/lit/ - Literature

Why haven’t you guys just written like 30 short stories and linked the other books in the backmatter and retired already? It’s not hard.
You complain a lot but do little, like women.

What does it say about me if I enjoy writing female protagonist more than men? It's just kinda gay imagining some guy moving around in my head all the time. And no I'm not a tranny, I hate them

>>22802525
Based if they are cute and hot, cringe if they are just gender swapped

>>22802533
Cringe then. My female protags are generally autistic

>>22802525
It’s good bro nothing wrong with it. Haven’t you read james?

why would anyone want to write in english? it's ugly and poor

>>22802498
No one liked my short stories. Guess I will stick to novels.

>>22802611
Writing in English fucking enrages me due to how retarded the language is.

It's immensely complex with the little shitty rules that shouldn't matter, like "the" and "a" and "an" padding every single fucking sentence like crazy.

Yet when you actually get to writing, you'll find that your native tongue most likely handles what you are trying to write much, much better. I very often look up words trying to find a better translation from my own language, only to find out that the example word in English I have in my head is THE ONLY word they have for what I'm thinking of.

Fucking ridiculous. You faggot anglos should have focused on expanding your vocabulary for concepts instead of the putting the the front the front the of the every the sentence. The.

>>22802887
You can avoid that but it will sound archaic and unnatural to the modern reader and will invariably be labelled as “purple prose”. The current trend in English writing is towards simplicity and not poetry or ornateness. Mainly due to the fact that audiobooks have largely replaced reading and books need to be dumbed down to reach a larger audience. Writing advice such as “don’t use adverbs” and “show don’t tell” are also culprits. English positioned itself as the language of science and learning to great detriment to its literary canon. The best writers of English such as Shakespeare used an inordinate amount of Latin and French derived words.

>>22802611
>>22802887
Why do you continue to speak it? We'd be just as happy if ESLs ceased speaking English, ceased writing English books with chatgpt, ceased making this website garbage., etc. etc.
>focused on expanding your vocabulary for concepts
English has the largest vocabulary of any language.

>>22802887
This just means you dont like english because youre bad at it, retard.

>>22802611
>>22802887
Lol, I can only write in english now, exactly because of how much harder it is. I went from "this is shit" reaction to "i like some of it" according to anons' critique. While I could already write as good as any modern writer in my native tongue. If you analyze prose hard enough you'll see that english is actually much more artistic and poetic than any language that has simpler and more concrete way of communicating thoughts.

>>22802887
Then write in your irrelevant slav or sea nigger language

>>22802952
>Mainly due to the fact that audiobooks have largely replaced reading and books need to be dumbed down to reach a larger audience.
That's because of ESLs as English is he global language, there's no increase in "reading" due to the presence of audiobooks.

>>22802887
>expanding your vocabulary
We have the most bloated dictionaries on Earth. The British picked up new words like a lint roller.

>>22802887
>like "the" and "a" and "an" padding every single fucking sentence like crazy
To be fair, this is what happens with basically every language that uses articles instead of cases.

Any of you lads using mythology, history, or folklore as an influence for your writing? Mine seems to be heavily influenced by Grendel and Grendel's mother with a little mixture of Sawney Bean thrown in. I'm also thinking of splitting my long short story or novella into two parts one about the monster and her daily life, the other from the perspective of the town's people who eventually rally a posse together to go and kill it after she steals and eats a bunch of them.

>>22803476
I found it helpful to associate characters and elements of worldbuilding with mythology. Even the protagonist of one of my scrapped stories. I haven't based him on anything, haven't had a similar theme for the story, but I decided to think of him as one of the draugr and it helped to gain depth.

Where/what do you use to write?
Typewriter?
Physical word processor?
A computer program? (which one?)
Hand written?
Voice recordings?

>>22803476
Anglo witchlore and Appalachian folktales. Sometimes tales from the near east and african diaspora. I like heterodox and syncretic praxis and a good underdog story.

>>22802763
Do people like your novels?

>>22803529
Typically, MS Word. I do have a pen and 3-ring-binder right here too. I drafted a lot of short-stories on pen and paper, having coffee out on the front porch.

>>22803706
I've thought about using Word but I don't have the money for it, and also I'm worried about my computer suddenly dying and there being no backup.

The only other option is like Google but its word processor sucks.

>>22803767
Wait until you learn about libreoffice and free automatic cloud backups.

>>22803767
>>22803815
yea seriously are you fucking joking? Install Libreoffice and sync a folder to dropbox or mega or whatever and be done with it.

I was going through chapters of my latest novel and I ended up digging up a "story" I wrote like 6 years ago when I was 17. Enjoy (if possible):

The tall, brick building at the other side of the port blocked the moonlight and cast a big shadow upon Devon, who had been waiting for half an hour at the docks. The only sounds he’d been hearing by then were the distant squeaks of rats and the night waves sieging the hulls of the anchored ships.
He almost fell on a snooze before he saw an emerging silhouette crawling towards him from the other side of the street. Short man, oily hair, crooked nose and a cautious stride. That’s how Theo had described this man to him. As the figure got closer, Devon remained still as a statue, with his arms crossed near his torso.
When the man got close enough, he removed his hood. He was as though Theo had described him, although his head was shaved and his unkempt beard and black circles around his eyes made him look older than expect.
“I’m looking for passage to Sentinel. My wife is sick, and I’m in dire need of medicine,” said the man, as if he was trying to recite a poorly-remembered poem. A sensation of relief took over Devon. "Good. At least he knows the words."
“You were late” was the only thing Devon said as he turned his back to him and headed to the deck. “I was not” the man talked back. “You picked a bad time to meet, I tell ya. I could spy at least ten seamen up on the deck. Gossip flies fast in this city, so I revealed myself when circumstances best allowed for it,” he continued.
Cautious indeed. Devon stopped when he reached the side of the Black Moth and gave the man an unflinching stare. “I admire your caution, but your delay put us thirty minutes behind schedule. The men that you spotted were our spies, like everyone else at this port tonight.” he said as he reached for his pockets and grabbed a coin made out of ivory.
Devon walked up to the vessel and gave a loud whistle. Quickly, crewmembers stormed out and greeted them with as much enthusiasm as they could muster. None of them have closed an eye yet, Devon thought. The captain was the last man to welcome them. Standing at almost 2 meters, his hair had started falling and his beard graying, but his body did not show any signs of decaying. The valiant Captain Wormack had been a friend of the Order for almost twenty years by this point, and Devon trusted him more than he trusted his own sword hand.
Once the captain showed them to their cabins and their belongings, they were left alone. “You must be Devon,” said the man who was getting rid of the rags he was dressed in. Devon couldn’t help but hide his quirky smile. “That's the name I go by, yes.” He said as he examined a bottle of white wine that was left on the sheets of holland. “Our common acquaintance didn’t find it wise to tell me your name, though.”

>>22802961
Korean and Japanese has ten times the words of English, and Greek has even more. You sound like an American halfwit with gurgling down soda as his only hobby.

>>22803700
I hope so.

>>22803838
Better than what I would have written at 17, definitely.

>>22802961
>"English has the largest vocabulary of any language"
>argle, nargle, bargle, kargle, dargle, largle, ergle, nergle, bergle, kergle, dergle, lergle...
how can a language sound this bad?

>>22804013
>He rests. He has travelled. With? Sinbad the Sailor and Tinbad the Tailor and Jinbad the Jailer and Whinbad the Whaler and Ninbad the Nailer and Finbad the Failer and Binbad the Bailer and Pinbad the Pailer and Minbad the Mailer and Hinbad the Hailer and Rinbad the Railer and Dinbad the Kailer and Vinbad the Quailer and Linbad the Yailer and Xinbad the Phthailer.
Filtered.

>>22803476
I'm a hack that loves mythology and especially Jap mythology. One of the things I'm going to write is basically one big Jap myth circlejerk.

>>22802525
>And no I'm not a tranny, I hate them
Self-hatred is one of the main traits of trannies

What are your go-to dictionaries? I'm also partial to Ambrose Bierce.

I feel so guilty. My friend is a writer, and he keeps telling me about his stories, so I help him polish his stuff. I also have some writing pretensions, but my heart is just not into it even when my brain is. So I come up with an idea, we spend three hours talking about that, and then as soon as we are done I realise I'm so exhausted from discussing it that I no longer even want to write it. Feels like I am just wasting my friend's time. And the story I came up with isn't even bad, on the contrary, I like it. Just not enough to write it. Life sucks.

>>22804498
Good news, talking about writing isn't writing.

>>22804327
Wiktionary

I might be Vincent Van Goghing this shit but I'm sure as hell not Henry Dargering it

>>22804576
Having seen The Story of the Vivian Girls, in What Is Known as the Realms of the Unreal, of the Glandeco-Angelinian War Storm, Caused by the Child Slave Rebellion in person, you're coping because you don't have that kind of drive or output or belief in your work.

>>22804327
Samuel Johnson's Dictionary

>>22803815
>>22803837
What is the best free cloud backup option that won't just go POOF one day?

It's not what I usually write, but about an hour ago I sat down and wrote this opening paragraph of a romantic short story.

Like the Mona Lisa, she beamed on the congested Luas that grey day in November. With all the dramatics of baroque art, she sat with her legs crossed, smiling down into her phone. The light that was cast upon her cut shadows which were themselves masterpieces. Was he looking at a Caravaggio? She was fair in the Renaissance sense of the word and had he been able to stop time, to capture this image perfectly and permanently, he would stare at it and be absorbed in its beatific revelation until the end of it. If God created the whole world, this was why. Her golden hair flowed in locks wavy in thickness and her blue irises sparkled dazzlingly within the whites of her eyes. There seemed to be an electricity in them as they scanned the screen of her phone. The full, red lips which stretched into a broad handsome smile sparkled with a tastefully light amount of lip gloss. Her pale skin looked like marble. The Parthenon did envy. Be still my beating heart, he thought to himself. Hers was a beauty which ripped you away from all other distractions. It demanded to be seen, it liked to be admired, and it was self-evidently the work of a divine engineer. Or sculptor.

>>22804327
LA = Ale-8 Soda.

>>22804595
just get a flashdrive if you're so scared of your ogre creampai fanfic randomly "disappearing"

>>22804629
Flash has the worst record for fucking up, platters or NAND are the only halfway reliable options.

I refuse to write women into my stories. What a waste of words.

>>22804588
I don't get it. Are you trying to imply Gogh didn't have drive, output, or belief in his work?

>>22804691
There's only one fictional race in all my writings: honorable and virtuous women. Think the Illiad but with tits everywhere. I'm even planning to do away with men entirely in the future as my fictional women already serve their purposes

>>22804555

>>22804691
I like writing about women because I like exploring "the other."

right now I just feel like finishing this novel I've been working on for the past 2 years and then offing myself. The problem is that I still have another one I want to write after. I guess I'll follow this routine untill I run out of ideas - then I'll off myself.

