/lit/ - Literature

No

It depends on how big of a snob you are.

It's not the place but your game that matters.

The bookstore is a holy ground, unfit for such lustful approaches!

do i get to get laid in the end?

>>2398505
This is /lit/ so assume everyone is a snob.

>>2398514
Granted, but I said how big of a snob you are.

If you're a huge snob and scoff at anyone who reads Harry Potter or Twilight, flirting in a book store probably isn't a good idea.

Yes! Great place for casual hookups and starting relationships. Comment on something you see somebody reading in an offhand, casual way, but showing your knowledge and interest. Or just wait till they do it to you. I'm approached at least as often as I approach somebody. It's nice if there's a coffee shop there too, and if the staff is friendly toward you.

>>2398519
>I'm approached

attractive person detected, your advice is trivial

hover near your target, and when target reaches for a book, dart in and reach for the same book. then just smile.

>>2398526

I'm not insanely attractive. I'm tall, and I dress well, and I'm polite and friendly.
and well groomed.
and, um, a bodybuilder.

okay, point taken.
but I am occasionally assumed to be gay.

cheap easy lit related date at bookstore or library:
you and partner split up and find a book that looks interesting but haven't read before. find comfy seats, read up to a pre-designated number of pages, commenting on what you're reading, read to each other. you'll find out a lot about the other person in a short amount of time
especially if they agree to do this in the first place

>>2398547
but my girlfriend would choose shitty manga. i dont wanna sit through that.

I wouldn't mind it unless the guy was a creepster. I sometimes wander to the comics section hoping to find a /co/mrade but no luck... they're either super-silent or non-existent punks reading Bleach in the aisle.

>>2398566

The comic book/graphic novel aisle is a great choice, I picked up a chubby little necronerd reading Sandman in the back of the local Hastings. Started talking about Allan Moore and Witch Hunter robin and had her giggling and naked in my bed inside three hours. Kept her all last summer. She was a sweetheart.

>>2398591
Is this what you look like?

>>2398538
>works out a few times a week
>considers himself a bodybuilder

how adorable.

>>2398624

Six days a week. three hours a day. can jerk 310, which is the world record...for a girl.
Which I'm not.
I know, I know, But, then I don't use steroids...

>>2398637
>can jerk 310

I can jerk for hours, and I jerk like 2 times a second, so I got you beat by a mile.

>>2398621

Actually, yeah, kind of. Knock off a few years and give him a trim beard and glasses...

>>2398645

maybe, but only if you switch off arms...

>>2398648
I use my right hand mainly, but sometimes I use both hands too.

>>2398624
three days a week is ideal for building functional strength

>>2398637
three hours a day six days a week is silly.

>>2398591
suddenly I want to know more. I love picking up girls in the day time. Scary as hell, but once a good moment happens you wanna do it more.

You need a weighty book. I personally go for the Complete Works of Shakespeare, though it's a bit of a cliché. You then club them round the back of the head, and drag them back to your book cave.

>>2398660
>three days a week is ideal for building functional strength

what if i don't care about strength and just want to look good.

>>2398670
I love you for writing that. Hilarious.

>>2398660

It gets addictive. You make excuses to go more often, then excuses to stay longer, but you divide your days so that you're doing upper body/lower body on alternate days. with core on both.

I admit it's a pointless hobby, but like i said, addictive

>>2398674
Then exercise three days a week for 6-8 weeks, doing either 1 rep max lifts, or as close as you can get. Then take a break. Then start again. Also, eat a shit ton of food.

>>2398670

>>2398666

like i said, i have a lot of luck with it. It's good to go on a regular basis and give them a chance to see you and get used to you before you get overt. If you're part of the atmosphere and the staff like you, they let down their guard a good bit. I think it's important to have good intentions, too. I always go in hoping for something medium to long term, and I'm willing to take it slow if necessary. So far, i haven't had to.

>>2398674
then you are just silly. girls don't care 'bout your aesthetics man they just want to know that you can physically dominate them.

>>2398670
Atlas shrugged, and so did she as I Rand away with her limp body in my arms.

>>2398694
i can physically dominate a girl.

i just dislike what i see in the mirror, it's an intense feeling of disgust.

>>2398686
>1 rep max lifts, or as close as you can get. Then take a break. Then start again. Also, eat a shit ton of food.

what? why? forget it;this will turn into /fit/

>>2398700
Anorexia.

>>2398701
>this will turn into /fit/
too late for that but at least im saging.

>>2398694
>a poster on /lit/ giving girl advice

>>2398707
>implying girls don't like to be physically dominated

>>2398704
don't fit enough of the symptons

we can at least turn this thread into something /lit/ related. you are all aware that there is a multitude of literature out there on 'the art of the pickup'?

>>2398714
don't call that shite literature please

>>2398714
You are aware there are a multitud of con artists writing "literature".

>>2398714

You don't need art. And if you just want to pick up a lot of different girls, then bookstores aren't going to work for you. They get to know you there and being superficial and creepy will get you a very cold shoulder indeed.

They're good places for good girls, both for short and long-term things, But you need to be a good catch, not just fake it.

>>2398716
>>2398717
things like eye contact and mirroring are not just for con artists you dumb nignogs still saging this retarded thread

>>2398722
Well this is /lit/ so i'm assuming most people posting here are not "faking" being in a bookstore.

this thread
is basically just a /fit/ thread

i'm out

if you socially awkward basement dwellers want some literature to get you into a mindset for meeting women read Without Embarrassment by Michael Pilinksi. It's really even good just on it's own, for breaking you of your delusional perceptions and self inflicted egotism.

