolutely disgusting.

>>3042024
>>3042016
>"describe your pics faggots"
>respond with shitty criticisms instead of contributions
thick cunts

>>3042041
Maybe you shouldn't write like a fucking faggot then.

I guarantee you this fuck -- >>3042043 -- could not do better, which is exactly why he will remain a sad little heckler forever farting on the bleachers of life.

>>3042003

>A twisting column of hell rips into the sky

I stopped there.

>>3042041
That's just such a horrible idea from the start. And you started it all even worse than I thought it was possible. And now you are bitching about others in "your" thread? Get off /lit/ and never come back. This is dumb as fuck.

>>3042064
Oh, I could and I have.

>>3042070
>exercise requiring imagination and writing skill
>horrible idea
Again, all of you fucks are obviously hemorrhoidal over the fact that you are not up to the challenge of image description.

for some reason you are mad, and I think it's because you can't write for shit

>>3042092

>Says others are mad because they can't write for shit.
>Can't write for shit.

>>3042083
are you laughing at yourself?

cause you should be

>>3042098
I laugh at all things. Are you trying to hurt my feelings? Because you're doing a terrible job.
As if you could even if I weren't, I'm eating potato bread and drinking guava juice right now, and it's rad as fuck so I'm pretty much impervious for the next 15 minutes to just about everything. You should try it.

>>3042097
>perfectly composed sentences
>regal flow
>powerful images
>can't write for shit
IT'S BETTER THAN YOU CAN DO
prove me wrong

>>3042106
>trying to trick us into getting back on topic
You underestimate our apathy, kid.

>>3042106

You came here to impress me. I did not come here to impress you. So why should I be trying to prove you wrong. I know my writing is just where it should be... which is respectable. I, unlike you, don't come to /lit/ with awful writing and start spewing out vile like "I have perfectly composed sentences, regal flow, and powerful images". The only powerful image you have is the picture you put up... and that's because it IS an image. Now, instead challenging US to prove we are good writers... why don't you do what you came here to do and prove to US that YOU are a good writer.

Only one of us have failed so far.

>>3042070
No, you get off MY /lit/ and stay in your moldy neckbeard, where displays of individual creative effort seem stupid and pointless because you are a gigantic CREATOR OF BOREDOM
and, of course, a faggot

This may be the stupidest thread I've seen in a while.

and I frequent fucking /v/

also TWBB is a great movie

>>3042092
>>3042119
That's not creative work nor a good exercise in any way. Actually, this is boring as fuck, I'm not sure how you associate this with literature... It's really a very sad thread.

>>3042114
I did not come here to impress, smarty man, I came to compete, and yet none of you fucks can come out of your collective vagina

smelly shit

>>3042119
>Claiming ownership of an entire board
>rebuffs considered criticism with piss-poor insults
>butthurt because nobody cares about his shit
>has the creativity of a ten year old
>is probably 14
I think it's time to stop posting.

OP has used the term "fuck" as an insult in every post he has made.

Get creative, dude.

>>3042130

You can't compete in a triathlon when you're in a wheelchair. Learn to write first. THEN worry about competing. Because let me tell you something, "smarty man"... I don't criticize people here for my own throbbing erection. I do it because there are people who frequent /lit/ who blow you out of the fucking water... and I'm looking for them... not you.

>>3042136
>That's just such a horrible idea from the start.
>considered criticism
uh-huh

>>3042141
I WANT TO SEE IT

somebody please come blow me out of the water

I'm begging you

>>3042152

They're all over /lit/. Go take a look. You won't have to look far. Because 90% of the writer here are better than you. Writing is competitive kid. Get use to sucking. Because you, like we all did, are going to suck for quite awhile before you can write respectably.

>>3042146
>The stoic man has too much buildup for such a lackluster statement.
>I didn't like the whole over dramatization.
>Not trying to be helpful
Simmer down, Sparky.
Also
>posting shit on /lit/
>Getting buttmad when someone says something about it

>>3042162
Dude, you can't write respectably NOW, so what the fuck are you talking about?

I've been all over /lit/ and it's full of shit, in light of which calling OP's writing shitty is a pretty absurd statement

I noticed Dan was trying to hold in laughter, but when he laughed I couldn't hear him. It came out like throat-clicking, then his head crawled off his shoulders and scuttled up the wall and onto the ceiling, telling the same story of how he'd fucked my girlfriend.

He'd spiked my Coke. Again.

I woke up the next morning in the alley between a Denny's and Best Buy. A homeless man's mutt was licking the poop crescents from under my fingernails. I pushed the dog away and stood up, holding my grubby hands to my crotch. In the windows of the Best Buy, a flat-screen set to Fox told me it was 11:23.

Prom was in six hours.

>>3042041
Maybe it would help if you weren't such a shitty writer.

>>3042146
That is criticism.

>>3042188
This reminds me of something...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=puy52LVqG7c

>>3042190
Why would my "shitty" writing affect your ability to participate by choosing an image and attempting, however miserably, to describe it in the style of the last author you read.