>>22804716
I like exploring women. Mapping virgin territory. Planting my flag. Colonizing the natives. Plundering their resources.

>>22804737
That sucks. I have so many ideas I'll die naturally before I get through them all.

>>22804744

I'm writing a character with a Cantonese name. Which sounds better transliterated to English?

Death Burst (死綻), pronounced as Seizan
Murder Burst (殺綻), pronounced as Satzan

The Sei sounds the same as Say, and the Sat rhymes with butt or rut

I thought with Seizan it flows easier but I also sounds a bit Japanese which is not the intention.

>>22804846
Sei-zan or Sei Zan.

My writing feels too choppy and too straight forward. It needs more body and explanation but I don't know how to properly draw out the conversations.
Maybe you guys'll enjoy it, lemme know where to improve.

>>22804846
>tz
Do not ever, ever fucking do this in English.

Basically throwing a line to see if I get any hints:
Can anyone recommend any books or short stories where a murder/kidnapping happens in real time in the narrative.
I'm trying to write a disappearance/murder into a novel I'm trying to write. I haven't really decided how important this person and their murder will be, but I do know that the impact of the crime will linger in the small community for a few days (think Laura Palmer in Twin Peaks). I also know I shouldn't make the culprit wholly apparent but also make sure they're not invisible.
Any suggestions? Really, I just want an example of a crime novel/story where the crime is narrated in real time. Can be anything: books, television, movies.

>>22804976
Why? Don't you like pizza? Or mozzarella? Or Mozart? I'd understand if you don't like the tsetse fly. And although those words have foreign origins...so do many English words.

>>22804982
I think one of the best is definitely the murder scene in The Picture of Dorian Gray. Edgar Allan Poe has a lot of murder scenes, the best might be The Tell Tale Heart. In The Monk there are murders, a kidnapping and a rape. I can't remember many other kidnappings in fiction I've read.

>>22802621
I can't believe the OP image was deleted. What rule was broken by it? Or are 4channers just delicate snowflakes? Don't bother with Reddit...you need to decamp for Hello Kitty Island Adventure. (And it wasn't from /b/...it's a Florida mugshot.)

>>22805018
No ugliness in art threads

>>22805052
>he hasn't grown to see the beauty in ugliness
smdh

>>22805018
>>22805068
You are just a disgusting retard, brother. I am hiding your posts.
Peace from Londinium.

How do you guys view prologues and epilogues?

>>22805165
Prologues are useful if you want to start your story deceptively and unfold many surprises for the reader. They give out the general theme and it is exactly what you need sometimes. Epilogues are a requirment, blueballing the reader is the worst advice.

I'm trying to write litrpg but the idea I came up with is always better done without all the gamelit shit. It's like having a whole world of possible explanations for magic and abilities and events dumbed down to autistic number system and "skills". It's so fucking stupid. How can anyone tolerate this shit? What exactly do people see in this genre that isn't better done in any other?

>>22805219
>What exactly do people see in this genre that isn't better done in any other?
A consistent, autistic dedication to 'getting stronger' and power progression. And it's not that LitRPG does that BEST, but that it's almost always present, and since that's what readers want, they read lots of LitRPG. It's very much a comfort food genre. It's not supposed to wow you.

STFU you stupid nigger

so im (trying) to write this story about a archetypical european medieval kingdom and i need a reason for it to be cursed during the narrative. however, i do not want it to be blamed on anything in particular, neither character or event. can you guys give me some inspiration on how i can do that?
basically, things are fine, and suddenly they are not, but i have any good ideas on how that will happen. i will probably write a witch into the story, but i dont wand her to just curse the land because she is evil, and i also dont want any characters to piss her off and get cursed. i want something that is more the fault of humanity as a whole, but also not something that will make people say "SEE?? THIS SYMBOLIZES *insert valid social problem*"

>>22805268
Just don't explain it and have people through the story make up their own explanations.

Intro scene to a novel. Crit me or just tell me what you think
https://pastebin.com/Ve0BghVx

>>22805293
You had such a good intro the first 5 lines or so, then you went to some office drama no one gives a fuck about.

Scrap the whole fucking thing except the intro and write out the story that intro deserves. This is the best advice you will hear in your entire life.

>>22805332
This is the shittiest advice.
>>22805293
That's okay, I like the personal and absurd. Might be boring with that start, but I have no idea where you are going with it. You should definitely change the "young man ... older one" line. Also if this is not yet finished and established, you should look at how the principal appeared too elaborate and condescending. He doesn't really talk like a principal to a professor, even while having the voice of a principal he talks more like an adult to a 5 year old. Too much explanation, seems like you didn't really get your mind into the situation this character is in.

>>22805332
It's an isekai anon, I wanted to establish the protagonist's pretentiousness before the isekai part.
>>22805351
The principal is meant to be an one off character, he's there to act as a worldly contrast to the brat of a main character whose antics he's sick of. So yeah he's meant to be condescending. But I see what you meant, he doesn't really speak like a wise and respectable old man deserving of his title. Maybe I can make him a bit less angry, I think?

>have the most profound epiphanies go through my head while im working
>want to write them out
>by the time i have free time i no longer member most of it

how do i fix this?

>Characters that actively detests the author's hand and wonders why they make them suffer
vs.
>Character that is indifferent and in fact enjoys no longer being morally accountable for his horrific acts, even if only in short bursts

Has this been done before? If not, I might have something.
I will admit that I got this idea from replaying Postal 2

>>22805422
Keep a tiny notebook on hand.

>>22805453
Thanks for the idea anon. I will be using this.

>>22805475
I encourage it, we'll see who puts out a finished product first.

>>22805351
Also you think it's boring with too much explanation? I tried to make the scene exciting with the back and forth conflict but I guess that wasn't enough. Do you think it would be better if I shortened most of the lengthy dialogues?

>>22805494
I don't think it's boring. I think that the principal is not acting naturally. Even if he's talking to a madman, he is supposed to be more like a principal talking to an employee.

Narrator of the 3rd person story as a character either revealed in the end or coming into the picture in the middle. Yay or nay?

How can I improve this story to make it even better than this fag hack

I'll add an image to accompany this

>>22805677

>>22805684

>>22805693
>>22805684
You are in the wrong neighborhood.

>>22805710
you look like strumpets and harlots take advantage of you cuckold voalbutner

>>22805677
I hate it, it's boring, it has impersonal fear-based fetishes and barely sensual body fetishism. There isn't much sex either, no character for the "grunt". This is a mentally challenged underage deviantart user type of story. I can picture the art already, mismatched bright colors, tracing of the main characters of the anime, asymmetric anatomy, giant deformed feet for a big picture. If I would write something better I would keep the middle of the supposed comic and shift the level higher to show one of female pokemon trainers drawing it, with some superficial resemblance of the grunt (female) and the snake to her actual partner. Then her female friend-partner discovers it and gets over enthusiastic without hearing the main girl's protests. She then makes her snake pokemon wrap the girl and suck on her head while femdoming the shit out of her soft toe-curling feet. After that the friend and the snake DP the shy pervert using snake dick and a strapon.

>>22805716
FINE THEN HOW ABOUT THIS

Introducing Finley Hallow, and his pet worm, Banner!

This cocky, devious gentleman is a trophy hunter of all sorts. He travels to various dimensions hunting those he deems worthy prey. Once captured, his assistant Banner doubles as a means of transportation back to his trophy hall. The human cargo can do nothing but writhe helplessly in Banner's belly as they're whisked away to their certain doom!

The special alien enzymes that coat Banner's belly keep the prey alive against their own will. They have no need to eat or sleep once tightly packed inside, and his skin is thin enough where breathing is not an issue. Digestion can take anywhere from mere moments to an entire year depending on his companion's commands. His length is such that multiple victims can be stored inside his form without issue.

Finley is equipped with a long-range hunting rifle, with several futuristic add-ons that he's picked up while hopping dimensions. The gun has a stun setting for when he's not feeling particularly threatened by the prey.

Finley had noticed early in their travels together that Banner's stomach contours so tightly to his prey's body that he needn't even have the prey be released in order to make a completely accurate taxidermy of the victim! He simply could scan the bulge inside Banner's belly, and 3D-Print a perfect taxidermy trophy of whichever body parts he wanted to display. Of course, if he ever did want to see the struggling victim in the flesh again, he need only equip the goggles that rest atop his head, which allow him to see clear through various objects.

The only thing Finley enjoys more than the thrill of the hunt is humiliating his victims before he does away with them for good. He often takes victim's footwear as trophies, and can be seen toying with the captive's bare feet before they disappear into Banner's maw.

Finley takes great pride in defeating powerful foes, and displaying them in his trophy hall as nothing but humiliated visages, most commonly in the form of taxidermy trophy heads or full body replicas. His favorite means of display, however, is inside Banner's belly. Banner will often position himself draped across the carefully laid curtains of Finley's trophy hall, with prey still contained within him. The desperate moans and tight struggling bulge of the still-alive victim accompanies their own defeated taxidermy visage, a sight which Finley finds poetic and relaxing. They stay displayed until Finley grows bored or annoyed with their struggles, at which point the command to digest them is issued to Banner!

>>22805716
REVIEW THIS NEXT

>>22805716
You think the art is BAD?!?!

DUDE LOOK AT IT RIGHT HERE AND NOW:
>>22805684
>>22805693
AND TELL ME ITS DEFORMED SFHIZO SHIT NOW YOU BLINDO

>>22805725
>>22805727
I won't be your foot and vore fan fiction critic, bro. Not even my kinks.

Did the sperglord flip his shit when his OP pic was deleted?

>>22806057
did you not read >>22805018

>>22804498
It could be complete broscience but I remember there being a study that concluded that if you tell someone your plans e.g. what your book is about your brain partially registers it as already being done therefore removing motivation to write the book. moral of the story is don't talk about your writing until it is done

>>22806137
The study wasn't total bunk but the methodology wasn't great, from what I remember. Internal chatter in group environments like script tables and workshops suggests that its more like people conflate talking about writing with writing and were never writing in the first place. Imagine talking about how cool your song is going to be once you have it written.

>90 / 10 / 45 / 6
did this general get auto-saged? wtf is wrong with the moderators these days. it's like they were all replaced with delicate snowflakes.

>>22804498
Have you actually WROTE something ever? Do you understand the process?

>>22804710
>honorable and virtuous women
>homer
There's only one in the entire cycle.

I improved the map from the last thread.

Send opinions.

Hack or Kino?

>>22806228
It makes sense because the pain of writing comes from the fact that the reality of what you write will never be able to reach the ideal of what is in your head. When you talk about it before writing it you are talking about the ideal version of your story but when you sit down to write it you are dealing with the reality.

>>22806277
Skill issue. If i actually manage to connect the pieces it becomes better.