Well, Borders closed and only B&N is open

Most of the time people just pick up a book, buy it, and leave

Times I go, either no one is there, it's just old people, or no one is in the area I'm browsing.

>>2398724


"mirroring", for god's sake.
Just be nice.

And dominating them physically? The average guy can do that to any girl he runs into. Why would that be a selling point?

Be friendly, be polite, be interesting if you can and be causal. talk, and listen.

And when you get somewhere with a girl, don't dump her after a couple dates and run back looking for another one.

The little goth-y girl I picked up for the summer could make espresso, deep-throat, liked camping and could hold up her end of a conversation. Why would I assume I could do better on a second try?

There are some good girls out there, but you need to be good to them.

i tend to walk to the girl and say my sister wants me to get her twilight for her birthday but i refuse do you anything she might like instead.

>>2398753
>a poster on /lit/ giving girl advice

╔══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╗
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Repost this if ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ you are a beautiful strong black woman ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ who don’t need no man ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
╚══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╝

>>2398794

what if i'm a beautiful strong black man who needs a woman

>>2398788
Read the Bell Jar and make him suffer as much as you do.

>>2398799
you just need a knife and a hoodie

>>2398538
I'm all of those things too! Fuck yeah, I'm going to have fun with this.

I've never spoken to a chick in a bookstore...although I want to fairly badly. Most of them are too old / ugly, anyway. I once looked down a MILF's top for almost 10 minutes, while she crouched infront of me...completely oblivious (lulz). I think her cluelessness was the best part.

Like most people on /lit/, I've never 'just approached' a girl in such a place (except at parties, clubs, etc). People like that must be really confident.

>>2400061


Confident? for god's sake, what have you got to lose? get rejected or don't try. either way you go home alone. I defy ANYBODY to get a "no" six times in a row. Just keep trying, and be polite and low key.

wtf people dont like to be hit on in random public places. you are fucking creepy if you think its appropriate. its creepy enough at a bar or nightclub but people can put up with it if they are sufficiently drunk. in the absence of alcohol however, you need to find less contrived ways of making friends. join clubs, talk to your neighbours, or your classmates. make friends that way, ask them out, or they'll introduce you to more friends and you can ask them out. That's the way it's done. You don't ask random people out on dates like your on the set of some american sitcom. for fuck sake.

>>2400068
obviously projecting insecurities

>>2400068
> You don't ask random people out on dates like your on the set of some american sitcom. for fuck sake.

I lol'd.

>>2400068

get laid much? people come on to me in public a lot more than in private, friend-mediated situations, and I don't go to bars. I find it creepier when my sister's friends or my co-workers try to ask me out, or get me to ask them.

>>2400068

It's true. I've seen many dudes crash & burn asking girls out in public places. What are you, some walking groin? relax, man.

>>2398591
i was like "wtf is necronerd, deathnerd??" then i read the thread and was like oh "goth"
do people actually say necro nerd, is this a thing?

>>2400074
No. it's just that asking out random people at bus stops and bookshops isn't socially acceptable outside fictional dramatisations.

this is the method of pick up for people who are socially incompetent . you see it on tv and think, you should do it that way. In reality, people meet their spouses organically in day to day life, like at school or university, working or growing up beside each other. I would never be so foolhardy to say it doesn't happen but it's not likely that you meet people with nothing more than a spontaneous introduction and friendship proposal.

>>2400082
> get laid much?

Teenager detected.

>>2400082
Your thinking about the private, friend-mediated situations all the wrong way. when you already know someone, getting closer to them in a sexual or romantic way never comes from 'asking them out'. it just leads that way in incremental stages.

>>2400068
>>2400088
what you may not be understanding is that in situations where you go to that place commonly it becomes organic; if you see someone there 3 times you start to say hello and talk about things... sometimes it seems like the want to fuck; stranger things happen

>>2400088
you sound like you're suffering from some deep shame issues. i recommend you read "Healing the Toxic Shame that Binds You" by John Bradshaw. I am completely serious.

>>2400088
Most pick-up literature encourages approaching people during the day at places like the mall, the grocery store, etc.

I've been approached by girls at bookstores before. It's not terribly unusual. If the girl is in anyway creeped out by it (which she more than likely won't be) then you simply move on with your life and look for somebody else to talk to.

>>2400066
>>2400068

I don't know what to think!

>>2400094
well that proves my point. if you see someone in a cafe or shop you visit regularly then you would get to know each other. at first it would start with a 'hello' and a nod and conversation would progress from there. . im not saying you can't jump right into things. it dpends on how you come across which depends on how attractive and confident you are but typically, it would need to be slower. people just like to get on with their own thing when they are in public.

>>2400105
you're problem is that you're worrying about what the girl is thinking.

>>2400088

I agree with this. Good relationships are organic.

Of course, building it up slowly can lead to the Friend Zone, and then you're fucked. I mean, totally fucked. That's bad.

>>2400114
The concept of the "friend zone" is bullshit made for children to dwell on.

>>2400105
>>2400088
>>2400068
guys, I wrote all this and I took it from a previous thread on this exact subject. Funny thing is, in that thread, the consensus was that the point i am making is right. Shows you how diverse these forums are.

>>2400111
I care about what the person feels principally BECAUSE people don't like to be approached randomly in public. when someone goes out to a bookstore, they have one thing in mind - to buy a book or browse before going home or going off to do more shopping or wherever. they dont go to bookstore wanting to be approached by prospective partners. well everyone besides the socially isolated denizens of 4chan.