>>3042188
Thank you for sharing that entertaining excerpt from your prom novel, but that's not really the game here

great job though

>>3042182

Writing respectably is not writing publishable material. I'm trying to be humble here. But that being said, given practice and time, it is in my opinion the first step of the "positive" tier of "writing statuses". Unfortunately, you are correct about one thing... there are a LOT of people on /lit/ who are far from respectable.mBut I don't think calling one's own writing "respectable" is going too far.

I mean, it's not like I'm using phrases like:
>perfectly composed sentences
>regal flow
>powerful images

>>3042202
>Thank you for sharing that entertaining excerpt from your prom novel, but that's not really the game here

IT'S AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY

Wait what game?

>>3042218
>AUTOBIOGRAPHY
Tell me more...

The image speaks for itself. If you were describing something you saw down the street yesterday, I would understand because I was not there and I don't know what you were thinking and feeling at that moment.

But a few pixels on a screen are not worth describing, you just make it look poor and vain, as I can see the image myself. The image you chose is yet an illusion created by the vision of another man and his production team, you see how artificial all of this can get?

This is a bad exercise as it does not acknowledge the treachery of images, the treachery of words and how they relate to each other. It can't be accurate or inaccurate, it can't make it more emotional or less emotional, as they are going to be perceived in combination and unless you use that combination to trick, there is nothing there to be seen, you make both things empty and uninteresting.

If still you want to describe images, make it a challenge to describe what is not there. Lie about it, make something up. Maybe that fire comes from a hidden dragon or an ass full of farts. Hell, any lie would be more interesting than disregarding the beauty of the trickery in language and just telling me what I must be seeing from the most common possible perspective (that things are what they are).

There is nothing creative about this at all, regardless of how cool it sounds what you have written (and on top if it all, it doesn't even achieve that in any way...).

I'm not alone here with this feeling. Awful thread.

I tried not to sob as I watched her spoon the corn pudding onto her plate.

She was beautiful. It was just a little after seven, and she was fully dressed, had even wiped away her eye crust, so I could focus on those eyes like a painted doll's. Completely blue, and with her red hair, I pictured us dancing in the highlands, wondering for a second if she was maybe Irish, but then no, she wouldn't have been up that early.

Oh, God, she was coming over to my area. Why did I pick sausage duty today? Jesus, her lips - a pair of rosey grubs frotting - oh, no, erection. Why did I wear slacks today? Why did I wear my Ghost in the Shell t-shirt today?

She was talking to me, oh Christ. This wasn't supposed to happen. My asshole puckered in terror as my brain drug through one-thousand /r9k/ stories.

"S-sausages," I stuttered, the off-brown of fear overtaking my vision. The last thing I remember seeing was her shoes as my cheek hit the tiles. Crocs...no.

>I still don't understand what I'm supposed to be doing.

>>3042251
you're mistaken, you ARE alone with your feeling. and you always will be.

confused, rambling shit-crock

>>3042232
Sure thing, brah.

---

I walked behind my uncle. I knew it was him because he had trouble stepping over the rotten fences that separated the properties, and he never washed the hem of his gown. Somehow, I had trouble picturing him going through with any of this nonsense, trying to reconcile this mess with that image of him telling us stories about his double-life in Tijuana, fixing washing machines by day and playing that guitar by night. It bothered me that he might be the norm. Folks all over could be doing this.

Stumbling through the mud, we were thankful that the hoods kept out the mosquitoes. I held my torch with two hands, feeling the dry comfort of the smoke hold off the damp. Wasn't too bad, I guess. Once you stop minding the feeling of being moist all the time, you get to appreciate the scenery.

I was thinking about Allen and how he was doing down in back when I first heard the boy crying. Okay, he wasn't a boy, but it's that inability to accept your lot that makes you a boy. Men don't cry when the judge pounds the gavel.

He stood on a blue stool under the lowest branch of an oak tree I remember playing under when I was ten. I don't remember painting the stool, but I knew that I did. That almost made the entire mess a personal affair, but I still knew it was just business. I could hear Allen's choppy breath over my left shoulder as my uncle motioned me forward to do it, and I did it, and when the boy stopped kicking, we all left.

Next day at soccer, Allen tried to talk to me about it all, but I didn't hear him.

All that nonsense was what we were by night, and I didn't feel like reconciling the two.

>>3042313
>I could hear Allen's choppy breath over my left shoulder as my uncle motioned me forward to do it, and I did it, and when the boy stopped kicking, we all left.
Is this murder or rape?

What we have here is a pussy-ass nigga.

Pff, keep cryin', bitch nigga.

Suck on yo granpappy's titty, why don'tcha?

>>3042297

>>3042031
>>3042043
>>3042069
>>3042070
>>3042126
>>3042133
>>3042137
Nope, I'm in good company.

>>3042318
>Is this murder or rape?

If I told you that it was open to interpretation, would that make me deep or just a faggot?

If the latter, then the answer is yes.

If the former, then the answers is also yes.

>>3042251
In fairness to OP, I don't think he is trying to invent an art form here, magritte.

the jews do some sex

>>3042335
Deep, yo.

*strokes neckbeard*

*ponders a biography of Tao Lin*

>>3042297

I think you're the confused one... because it seems everyone here thinks this is stupid, except you. It was a pretty solid deduction.

>>3042011
This brought me immense joy to read.