>>22806262
You're falling into the worldbuilding trap

>>22806282
I'm not saying it can't be done, I'm just saying it's a lot more difficult when you've spouted off the ideal version of your book to someone else before even writing.

>>22806277
Writers talk about it differently, often talking around it trying to clarify conceptual difficulties and roadblocks. They've already written into the idea before they share it and aren't just masturbating to a summary. Like anon said, skill issue.

>>22806297
it's less of a skill issue and more of a social issue for me, then, because I have no writer friends

>>22806292
Is the fuel of my story
Every single chapter has a different "POV"(x character interacts with MC)

>>22806293
Musicians have that too, they're called guitarists. They like the idea of being a musician more than the work involved and have nothing to show for it because they build a fantasy and imaginary audience instead of some songs and a real audience.

>>22806301
You've built this fantasy that there is an ideal when you don't even have a story. All that goes out the window as you write and interact with the reality of the narrative. You have to have a version of something, then pinpoint the ideal you want to reach with it.

>>22806302
Then write the story instead of a 5000 year history that no one will care about until you write the story

>>22806326
I have 200 royal road chapters of story in mind and also 5000 years worldbuilding.

Now i just need improve my writing skills.

>>22806336
Are you in the thread's pastebin?

>>22806336
>in mind
Write the fucking story then, this is what I mean by the "worldbuilding trap". Every wannabe writer from /tg/ has a fleshed out world with economical policies, weather patterns, language systems, etc, but none have a story. They keep saying they have it "in mind" but have nothing to show for it because they keep putting it off and worldbuilding more. Write the story first, worldbuild later.

>>22806348
Nope, other anons critique my amateurish writing, and now I am reading as much as possible to improve before publishing.
>>22806352
My worldbuilding exist only to feed its story.
Everything you see will be cannibalized

>Get government contracting job for 110k
>Work from home
>Work 5 minutes a day, maybe an hour max
>Have time now to finally write my strange fiction horror short stories
>Doomscroll 4chan, reddit, tiktok, instagram, etc, until end of the day

I'm a useless piece of shit.

>>22806362
Which one was that then? I read stuff from here.

>>22806306
Yeah, it's a problem. I haven't spoken about my writing to anybody in the past year because it's just pointless and mastubatory. Much more satisfying to give somebody a finished work and say "I wrote this."
>>22806319
>You've built this fantasy that there is an ideal when you don't even have a story.
It can happen even during the outlining stage. There will be gaps in the plot or story that you are comfortable with at the early stages that make or break your writing when it comes to the finished product.

>>22806371
LitRGP with slow start.
Everything you read will be rewrite
>>>22787941

>>22806366
Same general job situation here ans got into a really good groove over past 2 years - pick a time (say 10am) and set a 30 minute timer on your laptop and just write without editing in googledocs until the timer beeps - get app blocks on phone/laptop in that time.

Do this every day. Once you finish a short story or chapter take two days or so to just edit and polish it several times.

That's the system that worked for me.

>>22806375
It's also much more productive to hand someone a mostly complete draft and say "you can see where I fucked myself". Then you're talking about the writing itself and not ideals and ideas divorced from the work.

>>22806387
This sounds good, I'll give it a go, thanks!

>>22805422
Get a better brain retard.

>>22805453
>>22805475
>>22805481
I think you will be thrilled to find out Revenge of the Slop King does both.

I'm sitting here playing with chekov's gun and trying to decide if I want or even need that kind of violence. Nothing like murder in a love story, I tell you what.

>>22806352
But if I don’t know who the protagonist’s mother’s first lover’s third pet was named then the reader will know I half asses my world and won’t care about the story!

>>22806366
I want this job how do i get it?

>>22806812
One of the best uses of Chekhov's gun in my opinion is that gun scene in East of Eden. But you can use the device more like the rule of three. It doesnt have to result in violence. You are only building anticipation and vaguely bring up the reader's memory before the reveal.

>>22806833
Ooh, that would work pretty well. I do see violence as the clear and logical solution but this is also a story of change. But I'm torn if that kind of violence is unwarranted or endemic to the problem at hand. It's something to think on. Thanks.

>>22806812
I love guns in fiction. Already thinking about a scene where it is used, going to have to make that rusty shotgun into a narrative device now.

>>22805511
Not enough info to give an opinion.

>>22805511
I am Jack's complete indifference.

Here's my idea.

>Battle Action Figures
>Dominated by boys with bad ass robots and monster dolls
>shoots missiles, fire breathing, and all typical male fantasy stuff
>A tomboy girl wants to enter using her cute girly doll
>Uses girl items like frying pans, ribbons, needles, string, stickers, glitter, etc.
>CAN SHE WIN AND TAKE TITLE OF THE WORLD GREATEST DOLL FIGHTER?!

How does a frying pan beat a sword knight?

>>22806863
They're so potent in the way a knife isn't. A knife is a tool of art while a gun just kills people dead. It has one function.
>He'd almost believe that [picking up a hitcher this far out was the right thing to do] if he weren't yellow as a sunflower. The heater weighing down his coat pocket was just good business, this was rough country.
There's no way around it once you choose to drop something like that.

>>22807160
>Female protagonist
Passed and trashed

>>22807205
fine fine. We'll change it to a twink boy that's super poor and only has a cute little girl doll to battle with. he just wants to be one of the guys, but because he is poor, ugly, and starving, his only chance for some money is to be a professional doll battler.

But all he has is a doll he found in the trash while looking for food. Better?

>>22807229
Don't listen to retarded gripes with no elaboration. Obviously you want to contrast femininity and masculinity so use a girl if you want. What's the point of the story? Where are you going with it?

>>22807289
>What's the point of the story?
Girls can enjoy boy things too! And it's mass appealing enough to try and get traditionally published in the coveted 8-14 age slot which can lead to movie deals!
>Where are you going with it?
Absolutely nowhere.

>>22806262
What the FUCK am I looking at

>>22807160
>Tomboy
>Girly girl
Already retarded

>>22807331
That's clever. Yeah, your original idea is fine.

"Perhaps our capacity to create is evidence that we ourselves were created in the image and likeness of God?"
-Andrei Tarkovsky

>>22807337
Kino

>>22806844
>>22806833
I did some brief brainstorming and have a few things to consider. If anyone else has any ideas, I'd love to hear them.

>have a lot of pre written dialogue to fit in later
>decide to introduce a new character that travels with the Mc about 50% into the story
>shes not involved in any of the stuff Ive written
>compensate by writing her into any dialogue ideas I get for the remaining weeks
>now passing 40k words
>now have far too little dialogue to fill the first half without her

weird how that works sometimes

>>22807951

>>22806262
looks well-realized, good work

Stay positive because they want to know they can work with you.

>>22806262
turn that into words i give a shit about (you wont)

>>22808486
Read the lore anon

>>22808486
I've actually done it. I wrote a chapter where I dumped all the lore, 2000 words of a girl looking at a map and explaining it from her point of view. Perhaps tomorrow, I'll rewrite it for a more neutral perspective.

Just wait anon

>>22805422
Unironically just go to the bathroom and type it up on your phone :|

>>22806238
Yeah, I've written a lot. Maybe about three million words. But that was a long time ago.

>he can't describe his book in 50 words or less
lol

>>22808578
hype

What is a cool synonym for "traitor", "backstabber" or "betrayer"? I can find nothing good on the net

>>22808992
if it’s a fantasy story, using an insult that draws from that world might be cool

>>22808943
50 words is too generous

>>22809020
Insults? It's for the title of a villainous character, and yeah, fantasy setting

>>22808992
>>22809038
Like a nickname, a title?

>>22809038
>insults?
are you actually confused by that?

is anyone here actually writing realism or maybe even autofiction?

>>22809062
Depending on how you define that, maybe.

>>22809062
ive seen a lot of realism posted here. i think it generally gets grouped in with litfic

>>22807751
Hah, and just yesterday I thought that some of my themes and motifs must've already been talked about and explored. No idea's original after all, but I couldn't guess that the next day I'd read this quote. Thanks for posting!

AAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaAAAaaaAAAaaAaAAaaRRRGGGHHH!
AaaARGH AAARGHH AAAAAAAARGHHHHH!!!

>>22809049
Yeah, like the Traitor of Gondor or whatever, but cooler

>>22809098
this but unironically

>>22809106
Here's something lazy for you to work with.
https://ck2.paradoxwikis.com/Nicknames

>>22809063
>>22809075
how do you make it romantic? or can you go even further and make it idealistic?

I think I finally thought of something I'd like to write again, and something that I would be dedicated enough to see through. But it does not have an audience, is not going to make money, and is not what I 'planned' to write in order to make a career.
Life is strange.

>>22802491
I wrote something, a musing of a visit to a cafe today. Have you seen this scene before?

https://pastebin.com/QRaB0EPe

Interested in hearing how you guys develop a story idea/premise. Do you write out plot points, or come up with a designing principle etc?

my outlines are never enough I always end up with a visionless mess

>>22809376
I simply write

>>22809499
I feel very overwhelmed without at least a few bullet points of where the story will go. Without those I have no sense of direction for the story.

Do you find you have a good idea of where your story starts and ends before you begin? And do you write your stories chronologically by default?

>>22809540
All I really need is a solid starting point. It can be a simple one-sentence thought, or an observation. Everything else, who's there, why are they there, what do they want, where are they going, it starts to come clear as the scene is being written and details emerge. There's no reason to overthink it beforehand. When you've discovered enough, how it all should end becomes clear on its own. What's important is that you get to work and aren't left trapped in a maze of plans.

>>22803529
At my desktop, using OpenOffice Writer. I use Notepad for a formal outline. Sometimes, I handwrite scraps of ideas, but I've never had success writing a "long" rough draft by hand; I tend to get frustrated typing it up.

>>22808992
Something that references the treachery for which they are known, like Jaime "Kingslayer" Lannister.
inb4 NOOOO NOT A GURM EXAMPLE "THE MORE SHE DRAAAAAAAAAAAANK!"

HERE BROS THE LORE
>>22808486
>>22808984
>>22806262
Be wary; this is a LitRPG, so its troops are present. Also, I avoided naming all the heroes because it's still a work in progress.

>>22809648
The general outline of the map looks similar to a map I designed like 5 years ago so for a moment I thought you were my Arab friend ripping me off without my knowledge.

>>22809759
Post it

>>22809376
>how you guys develop a story idea/premise
I usually get an image in my head. It just comes.
>Do you write out plot points, or come up with a designing principle etc?
I have obscure silhouettes of scenes and I try to fit them into plot point roles. I mostly keep everything in my head untill I can write out a complete outline. I study and restudy plot structure and recall what I've read to figure out how to make something with a good structure and satisfying scenes. Simultaneously I develop the characters and the world around them. A little part of it is also thinking about plans for the future if this one particular part of the story is going to work out so I don't have to change it all later.