>>2400114
the 'friend zone' is a hollywood concept as well.

>>2400114
I think being fucked is the opposite of what happens in the friend-zone, actually.

>>2400123
>I care about what the person feels principally BECAUSE people don't like to be approached randomly in public. when someone goes out to a bookstore, they have one thing in mind - to buy a book...

I'm not sure where you're from, but this is pretty much the last reason why most people are hanging out at the corporate bookstores around here. It's very obvious that some people hang out in them in hopes of meeting people.

>>2400123
>I care about what the person feels principally BECAUSE people don't like to be approached randomly in public

well that's just like, you, man. the rest of us are comfortable in our own skin and can handle gracefully most situations with perfect strangers.

seriously, there are probably more girls who would LOVE to be approached in public than the other way around. and if they don't, so what, it doesn't hurt.

you look at everyone else in this thread as the problem, but like one who sees the thorn in his brother's eye and misses the log in his own, YOU are the problem.

>>2400132
you must live in hipsterville or else your perceptions are misguided . but you wouldn't have considered that.

>>2400088

You get a feel for what's appropriate. Meeting people in public places has worked a LOT better for me than either singles places or friend hookups. It doesn't even require a lot of suavity. just be yourself and be at ease. If anything, it's made fun of in sitcoms and movies. It actually is a lot less awkward and fail-prone than that

.>>2400087

necronerd is fannish.
goes back to the eighties, and includes goths, zombie fans, some punks. anybody in black who talks about suicide or death obsessively.

>>2400135
in private situations, you don't 'approach ' people in the manner you're thinking.

and yes, creepy whores want to be approach by equally creepy strangers. a match made in heaven <3

I'm not the problem, I'm being as conformist and conservative as possible

>>2400123

You're right. women hate to be approached in public. Which is why I follow them home and approach them on their doorsteps when it's private and their hands are full of surprisingly sharp keys.

Did i ever tell you how I got these scars?

>>2400148
yeah because the only alternative to the random approach is stalking, breaking and entering or rape. You must be stupid.

>>2400154

nah, I just think I'm funny.

>>2400145
>I'm being as conformist and conservative as possible
damnit, it was a troll thread all along

>>2400138
Yes, of course. One of those things MUST be true. Or, ya know, your spergy head is up your spergy ass and you haven't been able to deduce that Barnes and Noble has been the go-to suburban late night hang out since forever.

>>2400068
>>2400123
>>2400145
the technical term for this person by the way is "Stick in the mud"

>>2400138
man who the fuck goes to a bookstore to buy a book?
buying books is incidental now, if i wanted to just buy a book, i have amazon

>>2400145

Hey! I think I saw you! weren't you the one huddled in that corner of the Barnes & Noble cafe, back to the wall and holding up that copy of The Fountainhead like it was a crucifix made of garlic and you were the last virgin in a Hammer film?

I thought you were sort of cute in a Velma-sh way. The glint from your rape-whistle really set off your eyes...

>>2400162
>Or, ya know, your spergy head is up your spergy ass and you haven't been able to deduce that Barnes and Noble has been the go-to suburban late night hang out since forever.

Well it's not that so it's probably one of the other things.

>>2400183
people still buy books at bookstores, its still their primary function. they are not hang out spots. and even if they are, even if they have a cafe included, people are there to sit with friends they met organically, not people they meet in obtrusive forced contrived scenarios.

>>2400189

>>2400202

Stop saying "organically" it makes me think of tiny, overpriced tomatoes.

also, "obtrusive forced contrived scenarios" is another phrase for "relationships". defining one thing as natural and good, and another as unnatural and contrived just limits your options. Now, would you like to meet me on /b/ with a timestamp? leave the "fish needs a Bicycle" t-shirt here...

>>2400202
>mfw I realize I've been trolled.

>>2400202
listen man you're just fucking wrong
bookstores are now 90% about conspicuous leisure
amazon has free delivery and every book in the world
seriously, bookstore to buy books? retarded
where do you live, anyway

>>2400221
I called it contrived etc but I never said it couldn't be pulled off. as I said earlier, it does depend on the person and the scenario. but it's not typically the way things work and not particularly the way most people want it to work. thats why bookstores don't advertise: 'come in, read, meet the love of your life'. people go out in public to do particular things before disappearing into their own private world. the gap between those realms is called the process of friendship and usually it starts when two private realms overlap. usually they have to come together for an extended period of time. you can bring them together yourself and start the process in a shorter time frame but pople dont generally like that unless they are a) really slutty or b) you're movie star handsome.

>>2400234
a city. maybe the bookstore as a social gathering point is one the many eccentricities of your small town

>>2400246

being movie star handsome actually puts girls off. They get afraid to approach you, or tongue tied when you approach them. The ones who do approach often have some kind of ulterior motive, or, for some reason, REALLY specific requirements in what they consider an appropriate course for a relationship, which i find creepy in the extreme.

>>2400246
>>2400257
also, sluttiness is a great ice-breaker

>>2400246
i should have added, the people involved don't need to be slutty or cute, just desperate and lonely.

>>2400257
>being movie star handsome etc.
it's even less than that. girls are much less concerned about physical appearance. for guys attractiveness is 90% physical beauty. for girls its the other way around, it's only 10% how you look, the other 90% is a complex array of things, but boils down to 'alpha male'

>>2400246
>implying any place advertises itself as a place to meet partners.