>>22809768
It's buried somewhere in my DM chat logs. The key features were two major landmasses and some channels/island stuff. Like if your map was mirrored as in pic rel.

>>22809376
I come up with some themes, a few characters, a problem to highlight, and the trappings of a setting to support it and chew on it for a while, letting it build. It's not until I get a few nuclear scenes and vignettes that match the mood I want that the juices start flowing. Then I come up with a bare outline and start writing into it as far in media res as I can before working backwards from there to the point that I have the least amount of information and build up necessary to make it make sense and have impact. I probably only have like 2 or 3 pages of notes before I get deep into the writing and do a lot more work on the editing and second draft side of things.

>>22809578
>longhand
Transcribing that shit is a nightmare.

>>22809782
>two major landmasses
Too vague, find it

How unoriginal is stealing from real world mythologies for your world's lore? I'm feeling like a hack but some myths are just so cool

>>22808992
https://www.onelook.com/thesaurus/

>>22809800
I'm using solomonic dæmonology and faerie lore right now. It helps being based in what is ostensibly the real world, which is what rubs me the wrong way with epic fantasy. Instead of being "over there" or "back then" it tries and fails to be somewhere else entirely.

>>22809800
We're all hacks here, anon. Just accept it already.

>>22806702
It's good, I was thinking of a more sarcastic than resentful take, but it makes sense.

>>22809648
More like The Holy Kino.

>>22802491
How do I get back at a writer in my workshop who has gone out of her way to be unhelpful to me (extremely short critiques that are always negatives, never answers any questions when I ask her about the feedback, rudely calls my writing unpublishable in front of the workshop) and also slander my reputation (been saying shit about me at all parties, telling professors that I am a poor writer, etc.)? This goes way beyond normal fucking behavior

@22809927
>workshop
>professors
Appeal to a higher-up (like the dean), obviously, b8-kun.

>>22809943
Why would this be bait? Is there some wg meme I'm not getting?

>>22809800
Every book is a collection of other stories

>>22809960
Because you're getting bullied by a girl. We're autistics here, women don't talk to us

>>22809927
(You) are also the writer in the workshop.

>>22809927
Break her arms or rape, no other solution

I lost the will to write after my writing costed me my job...

>>22809927
Post your writing. Most likely she's right.

>>22810505
>costed

>>22809927
She sounds like a bitch with personal problems but she might be onto something, so post writing.

I think rape is the answer.

what's the best thesaurus

>>22809927
Tell the professor she's behaving inappropriately and it bothers you, instead of whining anonymously online like a little bitch?

>>22808992
Jew

>>22809648
You appear to have things shown in the west labelled as the east

>>22809648
Get your compass right, these places are literally all over the place. Ignoring the fact that things in the west are called east (map can be rotated, really) but then you have 0 consistency in the actual descriptions. How the fuck is Oldmarch in the east, but Highlans [sic] in the north?

DWeb Bimshire photorecovery, calibrable, pigjump, vernonioid, esophagojejunoanastomotosis, EBCDIC, inguinocrural hamatsa cryopedologist, Prineville Honeydon, Mealer, neosynthesized oxycotton, barghmote nucleuslike Agrippinian, Outen, Right, Gümüşhane sideflash metasyncrititcal, nondazzle Mesropyan scrike, astrologess, resiphon noncontrast, kilopixel flr badnik, chackle, demould, enterpriseless Sopwith, qasbah, Norristown, depriming, dihydratase, startscum Stevinson, sulphophilic ashoebi, jeogori, Poughkeepsie, staker, harbus, carboxydotrophy, trailbreaker, Caryl, hawt, exocone, undulipodial Chadron, tenderpreneurial enzymatization, lanchang botryopterid, OMAM, nowy disocclusion, Vikky helminthous, Arnall Staheli, spilliken scalliwag, jool Soltys Hanafite, thyrosphere autem Shaeed, unballoted, misdetect subtomentose, unfainting, Saxtti, biquadrated audav, chalasia, outcrazy, oi!, acrochordoid, posttetanic Beardall, nasalance, polyanhydride, Gruetzmacher, counterspeech, aelphopoiia, frind, recontrol, cryoburn, ADIRU, Lechman, beganna décolletée, keratorefractive, susegad kayagum Raudenbush Moyne, uridylase diaplectic, Rietveld Batam, unstumbling, Ismailia, xenomorphously retroduplicate, fallower overmigration, sunnybell, McWilliam, restaurateurial encephalomeningocoele, clinoorthostatic pima forehander, scramaseax Rimkus, radiomitigative teleman, Zausner, arthrosclerosis, softminded NBFC stonecatcher, megaseismic Edmore wht disspread, holewort Rivenburg McKenney Blunsdon McPartin, Francophobic instructoress, nolo Qianjiang, transluce Dewhirst, excogitator resymbolization, bulul dat. gunfit, doha leave something to be desired, Valla phagotype, brevideciduous, tolzey TAZ, becapped, overbowl, photoproduce Saraikistan, lactocyclicin, Macormick disyllabify mermaidish synchesis, Sternbergian ilama natratoxin cataplana, subboreal, alloalbumin, Asperger’s, minstrelling Prescot shariatize thienopyrimidine, antimycoplasma, quisutsch, wheatsel Scinde, ammoniaporin, misdemeanorization, Dodwell Ballinascarty, subfalcate cyclosporinemia, HazCollect graviresponse, ethnoprimatologist Sapele, Legrix, weyward decategorialize cheif Creigiau, Obamaesque victocrat, antibovine, Islamocracy overfinely, DemoKKKrat Indophilia, counterbase, pregrowth, -scape, Lù Lupton Homerist morphinist, recommendability, youngsome croydon, dorsolongitudinal utaka Qinshui bloomlessness, antiischaemic, Yanukovich, redsear philandrist, calcosphere polyfold, Dingus Xujiahui, naturalia antipickpocket, Yacuiba fauch thioazafluoranthene, Eswatini lindsayoid, ofer poliovirion, Choson, Adamian, unstudentized Loosley, kidsicle neuroophthalmologist, chlorophototrophic imaam, mysticly, Tynion, nonhumane fabrica Corpus Accompong, most like, Tanzimat, tubocapsanolide, Burtonize astoundingness, Younglove, baditude, unostentation, proximoventrally, Beckerian obesogenesis, panegyricon Millhouses, multityrosine nothag, midprophase, Schoffstall, Hethoumid, autocompaction, Baggrow, abradial,

unitunicate Boxmoor, Labine telomerically, Bückeburg topsnail, preperception peritelomere, Goracle subcu Exumas, penaid, Ibadhism, Garveyist Ozenne Sugbuanon, jammabandi, Schwarting, platformist, youseselves helibiking, traino antisticking, unduplicitous antibuyout, Etheldred, spiralise carbonucleophile, bawdkin fructuous, simpleheartedly, servantlessness deprenyl, Oftersheim, withdrawingness, Gizeh, trisemic, tubuloreticular, verticillated, orthagan, actionness subculturing, damkjernitic pedocalic sunscreened unsexist GPGPU Netherseal, diversative quasisymmetrical halonitroalkane, echomimia Leitchfield, Bighorns, autopisty undenotability, biocartilage, reexcavation, Óðr, clearwater, Butterknowle, stegosaurine, parabaptist, cerambycine, Ostrum, carpetlayer, jackaninny, Euchaneia, Kunderian postinternalization, hypermanic Hydaspes, microoxic leafwork, epsilonize geophile, Lanark, Horst, Tamika, chemiotaxis, spermiation, agbero, Gabeheart, noncompactness, Aghlabid flava, sciroc, eumastacid, QPA, benzeneazophenol, Chaytor unmundane, vesiculotubular, monoselective, Cornec nevy tetrasulfonated, Jebediah superhacker, Hartington Middle Quarter, wiesenboden pBzK tenuation, geekdar, worryless overspent parkability, icastic inconclusible, secondable, unmess, grammarize, Wiehe Misako, bidialectalist PTLV, commutal pranotherapy, UQAM Auric MRCSC, bobbe, TOB, Whitehawk, untaloned, possewoman kondakarion, quasinorm, integrativity, Jiangbei Turnbough, Brysonian solidate spasmodism, haftable rereplication, Saint-Désert, plasminolysis, percesocine, dedoubling, photocaging, mictoproteomic unsclerotised cytobiocompatible Budukh, cathodally, Kreiner, hemacytometry Grumbles CADPAT, dealgan underallotment, zischägge, McNairney, Reign Schettino, armt. Droit, ipomeanine antistaining, aero-servo-elasticity, telemaintenance, Cedillo, Hálogi, devolver anaphalantiasis, yuremamine, subescheator, halfsibling besalted, Adrien Bradenton, Artioli Trowbridge, divalency Concepción, craniotomize ouncil, ovidore dictyoid, pogonophobic checkerboardedness, becreep Wildasin, mystery consumer, bioinvader, underawing geriatrophile, serpenticide, yottaparsec, ‘mid undulipodial, restreamline, the Han River, Waleswood, microfarm, tarnishment, halfplane, postselective, neuroangiogram, Wiemers choko, Dirham, Chestertown, headpost, Varash, Balfourian, scamster, Shurlock, bania cuten Koshchey, Kumārajīva, rortyness, Matei, latrinalia Cherepovets, organonomy, autocollimating Pyongyangology, unhooted, leptinemic undisguisedness, MacLean, Bn, awesomeosity, pseudothermal Sharla cizers, odontodysplasia, Arrowtown, bulldoggy, endiron, CTOL, axonopathic layfolk, disguised, Skirrow, belongingly, unextreme, makher, ipomæa, creativise fantasterrific Ulbricht, mittless, Pietri Saint Petersburg paradox, Napolitana melinjo, nalmetrene Chobanyan, anataxis ginger ninja, unofficiality, patrilineal, nonmelanomatous coregnant, cementing ultraelliptic Zub, Afghanize pontific Copenhagenist,

Apt zoocenosis, MerDer, downteching, ghe Midville, macrophenomenal carbeen anabaenoid, Attalid, Hyer, Farzad, diffusing, plasmidal ballistometric audiocentrism, Broussard KwaNdebele, skywards, Talien, Baytona, laryngismal macrotrace, intracephalic isolant, intranationally predicter, clupeiform victorie, cubebene Narby, yearsworth, nonadministration, Cyr. Fuhkien unnurturing, acromiohumeral frob subbrachian, seizural Apohele, tetracyanonickelate, Ganarew -ety, antistable Novocheboksarsk, transregionally deitalicize Rotherby, yazh, Messier, nontoxigenic synecious bubeleh, photorepaired, unlibidinous radiotag, kmps, Mellow, Hole, pseudohexameric, entabulation, Newgate, eucosterol, ongo extramembraneous, tundun, domainwide, loaferdom, Penkridge, arenicin, uppersemilattice dungeree, goundou, suprapubian, self-supplier, contractarian, decerebrize, fribbleism, Bethuel tridecahydrate, unrelaxingly, affinition, tigridia

what the fuck

>>22810693
>>22810786
Sorry a typo both the Dune and Oldmarch are in the west.

>but then you have 0 consistency in the actual descriptions
This is not just a description; it's a modified dialogue inside a chapter that I've altered. Additionally, all the different states have their own unique stories.

>>22810505
>>22811241
To be honest, nobody but the biggest autists cares about a map.

>>22811348
The more they read, the more they will get into it. It also helps a lot during writing; if you know the world around the MC is alive, the story will write itself."

>>22810941
>>22810946
>>22810949
sadly, this spam gibberish is the most interesting thing posted to this thread so far

>be me
>arrogant narcissist
>need to improve my stories further (they need to be as perfect as I am)
>talking with friend about character development
>turns out that in order to have a dynamic character, that character needs to be able to be wrong sometimes
>shock.png
>tfw I can't do, write, or even imagine that
>tfw I have finally found something beyond my capacity
So this is the power of being psychotypical...

>>22811955
>his main character wasn't a perfect genius who schools everyone in his promixity all the time
Plato truly was the first progression fantasy writer

>>22811955
It's my understanding that LitRPG revolves around such "Mary Sue" characters. Perhaps you should look into writing that genre.

>>22812105
It's not so much Mary Sue stuff as it is characters remaining static and having zero inner conflict because they already know exactly what they want and how they want to get it done.
I don't know the LitRPG crowd but maybe you are right though. A type of self-confident go-getter may make for a good MC, if I can learn how to do the number crunching stuff.

It was nice meeting you

>>22809927
Ignore her, or respond with class

>>22811955
You're not "arrogant" for not wanting to be critiqued. Most critiquers are vague and counterproductive. "This is is shit" is not helpful.

Would it be unwise to take some story ideas I have for my second "act" and work backwards to connect it to the first one? For some added context my first act is much larger than the next two since it has most of the worldbuilding and character development for the main cast but I don't want to muddy up my progression of the story by adding things that will only make sense much later too often.

>>22812590
attack your idea from every angle, be prepared to cut anything you plan, etc.
whatever works man.

>>22809782
Nigga you plagiarized my map

>>22812746
My map is the HRE but KINO.
Bet all that borders aren't natural.

>>22812590
My story for the first 2 chapters introduces the setting and characters, then becomes different in chapter 3 due to POV switch, then becomes much different and much slower until the end from 4 to 5.

Instead of infodumping it all on the reader, I introduce new characters and concepts in a by-the-way form. I'm starting to worry it'll be TOO slow, how can it not be when it's a story mostly about a guy bitching about stuff he did at a campfire?

>>22812746
Hey, wait a minute... That looks familiar...

>>22812590
>>22812842
For infodumping I recommend following what I call the Lamborghini principle. Lamborghinis are really cool and there's a lot interesting information about what they're capable of and the engineering heritage that affords them those capabilities, but would you rather sit in the passenger seat of a parked Lamborghini listening to man with a boring voice and an anorak explain all the intricacies of the brakes and engine aspiration and torque to horsepower ratio and all the other things that make it cool and fast, or thrash it around a racetrack? The Lamborghini "lore" is only interesting, really only tolerable at all, when it's relevant to something exciting the car is currently doing. The incredibly advanced brakes are interesting when you're shooting into a corner twice as fast as you could with regular brakes. The aerodynamics are cool when the downforce on the back wheels keeps you from spinning out on the sharp bend at high speed, and the supercharger is exciting when you put your foot down on the way out and quickly accelerate instead of waiting for it to kick in.
Infodumps need to be interesting and narratively relevant or no one cares.

>>22812187
>It's not so much Mary Sue stuff as it is characters remaining static and having zero inner conflict because they already know exactly what they want and how they want to get it done.
It depends on what you're writing.

Hollywood movies are based on personal growth and self-actualization--no doubt due to being developed in twentieth century--but not every story has to be a Hollywood movie.

Comic books were also developed in the twentieth century, but all the conflict is external. Batman doesn't have to grow or change in every issue; he just has to beat the Joker.

Don't trust people who think one set of rules applies to every genre, medium, and style.

>>22813086
>Infodumps need to be interesting and narratively relevant or no one cares.
The problem is knowing whether it's interesting or not. My infodumps? Very narratively relevant. Are they interesting? I don't know. Is a guy talking about his old friends and the fucked up (morally) shit they did interesting?

I have an idea that I think could be a really cool story. Problem is I'm now at the stage where I like the idea too much to ruin it with my shitty writing.

>>22803767
Word Online or 365 or whatevernit's called now? It's word, it's free, it saves automatically in OneDrive all the time so you can access it from any device anytime.

>>22813828
I doubt your idea is that good. Everyone has "good" ideas when they can't rven write yet. But soon you'll realize that you've never been good at anything.

>>22813980
I don't think the idea is good, just interesting to me. It's an okay idea.

>>22813828
Your first stage at writing it is always going to ruin it, editing and revisions are where you save it. I've ruined every one of my ideas by putting them down but I ruin them less over time as I continue and eventually redeem them.

Plus once written you get to broaden them as you couldn't before. Just get on it.

>>22807160
>How does a frying pan beat a sword knight?
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK, I WROTE OUT A WHOLE EXPLANATION AND SUGGESTIONS FOR THIS, BUT I FUCKING RESET THE PAGE ON ACCIDENT.
Anyway, I'll just do it again.
The frying pan could act as a shield and a mace, but it could also be filled with things and have a lid on it.
She could open a vent to let out steam to blind the other robots, or fill it with hot candy that hardens when she tosses it on them and slows them down.
You could use a pastry cutter as brass knuckles, and this one is even called Last Confection, which would be a pretty great name for a weapon in my opinion.
Put drill bits in a beater.
have a wire whisk that can fold over the robots and tangle them up.
My background is more in baking, so naturally these ideas are geared towards only the cooking part of being womanly, and not sewing and the like.
Anyway, good luck, Anon.

>>22809376
I had a general idea, and I had some scenes that I wanted to make and an ending in mind.
As I continued, I found that I was writing with a different theme than I originally thought of, and I leaned into it somewhat.
My last written chapter had an outline in my head, but it took me a full day to write it all out and the way that it happened wasn't exactly what I started out with in my head.

>>22813362
That's my point. How interesting it is depends on context. I don't give a shit about all the things that let my lambo go fast if I'm stuck in traffic. On a stretch of empty highway with no cops around, that subject becomes interesting. And that's real life. A story about events that didn't really happen has to work harder than real life does to get my attention.

In fiction, the context and emotional investment is provided by the characters. I don't particularly care why there is sectarian violence in the Central African Republic but I would if my best friend was there. Your main character is the reader's best friend. If he cares about anything in your story it is because it impacts someone in whose struggles he invests some feeling.

As much as it gets rightfully shit on for being lazy and unoriginal, the very last thing the worldbuilding in Harry Potter could be accused of tediousness. It's always framed with the main character's personal experience. It's a problem he has to overcome, a revelation that amazes him, his last hope in a dire fix, etc. It never sits down and talks your ear off with a bunch of stuff you know didn't really happen. It immerses you, even if what it's saying is trite or nonsensical. 99% of readers don't even care that the worldbuilding is weak because of this.

Short little story about a barbarian fighting a mythological monster. Just wanted to write something sword and sorcery-esqu and practice writing an action sequence.

>>22811955
You can’t imagine being wrong? I mean, you were wrong during that conversation, anon, I’m sure if you look back, you’ll find plenty of situations where you were wrong. Plenty.

>>22814726
I put it to you that it's not that he's never wrong, it's that he can't admit it.

>>22814714
Overall good, I enjoy it.
I think it might help your flow for combat if you split up your independent clauses into separate sentences, or at least varied it a bit. In the paragraph starting "At once the man threw himself..." is good, but the third sentence being so long ('and pounced its claws... but he threw himself... and the beast merely pounded...") seems to put it at ends with the content. If you split it (...towards the man. (But) He threw himself aside...) I think it would come across a bit stronger, as it is it seems a little slow or even paced where it ought to be quicker compared to the intro, imo.That could be the effect you're intending but I think some variety in length ought to do good. Would require some slight rephrasing but I think it could help.
Granted writing like this isn't my main area so take it with a grain of salt.

You hit a good rhythm at the end, I like the last paragraph. And generally some good rhythm, nice descriptions. It just seems to slow a bit where it shouldn't.

>>22803476
Yeah, made an entire species out of The Red Dragon on the Welsh flag, Y Ddraig Goch and it's "little brother" Y Ddraig Aur.

>>22808992
Oathbreaker, kin(g)slayer and damned are the three that come to mind for me. But, ultimately, the context you have is what matters the most before picking and choosing.

>>22814714
ESL? The language use is a little off in a few places:
>wings like that of a dragon
Like those of a dragon, or like a dragon's.
>pounced its claws
May be just missing a comma but just in case simply pounced is correct. Claws don't pounce, but the whole cat.
>desert floor
Not a term in English. The sand or the ground or the dust or maybe the desert plain are suitable.
>trailing it's circumference
It's is probably just a typo but trailing circumference is awkward phrasing.

Generally your English vocabulary seems limited. Lots of repeated phrases, especially "like X" and "the beast". There is not much variety in the way similar things are expressed.

I do like the general structure and how the scene plays out with a bit of back and forth followed by the warrior seizing the initiative and running with it, and the last paragraph has an interesting angle on the old hero slaying monsters trope, but I do feel that the nuts and bolts prose is letting the piece down.

Normally I would recommend something to read as an example of how to do this but I don't know much about fantasy action so hopefully some other anon can make a suggestion. Maybe Conan or something idk.

How do you know when you are good enough at writing to take on your big book ideas without making a fool of yourself?

>>22815330
You don't but you need to take them on anyway and improve them with revisions

>>22808992
Turncoat, double-crosser, renegade, snake/rat/narc, fifth columnist, a scab?, a deserter, a quisling, all of those fit, although each brings with it a context that may not be present in your novel. You wouldn't call someone a narc on a medieval setting, for example.

I'm quite stuck with the new story before even writing an outline. Just rethinking and rethinking the first introductory chapter. It seems boring and bland, no way to excite the reader for the story. What can I listen to out of music or read out of literature for inspiration? The story is far future science fantasy.

>>22815706
petyr tchaikovsky and his Nutcracker Suite

>>22807160
>have giant frilly dress
>sword guy tries to stab girl doll in the leg
>succeeds but girl doll spins
>sword guy loses sword
>anime explanation and exposition: sword guy was tricked where the legs are! His perception where the legs are became miscalculated because the giant dress messed with his perception! And with single spin dance move from the girly doll, the sword is lost! The sword couldn't cut through the layers of cotton and twine! Now the girl doll is behind the sword guy and with a giant thwack to the knight's skull from her cast iron pan, the knight falls and gets promptly stepped on with spiked heels

>>22813828
I made this post.