Seriously, though, what rotted cove of cultural isolation do you reside in? Have you ever been out of the countryside? Are you a redneck?

If you've never had a conversation with a random or flirted with a cute girl/guy at a bookstore/any store, I feel bad for you son. The rest of the socialites and I will continue not to give a fuck and talk to people if we feel like it.

>>2400270
It's likely more than 10% physical appearance, but I agree in general.

>>2400271
I never said flirting and conversation don't happen at bookstores. I said people dont go there for that. unless you are creepy and desperately lonely like the people ITT. the conversation and flirting happens with some sort of social catalyst like when you make you purchase and approach the checkout girl, or someone asks another person where they can find such and such an author. Without the social catalyst, it's a girl standing next to a bookshelf and some guy leering over her.

>>2400270

kind of a myth. sure confidence is much more important and attractive for women, but to suggest they don't care about physical attractiveness, or just care much less, is to get things completely wrong.

because in actuality it's simply that women have completely idiosyncratic (and often to our eyes completely retarded) opinions of what is attractive. they rarely agree on what is hot in a guy, while for men it's been proven there's a pretty narrow range of what's considered attractive with much agreement between them

>>2400291
>kind of a myth

exactly, the kind of people who think its okay to approach other randomly are the same who believe stupid myths about the opposite sex. myths perpetuated by internet conversations - the only social interaction these people have

>>2400297
But if approaching randoms works for some people, why is it so terrible?

I mean, I'm assuming it works for SOMEBODY given all of the pick-up literature that encourages approaching randoms.

>>2400252
ur town is small as fuck compared to my small town
suck my dick
peace

That's just published because it sells. lonely desperate people are buying it. not because it works. they try it out and elicit nothing but a laugh, then they go home and talk to their friends online, some of which are female, some of which are single and the never think to ask them out because the tv has taught them that the proper way to find a girlfriend is to approach strangers.

>>2400307
That's just published because it sells. lonely desperate people are buying it. not because it works. they try it out and elicit nothing but a laugh, then they go home and talk to their friends online, some of which are female, some of which are single and the never think to ask them out because the tv has taught them that the proper way to find a girlfriend is to approach strangers.

>>2400345
uh, if tv can convince people that approaching randoms is okay then it would likely also convince people that being approached by randoms is okay.

lol @ people ITT.

>implying people go out in nice clothes/nice haircuts/nails done in order to NOT get any attention paid to them.

a fundamental lack of understanding that humans, male and female, primarily want to fuck ITT.

>>2400345
well it's certainly not unacceptable.

>implying women care anything about male physical 'attractiveness
>implying males can even BE 'physically attractive'
>implying you're not all raging homosexuals

lit, i seriously hope you guys don't do this

>>2400646

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dabBHJijMX4

>>2400390
thats just a useless moral argument. im not even contemplating that.

>herp derp attractive women only go for good looking guys derp herp

>>2400670
its funny because its probably heterosexual guys who say women don't care about a guys appearance. their evidence is that beautiful women pair up with unattractive males. but with them being heterosexual they have an obvious bias - the woman will always be attractive and the man will always be unattractive to them.

Shit just got real.

This thread is dividing into two opposing factions, both of which are adamant they are right. TBQH, I don't know which is.

>>2400692
your confusing nonsensical argument and rambling gibberish aside... woman are physically attracted to male features, there is no doubt of that. a triangular shaped upper body, sinewy arms, thick neck, tall and erect posture. and we know that people find attractive faces with continuity or symmetry or whatever the studies have found. but it is FAR less important for a woman than it is for a man, almost marginal even. women are attracted to a man's persona, men are attracted to a woman's body. it's actual really awsome for us guys when you think about it, we are not constrained by genetics. and i've been saging this thread from the beginning, just so you know, i don't wish to discuss this stuff with people who don't want to know, because the result is well evident here. '>retard social engineering you just have to be nice duh be yourself hurr durr' and so on. just not worth discussing with closed minds, so, sage.

It's time for a library pick up story.


Petite girl at catalogue computer. I go up to her real close, I'm annoyed.

'do you want to use this?'. She asks
'yeah.'
She let's me use it.

Later, she's at a different catalogue computer. And I do the same thing, and the same thing happens.

Later still, shes at another computer and I go up to her and say 'i want to use this one now.... Just kidding.' Then slunk off.

Ok, so I don't know what to do at this stage but somehow, against every grain of my being I start looking for her again. Can't find her.

Finally find her reading.

'i thought Id lost you.'. I say.
Smiles.
Do you want to go for a coffee? I say
'no'. She says,
Why not?
Pause
I don't know you,' she says.
I say, 'yeah, that's the point of getting a coffee, so you get to know someone.'
She shakes her head no.
Why don't you ask me a question. You're over 18 right?
Yeah

Blah blah.. anyway, end up going out with her a few times. Did not fuck her though, she was a virgin, the timing was all off, and I didn't read her right. I gave up in the end.

Tl;dr. Picking up a girl at the libary is easy, even if you do everything totally wrong.

>>2400718

>mfw you write a greentext story without...green text
>mfw I have no face

and the thing you have going for you in the random pick up:

- and is actually an advantage and does not work outside of the random pick up

is that by the act in itself of you going up to a stranger tells the girl that you have had successful encounters this way in the past, so you've already presented yourself as having been socially successful in the past, just even in as little as saying 'Hello' to someone you've never met.

╔══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╗
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Repost this if ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ you are a beautiful strong anon ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ who don’t need no trip ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
╚══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ══════════════╝

>>2400850

Shit, man, you never go full negro.