I think I finally found my method, boys. I get bored and exhausted roughly 1k words into writing, but if I stop then, I can actually recharge just in time for the day after. This allows me to write about 7k words per week, which is actually a pretty good pace. I didn't think I had it in me to write again, but this works pretty reliably. I may be able to get back into this craft after all. Now the only other problem is that it feels like my writing is shit, but I've seen really bad writers cut it so, hey, why not me too?
Feels like... we're all gonna make it bros.

How do you guys go about writing women? No meme answers, please. I'm trying to figure out how to elaborate on a woman without it being girlboss-esque but also to not overly victimize and reduce the character.
The American lib answer would obviously be just to not include misogyny within your worldbuilding, but I feel as if failing to include the realities in the difference between the sexes is not only ingenuine but will in turn cause your female characters to either act as pseudo-males with a pair of tits or again, reduce them to girlbosses. I've tried reading female-written lit to get an idea of what the general thought process for a more intelligent and strong(er) woman might be, but I've gotten to the point that all I can find is shitty modern crime fiction and smut. Modern crime fiction isn't helpful at all, as it is modern firstly and the female characters aren't often put in the situations that my lit concerns. I've read most of the classics written by women, but 99% of those are very ironic and sarcastic in their portrayal of women and their place in society.

>>22816051
I literally never write women. I'm not that interested in human females.

>>22816083
>No meme answers, please.

>>22816051
I'll start by shilling myself, since a female friend said that I wrote good female characters, then I'll go into my method.
I can't promise that I can give the best advice, since I have 7 sisters, and the way I write comes natural to me, this isn't something that I learned from others, but rather I learned it passively.
https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/56518/changling-the-child-from-the-woods

People might say some shit about how you can write characters as if their gender isn't important and anyone can be sex swapped, but that is retarded.
I write them as people first, yes, but that doesn't mean that I could just gender swap my characters and it wouldn't change them at all.
Women, as a rule, are more emotional, and people may throw up their arms at this, but again, 7 sisters, 3 younger, 4 older, so I have a fair pool of women I've been around my entire life.
My sisters ended up being more 'girlboss', or 'trad wife', none of my sisters ended up dainty, but we have had a small personal farm with chickens and a garden that we maintained, so being tomboys is just natural.
This is important because you should take into account where they were born and what environment they were raised in.
In a rural setting women often pick up hobbies that are either related to housekeeping, such as sewing, or outdoors, like fishing and shooting guns.
One sister got into construction like my father.
One is a stay at home mom but she cleans for some richer people we know.
One is head of housekeeping at a hotel during the summer, and she also has a venue, but she mostly spends her days at home taking care of the kids.
If a man is a hardass, then crying is a failure of stoicism, and he will be mocked.
If a woman is a hardass and cries, then people will see her as needing support.
Being emotional doesn't mean yelling and screaming and playing the victim, but one of my sisters was like that when she was younger.
In this Context, I mean they are emotional open, they are allowed to show a full range without being mocked for it, and they understand this.
When my sisters are pissed, you are going to know it, because none of them are quiet angry, they don't simmer, they blow up.
Then at the same time, when pushed back, some of them react with extra anger, and others react with tears.
Not every man is stoic of course, but even emotionally open men maintain some level of stoicism that I don't really see in women.

In closing, I've been drinking, but think about now just how they react, but why they react the way that they do.
A woman who yells at a man is seen as a bitch, but most people ignore it.
A man who yells at a woman is seen as abusive, and he is harshly criticized for it.
A woman hits a man and people generally don't care, she may get a slap on the wrist unless she used a weapon, and even then probably still.
A man hits a woman and people look at him like a demon, even if it is in self defense.
Women are shielded in some ways and this warps some of them.

>>22816096
This isn't a meme answer when many literary classics don't have female characters in them

>>22816096
Not joking, so not a meme. I don't really understand why you would write a female character, especially if you don't feel an artistic desire to do so without asking how to.

>>22816101
>especially if you don't feel an artistic desire to do so without asking how to
Feeling an artistic desire to do something != you are immediately adept at execution, anon. What a retarded statement. Getting perspective on the internal workings of the opposite sex when you've lived your entire life as a man is nearly necessary to properly represent a character.
>>22816100
Saying
>I'm not that interested in human females
is a meme answer. Saying
>I don't write women
isn't.
>>22816099
Thanks for the reply, anon. My only two siblings are also sisters, so maybe I should tap into that a bit more. I've already properly considered the upbringing and how that might affect response- as you said, a man and woman raised under the same circumstances will not have the same reaction, however. I think, based off of your description, it would be best if I determined in more detail the specifics in terms of social structure before writing any more demo pages.

>>22816051
Your mind is being consumed by the Hegelian dialectic. Forget all of your conceptual notions of how women work, what their place is in the world, what the best way to write them is etc. Start from a clean slate. Then pay attention to the lives of normies, from the most primitive to the more refined ones. Develop your database. See what is typical, then find out what is atypical but real, and what is interesting. Above all, figure out what archetypes you like writing, and how you like writing them - a female character that you enjoy writing is x10000 better than contorted "realistic" depiction that you hate. Read good fiction and nonfiction that involves female characters, and also non-fiction or autobiographical stuff by (worthwhile) women, and when you strike gold, analyse what makes that stuff gold. This will prove very helpful.
Finally, write what you know from life. The women I know? Hysterical, unhinged, insecure, stubborn, hard working, depressive, stressed, loyal, childish, funny, stupid, intelligent, seeking all types of ecstasy and escape, resilient, greedy, controlling, light-hearted, full of yearning, caring, pleasure lovers, money lovers, luxury lovers, earnest, passionate, subconscious manipulators. Usually I grab a few of these and imbue them with some trait that I myself have until I have a coherent and compelling character type. My favourite character design is a violent, unhinged and bold woman, whose daring ends where emotional awareness begins, whose actions are motivated by an extreme romantic love for another, whose loyalty for her beloved is beyond question, and whose tender heart is a complete mess on the inside, making her too afraid to confess to her beloved just how much she loves him, and whose anxious insecurity means she can only even barely acknowledge to herself that she'd sooner die than live without him. Now, with this design, if you chop off her being in love and her being loyal, you would get the typical "macho woman" of "feminist girlboss fantasy", and perhaps if I did so, I would get some positive feedback from the feminist crowd. But that would completely ruin the character. The beauty of the character is the precarious balance between a loyal, pure and earnest heart, overcome by darkness, vulgarity, an anxious feeling of worthlessness before the goodness of the beloved, and an overcompensation for insecurity via power hunger and drive for dominance. She tries to impress her beloved with her power because she foolishly fears that her heart alone is not enough. And I love this. I love her. I love her so much, I could never get her character long. She is both beautiful and ugly in my eyes, I see her as a wounded, noble bird struggling to live proudly as it should. And this makes me want to see her heal. It makes me want to write her. I know myself and I know what is compelling to my taste. I write that. Critics can suck it.

>>22816158
>wrote long instead of wrong
It's over.

>>22815706
Don't worry about enticing a reader into a story that doesn't exist yet. Let it be bland for now and get the whole thing on paper. You will never finish it like this.

>>22816113
>Getting perspective on the internal workings of the opposite sex when you've lived your entire life as a man is nearly necessary to properly represent a character.
If you're writing slop for selling or for a wage. Otherwise you'd know what to write and wouldn't care about getting something conventional or "realistic". It's a character, most likely your protagonist, you're talking about. You can't just learn from someone how to write her.

>>22816051
This >>22816211 may sound like a meme answer but I agree with the anon. You are not supposed to think too deeply about "how" a character should be realistically be. Characters are the biggest units of a story, they have to serve their purpose and while you can and should try to flesh them out, their core being comes first. Imagine how utterly ridiculous it would be if someone tell you a male character is unrealistic because he's irresponsible, cries a lot and is sometimes emotional. A young girl in a modern setting would be absolutely frightened to walk alone at night in an empty part of the town, but some men may be like that too. And if a "critic" tells you your female characters are too "masculine" then you are supposed to bitch slap that thing, not cater to its taste of women.

Thoughts on light novels?

More importantly, thoughts on writing light novels?

I've been having one of those uncomfortable phases where I am wondering if I should bother continue writing at all. I write for fun but there's something telling me I need to leave it at that, don't bother trying to get better, the chances are so slim, it's not worth it.
Has anybody been through this level of self-doubt before where they genuinely considered giving up despite putting years of their life into this?

>>22812187
You do not need to be bad at something in order to improve at it.

Furthermore, improvement is not always about skill or power level. A character could improve by adopting a new moral that improves them from a self-actualization standpoint. They could also make the world around them better with concrete evidence of such. Broaden your horizons.

>>22816262
If it's just for yourself then why stop? Otherwise, slow others your work. Look at it as a chance to improve even more.

>>22816264
Finding people to read my work is hard. I barely know anybody that reads books anyway, let alone an unprofessional one. But it probably is the best way forward from this. I think I've isolated and hidden my work for too long because it'll never be "good enough". I know perfection is a myth but it never seems like I can reach the bare minimum of quality.

>>22816258
>Thoughts on light novels?
Bad literature.
>More importantly, thoughts on writing light novels?
To be advised against.

>>22816258
>Kino's Journey
Now you're just messing with me.

>>22816262
>>22816272
You just have low self-esteem. Are you going to let some kind of mental illness tell you what to do?
With that said, figure out what you want to do with your work. Finding volunteer readers is in my experience practically impossible, so don't burn your psychological course out sending your work off to lazy speedreaders who can't critique properly anyway.

>>22816314
I just grabbed an image.

>>22816294
I guess what appeals to me is the serial nature as well as the brevity. What makes them bad?

>>22816318
>Are you going to let some kind of mental illness tell you what to do?
I don't want to. No, I won't let it. Thank you anon.

>>22816330
I'd start by asking what the hell do you think a light novel even is.

>>22816348
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Light_novel

>>22816332
We're all gonna make it.

>>22816352
I'm not asking for a fucking wikipedia link, I'm asking what do YOU think is a light novel and what do they have in particular that you want to imitate, instead of just writing regular novels? But I'm starting to think you're too young to have this conversation.

>>22816357
If Wikipedia entries are disqualified then you must define what a regular novel is in your own words first.

>>22816357
>>22816376
It is clear you are both spastics so allow me to settle the issue and prevent you from bumping the thread to death over a dumb argument. A light novel is a type of genre slop, often but not always produced as a refined version of a web serial. This type of genre slop lives or dies depending on its popularity with a mass consumer audience, and typically aims at providing an entertaining story as its top priority. Light novels attempt to develop a single story of considerable size, spread over many volumes. The individual volumes may or may not follow a self-contained story structure.