Browsing

There's a pretty bookshop
In the mall where I stop
of an evening to bask in the glow.
of keats and Jerome,
before toddling home
i might linger an hour or so

It's a pleasantish place
and they fill up the space
in the front with a smallish cafe
and sometimes, i confess,
if the hours do not press
i might hang about most of a day

I'm not on intimate terms,
with my fellow bookworms
and wont let myself tax them unduly
still perhaps its unkind,
but when they bring to mind
certain authors, i christin them newly

On a day I won't state
I'd stopped in for a plate
of buscuits and perhaps a small chai
when the svelte sillhouette
of a winsome Collette,
with a volume of Proust caught my eye

She'd been snagged by a stripling
not unlike a young kipling
who held her attention , and arm
I began to suspect
that the virtues of Hecht
werent the ones he pursued with his charm

then I chanced to glance round,
drawn perhaps by the sound,
of Seneca, muttering in Greek
and I beheld not a few
folk arrayed two and two,
intermixed in amongst the more meek

A saturnine Poe,
with a pert Woolf in tow,
was pretending to parse Kierkigaard,
While a stately Ayn Rand,
With Anne Rice, hand in hand
was affecting amused disregard
an assertivre Camus
had assembled a crew,
of pale Kafkas, and one hapless Twain
In a booth by the door
where he regaled the floor
with contradictions implicit in Paine

till a black-clad Millay,
did a studied sashay
through his prospect,
and made the lad stammer,
and throw up his tirade,
as though she had laid
him across the forehead with a hammer

>>2400918

I had seen quite enough
of this singles-night stuff,
so I made deft repair to the stacks
where the used classics rest
side by side with the best
of the second hand trade paperbacks.

By a Disneyfied "Alice"
I picked out a "Valis"
and "Melmoth Reconciled" bound in calf.
to go home and unwind
with this fortunate find
was my thought, when I heard a quiet laugh

i beheld two thin chaps,
quite in each other's laps,
with expressions that brought to mind Wilde
clandestinely thumbing
a volume of cummings,
best works, with the joy of a child
I detoured through suspense
so to raise up a fence
of fiction betwixt me and them
When I got quite a shock
passing Iris Murdoch
and I felt myself out on a limb

There was Samdburg himself,
hair mussed up like an elf
out of tolkien, chatting up Jane
Austen, she preened and laughed
while they spoke of Lovecraft,
but escape was what I wished to gain

>>2400921


the poetry section,
i thought, on reflection,
I'll certainly find respite there!
No! A Pince-nezzed Stout,
had his Longfellow out,
and was bending Le Guin crost a chair!
And a youthful Stendahl
had an Atwood asprawl
with her Brontes spread open before.
I spun round, so to flee,
but then what should I see,
but a shy little Oates by the door!

My tongue grew quite thick,
as she reached for my Dick,
and soon cradled my Balzac as well.
"Why such treasures your finding!
I've always thought binding
with leather was awfully swell!"

The whole thing turned out good,
when I quite understood,
and we afterwards went out a pair.
And we went to my den,
where we essayed anais nin
on the sofa bed next to the stair.

Now I'm straight home of nights
and I eschew the the lights
of the quiant little shop, without sigh.
for she's bought me a Nook,
and declared that a book
store's not for married men, such as I.

>>2400918

Holy shit! is this original?

>>2400950
why wouldn't it be?

>>2400964

well, it's awfully fucking LONG, for one thing. Who writes shit like this? It must have taken hours.
Did you write it?

>>2400964
Not bad. You the same one that posted the satirical poems last week?

this got me. Sneaky.

>My tongue grew quite thick,
as she reached for my Dick,
and soon cradled my Balzac as well.

never browsed /lit/ before

came for the talks about literature, stayed for the debates about what men and women find attractive in one another

just kidding. kill yourselves.

>>2400918
Excellent effort.

Are you mocking people who pick up others in a bookstore/library or applauding them though?

Still, it's OC. and gets my applause.

>>2400964

out of curiosity, how long did you take with this? It's pretty good, but sort of rushed feeling.

>>2401031
haha

Quite possible. You leer over them until they notice you. You talk to them. You make sure youre not masturbating while this happens

>>2400711

i think the different approaches reflect different personality types.

>>2401099
i didn't write it, but i did ask why someone would think it wasn't original.

i don't know if it was original, but it wouldn't surprise me if it was.

>>2401572
it seems so because there are spelling errors, typos

>>2401611
More like,
it seems so because it mentions authors that /lit/ whores all over
>ftfy

You're in the bookstore to buy books. If you talk to me in the bookstore, you had better be talking about books. If you are talking about books, it had better be immediately relevant, not like: "Yo babe, you read Moby Dick?"
Instead, try:
"Oh, I see you're looking at A Year in the Village of Eternity. That's got lots of great stuff in it. Are you a real big fan of Italian cooking?"

If you do not meet either requirement, I WILL tell you to fuck off. Nothing personal, I'm just bothered by people who talk about random shit in a bookstore

>>2401658
A girl actually reading Moby Dick would be the easiest pickup up the century...

Hey babe, wanna suck my 'moby dick', if you know what I mean?

>>2401658
>I WILL tell you to fuck off.

No, you'll likely mumble something awkwardly, laugh nervously, and later on write an angry editorial about it in your student paper.

>>2398729
Watch you got against /fit/ you four eyed geek motherfucker? Buff guys can read and write!

>>2401673
No, no, I'm very belligerent.

just go up and say

"hey I just had to meet you I think you're cute, I'm Anon"

if shes around your age she'll get it. ask if shes in school and go from there. if anything you'll get an instant date for coffee. in b4 you got mail.

if not you got a solid number. shes prob a nerd and will be taken aback. don't approach the weird ones.

>>2401683
Are you a male? Than you need not worry about anyone approaching you, and you would sooner shag your own mother than tell a girl to fuck off.

Are you a female? Than this is even more hilarious, you, a timid little creature telling a man to fuck off. HA

Approaching people in public places is good for friendships, but I don't know about relationships... but then again I'm pretty shy so I don't usually make strong connections with people outside of my circle. I did talk to this one guy in the library this summer who started rapping and beatboxing quietly as he was walking around the shelves and I was smiling and laughing at him and so we talked for a while about music and books and college (he had been a junior but dropped out for lack of funds and was working on environmental projects of some sort... he looked more than a little homeless though). He wanted to go to a reggae concert with me, but I was kind of sketched out because he said he smoked a lot of pot and I'm not really into that. Didn't really help that he was black and not well-kempt at all (not trying to be racist, but it's hard not to be scared 'cause he was tall and did drugs and I'm about five feet and 90 pounds, so I gotta watch out). I dunno, maybe it would have expanded my social life to go with him, but fear/self-preservation got the better of me. We're still on pretty good terms though, and talk whenever I see him around town.

>>2401815
so you are a white woman
and you are talking to niggers?

and the fucking liberals come along and blather about how bad segregation was... fucking disgusting.

I think we should execute liberals for treachery and gas the kikes too.

>>2401819
FUCK YOU, I'm also Jewish.

>>2401823
>I'm rebelling against my parents by associating with drug dealing criminal niggers

Please make long blow posts about the troubles you run into(rape,theft, drug addiction, etc)
I'll be very interested

>>2401819

>>2401829
blog*
whoops

>>2401823

>>2401815
>five feet
You will never be of value to anyone

>>2401842
i think its a woman

>>2401844
Don't think a guy would be 90 pounds and 5 feet tall, but if it is wow.

Also too late on not replying to that one post, but just don't do it again.

>>2401815

One thing to add -- creepiness is more based on how you act than appearance. I was way less creeped out by the creepier looking guy that acted nice in the library than the geeky white guy I met who was working at a B&N in my hometown. I was buying a book about writing, so he asked what kind of stuff I like to write, and I said I was working on a scifi story. Then he kind of just followed me around awkwardly stalking me for the rest of the time until I decided to leave. Never wanted to come back to that store. (ironic thing is that I found out that guy was a good friend of one of my friends from high school... weird.)

>>2401849
>woman
>jew

I believe you meant to say that you are writing ROMANCE placed on the background of some sci-fi.

>>2401849
Makes sense. I am awfully paranoid and think things way too into detail and often find myself coming back from my daze and realize I am doing something creepy.

Doesn't help that I am introverted, barely talk to people that aren't in my circle, and that I may have depression.

>>2400123
>when someone goes out to a bookstore, they have one thing in mind - to buy a book or browse before going home or going off to do more shopping or wherever.

>>2400138 - responding to a rebuttal to the above
you must live in hipsterville or else your perceptions are misguided

Tone down the autism, bro. People may not go to the bookstore with the express intent of meeting people, but they're open to the idea. They go there to kill time, grab a coffee, shop around, doing the same kind of shit they'd be doing at home, essentially (sans the fapping)—only in public. The possibility of meeting others does contribute to the draw of getting out of the house, for a lot of people.

>>2401858
Are you me? I have zero self awareness sometimes. I'll just zone out and then come back and think "Jeese, I hope I didn't look stupid just now." Not to mention my circle of friends are either in other cities or I rarely talk to them. I also think I have depression. Oh well.

>>2401849
>the creepier looking guy that acted nice in the library
can you describe this anon in some detail? like, what was it about him that put you at ease?

when i do fall into talking to people in public, especially women, i'm taciturn almost to the point of being a bit unfriendly, because I don't want anyone to feel as though I'm cornering them into a conversation they'd rather not have, a la that B&N guy you mentioned. the problem is that i'll realize (always right afterwards) that they seemed a lot more open to conversation than my stupid insecurities had led me to believe (i have such shit thinking, on-the-spot, with make-or-break social shit like that), and i'd actually ended the conversation a bit prematurely, before it had really reached a natural conclusion.

that said, i don't know what the benefit of a "natural conclusion" would be. i don't want to be "that guy" and ask them their number, as though it's my reward for conducting a natural, non-awkward conversation. people should just be able to converse, without having to operate on assumptions that both parties are acting to subvert the other's attempts at eliciting a phone number (him) or withholding a phone number (her). but at the same time, it i don't make any effort toward keeping in touch, the conversation seems almost a bit pointless.

>>2401904
I'm the same girl from >>2401815. I think I just got the vibe that he was in a really good mood from the way he was beatboxing earlier. Maybe humming a little or singing quietly would set people at ease? It might help you relax a little bit, at least. Also, a lot of it is chance -- he happened to mention a lot of things that I was interested in while we were talking, like the farmer's market I had just come from. Just keep the conversation on simple, everyday things. Mundane stuff is sometimes the best to bond over (it lets the other person know you're "normal"). Makes for a good foundation for later conversations. Also, breathing deep while the other person is talking (4 seconds in, hold 6, exhale 8) will help you relax if you feel yourself starting to get nervous. I tend to forget to breathe if I meet someone I really like who's intimidating, so this usually helps.