>>22816376
So you have no idea what you actually even want to do. I had a feeling it was going to be like that.

>>22816438
Can an author adopt a format like the light novel - ~50k words per book/ volume, serialized, and genre - but turn out something good as opposed to pure slop?

>>22816663
No and a better question is Do you want to write YA? Because LNs are YA as fuck.

>>22816663
That's a normal size for a lower wordcount book. You can just publish it, with less gain per 1k word maybe since bigger books equal more efficient profit making. The appeal of light novels for authors is that they can be web novels before that and get their reader base and popularity before publishing.

Anyone wanna read my light novel?

>>22816944
I'm 34 and your target demographic isn't old enough to post here.

>>22816990
Didn't know there was an age limit for reading books. What kind of stories do you write?

>>22817010
I don't know what you have to offer if you don't even know your demographic.

>>22802491
I need help with something. I'm writing a martial arts story, but I can't figure out what art our protagonist should use. What I know
>He's of Southeast Asian origin
>He's missing his left arm below his elbow
There's a lot of arts but I can't figure it out

>>22817094
First thought is Muay Thai, as kicking is important to it, but the issue is that it also uses grabs and elbow strikes.

>>22817103
I was considering Silat

>>22802491
I wrote this in a thread yesterday. Its probably still up but people liked it. Wanted to share it with more people. I have to break it up into multis, Sorry if that pisses anyone off but I have to. One sec

>>22817111
I couldn't figure it out. Elephants? Or are they giraffes...pretty clearly elephants, the legs...why such scrawny legs? And what was it even trying to evoke? The answers to these things didn't really concern me, but staring at this fucking painting was the only option I had, for ten hours straight. Staring at it, and asking these questions; if I hadn't forced myself to ask these questions, I would have started asking ones like "why am I chained up in some basement staring at a painting?" or "has God forsaken me?" or "where the fuck am I?" The terror the potential answers to these may induce, made the more meaningless answers to meaningless questions about a painting, seem like a chance to cozy back up into my mother's womb by comparison, and so I stuck with those. For ten hours straight.

Finally, the padlock on the door a few feet to my right, finally began moving, and soon enough I saw a small glimmer of light fill the crawlspace I was confined to. A man stepped in, and while I couldn't see very clearly, I could make out two distinctive features; an old time mustache, like the newsies of the 1920s, and a gentleman's cape. I wasn't sure who he actually was, but one thing was making itself certain: this person, who seemed to have me held captive, was a freak.
"Who the fuck are you and how the FUCK did i get here? My brothers a cop, you're fucki--"
I felt a hand lightly slap my face mid-statement, and before I was able to process the shock of it, that same hand began gently caressing where it had made impact, as if to soothe a wound.
"Shhhhh....my friend. We have only just met! Your questions will be answered, but at the risk of offending you, I must inform you that you're coming off a tad crude. A simple 'hello' would be a fine way to start."
At this point, the door had opened fully, and light filled the room. I had more of an opportunity to study this man in detail; the eccentricities of his appearance only became more pronounced, a pinstripe suit with what appeared to be a living rose in the front pocket, a porkpie hat, and everything he wore was black, except for his bright wight wingtip shoes. He seemed calm, and non-threatening; in fact, despite the scenario, his way of conversation immediately put me at ease. He exuded a mixture of cheerful acceptance and boyish mischief, so while I feared he may pull a prank on me, my fears of being murdered or tortured were readily assuaged.

>>22817103
I did a lot of martial arts research for this story, and while the usual stuff is there (MMA, Boxing, Muay Thai, Karate, Kung Fu, yada yada)
I also include more unknown styles, such as Collar-and-Elbow or Pankration
And some styles that while not real are based in stuff that happens IRL

>>22817117
"Now, my boy, why you're here is not terribly important. What's important, is you are here, and I'm the one who brought you here. Obviously, I had an intention there, but I promise you: it was not anything nefarious. You will not end up as a severed head in my freezer, but you may end up as a friend by the end; or better yet, a playmate!"
I finally spotted it. The eyes. Everything about this man seemed trustworthy, inviting, and thoroughly playful; EXCEPT his eyes. In them, I saw what was not necessarily evil, but was definitely nothing righteous. I saw a hiding place. When a man is not telling a specific li, but is instead, embodying a lie, lying about who he is, he tends to stare off at a distance. You can speak within inches of his face, and he will reply, but his gaze will have already crossed state lines, part of him is elsewhere. This man was like that.
"Playmate? Listen buddy I appreciate it but I don't do all that gay sh--"
"Ho ho! Rest assured, my boy, I appreciate that you think a man of my years has even retained his potency, but I did not bring you here for sex. Earnestly, I am a terribly lonely man, I brought you here for conversation, for friendship."
As I stared at the painting that had been my only friend for half a day now, and then back at the man, it suddenly dawned on me who I was speaking to.
"But...how in the world...you're Salvador Dali!"
He smirked, and proceeded to do a full nobleman's bow.
"Indeed, it is I, the madman himself. How may I be of service?"
I did want to get the fuck out of there, but I had too many questions now. I didn't even care how I was speaking to a man whod been dead for decades; all I cared about was that painting.
"Well, for one thing: what's with the painting? Elephants? Stiltwalkers? What is your point?
Again, he smirked.
"My "point" my dear boy? I'm afraid I do not know what you mean! Or what I mean! I don't know what "point," or "mean," means! It is all Greek to me, or perhaps, Klingon. It does not matter. I produced the work because I thought it'd be interesting to see tall elephants, and turns out I was right. As an added stroke of luck, others seemed to agree! So I did not have to share my colleagues destinies of living in people's trash cans. I thank Jebus everyday."

>>22817123
It was evident to me that he was putting serious effort into appearing whimsical. At first, I thought he simply was whimsical, but what I saw in those eyes made me feel otherwise. There was more to this man, behind his "just playing around" posture, and I do not mean he was masking a certain profundity or depth, although I didn't doubt his intellect. What I ummistakably saw, rather than whimsy or boyish fun, was an unrelenting, seething, unsatisfied hatred.
"Sorry, sir, I simply don't buy that. It seems to me that a man of your caliber doesn't do anything, unless he is doing it deliberately."
"My boy! You're still worried? I promise I'm not going to harm you, do you not trust this old soul?"
"I didn't mean that, actually. I meant the painting. It seems more deliberate than just wanting to see elephants."
"Ahhh...why must you uprights always insist upon the ulteriorness of other men? Pardon me, but it is the epitome of frustration, dealing with you! Perhaps YOU cannot see it as possible, pure expression, with your plotting ways, but some of us are just living what we breathe, there is no method, only the madness remai--."
This time, I cut him off.
"Yeah, I don't believe you though. The colors, the placement, all seem deliberate. In all your work, not just in this item. Surely there's some reason..."
My probing had finally bore fruit, as at this point, the charm seemed to suck itself out of his skin like a demon in an exorcism, and that same emptiness I saw in the eyes, took root in the rest of him, too.
"REASON? Ah-ha! Another "man of REASON," I knew it! Why must your kind be so insufferable? Certainly, I cannot also be a man, God is playing some kind a joke on us both! I know you cannot conceive of it, Mr. Reason, but when an artist creates, he does not have a "reason" in the way you think of the word. The creation, IS the reason for the act of creating!"
"Is it, though, sir? I've admired your work for years...are you to tell me that the clocks in the Persistence of Time were innocent fun? No thought went into their placement, or the theme, just a schoolyard drawing, pure at heart?"
He seemed visibly irritated now, and scoffed loudly, before replying.
"Well what ELSE would it be, you fool? ALL of my work, is meaningless! I am not a sell out with an agenda, like the rats you see in the sewers all around you. I create with my blood, and the world has lost its heart, so they no longer know what blood is."
"I think your work has meaning, though. The meaninglessness, seems like the meaning."
He stopped moving entirely, all pretense of charm was dissipated, and he finally broke:
"The meaninglessness is the meaning?"
"Yeah, it seems like it's deliberately nihilistic, or as you call it, "absurd."
"Well yes, to an extent it is. I have not denied it, but you're ascribing a motivation...that part is the falsehood. I do deliberate to express with purity, to avoid an agenda, a "meaning," but that is the only motive, to avoid a motive!"

>>22817129
I stopped questioning him, but my face must have showed that i was still not convinced.
"My boy, again: if I am lying to you, then WHAT ON EARTH would the motive be? It's a painting about tall elephants, it's nonsense!"
"Vengeance and resentment."
His brow furrowed. "I beg your pardon?"
"You asked, and I'm answering honestly. Rage. Resentment. Jealousy. Revenge. You are arguing to me that you avoid meaning, on purpose, because to have a meaning in one's work, is to compromise it as art. But lots of art prior to yours, had meanings that were central. That doesn't sound like an attempt at purity to me. It sounds like a declaration of war, a blitzkrieg against meaning. If I had to guess, beneath that quirky, affable visage of the Caped Painter, lies a man who hates this world and everything in it. But instead of confronting this, or, as some brutes do, releasing the pain with some act of sadist violence; you are too weak in body or spirit for that sort of thing, so you create works that assault the concept of concepts. Without concepts, there is no world to speak of, thus, your work is an assault on the world, which you despise. I think everything within you, is a front."

Then he tortured me to death and ate my corpse. The end.


sorry again for the multis
Thanks for letting me post it
I dont do this often and wont spam

>>22816051
For the most part, I've written them as any other character. Cocky at times, nice at times, scared at times. Most recent volume I just finished had her terrified because she might not get back to her mother in time before she is executed.

>wroiting a tragic story
>receive really good news in my life
>things are picking up again for the first time in like a decade or so
>lose all inspiration

should I intentionally make risky decisions to ruin my life (again) so I can write proper tragic stories again? (that nobody reads of cares for)
after all a good artist is tormented

>>22817156
I joke, but no, I would say don't ruin your life for the sake of a story unless it is your livelihood at stake.

>>22817046
I know my demographic but that doesn't mean people outside it won't enjoy what I offer

>>22817094
You can look up irl one armed fighter Nick Newell who has exactly that disability

haha.... ha...

>>22817432
>the existence of a goal to which one makes one's way by undergoing every kind of unhappiness.
God bless, Kafka. Stay strong.