If you're town's relatively small and the person frequently goes to that bookstore or library, there's a good chance you'll find them again. Asking for numbers/email always seems creepy -- there's no way to get around that. Aim to ask for contact info the third time -- she'll probably be comfortable with you by them, but not have friendzoned you just yet.

the fuck is this?
soc?
go somewhere else

>>2401904
>>make or break

There is nothing social-related that deserves this level of drama. No matter how many people you absolutely blow it with, there are always more people. Re-fuckin'-lax.

I would absolutely love it if someone flirted with me at a bookstore, it would be as simple as them saying "Hey." and seeing where things went from there. Being in a bookstore, talking about books often helps too...

I would imagine the conversation going the same way it would whenever I have ever talked about music with a girl.
She'll say something she likes, in my head I'll have a sperg attack because it's some entry level pleb shit and I'm a judgmental asshole. I'll immediately think myself culturally superior to her and regard her on an inferior plane of intelligence. Then, for the rest of the time while I try my best to be nice I'll realize that we have such discordant tastes we will never click on the level that I dream of someday connecting with someone. Wherever the conversation/friendship goes from there, she'll be grouped into one of the many people who have alienation me because I'm a cold, distant person even though I have a deep seeded longing for human interaction and just want to connect with someone.
high possibility of killing myself

>>2402047
meanwhile she chuckles in her head at your endearing eggcorn, reflecting on how you substitute pseudointellectualism and pitchfork magazine for a proper education

no. mostly idiots and assholes go to my library.

>>2402058
Too bad I don't read pitchfork and I'm not substituting anything for a 'real' education because I go to college, faggot

ITT:

>“Like a bicycle, like a wheel that, once rolling, is >stable only so long as it keeps moving but falls when >its momentum stops, so the game between a man >and woman, once begun, can exist only so long as it >progresses. If the forward movement today is no >more than it was yesterday, the game is over.”
>Solzhenitsyn

>>2402047

You have a choice:

1. keep looking for a girl that meets your expectations, meet as many people as you possibly can in quick succession until you eventually find that person.

2. lower your standards, stop being an egotistical prick, and maybe have more fun.

Or you can take the slimy base creature way out and kill yourself. But it won't make you a man.

ITT:

“Like a bicycle, like a wheel that, once rolling, is stable only so long as it keeps moving but falls when its momentum stops, so the game between a man and woman, once begun, can exist only so long as it progresses. If the forward movement today is no more than it was yesterday, the game is over.”
>Solzhenitsyn

>>2402068
clear the way people, this guy goes to college, let's give his towering intellect some room here

>>2402080
1) I'm socially crippled, I don't talk to anyone, ever.

2) I adjust my standards to the point of almost not having standards when I'm actually going through the motions of meeting someone, just to get the ball rolling

So ya, probably end up a slimy, base creature. I'm just concerned my family will be all cry-y and shit. Don't really want to hurt them, so I haven't done it yet

>>2402068
Not even the guy you're responding to, but please, I go to a University (one of the top in the world too), come back when you go to University and not some little boys' "college".

>>2402098
0/10

>>2400099
>Healing the Toxic Shame that Binds You" by John Bradshaw
Anon, you literally made me realize I have some serious issues to deal with. Thank you.

>mfw I only go to a hole in the wall bookstore that doesn't advertise and is small as shit

Haven't seen any females go in here, ever really. Libraries I go to would be the central library that is filled with bums and the library at school that I only go to, to be alone. Feels alright really, don't really need flirting and I'm ok being alone. never have had a girlfriend, so yeah

>>2398502
>in bookstore
>looking at the fiction section
>girl wearing a texas is the reason t-shirt reaches for some Pynchon
>say that the Crying of Lot 49 is a great books
>make small talk about books
>mention I like Texas is the Reason
>She says 'oh' disappointedly and makes excuses she's got to go meet friends.

I don't even....

>THE YEAR IS TWOTHOUSAND SEVEN.
>I AM SEVENTEEN YEARS OF AGE.
>I ENTER A BOOKSTORE, NOT LOOKING FOR A BOOK IN PARTICULAR.
>MY GLANCE MEETS WITH THE FEMALE CLERK'S GLANCE, AND INFERING FROM HER FACIAL EXPRESSION, SHE SEEMS "ATTARACTED TO ME".
>THE FEMALE CLERK IS APPROXIMATELY ONE METER SIXTY CENTIMETERS TALL, BLACK HAIR ARRANGED IN A "BUN", AND HER SKIN IS PALE WHITE WITH FRECKLES SPECKLED OVER HER CHEEKS & NOSE.
>SHE ASKS ME IF I NEED SOMETHING IN PARTICULAR.
>I LOOK TO MY RIGHT SIDE, TRYING TO THINK SOMETHING TO REPLY.
>I FEEL HER STARE AND I GET OVERLY ANXIOUS.
>I SAY "NO".
>HER FACIAL EXPRESSION BECOMES "BLANK", AS IF SHE WAS "SUDDENLY DISAPPOINTED".
>I WALK AWAY OUT OF THE BOOKSTORE IN SHAME.
>THAT WAS NOT THE FIRST SPACETIME THAT I HAVE BEEN IN THAT KIND OF SITUATION WHEN A GIRL APPROACHES ME WITH A "STOCK QUESTION", JUST TO ENGAGE IN CONVERSATION WITH ME, AND I GET OVERLY ANXIOUS, "THWARTING" HER APPROACH WITH A "SHARP ANSWER", WALKING AWAY.

>>2400918

This is excellent. I like the way it ties the main dispute in the first part of this thread together, I like the set up and the references, and even the style.

I notice you mostly use archaic constructions when you need to force the scansion, which is a schoolboy trick, but better writers have used it before.

I do sort of wonder why you would do this? This isn't the sort of board where this kind of effort is generally appreciated.

Plus it will vanish when the thread 404s and you're not likely to need it again...

I met my ex in a bookstore.

I was recommending books to my friend and mentioned Three Men in a Boat and she was behind me and said "to say nothing of the dog".

we hit it off immediately.

>>2402161
>17 year old
>very likely clerk is older than 17
no, she wasn't hitting on you faggot, she was asking the stock question they ask to everyone

>>2403041

YOU DO NOT KNOW.

>>2402161

>AND INFERING FROM HER FACIAL EXPRESSION, SHE SEEMS "ATTARACTED TO ME".

IT'S CALLED CUSTOMER SERVICE, NOT "ATTARACTION", CHAMP

guys how do i gf

>>2403058
Hipster pizza.

>>2403058

Is that mountain dew?

>>2403058
is that a giant smartie cookie?

>>2403058
Truman is poor. That's disappointing. If you're going to be a douchey, self-important, and grandiose e-faggot you can't be poor, ugly and common. Step it up, Truman

>>2403058
Idk, what are you like?

>>2403066
it's mattoni lemon flavoured mineral water
>>2404071
it's pizza
>>2403078
not poor, just lazy

>>2401815
>he said he smoked a lot of pot and I'm not really into that
>but it's hard not to be scared 'cause he was tall and did drugs and I'm about five feet and 90 pounds, so I gotta watch out
subtle racist detected. I bet you don't find tall white stoners intimidating.
pic related

>>2403058
You gotta come out with me bro. I'll hook you up with mad hipster girls who will love you, then leave you, but you will have confidence and probably have dicked their friends by then.

Come on bro. We'll smash Scotland up.

>>2403117

okey

>>2403117
Go die, you fucking subhuman trash.

>>2403079

truman looks like a little girl

>>2402161
>"THE YEAR IS TWOTHOUSAND SEVEN."

I really enjoyed this for some reason.

>>2403136
What's your damage bro?
Mad jelly I have fucked over 100 girls?
You can come out too. It's an open invitation.

>>2403137
:3

>>2403148
That's not truman

is it?

>>2403156
yes. he was on cam a few times before /lit/club broke up.

>>2403162
whats /lit/club?

>>2403162
I want to have sex with his cute little bottom.

>>2403176

/lit/'s old chatroom on tinychat before it collapsed after brownbear and tomharper topped themselves.

>>2403162
litclub is still around.

>>2403079
you're pretty

>>2403183
a husk.

>>2403079

>PERSONS BELIEVING THAT THAT PERSON IN THE PHOTOGRAPH IS "Truman Capote".

THAT IS A TRANSVESTITE TEENAGE BOY THAT IS POPULAR AMONGST PERSONS FROM /soc/, AND /b/.

This thread is still going? 200+ posts? This is one of the biggest threads I've ever seen on /lit/. I admit, it's a very good one.

>>2403197

i think his/her name is 'rose', and i'm pretty sure s/he's transgender.

>>2403218
wait, the chick with blonde hair is a transvestite?

>>2403226

yep, his real name is brian or something.

>>2403230
>>2403218
>pretty sure
>i think
>or something

Bitch, you ain't fooling nobody. You know everything there is to know about this crossdresser.

>>2403230
>>2403226
>>2403218
>>2403197

Rose isn't a trap.

>>2403256
>Rose isn't a trap.
hahahahahaahahaha

>>2403256

THAT IS ACCURATE, IT IS JUST A TRANSVESTITE.

is there a definitive memoir by a transvestite? like focus on before/after comparisons?

>>2403270
>>2403278

Nope. Lurk more.

>>2403298
rose is a fucking tranny, YOU lurk more

>>2403298

>that denial

>>2403283

Max Valerio, "The Testosterone Files"

>and the word you were looking for was "transsexual"

>>2403305
thank you xx :]

>>2403299

Prove it or get the fuck out.

If it's that pic of some random guy who looks like Rose wearing a backpack on the street in a blue shirt you can fuck off.

I've seen childhood pictures of Rose (procured by her stalker) and it's clear that she's female.

stop derailing the thread with your shit

>people still think rose is a boy
>hfw

She just pretends to be a boy as a new way to attention whore.

>>2403317
Post em.

bump for tips

>>2403406
she is a tranny this is a fact.
people PRETEND that she is a girl for trolling purposes.

>>2404066
I demand proof!

>>2403406
The joke flew over your head so high, it left a chemtrail made of broken dreams and unresolved promises.

>>2404091
this makes no sense

Well. It's Valentine's day, so I'm off to the bookstore to hang around the literature section, waiting for lonely English majors. Wish me luck!

>>2404370
It'll all be fat old librarians. If you're lucky, maybe a proto old fat librarians.

>>2404373
I'm so alright with that.

>>2404066

Double troll I see you. You would know she is female if you've seen a single one of her videos (unless you're autistic and can't pick up on small communicative details)

>>2403283
Nina Arsenault's "The Silicone Diaries"
I have a feeling the final version is not out yet, though. It's been published as a play, but I believe Nina is still working on her memoirs. I've read several articles by her and found her writing to be quite interesting. She's a fascinating character.