>>22817228
The plot is basically
>Globetrotting martial artist (You know the kind. Your Ryus, your Kwai Changs, yada yada) gets into a fight with a psychotic Pankration master that ends with him getting his left forearm torn off.
>2-ish years later he goes to a tournament to get it back in blood
>He has to go through some absolutely absurd fighters and shit, blah blah blah.
>The actual narrative crux however is what happens in between rounds. He talks with the competitors, winner and loser alike, even the ones he defeats, and kind of helps them with their personal problems in a sense by just being an open person who has the will to not just listen, but actually take action. Including but not limited to
>Helping an MMA fighter's perceived failing marriage by getting her to realize that her wife still loves her, despite how she feels she isn't the same person that her wife fell in love with.
>Restoring a priest's faith in God. See, they knew each other and the priest, himself a martial artist, found great happiness in watching our MC follow his passion. But after watching him lose his arm to a lunatic his faith was shaken. But after they fight, this actually restores the priest's faith because he sees how our protagonist didn't let this horrible loss break him and kept fighting anyways.
>Most importantly, he finds a 10 year old kickboxing prodigy with an incredibly abusive home life. Her parents never stop exploiting her, neglecting her, and hurting her. So he basically acts as the father figure she never had.
>All of this kindness actually play into the finale. See, in the second to last round, he gets his chance at revenge when he faces Mr. Pankration. He does really well, but ultimately loses hard and loses his eye in the process.
>The final round is the abused kickboxing girl vs Pankration man
>The girl wins because she can do things like adapt, improvise, and evolve. Mr. Pankration didn't do any of these things ever since he completed his training, just relying on his "Perfect" martial arts without anything too out of left field.
Yada yada

>>22817529
>her wife
Nah, I'm good.

>>22816666
No I would not.

>>22816676
Good to know.

I think that settles things. Thank you.

>>22817542
>He doesn't want MMA girl to have soft GF

>>22817727
I don't, no.

>>22816663
>50k words per book/ volume, serialized, and genre

This isn't some kind of definition of LNs. Western authors have been writing book series like that long before you were even born and they didn't call them "light novels"

My novel will have 60k words tops by what I'm calculating. Is that enough or too little or I shouldn't care too much about it?

>>22817811
For traditional sale? It's novella territory and unmarketable. Cut some fat and you have a solid novella you could self pub.

>>22817156
Just have multiple projects on hand at a time. I flip between 2-3 stories in the works every few days, maybe every week, since the mood of each is different enough that no matter how I feel I can write something.

Also congrats on the upturn

>>22818018
I'm writer blocked on my other project and while I know how I want it to continue from big picture the fucking little details are tripping me up.

>>22817760
Why not?

>>22817529
I guess a lot hangs on your ability to write fight scenes. Any excerpts?

Does this ability completely break any sort of nuanced plot, or am I overthinking it?
>Path of Honesty (Basic)
>User's intent in their words and actions will always be understood and never misinterpreted.

>>22817529
>origin story of the wise master stock character
Nice concept. Attaining enlightenment through suffering is a very classic martial arts story, but showing the journey of the guy dishing out the wisdom and training is an interesting spin. It's pretty anime, but not in a bad way. Is there any one event in your mind that pulls him from thirst for vengeance to a desire to uplift others?

Here is a Nick Newell fight:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HzKXjeck5w4

He as you will see is mostly a grappler. Missing a limb seems to be somewhat like the "southpaw advantage". It's not actually objectively better in most respects to be left handed in a fight, but because most opponents are mostly facing right handed competition it makes you awkward due to unfamiliarity. With Newell, it was essentially impossible for opponents to prepare for the unique choke variations he uses so he would get tricky submission wins. Not having anything to block right hands with is a problem though.


>>22818168
I like how gigachad is child sized in this.

>>22818168
I'm in the same boat. Just muscle through a bit man, even 100 words, even 50, or a scene you do know better detail-wise. Details are mostly for editing anyways, just gotta get something down for that first draft, even if it is slop.

Or just start on another draft like I did do not do this please

>>22818510
It could, but since it's self-focused (seemingly) don't think so (kinda like an extreme version Prince Myshkin or Alyosha Karamazov, still plenty of opportunity for drama). Philosophically it presents sort of a dilemma since it's almost an invasion of the other's empathy too, maybe.

>>22818332
Kay. How's this buildup for a fight between the priest and a kung fu master.
>Both took their stances. Immediately the contrast between the two shone. Merely glancing at them, especially with a trained eye like my own, pointed out every difference from the colossal to the minute.
>One was tall. Couldn't be older than 30 at most, his efficient, triangular frame showing even through his changshan. His stance was recognizable, so to speak. Clear He was low to the ground, mostly because of how low he was squatting. His right foot was on the backmost position and firmly on the ground, as the only parts of his left that made any contact with the mat were his forefoot and toes, his left leg raised into the air slightly. His torso was straight as an arrow in a slight backwards diagonal, at least from what I could tell considering his clothes didn't show any finer details. His arms were far in front of him, his palms opened and freed, ready to move in any way imaginable. His neck was tilted straight upwards, with a near-complete lack of any emotion on his face, focusing on his senior foe like a tiger hunting
a wounded animal. All of this coupled with minor adjustments he made every other second gave him an ethereal appearance, as if any attack thrown at him would just pass through or slip off.
>His opponent, Father Kelly, was short by comparison. I knew how old he was, roughly 42. Yet he looked older, paler, frailer, and weaker than a man his health and age should. As if something had eaten away at his spirit from within. Yet the way he stood was something I knew all too well from when we sparred back in the day. He didn't wear very revealing clothing, the only visible parts of his body, aside from his neck and head, being his forearms and lower shins, but that position was still unmistakable after 2 years. It was apparent this "Weakness" I was seeing was only skin deep. The moment I noticed the truth of his stance, he felt even mightier than before. His physique was unchanged, a small yet solid block of functional muscle and bone that would not yield to anyone or anything. He stood straight, and while his feet were positioned diagonally they weren't all that changed from a basic standing position. Yet there was an overwhelmingly solidity to them, like that of a stone pillar. His upper back and neck were craned forward, giving him a slight hunchback. And then there were his hands. His arms were far in front, like his opponent, but they weren't relaxed at all. They were tense like steel cables, nary any motion. His hands were similar, in a half-gripping position, with every tensed sinew and muscle giving them a statue-like quality. His face, however, told another story. He didn't seem like he was focusing on his opponent at all, his eyes staring dead-ahead, as if there was something directly behind his opposition he wanted to see.
>Soft against hard. Liquid against solid. Flexibility against tension.
>Which would win?

>>22817156
Literally just improve your empathy and/or memory until you can evoke the necessary feelings at will, anon.

>>22818595
Not exactly. He doesn't exactly take her under his wing because he can't support her in the ways that a child truly needs. So he gives her to a childless couple but promises to visit often, which is a promise he makes good on.

>>22818636
And now the fight
>The moment the signal sounded, the master closed distance in a way that looked incredibly goofy to all in the audience, myself included. I could barely hold back a chuckle. All that seriousness for nothing but one of the stupidest looking things I've ever seen.
>It looked like he was shuffling, but really fast, his ankles becoming like blurs. Like his feet weren't touching the floor at all. It was borderline cartoonish. Yet it allowed him to keep his stance, so I sort of understood
>Glancing over to Father Kelly, I noticed he still wasn't moving. At all. Except for his face. It slowly gained more and more of a grimace, as his neck slowly started to flex.
>The moment he was in range, he lunged out with a whip-like palm strike, sounding like a gunshot and leaving an immediate red mark on Kelly's face. Yet he didn't move an inch, instead reaching out and grabbing the collar of his fluid enemy and pulling him in closer before grabbing his elbow. The master responded with a kick from his backmost right foot, the fluid motions of his waist augmenting the strike like a flail.
>Before it could land, Father Kelly swept his pillar-like leg right into the left shin of his foe. The toes and forefoot gave way, and in the blink of an eye Kelly bent forward and slammed the master on the ground like an angry gorilla, visibly knocking the wind out of him. He let go and stood back up before stepping back, his grimace more intense than before.
>What followed next was something even I didn't see coming. The master slammed his hands against the ground, propelling himself through the air like someone launched him catapulted him. He spun through the air, preparing to deliver what I could only assume was some kind of buzzsaw axe kick. He looked pretty confident, but...
>In only 10 seconds, my worldview was shattered.
>Kelly reached out once more and grabbed the kick before pulling the "Kung-Fu Monster" in close once again. I thought he would just go for the collar, but he didn't. No, he went for the collarbone. A nauseating crunch and the master screamed out in agony, blood pooling around the stone-like fingers of his senior. But Kelly wasn't done yet. He slammed the master on the ground once again, his kicking legs and cries barely dissuading the statue of a man he was facing. He shoved his fingers into the master's screaming mouth, gripping onto his jaw, before yanking, another crunch sounding out. The screaming stopped as the master's eyes rolled up into his head and Kelly, his fingers stained with blood
>This was not the Father Kelly I knew from all those years back. His mighty grip was only for making sure his opponents didn't go flying as he calmly swept them off their feet to a soft mat. He was always about simply knocking his opponent down, never taking it any further than that. But this? This was violence. This tournament never had any holds barred, but the one I knew would never take advantage of such a lack of rules.

It's impossible to hide my misanthropic, anti human, pro extinction views no matter what I write. Fiction, Anti Art, Non Fiction, anything.

>>22818267
woke lesbo crap

>>22816258
I still don't know what they are.

>>22818267
Homosexuality is disgusting.

>>22818904
Woke implies I'm trying to do representation. I'm doing it because I find the idea of a man soiling this woman abhorrent

>>22818961
This you?
>>22816158

>>22818970
Anon #2 here. What is your fucking problem?

>>22818984
Your posts were similarly simpy/cuckish, so I assumed you were the same person. On second read, it appears you used "him" in your post, so it seems I was mistaken.

>>22818995
Because if I see a cute girl, my first thought is "Boy I sure hope she doesn't get fucked"

Looked over 6 chapters today, nearly done for the year and then it's onto some technical document sorting.

>>22819012
You should look into fixing that.

>>22819023
What, you want me to have a rapist mindset?

>>22818995
Nothing in my post was "simpy" or "cuckish". (You) are mentally ill. (You) need to have sex. (You) need to learn to read.

>>22819025
Are you saying all sex is necessarily rape?

>>22819025
It's not any of my business. I'm just saying if you see a woman and the first thing on your mind is getting angry that she has had or may have sex with a man in the future, you're going to have problems writing female characters, among many other things.

>>22819039
Because despite the fact I'm a man I'm what you might call "Super-straight."
In that I'm so thoroughly disgusted by men's bodies that I can't fathom the idea of one having sex without wanting to vomit

>>22819044
Like I said, you should look into fixing that. You sound two steps away from trooning out.

>>22819050
I hate troons as well.
If I write a straight romance in my stories it's with an adorable robot.

>>22819082
>>22819082
>>22819082
...with a whole new OP image for you to seethe about...

>>22818961
>>22819012
Chris Chan? Is that you?

>>22802491
You all suck @ writing because you basically shit post all day then shit out a new half arsed page of stream of consciousness "prose" that sits unedited until you post it online for free. Get a real writing tool.